Take Charge
by MantaI-305Apollo'sChariot
Summary: The events over the last few months have left Elsa stressed, but queens can't take breaks. As Elsa juggles between caring for both her country and herself, she also struggles to enact a plan that could change the lives of hundreds of children. And new information about just how far her powers can potentially extend will eventually have an impact far outside Arendelle.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Thank you for clicking on my story!**

 **DISCLAIMER: I don't own Frozen, obviously.**

 **This is a direct sequel to 'Changing Family Tides'. It's now about 8 months or so after the movie, or late March. You don't HAVE to go read any of my previous stories, but there will be "spoilers" from them. Also, if you're a new reader, feel free to PM me questions or ask them in a review.:)**

 **On to the story!:)**

Anna smiled as she peeked in her older sister's room. Elsa lay fast asleep curled up on her side with one arm tossed protectively around her adopted daughter, five-year-old Anikka. Elsa's black and white kitten Kolfinnia was curled up at her feet. "Come on, you guys, let's just leave Elsa alone. She's prob'ly all worn out from that whole surprise thing she planned for everyone." Anna had loved Elsa's surprise; she and their entire family plus a couple friends had taken a trip to the ice palace. _And Elsa was actually happy and confident for once._

A series of different bad incidents had left Elsa often upset and unsure of herself, which Anna hated, especially since she had been part of the reason why Elsa was hurt. Rapunzel had long since healed Elsa's physical injuries, all except Elsa's weak leg, which meant Elsa had to wear a brace to be able to walk. Rapunzel's healing magic only applied to injuries caused by natural means, not by magic. But Rapunzel had not been able to heal Elsa inside. Anna didn't _mind_ her sister's damaged mind and heart-she would always take care of Elsa no matter what-but she just wanted Elsa to be truly happy again. To actually have real confidence in herself and her abilities.

"I still feel rotten for what I did to her, even if it was Jade's fault and not really mine," Anna muttered to herself as she eased Elsa's door shut silently. _Elsa told me it wasn't my fault. I even remember exactly what she said the day after Papa rescued us from that cave._ Anna had been poisoned with fire magic that caused her to literally turn against Elsa, and she'd ended up shooting Elsa with an arrow in her shoulder, on top of saying some really mean things to her. _Elsa said, 'That wasn't you. That was Jade's fire power crystal she used to hit you in the heart.' And she said she wouldn't ever be scared of me when she was clearheaded and awake, but she might be if she had a nightmare or was otherwise really, really upset or scared._

* * *

Elsa jerked awake in the middle of the night when she felt something shaking her. Instantly she bolted upright in bed, her blue eyes darting nervously from side to side. "What's going on?!" _Elsa, calm down. You're safe at home. Anikka probably was trying to shake you awake._

"I gotta go potty," Anikka informed Elsa.

Elsa tried not to sigh. "Anikka, I know you can do that by yourself. You're five, not three. You can use my bathroom, of course," she assured the child. _Anikka, please don't ask me to come with you. I'm so tired and I'll have to put that brace on and then take it right back off again._

Elsa's silent wish went unheard. "I not like th' dark. Scary," Anikka whimpered. "Elsa come so I not be scared." Anikka suddenly remembered Elsa's bad leg and added, "It ok. Elsa stay in bed. I go by myself. Elsa not walk good." She hopped out of bed and ran to the bathroom as Elsa lit the kerosene lamp on the nightstand.

"Anikka, you had better call me if you need help for whatever reason, okay?" Elsa called, feeling half relieved and half guilty that Anikka had decided to just face her slight fear of the dark and go by herself. _I should get up and at least just stand outside the bathroom door for her._ With that thought, Elsa quickly strapped her brace on her leg and headed over to the bathroom. "I'm right out here, Anikka," she reassured the little girl.

"Ok," the little girl called back.

A minute later, Anikka opened the door, informed Elsa that she liked the smell of the soap in the bathroom, and then just crawled back under the covers. "Elsa did…not need t' get up. I know Elsa sleepy," she added. "Timothy trusted you," Anikka said abruptly. Then she scooted closer to Elsa and immediately fell back asleep.

Elsa just smiled a bit as she gently put her arm around Anikka. _Why did Anikka tell me that all of a sudden? She hasn't talked about Timothy in a while…_ Timothy was Anikka's older brother who had died in a fire. _Anikka must have sensed you don't trust yourself somehow, Elsa._ "Thank you, Anikka," she whispered.

* * *

Although she was tired, Elsa still awoke early the next morning. Making sure not to disturb Anikka, she quickly got dressed and rebraided her hair; then abruptly jumped when she heard a faint knock on her door. She limped over to the door, avoiding the few boards that she knew creaked, and peeked out into the hall. "Gerda, Anikka's still sleeping, she whispered. "I just woke up myself."

"Miss Elsa, that's why I knocked so quietly. I figured if you were still asleep, you just wouldn't answer. I thought perhaps you would like a snack and go ahead and work on your therapy for today. If you don't want to, that's perfectly fine," Gerda finished, wanting to make sure she let Elsa know it was her own choice, not anyone else's.

Elsa immediately opened her door fully and let Gerda in. "Okay. Could you help me in here so I don't have to leave Anikka alone? I don't think she'll wake up unless we're really noisy." She pointed at each creaky board as Gerda followed her inside. "That one creaks…and that one…and that one," she pointed out. _What if this doesn't work? I'll have wasted Gerda's time and gotten myself all hopeful for nothing._ "Gerda…what if this turns out to be a waste of time?" Elsa asked, her pale face scrunching up in disappointment at that prospect,

"Then we will at least _know_ that it was a waste of time, and you will still just be our beautiful and perfectly competent Queen Elsa," Gerda told her gently but firmly. She guided Elsa over to her desk chair and told her to please sit down.

Elsa willingly obeyed and just looked to Gerda, wondering what she was supposed to do next.

"Miss Elsa, at the moment our goal is to get your left leg so it works as well as your right one. So right now you are going to show me how well you move your good leg, okay? But first take that brace off so you'll be more comfortable." Gerda gave Elsa a reassuring smile, but the girl didn't smile back. She looked nervous. _Elsa, please don't beat yourself up the first day. Please._

Elsa was more than happy to take her brace off; she knew she was in a safe environment and she didn't want to look at it right now, either. Then she easily followed Gerda's instructions to move her good leg about as an example. Elsa tilted her head to one side curiously as Gerda helped her sit down on the floor with her legs stretched in front of her. "Gerda, I haven't tried to do that since I was really little," she protested. "Just because I could do it then doesn't mean I can do it now!"

"Just try to touch your toes, Miss Elsa. I don't care if you can't; that's not the point. We just want to know exactly where we're starting from, that's all," Gerda explained. She frowned as Elsa almost immediately yelped in pain, but then let her bad leg bend aside and easily reached her good foot with no trouble at all.

"I feel like I could prob'ly put my right foot behind my head fairly easily if I wanted to," Elsa said in puzzlement. "But my left leg hurts too much to stretch it like that…it's all stiff. How are we going to fix that?" _I didn't expect this to be easy, but I didn't expect there to be such a huge discrepancy like that. That's disappointing._ She awkwardly half-crawled, half-dragged herself over onto the carpet where Gerda told her to go. _Gerda doesn't seem disappointed,_ she thought hopefully.

Gerda helped Elsa lay flat on her tummy and then told her to try to touch her toes to her head. "And before you say you can't, I'll tell you it doesn't matter. We are not trying to teach you how to be a circus contortionist performer or something."

Elsa easily touched her right foot to her head, but she simply couldn't move her left one on her own enough to even find out. "Gerda, I…I can't get the other one to move," she admitted hesitantly. She nodded in agreement when Gerda offered to help her. "Okay." Elsa bit her lip, determined not to yelp again. "My knee hurts, Gerda," she said finally. Elsa smiled as she turned over and sat back up. "I could feel my toes brushing my hair. That means it's _almost_ as flexible as my good one bending in that direction," she announced.

"It also means whatever damage still remains, it's most likely not in your back, Miss Elsa. What I don't understand is why you're still a bendy pretzel without even trying for years. Unless of course that was something you practiced by yourself…before," Gerda replied. "Miss Elsa, I think this proves something else. You cannot wear that brace twenty-four hours a day. Ever. You are going to have to get over your fear and take it off a lot more often than you do. Perhaps cut it down to twelve hours each day. A good portion of that time can be at night when you're sleeping. You're decreasing flexibility and range of motion by forcing it to stay in one position all the time. I've been suspicious of that happening eventually, but I didn't say anything because I knew you were hurt before and you couldn't deal with it then. But you're better now, Miss Elsa." Gerda hugged Elsa tightly when the girl scooted closer to her. "And please don't start blaming yourself. You didn't know, and I know what happened with Jade and everything else hurt you badly. And all that was right after you had been seriously ill. That was a string of nasty things happening one right after the other."

Elsa just scowled at her bad leg and then scratched at a bite on her arm. A look of confusion suddenly flitted across her face as she realized just what she had done. "Gerda…mosquitoes usually come out later in the spring…don't they?" she asked slowly.

"Yes, why?" Gerda asked; then frowned as she realized why Elsa had asked her question. Without asking, she quickly pushed Elsa's sleeve up and looked closely at Elsa's arm where she had been scratching. "That looks like a spider bite, Miss Elsa. Do you feel dizzy or nauseous or anything else strange?" Elsa shook her head and Gerda instantly sighed in relief. "You're most likely fine, but you have to tell someone if you start feeling sick or something. I imagine something bit you when you went out and bought everyone's gifts that you handed out at the ice palace."

"I didn't even notice it 'til just now." Elsa looked up when she heard something thump lightly on the floor. "Good morning, Anikka."

* * *

Anikka happily plopped on the floor next to Elsa. "Gerda, teach Elsa how t' walk?" she asked hopefully. "So Elsa not need brace any-more?"

Gerda excused herself from Elsa and took Anikka aside for a moment. "Anikka, do you understand the idea of something personal you don't really want to talk about?" she asked quietly. The little girl nodded, so Gerda went on, "Well, Elsa's leg and her brace are 'something personal' she doesn't really want to talk about. Anikka, Elsa might always need her brace. We don't know yet."

"Why? You helping Elsa," Anikka replied. "Elsa has magic."

Gerda sighed. "Anikka, Elsa's leg is badly hurt. Just _please_ leave her alone about it."

Elsa's sharp ears had picked up nearly every word Gerda and Anikka had said, and her blue eyes welled with tears as she stared at her bad leg. "Gerda…it…it's okay. Just let Anikka come over here for a moment," she said softly. The second Anikka had flopped onto the carpet next to her, Elsa shakily pointed at her bad leg. "Anikka, see how it...looks funny compared to the other one? The muscles are all messed up. Gerda has to try to teach me how to strengthen my leg before I can ever even try walking by myself." Elsa never really paid that much attention to the way her leg looked when she wasn't wearing her brace, at least not recently. Realizing that all the months of not being able to use her leg properly had made it look physically smaller than the other one scared her. How could she and Gerda fix that? No wonder she couldn't move her leg very well at all. She probably wasn't strong enough to do so. _That explains why I thought I'd fixed all the damaged nerves with my magic and I still couldn't move it properly. I probably_ did _fix all the nerves._

Anikka hesitantly touched the older girl's leg and then simply smiled at her and gave her a hug. "Still Elsa. I not care if Elsa always need her brace," she announced. Anikka scrambled to her feet and looked very seriously at Elsa. "I leave. I find Kiara. Then Elsa have pi-va-cy."

"Privacy," Elsa corrected, but she was smiling. "Thank you, Anikka."

* * *

Down the hall in her room, Anna had woken up, but couldn't be bothered to actually get out of bed. She took the old diary Elsa had given her out from under her pillow and opened it to the first entry. This one was dated January 1, from when Elsa was eight. _'Mama and Papa gave me this diary for Christmas. They said I am old enough to write in a journal now. Does that mean I'm a big girl now? They always either treat me like a grown-up or a baby. I'm 8! I think it ought to be_ _somwhere_ _somewhere in between. (Somewhere is a compound word.) I have to stop writing because Anna is trying to jump on me to make me give her a piggyback ride. I love Anna but she's a great big pest sometimes. Right now she's making me want to smack her. But that's mean. I think I'll tickle her instead or dump snow down her back. Or better yet freeze her bed. –Princess Elsa'_

Anna giggled at that but then made a face. Pre-accident little Elsa outright admitted that sometimes she felt like smacking Anna. That she planned to tickle Anna and purposely dump snow down her back or freeze her bed. She actually sounded like a normal, happy little girl. (Well, except for the comment about somewhere being a compound word. Anna did not understand why any eight-year-old would care about that.) But besides that, Elsa's writing sounded like an average little girl's should. Knowing that the last entry sounded much older and very, very depressing besides and that it had been written only a little over a year later made Anna both angry and upset. Part of her didn't even _want_ to read little Elsa's diary anymore. _No, Elsa gave it to me to read. And I want to read it. It's Elsa's and Elsa hates talking about when she was little._ She went on to the next entry, this one dated the very next day after the first one.

 _'It snowed overnight! I'm so happy and excited. Papa doesn't mind my magic so much when there's natural snow outside, for one thing. But the best part is I get to play outside with Anna. Anna told me she wants to jump off the roof into the snow. I said only if it's really, really powdery and deep AND I go first to make sure it's safe AND no grown-ups are watching. I don't think I like writing much. I like drawing lines and shapes and stuff better. During lessons I drew a square optical ilusion with a bunch of squares around each other from a teeny one to a big one. I was supposed to be writing a paragraph though so I got in trouble. –Princess Elsa' P.S. It's 'illusion', not 'ilusion'._ Anna grinned, thinking it was funny that her usually proper big sister had gotten in trouble for drawing _optical illusions,_ of all things, when she was supposed to be working on a paragraph.

The next few entries were written every two to three days. Two were only carefully drawn, very detailed snowflakes with a short written bit that just said, _'I think snowflake patterns are so pretty'_. Anna noted that neither was her sister's signature pattern. Little Elsa wrote nothing for weeks; then came back with more detailed drawings, this time simply geometric shapes. Then another actual writing entry from March, _'We just got back from camping for the first time since winter ended. I wanted to go swimming, but Papa wouldn't let us because it was too cold. I kind of sort of made a really pretty dress made of ice and he got mad at me for that, too. But it was all twirly and sparkly and it made me happy. I walked on the pool (on ice) where we usually go swimming and Anna ended up falling in and I got in big trouble. I ran off by myself for awhile and Anna came too. We got lost, but Mama and Papa rescued us. I didn't need to run away. I have Anna and she loves me just like I am. I don't think Papa means to, but he hurts me a lot sometimes. I'm glad I have a little sister like Anna. –Princess Elsa'_ "I remember that!" Anna exclaimed. She decided to stop reading there and read more later, knowing that was probably one of the few remaining pre-accident entries.

* * *

Back in Elsa's room, Gerda gently but firmly instructed Elsa what to do for her leg from now on. "Miss Elsa, the brace stays off unless you absolutely need to put it on. I'm almost wondering if it would be better for you to use your powers to make those air currents more often or something. It worries me that it's so stiff and not just weak. But we'll figure it out," she assured Elsa.

"I _can't walk_ without it, Gerda," Elsa replied quietly. "At all. My knee just collapses under me if I try to put any weight on it. You saw me. I almost twisted it the wrong way when I got frustrated…" _Elsa, calm down. Gerda will help you figure out what to do and you know it._

"I know, Miss Elsa, I know," Gerda said quickly. "It's only the first day. We'll figure something out. For now, just wear it as little as possible. If you're working at your desk, take it off. If you're eating a meal at the table, take it off. If you're sitting in bed reading, take it off. Try to move it a little bit on your own each time. You can't expect yourself to be all better instantly anyways. All right?"

Elsa nodded and bit at one of her fingernails. "Okay." _I can do that. I am not going to get all scared and upset over nothing anymore._ She gave Gerda a lopsided smile as she added, "Thank you for just… _helping_ me. It means a lot because I know you don't have to."

Gerda didn't remind the girl that yes, she did have to help Elsa. It was her job to help and protect the royal family in any way she could. Helping Elsa with her bad leg definitely fit that criteria. Besides, Elsa still somehow seemed like a daughter to her, probably because she had been the one adult Elsa had truly had there for her for all those years isolated in her room. She'd seen little eight-year-old Elsa cry all night the first night after the accident. She'd seen grown-up Elsa cry all too many times. And she'd seen Elsa's sweet smiles and laughter, too. "Miss Elsa, it is an honor for me to help you. Seeing you happy makes me happy, too," Gerda said finally.

"I still want to say thank-you. You could have left me alone for all that time, but you didn't. Even when I wanted to be by myself, you still let me know you were there for me. You've helped me every time I've been physically hurt somehow, too." Elsa smiled a bit, her blue eyes filled with mixed tears. "I love Mama very much, I really do, but…but you feel more like a real mommy to me," she whispered. _That's the truth, and I know Mama would be really upset if she heard me say that, but…it's true. "_ Oh, and Gerda?" she went on, remembering her other plans she wanted to enact. "I'm going to find a way to help abused children in Arendelle. I already have a detailed plan for what I want to do, but I think I'm going to need help."

* * *

"Agdar, I want to do something special for Elsa and Anna before we move," Idun told Agdar. "Something both of them would like."

"Well, figure it out soon. We leave in two weeks for Weselton since Elsa ceded it to us," Agdar replied. "I need to talk with Elsa about exactly how she wants the relationship between Weselton and Arendelle to work, and what to do if the people there don't take kindly to us."

Idun smiled. "It's nice to hear you say you'll ask Elsa for advice instead of trying to tell her what to do." Her smile faded as she remembered something. "Agdar…our little girl constructed a beautiful, major work of architecture without even drawing anything up first. Neither Elsa nor Anna said when Elsa built that place, but I think I know when. She made her ice palace after running away from her coronation party. I know she did. Elsa was frightened and so she ran. She must have felt safe on the North Mountain somehow."

Agdar's expression contorted as if in pain. "Some venue of safety. We know those despicable thugs from the former duke attacked her there and Hans dropped that huge chandelier on the second floor on her. What I don't understand after seeing that palace for myself is _why the heck_ didn't she freeze the doors shut? Or throw up an ice wall to keep them from coming inside in the first place? Why did they even have a chance to drop her own chandelier on her?"

"She was scared and she didn't want to hurt them, Agdar," Idun said quietly. "Elsa probably just wanted to be left alone. But no, they dragged her back to Arendelle and chained her in the dungeon. Just like we did twice."

"They attacked first with intent to kill. Elsa had full rights to defend herself with force," Agdar responded flatly. _Wait…I remember Elsa_ drew _something similar to the way her ice palace looks when she was sixteen. She had them fastened on her wall, and I fussed at her for using ice to hold them up. Did Elsa have dreams of building something like that for that long?!_

"What are you thinking about?" Idun asked, noticing that her husband's expression had grown pensive.

"That ice palace wasn't thought of on a whim, Idun," Agdar replied, his voice carefully neutral but his expression saying something very different. "Elsa had _dreams_ , something imaginary she had to rely on because I hurt her. She had detailed drawings that looked suspiciously similar to what her ice palace looks like fastened on her wall when she was sixteen."

Idun frowned at her husband and just stared at him. "Why on earth does it surprise you that the girl had dreams?! Of course she did! Everyone has them. It's just Elsa shouldn't have had to have a dream that she could just have a place where she could be herself without her own parents hurting her. But she's going to be all right. The fact that Elsa's ice palace exists in real life proves that," she said firmly.

 **A/N: Once again, if you're new to my Frozen story-verse, please, _please_ , feel free to PM me questions and/or ask them in a review. I'll do my best to answer any questions about what's happened previously (like why Arendelle now controls Weselton; or why Elsa's leg is hurt and Rapunzel can't heal it, for examples), why certain characters are acting the way they are, or anything else. :)**

 **Next chapter coming soon!**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Thanks to everyone who's followed/favorited and/or is reading but not reviewing.:)**

 **princessdianaofparadiseisland-Hi sis!:) Well, little Elsa kept that journal when she was 8 and 9, so yes, it will get depressing.:P Drawing snowflake patterns seemed like something she would do, and besides, snowflake patterns ARE fun to draw, if rather difficult, lol.:/ Elsa's kitten Kolfinnia is just a black and white tuxedo cat. Anna and Kiara simply found her back in 'Mind Games' and Anna gave the kitten to Elsa for Christmas.:) No promises about the spider bite, although I think you'll like the solution!**

 **mctiffanygamingmc-I'm glad you like them.:) I have no intentions of stopping my stories. Even if updates get farther apart because of school or something, I still won't stop entirely:)**

 **Elsa Tomago-The other reason Elsa's therapy is difficult for her is because it makes her feel vulnerable, and I think EVERYONE hates that, not just her. At least she's working with Gerda, someone she really trusts.:) I'm glad you like Elsa's diary! Parents in my experience _don't_ ask for their kid's opinion, ever. Granted, most parents don't have a daughter who's the reigning queen of their country, but still.:P I'm glad you like Idun's idea, too.**

 **the green baron-I'm glad you like it:)**

 **Olivia O'Neil-Thank you!:) Just...please don't expect Elsa's leg to be all better instantly.:P I just thought that was something Anikka needed to tell Elsa eventually.:)**

 **raven678-Elsa also needs to simply rest and de-stress herself. She's still fragile inside and she needs to improve her self-image, although technically I think she's needed that since she was little...:/ Anyways, I'm glad you like my story:)**

 **On to the story!**

"Kiara oughta talk t' Elsa," Anikka said matter-of-factly. "Elsa help you lots. I know Elsa would."

Kiara sighed as she flopped down on her bed. _Elsa's been so nice to me, though. She gave me this room to be my own; she took me in when I didn't have anywhere to go. She even forgave me for causing her to be permanently hurt. How can I talk to her about whether or not I should try to go home? I love it here, but I'm from the Southern Isles. That's my home. My family shouldn't dislike me anymore since I no longer have those electricity powers…_ "Anikka, I can't insult Elsa. She's the queen and she's my friend. My stupid brother was part of that horrid plot against her and her family," she said finally. _And I know Elsa doesn't trust me completely-I don't think she trusts anyone except her sister and Gerda, really-but still. She has to trust me some or she wouldn't let me stay here or be my friend._

"Elsa not like people lie t' her," Anikka said, struggling to phrase her words properly. "Tell Elsa truth. That make Elsa happy. Elsa tell Kiara what t' do. Elsa help. I know so."

"How do you know?" Kiara asked peevishly. After all, she was nearly twelve now. How could a five-year-old know more of what to do than she did? Kiara was over six years older than Anikka.

Anikka looked down and scuffed her toes back and forth on the floor. "Elsa hurt easy inside. Elsa not need friends that lie t' her," she replied, hoping Kiara would understand what she meant. Anikka may have been only five, but she knew there was something different about Elsa that made her feel hurt easily. And she loved Elsa very much; the older girl made Anikka feel safe and at _home_ , even though she had trouble doing that for herself. "D'you think Elsa mind if I call her mommy?" Anikka asked hopefully.

"I don't know. Probably she wouldn't mind. Why don't you ask her?" Kiara suggested. _I should talk to Elsa myself. Anikka does have a point, even if I don't want her to…_

Anikka eagerly ran off to find Elsa.

* * *

Elsa yelped in surprise when Anikka nearly barreled her over in the hallway. "Anikka, what are you so excited about?" she asked, giving the little girl a smile. Elsa couldn't help giggling at Anikka's excited bouncing.

"Elsa, mommy Elsa, c'n I call Elsa mommy?" Anikka asked hopefully.

Anna heard the little girl's question from a ways down the hall and stopped in her tracks so she could hear Elsa's response. _Elsa's either going to start happy-crying or she's going to be actually scared._ Anna couldn't see Elsa's expression, but she did see her big sister's shoulders clearly tense up.

"Wh…what?" Elsa asked, her voice shaky. She didn't know whether to feel happy or terrified. Anikka wanted to call _her_ mommy? And she was asking for permission to do so? Elsa felt far more like a much older sister to the little girl than a mother. While Elsa knew girls her age often had babies already, she just didn't feel…qualified enough. If Anikka had been Elsa's birth daughter, Elsa would have been only sixteen at the time. Far, far too young in Elsa's mind…and to anyone else with a logical brain, in Elsa's honest opinion. _I don't think I even_ can _have a baby, anyway, even if I did marry someone,_ Elsa thought to herself. "Anikka, I…I don't _mind_ ; I just…I'm not…qualified," she added finally.

Anikka's little face scrunched up in disappointment as she impulsively threw her arms around Elsa. "Elsa 'dopted me. Elsa my mommy now," she said, refusing to let go of Elsa. "Please, Elsa? Please? I love Elsa." Anikka briefly wondered if Elsa's reaction had something to do with Elsa's status in Arendelle, but she knew that wasn't the case. The older girl just simply thought she wasn't 'good enough'. "Elsa plenty good enough," Anikka added firmly. " _Always_ good enough. Even if sad or scared."

Elsa's sensitive heart melted at that, and her blue eyes filled with tears as she picked Anikka up. "I don't care what you call me, but I'm still not…qualified," she whispered, holding the little girl tightly. Elsa flinched when she felt something touch her shoulder, but relaxed again almost instantly. "Hi, Anna. Sorry I-"

"Sorry nothing," Anna interrupted. "Of course you flinched-I startled you. D'you want to go get breakfast? And did Rapunzel get back home to Corona safely?"

Elsa frowned as she set Anikka down. "No thank you to breakfast. I have something I need to work on. I don't know if Rapunzel arrived home safely or not. Linnae didn't send me a message yet," she repied.

"Maybe your silly ice dragon forgot," Anna suggested. "And you shouldn't skip breakfast."

"I'm not hungry and I feel like I might be getting a stomachache," Elsa explained. "Besides, I really do have something I need to work on. Could you take Anikka down to breakfast, please?" She absentmindedly scratched at the bite on her arm; then bit her lip, wondering if the sort-of-there stomachache and the itchy bite were connected.

Anna immediately scowled and grabbed her sister's arm. "What's wrong with your arm, Elsa?" Her eyes immediately grew big. She knew _exactly_ what was wrong; the same thing had happened to her when she was younger. "Elsa, when did this bite appear?" she asked, starting to drag her sister down the hall. "And where'd it come from?"

"I don't know; I just noticed it earlier this morning. Gerda said it was a spider bite but since I didn't feel sick or weird or anything, I was probably fine," Elsa replied. "Quit yanking me around!" _You said you felt like you were getting a stomachache,_ a little voice told her. _And Gerda specifically told you to tell someone if you started feeling weird._ Elsa tried to just refuse to go any farther, but Anna picked her up and just carried her instead. "Anna, put me down," she said firmly. "I'm not a little kid!"

"I don't care. I'm not having you get really sick like I did," Anna retorted, bracing herself for an annoyed Elsa to just dump snow all over her or something. _Maybe since she feels mostly fine, we can fix it before it affects her any more._

"Anna, what are you talking about? It's just a little bite, and I don't feel ill. I just said I felt like I might be getting a stomachache," Elsa insisted, still struggling to get Anna to put her down. She dropped an ice cube down her little sister's back, but Anna merely held her tighter. "If you won't put me down, then tell me what you're doing," she ordered finally.

"Taking you to the doctor before that bite gets nasty and infected and makes you feel really sick besides. I'm _not_ having you hurt again. No, no, no." Anna gently set Elsa down on her own feet at the bottom of the stairs, but she kept a tight hold on Elsa's hand and refused to let go. "Elsa, you either come willingly on your own or I'll drag you kicking and screaming. If that bite is the same kind that happened to me when I was about ten or so-I don't remember exactly-it looks like nothing at first and gets really really awful."

Elsa did follow Anna on her own, but she still thought her little sister was probably making a big deal out of nothing. "Anna, wouldn't I at least remember getting bitten if it gets as bad as you say?" she asked curiously. She tried to think back over what she had been doing recently, a pinprick sensation, _anything_ , but she couldn't come up with a thing. Elsa abruptly stopped in her tracks and put one hand to her forehead. _I feel a little dizzy all of a sudden…_

Anna noticed what her sister was doing and just picked her up again, this time telling Elsa what she was doing first. "Come on, you little stinker. I'm not letting you be hurt again if I can help it."

* * *

"Princess Anna, your suspicion is correct, but I don't think there is anything I can do that is guaranteed to help," Dr. Raske told Anna a few minutes later. He frowned at the marks on Elsa's arm; already her normally pale skin was growing red and swollen. "Queen Elsa, please be honest. Does the bite hurt?"

Elsa considered the question for a moment and held the affected arm protectively against her chest as she did so. "It _didn't_ , but it's starting to now," she said finally. "A little bit," Elsa added, although it was more like a lot than a little bit.

The doctor just stared at her for a minute and then turned his attention to Anna, knowing the older girl was not going to admit anything else whether it was true or not. Dr. Raske cared about Elsa very much, but she was a terrible patient most of the time. "Princess Anna, _if_ the queen is telling the truth that it just started paining her, she was bitten this morning sometime. That means most likely the culprit spider was in a closet or dresser and it bit her when she invaded wherever it was staying. You should get those places thoroughly scrutinized and cleaned out. Make sure your sister keeps her arm elevated and absolutely no strenuous activity, period."

Anna scowled as she gave Elsa's hand a reassuring squeeze. "What are you gonna do for the bite? I want you to fix Elsa so it won't hurt her so bad like it did to me when I was little." _If Rapunzel were here, she could help Elsa…but Rapunzel said she couldn't come back until summer because her parents were really worried about her…_

"Princess Anna, you know there's nothing else to be done. We don't have any anti-venom materials. All I can do is give your sister painkillers that she probably will refuse to take," Raske told the princess. He paused, a risky idea coming to him. At best, it would cure Elsa instantly; at worst, it would just make the bite much worse. "Queen Elsa, a nasty blister _will_ show up soon, probably before tomorrow. I know your magic can do a lot of things one wouldn't assume ice powers could do…can your powers 'find' the venom and simply destroy it?" he asked. "I don't believe in trying to cut these type of bites to 'let the poison out'…it doesn't work. But your magic…"

Elsa frowned, not quite understanding what the doctor was proposing. How could she heal a poisonous spider bite? She didn't have healing powers; she had ice powers. _Your powers are helping you with your leg,_ a little voice told her. "I don't know if my magic can do that or not," she said finally. "What would happen if I tried to fix it and failed?"

"It would make the bite much worse," Dr. Raske told her honestly. "But if you can excise it with your magic, it would be gone instantly. Queen Elsa, your powers are…pure somehow. They don't have any strange curse attached to them or anything, I know they don't. I don't know _how_ it would work, but I am almost a hundred percent sure there is some way for you to fix it yourself."

"What would happen if Elsa just froze it right off her?" Anna suggested.

Elsa giggled at that. "I _know_ that won't work. I physically wouldn't freeze. I could blast my arm with temperatures hundreds of degrees below zero and nothing would happen at all," she said confidently. _I know that for sure. But wait a minute…if there's spider venom inside me,_ that _would freeze and I'd be fine!_ "I'm going to try the second the blister shows up," she added firmly.

"Queen Elsa, I take no responsibility if that doesn't work," the doctor said in concern. "Please be careful…perhaps I should not have even suggested it… Even if it appears to work perfectly, please either get Gerda or I to take care of the remaining wound. I don't think you can heal it like your cousin can, even though I believe you can get rid of the poison."

Elsa nodded. "Okay. I can do that."

* * *

"Anna, please don't tell Mama and Papa about this," Elsa said quietly as the two of them slowly headed back upstairs. "I don't want them to worry, and I think I can fix it. If there's still an obvious mark after the fact, I'll let Gerda bandage it and my dress will cover it up." _No, it won't. My ice-dress's sleeves are partly see-through…_

"I won't tell them unless you start feeling really horrible," Anna replied after a moment. "And your dress is not either going to cover it up. Not your original ice-dress, anyways. And if you put on one of your non-ice-dresses, Mom and Dad are going to think something is wrong anyways." She gently put her arm around her sister's shoulders when Elsa paused to lean her forehead against the wall. "Come on, sis. You can come lay down in my room so you can get un-dizzy. D'you need me to carry you?"

Elsa stubbornly shook her head and instantly regretted it. "Oh, good grief," she muttered to herself. She scowled but didn't protest when she felt Anna carefully pick her up. _I hate this. How could a little tiny spider cause so much trouble?!_

* * *

 _"Don't_ get up," Anna ordered her sister the second she had laid Elsa down on the bed. "I'm just going to go send a couple of the guards to let stupid ol' Hans and Espen out. They can clean out the closet and the dresser and stuff, 'kay?"

Elsa frowned. "Absolutely not. Those are my personal things, Anna. I'll take care of it myself. Go get Anikka and bring her in here so I can watch her. I don't want her getting bitten too. What you _can_ do is have Hans and Espen clean out all of the empty storage and/or guest rooms in the castle. If there was one spider, there are probably more. Make sure they wear long sleeves and pants and gloves so they don't get bitten either," she instructed. Elsa sighed, forcing herself not to wince at the awful feeling of her bite. It didn't itch so much now; it simply hurt. A lot. _Maybe I can fix it myself now,_ she thought hopefully.

"Only if you promise not to get up," Anna replied, grabbing a few books from a shelf. "If you won't rest, then just sit there and read." She frowned, noticing there was something off about Elsa at the moment. She didn't really look upset, per se, but she had that neutral expression plastered on her face and she was holding the affected arm a bit awkwardly. "Elsa, it's all right to show pain, you know," Anna said quietly as she just gave Elsa a hug.

"I'm fine."

"No you aren't. You don't feel so badly hurt that it's awful terrible, but you are not fine. I can tell. You-what did you say just now, sis?" Anna asked, realizing that Elsa was trying to say something.

"It happened again," Elsa repeated, her blue eyes glaring distastefully at her arm. _I don't have time for this. I have things I need to work on and take care of, not worry about a stupid spider bite. It's not fair. I don't have time to be physically hurt again._

Anna was confused. "What happened again? You never got a bite like that in your life, at least I don't think so." _What's she talking about?_

Elsa kept her eyes glued to her arm, struggling to figure out just how to explain what she meant. "I…I don't know how to explain it. I don't have _time_ for this. It happened _again_. I keep getting hurt and I'm tired of it! I have a job and I have things I need to work on. And…and…" _And I feel like garbage inside and I don't have an explanation as to why. I hate it when I can't explain myself. I really, really hate it._ "I have work to do! I want to help children hurt like I was or worse!" she exclaimed finally. Elsa started to just get up and immediately grew frustrated when Anna tried to make her stay leaning against the pillows. "Anna, stop it!"

Anna yelped when Elsa threw an unexpected snowball at her. "Bad Elsa, you stinker! Don't _do_ that! I'm trying to help. You can't go work right now. You are just going to have to wait and that's that," she said firmly. "You're hurt, and no that's not fair, but you are all the same. So calm down and just rest, sis."

"Stop treating me like I'm a broken piece of glass…even if that's what I feel like. I don't like it!" Elsa paused for a moment, figuring she was probably just going to make Anna fuss over her more by saying that. Part of her wanted to cry, but she did _not_ want to do that. _Holding your feelings in doesn't help, Elsa. Refusing to cry isn't going to make you stop feeling like crying. You're just being ridiculous._ "I just want to be _me_ ," she blurted finally. _Without bad things happening or feeling upset for no reason or anything else like that._ She remembered what Gerda had told her to do for her leg and quickly took her brace off and just dropped it on the floor. _I hate my leg. It's frustrating. And I should be grateful I can walk at all…_

Anna wasn't sure whether Elsa would want a hug or not at the moment, so she simply gave Elsa's hand a reassuring squeeze and plopped down next to her. "You don't take care of yourself and so somebody has to," Anna announced matter-of-factly. "Elsa, don't you think it's a good thing that you 'want to be you'? That means you don't…dislike yourself anymore, right?"

"No. It means I'm frustrated," Elsa said quietly. "I was stuck in that room for thirteen years and I never had a spider in my closet or drawers, at least not that I know of. Why now? Anna, I just want to have some…some calm time without anything out of the ordinary happening…" _I think that's the problem. I don't know._ Elsa gave her little sister a rueful look as she added, "Well, as ordinary as someone like me can be."

 _Maybe Elsa's room was always too cold before? Anyways, it doesn't matter._ "Elsa, just rest for a few hours and then maybe you can fix the bite yourself and then you can go and work on whatever it is you want to work on. 'Kay?" Anna smiled when she realized Elsa had decided to hug her on her own. _Well, at least Elsa isn't all "mad-upset" anymore. Although…she's freezing. Why is she freezing?_

Elsa abruptly jerked away, realizing she was making her little sister shiver. "I'm sorry," she said softly. "Just go, Anna. Please." _I feel lousy besides. And I want to try to fix that bite by myself without anyone in the same room with me just in case I totally mess up._

"Elsa, I'll give you 'alone time' if that's what you need, but you have to explain exactly why you want me to go away first. Ok?" Anna moved over to the frilly chair by her vanity so she could give Elsa some space and still not leave her alone. "And just so you know, I did _not_ move because you were making me cold; I moved so you could have some space without being left alone entirely," she added, just to clarify so Elsa wouldn't think she had chased Anna away.

Elsa thought for a minute, organizing her thoughts before trying to explain what she wanted and why. Then she said simply, "I want you to babysit Anikka, and I want to try to fix the bite on my own by myself. After that, I would very much like your help with my plan because I'm useless to really truly tell if my ice is too cold for normal people to have touching their skin for a bracelet." Elsa was actually fairly certain she could already make ice that felt cool, not cold, but she needed someone else's input to be absolutely sure.

Anna hopped up and gave Elsa a hug before heading to the door. "Ok, sis, I can do that. I'll come back to check on you in thirty minutes, though."

 _I don't need to be checked on,_ Elsa thought, but she just smiled a tiny bit at Anna and then turned her focus to her arm the second Anna had shut the door.

* * *

 _I just have to get my magic to recognize what doesn't belong, right? If I purposely try to freeze the poison out, it'll still be stuck inside me, though. I have to 'sense' exactly what's wrong, and freeze and remove it at the same time._ Elsa bit her lip as she hesitantly flicked one finger at the bite, trying to get her magic to cooperate with what she wanted it to do. She felt a cool pulse of magic go through her affected arm, but that was it. _I don't know how to do this. I really don't. What if I just end up making it worse? We all already know my immune system is bad…that's why I got so sick last December. What if I can't fix the bite, letting it heal normally or with my magic?_ Elsa sighed, unsure what to do. Should she try again and potentially heal it, but risk making it worse; or should she just leave it alone, knowing it would take a long time to go away anyway?

 _It's already going to take forever to heal anyway. How much harm could I do, really? I can't mess it up but so much, right?_ With that logic, Elsa closed her eyes and laid her hand over the bite, ignoring the burning itching feeling that intensified slightly from touching it. "I have to find what doesn't belong," she muttered to herself. On a sudden impulse, she twisted her hand ever so slightly, as if she were taking the lid off a jar. A small swirl of blue magic appeared beneath her hand, and she bit her lip hard when the pain suddenly grew ten times worse. Elsa blinked in confusion as she stared at what she had done. The blistered bite had disappeared, yes, but there was still a rather awful mark left behind, and it still hurt, although not nearly as bad. And her hand felt weirdly numb, which scared her. She still held the swirl of magic with the venom embedded inside it in her other hand, and she had no idea what to do with it. What would happen if she released control on it? Elsa nervously scooted to the edge of the bed, thinking she would just ask Gerda what to do, but then remembered she had taken her brace off. _And of course I have no free hand at the moment to put it back on. Great. Not._

Elsa was still trying to decide what to do when she heard a knock on the door. "Who is it?" she called. She sighed in relief when she heard Gerda's voice saying it was lunchtime. "Gerda, could you come in here, please? I need help."

Gerda was very surprised when she saw Elsa and what she was doing, but she didn't say so. "All right, Miss Elsa, what exactly do you need? Just tell me. Did you try to get rid of that bite on your own?" she asked, noticing that the marks on Elsa's arm were in the same place the bite had been.

Elsa nodded and held out the swirl of magic. "That bite got nasty really quickly…I feel mostly okay now, but the venom is embedded in that magic and I'm not sure what to do with it…" Elsa did not say anything about the numb awkwardness in her other hand. She immediately froze the bit of ice magic solid and dropped it in the bucket Gerda offered her. "Why does Anna have a bucket in her room next to the fireplace?" Elsa asked in puzzlement.

"I have no idea, but she will have to be getting a new one. That one needs to be burned now. Let that ice melt, Miss Elsa. The poison needs to be destroyed so it won't hurt anyone else. Or you could destroy it yourself, most likely. But for now, let's take care of your arm." Gerda frowned when Elsa obviously tried to hold out her arm and didn't quite do so. "Miss Elsa, what exactly did you do to yourself?" she asked quietly. She made no comment as the girl struggled to fasten her brace back on her leg with her free hand, knowing Elsa dearly wanted to do it by herself. After a minute, during which Elsa was obviously growing more and more frustrated, Gerda simply fastened it for her. "Miss Elsa, what exactly did you do to yourself?" she asked again.

"I tried to heal that bite-remove the poison, to be more accurate-and now it's all numb. And tingly." Elsa's face was scrunched up in annoyance as she stood up and tried to shake the feeling back into her arm. She grew tense but didn't complain as Gerda gently guided her out of the room. "Where are you taking me?"

"Your room, so we can bandage the remaining marks. You're bleeding, Miss Elsa. After that, we'll see why it feels 'numb and tingly', although it can't be both. If it feels tingly, it isn't numb, and that's a good sign," Gerda told her.

Elsa stopped short in the doorway to her room, realizing why her arm was feeling strange. That first pulse of magic she'd felt go through her arm hadn't done nothing like she had thought. It had made it so actually fixing the bite didn't hurt quite so much. That was why literally removing the bite and the poison from her arm hadn't really hurt _too_ much. She'd let her magic take most of the feeling out of her arm, which was probably why it wasn't moving properly now…and was turning blue. She grinned as she did the same thing she had done at first. Instantly the numb and tingling sensations disappeared, and she could easily move her arm again. "Gerda, I figured out what was wrong," she announced proudly. "It feels fine now." _And it hurts now too, but I'd rather it hurt than feel numb and not move properly. That scared me._

Gerda shook her head and quickly tended to Elsa's arm. "Now don't you dare touch that bandage. I'll check it again tomorrow for you, so you just leave it alone," she said firmly. She gently took Elsa's hands in hers and looked her straight in the face. "Miss Elsa, I know you hate being fussed over, but you _need_ to rest. Your sister told me what you did…or tried to do…earlier, that you felt dizzy and sick and you still wanted to work. That's hurting yourself, even if you aren't doing it on purpose. Please don't do that." Gerda paused for continuing, "After lunch, I would be very happy if you took a nap, even if it's just for thirty minutes. Then you can work on your plans all afternoon if you want to. Would you be willing to do that, Miss Elsa?"

Elsa hesitated before slowly nodding. "Okay."

"One more thing. Miss Elsa, I think you might want to learn how to take care of bites like that on others, too," Gerda said carefully.

Elsa's blue eyes grew big. _What?!_

 **A/N: So yes, Elsa has limited power to remove poison from a wound. It remains to be seen whether she can help others the same way she helped herself, though.:)**

 **Next chapter coming soon!**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Thanks to everyone who's followed/favorited and/or is reading but not reviewing:)**

 **Olivia O'Neil-Agreed-that wuld be nice, but NOT realistic.:P I'm glad you liked Elsa's new skill she discovered she could do with her powers.:) Elsa's diary will come up again soon-I promise.:)**

 **raven678-I PMed you, so I won't make you reread the same thing here.:)**

 **Elsa Tomago-Kiara's been in Arendelle for MONTHS...since shortly before the Great Thaw, actually.:P Elsa would need very solid confirmation that she wouldn't hurt someone if she tried the same thing on someone else. Which is understandable.:)**

 **On to the story!:)**

Elsa immediately discovered just why Gerda had said she should learn to take care of bites like hers had been. "You _what_?!" Elsa asked Kiara in the hallway, slightly horrified.

"I said I got a spider bite on my ankle. And I want you to fix it," Kiara repeated nonchalantly. Like Elsa, she had been bitten that morning and hadn't noticed it until a few minutes ago when it started hurting her. "Oh yeah, and I want to talk to you about something, if you don't mind."

Elsa bit her lip and backed away, holding her hands protectively close against her chest. _I don't know how to do it for other people! I barely knew how to take care of my own!_ "Kiara, I…I could literally freeze your leg off if I try to do that," Elsa said softly. "I don't know _how_."

"'Least if you do that, you'll numb it in the process," Kiara shot back. "Gerda said you completely got rid of the poison and there was just a regular wound left behind. She told me you could fix it and not to let you go downstairs to eat until you'd done it," she went on, pushing Elsa back into her room.

 _Thanks a lot, Gerda,_ Elsa thought to herself. "I don't want to hurt you," she said, frowning. "What if I mess up?"

"Then I will scream in pain for awhile and after that, I will find you and…and, um…" Kiara tried to think of something that wasn't really all that bad, but Elsa would hate. "I'll disorganize all your paperwork," she said finally. "And…hmm…tell your stuffy parents you want to go skinny dipping." Kiara cracked up laughing when her friend's cheeks turned bright red.

"I do not either!" Elsa protested not so eloquently as she would have liked. "And don't you _dare_ touch my paperwork!" She yelped in surprise when Kiara suddenly gave her a hug. Usually Kiara wasn't the type to randomly give out hugs; she was more apt to be a bit blunt or sarcastic. She just blinked when Kiara added a very sincere 'I trust you'. "Why on earth would you do that?" Elsa whispered, tears threatening to trickle down her cheeks.

Kiara just stared at her. "Because you're trustworthy and you're my friend," she said simply. "That's why."

Elsa didn't cry, but she went over to the window and just stared outside, nervously clasping her hands together. _I don't know how to help Kiara. I don't know how. I can't._

 _Look it up in that magic book, Elsa. That will tell you how to do it, if you actually can. And if it doesn't, then I won't touch it._ Elsa's expression suddenly grew determined as she yanked the book out from under her pillow and began flipping through it. "Kiara, get our lunch brought up here. I know what to do, but it's going to take me a little while. And while I don't want to admit it, I'm hungry."

* * *

A short while later-before the girls' lunch had even been brought upstairs-Elsa had fairly easily fixed Kiara's bite. Like Elsa, Kiara was left with a simple wound that just needed a bandage. It turned out that the _only_ difference was that Elsa couldn't leave someone else's limb 'numb' with her magic for more than a few seconds because it was just plain too dangerous to do so. The book had said that an ice mage's powers would sense the poison on their own and the mage just had to keep a steady, delicate hand to control it. That was it. In fact, Elsa had left her own arm quite a bit more torn up than need be; she did a far more careful job for Kiara's ankle. Elsa actually giggled when she read the fine print footnote at the bottom of the page. "It says this maneuver should be tested on oneself first before attempting it on others. And to not be annoyed if you execute it much better the second or third time," she told Kiara.

Kiara just grinned at the older girl. "Thanks, Elsa. Come on, let's go eat lunch." She paused before saying slowly, "Actually, could I ask you something really quick?"

"Sure."

"Elsa...I...I _love_ it here...you've given me a home and the best friend I've had in my life. But...I don't know...the Southern Isles is my home. I'm the youngest royal kid and the only princess. My parents might accept me better now since I lost my electricity powers." Kiara paused, trying to read her friend's expression. _Elsa, please don't be upset. I need your opinion._ "Do you think I should go back?"

Elsa smiled a bit and looked Kiara right in the eyes. "I think you should go home for a little while and see what happens. If your parents won't let you stay or they're mean or anything else like that, you are welcome to come back. And if everything works out well for you back in the Southern Isles, all I ask is an occasional letter," she finished softly. "I'd love to hear from you once in a while and know for sure that you're all right." _I will not force Kiara to stay here. She's a Southern Isles princess, after all, and my friend second._ "Just let me know whenever you want to leave and I will arrange passage for you, whether it be riding Linnae or a ship or my ice-copter or anything else." She frowned, realizing something. "Although I think a ship would be best knowing your family doesn't take kindly to magic. Does that sound like a plan?"

Kiara nodded and grinned. "Thanks, Elsa!"

* * *

Elsa spread her ice samples for her experiment out on the coffee table in the library late that evening. All were identical except for one. "Now you three will come back in here one at a time and tell me which one just feels cool and not cold, okay?" she told Anna, Kiara, and Anikka. _If this works, I can start really, truly enacting my plan._

Anna opened her mouth to say something and then thought better of it. _I promised Elsa I wouldn't bother her about her leg. I won't say anything._ She knew Elsa didn't like anyone bringing attention to her bad leg, even though Elsa usually didn't say so. Right now Anna was very tempted to remind Elsa that Gerda had told her not to wear her brace while she was sitting down, but Elsa looked perfectly content at the moment and Anna didn't want to make her upset.

"Kiara, Anikka, I'll call you when it's your turn," Elsa called. She waited until Kiara and Anikka had left the room before talking to Anna. "Anna, why d'you keep staring at my leg?" she asked quietly. "Don't say you weren't; I know you were. But you usually ignore it. So why are you doing that?"

"You told me Gerda said you were supposed to take it off whenever you were sitting somewhere and you're sitting somewhere and you didn't," Anna blurted. "Did you forget?" She quickly ran her fingers over each of Elsa's samples of ice and picked up one. "This one, Elsa. This one doesn't feel cold."

Elsa smiled a bit-that was the one she had hoped Anna would pick. Now she just hoped the others would pick it too. She hesitated before addressing Anna's question, wondering what to say. "It looks funny without the brace and I decided I didn't want to see it right now," she said finally, her cheeks turning pink in embarrassment at her explanation. _That's stupid, Elsa. Since when do you really care about what you look like?_

Anna put her hands on her hips and just scowled at her. "What do you mean, 'it looks funny'? It looks just the same as the other one and just doesn't work properly, Elsa, and I thought-" Anna cut herself off when Elsa just shook her head and slowly took her brace off, her blue eyes shining with tears. She looked like she was begging for Anna not to look at her differently. Anna just plopped down on the sofa and hugged Elsa tightly. "It's ok, Elsa. Really, probably _nobody_ has noticed that until this morning. I mean, I spend loads of time with you and I didn't know. _You_ didn't notice and it's your own leg. Because nobody's paying any attention to it."

"I didn't really care earlier; it explained why I still can't walk right even though I mended all those nerves with my magic, but…I don't know…" Elsa really wasn't sure how to explain herself, even in her own mind, let alone to Anna. She smoothed her skirt back over her legs, trying to just forget about the whole thing. _I'm being stupid. What is wrong with me? Why do I even care?_ "Please don't tell Mama and Papa…please," she whispered. _Please don't treat me any differently._

"I won't tell _anyone_ , cross my heart and hope to die," Anna promised. "Elsa, it doesn't matter. You're still my sweet big sister, just plain Elsa." Although Anna was telling Elsa the truth, some bit of Anna did feel awfully bad for her. Not because one of her legs didn't work properly and looked different than her other one, because it was making her feel bad. _I hate seeing Elsa uncomfortable in her own skin. And I remember something Elsa asked me once…why it was "ok" for her to have something different about her that gave her an extra ability and why it wasn't "ok" for her to have something different about her that took an ability away from her. She didn't understand why I didn't mind her magic-liked it, even-and hated seeing her unable to walk properly._ Thinking about Elsa's question still made Anna squirm a little inside. Was she being prejudiced somehow, even though she didn't mean to? If Elsa didn't have her magic and she still had a hurt leg, would Anna subconsciously somehow think of her differently? Something told Anna that _Elsa_ wouldn't think of _her_ differently if _she_ was the one with the weak leg.

Elsa abruptly pulled away from Anna and scooted to the other end of the sofa. She just stared at Anna, her blue eyes slightly accusatory. "You _feel bad_ for me," she said flatly. It was not a question. _I wish I hadn't explained what was bothering me. Now Anna's going to always treat me funny, even if she doesn't mean to. I'm still…me. My stupid leg doesn't make me dangerous like my magic does. But nooo…Anna likes my magic because it makes me "special". And she thinks my leg makes me messed up or broken somehow and it needs to be fixed._ Elsa realized she was scratching at her arm where it was still hurt, and started biting a fingernail instead. On impulse, she quickly strapped her brace back on her leg, etched a number in each piece of ice on the coffee table, and then just headed for the door. "Just tell Anikka and Kiara to come tell me what number the piece of ice they chose is. I'll be in my room within an hour. Please don't follow me."

* * *

Elsa had intended to just go find Gerda-she wanted a grown-up to talk to she could a hundred percent trust not to judge her or tell anyone else what she said-but she ran into her mother in the hallway right outside her own room instead. "Mama, please…just leave me alone," Elsa said, vainly hoping that Idun would listen.

"You look upset, sweetie. Do you need someone to talk to?" Idun asked, being careful not to invade the girl's space.

Elsa immediately shook her head hard and backed up. "No, I just…I was just…heading to my room. I want to be by myself right now." _You do not either want to be alone, Elsa,_ a little voice reminded her. She turned and ducked into her room and shut the door, but didn't lock it. _Please don't follow me. I don't want to lock that door._

"I'll come to check on you in thirty minutes, sweetie," Idun called from outside the door. _I'll not invade her privacy. I know that's important to her. And Elsa didn't lock the door, so that's good._

Elsa sighed in relief and went to sit on her bed. She took a deep breath before taking her brace off again and sliding herself off the bed, keeping a tight grip on the bedpost. "Please work," she whispered to herself. "Please…" _I don't even care if I have to hold on to something; I just want something that tells me I might get better eventually._ Almost immediately she crumpled to the floor when she tried to put weight on her bad leg, and she just sat there and cried. "I just…want…to be… _normal_ …can't deal with…Anna thinking of me…differently, even if…" Elsa's broken voice gave out on her, and she barely registered through her tears what she was doing. Some sad instinct welled up inside her, and she instinctively scratched at her arm, snowflakes tumbling down around her. "I feel… _I don't know…_ "

She didn't hear the chair in the corner pushed aside nor the light footsteps in her room. The someone shushed the little snowman beside them, and just stared at Elsa and what she was doing for a minute in shock. "You should tear up something else besides yourself," a female voice blurted, not in a mean way, just a factual manner.

Elsa nearly jumped out of her skin and instinctively scooted away from the stranger and…Olaf? Was that Olaf? She spotted the open entrance into the secret passages and immediately began feeling sick. Who had figured out how to get in her room via the secret passages?! The girl looked a bit younger than her own self to Elsa; she wore a lot of makeup and a dress that was absolutely scandalous. "Who…who are you?" she asked finally. "And just _how_ did you get in here? Do you need help?" Elsa wasn't stupid; her first thought was that this girl needed help to get away from someone, but she wasn't sure what to say or do.

The girl curtsied to Elsa and then tried to help Elsa to her feet, figuring it was rude to stand while the queen was sitting…on the floor, no less. She had easily deduced that Elsa had something wrong with her leg, but she figured she should just ignore that. She was lucky the queen hadn't immediately frozen her solid for sneaking into her room. "Queen Elsa, your…your snowman Olaf showed me how to get in here through the passages…he said, I quote, 'Elsa'll help you! And your brother! She loves helping people!', unquote. Please, your majesty, you can toss me out if you want, but _please_ help my brother," the girl begged.

Elsa kept one hand clutching the bedpost as she stared at the girl. She could stand up by herself, but since her bad leg wouldn't hold any of her weight, she wasn't very stable. _How does Olaf know about the secret passages, let alone how to get around them without getting lost?_ "Where is your brother, and what is your name?" Elsa asked finally.

"Nikoleta, but my friends call me Niko," the girl replied. _Not that I have friends, really…_ "My little brother is probably in your courtyard. I told him to try to get the guards to let him in, and if it didn't work or you wouldn't have anything to do with us, I'd come back for him," Nikoleta explained. She felt self-conscious in front of Elsa; the older girl didn't look angry, but she did look shocked. And Nikoleta felt bad for seeing Elsa crying and hurting herself when she'd first come in.

"Excuse me for a moment, please," Elsa said. She turned her back and quickly fastened her brace back on her leg; went to rinse off her hurt arm and re-bandage it in the bathroom; and then focused her attention back on Nikoleta. Elsa spotted finger-shaped bruises on Nikoleta's arms and frowned. _Someone's hurting her._ "Who is hurting you, or otherwise…forcing you to do…things?" Elsa asked awkwardly.

Nikoleta flushed bright red, knowing exactly what Elsa's suspicions were. "It's not exactly what you are thinking, Queen Elsa, I promise. I don't do that. I serve drinks at a shady place you probably don't even know about, no offense. Lots of ogling. Nothing else."

"Then who hurt you?" Elsa demanded, pointing at the girl's bruises. "Those are from someone grabbing you. Someone much bigger than you, most likely." Elsa's voice softened a second later when she realized she was scaring Nikoleta. "You are not in any trouble…Niko," she added, giving the younger girl a lopsided smile. Elsa paused and tilted her head to one side, looking critically at Nikoleta's outfit. "Do you _like_ that dress or do you just wear it for your job?" she asked quietly. Elsa personally hated it and thought it looked bad, but she also didn't think it would be fair to force Nikoleta to change clothes. Maybe she didn't have any others.

Nikoleta shrugged but smiled back at Elsa. _She called me Niko._ She had fully expected to be tossed out of the castle, but Elsa had almost immediately accepted her. "I don't care one way or the other about the dress, but it doesn't really matter…I haven't got any others. I just don't like so much makeup. Some looks good, just not so _much…_ " she trailed off, not knowing what to say.

Elsa grabbed one of the many dark blue dresses out of her closet and handed it to Nikoleta. "Take this, Niko. If it doesn't fit, you can sell it or something. Or cut it up and make a cloak. Whatever you like. Go wash all that makeup, or at least most of it, off in the bathroom. It's right there," she said, pointing. "Then we will go find your brother and you need to tell me exactly what is going on." _I can't let her walk around the castle looking like that…Mama and Papa and everyone else would be horrified…_ Elsa put her hands on her hips and frowned at Olaf. "And you have some explaining to do, mister," she scolded.

"I've always known about the cool tunnels! Niko is good at keeping secrets. I watched Eliot lots and her mean dad didn't even know. Their mommy drinks stuff that makes her act funny and sleep all the time," Olaf was only too happy to explain to Elsa where he had been for so long. "And I didn't tell anyone else about the tunnels. I know they're a secret."

Elsa's eyes went wide in shock. _Olaf just brought me two people that need help! I'm not ready to set up my plan yet!_

* * *

A few minutes later, Kai knocked on Elsa's door. "Miss Elsa, were you expecting a visitor? A little boy? He has a note with him that says something about an older sister named Nikoleta?" Kai looked positively confused. "I tried to ask the boy what this is all about, but I couldn't understand him. He's…different."

Instantly Elsa's expression scrunched up in annoyance. _The little boy can't be any more "different" than me…_ "Let the little boy in. Take him to the dining hall and give him some ice cream," she instructed, figuring every little kid loved ice cream. "I will be there in a little bit."

"As you wish, milady." Kai was more confused than ever, but he went to carry out Elsa's instructions.

Nikoleta emerged from the bathroom just then. "The dress didn't fit, Queen Elsa, but thank you for the offer." She looked much different now; she'd washed most of her makeup off and put her hair in a simple but neat bun.

Elsa smiled and handed the younger girl a light cape instead. "This will work better then. Come on, Niko, let's go downstairs. Your brother will be in the dining room eating ice cream, per my instructions."

 **A/N: Nikoleta (yes, spelled differently from Elsa's middle name) and Eliot will NOT take over the story. Promise. Elsa needed some prodding to really get her plans enacted, and I also thought she ought to have a friend fairly close to her age. (And Eliot and Anikka can be friends, too, since they're 7 and 5.:))**

 **And yes, Olaf knew about the secret passages. Elsa did make him, after all, and _she_ knows the secret passages very well.:P**

 **Next chapter coming soon!**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: Thanks to everyone who's followed/favorited and/or is reading but not reviewing:)**

 **Olivia O'Neil-Elsa will be okay, I promise.:) (She always gets a happy ending, period. Eventually.:P)**

 **Elsa Tomago-Nope, not a coincidence. If spiders that bite are hiding in closets/drawers/etc, someone can easily get bitten.:P The catching-the-spider thing is why Elsa gave Hans and Espen the job to start cleaning places out thoroughly.:P Elsa should return the trolls' magic book ASAP...I agree, it's not good for her to rely on something like that for confidence.:/ Kiara is indeed returning to the Southern Isles.:)**

 **raven678-I'm glad you liked it:) Kiara's parents...really, even her country...aren't exactly magic-friendly.:P Eliot and Nikoleta won't really "change the story", per se...but they're certainly a big help to Elsa to get her to really get her project set up.:)**

 **Mandy-Yay, you're back!:) I'm glad you liked Elsa's newly discovered ability:P Kiara knows the Southern Isles is her home, and she does miss her parents. But she also knows Arendelle is a safe place she can return to if need be:) I think that it depends on _why_ you got them corrected-whether it was for you or others. If it was for _you_ , then I think you did the right thing. If not, then I don't think you needed to, but I also think it's not something you should fuss at yourself over.:) Lol, mommy Elsa seems 100% in-character for her to me. She's loving and caring and just...yeah.:) And yes, Elsa's leg WILL eventually get better.:) And you're welcome:)**

 **On to the story! (Yikes, it's ONE IN THE MORNING here...why am I even awake...? *yawns*:/)**

Elsa dearly wished she didn't have to use the stairs in front of Nikoleta; it was bad enough when her family saw her walking up or down stairs. "I do apologize for being so slow," she said when they were about halfway down the stairs. If she just used her magic to get downstairs, then that didn't look professional. If she struggled to walk downstairs, then it was only too clear that she could not walk properly.

Nikoleta hesitated before asking simply, "May I have permission to say something that's probably a bit…not my place?" Elsa nodded, so Niko continued, "I don't know exactly what happened to you, Queen Elsa, but you should not feel like you have to apologize for something like that. _Especially_ you. You don't owe anyone an apology for something about yourself, ever. You're the queen, for goodness sakes. I don't think anyone owes anyone an apology for a physical difference that's just part of 'em anyway."

Elsa slipped a bit on the next stair, and was happily surprised when Nikoleta didn't automatically try to catch her. _Elsa, you're being ridiculous. She didn't try to catch you because you're the queen, not because she knows you can handle the stairs on your own._ All the same, Elsa turned to face the younger girl at the bottom of the stairs. "Why did you not try to catch me when I slipped?" she asked flatly, her blue eyes betraying the real reason she was asking her question.

"You handled the whole rest of the staircase fine, and you didn't almost fall…you just slipped a bit and easily caught yourself. If you had actually fallen, of course I would help you up, Queen Elsa," Nikoleta replied, knowing why Elsa had asked her question. "Besides, it would have been rude for me to try to help you if you hadn't said it was all right to do so." _And I know you didn't want help anyways. You like doing things 'on your own' like my brother does. Only difference is you don't particularly need help all the time, I don't think. Eliot does._ Nikoleta hesitated before adding, "I…I think you should know my brother Eliot has some…physical issues. He's going to get really excited when he finds out Queen Elsa needs a brace on her leg. _Please_ don't be offended…"

Elsa gave Nikoleta a lopsided smile. "That's okay. I'm happy _someone_ would think my brace is a good thing." She grabbed the other girl's hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze, not caring that she probably wasn't supposed to just automatically treat Nikoleta as a friend instead of simply one of her subjects who needed help. "You two are safe here. I have a fairly clear idea of what goes on at your house from what Olaf told me. I'm not forbidding you to return to your job-that's your business in my opinion-but I can easily help you find a better one. I don't think teenage girls need to be working somewhere like what you described. And _no one_ deserves to be…abused," Elsa finished, her eyes bright with tears. "I can and will help. I have a project in progress already that I think would help both you and Eliot."

Nikoleta bit her lip as she reached into her pocket and offered what little money she had to Elsa. "I don't have enough money to pay for Eliot to stay here, your majesty," she said slowly. "My mom probably won't even notice that we're gone, but my dad will come looking for us…he might try to hurt you if he thinks you're helping us, and he'll probably take me home. I…I'm not sure why I brought Eliot here; I just…I don't know…just…can I work off room and board for Eliot somehow? I don't want him around our parents anymore. They're either mean to him or they ignore him, and-"

"Even a job like what you described pays more than that," Elsa interrupted, refusing to accept Nikoleta's money. "Are you the only one making money in your family, Niko?" she asked, already sure of the answer. When Nikoleta nodded, Elsa balled her hands into fists, her blue eyes flashing in anger. "And that money ends up being spent on…drinks and frivolities that you and Eliot don't have any part of?" _That is not fair. That's horrible! And I knew there were other kids in Arendelle that needed help. Nikoleta and her brother are probably just two out of many._

 _Maybe Nikoleta will be my friend,_ Elsa thought hopefully.

 _Don't be stupid, Elsa. Nikoleta came to you because she needed help, not to be friends with you._ Elsa took a deep breath before explaining her immediate plans. "Niko, firstly, you two are staying here tonight. Tomorrow I will come with you to your house so I can talk to your parents. I'll not have parents treating their children like that in my country. Eliot will stay here safe and sound while the two of us do that."

"Queen Elsa, I think you might want to meet Eliot first before committing to that," Nikoleta said hesitantly. "He doesn't cause a ton of trouble, but…I don't know…"

Elsa was unfazed. Little kids were not one of the things that scared or unnerved her, unless it was because she thought she might hurt them. "Well, I shall have to meet him right this second then. I _will_ help the two of you."

* * *

After all the fuss Nikoleta had made that Eliot wasn't 'normal', Elsa wasn't sure what to expect when she headed into the dining hall. Kai pulled her aside so neither of the visitors could hear what he said. "Miss Elsa, the bit I can understand from the child tells me the plans you're working on to protect abused children needs to get implemented as soon as possible," Kai told her quietly.

Elsa nodded. "I know. Let me talk to little Eliot. I'd like to meet him," she replied. _I don't care what's 'wrong' with this child; I just want him and his big sister to be safe and happy._ As Elsa walked over to the table, she realized that Eliot had immediately noticed her limp and was staring intently at her, not in a judging way, just curiously. She sat down next to the child and just said hello and asked if he liked his ice cream.

Eliot nodded and awkwardly gestured at Elsa's leg. "'ike…me?" he asked, smiling excitedly. Eliot struggled to push himself away from the table and stand up. "I…'m se…en," he added.

Elsa didn't understand why Nikoleta had thought she might not want to commit to letting Eliot stay at the castle. Sure, she could tell he could barely walk, even with braces and crutches, and he obviously couldn't talk well, but all Elsa saw was a little kid who needed a safe place to stay. _He said 'like me?' and then 'I'm seven'. I'm positive._ "Maybe a little bit," she replied after a moment. "I do have to wear a brace similar to yours on my left leg, see?" A delighted smile spread across Elsa's face when she realized she had made Eliot happy. _I made him happy! Me. I did that._

What Elsa didn't know was that Eliot wasn't just happy because she had a bad leg; it was because she had understood what he said and she hadn't told him to try again or that he sounded funny. Or made that 'sorry, I don't understand and I feel bad for you' face even nice people usually made. "Ni…ko…sa…said…y'…hel'…s?"

Elsa thought for a moment, trying to decipher Eliot's words. "I'm sorry…I'm not _completely_ sure what you said. Was it 'Niko said you would help us'?" Elsa asked, repeating what she was fairly certain the little boy had meant. Eliot nodded and didn't look the least bit upset at Elsa's question, and Elsa relaxed. _So Eliot won't be upset if I ask him to confirm what he tried to say. Okay. That's good to know._ "Well, your sister is right. I'll most certainly help both of you. Niko and I have decided you get to stay here for now. You're safe here. No mean daddies or mommies," she assured the child. "You can play outside or read books or whatever else you like."

Elsa yelped in surprise when the child suddenly collapsed and hugged her and began crying. _What did I do wrong?! What did I do?_ She looked frantically towards Nikoleta for help.

"He's used to people, especially strangers, just automatically judging him, even if they're trying to be nice. They think he's stupid because he can't talk well," Nikoleta told her in a slightly bitter tone. "And you just offered him books to read like you might any average seven-year-old instead."

Elsa scowled. "That isn't fair. I can tell easily there's nothing wrong with Eliot's mind. And even if he _was_ a bit…slow, I would still offer books. Books are interesting, and even if someone couldn't read, they could look at the pictures at least." She hugged little Eliot protectively, angry that people would treat him like that. _Never again. Not in my castle._

* * *

Elsa frowned when she looked up to see Olaf leading a parade of people into the dining hall a minute later. _Great, just great. Mama, Papa, Anna, Kristoff, Kiara, Anikka, and Gerda. Why did Olaf have to do that?_ "Well, hello, everyone…this is Nikoleta and Eliot. They will be staying here tonight," she said firmly, giving her parents a meaningful glance. _Don't you dare say anything. Not in front of them._

"Now Elsa, you already let-" Agdar started to say, but this time Elsa didn't just listen in silence.

"Papa, _no_. Not this time," Elsa interrupted quietly but firmly. "I can handle this. This I can do." _There are lots of things I can't handle on my own, but this is not one of them._ She glanced at her own arm, knowing she _should_ probably ask for help regarding that…she shouldn't have hurt herself on purpose. Elsa thought for a moment before adding, "Everyone out except Gerda, Nikoleta, and Eliot. Everyone out." _I wouldn't mind Anna or Anikka staying, but I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings. So everyone has to go._

Elsa sighed in relief once everyone else was gone. "Gerda, this is Nikoleta," she said, introducing Nikoleta to Gerda. "She says she'd rather be called Niko, though. Niko brought her brother Eliot here because their parents don't treat them properly. Could you arrange a guest room for them, please, and take Eliot upstairs? Niko and I need to talk by ourselves."

Nikoleta hesitantly cleared her throat. "Um…Queen Elsa, Eliot can't walk up the stairs by himself…maybe I oughta help?"

Elsa frowned, but then her face suddenly lit up as an idea she dearly wished she had come up with ages ago popped into her head. _The cylinder-shaped area within the spiral staircase…I could just make a platform there that carries people or furniture upstairs without having to actually walk up all those stairs. The…hmm, what to call it…_ elevator _…could just work with a button like my ice-rides did last summer. Actually, no, not like that…it needs to be able to operate without me being right there with my magic…_ "Niko, that won't be a problem. I have an idea."

* * *

After a few minutes tinkering with her new construction, Elsa decided she would just need to experiment a bit before trusting herself to leave something like an ice elevator to operate by itself. "Well, my new ice elevator is safe to ride in, but at the moment it needs me to run it," Elsa said regretfully. "But it _is_ safe." She touched the snowflake-shaped button to send it upstairs the second the four of them were standing on the platform.

"Miss Elsa, you should have done this for yourself months ago," Gerda said, not the least bit surprised with the girl's creation. "Not to mention it is exceedingly convenient."

Nikoleta just stared in shock. She had heard a lot of stories about the young queen's magical powers, but it was very different seeing them up close. And she knew the only reason Elsa had made the weird elevator thing was for her little brother. _Why_ didn't _she make something like this for herself? It obviously wasn't particularly difficult for her to do…she really just never thought of it until a few minutes ago?_

Eliot just looked excited. His older sister had told him Queen Elsa had ice powers, but like Nikoleta, he thought they were _amazing_ up close. And he had already decided that he liked Elsa as a person very much. She seemed friendly; and besides…if Elsa couldn't walk properly _and_ she got to be queen, then maybe he could do something when he was older, too.

Elsa's cheeks turned pink; she hated people staring at her even when she knew those people were just surprised. She caught Gerda frowning at her arm and instantly hid it behind her back…and wished she hadn't. _Great job, Elsa. Now Gerda will_ really _think something's wrong. How does she know anyways? My dress has long sleeves…_

* * *

Elsa took Nikoleta to the library while Gerda showed Eliot to a guest room. "Niko, I'm working on an…ongoing project to try and help abused children. And teenagers," she added, figuring Nikoleta probably wouldn't want to be called a child. Elsa asked the younger girl to pick the piece of ice that merely felt cool, and was reassured when Nikoleta chose the same piece Anna had earlier. _Okay, that means I must have done it correctly. Now for that contact crystal thing…it needs to react only to Niko's voice. It'll automatically respond to me; I'm the 'central' station for any ice crystals I make._ "Please don't…freak out," she said quietly, half to herself and half to Nikoleta. Elsa closed her eyes and concentrated on the small glowing object forming in her hands. _Elsa, the crystal's done. You can stop now._ She smiled as she looked down at the translucent light blue crystal in her hand and then looked to Nikoleta. "This will be yours. Just take it and tell it your name and age so it will only work for you and no one else."

Nikoleta seemed puzzled, but she did as Elsa told her to do. "Nikoleta Dahler, age 17." Instantly the little crystal glowed for a moment before returning to normal.

Elsa bit her lip, hoping with all her heart that the contact crystal was now working correctly. "Okay…now we need to test it, just to make sure it works," she said slowly. "Could you please go find your brother? Once you do, just say something directly to the crystal and, assuming everything's working properly, I'll get your message and be able to find you." _I really, really hope this works…_

* * *

After a few tests with no mistakes, Elsa told Nikoleta and Eliot good-night and gave Eliot a contact crystal of his own. Both Nikoleta and Eliot had been all too eager to let Elsa put their crystals on an irremovable bracelet of Elsa's ice that merely felt cool. Elsa sighed in relief that her plan was working. _Maybe Niko would be willing to help with the rest of my plan. I could pay Niko for doing so and she could do that instead of her other job…_ Elsa's thoughts were abruptly cut off when Gerda just marched right up to her and frowned at her in that loving but disapproving manner Elsa easily recognized. "Gerda, what did I do wrong this time?"

"It is most likely not what you're thinking, Miss Elsa. I think you're doing a wonderful thing, helping people like you're doing," Gerda assured her. "May I see that arm of yours, please?" _I know she did something to herself; she was acting a little…off about it. Elsa needs help._

Instantly Elsa's gaze grew worried, and she clasped her hands together behind her back to get the hurt area out of sight. "Why?" Elsa asked, in what she hoped was a nonchalant manner. "There's just t-the remaining marks from the s-spider bite…" _Great job, Elsa. Very convincing. Not. You are terrible at lying. Which is a good thing, since you hate lying with a passion._ Elsa could feel her breathing getting out of her control, and she tried to duck into her room so she could try to handle the problem on her own. _Why am I so scared of Gerda finding out what I did?! She wouldn't judge me for that; I know she wouldn't. She wouldn't even tell anyone if I asked her not to._

Gerda immediately noticed the beginnings of one of the young queen's 'episodes', and she simply followed Elsa into her room. "Miss Elsa, I am going to give you a hug," Gerda said quietly, not wanting to make Elsa any more uncomfortable than she already was. "Now you are going to calm yourself down like I know you can."

Elsa didn't resist, resigned to the fact that Gerda was going to find out about what she had done anyways…it was just a matter of time. After letting herself calm down for a few minutes, she stepped backwards away from Gerda and exposed her arm, not quite able to meet Gerda's gaze. Elsa's cheeks had turned bright pink with embarrassment and she felt like she was about to cry, unsure as to why. _Elsa,_ stop it. _You're being stupid; you shouldn't have done that in the first place. You didn't even have a logical reason for doing that in the first place. See, you mess things up. You even mess yourself up._ Elsa bit her lip hard and forced herself not to cry. She would not cry for no reason; she just wouldn't.

"Miss Elsa, why did you do that?" Gerda asked, gently replacing the bandage over the scratches and fingernail marks on and around the original bite on Elsa's arm. She frowned when Elsa just shrugged and said nothing. "There has to be a _reason_ , Miss Elsa. Something had to have triggered you to do that. What was it?"

"I don't know." _Well, I sort of know, but I still don't understand why. I didn't really consciously decide 'oh, it's a good idea to hurt myself'. It was sort of conscious and sort of not._ Elsa held her hands clasped together close against her chest, not knowing how to explain herself.

"All right, then what were you thinking and feeling right before you did it?" Gerda was determined to get the explanation out of Elsa, no matter how silly it seemed to the girl.

Elsa's gaze flitted to her braced leg and her eyes filled with tears again. This time she couldn't stop the tears from trickling down her cheeks. "It…it's dumb. Really, really dumb. Anna…she's seen my leg. The way it looks. She asked me why I hadn't taken my brace off 'cause I was sitting and I said it looked funny and I didn't want to see it and I ended up showing her and…and…Gerda, why's it okay I have magic and it's not okay I have a crippled leg? I mean, if I'd _always_ had a bad leg and never knew anything different, I don't think it would bother me so much. I probably wouldn't care at all. It's just…Gerda, I want t' be _normal._ Like An-"

"No, like you," Gerda interrupted. She hugged Elsa tightly and then led her over to the wardrobe. "Miss Elsa, go run in the bathroom and put this on really quick. I just want you to see something," Gerda added, handing Elsa the silvery white knee-length ice-dress with the crystal spaghetti straps Elsa had made not too long ago.

"But it'll show my stup-"

"I don't care. That's the point," Gerda said firmly. "Nothing private shows; I've seen you in it." Gerda still thought Elsa's fashion designs tended to be a bit scandalous to say the least, but she had also noticed that even when the sleeves disappeared and the skirts grew shorter, Elsa still made sure everything private stayed that way.

When Elsa came back wearing the silvery dress, Gerda quickly tugged her over to the full-length mirror and just crossed her arms. "Now you are going to tell me everything that you think is wrong with you, inside and out. Everything."

 **A/N: Well, Elsa has successfully made two contact crystals, and Gerda's trying to help Elsa feel better now.:)**

 **Next chapter coming soon!**


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: Thanks to everyone who's followed/favorited and/or is reading but not reviewing!**

 ** _Firstly, I am SO SORRY for the late update, and that I still haven't posted a new chapter on the story about little Elsa. My laptop computer's charger broke and I just got the new charger.:/_**

 **raven678-Lol, I think it would have been OOC for Elsa not to help Nikoleta and Eliot.:P Well, what Gerda's trying to do to help Elsa will happen in this chapter.:)**

 **Elsa Tomago-Elsa still should take someone with her when she goes to Nikoleta's house. Yes, Elsa can easily defend herself, but she still should bring 'backup'.:) Yep, everything'll be fine soon.:)**

 **Olivia O'Neil-Thank you!:) Thanks also for the feedback about chapter length. I'm always worried chapters are too long or too short.:P**

 **Mandy-Elsa's mostly okay; she just got really upset and it triggered her. (Also she wasn't attempting suicide; she "just" hurt her arm on purpose.) I just think there's no way Elsa is 100% okay, especially not after everything that's happened to her recently. She's not good at dealing with her emotions anyway, and a bunch of extra stress does NOT help.:/ It's sad to really think about, but there isn't really any way for her to _ever_ be the girl she could have grown up to be if she'd been treated properly. Elsa can't just automatically "fix" her emotions. She's 21, but inside part of her is still that little girl.:/ Grr. Anyways, all the same, Elsa WILL be okay, and she WILL get better. I promise.:) You're welcome-I tried to be 100% honest.:) One reason Elsa didn't create her elevator sooner is because...well, I didn't think of it.:P And besides, she tends not to do things to 'only' help herself. Thank you.:) I'm just writing things that seem in-character with the story-verse and also...things that I personally think would be relevant in real life. I don't want to be "that author", the one that hits their readers over the head with Good And Important Messages For Real Life, though.:P Elsa's contact crystal bracelets are her world's version of a phone hotline...only Elsa's bracelets actually let her physically help people, not just talk to them:) Yes, Elsa will be bringing someone with her when she visits the kids' parents. And she will be fine.:) It's okay-I took ages with this update.:P**

 **On to the story!**

" _Everything_? That might…take a long time," Elsa muttered, scowling at her reflection. _Why is Gerda having me do this? I don't understand…_

"I don't care, Miss Elsa. Everything."

Elsa sighed and began staring at the floor.

"No, Miss Elsa, you look in the mirror the whole time. Say whatever these negative things are directly to your reflection, like you're saying them to another girl."

Elsa lifted her gaze and just bit her lip. _I don't understand why Gerda is having me do this. Still…this is easy. I know what's wrong with me…_ "Elsa can't handle emotional pain. She cries too easily, and ends up doing stupid things like hurting herself or attempting s-suicide. She's still scared of hurting someone should she lose control. Elsa can't deal with crowds very well. You have panic attacks and-" Elsa paused, realizing something. _Most of those things aren't my fault!_

 _Yes, they are._

"Go on," Gerda said quietly.

"And you're a burden on everyone around you. You're not the perfect daughter your parents always wanted-you're just a…a d-defective worthless freak. Something you could throw away and not need anymore." Elsa watched in the mirror as the 'other' Elsa blinked her sad blue eyes. _Is that really what you think of me, or are you just saying what important people made you feel like?_ "You're abnormal and dangerous. You can't even consistently control that magic. And you can't even walk properly because you have a crippled leg. You look too young to be queen, and your hair is weird and your skin is way too pale. You m-mess up things and then d-don't know how to f-fix them." Elsa crumpled to the carpet and just started to cry, not knowing what else to say. _And I'm proving what I just said…_

Rather than hug the distressed girl, Gerda simply pulled her back to her feet and forced her to look back in the mirror. "Now, Miss Elsa, just look at the girl in the mirror. Right now she's not you; she's just someone you know who's just been bullied. What do you tell her; what do you tell the bully; and what do you think of this girl?"

Elsa tilted her head to one side in confusion, not sure what to say. She was supposed to _defend_ herself? Make herself feel better? Elsa made a face, knowing what Gerda was trying to do. "Gerda, you are just trying to mess with my stupid head psychologically," she said a bit peevishly.

Gerda merely nodded. "Yes, I am. I'm going to make you see what utter ridiculousness that little head of yours thinks up sometimes, Miss Elsa. Now please go on."

"Well…first I would ask her if she minded a hug," Elsa said reluctantly. _This is silly…and I should just cooperate. I know Gerda's just trying to help._ "Then… Everyone's his or her own normal, including you. Including your magic and your bad leg. You're not the perfect daughter your parents always wanted because _no one_ is perfect and because your daddy was…mean. You're just introverted; and as far as the panic attacks and the crying go, that's 'cause you were…hurt as a kid. That's not your fault and it just means you need help. And you _might_ be a burden to everyone around you, but…" Elsa paused and looked to Gerda for help. That was one thing she just couldn't talk herself out of, and so she couldn't "help" the 'other' Elsa feel better from that comment.

"It's all right, Miss Elsa, just move on," Gerda said quietly, giving her a reassuring smile. _So feeling like she's a burden is something Elsa genuinely can't talk herself out of logically. That's something she needs help with._

Elsa sighed and turned back to her reflection. "You shouldn't attempt suicide or hurt yourself on purpose, but hurting yourself is better than suicide, at least. And I…I don't know if you're something you can throw away and not need anymore, but you do have people that love you. You're not worthless or defective, either." She paused and then moved on to Gerda's second instruction. "Bullying people, even yourself, is _wrong._ Doing that to someone who's already hurting just makes it all that much worse. So stop it or I'll..I'll…take away all your chocolate for all eternity." Elsa actually giggled a little at that comment. _I just made myself giggle. That's a good thing._

"Now say what you think of this other girl," Gerda instructed, her voice remaining completely calm, not wanting to let Elsa know that she was actually upset by Elsa's words. _Elsa can't even let herself believe that she's genuinely needed. I thought she would at least admit it partially…_ "Remember she's _not_ you; she's some other girl you've talked to."

"She needs hugs," Elsa stated with great certainty. Then she thought for a minute before continuing, "But not because she's messed up on the outside…because she's all sad and frightened and in pain inside. She's actually rather pretty if you get past the extremely pale skin and platinum colored hair. She has nice blue eyes, but they're too big for the rest of her. And she's too skinny, but I wouldn't care as long as I was sure it wasn't because she wasn't eating. I'd be curious about the brace on her leg; and if she explained why it didn't work properly, I'd be worried if it hurt her or something, but beyond that, I wouldn't think much of it…and her magic…I'd think the same. Curious; slightly worried, and then nothing much after that. Those are just physical differences. I'd be happy I'd made a friend that I could tell a secret to and she wouldn't tell anyone. I think I'd be a _little_ wary about the potential dangers of her ice powers, but I wouldn't dislike her or avoid her because of it. I…I guess that's it?" Elsa turned back to Gerda, hoping she had said the right things. _I probably sounded like an idiot…_

* * *

Gerda took Elsa by the hands and gave them a comforting squeeze. "So, Miss Elsa, you don't think that girl's braced leg that allegedly 'looks funny' makes her ugly or otherwise less of a person, do you? Or because of her magic?" she asked gently. When Elsa slowly shook her head, Gerda added, "Do you _really_ think your sister thinks less of you because of your leg?" Gerda had easily deduced what had happened; at the very least, Elsa had simply gotten this idea in her head that Anna thought differently of her somehow.

Elsa frowned and bit her lip as she mulled over Gerda's question. "I…I don't know. It's just…when Anna saw the way it looked, she looked at _me_ differently," she explained slowly. "She said she didn't care, and I do believe that she's not going to be mean to me or anything because of it; but she…she looked at me funny. Like she felt bad for me. That _hurt._ I showed Anna 'cause I trusted her not to treat me funny…I just…I just want to be _me_. I don't want to be pitied or treated differently because I have a damaged leg. Anna doesn't treat me differently because of my powers." _Gerda, please understand. I don't know how to explain myself; it barely makes sense even to me._ "It's like…like extra abilities are okay and missing ones aren't. Subconsciously, somehow."

Gerda thought for a long time before replying. "Miss Elsa, if you could get rid of your magic right this moment, would you do so?"

"No," Elsa replied instantly. "It helps protect Arendelle, and it's free defenses…we don't have to pay anyone to use it."

Gerda smiled at her and just hugged her tightly. "All right, what about if you did not have any responsibility to do that?"

This time Elsa hesitated. _Would I get rid of my powers under those circumstances?_ She remembered all those horrible years isolated in her room.

She remembered her little girl self before the accident playing happily with Anna.

She remembered building her ice palace on the North Mountain.

She remembered her father calling her defective for something she had never asked to have.

"I don't know," Elsa replied finally. Elsa's blue eyes were bright with tears as she made her signature snowflake in one hand and just stared at it. _I really do love my snowflake. I just hate a lot of things my powers caused._ "If I could, I'd…I'd make it so Papa ac-accepted m-me before. Maybe I wouldn't be so…messed up inside anym-more." The snowflake fell to the floor as Elsa hid her face in her hands and just cried. She could feel her bad leg starting to hurt because she was so upset, but she ignored it.

Gerda ignored the snowflakes floating around Elsa and simply guided her to bed so she could lay down. "Shh, Miss Elsa, it's all right. It's not your fault," she told Elsa firmly. Gerda held the girl still when she tried to curl in on herself. "Miss Elsa, listen to me. We _will_ get this straightened out. I promise. I know you don't believe it right now, but you are _not_ a burden, and you are _not_ something you can 'throw away and not need anymore'."

"Papa called me a burden when -" Elsa started to say.

"I don't care, Queen Elsa, I do not care. That was years and years ago; he was horribly wrong then and it's horribly wrong now, too. That man is a stubborn prejudiced idiot sometimes, but I know he loves you, at least now." Gerda gently brushed Elsa's tears away and fluffed her pillows. "Why don't you get that brace off and go to sleep now? I'll stay with you until you get to sleep if you want me to, Miss Elsa."

Elsa obliged, but rather than curling up under the covers, she scooted close to Gerda, wanting to be held, although she didn't say so. _Elsa, why can't you just snap out of it? Gerda needs to go to sleep herself; it's late._

Gerda easily knew what Elsa wanted, and she just hugged her close. "You are going to be fine, Miss Elsa. I'll not try to force you to promise not to hurt yourself again; but should that happen again, _please_ tell someone. Better yet, tell someone that you feel like doing so and distract yourself with something else. Also I will talk to your sister tomorrow…perhaps you misunderstood her. And if not, we can find out why."

"Gerda, do…d'you "feel bad" for me because of my leg?" Elsa asked in a small voice. _Please say no. Please._

"No, but I "feel bad" for you because it makes _you_ feel bad. Miss Elsa, you are still the same girl I've known for twenty-one years. Why should an injured leg change that?" Gerda genuinely just wanted the best for Elsa and for her to be comfortable in her own skin; she loved Elsa very much no matter what was 'wrong' with her. "Tell me this, Miss Elsa. What did you think when you met that little boy Eliot, who's quite a bit worse off than you are?"

Elsa smiled a bit at that question. "I was happy that seeing me with my brace made Eliot happy. I guess I just saw a little kid who liked ice cream and happened to need help. Not 'cause of messed up legs or anything, though. Because of bad parents." Elsa thought for a moment, thinking that Eliot may not have been as excited to meet her if it hadn't been for her damaged leg. If she _did_ manage to heal her leg, was that fair to someone like that little boy? Maybe having to wear that brace was a good thing if it made someone else happy. She could just try to deal with people she trusted thinking of her differently. "Gerda, I still want to try to fix my leg, but I won't be upset if we can't. Feeling upset about it would be selfish and wrong."

"Miss Elsa, why exactly do you want to heal it?" Gerda asked quietly. "Please be honest; I am not going to tell anyone."

"So Mama and Papa will like me better. Then they'll think I just have one thing physically wrong with me instead of two." _Even though I know they really do care about me, I know they would both be very happy if I wasn't…different._ Elsa hesitated, wondering if she should really say the rest of what she was thinking. _Just tell Gerda, Elsa. She's not going to judge you._ "Gerda, if I could choose, I would have two legs that always worked properly so I could run and go ice skating and just…walk without worrying I might fall. But…I don't know…I _am_ used to having a weak leg now; it doesn't really bother me anymore. I don't like it, but it's okay. And seeing that it actually made a little kid happy made _me_ happy. I guess…I guess I feel like I genuinely do want to fix it for _me_ , but it's mostly just because I want Mama and Papa to like me better. And I feel like even Anna would be happier to have someone like me for a sister if I didn't have a weak leg."

"Those are not good reasons, Miss Elsa. The _only_ good reason is for you, and only you. If you try to fix it so certain people will 'like you better', you're just going to end up hurting yourself inside instead. And you _are_ a beautiful girl whether you think so or not, both inside and out. Anyone who can't see that is an idiot. What I see when I look at you is a loving, intelligent young girl. She's a bit mischievous sometimes when she's happy; and if she's sad or scared, she just needs a large portion of tender loving care. Neither your magic nor your bad leg defines you. That's utterly ridiculous. What defines you is what's in here," Gerda said gently, pointing to Elsa's heart. "Nothing else."

Elsa gave Gerda a lopsided smile as something else popped into her head. "Besides, couldn't I say that since I have an extra ability _and_ a missing one, they cancel each other out?" Elsa's big blue eyes lit up at that deduction. "That would mean I _can_ be normal like Anna, wouldn't it?" _Elsa, that's silly. Everyone's supposed to be their own 'normal'. Normal is an unfair ridiculous concept._

Gerda sighed and tried her best not to make a face. "While I'm happy that idea might make you feel better, that still isn't fair to you. Calling certain things 'normal' isn't fair to anyone and you know it." A sudden idea struck her, and she frowned as she asked, "Miss Elsa, does this concern that Anna thinks of you 'differently' have anything to do with what Jade made her act like not so long ago?"

"I…I don't know. Maybe?" Elsa sighed as she mulled over Gerda's question. _Gerda is probably right…I know I've wondered how much of that was real-Anna and how much was villainized-Anna. Because those things villainized-Anna said_ were _rooted in truth. That hurt so much…_

"One other thing. Do you realize now how horribly you treat yourself? When you talked to the 'other Elsa' in the mirror, that 'other Elsa' is what everyone else sees. Not the awful picture you've constructed of yourself in your head. You downright bully yourself constantly, and that's wrong. That Bible verse 'Love thy neighbor as thyself'? Well, you need to reverse that sometimes. You love everyone else and not _you._ " Gerda gave one of Elsa's hands a reassuring squeeze. "Miss Elsa, I know you feel otherwise, but you _do_ deserve love and care. You _do_." She hesitated before continuing, "And absolutely _none_ of this is your fault. Pardon me for saying so, but there's still a hurt child inside you who never grew up to be able to think differently. The rest of you is a young adult, but your heart isn't. That's all right, though-you're still just plain Elsa, no matter what."

Elsa's expression scrunched up in confusion. "I should treat myself like…like I treat Anikka?" she asked in puzzlement. "Wait…where is Anikka?! I'm s'posed to be taking care of her, and I _lost_ her; I don't know where-"

"Miss Elsa, she's fine. She's with your sister, remember? You didn't lose her. Do you want me to go get her for you?" Elsa immediately nodded, and Gerda quickly went to fetch the little girl.

A few minutes later, Gerda laid a fast asleep Anikka next to Elsa and then gave the older girl one last hug. "I'll talk to your sister for you, and then you two can discuss things yourselves tomorrow. I will not let you get so upset again, Miss Elsa. This time you have help."

"Thank you, Gerda," Elsa said sleepily. She tossed one arm around Anikka and just held her protectively. _I'm glad I have Gerda…I don't know what I would do without her._

Anikka woke up and just scooted closer to Elsa. "I love you. You make me happy," the little girl announced, and promptly fell back asleep.

* * *

DOWN THE HALL…

"Miss Anna, what exactly happened when your sister showed you her bad leg earlier?" Gerda asked. "And goodness gracious, you really need to clean up this room! It looks like a tornado came through here."

Anna scowled and flopped down on her tummy across her bed. "It's organized messy," she announced. "And is there something wrong with Elsa again? Did I say something wrong to her earlier? She just up and left for no reason…I dunno why."

"I just talked to her for awhile, and she seems to have this idea you 'looked at her differently' after she showed you her leg. Why do you think she might have thought such a thing?" Gerda was trying her best not to place blame on either sister and just get the facts.

"Oh. Elsa said I felt bad for her like it was a bad thing," Anna replied. "I didn't _mean_ to look at her differently; I swear I didn't. It just sort of…happened. I _did_ feel bad for her. She looked like she was about to cry, and I think she was scared. So I just hugged her and told her prob'ly nobody had noticed anyways. And…and I _know_ Elsa doesn't understand why I like her magic and hate seeing her unable to walk properly, and…yeah. That's what happened."

Gerda sat down next to the princess and thought for a minute before replying. "Miss Anna, your sister just wants to be treated like always. I don't think she's 'messed up' just because she can't walk without a brace on her leg. She doesn't _want_ you to feel bad for her because of that because it makes her feel like she's broken. I know you just want her back the way she was so she doesn't have trouble doing certain things, but all she sees is someone she trusts treating her differently for something she can't control. Why _do_ you like her magic and hate seeing her unable to walk properly? Perhaps you could answer that question and just tell her the truth."

Anna frowned, not knowing how to answer that question. "But I don't know," she mumbled.

"All right, then try this. Do you, in all honesty, think of your sister differently because of her leg?"

Anna's cheeks turned red and she found herself crying. "I think so…but Gerda, I don't wanna be prejudiced. It just…happens. I feel bad for Elsa every time I see her have trouble with the stairs, or the way she sometimes just randomly slips when she walks. Or simply seeing her wearing that stupid brace, period. It makes her limp really bad, and I always remember why she's hurt in the first place. Because she saved me. I mean, I know Elsa's more healed already than any of us ever thought she would be and that's a good thing, but still. She's permanently hurt because she saved me. That isn't fair. I saved Elsa, and I haven't got anything wrong with me. And it makes it worse somehow because she never complains or anything about it…"

"What if Elsa had always had a bad leg as long as you could remember? Would you still feel bad for her?" Gerda asked gently, already fairly certain what Anna's answer would be.

"Maybe a teeny bit, just 'cause I'd wish she could run around with me, but not really. It'd just be part of Elsa and I wouldn't really care," Anna said truthfully.

Gerda gave the princess a reassuring smile. "Then I don't think you're being prejudiced, Miss Anna. It sounds like it has to do with blaming yourself for your sister being permanently injured. You need to tell her that so she'll understand. Right now all she knows is that someone she really, really trusts to always treat her as 'just plain Elsa' isn't doing that."

There was a long silence, and then Anna said, "I think Elsa's still scared somehow that I'll hurt her like I did when Jade poisoned me, even though she knows I won't. She thinks the nasty things I told her were rooted in truth somehow."

"They probably were, Miss Anna," Gerda said quietly. "Whatever that magic was, it most likely pulled out the darkest thoughts you've ever had, even if they were for a split second, and made them worse and multiplied them a hundred times over. But it was _not_ your fault, princess. You're only human, just like anyone else. I'm sure if it had been your sister, she would have ended up doing the same thing. And yes, I know direct magic attacks can't harm her. I meant if that wasn't the case."

* * *

Anna abruptly grabbed Elsa's old diary from under her pillow and just hugged it to her chest. _If Gerda's right, then that means Elsa knows I've thought mean things about her before and she still trusted me enough to give me her diary from when she was little._ She remembered something else, and began sobbing as she clutched Elsa's diary. "Gerda…d'you…d'you remember on the…on the way home when you and Dad rescued us? You…you were holding Elsa, and she tried t-to reach for my hand and I just brushed her off and…Gerda, she was hurting so bad and she still wanted me to help her. And I'd just _hurt_ her, and…" _No wonder poor Elsa is still scared and hurt inside. If she always knew deep inside that villainized-me wasn't me and yet bits of it was, that must have been doubly horrible for her._

"That whole mess was _not_ your fault or hers," Gerda said firmly. "And about your sister's leg being permanently injured because of you, Miss Elsa _chose_ to let herself be hurt instead of you. Just like you chose to sacrifice yourself to save her last summer. Did Elsa have anything to do with that?"

"Well, no. Although she could have just frozen that stupid Hans solid, I guess. But other than that, no, of course not."

"Then how is what your sister did for you any different?" Gerda asked.

"It's not, except that her leg is part of the reason she couldn't escape from that cave on her own," Anna muttered. "Gerda, I still feel rotten for what I did, even if it wasn't really my 'fault'. What if we hadn't been able to bring Rapunzel here to heal her? Those horrid burns prob'ly _still_ wouldn't be gone. What if you and Dad and the guards hadn't shown up when you did? And besides those stupid what ifs, I know for a fact Elsa hasn't completely healed inside from that whole thing. I still see emotional pain in her eyes sometimes. The fresh kind, not the kind that's from when she thinks about being stuck in her room. I just wanna _fix_ her. Fix Elsa so she won't be hurting anymore. Elsa can't just go on living like that." She paused for a moment before continuing, "And it's not fair! Elsa _never_ did anything to deserve that, never ever. But nooo, she just keeps being hurt over and over! It isn't fair!" Anna's voice dropped to a hesitant whisper as she added, "What if my big sister never gets all the way better?" _I mean, I'd still love her lots, but… Elsa doesn't deserve a life like that. She deserves wayyyy better._

"Then we love her just the same as always, princess. Miss Anna, I honestly have no idea if she will ever heal inside completely, but I do know we can at least help her feel significantly better than she does now. Miss Elsa can still live a happy life even if she's not a hundred percent healed inside, I know she can." Gerda gave the princess a comforting hug as she went on, "Just remember how many times she's been visibly happy. Your sister _does_ feel happy, just not nearly as much as she should. Go talk to her tomorrow, hmm?"

 **A/N: Again, I am _so_ sorry for the late update. :( The next chapter for 'Child of Ska∂i' will most likely be up tomorrow.:)**

 **Next chapter WILL be coming soon!**


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: Thanks to everyone who's followed/favorited and/or is reading but not reviewing:)**

 **Olivia O'Neil-I'm glad you liked it and that it was helpful for your history exam:)**

 **Guest-Thank you!:) I'm actually already thinking about that, but I canNOT start yet another story right now.:/ I can barely keep up with my current two because or school stuff. :( I will probably write a series of Elsa's journal entries eventually, though.:) (Like, in the future.:P)**

 **raven678-Elsa can't really help feeling like she does, even if she truly knows otherwise deep inside. (Also, she still feels like she's a burden to everyone around her because she literally heard her father say so when she was little and she still remembers being alone for so long. That's not even counting that she feels like she keeps needing someone to take care of her in the present.) I think Elsa just needs some TLC and "quiet time".:)**

 **Elsa Tomago-Yes, Elsa should definitely practice that when she's alone.:) Elsa knows that she's good at reading people, and so she's _very_ sure that she's interpreting Anna's reaction correctly. The trouble is that she's only half right...she doesn't know Anna's reasoning.:/ And Anna just sees Elsa's bad leg as something she caused, and therefore feels guilty about it, which makes her feel sorry for Elsa...which Elsa of course doesn't like.:P**

 **Mandy-I'm glad you liked what Gerda did for Elsa.:) Gerda was trying to get Elsa to really truly see her real self, and not the distorted negative picture she has of herself.:/ And Elsa's leg...that in of itself doesn't really bother her-like she told Gerda, she'd rather it work properly, but she's used to it and it doesn't particularly bother her anymore. But she _doesn't_ want to be treated differently than before...she still just wants to be 'normal', and she doesn't understand why Anna actually likes her powers and hates seeing her having to wear a brace on her leg. I tried to express both sisters' POVs...I mean, if I were in Elsa's place, extra attention might be nice for a little while (ie., no longer than a few days:P), but in the end I'd really just want people to act exactly the same as before. And if I were Anna, I'm sure I'd react very similar to the way she did. So yeah...maybe I'm complicating things, but I wanted both girls' reactions to be realistic, and I don't think either of them would be instantly 100% okay knowing Elsa is _not_ ever going to be completely healed physically, even if she works hard to to fix it herself. (I guess that's kind of a spoiler, but not really...I'll say right now that Elsa will be able to partially heal her leg; I just won't say how much.:))**

 **Guest-Thank you; I'm glad you liked it!:) I'd answer your question, but I think the site didn't actually save/post all the words because I don't understand the question.:/ If you ask whatever your question was again, I'll do my best to answer it.:)**

 **On to the story!:)**

Elsa awoke the next morning very startled. There was her dragon Linnae right outside her window banging on the glass. She quickly got dressed in the bathroom and then headed over to the window. "It's about time you got back, Linnae," she scolded. "I've been wondering why you were taking so long."

Linnae was unapologetic, although she made a contented purring sound like a cat when Elsa reached outside and gave her a hug. _I waited out a rainstorm before coming back,_ she 'told' Elsa.

"Oh." Elsa instructed her dragon to stay outside and perhaps sit on the roof of the castle or something, knowing her parents wouldn't like Linnae being indoors. "Thank you for taking Rapunzel home to Corona for me," she added.

"C'n I call you Mommy Elsa?" Anikka asked hopefully, happily jumping up and down on the bed.

Elsa jumped in surprise, not having realized Anikka was even awake. She was tempted to scold the little girl for jumping on her bed-Elsa _hated_ leaving beds all messy-but then remembered she had loved jumping on beds when she was little and kind of still would like to do so if she could even if she was twenty-one. _I still don't understand why Anikka wants to call me mommy…_ "I'd rather you just call me 'Elsa', but I won't say you can't call me that, either," she said finally, determined to tell the truth. Something inside her still felt completely uncomfortable with a child calling her 'mommy' even though she had adopted the little girl. Elsa put her hands on her hips as she watched Anikka jumping on the bed and just smiled. "If you keep jumping, you have to help me make my bed afterwards. Fair?"

Anikka nodded and continued jumping. "Watch this! I'm gonna fly. Like you, an'-"

Elsa's eyes went wide in fear as she watched Anikka launch herself right off the bed. Everything seemed to be in slow motion to Elsa as she threw herself toward the child and simultaneously created a pile of soft snow, hoping she would actually catch Anikka. A second later, Elsa landed hard in the snow with Anikka in her arms. _Ow. Ow, ow, ow. That was not what I wanted. This is not soft powdery snow; it's the hard pack-y kind that's good for building things._ Elsa just blinked in shock as she hugged Anikka tightly. _But I did not hurt Anikka with my magic. And I didn't have a flashback of the original accident when Anna and I were little._ "Anikka, are you okay?" she asked worriedly.

Anikka nodded. "Uh-huh. But Elsa not good thing t' land on. Elsa's bones all poky," she said quite seriously. "You are not fat e-nough," Anikka added, poking at Elsa's shoulder. Then she scrambled off Elsa's lap and pointed at Elsa's bandaged arm and then her braced leg. "Is Elsa ok? I not want you hurt."

Elsa couldn't help bursting into giggles. She tried very hard not to laugh, but she couldn't help it. "I'm fine, Anikka, but that little incident could have easily ended up hurting one or both of us badly. Do _not_ do that again. Ever. I know you just wanted to fly, but you _know_ you can't do that. I also know doing things that look daring or adventurous are fun as long as they don't risk hurting someone, but you have to _think_ first. Like if you're wanting to dive into water, you have to check how deep it is first. Or if you're trying to slide down a hallway in your socks, you make sure the whole hall is empty first so if you do crash, you won't break something and you'll be less likely to hurt yourself. D'you understand?" Elsa asked, hoping she had explained things properly.

Anikka nodded ever so slightly, looking very chastened. "I sorry. Are you mad?"

"Yes, because you could have gotten hurt," Elsa replied, hugging the little girl close. "But you didn't, so let's just forget about it. Promise not to do that again?"

"Uh-huh. I p'omise." Then a second later, Anikka asked, "Will you jump on th' bed with me? I p'omise I not try t' fly."

Elsa bit her lip as she glanced at her braced leg. _How am I supposed to do that? I honestly wouldn't mind, but…_ She sighed as she slowly pulled herself to her feet using the bedpost. "I don't think I can, but I'll try," she said finally. Elsa began biting her lip again as she tried to think of a way to make Anikka's request work. _I'll just cover the floor around the bed with powdery snow so if-_ when _-I fall, it won't matter. I don't want to use my air currents in front of Anikka anymore…seeing me 'fly' is what made her want to try._ "Okay, I'm ready to try when you are."

Anikka clapped her hands excitedly and scrambled up on the bed with Elsa right behind her. All her excitement abruptly disappeared when she saw Elsa's face. Elsa wasn't doing this because she wanted to; it was a chore for her. She already looked like she thought she was about to fall. "I sorry. I know Elsa not want t' do this. It ok," Anikka tried to tell Elsa.

But now Elsa had decided in her mind that she was going to do it no matter what, and she refused to budge. "I said I would try," she said quietly, slowly letting go of the bedpost. Almost immediately Elsa began wobbling, and she felt little Anikka grab her hands to steady her. She smiled a tiny bit, still clutching Anikka's hands. _Maybe I can do this. I know I can't jump like I did when I was little, but maybe I can at least a little bit._

"Maybe we c'n jump to-gether," Anikka offered. She already knew that Elsa had been feeling bad because of something to do with her leg, and she was determined not make whatever Elsa's problem was worse. Maybe the older girl just needed someone to really believe in her but not push her to do things, either. Anikka wasn't sure, but she _was_ sure that simply grabbing Elsa's hands to help her had been the right thing to do because Elsa had smiled, even if it was just a tiny bit. Anikka began jumping a little, first just slowly and then starting to jump higher and faster, still holding Elsa's hands tightly.

Elsa immediately began feeling like she was going to fall, but with Anikka's help, she managed to stay on her feet. Soon a delighted smile spread across Elsa's face. While Elsa had quickly realized that there was no way she could jump on her own-her brace wouldn't let her-she could kind of sort of hold her bad leg a bit out of the way and use Anikka's continuous jumping to help her bounce up and down on her good leg. _I'm so glad I at least tried. It's not the same as when I was little, but it's still fun. And I made Anikka happy._

* * *

Both girls were giggling happily when Gerda peeked in the room. Without a word, Gerda went back down the hall as fast as she could to get Anna. _Anna needs to see that. Elsa, Anikka, please don't stop jumping on the bed. I can't believe I am hoping those girls are jumping on the bed…_

"Miss Anna, you need to get up immediately!" Gerda exclaimed firmly, pulling an awake-but-not-quite Anna out of bed and back down the hall.

"The sleepy princess commands you to let me sleep," Anna said, trying to go back to her room.

"Princess Anna, it's your sister. There's something you need to see," Gerda told her, knowing that would get the princess's attention.

Sure enough, Anna was instantly wide awake. "Gerda, what happened? Is there something wrong with Elsa?" Anna asked worriedly. _What could have happened overnight?! Is Elsa hurt?_

"No, no, Miss Anna, far from it. Just…please come."

Confused, Anna obliged, but she decided that whatever was going on had better be good because one, if nothing bad had happened to Elsa, then Anna would not have gotten up; and two, she was really curious now. Anna lifted her hand to knock on Elsa's door, but Gerda quickly stopped her from doing so.

"Just look, princess," Gerda said quietly. _Anna needs to see this._

Anna was first horrified to see what Elsa and Anikka were doing. What if Elsa fell? What if she hurt herself? She grinned when she noticed the snow all around the bed. _So Elsa just took precautions in case she_ did _fall. Figures logical Elsa would do something like that._ Then Anna just tried her best not to squeal because she was so happy and excited.

Elsa looked _happy_.

She was smiling and giggling.

She didn't look all sad and scared. At least not right now.

Anna bit her lip as Elsa lost her balance and fell, worried that Elsa might start crying or something. But no, Elsa just said, "Oops, it happened _again,_ " Anikka helped Elsa stand back up, and soon both of them were laughing again. Anna turned back to Gerda, a big grin on her face. "Gerda, Elsa's _happy_. She's _jumping on her bed_. Hey, wait a minute…how's she doing that with that weak leg of hers anyway?" _Did Elsa fix it mostly somehow?_

"Why don't you just ask her?" Gerda nodded toward the door, but she didn't need to; Elsa had already spotted her two spying visitors.

* * *

Elsa awkwardly climbed down off the bed and just stood with her hands on her hips, loose wisps of hair falling around her face. Her cheeks were a bit pink from all the jumping about, but it wasn't from embarrassment this time, so she didn't care. "Why are you spying on me? I didn't know jumping on a bed was so interesting," she quipped.

Anna just ran over to Elsa and hugged her close. "You looked so _happy,_ Elsa. It was great! And I didn't know you could jump like that-did you heal-"

"No." Elsa instantly tensed up all over, not wanting to talk about that again. She tried to force a smile, but couldn't quite do so convincingly. "I guess it's not so 'great' anymore, huh?" Elsa started backing away and ended up tripping in the snow, landing right on her backside. She wasn't hurt, but her blue eyes began tearing up and she couldn't meet her little sister's eyes anymore. _I'm sorry I'm messed up. I'm sorry I disappointed you._

Anna privately facepalmed, knowing she had said the wrong thing. "I just put my foot right in my mouth," she mumbled. "Elsa, I'm sorry. Really, really sorry. I didn't mean it like that, I promise." Anna hesitated before asking, "Can-may I give you a hug?"

Elsa just stayed sitting in the snow, nervously clasping her hands together and staring at her braced leg, deciding it was a better idea to dump all her negative feelings on that rather than herself or Anna or anything else. Rather than answer Anna's question, Elsa hesitantly asked, "What…what _did_ you mean it like, then?" _Maybe it's just a misunderstanding. I should give Anna a chance to explain._ "And you don't have to apologize…it's okay." _It just still hurts, that's all._

Anna took a deep breath and just blurted out her explanation. "I talked to Gerda last night and I figured out that I think the reason hate seeing you permanently injured is mostly 'cause it happened because you rescued me. I mean, if you'd been born with your leg like that, I prob'ly wouldn't think anything about it at all. Maybe I'd feel a teeny bit bad 'cause you couldn't run with me or something but I wouldn't really care much. Because it'd just be part of you. But it's not, 'cause it happened 'cause you saved me and that's not fair. I saved you last summer and I didn't get permanently hurt." She paused, noticing neither Elsa's countenance nor her position had changed. _Is she even listening? I hope so…_ "Elsa, I swear I don't think less of you because of your leg. Or anything else about you, period. I…I know you're still sad and scared sometimes from what villainized-me did in that cave, and I'm sorry. I'm sorry for whatever bits of that could have been 'rooted in truth' like you were saying before. But I _promise_ I'll never, ever treat you like that. And…" Anna remembered that one moment she considered the worst from that whole thing and added, "And I'm sorry I brushed you off on the way home when you tried to reach for my hand."

Elsa still didn't look up, but she just said in a very quiet and sincere voice, "I trust you." She seemed to somehow crumple as she added, "There wasn't any…r-reason why you should have tried t-to help me on the w-way home anyways. I…I c-couldn't…couldn't…couldn't e-even…" Elsa finally just gave up trying to finish her sentence and just hid her face in her hands. _What's wrong with me? I was perfectly fine just a few minutes ago. I actually felt pretty good a few minutes ago; I was happy._ She sensed someone plop down next to her and then felt the someone just holding her close. _I'm safe at home. Elsa, stop crying. Just stop it. Your emotions are all over the place right now._ "Did…did Papa just r-rescue me because he had to?" she asked plaintively.

"Oh, Elsa, I don't know, but I really, really don't think so. And no, I should have done _something_. I should have just talked to you or something at the very least, even if you couldn't hold my hand." Anna had no idea what to say to Elsa that would actually help her, but she didn't want to hurt her. Not again. She nodded when Gerda quietly left the room, taking little Anikka with her. _I_ have _to help Elsa. I don't want her hurting like this all the time. And she was happy just a few minutes ago! And I made her upset, even though I didn't mean to…_ "Elsa, what do you want me to do? D'you want me to leave?"

"No." Elsa scooted away from Anna and roughly swiped at her tears. She picked Kolfinnia up when she began meowing loudly and just petted the little cat's soft fur. "I…I think there's something wrong with me," Elsa said finally, not in a negative tone of voice, just matter-of-factly.

Anna frowned, unsure what Elsa meant. _She doesn't sound like she's picking on herself this time, but…_ "I'm sorry, sis, but I don't understand what you mean. What exactly are you talking about?"

"I think there is something wrong with me inside. Last night Gerda said something that I hadn't really grown up properly emotionally, even though the rest of me is grown up. I think that's what's wrong. I can't control my emotions because I don't know how." Elsa smiled a tiny bit as she set Kolfinnia down and then made her signature snowflake in one hand. _At least I can control my powers most of the time._

"But Elsa, that's not your fault. That's our parents' fault," Anna countered. "Besides, you're still way better than before the Great Thaw. I think you just need help."

Elsa gave her little sister a lopsided smile at that. "So you admit I'm right," she said quietly. Elsa's expression grew serious as she continued, "Anna, I have a _job_ to do, for goodness sakes. Arendelle can't have someone who has the emotions of an eight-year-old in charge. That isn't fair to you or Papa or anyone else in this country. But especially you and Papa. Both of you are-or in Papa's case, were-directly in line for the throne. How must Papa feel, seeing his emotionally damaged daughter having his job? Or you, seeing me break down all the time? You don't leave someone like me with that much of an influence over so many people." Deep inside, Elsa did _not_ want to abdicate, but right now, she honestly thought that would be the best thing for her country. She could always work on her project to help abused children anyways; she knew Anna fully supported it.

Anna bit her lip, not quite sure what to say for once in her life. "Elsa, by our laws, you have full rights to keep the throne and you know it. Dad no longer has claim to the throne because of the rules about coronations and stuff. You know I don't want to be queen anyways; and besides, I was always the spare anyhow. You-"

Now Elsa stood up, her blue eyes blazing, her hands clenched in fists at her sides. "Just _who_ called you a 'spare'?!" she demanded. "I'll…I'll, I don't know, make them do some horrid job like cleaning the dungeons or something!" _Who called Anna that?!_

"Good grief, Elsa, it was just our old tutor. You froze his tea. The one you got in trouble with for drawing optical illusions when you were supposed to be doing something else. Illusion has two l's, by the way," Anna teased, remembering little Elsa's diary entry that had made sure to point that out.

Elsa looked confused for a second, but then she remembered. "Oh, I used to make very sure to correct or point out mistakes in that diary if I caught them. Sorry, I was a strange little kid," she quipped. "But Anna, that tutor was wrong. You aren't a spare. You're basically my second-in-command," Elsa said firmly.

"I'm the second kid in a royal family; of course I'm the spare. There has to be at least two kids usually in case something happens to the f-" Anna cut herself off, realizing something sickening and hating the mixed expression on her sister's face.

* * *

There was a long silence before Elsa held out her hand and then pulled Anna over to the mirror. _I think both of us are thinking the exact same thing…_

Anna scowled at their reflection and crossed her arms. "Look at us. Nothing but little pawns in a bloodline," she spat in irritation. "Do…d'you think Mom and Dad really wanted either of us, or did they just have us because they had to?"

Elsa turned and just walked over to the window and stared outside. _How can I answer Anna's question? I'm a hundred percent sure of the right answer, but I don't know how to explain it._ After a minute, she turned back to Anna and gave her a sad smile. "I believe they did truly want one child, and had two because they felt they had to, and because they wanted a child that wasn't born 'defective'. They wanted you, Anna. I know they loved you very much right from the beginning. I remember begging them that I wanted 'a sister _so_ bad!' before you were born. But I…I think Mama was already pregnant with you when I started asking; I just didn't know it. Three-year-olds aren't exactly good at time perception. At the time, I thought I had just gotten my best wish ever because Mama and Papa loved me, but that's…that's not why." Elsa subconsciously wrapped her arms around her middle, hugging herself, as she dropped her gaze to the floor. "It…it was just the opposite, and…and I think if I _had_ been born second, they would have gotten rid of me or given me away. But they did love you; I'm sure of it."

Anna ran and just squeezed Elsa close. This sort of thing was why Elsa felt like she did. But this wasn't just some delusional train of thought Elsa had come up with; they were facts. Anna was sure of it. She remembered the two times their parents had left Elsa chained in the dungeon when she was seventeen and eighteen. A parent who loved their child would not chain her in a dungeon. Anna remembered how Elsa had told Anna their father had left her trapped in a closet for hours with a hurt ankle when she was ten. Or what about simply keeping Elsa isolated in her room and forcing her to wear gloves constantly, to the point that she had been thoroughly frightened to go without them when she was first given the chance? Teaching her to be scared of something that was physically part of her?

Elsa grew worried when Anna didn't reply and just continued hugging her. "Anna, are you okay? I was just trying to be honest," she said softly.

"Am _I_ ok?! Elsa, are you kidding me?!" Anna exploded. "What on earth are you thinking?! That's just…just…that's awful, and it's not fair!"

Elsa shrugged and just smiled a tiny bit. "It's okay, mostly. It still hurts, but that's just the way it is. They did _not_ want me...especially Papa. I…I think _maybe_ Mama wanted me, but I…I'm not sure. But they did want you, so don't start thinking Mama and Papa didn't love you, because I know they did. Papa loved holding you when you were a baby when he wasn't working. I remember both Mama and Papa were _so_ proud of you when you started walking. I helped you learn," Elsa said, in a slightly proud big-sister voice. She giggled as she added, "Evidently you were a lot younger than I was when you started walking. I think you weren't even a year old yet and I know I was 'almost nineteen months', because Papa always said that in this very huffy tone of voice."

Anna frowned. "What difference does what age we walked matter? That's dumb. Although it sounds like you really did take _forever_. Were you doing something else instead or something?"

"Gerda told me once that I was more into playing with my magic and looking at pictures in books when I was that little. She said I was really quiet and the few times I _did_ throw a fit, I would purposely cause mischief with my magic. I can vaguely remember being frustrated shortly after you were born 'cause you wouldn't be quiet and Papa kept ignoring me and I put a sheen of ice in his and Mama's slippers so their feet would get cold. I had this stuffed blue bear I loved to death and I said he did it. I don't remember if I got in a lot of trouble or not."

Anna tried very hard to stifle her laughter as she pictured a three-and-a-half-year-old Elsa saying her favorite stuffed toy had put ice in her parents' slippers. "You had to have been an awfully cute little kid," Anna teased. "And you liked looking at books when you were that little? I think you're silly. Although it's not like I have much room to talk since I like reading myself."

"You'll think it's even sillier when I tell you my favorite book to look at was this one full of patterns in nature, like leaves, ice, snowflakes, branches, dewy spider webs, and things like that." Elsa couldn't help laughing when she saw Anna's incredulous expression.

"Stinker," Anna teased. "And weird. But in a really good way," she made sure to add, but she needn't have worried-Elsa was still giggling, and Anna knew her sister was perfectly fine at the moment when she felt something _very_ cold dumped all over her. " _Elsa!_ " Anna yelped in protest.

Elsa had intended to leave Anna stuck in the snow and tickle her feet, but she immediately changed her mind when she saw her parents in the doorway. Instantly the snow disappeared and she bit her lip as she glanced toward them, her cheeks slightly pink in embarrassment. "Good morning, Mama, Papa," she said quietly.

Agdar looked disapprovingly at both of his daughters, but he didn't make any comments. "Well, I hear you are planning to go to those children's house today to attempt to fix their home situation. Elsa, you should _not_ go alone. I will come with you if you like," he offered. _That silly girl will end up just giving the family money or something, I know she will. And I do not want to risk Elsa getting hurt again._

Elsa hesitated before replying. _I don't want Papa coming with me, but I know he's just trying to be helpful. I should let him come. Besides, he'll look more imposing than Anna or me._ "Okay."

 **A/N: Next chapter coming soon!:) I'm very sorry for the recent longer waits between chapters.:/**


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: Thanks to everyone who's followed/favorited and/or is reading but not reviewing.:)**

 **Sorry for the late update.:/**

 **Olivia O'Neil-Thank you:) Good job-that sounds like a good grade to me.:) Elsa and her father do need to mend their relationship, and Agdar needs to understand that Elsa is always going to be just...Elsa, and stop wanting her to not be herself.:/**

 **the green baron-Glad you liked it.:) It just seemed like something little Elsa would probably do. She seems like the type of child that would say something like that...little Elsa would have known no one would believe that, so she would probably excuse the lie in her head that since no one believes it, it's not really lying.:P**

 **Elsa Tomago-Anikka is only 5, though...she just wanted Elsa to play with her.:P But you're right; she really shouldn't have asked Elsa to try that since she knows about Elsa's leg. But it did end up making Elsa happy, so it didn't matter.:)**

 **moohamjang-Thank you!:) I agree-Elsa shouldn't abdicate, but right now she just feels like she's not good enough.:/ (Without spoiling anything, I'll just say that even if Elsa DID abdicate, I would never never take the queen position away from her permanently. Just no. No, no, no.)**

 **raven678-Thank you:) I thought Elsa needed to do something silly for once. She's so serious all the time, and I think there's still the slightly mischievous and playful little Elsa inside her somewhere.:) I agree-Elsa shouldn't go to Niko's house by herself.**

 **On to the story!:)**

After receiving directions from Nikoleta, Elsa and her father started to leave the castle for the children's house. (Elsa had decided that she didn't want to risk Nikoleta's safety by allowing her to come along.) _I should hint around what I've been thinking to Papa. I want to know what he's thinking…_ "Papa," Elsa ventured slowly, "do you ever miss being king of Arendelle?"

Agdar stopped short and just stared at his daughter. "What kind of question is that, Elsa? And I still think we should take the royal carriage for this trip. Might make these people more willing to release truthful information." _Not to mention Elsa might not be able to walk all the way there…or if she can, she'll be completely exhausted._

"I won't use fear to force people to tell me something," Elsa replied firmly. She frowned when her father just picked her up so she wouldn't have to walk over an uneven section in the courtyard. "Papa, I can walk by myself; I'm not a baby. And please ask first." _I know he's just trying to help, but I can do it by myself._

"No, you aren't a baby, but you also can't walk properly. I don't want you falling and hurting yourself again." Agdar continued carrying Elsa all the way to the castle gates before setting her down, despite Elsa's obvious embarrassment. He frowned as he watched Elsa's reaction. She had dropped her gaze to her bad leg and made a face, although Agdar was very sure she wasn't mad. She just looked upset.

Before Agdar could say a word, Elsa asked, "Papa, do you still think I'm d-defective?" Elsa's voice sounded a bit childish, but she stood up straight and unsuccessfully tried her best not to limp as the two of them continued walking. Elsa sighed, knowing no matter how hard she tried, she was not going to be able to walk 'normally'. She just couldn't. Usually she didn't particularly care, at least not a lot, but right now she felt like her father was somehow embarrassed to be seen with her. _Elsa, you can't help that; it's not your fault. Just…try not to think about it._

"Absolutely not, Elsa." Agdar was a bit stung by Elsa's question, but he knew it was his own fault Elsa had asked such a thing in the first place. He stopped and put both hands on his daughter's shoulders and looked her straight in the face. "I have to admit I would much prefer my daughter to be normal, but you are _not_ defective. I am sorry I made you think of yourself like that in the first place," Agdar said quietly.

Elsa impulsively gave her daddy a hug, not caring that they were in public.

Agdar quickly pushed her away. "Elsa, stop it. You're the queen and you're in public, for goodness sakes. If you have to have a hug so much, you can have one when we get home."

"I'm sorry, I just-"

* * *

"We don't care, sir," a friendly female voice said suddenly. The woman gave Elsa a reassuring smile and added, "Queen Elsa, you just go right on and give your father a hug all you want. Seems perfectly appropriate to me."

Elsa's cheeks turned a bit pink, but she smiled back at the woman. _I recognize her. That's Netta. The one with baby Eva. She let me hold her baby that one time._ "Thank you, Netta. How is baby Eva?" Elsa usually didn't like initiating conversations, but this time she didn't mind.

Netta was a bit surprised Elsa remembered Eva's name, although she knew the queen had liked holding baby Eva very much the summer before after Elsa had given her speech. "She's fine, at home with her daddy. She still loves that ice crown you let her keep, Queen Elsa." She paused and frowned a bit, noticing that while Elsa's smile was genuine, it didn't quite reach her eyes. Those big blue eyes looked…pained somehow. And while Netta had heard that the queen had hurt her leg somehow, she hadn't seen Elsa in person since-at least not up close-and seeing present-Elsa bothered her a bit. Netta didn't think for one second that Elsa wasn't fit to be queen anymore, but she was quite honestly rather worried about her. Was something or someone hurting her? Had something bad happened to her that wasn't just an accident of some kind? Why had Elsa, who Netta knew had absolute authority, apologized to her own father for trying to give him a hug, of all things? Was the former king treating her badly because she could no longer walk very well? _That's the same man who kept Queen Elsa in that castle for over a decade. What if…It's none of my business; it's not my place to ask her if she's all right. But…_ "Queen Elsa, are you…are you all right?" Netta finally asked quietly, hoping she was doing the right thing. "I know it's none of my business and I understand if you don't wish to answer, but I…I just want you to know your people love their queen and we want to see you well and happy."

Elsa nodded and just said thank-you, just as Agdar yanked her aside. "Of course my daughter is all right. What are you implying?" he demanded. "What business is it of yours to ask the monarch that?"

"With all due respect, sir, _she_ is the monarch, and she quite honestly looks like she's in pain somehow. Queen Elsa is injured, obviously, and I daresay it's only polite to ask that when someone's-" Netta cut herself off when she felt a cool hand on her arm. "I'm sorry, Queen Elsa."

"You don't need to apologize," Elsa said firmly. "Papa, you owe Netta an apology for snapping at her. All she did was ask me if I was all right. She…she was just being nice." Elsa turned back to Netta and gave her a reassuring smile. "I'm not sure what you heard about what happened to me, but it was an accident. And my leg does _not_ hurt; I just can't walk without wearing a brace now. I'm not in any pain, I promise." _Elsa, that's not the kind of pain Netta saw. She saw emotional pain. You didn't cover it up well enough. Stupid._

Netta knew Elsa was telling the truth but not telling the whole story; but she didn't say so. "Well, Queen Elsa, I hope you get better soon. Thank you for asking about baby Eva," Netta replied. _I don't think most people would notice, but there's_ something _wrong with her, and it's not an injured leg, either._ Netta remembered seeing Agdar in person when he had been king, and he hadn't come off the same way then as he did now. The former king wouldn't have snapped at one of his citizens back then like Agdar had just done. Suddenly Netta was a hundred percent sure that Elsa had been, or was being, abused, and that Agdar was nervous someone would find out what he had done to her. _I believe Queen Elsa when she said her leg got hurt by accident, but I think she's hurting inside, and that is_ not _an accident._ Netta knew how fast rumors spread about the queen, so she decided she wouldn't tell anyone about her suspicions. She would _not_ damage Elsa's reputation for no reason; the young girl always did a fine job in Netta's opinion. The only bad thing she had done was freeze everything the summer before, and she had fixed that within days.

* * *

"Elsa, what on earth were you thinking, telling that woman all that information about yourself?" Agdar scolded a few minutes later once they were on their way again.

Elsa flinched but almost instantly shot back, "What were _you_ thinking, snapping at Netta like that? All she did was ask me if I was all right. Besides, all I told her was what was wrong with my leg. I'd rather she know the truth than whatever rumors are going around." _I didn't explain what was wrong with me inside. That would be stupid, I agree._

Agdar's voice softened as he replied, "It's not her place to ask you that, Elsa. I know you're just trying to be nice, but no one needs to know that information. Now everyone will know you're…disabled, that you can't even walk without wearing that brace. I know you can't possibly think that makes a good public image." He glanced around to make sure no one was nearby, and then awkwardly tried to give Elsa a hug.

But Elsa just backed away, her hands clenched in fists as she struggled not to let any ice out, her blue eyes blinking rapidly as she tried not to cry. "Don't call me 'disabled', and don't call anyone else who's hurt like that, either. Not in that 'that's bad and needs to be hidden' sort of way," she whispered fiercely. "What does my stupid leg have to do with 'public image'? _Nothing!_ Even if it did, anyone can see I limp and I'm wearing a brace on it. If people can see anyway, then they may as well know the truth. And _don't_ patronize me, Papa. Just…just leave me alone. I'll go to Nikoleta's house by myself. Just…go away." Elsa could feel ice tingling all over her, and her leg was starting to seriously hurt, but she was determined not to show it. Right now she just wanted her daddy to leave her be. _But Papa didn't mean anything by saying that. I know he didn't. Why does that somehow make me feel worse?_ "Papa, sometimes I _do_ feel self-conscious because of my leg, but I know I shouldn't. Knowing some people are thinking like you do makes it worse. That…that doesn't make me less intelligent, or less of a person," she said softly. "You're being prejudiced, not just towards me, towards a _lot_ of people."

"Elsa, that's not what I meant, and you know it. Stop acting so childish."

"Papa, yes it is. You said 'I know you can't possibly think that makes a good public image'. Because of this." Elsa pointedly held her skirt a bit aside so her brace would show and then watched her father's reaction.

"Stop that, Elsa," Agdar replied, genuinely trying not to be mean to her. _I just don't want people taking advantage of her because of that. Someone will end up hurting her again like Jade did. Elsa doesn't understand…no one is going to be as accepting as she is. I know I am most definitely not…_

Elsa bit her lip. "That is exactly what I mean, and it isn't fair. Are you embarrassed to be seen with me because I'm not your definition of 'normal'?" Elsa's blue eyes were bright with tears, and she roughly swiped them away before just shaking her head and walking away. _I'll take care of this on my own. I knew trying to go somewhere with Papa by myself was a bad idea._

Agdar sighed and just followed along behind Elsa, not wanting to leave her alone. Elsa's truthful words hurt, and that was his own fault. Different or not, he wouldn't leave her to deal with Nikoleta's parents by herself; he was worried they might hurt her somehow.

* * *

When Elsa arrived at Nikoleta's house per the directions, she took a deep breath before knocking on the door. _Okay, Elsa, you can do this. You have to make sure Nikoleta and Eliot will be safe, and get their parents' side of the story._ She instinctively flinched when the door was suddenly flung open.

"Yeah? What do you want? Not interested in buying anything," a woman that Elsa assumed was Nikoleta's mother spat.

"M'am, I am not trying to sell an-" Elsa started, but the door being slammed shut again cut her off. _Oh, come on. That woman was drunk. Elsa, don't give up. You knew this wasn't going to be easy._ She bit her lip and knocked on the door again, bracing herself for whatever reaction would happen.

"I said beat it!" the woman shouted from inside.

"No," came the firm reply from outside.

The door whipped open again, and Elsa quickly ducked inside before the woman could kick her out again. "Sorry for intruding, but-"

"You should be! Now get out!"

Elsa stepped backward, her hands held up defensively in front of her, as the man she assumed was the children's father came into the room. Suddenly she wished she'd just let her father come along. This was dangerous. The woman was obviously drunk, and she knew the man had hurt Nikoleta. These people might hurt her too, queen or not. _Elsa, calm down. You have your powers. If you have to, you can easily get out of here…right?_

"What did you let the queen in here for, woman?! This place is a hole!" the man shouted.

"The queen? What're you talkin' about? The queen isn't here, just that girl. And I didn't let 'er in! She came in!"

" 'That girl' _is_ Queen Elsa, you idiot!"

Elsa figuratively froze as the couple began arguing. What was she supposed to do? _That man hit her. Even if she's a horrible wife, he's not supposed to do that. Do they even know I'm here?_ "Stop it," she tried to say, but Elsa felt like her mouth was glued shut. She was horrified. Why were they fighting? Was the man angry because his wife was drinking, or was the wife drinking because her husband was a creep? _Probably both? I don't know._

Elsa's body tensed up all over when the man came up to her. "Where is my daughter? I know she came to you! She wouldn't have gone anywhere else!" he yelled.

"You have two children," she squeaked, unsure what to say.

"The younger one doesn't count," he replied in a quieter voice, brushing Elsa's comment off.

Now Elsa was angry. She glared straight at the man, standing as tall as she could. "What do you think of me as reigning monarch?" she asked flatly. "Truthfully."

The man just looked puzzled now. "You're fine, Queen Elsa. Why would anyone think otherwise? You take care of everything; you took over that rat's duchy thing or whatever. Don't want you in my pigsty of a house, though." He shot a scathing look at his wife at that.

Elsa hesitated, unsure how to get her point across. "Well…I…I can't walk properly, either. Your son Eliot is a nice little boy and you shouldn't ignore him because he's different." Elsa gave the man a lopsided smile and added, "I'm sure we can work something out so Nikoleta and Eliot would be safe and loved here." She yelped a second later when something hit her across the face; then was puzzled when the man started apologizing and begging her not to hurt him. "Sir, I don't want to hurt you; I just want your children to be safe," she replied quickly, holding one hand over her eye. _My family is going to have a fit and say I shouldn't have come here._

Three startled heads turned to the door when they heard sharp knocking on the door. "Open in the name of the queen!" Elsa sighed and went over to the door, recognizing her father's voice instantly. The second the door was open, Agdar marched inside. He took one look at Elsa and then just stepped protectively in front of her. Elsa stepped around him and ignored his protests. She had to keep the situation under control herself; she knew her father wouldn't hesitate to arrest the man for hitting her, and she didn't want that. "Excuse me, everyone, I think this can be settled very easily. You, sir, are under official warning from me. I will allow your children to remain here, but under a few conditions. You will not hit them, especially not out of pure impulsive anger like you did to me. You will not ignore them. You will get a job, and Nikoleta will keep any money she earns to do with as she chooses. You will make sure Eliot receives schooling-you may send him to the castle for lessons if you like. If any of these conditions are broken, the children will not stay with you any longer, and you will be fined and arrested for child abuse and neglect. Good day." _I wanted to actually get their side of the story, but I don't think they'll tell me anything anyway, and especially not with Papa here._

* * *

The second they arrived home, Agdar found Gerda and just said, "Gerda, fix Elsa's eye. That idiot she visited hit her. Elsa said she was going to her room." He knew Elsa wasn't seriously hurt, but he was very angry that someone had hit her like that and then she hadn't even punished the someone for it.

Gerda frowned. "Mr. Grieg, Miss Elsa just has a shiner though, right? She's not concussed or anything, is she?" Gerda asked. _I hope Elsa's all right…_

"Yes, yes, she 'just' has a black eye. But those children's dad _hit_ her!"

"Well, I'll check her, but you know Miss Elsa can't really use ice to make it feel better…" Gerda shook her head and went to find Elsa.

Agdar just sighed. _Why didn't Elsa do something? And if she couldn't, why didn't she at least punish those people for treating her like that? But no, she was just all concerned about those kids._

 **A/N: I'm VERY sorry about the long wait.:/**

 **I wanted to show in this chapter that Nikoleta's and Eliot's parents aren't totally evil; they're just kind of...really terrible parents. And not particularly pleasant people.:P**

 **Also Agdar was right in thinking Elsa shouldn't go to that house alone, but he messed things up (again) with Elsa since he doesn't want people to know she's hurt and can't walk properly. Of course poor Elsa just thinks yet another person isn't treating her the same simply because she's not so-called 'normal'.:/**

 **Next chapter coming soon!**

 **P.S. The next chapter of 'Child of Ska∂i' should be posted later today.:)**


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: Thanks to everyone who's followed/favorited and/or is reading but not reviewing:)**

 **Olivia O'Neil-You're welcome:) I'm glad you liked Netta.:) As far as Elsa's leg is concerned, to be fair she is being a bit touchy about it, but I figure that's believable, especially when people like her father are treating her differently because of it. Agdar will talk to Elsa soon.:)**

 **Elsa Tomago-I don't know why that was so funny, but it is.:P I can't see Elsa saying she didn't care and basically 'tough luck', but it sure is funny.:) No, she probably shouldn't ask Agdar that.:P If/when Nikoleta's parents act up again, I promise Elsa will actually punish them. Right now she's trying to give them a chance to shape up without being forced to do so.**

 **moohamquest-I'm not sure if you've read my previous stories (thank you if you have:)), but Agdar has actually gotten a lot better, even though he's still...not a good father. Thanks for the feedback about Elsa's general reaction towards her bad leg. I've been worried about portraying a permanent/semipermanent injury like that because I want it to be realistic (yes, Elsa is trying to heal herself with her magic and regular therapy, but still) and I don't want to offend anyone. At this point Elsa's pretty much okay with it; she doesn't like it, but as she says at one point in this chapter 'it's more of a minor inconvenience than anything else'. I'm so glad you like my story.:)**

 **raven678-No, Elsa shouldn't have gone in that house alone, but she wanted to show her father she could do something on her own.:/**

 **orang biasa-Thank you:) I'm glad you like my series.:) Is there anything specific that you either really hate or really love? Just curious.:P 1) Because back when I started writing Frozen fanfic, I thought it was the greatest idea ever to have Elsa and Anna go to Cedar Point in Sandusky, Ohio, which neither exists in their world nor is anywhere nearby. So I made it so Arendelle was on the Canadian side of Lake Erie and it's present day even though Arendelle doesn't have modern technology. *sigh* That was the way it started.:P BUT...since then I have a detailed backstory for why they don't have the technology, where Elsa's powers came from, and other things like that. So it was originally from a kind of stupid idea, but now I love it because I know my story-verse is unique and still satisfies movie canon. *yay* :) 2) I'm not sure what exactly the question is...if it's why does Elsa feel emotional so easily, it's because she's still not good at dealing with her emotions (although she's better) and they go all over the place if she doesn't completely hide them. She'll probably never _really_ be good at handling emotions, and that's okay.:) 3) Hans and Espen are, um, cleaning the castle, lol.:P They'll show up again soon. It's just they aren't as important to the plot and so they aren't showing up much.:) Also, I love long reviews and your English is fine.:)**

 **On to the story!:) {SPECIAL NOTE: I am SO sorry this chapter is so late.:/ I have a lot of stuff to do for school and I've been having some personal problems I'd rather not talk about. Anyways I'm sorry.:( }**

"Good grief, please stop fussing. It's just a bruise," Elsa said again. She gave Nikoleta a smile as she put her hand back over her eye, purposely trying to cool the bruised area as much as she could. "You and Eliot should be okay now. I gave your parents a warning, and if something bad _does_ happen again, you can contact me anytime with those crystals and I'll come right away."

Both Nikoleta and Anna traded glances. "Queen Elsa, I don't want you risking your safety for me or my brother…you…you ended up with a nasty shiner today because of us," Nikoleta said slowly.

"And Elsa, why didn't you defend yourself?" Anna demanded. "Why'd you let someone hit you like that?!"

"I was _trying_ to be diplomatic, Anna! Throwing ice to defend myself defeats the purpose, wouldn't you say?" Elsa sighed. _And it happened too fast for me to do anything anyway…_ She knew her father would probably have plenty to say later since he had said absolutely nothing on the way home, other than that she shouldn't have risked her safety like that. Besides, her eye hurt and she felt like she was getting a headache. She wanted to lie down for a few minutes, but then if she did that, then everyone would just fuss all the more. _Come on, Elsa, it's nothing. Just ignore it._

"You guys, a shiner isn't going to kill Elsa," Kiara said matter-of-factly. "So she did-sorry, Elsa-something stupid. She's human. Humans make mistakes and do stupid things. Even smart people."

"Come on, everyone out. Shoo," Gerda said the second she came into Elsa's room. "Come back later." She waited until Kiara, Nikoleta and Anna were gone and then went straight to Elsa and sat down next to her. "Miss Elsa, you don't have to try and act strong around me. I won't fuss all over you, I promise. Not that I can really do much for it, but may I please take a look?"

Elsa slowly moved her hand away from her eye and didn't say anything for a moment. _Papa probably sent Gerda up here. Nobody can do anything for a shiner on me; I'm stuck with it 'til it goes away on its own._ "Gerda, if I lay down, d'you promise not to start worrying and fussing and whatever else?" she asked ruefully.

Gerda chuckled and gently gave Elsa a hug. "Yes, I promise. Just let me check that nasty bruise first and make sure that's all it is, please, Miss Elsa." She quickly decided Elsa was fine; she was just going to be sore and not be able to open her eye very well for a little while. "I'd say continue putting something cold on it, because it can't hurt anyways. Tomorrow we can put something warm on it so it can start healing faster." Gerda paused before adding, "Miss Elsa, how exactly did that happen?"

"I…I was just talking to Niko's dad and he hit me across the face out of nowhere. Then he started apologizing all over himself. Gerda, it _wasn't_ because I didn't want to defend myself; it really wasn't. Papa thinks it is, but…" Elsa sighed, trying to explain what had happened. "It happened so fast, and…I mean, I _was_ scared, but I didn't freeze up. At least not when that man hit me. I froze up when Niko's parents were fighting because I didn't know what to do. But not when I was talking to them; I just-"

"Miss Elsa, I believe you," Gerda assured her. She frowned when she saw a single tear trickle down Elsa's cheek that she instantly wiped away. "What's wrong? Did your father say something to you?"

Elsa slowly nodded but didn't say anything, even though she knew Gerda wouldn't tell anyone or treat her differently for it. _Elsa, stop it. What is wrong with you?_

"What did he say, Miss Elsa?" Gerda asked patiently. "I can't help if you don't tell me." _I'll bet that man just told Elsa something stupid this time. Something that wasn't meant to hurt her but hurt anyway._

"It's nothing…just me being stupid again," Elsa said softly.

"You are not stupid. Every time you say that, that means there _is_ something wrong." Gerda paused for before continuing, "Miss Elsa, you shouldn't call yourself stupid, ever. It's not true and you're just hurting yourself. You have several people right here in the castle that care about you very much. Not to mention you are still our queen."

"I should...should abdicate f-for Anna," Elsa whispered, instinctively curling up on her side. She hugged the two dolls Anna had given her for her birthday last summer tightly.

Gerda hesitated before simply scooping Elsa up and just holding her close. "Miss Elsa, please just let me know if you don't want to be held," she said quietly.

Elsa just hid her face in Gerda's shoulder and didn't reply. _I'm twenty-one years old. I'm not a little girl anymore. Why does Gerda holding me make me feel better?_ After a minute, she finally just said, "Gerda, please fix me."

Gerda sighed. "You do not need fixing, Miss Elsa, and you should not abdicate, either. You know your sister doesn't want to be queen anyway; and quite frankly, while I'm sure she would do fine if need be, I don't think she would do as well a job as you do. Even if she's not so-called 'damaged' inside. Also, besides that, I…worry what might happen to you if you abdicated in favor of your father." She paused and helped Elsa stand up. "Miss Elsa, I know you still feel sad and hurt inside sometimes, but-"

"All the time," Elsa mumbled, mostly to herself. "Just less sometimes. It's useless to try to fix that."

"It doesn't matter, Miss Elsa, it doesn't. Please believe me. Please." Gerda frowned, not liking that Elsa didn't even seem to be listening. She knew Elsa probably just felt like Gerda was the only person she could visibly break down in front of without being treated differently somehow, but Gerda hated seeing Elsa like this. _What am I supposed to do for her? I don't care if she's 'different' on the outside, but I definitely care if she's feeling so horrible inside. I thought she was starting to get better… What happened? She's acting like she's just…given up on helping herself._ "Miss Elsa, listen to me. It's almost like you aren't even trying to get better. You cannot give up, Elsa Ingrid Nicoletta Grieg."

Elsa's pale face seemed to crumple at that. She knew deep inside that Gerda was right, but she had been trying for _so long_. Every time she had genuinely started feeling better, something else would knock her back. Over and over. Logically, why should she keep trying if the same thing would just happen again? Nothing she did would ever make her father not think there was something wrong with her. She wished she had managed to save Jade; that girl had probably been hurting inside just as much as she did, only she had turned into a villainous creep instead of a…broken little girl. _Elsa, you are not broken. You didn't feel broken at the ice palace. Admit it. You actually felt happy and confident when you went there with your family a short time ago._ Elsa's expression suddenly brightened. Surely there was a way to be somewhere in between. Those two extremes meant everything in the middle was possible, right? _Maybe Jade didn't die for no reason. She can make me see that that's the opposite extreme that I don't want, and that I can actually_ do _something_. After all, Elsa genuinely thought that Jade had come up with a well-thought-out plan…it had just been horribly cruel, and that meant she could just do the opposite. _I'll come up with a much better plan. One better thought out and one that will help people instead of hurt them._

Gerda smiled in relief, glad that Elsa didn't seem quite so upset anymore. "Miss Elsa, I think you have some things you need to talk about. I'm here for you whenever you're ready, and you needn't worry about me telling anyone. Why don't you just lie down and put some more ice on that eye, and I'll just go fix you and the others some dinner and let you rest awhile? Does that sound all right?"

Elsa smiled a bit and just nodded. "Okay."

* * *

DOWNSTAIRS…

"Agdar, what are you talking about?! I thought the whole point of you going to those children's house with Elsa was to make sure she was safe, and now you tell me you brought her home with a black eye?" Idun was downright angry. "What did you do to her that she tried to go take care of everything herself? Because when you left, Elsa seemed perfectly fine with having you there with her!"

"Why do you instantly blame me for everything? I didn't do a thing to that girl!" Agdar insisted. "She just got all upset for no reason at all…"

"So now she's just 'that girl'? _That girl_ is your daughter, and her name is Elsa! I may not know Elsa as well as Gerda and Anna do, but I do know she doesn't get upset for no reason. Something probably hurt her. Did you tell her something hurtful?" Idun asked in a slightly less angry tone. _I haven't even seen Elsa since she and Agdar got back…maybe I should just go see her._

Agdar hesitated, keeping his expression carefully neutral. "Maybe, but definitely not on purpose. She asked if I still thought she was…defective; I told her no; and then she just tried to give me a hug right there in public. Of course I made her stop, but I told her she could have a hug when we arrived home instead. This woman that Elsa evidently knows overheard us and then she and Elsa were talking for a minute. Elsa ended up explaining what was wrong with her leg, and after the woman left, I told Elsa she shouldn't have explained herself like she did." He paused before continuing, "Idun, I don't care what anyone says; that is _not_ good for Elsa's public image. I tried to explain to her why, that she shouldn't let everyone know about that, and she just got upset. Of course having her like that is embarrassing, and-"

" _My little girl is not embarrassing_!" Idun shouted. "It sounds like she told ONE person, not everyone; and besides, she probably just wanted to tell the truth about it. Do you really think no one knows that Elsa's partly…crippled? Agdar, she literally can't walk normally. I know I hate seeing Elsa like that just as much as you do, but Elsa can't help what happened to her. She's still just our daughter Elsa, messed up leg included. Besides, which do you think looks worse, Elsa willingly explaining the obvious truth or blatantly lying about it? Don't you think that just calls unneeded attention to it?"

"Rumors spread fast about the royal family, and you know it," Agdar said flatly. _But I suppose Idun has a point._ "I just don't want Elsa to be labeled different any more than she already is, or have anyone else take advantage of her like that Jade character did. I just want her to be normal."

"Well, she's not," Idun replied. "I still can't believe you didn't protect Elsa from getting hurt…I'm going to go see her and make sure she's ok."

"Why don't you leave her alone? Elsa's probably resting…at least she's supposed to be. And," Agdar's voice softened as he added, "Idun, I know we're lucky to even still have Elsa here with us, but she's just…I don't know. She was injured in the first place because we didn't manage to rescue her and Anna last year. What if Gerda can't help Elsa heal her leg? What if she always has to wear that awful brace?"

Idun sighed. "Agdar, for a week or so we all thought Elsa was never going to be able to walk again at all. Maybe we should focus on the positive? That at least she can walk in the first place, even if she's a little slow and awkward because of her limp." She paused before adding, " _Please_ don't make Elsa feel bad or self-conscious just for that. Both of us have hurt her far too much already. If someone mistreats her or labels her, let's make sure it's not us. Elsa deserves for her family to love and take care of her without any bad prejudices."

"Do you really think Elsa looks all right as far as her image with the public goes when she's in that condition?" Agdar asked, sincerely wanting an answer.

"It doesn't matter. Elsa can't help what's wrong with her physically," Idun said firmly. "I do know that if we were ordinary citizens of Arendelle, I'd rather Queen Elsa told us the truth up front. Also, Agdar, I don't know about you, but the first thing I notice about Elsa's appearance-at least when she's happy-is that bright lopsided smile of hers. If she's doing her 'queenly neutral expression', she honestly looks serious and regal, even a bit imposing. Never anything about her leg. I mean, of course anyone can tell she limps and can't walk right, but that is _not_ anywhere near the first thing people are going to notice about her. I think we're just overly sensitive to it because, admit it, it hurts us and makes us feel guilty seeing Elsa like that."

Agdar said nothing for a minute, knowing Idun was at least partially right and not wanting to admit it. "I'll talk to Elsa later."

"Just whatever you do, please don't hurt her. I'm going to go check on her now."

* * *

Elsa heard a light knock on her door and just said come in, assuming it was Gerda. The second she realized it was her mother instead, she quickly undid her braid and let her hair fall over her shiner. "Hi, Mama," she said a bit too brightly. _Please don't fuss. I hate it when you do that._

Idun frowned and just gently brushed Elsa's hair away from her face before Elsa could protest. She had already known Elsa was hurt, but it still upset her to see Elsa with her eye nearly swollen shut. _I will not fuss over her; I know she hates that…_ "Elsa, sweetie, don't be embarrassed. It's not your fault, and I already knew about it," Idun said softly. "You're still my beautiful little girl, marks and all." _That Agdar should have protected her better. At least Elsa isn't seriously hurt again. That's the only good thing._

"I…I'm sorry," was all Elsa said in a very small voice.

"What on earth for?!" Idun hugged Elsa close and just began stroking her hair gently, remembering that little Elsa had liked that. She was angry but not surprised when Elsa just said she was sorry because she couldn't fix what her parents thought was wrong with her. "Elsa, I love you just like you are. Please don't beat yourself up like this anymore. _I'm_ sorry I never really defended you when you were little. I'm sorry we didn't manage to find you and Anna before you ever got hurt in the first place. And Elsa? Elsa, please listen to me." Idun paused before adding, "I know what your father told you. He's wrong, sweetie."

"Mama, you think I'm messed up because of my leg, too. Please don't try to deny it just to make me feel better," Elsa whispered. _I know Mama is just trying to help, but…_

"No, I just think your leg is messed up. Not you personally." Idun helped Elsa to her feet and gave her a reassuring smile. "Elsa, you having to wear that brace on your leg does _not_ make me love you any less. I promise. Even though I do hate seeing you like that. And for the record, it doesn't make me think any less of you, either. If anything, it makes me think higher of you because you never complain about it or make excuses or the like." She paused before adding, "And your powers were always there…you were born with them, Elsa. Your father and I had no right or reason to treat you the way we did. And you are not embarrassing."

Elsa didn't smile back; her expression remained neutral. "Papa thinks I am. He _told_ me so," she said quietly.

"Elsa, no. I really don't think that's what he meant, sweetie. He's going to explain to you what he really meant later." Idun hugged Elsa tightly as she added, "I do hope you and Gerda are able to heal it, but I'll try my best not to treat you differently because of it, all right? I'm always worried you need help and you just don't say anything."

Elsa gave her mother a tiny smile and just shrugged. "Mama, it's not anywhere near as horrible as I know you think it is," she said truthfully. "I'm mostly used to it now and it's more of a…a…a minor inconvenience than anything else. The…the only actually awful thing is when I still feel a bit scared sometimes of losing my brace and being trapped somewhere again. But that's because of something bad that happened after the fact, not just because my leg doesn't work properly." _That's the truth. I'm much, much better about that than I used to be, but I still get nervous sometimes._ "I'm going to go find Anna."

 **A/N: Next chapter coming soon!:) I KNOW there won't be as long of a wait for the next chapter because it's almost finished.:P**


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N: Thanks to everyone who's followed/favorited and/or is reading but not reviewing.:)**

 **Elsa Tomago-Well, silly Elsa probably will talk about it again, but I agree; she shouldn't abdicate.:) Agreed. I figured Elsa needed some mommy/daughter time with Idun for once.:)**

 **Olivia O'Neil-Thank you!:)**

 **orang biasa-You're welcome:) Oh, okay.:) Lol, that makes more sense. Sorry about that.:P More of a 'character' chapter, I guess. I want this particular story to be more focused on the characters themselves rather than action/adventure stuff (although a bit of that WILL come later).:) Yeah, I think it's perfectly fine to call Gerda a nanny...technically she kind of WAS to both Elsa and Anna when they were little. Also she's the one who actually gives little Elsa the TLC she needs so much a lot of the time in 'Child of Ska∂i'.:P Lol, the location of Arendelle really doesn't matter 99% of the time in my stories. It's just a mental picture I have of where it is.:) Yes, Canada does know about Arendelle, although they don't have any contact/alliance/trade with Elsa's country. As far as the politics/trade/etc in and around Arendelle, just wait and see.:)**

 **moohamquest-I just figured even with Elsa's magic, there's just no way her leg would randomly get better. It's just not logical. Not to mention I don't think that's a good "message" or whatever you want to call it, although I don't want to be all 'HEY LOOK WHAT A GREAT MESSAGE MY STORY HAS' or anything, lol.:P Thank you.:) Yes, Anna already accepted Elsa's leg, but she still doesn't like it and she still feels guilty about it and therefore wants Elsa's leg healed. That's all. Thank you again, and don't worry about the grammar, lol.:P**

 **On to the story! (Wow, I'm actually updating on time for once...yay:))**

"No, Anikka, you can't mess with that!" Anna exclaimed, snatching the old diary Elsa had given her away from the little girl. "Elsa gave me that and it's special!"

"Elsa say it good t' share," Anikka protested. "I wanna see Elsa writin'. Read t' me, Anna. Please?"

Anna scowled and clutched Elsa's old diary to her chest. _I'm not sharing Elsa's diary with_ anyone. _Not even Kristoff. Elsa wrote in this when she was eight and nine. They're little Elsa's personal thoughts. And I'm not betraying Elsa's trust by letting anyone read or look at it._ "Not this I won't. But I'll read you something else instead," she offered. "Can't you go find Els-actually, no don't do that…she's s'posed to be resting…You could find Eliot and play with him, though. He's not quite two years older than you."

Anikka looked down and scuffed her feet back and forth on the floor. "Eliot hurt bad. I not know how t' play with Eliot," she said quietly.

"Wait a second…I think I have something that might help with that." Anna hopped off her bed, ran over to her closet, and began digging around on the floor, tossing things out of the horrendously messy closet left and right. "Aha, here they are! I'll see if I can find more stuff you guys could play with." She grinned and handed Anikka an armful of her old toys. "There's some toy soldiers and some building blocks. You and Eliot can make a fort or something. Or make a tower out of the blocks and then knock it over on purpose."

Anikka's expression brightened, but she frowned just as quickly. "What if Eliot has troubles doin' somethin' an' tries an'way?"

Anna made a face. _What am I supposed to say? Eliot might be way worse off than Elsa, but it's the same principle. Elsa does that constantly and I'm always not quite sure what to do._ "Anikka, just…just treat Eliot like a normal kid. Better yet go ask Elsa that question. She could answer it better, ok?"

"Isn't Eliot normal already? Anna, you say ' _like_ normal'. That not nice. I tell Elsa on you."

Anna sighed. "That's not what I m-" _Oh no…_ "Hi, Elsa," Anna said brightly, knowing quite well that Elsa had most likely heard a good portion of that conversation from the hall.

* * *

Elsa had been smiling, but now her happy expression faded as she realized just what the conversation she had overheard was about. "Anikka, could you please go play for a little while? I'll come find you soon, I promise. And…and just treat Eliot like you would if he wasn't 'hurt bad', okay?" She waited until Anikka was gone; then shut the door and hesitated before turning back to face her little sister. _Elsa, don't make a scene. You know Anna didn't mean anything. You're not normal anyway. At all._ Elsa finally just asked quietly, "Why couldn't you answer Anikka's question?"

"Well…'cause _you_ do that all the time and I'm never quite sure what to do," Anna replied truthfully. "And I meant 'like a normal kid' because he IS normal, not 'like a normal kid' because he's not. Elsa, please interpret the phrase like I did and not like Anikka did…please?" _Please don't get all upset again._

Elsa didn't smile, but she did suddenly look rather relieved. "Thank you, Anna…I think I understand what you meant. And I do what all the time?" she asked.

"Ok, maybe not _all_ the time. But a lot. Like with the stairs and stuff. I'm always worried you'll slip or something when you insist on walking downstairs-or upstairs, for that matter-instead of using your magic. Even just walking in general…I know it makes your legs tireder than it should. And that brace has got to be uncomfortable anyways. I'm never sure whether I should help you or not," Anna explained. "I _want_ to help, but I don't wanna make you feel helpless or something."

" 'Tireder' isn't a word," Elsa said firmly.

"Stinker."

"Stinker yourself! Anna, in all seriousness though, I think I get it. You're right-my legs do get tired. The good one because it's basically working for both, and the bad one because, well, it's _bad._ About the stairs…it doesn't matter; we have the little ice-elevator I made. I intend to use it." Elsa paused for a moment before continuing, "I don't think my brace is exactly comfortable, but it doesn't itch or anything. And it hasn't given me any rub marks or a rash or anything. It's fine, I promise."

Anna scowled. "I think you're fibbing. You let me try it on that one time and honestly I thought it was awful. Can't bend that leg, can't even stand up from sitting on the floor…I don't know how you put up with it," she muttered. _And it's partly my fault Elsa's hurt like that…_ Anna yelped when she felt a cold something all over her face. "Elsa, you…you stinker! What was the snowball for?!"

Elsa just giggled. "Anna, it didn't even fit you right, for one thing. But besides that, I think if you knew you couldn't walk without wearing a brace like mine, you'd be more than willing to put up with it," she said matter-of-factly. "Also I do have my magic. It helps me a lot. And about needing help…I'll be honest-I probably don't ask for help or accept it as often as I should; but I'm _not_ helpless. I can do so-called 'normal' things too. It just might take me longer or I'll do something differently." Elsa thought for a moment before adding, "I'll make you an offer. If you ever think I need help with something, even if it's something stupid, ask once. Then drop it. I promise I'll do my best to answer a hundred percent truthfully every time. My one caveat is that this _only_ applies to you. I don't think I can stand everyone fussing over me every minute."

"Can I help you with whatever Gerda's helping you do to try to heal it?" Anna asked hopefully. "Please?"

"I…I'd rather you didn't, at least for now," Elsa replied hesitantly. _Anna, please don't be mad…_ "You would either start worrying I might get hurt or you'd get all excited and think I can do something when I can't. I know you."

"What if I promise not to do either of those things?" Anna offered. _I shouldn't keep bothering her…she's going to end up getting all upset again._ "Never mind, Elsa, I won't bug you anymore."

Elsa shook her head. _I should let Anna help. Maybe it would make both of us feel better…me to not be self-conscious and Anna to just accept the possibility that I might not get better._ "No, I…I think maybe I could let you try to help? On a trial basis or something? It…it might be good for both of us. But you can't tell Mama and Papa I'm letting you help me, because then they'll probably want to, too. Not only would Mama fuss and worry too much and Papa make me feel…not good, they're supposed to be getting ready to move to Weselton to take their positions there." She smiled as a sudden idea struck her. "Anna, I think I just came up with a great idea. Do you remember the so-called wine cellar?"

Anna just looked puzzled. "Yeah. And…? It's practically empty because a _certain someone_ hasn't replaced any of it for over three years!"

"Well, that room is fairly small, but if I remember correctly, there's an entrance into the secret passages in one of the walls behind the wine racks that opens into a big room with good-sized ceilings. It looks like it was meant to be a long-term hiding place should the castle ever be invaded. What if we made a pool in there? We could go swimming anytime we wanted without ever leaving home," Elsa explained. "Would you like me to show you?"

Anna grinned. "That sounds completely ridiculous, but I love that idea! Can you show me now?" she asked. Anna made a face, realizing that she didn't even know where the entrance into the passages in her own room was. "Elsa, I don't even know where the secret entrance in my own room is…"

* * *

Elsa took her little sister by the hand and went straight to the hidden entrance. "Here, Anna, just press here…and here at the same time," she instructed. A few seconds later, Anna managed to get the hidden panel to move and Elsa's expression grew sad as she remembered the many, many times she had sat just inside that entrance behind the wall when she'd been isolated from everyone. That spot was the closest she could get to Anna without hurting her. When she felt particularly bad, she could leave her room through the secret passages and come here. "I…I used to sit right here…before," she finally whispered. "I didn't…have anywhere to go, but you…you helped, even though you didn't know I was…here."

Anna scowled and just squeezed Elsa close. "Well, that was years ago, and it's _not_ happening again," she said firmly. Anna suddenly remembered something that had happened a few years before. "Elsa…did you once sing that horrible depressing 'please don't take my sunshine away' song lullaby thing while you were sitting behind that wall?" she asked curiously. "One time I thought I was imagining your voice from somewhere, but it sounded so _real_. I felt kinda silly doing it, but I sang a reply back, and-"

"It was real," Elsa interrupted. She clearly remembered that. She remembered her little sister's exact words, for that matter. _'I'm, like, 99.999 percent sure I imagined your singing, Elsa, but just in case of the one percent chance it was real, listen up. I mean it. I may not be able to be with you, but I'm here for you. Forever.'_ She had felt so, so lonely, but Anna gave her the tiniest bit of hope. Someone _did_ love her, just like she was. Anna hadn't known about Elsa's magic then, but she had known that something was wrong. _Anna still cared even when I was…broken. That Elsa_ was _broken. That's just a fact. But I'm better than that now. Even though I still feel like I'm broken sometimes, I_ am _better. At least I don't want to…die anymore. That's good, isn't it? I actually have different emotions now besides empty and sad or scared ones. I can…well, sometimes…calm myself down from getting upset instead of just trying to lock feelings away._

 _I can actually cry without freezing a room most of the time._ "Anna, I hate crying, but it's nice to actually be able to do so without making an icy mess I don't know how to clean up," Elsa said ruefully.

"You hate crying and you do it all the time," Anna teased as she gave Elsa's hand a reassuring squeeze. Anna's tone turned serious as she added, "I think crying actually helps you, Elsa. I'm not an expert or anything, but there's prob'ly still a lot of…pain inside you, and maybe crying lets it out." She hugged Elsa tightly, hoping the older girl wouldn't get upset or offended at those comments.

Anna needn't have worried; Elsa seemed at least mostly relaxed, and even though she wasn't smiling, she was calm. "Come on, Anna, I'll show you how to get to that secret room I was referring to."

* * *

Less than a minute into the passages, Elsa sighed as she realized she could no longer get around them easily. There were ceilings low enough you had to crawl; there were sharp ninety-degree turns in narrow tunnels; there were hidden ladders and steps. _I should have remembered this. Have I really not been in any of the secret passages since before I hurt my leg? I guess not…_ Elsa had one of her hands occupied holding the blue glow of ice magic to light their way, and that made everything even more awkward for her. "Anna, I'm sorry I keep slowing down... I think we need to bring a regular candle or lantern in here next time. I'm trying, but it's just…not working. My brace keeps getting in the way and I'm worried it'll make us get stuck," she said quietly. "I'm sorry," Elsa repeated.

Anna gave her sister's free hand a comforting squeeze. "Don't apologize. It's not your fault. Maybe-only if you feel up to it, though-we can just go back and you could leave your brace in my room and we'll get a non-magical light and I can just help you," she offered. "At least you wouldn't be worried about getting stuck."

"But I can't walk without it," Elsa countered as the two of them started back toward Anna's room.

"So what? The parts where the ceilings are so low, we have to crawl through anyway. And the rest of the time I'll…I'll carry you. Yeah. That'll work. I'll carry you and you can just give me directions for where to go." Anna could see even in the dim light that her sister looked annoyed.

Sure enough, Elsa's immediate response was, "Anna, you are _not_ carrying me. I'm not a baby or an invalid." _Elsa, she's just trying to help. She wasn't trying to be insulting._

"Elsa, it's all right to need help, you know," Anna said quietly. "And I just-"

"I used to explore and go all over the secret passages before," Elsa muttered, just stopping and sitting leaning against the wall for a minute. "It was one thing I had that I was a bit pleased about. That I had an escape and that I had the entire layout put to memory. Now I can't even maneuver around in here because I'm _crippled,_ " she said bitterly. "I don't even know why I care. I don't need a private escape from a gilded prison anymore."

Anna nearly screamed when their magical blue light suddenly vanished, but she bit it back just in time. _Elsa's right next to me. The little lamp thing she was making just disappeared because she's upset._ She reached hesitantly for her sister's arm and then just held on tightly once she found Elsa. "Elsa, I know you're upset, but it's kinda creepy in here in the dark. Could you please try to make the little magic glow light again? Pretty please?" Quite honestly, Anna felt terrified; it was pitch black and she certainly couldn't find her way out on her own. Anna suddenly squeezed Elsa's arm tighter when she thought about what sort of bugs or other live things might be in here with them. She hated this. She wanted out. _I can't panic. I'll make Elsa panic too if she thinks I'm scared._ "Elsa…please? I don't…I don't like it in here in the dark," Anna added, her voice slightly wavery.

Elsa, on the other hand, didn't particularly care that it was dark. She'd been in the passages without a candle before. She carefully remade her ice-magic light, purposely shoving her own confusing feelings aside. Anna was not supposed to feel scared. Anna was always the one who never got scared. _Elsa_ was the one who was always scared. Elsa gave her little sister a reassuring hug. "The dark can't hurt you, Anna. It's literally the absence of something, which is nothing. 'Nothing' can't hurt you unless you let it," she said softly. "Come on, let's get out of here."

* * *

Once they were back in Anna's room, Anna just said, "I like it when you act big sister-y. You made me feel better when I was kinda sorta maybe scared of something stupid even though you were upset."

Elsa's face instantly lit up at that, and she happily gave her little sister a hug. _I made Anna feel better. I really did._

 _What if Anna suddenly just...wanted to get rid of me? I know those horrible things she said were rooted in truth, and-_

 _Shut up. Shut up, shut up, shut up._ "You know what, why don't we just go downstairs to the wine cellar and get into the secret room I was talking about that way? Then my leg won't be in the way," she said, giving Anna a lopsided smile. "I'm sorry I couldn't guide us through the secret passages very well anymore. Well, not that I got lost, because I didn't…you know what I mean."

Anna scowled. "Elsa, don't apologize for that. If anything, I ought to apologize to you 'cause you got hurt because of me in the first place," she said firmly.

"No, Anna, I did _not_ get hurt because of you. You were trying to rescue me and I ended up saving you instead. How on earth is that your fault?" Elsa asked. She grabbed Anna's hand and headed for the door. "And besides, even if it had been your fault, I wouldn't want you to always be feeling guilty about it. The whole thing was an accident."

* * *

Both sisters stopped in the upstairs hallway when their father asked them what they were doing. When Elsa hesitantly explained her idea about the pool, Agdar merely frowned. "Elsa, a pool sounds like a good idea-I think swimming might help your leg heal some-but not in that secret room. While I doubt we'll ever need to use it, I think you should leave the possibility open," he said sincerely. "Perhaps the back part of the gardens would be better."

Elsa's cheeks turned a bit pink as she explained one of the reasons she wanted an indoor pool. "Papa, you know I get sunburned really easily. If the pool was indoors, that wouldn't be an issue."

" _I_ have an even better idea!" Anna exclaimed. "Make the pool outside where Dad said to, Elsa, but make an ice roof to keep the sun out. That way you wouldn't get burnt. And if you made walls around it, we could all-"

"Absolutely not, Anna," Agdar said firmly. "I know what you're thinking. You aren't eight or nine or however old you were when you did that when your mother and I took you camping. You shouldn't have done that then."

Elsa unsuccessfully stifled a giggle. "She was eight. I remember because she stuck a note under my door that-" _Shut up, Elsa. What if Papa gets mad at you for that? You weren't supposed to have any contact with Anna then. And you were mean to Anna. You told her to go away. And you were jealous._ At eleven, Elsa wouldn't have thought twice about whether skinny dipping was 'appropriate' or not…she just knew she could never do such a thing because she would freeze the water anyway. In the present, twenty-one-year-old Elsa thought she might consider doing that if she were alone, but she was _not_ going to do any such thing if she thought someone might see her, even if that someone was just Anna or her mother or something. Just no, absolutely not.

Agdar looked suspiciously at Anna. "I seem to remember a certain someone outright telling me 'cross my heart and hope to die' that she hadn't spoken to Elsa about that camping trip."

Anna crossed her arms and instinctively stepped protectively in front of Elsa. "Well, that was _wrong_ and _stupid_ and besides I _hadn't_ spoken to Elsa. I left her a note, thank you very much. She should have gotten to come anyways! When I asked you if she could, you said she had been naughty and she was being punished and that was why she couldn't go. _You_ lied! Or wait, technically you didn't, since you _were_ punishing her…only for absolutely nothing!"

"It wasn't 'nothing', Anna. Elsa wouldn't stop freezing things in her room."

"She _couldn't_ , Dad!" Anna spat bitterly, her eyes filling with tears. "Elsa _couldn't_. She didn't know how because her own family kept hurting her. Dad, why? Why would you do that to her?!"

Elsa silently retreated from the situation and just went to her room. Part of her felt like crying her heart out, but another part of her just felt…empty, like all her tears were gone or missing. She just felt…broken. _Why didn't I tell Anna to stop fussing at Papa? Did I secretly_ want _her to chew his ears out? No I didn't. That's not true, either. What's wrong with me?_

 **A/N: Well, Elsa's really upset at the moment, but she'll be okay eventually. I realize she's kind of...backtracked emotionally, but I think that's believable. I should know. *sighs* (Although at least Elsa has actual good reasons for feeling like crap. I will shut up now.) Anyways...**

 **Next chapter coming soon!:)**


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N: Thanks to everyone who's followed/favorited and/or is reading but not reviewing:)**

 **Olivia O'Neil-Not exactly, but he'll be showing up again, and I will be sure to include a scene of Anikka and Eliot playing together next time.:) Elsa's diary will be coming up in the chapter after this one, and I'm glad you like the pool idea.:) Agreed...they do.:/**

 **raven678-I just thought there's no way Elsa _wouldn't_ be self-conscious, at least sometimes, even though her leg doesn't really bother her much...she has to wear a fairly obvious brace on her leg and she can't walk without limping. She just got upset because she remembers how easily and quickly she could get around the secret passages before and now she can't...and thinking about those old painful memories doesn't help either. Don't worry; everything's not going to stay like it is! Agdar mostly got irritated with Anna because she was about to suggest skinny dipping and she half-lied about what she did when they were little...and Agdar still doesn't want to take responsibility for hurting Elsa, even though he knows he should.**

 **Elsa Tomago-Anna also knows that Elsa would be very upset if she found out someone besides Anna read that diary.:/ Elsa needs to teach Anna the secret passages' layout, actually...Anna is plenty old enough to know; she's older than Elsa was when she memorized them. Right now those passages don't hold very good memories for Elsa; she's a bit proud that she has them easily memorized, but mostly it just makes her sad to remember doing things like sitting on the other side of the wall because she couldn't be any closer to Anna.:/ Agdar still doesn't want to verbally take responsibility for what he did to Elsa, even though he knows deep inside it was _not_ Elsa's fault.**

 **On to the story!**

The second Elsa was in her room, she just quietly scooted under her bed, just like she had when she was little. Although she barely fit under there at all now and the space was very cramped, she just lay still, holding her hands clasped together close against her chest. She found herself starting to pick and scratch at the partially healed marks on her arm and abruptly jerked her hand away, letting out a quiet yelp when she bumped her elbow on the bedframe overhead. The next thing she knew, two frightened faces were peeking under the bed at her.

"It just Elsa," Anikka informed Eliot.

"Well…she 'ooks…sad," Eliot responded.

Anikka hopped up and ran over to Gerda, who was half-asleep in the chair in the corner. "Gerda, Elsa need help. Elsa under th' bed hiding," she announced, shaking Gerda's arm.

Elsa's cheeks turned red. The last thing she wanted was for anyone to find her hiding like that, especially Gerda. Elsa hadn't retreated under her bed in years; she simply didn't fit under there very well anymore. _Why did I come under here? I didn't need to do that._ Elsa felt two familiar hands reach for her and simply drag her out, and she didn't make any protest.

Gerda shooed the two young children out and then looked back at Elsa, who was now just sitting quietly on her bed, her shoulders drooped forward as she just stared at the floor. _I don't want to disrespect her, but…I'll just take care of this until she finally orders me otherwise. Elsa_ needs _to make some actual orders, and I'll make her practice on me. That will be good for her._ Gerda shut the door and then went straight back to Elsa. "Miss Elsa, if you're going to act like a child, then you are going to be treated like one. It's time for your therapy for today." She reached for Elsa's foot to start unfastening her brace.

Elsa instantly scowled and quickly took it off herself. _Gerda, I don't know what you're doing, but please stop. I don't like it. I want a hug. I don't want to mess with my stupid leg right now._

 _Elsa, you_ are _being childish. You literally_ hid under the bed _. Why did you do that?_

"Now go put on some more suitable clothes, like the outfits you and your sister had for dance lessons when you were little," Gerda told her, knowing full well Elsa didn't own such a thing.

"I don't have one." _And you are and were terrible at dancing, Elsa,_ a gleeful negative voice informed her.

"Make one with your magic, then," Gerda said firmly. "I'll leave and stay in the bathroom for one minute so you can change and make a new outfit."

Elsa frowned, unsure what she was supposed to make exactly. With exactly one minute to figure it out, she quickly decided to just let her magic figure that part out.

* * *

When Gerda came back the promised one minute later, she actually smiled when she saw Elsa. "I didn't say to make a bathing suit like that… _thing_ you went swimming in last summer, except with a skirt, but that will do," she said in a not-quite-stern voice that didn't match the motherly smile she gave Elsa. Gerda quite honestly thought Elsa looked like a little fairy.

Elsa made a face, feeling self-conscious. "Well, this was _not_ what I wanted. My magic did it," she muttered. In Elsa's mind, she looked mostly okay, but she hated her legs showing. At least she wouldn't have any long skirts or flowy capes to get in the way with whatever Gerda intended to have her work on for her leg. Elsa just blinked in surprise when she heard what Gerda said next.

"Come here without using your magic and look at yourself in the mirror," Gerda repeated.

"I _can't walk_." Elsa stayed put where she was, still staring at the floor, balling her hands into icy fists in annoyance. Suddenly she wanted to just break something. What was wrong with her? At least she wasn't crying. That was good, wasn't it?

"You can't _walk_ over here, no, but I didn't tell you or expect you to do that. Now come here, Miss Elsa," Gerda replied. She forced back a smile when she saw Elsa start making a face. Elsa was starting to look rather irritated, but she still didn't move or order Gerda to stop telling her what to do. _Elsa, please. I'm just trying to help you. You can't give up. I don't what you heard or what you're thinking, but I want you to know you're not broken for any reason, inside or out._

"I am _not_ crawling across my room in front of you, Gerda," Elsa said now. "It's _embarrassing._ "

"Then don't. I'm sure you can think of something, Miss Elsa." Gerda waited a few seconds; then just sat down in the chair in the corner. "I will be right here for you when you're ready." Gerda dearly wanted to just give the girl a reassuring hug, but she was determined to force Elsa to do things by herself without anyone or anything-like her magic-helping her and also simply take control of the situation and act like the queen she was. Already she could tell Elsa was thinking about what she should do. She could see yellow-tinged "angry" ice forming under Elsa's feet, far less beneath her bad one, but it was there nonetheless.

Elsa finally just sighed and pulled herself to her feet, steadying herself with one hand on the bedpost and being careful not to put the least bit of weight on her bad leg. _The trouble is I can't pick up that foot well enough to get it out of the way. Otherwise I could just hop over to the mirror…_ Still clutching the bedpost, she tentatively tried to put a bit of weight on her bad leg, but it immediately collapsed under her. Then she tried to just pick up that foot so she could try her original idea. To her surprise, it worked. Just barely, but it did work. Now feeling a bit more confident, Elsa let go of the bedpost and made her way over to the mirror. Just before reaching it, her left foot awkwardly brushed the carpet sideways and she lost her balance. _Well, I_ almost _made it._

"Get up, Miss Elsa," Gerda said instantly. "Don't touch anything except the floor. No magic yet. Use your balance instead."

After several failed tries, Elsa just stayed crumpled on the carpet, her blue eyes beginning to fill with frustrated tears. _Gerda, I'm trying, but I can't. I don't know why, but I can't._

"Miss Elsa, I _know_ you can do it," Gerda said in a gentler tone. "Try one more time, and this time picture yourself succeeding, not-"

"Gerda, _stop_!" Elsa exploded finally. Angry tears streamed down her cheeks as she stared at Gerda. "Just stop! Stop telling me I can do things when I can't! Stop ordering me around! Picturing myself succeeding is easy for you to say-you're not the one with the weak leg that made it so she couldn't get away from…something awful. And stop treating me like a little kid. I'm s'posed to be the queen. You can't do that! Leave me alone!"

"Are you ordering me to do that, Miss Elsa?" Gerda asked quietly. She looked Elsa right in the eyes without waiting for a reply as she added, "Look at what you're doing now, Elsa Ingrid Nicoletta Grieg. You just stood up without even realizing it."

The icy spikes forming around Elsa almost immediately receded. "I'm sorry, Gerda. I didn't mean to…to act like that," she apologized. "I don't want you to leave, but I wouldn't blame you if you did." _I really did stand up by myself without using my magic from sitting on the floor._ Elsa felt herself wobbling, and this time she felt familiar hands just hug her tightly.

"Don't worry, Miss Elsa, I'm not leaving," Gerda assured Elsa, just holding her by the hands to steady her. "I just wanted you to realize two things. That you are _not_ completely helpless without someone or something like your brace or your magic helping you, even if that leg never gets better. And that you can-and should!-use your authority sometimes." She paused before continuing, "Also, I promise you right now I will never, ever expect you to do something I know you can't do. I will not ask you to do something unless I know you can do it. And, Miss Elsa, I wasn't there in that cave when Jade hurt you and made Anna do so. I don't know exactly what happened, although I have a good idea. I don't want to minimize what happened to you, but-"

"I...it…it wasn't Jade so much…Gerda, what if…what if…" Elsa tried her best to take a deep breath and just calm down, her breathing feeling all shaky and wobbly. _I can't talk right now. What is wrong with me?_ She could feel herself trembling all over, and she vaguely wondered why Gerda was still holding her hands. Surely she was too cold to touch right now. _Elsa, stop it. You're acting ridiculous. Stop it and calm down. This is not a good reason to freak out._

 _Yes it is…_

 _No, you're just being stupid, Elsa. STOP IT._

 _I can't. I don't know how. Make it stop…please…just…I hate this and I wish I'd quit thinking like this and I feel horrible and why is the room spinning and…_ "I…I feellikeI'mgoingtothrowup," she blurted suddenly.

"Just hold on, Miss Elsa," Gerda said calmly. She quickly wrapped a blanket around Elsa so she wasn't so cold to hold and then just laid her on the bed. "Slow breaths, Miss Elsa, slow breaths." Gerda ran into the bathroom and grabbed the bucket from under the sink and came right back. She simply sat next to Elsa and helped her sit up. "The bucket is right here if you need it. You are safe, Miss Elsa. Safe at home with people that love and care about you."

Elsa didn't verbally respond, but she didn't resist when Gerda hugged her. Hugs felt nice. They made her feel safer. _What if you hurt Gerda? You don't maintain control when you freak out._

As if reading Elsa's mind, Gerda said, "You are not going to hurt me, Miss Elsa. Yes, you are a little cold to hold; yes, you are making snowflakes. But there's a blanket around you and snowflakes are harmless." Gerda could tell Elsa was starting to calm down a bit now; she wasn't hyperventilating so much, even though she was still cold and shaky all over.

Elsa didn't feel downright sick anymore, but her chest hurt, her head was spinning, and she could still feel herself shaking. She could see snowflakes floating around her, and she wished this would just _stop._ "I…h-hate having…these attacks," she whispered. "It…feels…horrible." Elsa flinched when she heard a knock on her door. _That's Papa. I know it is._

Without a word, Gerda went straight to the door, looked out, and just said, "Queen Elsa is indisposed at the moment, Mr. Grieg," and shut the door again, this time locking it behind her. Then she went back to Elsa. "Miss Elsa, you don't get those attacks for no reason. Something triggered it and you know exactly what it is, too. Can you perhaps try to tell me the 'what if' was that made you so upset? If not, that's all right. Say it when you're ready."

"What if…what if…" Elsa scrunched her eyes shut and shook her head, annoyed with herself for being unable to verbally say what she wanted to say. _Elsa, just spit it out._ "I…I'm…what if…what if Anna d-didn't want m-me…around…anymore? What if she wants t-to…get r-rid of m-me? I…I know it wasn't…really…Anna, but…I also know it w-was rooted in truth, a-and…" _I hate this. Why am I stuttering? I thought I got over that. And now I feel exhausted…_

"Miss Elsa, why on earth would she want to do such a thing? Just think about it. Do you _really_ think your little sister would do something that cruel?" Gerda asked gently.

Elsa shook her head. "But…but that doesn't mean Anna wouldn't ever _want_ to," she said softly. "I know _I_ want to get rid of me sometimes. I'm messed up and I cause trouble. I tried to do something special with Anna earlier and I couldn't. I just…I don't know." _I'm just tired of this. Tired of trying to fix, well, me. Anna is only human. She_ has _to get tired of me sometimes…_

"If you were in your sister's place, would you want to get rid of your big sister because she has emotional issues and a weak leg along with her magic?" Gerda asked matter-of-factly. "Keep in mind this girl is also a bit mischievous and is your best friend."

A tiny smile flitted across Elsa's face at that. "No. If I was being completely honest with myself, I might get tired of trying to take care of her, though. But I'd love her all the same. And…and Gerda, Anna doesn't need me for a best friend. She makes friends with everyone."

"It doesn't matter, Miss Elsa. I've had that sister of yours tell me many times that you are her best friend. She loves you very much and you know it. I can understand if you're still scared from what happened, but it's _not_ rational," Gerda said firmly. "Now let's try to take care of that leg properly, if that's all right. We'll just do less today since I know you're probably tired now."

"Okay."

* * *

"Elsa, are you all right today?" Anna asked the next morning after Nikoleta and Eliot had left. "You seem…tired. Like really, really tired. Did you stay up late last night?"

Elsa gave her little sister a sideways glance. "Not exactly," she said vaguely. "Come on, Anikka, let's go see how we can make that pool," Elsa said, changing the subject. She, Anna, Kiara, and Anikka were all heading out to the back gardens so Elsa could create the pool.

"C'n I have a piggyback ride?" Anikka asked hopefully.

"I can try." Elsa let the little girl climb on her back, but she was more than certain she wouldn't be able to carry Anikka like that for very long. Sure enough, just as they reached the edge of the castle gardens, Elsa slipped when she tripped on the edge of one of the stepping stones. "Don't touch me," she said flatly. "Anikka, are you all right?"

Anikka nodded and just stood awkwardly, unsure whether she should try to help Elsa or not. Something was wrong. The older girl almost seemed…angry about something.

Kiara and Anna traded glances as Elsa easily plopped herself back on her feet using her magic to do so. "Elsa, are you all right?" Anna asked quietly. "It looks like you scraped up your knee and palm pretty bad."

"I don't care. I'm fine." Quite honestly, the scrapes stung quite a bit, but Elsa ignored it. Scrapes weren't going to prevent her from doing anything. She sighed and scanned the gardens, looking for the perfect area to make the pool. _There. Next to those half-dead trees. It won't matter if I damage their roots._

"Mom's gonna be upset if she finds out you didn't get yourself taken care of. And Gerda would prob'ly say those need to-"

"Anna, I said I was _fine_!" Elsa impulsively threw an ice blast straight up into the air as hard as she could just to prove her point. When seconds passed and no ice or snow came back down, Elsa's blue eyes went wide. _What did I just do? A large ice blast like that doesn't just disappear. Where did it go?_

Kiara raised one eyebrow skeptically. "Hey, Elsa, what'd you do, send it to the moon?" she teased, only half-joking.

Elsa tilted her face toward the sky and closed her eyes, trying to sense where the blast of magic had gone, but she couldn't feel anything. Maybe it had made such a huge parabolic path that it had landed somewhere out of the country. Or…she blinked in surprise when it abruptly began raining. Elsa's cheeks turned pink in embarrassment as she glanced at the other three girls. "I think I know what happened," she said finally. "I…made it rain. It's too warm for ice and snow naturally, and I…I shot that blast so high and I wasn't purposely trying to direct or control it…"

"So the snow or ice or whatever turned to water and you made it rain," Anna finished, giggling. "This rain _is_ awfully cold water…I wonder how far it spread?"

Elsa wanted to sink into the ground and just disappear when she realized just what exactly she had done. It was raining. Around the castle. _Only_ around the castle. _This is what I get for doing stupid things on impulse because I felt angry and upset._ She wanted to just make the rain stop immediately, but she didn't know how to do that since it wasn't just her magic that had caused it…it was her magic combined with natural input. "Do…do you want to just try the pool idea later?" Elsa asked.

"I don't care. We're all already wearing swimming clothes and we're going to get wet anyway if we go swimming," Kiara said, shrugging. "I say go ahead."

* * *

Elsa nodded and carefully walked around the area in a rectangle, marking the perimeter of the potential pool with a path of ice. "Do you think that's big enough?" she called to the others. She eyed the path she had made, gauging how big it was. _About fifteen feet by twenty-five feet, I'd say…I think that's plenty large enough._

Anna ran over to Elsa and just said quietly, "I think you and Gerda already made your leg a bit better. You made part of your little path with your bad one…not actually half of it like you'd do before, but some all the same. I was watching." When Elsa just stared at her and didn't reply, Anna added, "That was supposed to be a compliment, Elsa."

"If this gives you some context, I've been able to make an ice footprint path for as long as I can remember. That would make me about three, and I'm sure I did it before then too." The annoyed edge disappeared from Elsa's voice as she added softly, "It feels downright strange when I try to channel my magic through that leg. It's not…instinctively easy anymore. It's like it _does_ still flow through that part of me and…gets stuck. Or it's weaker or something, I don't know." _And that probably makes absolutely no sense whatsoever._

"But Elsa, isn't the fact that you can still feel your magic inside it good? I mean, I understand that it doesn't feel 'right' to you, but still."

Elsa just shrugged and went back to concentrating on just how she wanted to make their pool so it would be safe and permanent. She couldn't do anything about her leg right this second, but she knew she could make the pool. She would just do that. _If I make it in-ground, it'll both look better and will be more secure…I just need to remove all the dirt and grass in the sectioned-off area, line the hole with impenetrable unbreakable ice, and then freeze water from the fjord so I can transport it and then turn it back to liquid again._ "Wait…no, then the water will be filthy. We _have_ gone swimming in the fjord, but I would rather have clean water…" Elsa smiled as she looked up at the sky. _I'll 'make it rain' again, and this time it will be only above the pool._

Anna clapped her hands in delight as she watched Elsa close her eyes and stomp her good foot, making ice slice down into the earth around the perimeter of the pool area. Elsa carefully swiped one hand straight in front of her, palm up, knowing she was forming the 'floor' of the pool. Then she bit her lip as she repeated the same sequence of motions, this time adding a second motion with her other hand, freezing over the surface of the grass. "Okay, Anna, Kiara, Anikka, you need to back up against the trees," she announced firmly. "If I mess up, I don't want to drop this on you." Elsa knew she had managed to separate the entire section of dirt and grass and encase the whole thing in ice, but she was a bit worried her plan wouldn't work. That amount of earth would be very heavy, and while Elsa knew her magic would 'pick up' things she wouldn't be able to move, let alone lift, otherwise, she hadn't attempted this particular maneuver before. If she did drop it, she would probably quite literally crush herself underneath it if she didn't protect herself quickly enough.

Elsa smiled proudly as the entire rectangular 'cube' of earth lifted right out under her magic's direction. Keeping herself carefully focused on what she was doing, she managed to direct the whole thing over her head. She planned to toss it in the fjord, but that was a little ways away and she was worried she wouldn't be able to throw it that far. _Stay calm, Elsa. You're doing fine. Now the hard part…_ Elsa tried her best to ignore the other girls' cheering as she slowly shifted the control to one hand. _I have to move quickly. I can already feel my arm getting tired…_ Although her magic was supporting most of the weight, she could still feel that she was "carrying" something heavy, as if it were simply a heavy box she could barely pick up. In one smooth motion, she directed herself onto the lower part of the castle roof with her free hand and managed to throw the whole thing out over into the fjord not half a second before her braced leg slid out from under her and made her fall. _Snow. Need snow to land in,_ she thought just in time.

Elsa lay flat on her back in the soft powdery pile of snow she'd landed in breathing hard, quite honestly feeling rather pleased with herself for succeeding. _I did it. I really did it. Not perfectly, but I did do it._

 **A/N: Yes, Elsa is working on making a pool.:) At the moment, she and the others have an empty pool fifteen feet wide, twenty-five feet long, and four to six feet in depth. Elsa just needs to figure out how to get clean water into it now.:P**

 **I hope Elsa's construction details make sense...basically she lifted all the dirt and the like out in one go because she had it covered in ice. I wanted to show that Elsa's magic is already stronger than it was right after the Great Thaw simply because she's been using it. To be fair, what Elsa just did was difficult for her and she wouldn't be able to hold something that large with her magic for any length of time.**

 **Next chapter coming soon:)**


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N: Thanks to everyone who's followed/favorited and/or is reading but not reviewing:)**

 **Elsa Tomago-I PMed you, so I won't make you reread the same thing here:)**

 **moohamquest-You're welcome:) Gerda knows Elsa has a nasty tendency to underestimate herself, so she actually forced her to do something that would make her think a bit differently:)**

 **Olivia O'Neil-Elsa can't create that much water herself; it's difficult for her to just make a little bit of actual liquid water. And yes, besides that, I don't think anyone except Elsa herself would want to go swimming in water not much warmer than freezing.:P**

 **orang biasa-Kiara is leaving very, very soon, as are Elsa's parents. (within the next couple chapters soon:)) Thank you:)**

 **raven678-Gerda just sees Elsa as...Elsa, and she really cares about her, too. So...yeah.:) The rain will stop naturally since Elsa is not continuing to "feed" it with releasing more ice blasts. I think so too:)**

 **On to the story:)**

"I think it's going to take a long, long time if I just try to "make it rain", so…Anna, are you up for receiving some temporary water powers again?" Elsa asked, smiling. It was difficult for Elsa create water on purpose, but when she did and another person drank it, it would give that person temporary water powers that lasted about five days, more or less.

Anna grinned. "Absolutely." She watched excitedly as Elsa easily made a small mug made of ice and then carefully and slowly created the water to fill it. "Hey, Elsa, can you-"

" _Anna!_ " Elsa scolded in frustration. The second Anna had distracted her the tiniest bit, the water she was making instantly turned to ice instead. Elsa knew she simply wasn't 'made' to control water very well, but she also knew she should be able to make enough to just fill up an average-sized mug. _Okay, Elsa. Stay completely calm. That book from the trolls said for an ice mage to control water at all, he or she needs to be calm and simply have intense concentration skills. I have the second part, but…_ She closed her eyes and tried again, shutting out all the external input around her, and this time she succeeded. "Here, Anna."

Anna eagerly drank the entire mug in only three gulps; then looked quizzically at her sister. "How long before-oh wait, never mind. Not very long at all. I forgot; I can already feel it starting to work." Although Anna knew the temporary magic flowing through her wasn't the same as what Elsa felt every second of her life, she liked that it gave her at least some idea of what having magic like Elsa would be like. Anna's body wasn't nearly as attuned to the unique sensation in the first place, and it wasn't inherently tied to her like Elsa's ice powers were tied to Elsa, but still. She also noticed something different from the last time Elsa had done this.

This time Anna could almost sense her sister's emotions somehow. And the odd 'magic sensation' was nearly absent from Anna's left leg, which Anna was quite sure was similar for Elsa herself. _No wonder Elsa said it felt strange to her to not have her magic channeling through her leg properly. I'd think the same thing if magic flowing through me was my normal._ "Elsa…did you do something different?" Anna asked curiously.

Elsa just looked puzzled. "No, why?"

"Um…I don't know…I kinda…sense how you're feeling? Magic-wise, not 'cause I'm reading your face, either. And…and I think I know what you meant when you said your magic didn't feel right in your bad leg. 'Cause the weird magic sensation doesn't feel the same in my left leg…" Anna had no idea how to explain what she meant, but she did her best.

Now Elsa just looked horrified. _What have I done?! What if I messed up Anna's leg? How is this even happening? All I did was give a bit of water to Anna…_ She backed away and began clasping her hands together close to her chest, determined not to cause any more damage. If she messed up anything else, her palms were pointed at herself and therefore no one else would get hurt. "Anna, I'm sorry! I don't know how to undo it and-"

"Elsa, I'm fine," Anna interrupted hurriedly. "Look." She began jumping up and down and then ran over to her sister. "See, I'm fine."

Elsa still wasn't entirely convinced. "Can you still hop on that foot?" she asked hopefully, still feeling tense all over. _Anna better be okay. It's one thing if I can't walk properly; it's quite another if my little sister can't._

Anna easily demonstrated that she could before simply hugging Elsa tightly before she could protest. "Don't you dare start thinking you're dangerous and you 'hurt me again', you stinker," she said firmly. "You always assume the worst about things. Stop that. And whatever you did kinda just proves your magic is already more precise and stronger than it was last year, which is pretty cool, no pun intended." _Besides, even if she_ did _hurt my leg, I wouldn't have any right to get upset about that…Elsa's leg got hurt because she was trying to rescue me…_ "Come on, sis, let me go fill up the pool, and then we can go swimming."

* * *

A few minutes later, the pool was full of water, and both Anna and Kiara immediately jumped in the deep end. Elsa was still at the shallow end with Anikka, and she kept dipping one foot in and then taking it right back out, feeling worried she might make the water too cold for the others simply by being in it. She (mostly) trusted herself not to actually _freeze_ it, but she didn't trust herself not to make the water too cold.

Anikka just sat on the steps in the shallow end and frowned as she watched Elsa. "Elsa scared she can't swim?" she asked curiously. Anikka herself wasn't a very good swimmer. She wouldn't drown if someone just dropped her in the water, but she wasn't comfortable going past where she could stand up.

"No…I can swim fine." Elsa finally just sat down at the pool's edge and pulled her legs to her chest. She would just come swimming later, so if she did alter the pool's temperature, it wouldn't matter. _I feel silly and exposed like this…_ Elsa felt painfully self-conscious about the way her bad leg looked, even though she knew the others weren't going to pick on her for it.

Anna noticed what her sister was doing and quickly swam over to her. "Elsa, come on. It's all right," she said quietly. Before Elsa could protest, Anna grabbed her by the arm and just yanked her in. "See, Elsa? Everything's fine. You didn't freeze the water or make it freezing cold." Quite honestly, Anna could easily feel that Elsa had made the water _slightly_ chilly, but she brushed it off and attributed it to the fact that she'd yanked Elsa in without warning and startled her. Well…maybe a bit more than slightly, but still. "Do…do you need help?" Anna asked hesitantly.

Elsa shook her head instantly, but she was smiling a bit now. "Thank you, Anna." In the water, she was still very aware that her left leg wasn't working properly, but she also didn't feel the least bit helpless or anything like she did on dry land without her brace. Elsa gave Anna a lopsided smile and tagged Anna on the shoulder. "You're 'it'. Anikka is 'safe'. Kiara and I can only stay on 'safe' for ten seconds," she said quickly; then dove underwater and swam towards the deep end.

"No fair, Elsa!" Anna squealed. Then she hesitated. Should she take it easy on Elsa? She watched Elsa for a few seconds and frowned. Anna could tell her sister was quite a bit slower than she'd been when they went swimming last, but otherwise Elsa seemed perfectly at home in the water.

"Don't you dare take it easy on me, Anna," Elsa called from the deep end. "If I end up needing help for some reason, I'll tell you. I promise." She giggled as she watched Kiara start sneaking quietly past Anna.

"What's so funny?" Anna asked, but Elsa only pointed past her in response. She went after Kiara and just barely tagged her on the foot before Kiara reached Anikka.

"Kiara's out," Anikka announced.

Anna turned her attention back on Elsa, but the older girl had seemingly disappeared.

* * *

Elsa had already known she couldn't swim faster than Anna anymore, so she'd decided she would have to use another strategy to keep Anna from catching her. So Elsa had gone to the deep end, dove down to the bottom, and just stayed curled up in one corner, making herself as small and inconspicuous as possible. She knew she sort of blended in with the pool walls, although if Anna had been looking for it, Elsa's ice-blue bathing suit sparkled in the least bit of light, unlike the pool walls. Elsa also knew that her little sister didn't like opening her eyes underwater, although she could if she had to.

"Anna, she's not gonna come back up for air," Kiara reminded Anna. "Elsa can still breathe underwater 'cause of that one time…"

"Well, she can't stay underwater forever," Anna said stubbornly, slightly annoyed that Elsa wasn't playing the game properly in her mind. She finally spotted Elsa in the bottom corner of the deep end and started swimming over to her.

Just before Anna reached her and dove down to try to tag her, Elsa just scooted along the edge of the pool, still staying on the bottom. Now she was 'hidden' in the other corner of the deep end.

Anna huffed in annoyance, but she wasn't surprised. "Kiara, she moved! Where's Elsa now?" Before Kiara could answer, Anna spotted Elsa and tried to tag her again, but Elsa was easily prepared and she scooted out of the way again. Anna sensed from Elsa's magic that Elsa seemed _awfully_ pleased with herself. The same thing happened over and over, Anna almost catching Elsa and Elsa managing to get away at the last second. "Elsa, this isn't fair!" Anna shouted, although she knew Elsa probably wouldn't really hear her. She realized the two of them were slowly moving towards the shallower water and a new idea struck her. _I'll just catch her unexpectedly by diving in. That should work._ Before rethinking that idea through, that that probably wasn't a good idea in six feet of water, she quickly hopped out and then dove back in.

Sure enough, the unexpected direction made it so Anna could easily tag Elsa…but she also landed hard on her hands on the bottom. Elsa suddenly realized just what had happened-that Anna had caught her but probably hurt herself in the process. Elsa popped up to the surface, her blue eyes worried. "Anna, are you okay? I'm sorry I-"

"Elsa, that wasn't fair! You can't just hide underwater just 'cause you can! I can't do that and neither can Kiara. You just did that 'cause you knew you'd lose otherwise with that crippled leg of yours! I don't know why I both-" Anna abruptly shut her mouth, knowing she was just saying those things because she'd been frustrated and now her wrist hurt, but the words had already been said.

"A-Anna?" Tears slowly began trickling down Elsa's cheeks as she scrambled out of the water as fast as she could. What had she done wrong? Wasn't it okay to do something she _could_ do to help with the game if she wasn't very good at playing it normally anymore? Why was Anna mad at her? Did Anna really think that…disdainfully about her because of her leg? _Elsa, stop it. Maybe Anna's acting like that because she's hurt. That would explain it._ "Anna, are y-you hurt?" Elsa asked shakily. "Is that why you're mad at m-me?"

Kiara helped Anna climb out and then just said matter-of-factly, "You guys should have made the rules clearer or something. Elsa, I'll go inside with Anna. You and Anikka can just come in whenever…I'll come knock on your door in about a half hour or so."

* * *

The second both Anna and Kiara were out of sight, Anikka hopped out of the water and ran over to Elsa. "Anna all right. Anna just land on hand funny," she tried to assure Elsa. "Not Elsa's fault."

Elsa put her arms around the little girl and just hugged her tightly. Logically she knew even if Anna _was_ hurt, Anna would be fine, but she still felt bad because it was mostly her fault Anna had dove into the too-shallow part of the pool like that. "I _did_ do that because I knew I'd lose otherwise," she said softly. "I just…thought it was okay…"

" _I_ think it was ok," Anikka replied. She pulled herself out of Elsa's arms; then went to get the older girl's brace and brought it back to her. "Let's us go back inside. More swimming later?" she suggested. Anikka scowled when she noticed the scrapes on Elsa's right palm and knee. "Anna right. You got owies," she announced, pointing.

Elsa merely shrugged. "Well, those owies don't keep me from doing anything, so they don't matter." She paused before blurting, "Anikka, I _hate_ my leg sometimes. It makes me feel uglier than I am already." _Why did I say that? I don't mind it at all most of the time. It's just…just…I don't know. And I shouldn't tell Anikka that anyway._

Anikka made a face. "That an Elsa secret. I not tell anyone." Then she added, "Elsa is not ugly. Elsa is pretty. 'Sides, you tol' me it what inside that counts. 'Sides _that_ , I 'member when Elsa's leg not hurt. Still just Elsa anyways." Anikka paused, trying her best to figure out how to explain what she wanted to say. "I…I see th' brace on Elsa's leg, but…but it…it not what I see first? I see Elsa first. Like…like _just_ Elsa." Anikka pointed at her own heart and then at Elsa. "This part. You make me happy an' you help people." After a minute's more consideration, she went on, "I not think you think perm'nent owie makes you ugly. I think other people makes you sad."

To Anikka's disappointment, Elsa just seemed to crumple further into herself, like something else had crossed her mind and just made her feel worse all of a sudden. She wasn't outright crying, but her big blue eyes were bright with unshed tears and it seemed like she was trying not to start shaking. Anikka took Elsa's hand and began tugging her back toward the castle. "C'mon, Elsa not need t' be shaking. Elsa be all right," the little girl tried to help.

* * *

Inside, Gerda scolded Anna for diving into too-shallow water and made her get in bed and stay there. Unlike Elsa, Anna was willing to let others fuss over her if she was hurt. Who would turn down meals in bed and extra treats? "That's what you get for doing that, princess. You know better than that-you knew not to do that when you were little. You're lucky you just sprained a wrist; you could have broken your neck doing that," Gerda told her.

"Where's Elsa? I kind of…made her upset," Anna muttered. "I wasn't very nice to her."

"I'm not sure, Miss Anna, but I'll go find her," Gerda replied.

Anna's blue-green eyes suddenly looked up at Gerda in alarm. "Gerda, please go get Elsa now! There's something wrong-she's really upset. I can feel it, and-" Anna cut herself off, close to feeling sick. The odd magic sensation inside her right this second wasn't her temporary water powers; it was Elsa. And Elsa was upset, so upset that it hurt. Anna just curled up on her side, tears dripping down her cheeks, and not because of the way the magic felt, either. Was this a taste of how Elsa felt _every single time_ she got upset? The nasty feeling intensified, and Anna suddenly knew why Elsa wished she were 'normal'. This was _not_ pleasant; it was awful. It was like feeling upset but physically inwardly reacting to it.

Gerda came back with Elsa in her arms a few seconds later and gently laid her down on the bed next to Anna. "I found Miss Elsa crumpled on the floor in the hallway," Gerda said quietly. "Miss Anna, do you want me to help, or…"

"I'll help her," Anna replied instantly. She started to put one arm around Elsa, but Elsa scooted away, saying Anna shouldn't feel like she had bother with her if she didn't want to. "Elsa, what are you talking about? Of course I want to help you," Anna said firmly.

Cold was radiating from Elsa's body in waves, and she was shaking all over. Why had Gerda brought her in here? Anna didn't want her. She was nothing but a bother-Anna had _said_ it. Not completely, but she'd started to. Elsa had felt so scared that Anna just wouldn't want anything to do with her anymore, that Anna would just want to throw her away. She didn't know what she was supposed to be doing, but she wasn't supposed to be here. She didn't want to bother Anna anymore. She'd caused Anna to get hurt again.

Anna jumped out of bed and grabbed an extra comforter from her messy closet and then just wrapped Elsa up in it tightly. "Elsa, please. Please try to calm down. Please don't cry anymore. Whatever it is, it's all right." Pained blue eyes blinked up at her, the same ones Anna had seen on the way home after their father had rescued them from Jade's cave. "Elsa?" Anna asked hesitantly. Something was wrong. Anna had seen her sister go through a panic attack multiple times, and this wasn't the same. Not exactly. What was she supposed to do?

"Please…d-don't…throw…m-me away. I…don't…know why…y-you bother…either…but _please_ d-don't…throw me…away… _please…_ " Elsa was no longer struggling to get away from Anna, but her broken pleas made Anna's heart ache. Elsa just lay limp and passive wrapped up in the comforter as Anna scooped her up and clutched her tightly.

"Shh, Elsa, it's ok. Everything's all right. I'm not sure exactly what scared you and made you upset so much, but I promise I don't want to 'throw you away' and I'm not going to. Those mean things I said weren't true. I was frustrated and my wrist hurt, that's all. I _promise_ that's all," Anna tried to assure Elsa. She wasn't even sure Elsa had heard and understood her until a cold trembling hand wiggled out from inside the comforter.

"Pinky promise?" Elsa's blue eyes still looked more than a little scared, she was still shaking, and tears streaked her pale cheeks all over, but she sounded at least slightly hopeful now. _Please? I know it's silly, but we always said pinky promises could never be broken when we were little…_

Anna smiled as she willingly linked her warm pinky with Elsa's very, very cold one. "Pinky promise," she agreed. Anna paused before adding, "And just to add, you owe me a swimming race. A regular one. Because after watching you in the pool today, I think you're underestimating yourself."

"I'm…sorry… _tried_ not to, but…happened anyway…won't do something stupid…again…no…bother anymore?" Elsa's garbled words didn't quite make sense to Anna, but she just continued holding the older girl securely until she seemed completely calm again. _I don't know what made you so scared and upset exactly, but you're safe, Elsa. And I'm not going to leave you alone. So there._

Elsa took a deep breath before saying a few minutes later, "I'm sorry, Anna. I _tried_ not to get all panicky and upset-I really did, but I just…couldn't. And I won't do something stupid next time we play tag in the pool, and I'll try not to be a bother anymore. I'm sorry you always end up taking care of me." _There. I said it properly this time…_

Anna scowled at that. "Don't apologize for getting upset and panicking. You couldn't help it-you just said so. And next time we play tag in the pool, we will make clearer rules. Besides, technically you weren't doing anything wrong." She paused before adding, "Elsa, you are _not_ a bother. I wish you wouldn't call yourself that anymore. And I don't mind taking care of you."

Elsa didn't answer; she'd fallen asleep almost instantly, exhausted from all the energy she'd used up scaring herself and panicking.

Anna carefully laid Elsa back down beside her before flopping down on her side herself, one arm tossed protectively around her sister. _That's not happening again. Never, ever. I bet that was a fear Elsa's been carrying around since that cave thing and it just finally exploded. She's going to be fine. I'm going to be fine. So there._

 **A/N: This is probably one of the last times poor Elsa will end up getting that upset...just saying.:) At least she finally got the worry she's been carrying around out.**

 **Next chapter coming soon:)**


	12. Chapter 12

**A/N: Thanks to everyone who's followed/favorited and/or is reading but not reviewing:)**

 **Olivia O'Neil-Thank you:) I agree-Anna isn't very good at controlling her temper and she needs to get better at it:P And me too...I'm glad Elsa won't get that upset anymore too:)**

 **Elsa Tomago-That was one reason why I let Elsa's magic be able to do that:) Anna wasn't thinking about that right then; she just wanted Elsa to calm down and feel better:/ She'll apologize in this chapter:)**

 **orang biasa-Elsa's leg bothers her because she knows others treat her differently because of it. Also she's a little frustrated because she _knows_ her magic can help her leg get better, even if it's not _completely_ better. Anikka is pretty good at reading Elsa when she's unhappy, much like Anna. Hmm...that's a good idea. While that wouldn't help much (I think Elsa would just confuse modern doctors, lol), at least Elsa would have another opinion. The only thing is I don't think Elsa would want to let someone she doesn't know examine her leg. Someone (like Anna) would have to take her.:)**

 **Mandy-Well, this chapter is a little longer than they have been recently:) I'm glad you liked Elsa discovering new things she can do with her magic:) I just think Elsa still has a mischievous side, even if she doesn't let it show very often:) Wait and see regarding Anna's temporary water powers! It will show up again:) Consciously Elsa was just remembering what happened in the cave, but I would say yes, she probably subconsciously knows about that.:/ Argh, now that I'm really thinking about that, it just makes me want to give her a hug. That would feel awful, always being a bit worried no one wants you because your parents considered giving you away.:/ P.S. Well, thank you all the same:)**

 **moohamquest-Yep, that'll help Anna understand Elsa better:) And I'm glad you like Anikka:)**

 **On to the story:)**

When Elsa suddenly woke up hours later, it was completely dark and she didn't remember where she was at first. Then she noticed the warm something beside her and that the something was still holding her protectively, and she quickly relaxed. _I panicked and Anna made me feel better and then I must have…fallen asleep? Why did I wake up in the first place?_ Elsa sensed that something or someone was calling her, and she bolted upright.

Anna didn't wake up.

"It's Eliot's contact crystal," Elsa realized. _They must need help. I promised I'd come no matter what time it was._ Without really thinking through what she was doing, Elsa slipped out of Anna's room, went down the hall to her own room and changed her clothes; then headed downstairs via the ice elevator. _I need to hurry._

"Miss Elsa, where are you going?" Kai asked suddenly, making Elsa jump.

A bit of frost had appeared beneath Elsa's feet because she'd been startled, and she quickly dispelled it. "Niko and her little brother need help, and I need to go to their house," Elsa said simply. That was the truth. _Should I bring someone with me? Yes, I should…I don't want Papa to come, though…_

Kai hesitated, wondering whether it was appropriate for him to ask if Elsa needed or wanted a guard or escort to come with her. No way did he want Elsa leaving the castle grounds at night by herself, ice powers or no. "Would…would you like me to fetch a guard to go with you?" he asked. "I know you are fully capable of defending yourself, but it just isn't safe for a young woman such as yourself to go out alone this late. Especially since you aren't wearing one of your ice-dresses. Bad people who might leave the queen alone but not others won't recognize you immediately because it's dark."

"I'll go." Both Elsa and Kai turned to see who had said that, and both were very surprised when they saw it was Espen, who had been Jade's younger brother. "If you'll let me, Queen Elsa."

Elsa knew she had assigned Espen and Hans to unpaid servitude in the castle, but she hadn't seen either of them in awhile, leaving it to the guards to ensure they caused no more trouble. "Yes, I will let you do that, Espen," Elsa said instantly.

Kai frowned. "Miss Elsa, you trust this boy not to cause you any harm, let alone help protect you? Young man, if _anything_ happens to the queen, I'll personally-"

"Kai, stop it! Please!" Elsa interrupted. "Yes, I trust that Espen won't attempt to hurt me. He actually tried to help me when his own sister had me trapped in that cave. As for helping protect me, I'm sure he will do his best if need be," she said firmly. She turned to Espen and added, "When your sentence is over, you are welcome to stay on as a member of the paid staff. Hans is not, however, so I would prefer you didn't mention that to him, although I won't forbid it."

Kai suddenly stepped between Elsa and Espen and just said, "Miss Elsa, please just tell one of the guards at the gate to go with you. I would feel much better about it."

Elsa sighed, but decided to humor Kai, since she knew he was just trying to keep her safe. "Very well, I will."

* * *

The second Elsa was out of sight, Kai turned to Espen and just stared at him. "I don't know what you're thinking, but _leave her alone._ You had no right to ask Queen Elsa such a thing, and I saw how you were looking at her. Certainly not in any disgusting manner, but most definitely inappropriate. You are far too young for her in any event."

Espen's cheeks turned red. Since he had turned seventeen not long ago, he wasn't _quite_ that much younger than Elsa, right? And while he'd told Jade once that he did not either have a crush on Elsa; that had been true at the time, but it wasn't true anymore. He thought Elsa was very pretty and he actually liked her independent personality…she was different. And ok, he might kind of sort of think Elsa's hair was gorgeous. Besides, it looked perfect with her fair skin and barely there freckles across her cheeks.

"Now what are you thinking about, mister?" Kai demanded.

"Elsa's hair," Espen blurted without thinking. Then just as quickly, he realized what he had said and looked down at the floor as he added, "I'm sorry, sir, really I am-I didn't mean to be rude or-"

To Espen's surprise, the fatherly man just began chuckling. "A boy can dream, I suppose, but you just see to it that you keep your mouth shut and stay away from her," Kai said firmly.

"Yessir."

Kai's voice softened as he added, "Even if you were older and whatnot, I would still tell you to get away from her. Don't feel too insulted." _Besides, Elsa was just innocently talking to him before she left and I know she doesn't know this kid has some sort of crush on her. She might be smart about other things, but that isn't one of them._

"Yessir."

* * *

Now on her way to Nikoleta's house (finally), Elsa stayed a good three feet away from her guard, rather disliking being alone with someone she didn't know. Honestly she would have preferred taking Espen; at least she actually knew him. For the life of her, she couldn't remember her guard's name-was it Erik? she did remember he had clumsily run into her in the hall once last summer, but that was it-and she felt bad about it. And besides that, every second that passed, Niko and Eliot still needed help, and Elsa felt like she wasn't moving fast enough. She couldn't just fly using her air currents to their house in the dark, because she didn't know the way well enough and she wouldn't be able to see where she was going.

"Your majesty, we are approaching a more questionable area," the guard warned her. "Are you certain this is the right way?"

"Yes," Elsa replied shortly. She felt herself trip over a loose cobblestone and almost fall, but she managed to catch herself before actually doing so. _I need to come up with a way to be faster on foot and not feel…so slow. I could just make an ice path and slide on it…no, I shouldn't do that. That looks childish, and I still need to watch where I'm going so I don't get us lost._

A short while later, Elsa was about to knock on Niko's door when she felt something tug on her skirt, which made her jump. "Eliot, what are you doing out here?" she asked quietly. "Where is your sister?" Elsa gasped when she saw Nikoleta curled up on the small porch beside Eliot, and she awkwardly managed to sit down on the steps beside the two. _So…Eliot "called" me with his contact crystal because Niko was hurt? What happened…never mind, I'm quite sure I know what happened. Their dad hurt her somehow and either they got out of the house on their own or their parents kicked them out. Not sure which. It doesn't matter._ "Niko?" Elsa asked hesitantly.

The younger girl only made a barely audible pained noise, which Elsa did not like one bit. Elsa carefully made her icy glow 'lamp' in one hand, and gently laid her free hand on Nikoleta's forehead, hoping the coolness might wake the other girl up a little. Nikoleta blinked up at her and just whispered, "You came," before closing her eyes again.

"Niko…got…slammed…'gainst th'…wall," Eliot informed Elsa. "Won' let…us 'ack…in. So I…called…'ou."

Elsa instinctively shielded both of the others with her body when she heard the door whip open. She felt a sharp stinging sensation across her back an instant later and let out a pained yelp, but she mostly just felt happy she had kept Niko and Eliot from getting hit with whatever that was.

Elsa's guard (whose name was indeed Erik) quickly blocked the queen and the two siblings from any further harm, pulling his small gun as he did so. "Whoever you are, you are under arrest for assaulting the queen!" he shouted.

Elsa reassured Eliot that he and his big sister would be safe before standing back up using her air currents. "No, Mr. and Mrs. Dahler are under arrest for child abuse and neglect, _especially_ considering they had already been given a very clear warning!" she announced, her voice sounding much stronger and more sure of herself than she felt inside. She paused and went right up to the children's father, staring him right in the face, her blue eyes blazing. "You said you wouldn't treat your son and daughter like that anymore, sir. You opened that door and would have hit one of them with…something, I am not entirely sure what if I hadn't been in the way. What do you have to say about that?!"

"They wouldn't remove those…crystal things when I told them to. I…got angry. I'm sorry."

"There was a reason for that. This. So they could receive some much-deserved help." Elsa decided not to add that Nikoleta and Eliot _couldn't_ take off their contact crystal bracelets unless Elsa did it for them. She'd constructed them that way on purpose so the bracelets couldn't be stolen from the kids.

"Queen Elsa, I found a night policeman to take these two to jail. I didn't think you'd want to put them in the actual castle dungeon," the guard said a moment later. He had waved over a policeman who had been patrolling the street for assistance.

"They get thirty days jail time and then thirty days of community service," Elsa said flatly, holding Mr. Dahler's gaze, despite the fact that he was quite a bit taller than she was. "No bail, no appeal for lesser sentence." Then she addressed the man directly. "You will not be getting Nikoleta and Eliot back unless you prove you and your wife will take proper care of them. I think you might have some anger issues, and your wife has a drinking problem," she said matter-of-factly, not in a nasty tone, just…'that's how it is'.

The second the two unworthy parents had been taken away, Elsa realized just how tense she had been the whole time…and the fact that whatever Mr. Dahler had hit her with hurt quite a bit. _Can't deal with that now. I have to get both Niko and Eliot back to the castle safely and quickly._ Nikoleta still didn't seem completely awake, although she was more lucid than she had been when Elsa first arrived; and that worried Elsa. What if Niko had a concussion or worse? Elsa finally managed to swallow her pride about not remembering her guard's name and said, "Sir, I am very sorry, but I don't remember your name."

"Erik, Queen Elsa." He wasn't in the least offended; it wasn't Elsa's job to remember every single person's name in his mind. "Would you like me to carry the girl, and you can carry the little boy?" he offered.

Elsa hesitated, knowing she wouldn't be able to carry Eliot all the way back to the castle anyway, especially not with her back hurting. "No, I believe we will go back on an ice sled. We'll just have to go slowly so I don't get us all lost," she decided.

* * *

"Queen Elsa, Miss Dahler doesn't seem to have a concussion, just some bruises and a severe headache. But I think she's a little dehydrated and hasn't been eating since you let her and her brother leave before. It seems whatever little food their parents were giving them, she was giving it to Eliot," Dr. Raske told Elsa quietly after he had checked both Nikoleta and Eliot over. "Eliot appears perfectly fine, just shaken, which is understandable. I gave both of them some water and sent a servant to just get some simple bread and butter and jelly."

Elsa couldn't help but feel relieved, even though that still wasn't really what she had wanted to hear. "May I see them?" she asked hopefully.

"Of course. You didn't even need to ask."

Before Elsa had gone two feet past the doctor, he abruptly took her by the arm. "Queen Elsa, what happened to your back? Why didn't you say you needed yourself checked over, too?" Dr. Raske asked.

"I didn't think I needed to-I figured it was just a nasty welt of some kind," Elsa replied, puzzled by Dr. Raske's reaction. _It does hurt worse than regular bruises would, though…_ "How do you even know my back is hurt in the first place?"

"Because for one thing, you're standing a bit oddly, like your back hurts. Also you're bleeding. I don't know how you assumed 'it's just a bruise'. I can't even see all of it." Dr. Raske guided her to the infirmary bed next to Nikoleta's and made her sit down. "Either you let me tend to that or I fetch Gerda."

"I'll let you look at it, but only because I don't want to wake Gerda up." Elsa sighed, but quickly undid the back of her dress to her waist and just lay down on her tummy. She _hated_ feeling vulnerable, and she didn't like letting Dr. Raske touch her, even though she knew he wasn't going to hurt her. _At least I kept Niko and Eliot from getting hit with…whatever their dad ended up hitting me with. What on earth was he_ thinking _?! The odd thing is I honestly think he really doesn't consider what he's doing at all...he does have anger issues. He seemed genuinely regretful that his actions caused him to lose Niko and Eliot, although I don't know the reasoning why…_

Nikoleta gave Elsa a grateful smile from her bed a few feet away. "Thank you so much for coming, Queen Elsa," she said, half wanting to distract Elsa from her back being taken care of and half genuinely wanting to tell her thank you. _She looks a little…frightened. I bet she just doesn't like letting people she doesn't know really, really, really well touch her._ "Also…thank you for what you did. Blocking us from getting hurt and taking the hit yourself. You didn't have to do that."

Elsa gave the younger girl a lopsided smile back. "It was instinct…I wasn't really thinking. I should have shielded us with an ice bubble, but I think I was expecting to get yelled at for some reason, not hit," she answered truthfully. She flinched when a sharp pain ran across the mark on her back, but didn't otherwise react.

"Almost done, Queen Elsa. Sorry about that," Dr. Raske told her.

Elsa just nodded. "Will Niko and Eliot be able to sleep upstairs tonight?" she asked now.

"I would prefer Miss Dahler stayed here overnight so I can keep an eye on her if need be to make sure she's all right, but I think that would be fine tomorrow," the doctor told her. "Also you are all done. I just put antiseptic on it and bandaged it. Ask Gerda to change the bandages for you tomorrow. Try not to sleep on it, and don't wear anything constricting until it heals. Queen Elsa, it isn't really that serious, but what bothers me is that it wasn't an accident. Where is the person that did that to you?"

"Sentenced to jail and then community service after that," Elsa replied truthfully. "But I did that because of what they did to their own children, not for hurting me." She gingerly flexed her shoulders, hating how her back didn't just hurt now, it felt all stinging and itchy. Somehow stinging and itchy was worse to her than just plain thinking it hurt. _Okay, Elsa, just ignore it. It's not that bad and you know it._

"Are you hurt anywhere else?" the doctor asked as sternly as he dared. He knew Elsa would never voluntarily ask to be taken care of, so he wanted to be absolutely sure she was all right.

Elsa started to say no; then remembered her scrapes from earlier in the day. Those ached and stung a bit, but not a lot. "Just a couple scrapes from earlier in the afternoon. I fell outside, that's all," she admitted, not wanting to lie about it.

Dr. Raske knew Elsa well enough to know that she would tell the truth, even if she downplayed whatever was wrong. "Just little scrapes or did you skin your knee or something similar?"

"I…don't know? In between, I suppose?" Elsa held out the hand with the scrape on her palm, honestly unsure which category it went in. "My knee is a little bit worse-looking than that," she said reluctantly. Elsa smiled in relief and nodded when Dr. Raske just said to make sure she didn't pick at it and that was it.

"If your knee is worse, it probably should be bandaged just to make sure it stays clean. Queen Elsa, why do you insist on not getting yourself taken care of?" the doctor asked, shaking his head when Elsa just made a face. "Well, since it's just a skinned knee, I'll let you take care of it yourself. Is that more to your liking?"

Elsa nodded gratefully. Mostly she just didn't want anyone poking and prodding her anymore. After taking care of that, she went over to Nikoleta and hesitantly gave her hand a comforting squeeze. "Do…d'you want me to stay 'til you and Eliot fall asleep?" _Why did I say that? Maybe they don't even want me here at all._

Nikoleta just looked confused at the older girl's offer. "Why would you do that, Queen Elsa? You don't owe us anything…you already did a bunch more than you had to…" She started to sit up; then groaned and pressed her hand to her head. "Good grief that hurts," she muttered. _That headache better not be quite so bad by tomorrow…I gotta go to work…_ "Anyways…my point is you probably should be resting yourself…know it's not my place…sorry…"

Elsa just shrugged slightly and pulled a chair up next to Nikoleta's bedside. "I don't mind staying. I'll leave if you actually want me to, though," she replied. "Okay?"

* * *

The next morning, Elsa woke up and realized she had just fallen asleep right in her chair the night before. _It's early. I can go upstairs and get dressed and whatnot before Anna or anyone else start worrying._ She quickly went straight up to her room after making sure that both Nikoleta and Eliot were indeed still perfectly fine.

Elsa was looking in her closet for something to wear when she heard her door fly open with no warning, and she let out a quiet embarrassed yelp when she saw it was Anna. Instantly an opaque ice wall went up between her and Anna.

"Good grief, Elsa, it's just me," Anna said, a bit offended. "Are you ok? What's going on?"

"I'm not _dressed_!" Elsa exclaimed indignantly from behind her ice wall. _And I don't want you seeing that I hurt my back, either._ "Just…wait a minute, please." She hadn't wanted to try making a new ice-dress; she didn't have any specific design ideas and when she didn't have a specific design idea, her magic would more likely than not make something she didn't particularly want to wear in front of everyone all day. Elsa sighed and just grabbed the one style outfit she had that wouldn't be constricting on her back and quickly put it on before dissolving the ice wall.

Anna just frowned at her. "Elsa, something is up. Why are you wearing that? I haven't seen you wear that kind of outfit since…since before. And you're acting funny, too," she said, sounding both worried and confused.

Elsa looked down at herself and just sighed. She was wearing a white blouse, a dark blue-purple long skirt with detailing along the hem, and a short jacket the same color as the skirt. "I…this is what I want to wear today," she said finally. "Maybe…maybe I'm tired of my other couple dresses."

"Liar."

Elsa _really_ didn't want to tell Anna why she wasn't wearing her original ice-dress and explain that her back was hurt. Anna would start worrying about her or something. "This outfit hides my brace better," she countered. That _was_ true, but Elsa didn't really think that was a good enough reason, either. But it was somehow…nice…to know that no one could see what was 'wrong' with her.

Anna said nothing for a moment. She knew Elsa wasn't telling her everything, but she decided not to press the issue further. _Elsa shouldn't feel like she should hide that she has to wear a brace, even if that's not really the main reason. I know when Elsa's lying, and that time she wasn't. She's just not explaining everything._ "Well, why don't you do something extra special with your hair and put those sparkly ice clips you make in it?" she suggested, reaching with her good hand to give Elsa's hand a reassuring squeeze. "That way you won't feel like old Elsa from before the Great Thaw."

"Would you like me to do your hair too?" Elsa offered, knowing from personal experience it was rather difficult if not impossible to braid hair using only one hand. Granted, Anna could still _sort of_ use her hand since she'd only sprained her wrist, not broken it, but still. _It's mostly my fault Anna got hurt anyways…_

Anna grinned. "Absolutely! Can you do it in my regular pigtail braids, but with the fishtail kind? D'you know how to do that? 'Cause I don't."

Elsa laughed at that. "Sure. That isn't hard. It just takes a little longer than regular braids do. I can teach you how to do it once your wrist is better if you like," she replied.

Anna felt so happy to hear her sister's quiet giggles after the way Elsa had gotten so severely upset the day before she nearly began crying herself. _Elsa is ok. And she seems genuinely happy now, even if she's acting kinda strange for whatever reason. I can_ feel _that she feels happy right now through her magic._ "Elsa…I just wanted you to know I'm _really_ sorry for saying those mean things yesterday. I know I didn't outright apologize yesterday when I tried to help you calm down and feel better, and I should have. And…and I…I know sort of what those horrible panic attacks make you feel like inside now 'cause of the interesting magic connection thing, and just…it kinda makes me feel sick. Like, not the sick-that-makes-you-barf way, the sick that just makes you understand just what somebody else goes through." She paused before adding, "Ok, that prob'ly didn't make much sense. Anyways."

"I'm all right, Anna. I'm used to it," Elsa said softly. "My magic reacting to the way I feel is just…well, _me_. I've always been like that. I don't know anything different. I'm sure it probably feels a lot worse to you since you aren't used to having magic flowing through you in the first place." _I wonder if Anna understands now why I wished I was 'normal'…_ "Anna, I…I'm sorry I made you feel like that. I didn't mean to."

"Don't apologize for that, you stinker. I think it made me understand you and the way you think a little better." Anna impulsively hugged her sister tightly, oblivious to the quiet pained noise Elsa made at the unexpected pressure on her back. "I'm glad you're my sister. I wish I was able to deal with things like you."

"You _what_?!" Elsa sounded simultaneously incredulous and horrified. "No! No, no, no. My little sister is _not_ going to deal with things like I do. I won't have it! Anna, please don't-"

"Elsa, stop it," Anna interrupted. "I know you don't think so and don't feel like it, but you're actually _strong_ inside. Not broken or weak. You're strong enough that dealing with really really bad things that would make anybody go crazy doesn't make you not…you. And I don't think you wanna hear this, but I'm starting to think those awful episodes you have sometimes aren't just from being traumatized-I think there's something a bit wrong in your head, 'cause it's been a while and it's still happening. And that hasn't made you not 'just plain Elsa' either."

Elsa just looked at her little sister quizzically. "You…you think there's s-something wrong with me…m-mentally?" she asked in a very small voice. She looked down at her hands and just clasped them close against her chest as she backed away and began trying to blink back tears. "Why…are you…s-still here…then?" _Oh, come on, Elsa, you know Anna's probably right. Get it together and just stop it._

Anna was about to take back what she'd said, but then thought better of it, knowing Elsa immediately recognize she was sort of lying. She immediately dropped to her knees beside Elsa when Elsa somehow tripped and fell. "I'm still here, Elsa, because I care about you and I _don't care_ that there might be something 'wrong'. I mean, I _care,_ 'cause I want you to be ok, but I love you no matter what." Anna felt a bit encouraged when Elsa seemed to relax as she hid her face in Anna's shoulder. Elsa was still crying and was clearly upset, but Anna could also tell she was not on the verge of panicking. She was just crying and wanted someone to comfort her. Even Elsa's magic only seemed what could only be described as sad and a bit squashed, not agitated and scared.

Elsa didn't entirely understand what Anna had meant, but somehow Anna outright telling her 'I think there's something wrong with you' had actually made her feel a little better once she had actually thought about it instead of the other way around. If there was something wrong with her, then that would explain why she felt like she couldn't get rid of those nasty episodes and similar things entirely. Maybe being badly stressed out made it extra difficult for her to ignore or resist things or thoughts that would trigger her. That would explain why she would feel better for awhile and then something else bad would happen and she felt like she was regressing. Maybe being traumatized was what set off whatever was wrong in the first place, but she had always had something wrong with her inside. That made sense. It didn't exactly make her feel good about herself, but it was definitely a relief somehow. "Thank you…Anna," she mumbled into her sister's shoulder. _I have no idea if Anna is right or not, but it makes sense. And having an explanation that's at least reasonable, even if it's not correct, might at least help._ "But don't tell anyone. Not even Mama or Gerda. Please. They'll think I'm…crazy or something worse."

"I won't. I promise. But you know Gerda and Mama wouldn't think that. Mom would just fuss over you and bother you, and Gerda would probably just treat you normal, same as always, even if she was worried about you." Anna thought for a moment before adding, "Actually, Elsa, I'll bet Gerda already had that idea and hasn't said anything because she knows we wouldn't have any medicine for that sort of thing and we don't know how it works, and therefore didn't want to worry you or anyone else."

Elsa gave Anna a small smile at that. "That's true…I don't know if you're right or not, but it's at least a logical explanation. Let's just talk about something else. D'you want me to braid your hair now?"

* * *

"Elsa, you look quite nice this morning," Idun told Elsa when she saw Elsa in the hallway on the way to get breakfast. "I like how you took something I know you don't particularly like wearing and put your own flair on it by fixing your hair differently."

Elsa's cheeks turned pink at the compliment. All she had done was two small braids on each side and then linked them into one larger braid down her back, leaving the rest loose. And she had sprinkled several tiny sparkling icy snowflakes along the braids. "It…didn't really take very long. Thank you, Mama," she said quietly. Now that she actually thought about it, she honestly _liked_ her current 'look'. Maybe she would go through her closet and take out the things she honestly disliked (scratchy heavy fabric, super high collars), but actually start wearing some of her other regular clothes. Elsa did love her ice-dresses, but for times when she didn't want to stick out so much, they definitely weren't ideal. "I don't stand out so much in this outfit," she added.

Anna just giggled. "Yes, you do. Your hair is gonna make boys swoon and stare at you. There's so much of it and it looks so pretty!"

"It will not. It's not pretty; it just stands out because it looks weird," Elsa replied. She did think her hair _style_ was pretty, but not her hair itself.

"Suit yourself." Anna just shrugged, not understanding why Elsa always insisted that her hair looked weird. "Come on, let's go get breakfast."

 **A/N: Next chapter coming soon:)**


	13. Chapter 13

**A/N: Thanks to everyone who's followed/favorited and/or is reading but not reviewing:)**

 **Olivia O'Neil-Thank you:) Well, not only is Elsa _not_ going to fall in love, I still think Espen is too young for her anyway. I just figured being a teenage boy not THAT much younger than she is, Espen probably would think like that.:P Elsa's trying to get better, so she should seem at least a bit more cheerful from now on, even if she still cries sometimes.:)**

 **Elsa Tomago-The reason for Elsa's reaction will be explained in this chapter.:) The abusers also pretty much permanently lost their kids. In Elsa's mind, that was a far worse punishment than putting them in jail.:P Thank you:)**

 **orang biasa-Yep, Elsa finally actually used her authority:) Helping Niko and Eliot is just the beginning of Elsa's long-term plan, although yes, that IS one of the main things in this story.:) I'm glad you like "my" Elsa...sometimes I'm worried she gets upset too much, but I really can't see her much different at this point in time. She's only twenty-one and she's been through a lot and she was pretty sensitive and introverted to begin with.:P Now hopefully my computer translated that properly...did it mean something like "thank you for your time"? If so, you are very welcome:)**

 **raven678-The reason why Elsa didn't punish Mr. Dahler for hurting her is explained in this chapter. She actually had two reasons for reacting like she did...one logical and one not so logical.:/ You're right, she _does_ need to speak up for herself. She did speak up for Nikoleta and Eliot, though.:)**

 **On to the story!**

THAT AFTERNOON…

"Nikoleta Dahler, you cannot go to work today!" Elsa repeated. "I don't want to order you not to, but you just said you still had a headache and it just wasn't as bad as last night. Besides…" she tried to think of another reason why Niko shouldn't go, "besides, I'll bet your boss or manager or whoever won't want you there anyway with those bruises on your face."

Nikoleta figuratively froze. She hadn't thought of that, but she knew Elsa was right. People looked at her while she served the food. That was part of the job. "I could cover up the bruises with makeup," she countered.

"You don't have any with you, and I forbid anyone in this castle to lend you any. Niko, your eye is still a little swollen anyway, and you can't really cover that up," Elsa told her in a gentler tone. "Please, just go upstairs and rest. Anna and I will watch Eliot for you."

"I'll…I'll lose my job if I don't show up," Nikoleta said in a small voice.

"Tell me where you work and I will personally go there and say you are not coming to work because you're injured. It didn't sound like a very pleasant job in the first place. If you are worried about a place to stay, you are welcome to stay here as long as you like. Does Eliot need to be taken to school every day?" Elsa asked.

Nikoleta just stared at Elsa in surprise. "Eliot can't go to school, Queen Elsa," she said quietly. "He tried. It didn't work. Other kids were really mean and I don't think the teacher knew how to help him. I taught him how to read and a bit of math, though…I don't read that well myself, though. And…I don't think a high-standing person such as yourself should go to where I work."

Elsa's expression grew determined. "All right, then Eliot will just receive lessons along with Anikka unless we figure out something better. Niko, if you don't wish me to go to wherever it is you work, I can send someone instead. Would you like that better? Also, I have another proposition." She paused before continuing, "You could live here at the castle and assist me with my plans to fix a few things in Arendelle instead of going back to your old job. There are plenty of guest rooms upstairs, and I would make sure you had privacy."

"Queen Elsa, there is no way whatever you decide to have me help with would make enough money to pay for Eliot and me to stay here. I don't want to be a charity case," Nikoleta replied. _Why is she offering that anyway? She has plenty of people that would help her with whatever she wants help with._

Elsa just smiled. "If you decide to work here, we'll have a contract. You'll make more money if you stay at your house, but I didn't think you'd want to walk all the way over here every day, and I know Eliot would have a really hard time doing that. So, we would just put into the contract that room and board is included. We can discuss exact details if you like," she suggested.

"So…if I work here, I don't make any actual money, but Eliot and I would have a place to stay and food?" Nikoleta asked, trying to clarify. _That sounds good, actually…_

"No! No, no, no," Elsa replied hurriedly. "You'd still get paid, just less than if you weren't staying here. Niko, castle jobs do make at least fairly good income. I'm not offering you special treatment, aside from a room upstairs instead of downstairs, and that's only because I thought Eliot would want access to easily play with Anikka without bothering with the stairs. That ice-elevator still doesn't function unless I'm running it, and I haven't figured out how to fix that yet. Does that sound good?"

Nikoleta smiled, nodded, and dropped a curtsy. "At your service, milady. What would you like me to do first?"

"The first thing I would like you to do is to not curtsy to me," Elsa said quietly. "The second thing is that you are going to go rest while I write up a contract. When I'm finished, I'll come find you and you can tell me if the terms are to your liking. Does that sound all right with you?"

Nikoleta nodded again and gave Elsa a shy smile. "Thank you very much for being so nice," she replied. She'd already considered Elsa to be a good ruler, but there was something else about her. Elsa hadn't just offered her a job; she was outright ordering her new employee to rest before doing anything at all. _She actually really, genuinely cares about her country's citizens, even Eliot and me. I know she probably just thinks she's doing her job, but she's really doing more than that._

Elsa just looked puzzled. "I'm doing what I am supposed to be doing. Making sure you and Eliot are safe and taken care of," she said matter-of-factly. "Now go back and rest. I will make sure Eliot is watched in the meantime." Elsa paused for a moment before adding, "Niko, you said you couldn't read that well…I can try to help you if you want me to. Only if you want me to, though."

Nikoleta just stared at Elsa in surprise. "Why would you offer that? I'd just be taking up your time, and-"

"And everyone should be able to read easily," Elsa interrupted. "Besides, I…I want to do things that will _help_ people, n-not…not hurt them. And I-I…I…" She blinked several times, trying to keep her tears from falling, but couldn't. _Elsa,_ stop it. _What is wrong with you? You can't cry in front of Nikoleta. It makes you look stupid._ "I'm sorry. I have to go."

Nikoleta hesitated for a few seconds before running after Elsa and catching her by the arm. _If she decides I'm being rude or something, that's my problem, not hers. She deserves help, too._ "Queen Elsa, I…I know it's not my place and I'll understand if you change your mind about helping Eliot and me anymore, but…" Nikoleta bit her lip and just gave the older girl a hug.

Elsa flinched and yelped in surprise, but she didn't pull away. "I'm sorry for acting…ridiculous," she said quietly.

"I don't think you were 'acting ridiculous', Queen Elsa. I think you were remembering something painful and it made you upset. That _is_ a legitimate reaction in my opinion." Nikoleta tried to give Elsa reassuring smile, but she felt so nervous she was nearly shaking. She wasn't worried Elsa would hurt her in any way, but she knew if she'd treated any other person in Elsa's position except Elsa the way she just had, she would be in a lot of trouble. _I just went up to the queen and gave her a hug without asking. What was I thinking?! Well, I can't make it any worse…_ "Queen Elsa, I've heard about you accidentally freezing Princess Anna, even though I didn't see what happened in person. And I know enough about you that not only was it an accident, it wasn't even your fault anyways. I…I think you've been through a lot of abuse yourself, just a different kind."

"Stop calling me 'Queen Elsa'."

"I…I'm not sure I understand," Nikoleta replied, puzzled.

"I said stop calling me 'Queen Elsa'. Just 'Elsa' will be fine," Elsa repeated. She was no longer crying, but her blue eyes were still bright with tears all the same. "What…what you said means a lot…you didn't need to try to make me feel better. Thank you."

After Elsa had written up the contract and both she and Nikoleta had signed it, Elsa instructed Nikoleta to continue resting until tomorrow. "You can start helping me with my project tomorrow," she'd said firmly. "I am going to go see exactly what Eliot knows as far as schooling goes."

* * *

A few minutes later, Elsa sat on the sofa in the library with both Eliot and Anikka, one child on each side. "You two are going to take turns reading pages out of Anna's fairy tale book out loud. If there are words you don't know, try to sound them out, and if that doesn't work, I'll help you," Elsa told them. She hadn't known how to begin teaching children; she had no experience in such a thing and she honestly wasn't sure exactly what either child knew. So Elsa had decided starting with something fun like reading a fairy tale would be the best way to start. _I don't know what I'm doing…I hope I can help them…_

"I dunno how t' read," Anikka said.

"I'm…not…'ood…at…'alking," Eliot said.

Both children looked nervous as they looked up at Elsa expectantly. Elsa bit her lip, unsure what she should do or say. "Um…okay. Let's just…Anikka, I know you know your letters. Will you practice writing them out for me? You can use the coffee table as a desk. I brought some pencils and paper in here already." When Anikka seemed only too happy to oblige, Elsa sighed in relief and turned her attention to Eliot. "Eliot, I know you don't want to read aloud, but Niko told me you know how to read. I thought practicing reading aloud might help you speak better _and_ improve your reading skills. I promise I'm not going to judge you or pick on you for having trouble."

"It…won'…help," Eliot replied. "Jus'…stu-pid."

"Yes, it will. I don't know how much it will help, but it _will_ help," Elsa said firmly. _I know Eliot's problem talking is caused by a completely different thing than my stuttering last summer, but Gerda made me practice talking and that helped. So it ought to help Eliot too, even if it doesn't completely fix his speech since it's not caused by the same thing._ "Eliot, I don't know what garbage your parents told you or what kids or the teacher at school said, but all of them are wrong. You are not stupid. Having trouble talking doesn't mean you're dumb or unable to understand things. So please don't call yourself stupid."

Eliot just stared at Elsa, unsure what to think. "How…d'you…know…it…'ill…help?"

"Because I used to have a stutter, and Gerda made me practice saying things to help it get better," Elsa said quietly. "I _still_ stutter once in a while if I'm scared or upset. I know it's not exactly the same speech issue as yours, but still."

"Did…'eople…think…'ou were…stu-pid?" Eliot's eyes filled with tears, and he swiped them away a second later.

Elsa gently gave the little boy a reassuring hug. "I'm sure some people thought I was stupid, but no one important did. And it's all right to cry. Holding in tears is bad for you and just makes it worse." _I wish I knew better what to do. I_ feel _stupid because I'm scared I'll do or say the wrong thing._ "Eliot, stay here. I'll be right back, all right?"

Less than five minutes later, Elsa returned with Gerda. Both children were right where Elsa had left them, although Anikka had now finished her letters and was now contentedly drawing on her paper. Elsa struggled not to laugh when she saw what Anikka had done; she'd done the same thing when she was little. "Anikka, next time don't draw on your paper. Run along and go find Anna. You can do your math later," Elsa told her. Elsa's expression grew confused when she heard Eliot's question. "Eliot, what did you just say?"

"I…said…how'd…'ou…learn…t' walk…so…good?"

Elsa looked to Gerda for help, not knowing what to say. _Why would Eliot say such a thing? I'm just…wait a minute. Of course Eliot said that. I have one bad leg, not two, and I don't need crutches to keep my balance. Now I feel downright…stupid for feeling like I do. I don't have any right to feel bad or self-conscious because of my leg._

"Miss Elsa has to wear her brace because of a permanent injury. She wasn't born needing it like you were born needing yours," Gerda told Eliot as she sat down next to him. "So her legs work differently than yours. Does that make sense?"

Eliot nodded, glancing from Elsa's legs to his own and back again. "That's…not…fair. That…'ean…El-sa…could…r…run…'fore…she…'ot…hurt…an'…can't…'ny-more. 'Least…I…n'ver…knew…'ny-thin'…diff-rent."

Elsa's big blue eyes filled with tears at that, and she instinctively hugged Eliot tightly. Why would a little kid she didn't even know that well care about her enough to say such a thing? She could feel herself shaking with sobs, although she knew she didn't feel like she was about to panic. _Elsa, stop it. You'll make Eliot uncomfortable._

Gerda just pulled both Elsa and Eliot into her arms and held them close. As far as she was concerned, she was simply holding two young people who were hurting inside, and she was determined to help both of them. _Maybe helping Eliot will make Elsa feel better about herself and vice versa. I can already tell Eliot is idealizing Elsa and wanting to be like her anyways…_ "Eliot, having bad legs doesn't have anything to do with what is or isn't 'fair'. It's just a fact. You and Miss Elsa are stuck that way, and you are both just going to have to accept it and that's that. It doesn't define either of you," Gerda said quietly. "And you, Miss Elsa…now you can see you aren't the only one. So you can stop letting people make you feel bad or self-conscious about it." She knew Elsa would eventually be able to at least partially heal her leg, but she was also adamantly determined that Elsa be comfortable in her own skin just like she was. Magic or not, Gerda was absolutely sure that Elsa was never going to walk a hundred percent 'normally' on her own again no matter how much she tried, but Gerda had no intentions of telling Elsa that unless she specifically asked.

Elsa scooted away from Gerda, tentatively keeping one arm around the child beside her since she wasn't sure whether Eliot wanted her to do that. Maybe he didn't like hugs since he was a little boy, she had no idea. (Although she needn't have worried; while Eliot did indeed dislike his big sister hugging him or something similar in public, he did like hugs otherwise.) "Gerda, please tell Eliot about how you helped me last summer. With getting ready for that speech and everything," she requested.

"Of course, Miss Elsa. Eliot, she told you the truth. Miss Elsa had trouble with stuttering before, and practicing speaking, among other things, did help her. She's not going to punish you or treat you badly for not being able to talk clearly." Gerda looked to Elsa and added, "Perhaps you could help Eliot come up with other ways of communicating, though, Miss Elsa. Stuttering isn't the same issue as what Eliot has at all…his speech problems are connected with whatever congenital condition he has, and I'm not sure how much you can help him."

"C…Cere-bral…'alsy," Eliot said helpfully. "Niko…found…out."

Gerda nodded. "That sounds about right. Miss Elsa, Eliot, you two should come up with some other communication system. Experiment with your magic or something, Miss Elsa…you made those contact crystal things. I'm sure there's something you could make that would help. Eliot, I'm completely willing to try to help you speak better on your own, but I think you need to know it's not going to so-called 'fix' it."

Eliot nodded but didn't say anything.

"Miss Elsa, teach Eliot math or new vocabulary words on paper or something. You're going to have to be creative and come up with other ways to explain and practice things besides verbal recitations," Gerda told her. "Write things down; have Eliot spell words by pointing to letters on paper; things like that."

Elsa nodded and gave Eliot a lopsided smile. "You're going to be just fine, Eliot. I'm probably a horrible teacher, but Gerda isn't, and she said she would help."

* * *

Later that evening, Elsa just sat quietly as Gerda replaced the bandages on her back. "Gerda, don't tell anyone, especially Anna, about me being hurt, please," she said now.

"I won't, Miss Elsa, but why are you so adamant that she not know about it? You did a good thing-you rescued those two new friends of yours." Gerda frowned, wondering whether she should tell Elsa the rest of what she thought Elsa needed to hear. "Will you object to me telling you something that isn't my place nor business, Miss Elsa?" Gerda asked finally. "Also, on another note, you're all bandaged up again, so you can redo those buttons yourself if you like." Gerda knew quite well how Elsa did _not_ like being fussed over and could easily do buttons up her back herself, so she left that for Elsa to do.

Elsa shook her head as she started on the buttons on the back of her nightgown. "I wouldn't object to _anything_ you might have to tell me," she said firmly. "Ever."

Gerda waited until Elsa was finished with her buttons and then just took her hands and looked her right in the eyes. "You didn't punish those abusers for hurting you, did you, Miss Elsa?" she asked matter-of-factly.

"Well…no…that wasn't their crime; they were _hurting_ their children!" Elsa said slowly. "I didn't want them to just think I was punishing them just because I have the authority to do so, like a…a…I don't know…like I was going on a power trip or something." _Besides, Nikoleta and Eliot are more important than me…I just wanted to protect them. Their dad was aiming for them, not me. I just…got in the way._ "I was trying to keep Niko and Eliot safe, that's all. Mr. Dahler aimed at them and I was just…in the way."

"What do you call that nasty mark on your back, Miss Elsa? That you were just 'in the way'? I don't care what the circumstances were, that you were protecting your country's citizens or whatever else. The point is the mark ended up on _you_ , not the abusers' children. This wasn't a one time occurrence, either. The first time you went to that house you came home with a black eye." Gerda paused, trying to figure out how to explain what she meant.

Elsa stayed quiet, unsure what to say.

"Let's put it this way. Would you have considered it a 'power trip' if, say, your sister had gone with you and _she_ ended up hurt because she was 'just being in the way' and you punished Mr. Dahler for hurting the princess?" Gerda asked.

"Of course not! I'd punish him because not only was he trying to hurt his children, he hurt my baby sister! That's not going on a power trip at all. At the very, very _least_ , I'd make him think I was going to do something awful and not actually do anything," Elsa replied with great certainty. "It would have been Mr. Dahler's fault anyways because he shouldn't have been acting like that in the first place."

Gerda held Elsa's gaze. "If that's the case, then why didn't you do the same for yourself?" she asked.

Elsa dropped her eyes to her lap and didn't say anything…at least she _thought_ she didn't say anything. _Because it's not the same thing._

Gerda knew Elsa hadn't realized she had spoken aloud, so she gently put one hand under the girl's chin and lifted her head. "Why isn't it the same thing, Miss Elsa?" she asked quietly.

Elsa visibly flinched at that question, and she just closed her eyes, not wanting Gerda to see her tears, even though she knew Gerda wouldn't care. _I don't know._ "I'm not…not like Anna," she said finally.

"So? So what?" Gerda asked sharply. "You aren't _supposed_ to be 'like Anna'. You're supposed to be like Elsa. No one else. You know that. What does not being 'like Anna' have to do with anything?"

"I…I don't know. I-I…I guess I just…figured since it was just me, it wasn't any big deal and it…it wouldn't be right to punish someone for…hurting me." Elsa's whole countenance seemed to crumple as she added, " _My_ parents hurt m-me…why would Niko's b-be any d…d-different? I didn't really _think_ that right…when…it happened, but…I think…I think…that's why." _Why did I say that? It doesn't even make any sense._

"Elsa. Miss Elsa. Listen to me." Gerda hugged Elsa close, being careful of her bandaged back. "Miss Elsa, I don't know why you're still feeling like this or how to fix it, but you _do_ have value, _just like you are._ It has nothing to do with what position of authority you hold or anything like that. It has to do with having value as just a person. You need to defend yourself when the situation calls for it."

"But I'm…broken…we throw away broken things. I know Anna doesn't want to throw me away, but…but I think Mama and Papa would have if they thought they wouldn't get in political trouble because of it." Elsa grabbed her birthday dolls from Anna the summer before and just clutched them tightly. She didn't understand why she felt like this all of a sudden, but right now she was _very_ sure her daddy hadn't wanted her _at all_ when she was little.

Gerda thought for a moment before gently taking the Elsa doll from Elsa's arms. "Miss Elsa, look at your doll self. She doesn't look new anymore, does she?"

Elsa shook her head and gave Gerda a confused look, still clutching the Anna doll tightly. "I've been careful with them, but they've still gotten a little messed up. Probably from all the times they've been hugged to death if I'm scared at night by myself or panicking or something."

"Are you going to toss your dolls out because they're messed up?"

"Of course not. They're just a bit…well-loved." Elsa gave Gerda a lopsided smile. "I'd just ask you to please wash them or sew up a rip in their clothes or fix whatever else was wrong with them."

"Do you think your dolls are 'broken'?"

"No. They're plushy rag cloth dolls. They can't break," Elsa replied, still not entirely sure where Gerda was going with this line of questioning. "I wouldn't throw them out even if they _were_ broken somehow. Anna gave them to me and you made them. That would _not_ be okay, and they're still fine like they are anyways."

"Miss Elsa, why do you think it's all right to 'throw away' a real live human girl and it's not all right to toss out inanimate objects you care about?" Gerda asked. "That makes no sense whatsoever, and you know it. Just because people who should have loved and taken care of you when you were little didn't do so doesn't make you any less valuable."

Elsa's big blue eyes filled with tears again, but she seemed a bit more at ease now all the same. "So Papa _didn't_ want me," she said softly, looking down at her hands. _Why am I upset about that? I knew that. I know I knew that._

Gerda gently took Elsa's pale hands and just held them tightly. "For what it's worth, I know your father was thinking about giving you away and changed his mind on his own…at that point, that decision was for personal reasons, not political ones," she said truthfully.

* * *

Elsa jumped when she heard her door fly open suddenly. There stood Anna, her hands on her hips and a clear scowl on her face. "Gerda, I swear I wasn't trying to eavesdrop, I just wanted to see if Elsa had any more letters for me, but I heard what you just told Elsa, and…and…and… _that's not fair_! I'm gonna…I'm gonna, I don't know, snap Dad's head off! Or stuff _him_ in the dungeon and see how he likes it!" Anna ran over to Elsa and just squeezed her tightly, which made her yelp. _That wasn't one of Elsa's surprised yelps. She sounded like she was hurt._ "Elsa, where are you hurt, and who did it?" Anna demanded. "Wait a minute, is that why you wore that blouse and skirt today? 'Cause you were hurt somehow?"

"I'm fine," was all Elsa said.

Anna ignored that and turned her attention to Gerda. "Gerda, what's wrong with my sister? I _know_ she had to have told you, because you usually take care of her when she's hurt."

Gerda gave Elsa's hand a reassuring squeeze. "I promised Miss Elsa I wouldn't tell anyone about it. But I'm sure she could be convinced if you promise not to fuss over her and worry," she repied, knowing those were the reasons Elsa hadn't wanted anyone else to know.

"I promise, 'cause it can't be _too_ bad or Elsa would've accidentally let me know about it because she wouldn't be acting normally." Anna looked straight at Elsa, willing her to know she was telling the truth.

"I…I just hurt my back when I went to Niko's house last night and Gerda had to change the bandages a few minutes ago. I don't know how bad it is because I can't see it," Elsa explained truthfully.

Anna frowned as she plopped down next to Elsa and carefully gave her a hug. _That means I prob'ly hurt her earlier today when I hugged her like I did._ "I don't want you going over there again, Elsa. You've gotten hurt twice now because of it," she said firmly. "Gerda, is Elsa gonna be all right? Like she's going to heal without it scarring or anything, right?"

"It looked like she'd been hit with something a bit sharp, to be honest. Whatever it was was enough to make it bleed originally, but it's not particularly horrible. I don't think it will scar, but even if it does, it'll be faint and not noticeable. Miss Elsa will be perfectly fine," Gerda told Anna firmly. "And I believe Elsa does indeed have a couple letters for you."

Elsa went and took the letters for Anna off her desk. "Here they are. I like replying to letters from different people, but I keep worrying I'll say the wrong thing."

 **A/N: Next chapter coming soon!:)**


	14. Chapter 14

**A/N: Thanks to everyone who's followed/favorited and/or is reading but not reviewing:)**

 **Olivia O'Neil-Thank you:) I agree, and something similar is actually going to happen eventually. (Hint: A trip will be taken in the near future by none other than Elsa herself.:P) Yep, that's exactly what Anna's letters are!:) And yes, Elsa's ice amusement park is still intact. I wasn't planning on having them all have a fun day there, but I think that can easily be arranged.:)**

 **Elsa Tomago-I just figured there's no way Elsa WOULDN'T offer that. Well, something will happen in either the next chapter or the one after that (not sure yet) that's upsetting on first glance but will actually let Elsa realize something she didn't know before because it's something that's honestly never happened before. (As a kind of sort of hint...just remember that Elsa's magic is more 'settled' and agreeable inside her than it was before. So it's more likely to do something she wants it to do, even if she's not 100% perfect at making it do so all the time. Like how she can use her emotions and thoughts to directly control her powers without doing anything at all.)**

 **HanLeiaSolo-I don't think you're 'sorry you haven't left a review in so long, sis'.:P Moving on...glad you like Nikoleta and Eliot as characters.:) Well, that isn't going to happen forever. Just give Elsa a chance. She still has responsibilities to deal with, but there isn't anything ridiculously crazy going on right now, so she has a chance to actually heal inside properly without being so stressed. Until she's completely okay, Gerda will probably continue talking to her like that.:)**

 **RandomWriter-Thank you:) I just thought it would nice to connect the two:)**

 **orang biasa-Agreed, Elsa cannot continue reacting like that. She'll end up with bad rumors going around and they'll get to people who may want to harm her or take advantage of her country. Thank you:) That's exactly what language I thought it was, but I wasn't completely sure and I didn't want to guess wrong.:P I'm sorry for being stupid.:P Don't apologize for that-I LIKE seeing other languages in my reviews, to be honest, because it's cool to think there are readers in other countries reading my stories.:P**

 **On to the story:)**

"Elsa, don't you dare put up with any more nonsense like you always do," Agdar repeated the next morning. He and Idun, along with Kiara, were just about to leave Arendelle to set off for their respective destinations-he and Idun to Weselton since Elsa had ceded it to them, and Kiara home to the Southern Isles.

 _What kind of nonsense, Papa?_ Elsa wasn't entirely sure how to react, so she just replied, "Yes, Papa."

"She wouldn't 'put up with nonsense' _ever_ if it wasn't for you abusing her all her life," Anna muttered under her breath. She yelped and shot Elsa a scowl when she felt Elsa poke her sharply in the ribs. Elsa's expression clearly said Anna had better Be Agreeable Or Else, but Anna didn't particularly care. She was still mad from what she'd heard Gerda tell Elsa the evening before, and she knew Gerda would never lie to Elsa, so it had to be the truth.

Luckily the girls' parents didn't seem to have heard Anna's outburst. Idun gave both of her daughters a hug and then looked them both in the eyes. "I'm proud of both of you," she said quietly. "Elsa, despite everything, you've grown into a fine young lady who's carrying herself perfectly on the throne, even if she still feels sad and hurt sometimes. And you, Anna…you've matured so much, just over the few months your father and I have been here." Idun turned to Elsa and gently nudged her towards her father. "I'd like to talk to Anna by herself for a minute, and I believe your father has something to tell you."

Elsa gave her mother a quizzical look but did as she was asked. The second Elsa was gone, Idun turned her attention back to Anna. "I just wanted to tell you thank you for what you've done and still do for Elsa. Anna, you've helped her so much; you've taken care of her even when she's…all upset like she gets sometimes. You showed your own parents what they should have done all along. Please just…keep doing what you're doing."

Anna couldn't decide whether to frown or smile at that. She was glad her mother was so happy with her and Elsa, but she was also mad she was getting so much praise for simply caring about her own sibling. Wasn't that what Elsa was _supposed_ to get? Yet their mother was making a giant deal out of it. Since she wasn't sure what to say, she said nothing for once.

While Idun spoke with Anna, Agdar talked to Elsa. "Elsa, you make sure you and Anna come visit sometime soon. I know I've…hurt you a lot and you aren't…aren't unaffected by that now-you cry altogether too much, you panic too easily, you don't value yourself enough, etc-but I am proud of you all the same," Agdar said awkwardly.

Elsa's big blue eyes filled with tears as she hesitantly reached to give her daddy a hug. _May I give you a hug? Please?_ "You…y-you're…proud of m-me?" she whispered. Her voice was shaky, unsure whether she could really, truly believe those words. She had heard that so few times from her father that it was still difficult for her to believe he could think something good about her.

"Yes," Agdar replied shortly. He didn't return Elsa's hug, but he awkwardly rumpled her hair and gave her a sincere smile. "You've done a very good job as queen so far, Elsa. Keep it up."

Elsa smiled back and quickly swiped at her tears. "Can…may I ask a rather…awkward question, Papa?" she asked. When Agdar nodded, Elsa added quietly, "What can…what can I do t' make you like me as much as Anna?" Elsa clasped her hands together nervously, not quite sure what her daddy would say. _Elsa, why did you ask that? That's rude and awkward and you're causing trouble._

Agdar was taken aback at Elsa's question; she hadn't asked if that were true; she had asked what she could do to fix that herself. _What am I supposed to tell her?_ He caught Idun's gaze, which told him in no uncertain terms that he had better not lie to Elsa to save his own skin. Anna was glaring at him, and she looked like she was about to yank Elsa away to protect her or something. "Elsa, I...you can't do anything, Elsa. You…wouldn't be you."

Elsa slowly backed away, biting her lip as she tried not to cry. Ice crackled beneath her feet, a tell-tale sign that she was more than just a little upset. She knew _exactly_ what Agdar's euphemistic words meant. That she _couldn't_ do anything to get her parents to love her like they did Anna. That she would always be defective and messed up to them simply because of her ice, and probably her bad leg, too. And her emotional issues. And whatever else Anna was that she wasn't. "Anna…Anna, I need to go," she said softly. She managed to catch Anna's eyes and look towards the North Mountain, telling her little sister where she wanted to go. _Come find me later. I need to escape for a litte while_ , she tried to communicate her message. _Elsa, don't go all the way up there just for this. That's ridiculously stupid and you know it. You are not doing that._

Anna didn't even acknowledge Elsa's 'message'; instead she grabbed the older girl by the wrist and held her hand out to their father. "Do you realize the _messed up_ , _defective_ , whatever-else-you-called-her girl in front of you that you keep dissing literally has both the authority and the physical ability to make you shut up on the spot?! She has the power to do whatever she wants to you!" Anna spat vehemently. "And yet she doesn't do _anything_! You know why?! 'Cause my stupid sister still loves you and care about your opinion enough to ask you _what she could do differently to make her own parents love her the same as her sibling!_ It's not fair!" The remnants of Anna's temporary water powers were goading her on to say and do what she did next. "Look at Elsa's hand, Dad! Just look!"

Elsa looked away and tried to pull her wrist out of Anna's tight grasp. She knew ice was probably all over her clenched fist; she could feel it cutting into her palm because she was trying so hard not to let it out. Her free hand was harmlessly leaking ice on the ground behind her, but she refused to let it out of her other one because she didn't want to risk hurting Anna or her father…or her mother or Kiara. _Elsa, calm down. You need to calm down. This is exactly what Papa meant. And my leg hurts again. Calm down. Calm down, calm down, calm down._

Agdar stepped backwards, but he was also biting the inside of his lip, unsure what to do. _I made that girl upset again. What am I supposed to do that would help Elsa? I hurt her…again. I should just leave. Anna can help her._ "Anna, I think she is hurting herself," he said flatly. Then he took his wife's hand and marched up the gangplank to the ship and turned back to wave.

Anna impulsively shot a stream of water towards her father, getting both him and their mother all wet. "I'm sort of like Elsa at the moment!" she shouted. "So there!"

Elsa was horrified at Anna's reaction, even through her tears and shaking. She flinched and hid her face against Anna's shoulder. "Anna, s-stop…please…you'll just make it…make it worse," she whispered. _I'm going to need to send Papa an apology…_

* * *

Back inside, Kiara finished up her final visit with her brother Hans before heading out to the ship. "Don't be a stupid jerk," Hans told his little sister.

"Oh, I won't. That's your specialty," Kiara deadpanned back. She glanced around the cell and grinned. "Looks like you've got slightly better quarters than when you were first put here."

That was true. While the dungeon cell was no pleasant, plush bedroom like the one Hans remembered from the Southern Isles castle, there were now basic toiletry items in it. He was no longer left in chains when he was locked in the cell after his work for the day was done, and the place was clean. Hans smirked at his sister and just said, "I suppose it would be easier to stage a coup now," although he had no intentions of doing any such thing.

"You won't do that. You like Elsa, just like silly ol' Espen does," Kiara replied, putting her hands on her hips.

Hans sighed. He had long since given up on trying to convince his (bratty) little sister that that wasn't true. It _was_ true, after all. Hans hadn't seen Elsa much; he had a strong suspicion that she had made sure that was the case. He really couldn't blame her; he knew he would have done something much worse if he'd been in her place. Like executing him. She had more than enough reason to do that. Once his sentence was over, Hans had already decided that he would never return to the Southern Isles. There was nothing for him there. Quite honestly he thought Kiara's decision to return home was a terrible one, and if he was completely honest with himself, he was actually disappointed.

The two "Southern Isles disappointments" could have gone off someplace else and made their own future. An honest one, this time.

Well, mostly. A bit of charm wouldn't hurt if he were to start in a new place where no one knew him, right?

"…and hey, are you even listening?!" Kiara exclaimed indignantly.

"Oh, of course I am listening to the charming rants by the Princess Kiara," Hans replied smoothly, knowing quite well that Kiara wouldn't be fooled by that for a second.

Kiara rolled her eyes. "I _said_ , you're never gonna have a chance with my best friend anyways, but you still ought to apologize, 'cause it'd be the right thing to do," she repeated. Kiara knew Elsa's feelings on such things quite well, that she was _not_ interested and would appreciate it very much if people would just let her be.

"That ice girl is rubbing off on you. The old Kiara never would have said 'because it's the right thing to do'," Hans responded instantly.

"Yes, Elsa has rubbed off on me, and I'm proud of it," Kiara retorted, holding her head high.

"As long as you see to it her touchiness and panicking things don't rub off on you too," Hans said, meaning every word. He had no intentions of taking advantage of Elsa again, but that was the one thing about her he despised with a passion. That meant she had allowed others to get to her, even though she covered it up in public well.

Kiara rolled her eyes again. "Those things aren't Elsa's fault, and you shut up and quit picking on her. I gotta go…the ship's gonna leave soon. Bye."

* * *

Upstairs a few minutes later, Anna tried to get Elsa to stop hiding her hand, knowing Elsa just didn't want anyone to see that she had hurt herself…again. "Miss Elsa, stop this," Gerda said firmly. "I already know what you did to yourself, so you don't need to hide your hand. And you haven't done your therapy for today, either." When Elsa neither moved nor responded, Gerda shook her head and just signaled to Anna to hold Elsa still and not let her make any excuses to leave. In Gerda's mind, the young queen was merely being stubborn because she was needlessly embarrassed, and she would not put up with that behavior from Elsa, queen or not. That and Elsa had let her father hurt her by saying something she already knew.

Elsa felt her little sister's arms holding her securely and relaxed a bit, although she still didn't let Gerda see her hand. It hurt, and she had a sinking feeling it was probably more torn up than Gerda suspected. Elsa's hands were still sensitive, even after all the months of not having to wear gloves, and she knew her 'upset ice' could be sharp. _I hurt myself again. I did_ not _want to do that. Anna's going to think I'm getting worse again. I don't want to worry her._

 _Why does Papa think like that…no, I am not going to think about that. I'm being ungrateful. At least Papa does genuinely love me at least a little bit, even if he doesn't like Anna and me equally. Of course he doesn't. Why should he?_

"Elsa, _please_ let Gerda fix your hand," Anna begged. "You got it all cut up because you were forcing your ice towards yourself and not anyone else." She frowned; Elsa was no longer all tense and shaking, but she had gone limp and was keeping her face hidden in Anna's shoulder. "Gerda, something's the matter with Elsa," Anna whispered worriedly.

Gerda set her mouth in a thin line and shook her head firmly, although her eyes were soft and caring. "There is nothing the matter with her, Miss Anna," she assured the worried princess. She abruptly grabbed Elsa's hand, which made Elsa yelp in surprise; and quickly tended to the small cuts all over her palm and fingers. "There. All taken care of. Now, Miss Elsa, I don't care what your father told you. It was something you already knew. I know it was. Get yourself together. Immediately. I don't care what absolute authority you have; I love you and I will not have any charge I am taking care of let other people's opinions affect her like this. Pick your head up and really _think_ about it. Do you really think your father's opinion is your fault? Your logical side, not your emotions."

Elsa thought for a long moment before slowly shaking her head. _At least Papa cares about me some. That's good. He doesn't think I'm worthless, anyways…_

Before Elsa could say anything, Gerda pointed at her injured hand. "And that, Elsa Ingrid Nicoletta Grieg! Look what you did!" she scolded. "That _is_ your fault, and you know it. You hate things on your hands because of those gloves, and for good reason, and I had to bandage it all up just now, and now I am going to tell you you virtually can't use that hand for at least a few days." Gerda's voice softened when she saw the tears beginning to trickle down Elsa's pale cheeks. "Miss Elsa, I refuse to let you get lost in emotional pain again," she said gently. "I don't care what's so-called 'wrong' with you. I don't care that you're different. But I do care that you're hurting because of useless words someone told you. You are _not_ going to let that happen."

"I'm…I'm so _tired_ of trying t-to get better," Elsa whispered. "It's like…like I literally _can't_. That hurts, too….Gerda…c-can't you just fix me? Please?" she asked plaintively. _No, she can't Elsa. That is stupid. And illogical. And ridiculous. What are you talking about anyway? Of course you can get better. You're just too stupid to know how._

"Miss Elsa, if there really is something wrong in your head, no, I can't fix that," Gerda told her honestly. "But I don't think you need any sort of medicine or drugs or the like, not that we would have any medicine to help with that sort of thing anyway. I think you just need some peace and quiet time, along with someone you trust to talk to and help you…but not let you act like an eight-year-old, either."

"Do…d'you think there's something wrong with me mentally?" Elsa asked, unsure if she wanted to hear the answer.

Gerda just gave the worried girl a comforting hug and then pulled Anna close as well. "I think that you still _might_ be a bit depressed, and definitely overly prone to anxiety and panicking, yes. Perhaps a mild case of that post-traumatic stress thing, I don't know. But I also think you are perfect just like you are, Miss Elsa. You can handle those issues just fine. I know you can. You have people here to help you whenever you need it, and even when you don't, to be honest." Gerda honestly loved both sisters very much. They were almost like her own children, especially Elsa, who hadn't really had much care from her parents, unlike Anna.

Elsa suddenly felt much better. She considered Gerda an expert on such things, even though she knew Gerda would tell her otherwise. "Thank you, Gerda." She made a face at her injured hand, disgusted with herself for letting that happen yet again. _Maybe I can learn to redirect my ice so it doesn't get forced out when I get upset like that. If I'd known how to do that, I could have channeled all the "upset ice" through my other hand or let it form on the ground or something…_

* * *

Anna suddenly bounced to her feet, her blue-green eyes sparkling happily as an idea popped into her head. She had spotted the old ballet barre she'd used for dancing when she was younger stuffed in the far corner of her messy room. "Gerda, can you make dancing part of Elsa's therapy for her leg? It'd be something different and I still think Elsa can too dance and she just thinks she can't." Anna started dragging the barre out of the corner and began tossing stuff to the corners of the room so there was plenty of open floor space.

Elsa looked worriedly at Gerda. "I was terrible at dancing even before I hurt my leg," she whispered. "I don't want t' disappoint Anna, but…" Elsa clearly remembered the dance lessons she'd had before the accident. While she had been naturally flexible and had good balance, unlike Anna, she just couldn't seem to get the steps to come out properly…also unlike Anna. For whatever inexplicable reason, while usually clumsy Anna was actually quite good at dancing, usually elegant and coordinated Elsa was like a fish out of water. Poor Elsa would know exactly what she was supposed to do…she _was_ good at memorizing whole sequences of steps…and then just couldn't execute them correctly. She had genuinely tried, but eventually she had resorted to begging her parents to allow her to stop taking lessons, to no avail. Of course she _had_ been allowed to stop her dance lessons after the accident; that was just about the only good thing about that whole thing.

Gerda gently pulled Elsa to her feet. "I think you can try, Miss Elsa. You are the queen; you need to know how to dance anyways."

"Not ballet!" Elsa protested. "And I don't like the idea of waltzing or whatever else…all those people I don't know _touching_ me and holding hands and just…no. I don't like this! Not one little bit!" She glanced down at her braced leg and then at Anna's hopeful face and back again. _I should at least try again. It's the least I can do after everything Anna's done for me._ "What if I step on someone's foot?" she asked finally.

"You're supposed to do that when you're learning," Anna replied, smiling. "You know what, I think I'm gonna tell Kai to find us a teacher. Maybe your friend Nikoleta will wanna take lessons too, and you'll probably want Anikka to…And Kristoff will be back tomorrow, and he can join our class. For the non-ballet part. He's _much_ worse at dancing than you could possibly be, Elsa," Anna said, only half teasing. She had tried several times to teach Kristoff to dance, and while he could bluff his way through if need be, that was only because Anna was leading and could cover up his (numerous) mistakes.

Elsa nervously began biting at a fingernail. The last thing she wanted was more people to see her make a fool of herself trying to dance. All that would happen was she would fall and look ridiculous. Okay…maybe not the _last_ thing-she could think up far, far worse things that could happen-but it was still most definitely not something she wanted to do. _I can't ask Anna to let me opt out of this. That's selfish. She's just excited about something, and she_ should _be able to do that after all the trouble we've had over the last few months._ "I'll…I'll try?" Elsa's voice still sounded hesitant, but she managed to give Anna a genuine smile all the same.

Anna clapped her hands excitedly and started pulling her sister over to the barre. "I'll teach you some stuff so you'll already know it when the teacher comes," she informed Elsa. "And then we'll-"

Gerda shook her head. "Princess Anna," she interrupted firmly. "Slow down. Your sister's back isn't healed yet, and I don't want her pulling on the skin too much and making it bleed again. I know she wouldn't tell you that because she wouldn't want to disappoint you, so I am saying it. Take it easy. Why don't you show her the arm positions or something? Also, you two can't do ballet in those dresses, either. And Miss Elsa isn't allowed to wear anything that'll be constricting on her back until it's better."

"I can make something that will work, if no one else is going to see me," Elsa offered shyly.

Anna gave Elsa's good hand a reassuring squeeze. "I'll lock the door if you need me to," she promised. Now that she was actually thinking about it, she had no idea just how much her sister would be able to do. What if Elsa got upset because her bad leg wouldn't let her do something? Or what if she fell and hurt herself?

Elsa nodded gratefully and glanced at Gerda. "Would you be willing to stay and help me with my leg first before Anna shows me anything? Maybe that will help a little bit." _I hope so, anyways. Why did I agree to this?!_

"Of course, Miss Elsa. I think that is a very good idea."

* * *

"Elsa, I know you don't think so, but I think your leg _has_ improved," Anna informed her sister awhile later. Both she and Elsa were just sitting on the carpet in Anna's room. Elsa had let Anna watch Gerda helping her with her leg, per Gerda's suggestion that Anna should know how to help Elsa herself. Since Elsa still couldn't move her bad leg or control the movements she _could_ make very well on her own, she needed someone to move it for her and she would just help as well as she could. Only after all the passive stretching would Gerda ask Elsa to try to do something by herself. Anna reached and gave Elsa's bad foot a gentle squeeze, knowing Elsa hated how her left foot always flopped limply to one side if she wasn't concentrating hard on it or wearing her brace. "Don't be embarrassed, Elsa. You're still just my sweet big sister all the same," she said reassuringly.

Elsa continued staring at her legs stretched in front of her, but she smiled a tiny bit at Anna's words. _Anna doesn't want to get rid of me or throw me away. I know she doesn't. And I need to get it together. Gerda is right…those_ were _useless words. Papa's opinions aren't my fault, even if I feel like they are. That's stupid._ Elsa instinctively held her injured hand protectively against her chest, thinking what she might be able to do differently next time.

Anna frowned. "I'm sorry I let you end up hurting yourself again," she apologized. Seeing Elsa with her hand all wrapped up bothered her, not so much because Elsa was hurt, but because of how it had happened. And like Elsa, it reminded Anna of the way Elsa had always worn gloves before.

Elsa's head snapped towards Anna, her blue eyes suddenly sharp. " _Don't_ apologize for things that aren't your fault," she ordered. "You defended me, and you didn't have to. Gerda is right. I shouldn't have let something I already knew affect me like that. This," she held out her bandaged hand, " _is_ my fault. Not yours. What _was_ your fault was making everything worse by shouting at Papa and dumping water all over him, of all things. You owe him an apology, not me."

"Well, he owes you, like, five million apologies, so I shan't give him one," Anna replied stubbornly. "It's so dumb! I mean, I know he does care about you now, but he still shouldn't love one of his daughters more than the other one. It's not fair!"

"I don't think Papa _can_ love us both equally, Anna," Elsa said softly. "Mama would probably choose you if she had to pick, too, and I _know_ she genuinely loves me. I can't blame them or get upset with them for that…I mean, just look at me. Nothing but a sad, broken little girl both inside and out. I have no value to anyone beyond having ice powers that help defend my country. And I messed up even that last summer...most of my life, really." She wasn't crying, but her tone of voice sounded both pained and yet flat at the same time, as if she were trying to distance herself from what she was saying and not succeeding. "I know Gerda tells me otherwise, that I'm s'posed to have value just as a human girl, but…but I don't feel like I do. And I'm sorry, Anna. I'm sorry I can't be the big sister you deserve. I'm sorry I can't…heal inside and act like a normal girl my age. I just don't know _how_."

"Well, you have value to _me,_ Elsa," Anna replied immediately. "And I think you're a perfect big sister, and you can too heal inside. You just need to give yourself a chance." Anna dearly wished she could just erase all the damage that had been inflicted on Elsa for so long. Sure, Elsa _was_ far better off than she had been for all those years isolated in her room, but even after the Great Thaw, she continued struggling to get better all through the crazy events of the past months. She was often stressed out; she had dealt with more attempts on her life and/or position than most people would deal with in a lifetime. No wonder she felt like she couldn't heal inside properly and 'be a big sister', whatever she'd meant by that. Anna thought she would have gone crazy if she were in Elsa's place. But Elsa was still…Elsa. No, Elsa was most definitely not completely okay, but she remained her usual self; even her mischievous streak and her sense of humor were still there, even if she didn't employ them very often.

This was obviously apparent a minute later when Elsa had broken the silence with a deadpanned, "So, enough with my depressing, if factual, train of thought. Are you still going to attempt to teach me how to dance?" Elsa's expression was virtually unreadable, but Anna could see both eager anticipation and nervousness in her sister's blue eyes.

Anna grinned. "Yep!" She waited until Elsa had fastened her brace back on her weak leg and then helped Elsa to her feet. "Okay, so first I'll show you the arm positions like Gerda suggested. You prob'ly already know 'em though, really…"

Several frustrated tries later, Anna finally realized what their teacher from when they were little hadn't. While Elsa would _mentally_ remember things the first time she was told them, and she was indeed putting her arms in the right positions, she looked stiff and awkward because she couldn't seem to hold her fingers and hand in the right position. "Elsa, you aren't supposed to stick out your thumb like that. You know how you hold your hand when you make your signature snowflake? Do it like that," Anna suggested. "Just try it with your good hand, though. Not the bandaged one," she added hurriedly, not wanting Elsa to hurt herself any further.

Elsa smiled happily a second later when Anna's suggestion immediately fixed the problem. _Maybe this won't be so bad._

 _ **A/N:**_ **So the sisters' parents leaving didn't exactly go very well. No worries, that'll get fixed soon.:)**

 **And yes, Elsa genuinely isn't very good at dancing; it's just not her thing. I think I might write a one-shot about little Elsa and little Anna having their dance lessons...hmm...**

 **Next chapter coming soon!:)**


	15. Chapter 15

**A/N: Thanks to everyone who's followed/favorited and/or is reading but not reviewing:)**

 **Olivia O'Neil-Thank you:) Maybe not 'decent' quite yet, but he's at least thinking, if that makes any sense.:P That's what I thought too; Elsa needed to be told the truth. Agreed-there's no way Elsa would really be good at dancing; she could get 'okay' at it, but she's never going to be much good because she won't like it.:/**

 **Elsa Tomago-Yep, I think it'll be easier for Elsa to get better without her parents in Arendelle. Elsa's not really 'keeping Hans in the castle'; Hans is just finishing out his sentence. Then he'll be gone. Don't forget, Hans doesn't want to go back to the Southern Isles anyway; he wouldn't have gone home with Kiara even if he could have. That being said, Kiara's not going to be 100% gone from the storyline yet.:) After this chapter, you'll know what Elsa's going to do as far as the dancing is concerned. Part of the trouble is that she's not just uncomfortable with the idea; she's genuinely not good at it and her bad leg doesn't help, either.:/ I don't want to make a promise as to when, but I WILL write a one-shot about that sometime soon:)**

 **moohamquest-Thank you:) Elsa isn't exactly good at seeing herself like she really is; she just sees the bad and that's it.:/ But she'll be (much) better by the end of the story.:) Like I told Elsa Tomago, I don't want to promise when, but I'll write a one-shot about that sometime soon:)**

 **orang biasa-Thank you:) Honestly that's one of the main reasons I had the girls' parents leave. They are not going to help Elsa get better even when they try.:/ You're welcome and thank _you_ :)**

 **On to the story!**

The lesson abruptly paused a few minutes later when Anna noticed a single tear trickling down Elsa's cheek after Anna had tried to teach her a few basic steps at the barre. "What's the matter? I thought you were doing pretty good," Anna said honestly.

 _I'm frustrated because of something you can't fix, no matter how good of a teacher you are,_ Elsa thought, but she just shook her head and didn't say anything. Anna was showing her things simple enough that she was absolutely sure that if her leg wasn't messed up, even her awkward, terrible-at-dancing self would be able to do them properly on her own. Maybe the teacher they'd had when they were little had simply been moving way too fast for her.

Anna noticed Elsa glaring daggers at her braced leg and instantly had a suspicion of what was going on. "Elsa, if your leg is making you frustrated, that's silly. We're just gonna figure out how to teach you to dance anyways," she said firmly.

Elsa bit her lip before blurting out, "It's just making me so _mad_! It's obvious to me that while I might still be awful at dancing, that teacher we had when we were little was moving too fast for me. I would have been able to learn _something_ if he'd moved slowly like you're doing now. Anna, I _know_ I could easily do properly what you're trying to teach me if I didn't have to wear that brace. I _know_ I could. But no; I can't bend that leg; I can't point that foot. It actually hurts if I try to stand on it so I can at least do the steps with my good leg. And both of them are so _tired_ already, and it hasn't even been thirty minutes!" _Shut up, Elsa. You're going to make Anna feel bad._ A sudden idea struck her, and she found herself trying to stifle giggles, thinking she was being ridiculous. "Maybe you should teach me how to flip around that bar instead. Yes, I meant bar, not bar-with-extra-r-and-e," she quipped. "At least my awkward legs wouldn't matter so much."

"I don't know how to do that, you stinker," Anna replied, laughing along with Elsa as she pictured her big sister flipping upside down and whatever else like she'd done when she was little. Anna abruptly stopped laughing and made a face when she realized Elsa's legs were shaking under her, and it wasn't because she was upset or panicking since she was genuinely giggling. That and she was obviously clutching the barre tightly with her good hand, as if struggling to hold herself up. "Elsa, let's just do something else now," Anna suggested quickly. "D'you have any paperwork to do today? Let me go get it and you can just sit for awhile."

Elsa's expression immediately darkened. "I can get my paperwork myself," she said flatly, although she didn't protest as Anna helped her sit down on the soft carpet. Her legs really were exhausted, and she actually felt relieved that Anna had taken over and decided she couldn't do anything else at the moment, despite her inner chagrin. "There are quite a few letters to reply to…most are personal ones, but there are two business ones that need to be taken care of first. They're all on my desk," she explained reluctantly. "There are some for you, too." _And I can't even write at the moment with my hand like it is. Great. Not._ "Will you…will you help me write my replies? Please?" Elsa asked, her cheeks slightly pink in embarrassment.

Anna immediately nodded and gave Elsa a reassuring hug. "Now your writing hand is hurt instead of mine and I get to help you instead," she announced matter-of-factly. "Although I bet you could etch them in little paper-sized sheets of ice with your good hand, like you did with those blueprints for your ice amusement park when you broke your arm last summer." _Well,_ Elsa _didn't break her arm…that was kind of my fault…_ Anna scowled and just squeezed Elsa tighter, thinking that nearly every time Elsa had gotten hurt, it had been at least partly Anna's fault.

"Anna…please don't hug me so tightly. My back still hurts when you do that," Elsa said hesitantly, not wanting to make her little sister any more upset than she was already. Elsa knew quite well that Anna squishing her like that usually meant Anna was worried or felt bad for something. A moment's thought easily told Elsa what was wrong even though Anna hadn't said anything, and she quickly pulled away and gave Anna a slightly lopsided smile. "Anna, I'm okay. I don't _feel_ okay sometimes, but I'm fine. At least mostly. And in any event, it isn't your fault." _You told me freezing you to death wasn't my fault…_

"You just told me not even an hour ago that you were 'nothing but a sad, broken little girl' and that you didn't have any value! And now you say you're fine! Which is it?! And that" Anna pointed to her sister's braced leg, "is not ok! You weren't born like that. Then I wouldn't particularly think about it at all. So that's not fair! I wanna fix it so you're all better!"

Elsa's blue eyes looked pained at Anna's words, but she didn't cry. "That sad, broken little girl _is_ worthless. She needs to just disappear somewhere and never come back. I…I _hate_ her," she whispered sharply. "She just ruins everything. She hurts herself; she hurts her best friend and literally killed her last summer. I know this sounds ridiculous, but it's like there are three Elsas in my head. The broken, stupid one that panics and cries all the time; the grown-up, logical one that hides everything constantly; and the one in between that _is_ damaged inside but still manages to be logical and likes being mischievous and silly sometimes. And I hate all of them."

"Elsa, that _does_ sound ridiculous. You know why? Because the first two aren't accurate descriptions, you stinker," Anna told her gently. "You do not cry 'all the time'-you aren't doing it right this second even though I know you're upset-and you obviously don't 'hide everything constantly' because you told me what you just said. And why would you hate the third description you gave me? I think a girl who's logical AND mischievous AND silly would be a very good friend, don't you think? 'Damage' inside can heal. It just takes longer. And that's all right."

Elsa just gave Anna a sideways glance. "What if it's permanent damage? You can't put a brace on a damaged heart and make it at least sort of okay like you can a damaged leg," she said softly.

Anna decided that despite her own feelings toward Elsa's leg being permanently hurt, she would just take her sister's comparison and run with it. "Yes, you can," Anna replied quickly. "That brace supports your leg and helps you function more so-called 'normally' easier, right?"

Elsa nodded, but she just looked puzzled. _Of course that's what it's for, Anna. Where are you going with this?_

"Well, you have a different kind of brace for a mind and heart that needs support to function so-called 'normally', too. Me. And Gerda. And Kai, and Anikka, and everyone else that cares about you. Elsa, we _love_ you very much. Just like you are. You know what else? I think it doesn't matter one bit if it's permanent damage, even though I don't think it is. You'll always just be my sweet big sister with the silly mischievous streak and the goofy sense of humor and the really awesome ice powers and everything else that makes you _you_." Anna grinned as she watched her sister's expression brighten. Elsa had her arms wrapped around her middle, hugging herself, but she seemed at least mostly content now. _She probably just wants a hug but doesn't want her back to start hurting again. At least Elsa seems to be all right now._ Anna hopped to her feet and added, "You wait here. I'll go get those letters and I'll be right back."

* * *

Soon both girls were reading and replying to their letters, Elsa with her little ice etchings and Anna with regular pen and paper. A few minutes later, Elsa jerked her head up from her writing when she heard a badly covered sniffle and paper being scrunched up. "Anna, what's the matter?"

"Nothing, just…Elsa, can I watch you reply to yours instead?" Anna asked, scooting closer to her older sister.

Elsa narrowed her eyes suspiciously and snatched the letter Anna had scrunched up before Anna could protest. A quick glance over the smoothed-out paper immediately told Elsa what was wrong. _Not this again._

A second later, a ball of ice containing the crumpled letter crashed against the wall. That made Elsa downright angry. She wouldn't have reacted that way if the mean letter(s) had been directed to her, but when they were sent to Anna…well, that was a different story. Her blue eyes flashed dangerously as she turned to Anna. "Are there any more like that?" Elsa's voice was quiet, yet sharp enough to slice steel.

Anna nodded and involuntarily shivered. The air was suddenly freezing, and Anna was very glad _she_ wasn't the one Elsa was angry with. An angry Elsa was not something to trifle with. While Anna rarely saw her sister get angry, when she did, she could be downright frightening, although not to Anna. Like right now, Elsa had stood up and started pacing back and forth across the room, an icy 'angry yellow' path trailing behind her. The frightened and sad girl from just a few minutes ago was gone, replaced by the powerful Snow Queen wanting to protect her little sister.

Elsa abruptly stopped her pacing and sat back down on the carpet next to Anna because she felt like she was about to fall since she was still a bit worn out from earlier, but the subtly angry expression remained. "I will take care of that, Anna. You will not be receiving any more vapid, ignorant, asinine, rude, rebarbative… _detritus_!" she announced, resisting the urge to rant any further about it. _Why would someone even do that? It wasn't even just one…_

"Elsa, why'd whoever that is say that stuff?" Anna asked in a small voice. "I mean, I know I shouldn't care at all-I don't even know who it is-but they spent enough time writing the same mean stuff in a bunch of different letters, and-"

"Because they are all the nasty things they wrote themselves," Elsa interrupted as she gave her little sister a protective hug. "Anna, _please_ try not to be like me and let mean words hurt you. All it does is make you feel awful while whoever said it runs around perfectly fine. I mean it, Anna. You will not be getting any more letters like that, I promise. Not from that person, at least, and I don't think anyone else will do that." Elsa knew that if the letters had been sent to her, she would probably just ignore them, but since they were sent to Anna, she was going to actually do something about it.

"What are you gonna do, Elsa?"

Elsa's blue eyes darkened at that question. "Use my authority this time," she said quietly.

Anna just looked intrigued now, the hurt feelings forgotten. She trusted that Elsa would defend her; she knew she wasn't any of the nastily insulting names in those letters…it had just still made her upset. "How are you going to do that? The person doesn't live in Arendelle, and you haven't got authority anywhere else," she pointed out.

Elsa gave Anna a lopsided smile. "Yes, I do. If I did something and I was accused of overstepping authority outside my country, all I would need to do is show that person those horrid letters. I have diplomatic immunity, and I daresay I would be left alone. In any event, I am merely going to send a less…nice reply than we did last time. You've seen my writing; I can express subtle threats on paper. Besides, my main issue with this is that it made you upset, not the fact that it was sent. People are going to say nasty things about us simply because of our position, Anna. Just remember that," she explained. "Also, if any more letters arrive from that person, you can either just throw them away unopened or give them to me and I'll check them for you to see if on the tiny chance the person apologizes. Does that sound like a plan?"

Anna nodded and grinned. _I'm glad Elsa's my sister. She could have just said I was being touchy and stupid and that she had a lot worse things to deal with herself, but she didn't._

Elsa's confident expression faded as she changed the subject. "By the way, I would _very_ much like it if I could pass on your little dance class idea. I'd like to be able to walk the rest of the day without having to sit down, thank you very much," she said ruefully. "Maybe I could just participate in the first ten minutes or something and then play the music on the piano for the rest of you?" Elsa offered. _Anna, please understand…_ "I can honestly say I did not hate doing what you were trying to teach me earlier-it actually could be fun-but I just can't do it. At least not a lot, and I'm sorry. They're _still_ tired, and we've been sitting for awhile. And the thought of trying and failing in front of a teacher I don't know makes me feel really nervous and self-conscious, to be honest."

Anna frowned as she glanced at Elsa's legs. Just how much was Elsa not telling her? If Elsa had outright said what she'd just said, then it had to be pretty bad. Elsa hated admitting she couldn't do something. "Do they hurt?" she asked gently, hoping Elsa would tell the truth about it.

"The…the braced one does. It…it aches," Elsa admitted hesitantly. "My right one is just tired because it was working too much, though, I think." _Anna, please don't fuss over me. Just…please let me try to make it better on my own time….please…_

"Why didn't you say anything before?!" Anna asked indignantly. "Good grief, Elsa, you stinker!" A second later Anna received an annoyed yelp and an ice cube down her back from Elsa when she picked the older girl up and deposited her on the bed. "Elsa, I am _not_ fussing over you; I am giving you what someone whose leg is sore is supposed to get. You stay there," she ordered. Anna carefully propped her sister's bad leg up with a couple pillows and then hopped up on the bed next to her. " _Now_ I'll leave you alone. Well, not alone-I'll sit with you-but I won't so-called fuss anymore or anything. Wait, just a second, I'll go get the rest of our letters. Be right back."

* * *

"Anna, I have to get up, even if I don't feel like it. I can't lay around all day. I have work to do with Niko, and Anikka and Eliot have lessons to do," Elsa told her sister a minute later. "But…thank you for helping me and yet not fussing over me. I shouldn't have dropped ice cubes on you. I'm sorry." She slowly stood up and gave Anna a reassuring smile. "I'll be fine. I will just have to be even slower than usual," she quipped, only half joking. _Come on, Elsa, what is wrong with you? Don't be scared. That bad leg of yours_ can't _collapse under you while you're wearing your brace. You know that._

Anna frowned worriedly as she watched Elsa scrunch her eyes shut and clearly start purposely taking slow, deep breaths, like she was trying to calm herself down. Anna was tempted to talk to Elsa and try to help her, but she said nothing, knowing in her bones that Elsa _needed_ to calm down on her own. 'Helping' her would just make her feel inadequate or whatever other nonsense she thought up all that much more; she would just think she was being a burden on others or something. Still, Anna reached for her sister's thin shoulder and gave her a comforting squeeze when her blue eyes blinked open a few seconds later. "Elsa, I really think you should take today off and rest. I'm not trying to fuss over you; I'm just worried about you," she told Elsa.

"I can't. I have work to do. Sore, tired legs are not a satisfactory reason to take a whole weekday off, Anna, and you know it. It's not even the weekend." Elsa shook her head, refusing to let herself even consider taking Anna's admittedly logical suggestion. "If you want to help me, I have a job for you," she added, giving Anna a small smile. "One I _really_ don't want to do but that you might actually enjoy. I'd like you to go door-to-door around Arendelle and find any children that are either being mistreated or are simply unable or otherwise aren't going to school or receiving lessons for whatever reason. The people will be more likely to tell you that kind of information than they would me. Make it clear that as long as the lack of schooling isn't neglect, the parents are not in any trouble as of yet." Elsa's expression fell as she went on, "And if you find any abused ones, I want them brought right back here. So you will take four or five guards with you as well, for safety, but they will follow at a discreet distance behind you. You will signal them for help if need be."

"Um, Elsa…? I'm happy to do that for you, but what if I find a bunch of mistreated kids? Just how many extra mouths to feed are you planning to take in with us? Not that I don't think it's a nice thing to do, just…I don't know. And what makes you think I'm going to know if children are being mistreated from one visit? If the parents are smart, they'll hide the evidence somehow." Anna wasn't sure what to say. She knew Elsa had her heart set on helping _all_ the children in Arendelle, but she hadn't heard any more of a solid plan from Elsa beyond the contact crystal things. And if Elsa gave every abused child she could find one of those crystals, Elsa would put herself in danger to rescue them every time. Anna _knew_ that. She thought of the ugly mark marring Elsa's pale skin hidden beneath the bandages on her back. Something worse could happen next time. Anna had no doubt Elsa would willingly let herself be injured if it kept the child or children in question safe. Could she trust Elsa to use her magic to protect herself if need be? No, she could not. The silly girl hadn't done so the last time. Anna stared Elsa right in the eyes. "I want your word right this second that you'll use your magic to protect yourself _and_ the children if need be. Otherwise I want nothing to do with this. I don't want you letting yourself be hurt again just because you don't want to risk injuring someone who's a creep anyways."

Elsa had been just biting her lip and trying unsuccessfully not to pick at the bandages wrapped around her injured hand. Now she just blinked, not knowing what to say. _I can't lie to Anna. I won't…_ "I will use my magic to protect the children if need be," she said truthfully.

"And yourself!" Anna demanded, immediately regretting her outburst when she saw Elsa flinch, although not enough to make her back down. She pushed Elsa into a chair and then began pacing back and forth, growing more and more angry. Just _why_ couldn't stupid Elsa see that it was fine for her to help herself with her magic and not just others? Why did she have to be so stubborn? A sudden idea came to her and she marched back over to Elsa, who was just staring at Anna, her blue eyes wide. "If you won't promise that, then I am going to follow you every time you go help someone."

"You can't do that," Elsa squeaked. "You might get yourself hurt!"

"Exactly!" Anna retorted, obviously pleased with herself. She knew Elsa would do anything to keep Anna from getting hurt. "And I promise I won't do that if I know you'll protect yourself if need be."

Elsa frowned. "That's blackmail! And I could just order you to stay home since I'm the queen. I don't like using my authority on you like that, but I will if it keeps you safe," she said firmly.

"I don't care; I won't listen. Elsa, I just want you safe. I know you can easily defend yourself; I know you can. Why won't you do it, Elsa? You can defend yourself without even hurting your opponent, for goodness sakes. If you act like this about some creepy person hurting you, what would you do if I tried to hurt you or something? I mean, I wouldn't do that, but you've gotta see you have value all be yourself and-" Anna figuratively froze in horror at what her words had done as she realized just what she'd said.

"Let…y-you…do…it." Elsa remembered only too clearly what Jade had caused Anna to act like in that cave only a couple months before and her own reaction when Anna had taken her brace away from her and said some pretty cruel things to her. Nothing. She hadn't defended herself at all. Deep inside Elsa knew if she were to go through the same thing all over again, she wouldn't do anything differently in that cave, either. Before and after, yes. During, no. Tears streamed down her cheeks as she instinctively reached for her bad leg, as if that brace might be taken away from her all over again. Snowflakes swirled around her, and she was only vaguely aware that someone had gently picked her up. She struggled blindly through her tears to get the someone to put her down, but the someone only held her tighter. Ice crackled noisily, and she felt herself fall to the floor an instant after she heard a yelp that she wasn't sure was hers or someone else's. Had she hurt someone? What happened? _Stop it. Please stop! Just…make it stop._

 _Something hurts. I wish I could fix me._

Anna shouted for help when she saw what Elsa had done.

The older girl was trapped inside an ice bubble of her own creation.

 **A/N: There's something important in the next chapter that Elsa realizes. Yes, she's subconsciously trapped herself in an ice bubble (and she got upset again...), but there's something different as to how her magic reacted, and I'll let you guys figure out what it is.:)**

 **Next chapter coming soon:)**


	16. Chapter 16

**A/N: Thanks to everyone who's followed/favorited and/or is reading but not reviewing:)**

 **Olivia O'Neil-It's meant to be mostly a good thing, since if she would actually do it if she were in danger, she would be perfectly safe.:)**

 **bananas-rule-2016-That's okay:) I'm glad to know you're still reading! Well, that's not _exactly_ right (it's more Elsa simply feeling scared and her magic subconsciously reacting to that without making a huge mess), but she _was_ remembering things from when she was trapped in that cave, so you were on the right track.:) The difference is that Elsa's magic actually responded in a helpful manner this time, even though she was really scared and upset.**

 **Elsa Tomago-Don't worry, Elsa will be fine.:) I'll just say no, she is not going to go along with Anna's plans for dance classes for very long. She only promised Anna she would _try_ , after all. I figured connecting the two seemed logical, and if people were only reading one or the other, they still shouldn't be confused by it.:) Anna also knows that Elsa might order her to stay home, but that she also won't really do anything if Anna defies her "orders", either.:P Which is both a bad thing and a good thing. Yep, Elsa magic reacted to thte memories...but they actually did something HELPFUL instead of going all over the place or making her explode ice and snow everywhere.:/**

 **orang biasa-Well, here it is:) True, we all know Elsa is going to be fine, lol. Yep, they are. I like having everything have a connection to the other stories.:) Kristoff is in this chapter a bit. I don't feel as comfortable writing his character, so I tend to come up with explanations for why he isn't around. (Recently he's not been around because he didn't like being around the girls' parents. The parents are gone, so he's back now.:))**

 **raven678-That's okay:) Technically all she has to do is calm down. No weirdly complicated maneuvers, really. The only difference (and the reason I had that happen) was to show that Elsa's magic is more closely attuned with her mind, her emotions, and her body now. It actually reacted in a logical/helpful/non-destructive way this time even though Elsa was really upset and frightened. I suppose that doesn't really sound like a big deal per se, but I see it as a breakthrough for her. :) Lol, the whole 'dance lesson' thing Anna is so excited about is actually more of a transition thing to let something important to the plot happen:)**

 **On to the story:)**

A few minutes later, Anna and Nikoleta exchanged worried glances over Anikka's and Eliot's heads as they watched Kai shake his head. He and Gerda had come running into Anna's room the second he'd heard Anna's shouts for help, but he couldn't break Elsa out of her self-made icy prison. "It seems Miss Elsa trapped herself with her impenetrable ice," he said quietly. "We're not going to be able to get her out ourselves. I'm sorry."

Nikoleta could only stare in surprise at the unique situation in front of her. Never in her seventeen years could she have imagined she would be standing in the princess's room seeing the queen like this. She didn't belong here. What would Elsa think once she felt better and came to her senses? Sure, Elsa had been very friendly and understanding from the second Nikoleta had met her, but surely that would run out eventually. Nikoleta knew _she_ wouldn't have wanted her subjects seeing her like that. The weird thing was that while Nikoleta knew Elsa couldn't-or wouldn't-help herself right this second, if this had happened in some dangerous situation, Elsa was completely safe. No one could get to her no matter what they did. The young ice wielder was subconsciously showing just how strong her magic could be, and that made Nikoleta smile inside.

Eliot had noticed the way Elsa seemed to be upset about her leg somehow the second he'd come into the room. Now that everyone seemed to have given up trying to get Elsa out (even though they all stayed in the room), Eliot made his way over to Elsa as quickly as he could and awkwardly plopped down on the floor right outside the ice bubble. "Q…Queen Elsa…it's…o-k. You tol' m'…so, 'mem-'er?" Eliot put his hand flat against the ice right next to Elsa's bandaged hand, ignoring the coldness against his palm.

Elsa didn't seem to acknowledge the little boy at all (although she _had_ heard him…she just had no intentions of freeing herself until she was a hundred percent sure she wouldn't hurt anyone), but Eliot stayed where he was. That older girl had helped him and his big sister, so he would do his best to help her, too. Within moments, the others were doing the same thing…just sitting right outside that ice bubble, trying to assure Elsa that she was indeed safe.

Seconds passed, and finally _something_ changed. First the ice bubble's red and purple tinges lightened. Then it shuddered and cracked. The first thing Elsa saw when she opened her eyes was little Anikka's worried face staring down at her. Then she more felt than saw everyone else sitting around her. _Everyone…stayed with me? My magic made an ice bubble so I wouldn't hurt anyone…it actually automatically did something…_ helpful _? When I lost control? Does that mean I'm getting better even though I got scared and upset like that?_ Although Elsa didn't really consciously do anything, the ice bubble faded to a faint lavender and then just disappeared altogether. Elsa's blue eyes fluttered shut again as both happy and sad tears trickled down her cheeks in relief. Happy because she hadn't caused any damage and sad because…because something still hurt, she wasn't sure what.

Kai instinctively scooped Elsa into a fatherly hug. Part of him was glad that he hadn't been able to break Elsa free (if she could just do this next time someone attacked her, that would be perfect!), but mostly he had felt sick knowing that Elsa's worst danger was herself and he wouldn't have been able to protect her from that should she have…done anything. Kai hesitated for a moment before putting Elsa in Anna's arms and then reaching into his pocket. "Brought this just in case," he said quietly, holding up a sedative.

Anna frowned, knowing how Elsa hated taking medicine, but she quickly nodded. Even though Elsa seemed much, _much_ calmer and happier, there were still tears slowly trickling down her cheeks and her body seemed tense. _She_ needs _a stupid sedative whether she likes it or not. It'll make her sleep. Maybe she will feel better when it wears off._ Anna gently tilted her sister's head so Kai could give her the medicine and then just held her protectively while the sedative did its work. Thankfully Elsa didn't struggle much, not at all, really, beyond a clearly protesting 'don't want that'. "I love you, Elsa, but you're a great big stinker," Anna said softly.

Elsa made a barely audible whimper and then opened her eyes a bit, feeling confused and very, very sleepy. "Anna…not hurt me. I _know_ that…I'm stupid…sorry," she mumbled. "I didn't wanna throw Elsa away and kill her. Promised Anna I wouldn' do that," Elsa said honestly. Her quiet voice sounded tired and slurred from the medicine, and her big blue eyes fluttered shut as she felt her body relax all over. _That stinker Anna let Kai give me medicine stuffs to make me rest…_ she finally realized exactly what had happened.

"That dose will wear off before dinner, but she might be a bit loopy for a little while after that, Miss Anna," Kai told the princess. "Just put her to bed. Whatever work she had planned to do today will have to wait and that's that."

Anna nodded, but she was mostly focused on what Elsa had said before she'd fallen asleep. _You knew what we were all thinking. That you were going to end up doing something awful again. I believe you though, Elsa._ She hugged Elsa closer before standing up and tucking her under the covers. "We're all here for you, Elsa," Anna said quietly. "You're gonna be all right."

A contented smile spread over Elsa's pale face, as if she'd heard Anna's words.

* * *

A few minutes later, Nikoleta sat in a chair by Elsa's side, feeling awkward. Anna had told Nikoleta she was going to go start working on what Elsa had told her to do before she'd gotten all upset 'so she'll have a nice surprise when she wakes up', the princess had said. Nikoleta felt flattered that she was being trusted to make sure the _queen_ was all right, but she also felt like she shouldn't be allowed to do such a thing. So far her first 'assignment' in the castle wasn't hard; she just had to watch Elsa until Anna came back. She wished the nice lady, Gerda, was taking care of their queen instead. Gerda knew Elsa much better than Nikoleta did. Nikoleta still wasn't entirely sure what had happened to Elsa or what was wrong with her.

She thought of all her own nightmares before she'd come to the castle for help. Those were nasty replays of old memories. Sometimes they bothered her during the day, too. Maybe something similar was what was the matter with Elsa. After all, she wasn't much older than Nikoleta herself. She was just a girl, really, same as Nikoleta. "What happened to you to make you so…hurt?" Nikoleta asked aloud, knowing Elsa wasn't going to answer. She'd always assumed rich people like the royal family led idyllic lives for some reason. Obviously that wasn't true. At all. Nikoleta had somehow pictured Elsa mostly as "just" the powerful absolute monarch who happened to be able to wield ice. That _was_ true, sort of, at least by definition, but what Nikoleta had seen up close was just a normal girl with her own personal issues to work through that cared an awful lot about her people. She was down-to-earth and she didn't mind 'getting her hands dirty' so to speak if it meant that would help someone else.

 _Maybe Qu-no,_ Elsa. _She said to call her Elsa. Maybe Elsa's parents were mean to her, too? Either that or that crazy person that I think hurt both her and Princess Anna made her all upset like this…what was her name? Jane? Jade?..._ Nikoleta knew very, very little about the whole 'cave incident', just that she'd been walking home and seen two girls that looked suspiciously similar to the royal sisters with an older woman that she was now almost positive had been Gerda. One of the girls had clearly been injured badly-that was Elsa-and the other had seemed both upset and angry about whatever was going on-that was Anna. And the four men near the sled? Those were castle guards that hadn't been in uniform. At the time, Nikoleta had shrugged off her suspicions, figuring that she was probably wrong and that even she wasn't, it _definitely_ wasn't any of her business. None of the people she'd seen had even noticed her.

Now, she just felt herself hoping the young queen would be her friend, even though her mind told her that was completely inappropriate and stupid. She was a poor girl from a rickety, slightly dumpy house who'd gone to the queen for help as a last resort to protect her little brother. She had no right to want Elsa as a friend. It was just…she had a sickening feeling that if she told Elsa about _her_ nightmares, the older girl would understand only too well.

Nikoleta decided she wouldn't bother Elsa with that unless Elsa brought that sort of thing up first. She eyed the princess's nightstand, looking at the messy pile of books Anna had said she could look at if she wanted to. Nikoleta hadn't wanted to mess with the princess's things, but she didn't particularly want to risk falling asleep when she was supposed to be watching Elsa. She carefully picked up the top book and began slowly reading to herself, mentally labeling all the words she wanted to ask Elsa about later.

* * *

As Kai had predicted, Elsa stirred shortly before dinner, which made Nikoleta jump. "Niko…where's…Anna?" Elsa asked sleepily. She felt refreshed and much better, although she could also sense (with great annoyance) that she wasn't entirely in control of all her faculties yet. She _hated_ feeling so-called 'loopy'; it was the main reason she disliked and actively avoided taking any sort of medicine. That and medicine usually tasted nasty.

"She's, um…taking care of some work for you, Qu-Elsa," Nikoleta said awkwardly. Anna had specifically told her not to tell Elsa what she was doing, but Nikoleta didn't want to lie to Elsa, either. _Maybe she won't ask anymore?_

Elsa didn't ask anymore, but she scowled and instantly began trying to get up. "Niko, stop it! I gotta go take care of the work m'self!" Elsa protested.

"Like heck you do! Q-Elsa, you aren't even talking clearly yet. That sedative hasn't worn off completely. And Anna said to watch you and make sure you stayed in bed," Nikoleta replied, pushing the older girl back under the covers.

" _Don't_ say 'heck'," Elsa said, but she didn't try to get up again. A mischievous smile flitted across her face as she added, "I can override Anna's orders, you know," she added, clearly pleased with herself. She stayed lying down, but she pushed the covers away because she felt too hot. "D'you think it's hot in here?"

Nikoleta nodded truthfully (it _was_ a bit warm) and couldn't help giggling as Elsa flicked her hand and tiny snowflakes began falling all over the princess's room. She frowned as she watched the older girl's happy grin disappear. "Wh…what's wrong? Can I help?" Nikoleta asked quietly. The snowflakes grew fatter, but they remained floating down calmly. Elsa reached for Nikoleta's hand, missed, tried again, missed again; then Nikoleta just grabbed Elsa's hand and held it tightly. "El-Elsa, whatever's wrong, it's gonna be all right," she said quietly. Calling Elsa by her given name still felt awkward.

"I'm s-sorry you had t-to see me like that earlier…I _tried_ , Niko, I tried. Queen…not who y-you thought she was…just…damaged…can't fix me…I…I'm sorry. I'm sorry, Niko, really, really sorry." Elsa's hesitant voice cracked, and a single tear trickled down her cheek as she looked at Nikoleta, her blue eyes worried how the younger girl would judge her. _Elsa, shut up. Just shut up. Why did you say all that anyway?_ Elsa knew if she was completely aware, she wouldn't have said any of that, and that thought just frustrated her.

But Elsa needn't have worried; Nikoleta just smiled at her and gave her hand a reassuring squeeze. "You don't gotta apologize for that. And I'm not going to tell anybody. I promise. I like you fine. That stuff you refer to as 'damage' just makes you normal, that's all. I like the real you more than the public image you, if that makes any sense." Nikoleta decided she trusted Elsa, so she added, "You sort of remind me of myself. I don't know if you do or not, but I have really bad dreams a lot and they sometimes bother me during the day, too. They're bad memories. Seeing you get all upset earlier reminded me of that. And I've seen little teeny things about you most people would miss. _Something's_ hurting you; I know it is."

Elsa gave Nikoleta a sad smile. "Nikoleta Dahler, if bad memories bother you during the day, they aren't dreams. They're flashbacks," she said firmly. She blinked a few times and shook her head, trying to clear the remaining bits of cloudiness from her head. _I feel more clearheaded now, but I'm still not a hundred percent with it…_ "May I have a glass of water? Please?" Elsa asked hopefully. "I'm thirsty."

Nikoleta merely blinked at her for a moment before hopping to her feet. It sounded like a request one might make to an equal or that one didn't a hundred percent expect to be listened to, rather than an order from a royal to her employee. "Of course! I just, um, don't know where any cups or glasses or whatever are-I'm sorry."

"Anna prob'ly has one in her bathroom." Elsa unsuccessfully stifled a giggle as she added, "And it's prob'ly one big mess in there, so don't worry 'bout messing anything up." _Elsa, what is wrong with you? Stop talking so…stupidly. You sound half-asleep. Or drunk. Or…something._

* * *

A few minutes later, Elsa sat propped up against the pillows. The cool water had indeed helped clear her head, and while Elsa thought she would still probably fall over or walk into a wall or do something else stupid if she got up, she felt mostly herself again. She caught Nikoleta eyeing the books on Anna's nightstand and grinned at her. "Niko, you should know I am not one for small talk. You can look at a book if you want to. It won't be rude one bit," Elsa told her, knowing exactly why Nikoleta wasn't reading.

Nikoleta turned bright red. "I'm…I'm sorry, I just-I'm supposed to be making sure you're ok and reading means I'd be being rude because you're awake now, and-Qu-Elsa, what's so funny?"

"You. You sound like Anna. And if I'm honest, sometimes me, too. Rambling and tripping over words if you're embarrassed." Elsa paused, her giggles abruptly disappearing. "On a more serious note, I need to ask you something. What would you like me or whoever is with you to do for you if you get… _upset_?" she asked pointedly. "I think you know what I mean by that."

"Nothing?" Nikoleta just stared at Elsa like she had three heads. "Why would you or anyone else in this castle do anything if I felt like that? I'm supposed to be working for you and helping you, not the other way around."

Elsa shook her head. "No, no, no, that's not what I asked. I said, what did you _want_ us to do? Talk to you? Give you a hug? Give you a particular something to eat or drink? And I would 'do something if you felt like that' because even if I can't fix _me_ , I can still help someone else if I'm told what I should do. That's why. Besides," she looked down at her hands, "I know what it's like first-hand. You saw me…panic earlier today. I'm…I'm sorry I got like that. I could have hurt you and the others."

"But you didn't. Q-Elsa, I _really_ don't think you're going to hurt me or my brother or anyone else. You care about all of us too much to do that. I think…I think maybe you just got scared, if you'll pardon me saying that. And as far as helping me goes, I honestly don't know other than just don't hug me. A couple times Eliot tried to hug me and I ended up shouting at him because I thought he was our dad hurting me." Nikoleta gave Elsa sideways glance, unsure what the older girl's response would be.

"Okay, no hugs. I'll just talk to you then," Elsa replied instantly. Nikoleta's explanation hadn't fazed Elsa at all; it actually made rather good sense to her. And…selfishly, it made her feel better that she wasn't the only one who had 'episodes' or otherwise freaked out and got upset sometimes. Nikoleta was normal. She did not have magic like Elsa did.

Elsa's reaction gave Nikoleta the confidence to ask what she did next. "Can I ask you a kinda personal question? I don't blame you if you say you don't want to answer, though…" When Elsa nodded and just gave her a quizzical look, Nikoleta continued, "It's sort of something I've been wondering since I first met you up close. What…what happened to your leg?" Nikoleta bit her lip, instantly regretting asking her question. She shouldn't have asked Elsa that; it was obviously a sore spot for her seeing the way she'd been holding it when she had gotten all upset earlier that day.

Elsa awkwardly pulled her legs out from under the covers and nearly fell over in the process. She blinked and shook her head, trying to regain her train of thought. "It's a _long_ story…let's just suffice it to say several months ago I was injured badly and couldn't even walk. My legs were paralyzed and Dr. Raske said it was most likely permanent. Do you remember Kiara?" Nikoleta nodded, and Elsa went on, "Well, Kiara used to have electricity powers. She accidentally shocked me…that's how I was hurt in the first place. Anyways, Kiara didn't want her magic anymore; and since she wasn't born with it, Grand Pabbie-he's the troll elder or something, I don't know what to call it, and they live in the Valley of the Living Rock-was able to take Kiara's powers away, and doing that mostly healed my legs. Pabbie said my magic had automatically done its best to protect me. If a normal person had gotten shocked like that, she would have been dead," she finished matter-of-factly.

Nikoleta frowned. She had heard about the trolls, but she'd always thought they were just a legend. Then again, she wouldn't have thought magical powers were real either not all that long ago. "So if that old troll guy was able to heal you, how come you still have to wear a leg brace? Is it gonna get better eventually or something?"

"I don't know. Pabbie said there wasn't any way to know how much getting rid of Kiara's powers would help me, that I could have been left exactly the same or completely healed. He tried to heal me directly after that, but my magic wouldn't let him for whatever reason…it automatically blocks any other magic from directly helping or hurting me." Elsa paused before adding, "I'm trying to get it better-I replaced all the damaged nerves with my own magic-but it's still really weak and it just doesn't… _respond_ properly. Supposedly I should be able to walk on my own eventually, but I have a hard time believing that at the moment." Somehow she didn't feel self-conscious or anything talking about her weak leg to Nikoleta, probably because she knew Nikoleta would understand since she had a little brother who was a lot worse off than Elsa was. "I know I should be grateful, but sometimes I really hate having to drag my stupid leg around with that brace, even though I'm used to it now. I feel bad for thinking that way too, especially after I met Eliot. He made me feel a lot better about it, to be honest."

Nikoleta frowned again. She remembered what Anna had excitedly told her earlier before she'd left. _Pr-Anna thinks Elsa can participate in a dance class? She's not going to be able to do much of anything. And from what Anna was saying, it sounded like Elsa was_ never _good at dancing, even when she was little…_ Nikoleta had been looking forward to the class whenever Anna had arranged it, but now she felt bad. Elsa wouldn't be able to do it, and Eliot _definitely_ wouldn't be able to, although she was sure her little brother wouldn't be the least bit interested anyway. "Well, I think that's understandable," she said finally. "I mean, I'm sure it can't be comfortable, and it's gotta be annoying to suddenly not be able to do stuff you could do all your life. My brother was born like he is, and I know he _really_ doesn't like not being able to go outside and play ball and stuff, and he's never known anything different."

"It's not either of those things, mostly," Elsa replied quietly. "It's how everyone-or rather _mostly_ everyone-thinks of me or treats me differently because of it. How does having to wear a brace on her leg make a girl messed up or any less of a person?"

Nikoleta had a sick feeling that there was a lot Elsa wasn't saying. Part of her couldn't help thinking, _of course people treat her differently, she's the queen and she has magic_. But…the older girl's blue eyes were filled with tears. She looked genuinely confused and hurt.

"A bad leg doesn't make me dangerous…" Elsa's voice trailed off.

 _She doesn't understand. She thinks ONE mistake with her powers makes her 'messed up' and accepts that, but she doesn't understand why anyone would treat her differently for having a lame leg. That's exactly what it is._ "E-Elsa, I think the only reason you should be treated differently is because you're our queen. Like we should respect you and not be rude or refuse orders or whatever." Nikoleta thought for a minute before adding, "You _are_ different from most people's idea of normal, but I think that's a good thing. You made my brother happy because of your leg. You protect our country with your magic." She reached for Elsa's hands, being extra careful of Elsa's bandaged one.

"And a mistake, even more than one, even loads of them, doesn't make you 'messed up'. I don't care if you froze all of Arendelle or whatever, it doesn't matter. Anyone with a brain can see your heart's in the right place."

* * *

"Anna, this is ridiculous. What is Elsa going to say when you bring back all these kids?" Kristoff asked. Anna had been so excited to find him in the marketplace, and since she had told him her and Elsa's parents were gone, he didn't mind coming back to the castle for awhile.

Anna laughed. "Honestly? That crazy sister of mine will be happy!" Her laughter abruptly disappeared as she gave Kristoff her most serious look. "I don't know what Elsa's intending to do with all the kids. She can't adopt them all, and yet I know she would if she were able to. Kristoff, she was so happy when she told me about her idea originally. I just…I don't know. I don't want her setting herself up to be disappointed. Or risk her getting hurt again."

There were actually only three children with them, which hardly qualified as 'all these kids' in Anna's mind. To be exact, ten-year-old twins (one boy and one girl) she'd talked to at the school, and their three-year-old sister from one house that had made Anna feel sick.

Kristoff sighed, unsure what to say. He thought Elsa was crazy for trying whatever plan she had come up with. What was the queen, who wasn't much more than a child herself, going to do with three more rescues? Kristoff didn't know much about government or politics, but he knew very well that there was no way Elsa could keep taking people into the castle. Sooner or later there would be money problems or other nations backlashing her for it. "I think you had better smack some sense into your sister's head," Kristoff said finally.

"Well, she's not gonna listen." Anna dropped her voice to a whisper so only Kristoff would hear her as she added, "I think she just wants to make sure no other children are mistreated like she was." _Which is nice, but…what about Elsa herself? What_ is _she going to do with everyone? She already has Nikoleta and Eliot at the castle and she adopted Anikka._ Anna looked down at the three-year-old in her arms. She reminded Anna of how Elsa must have been as a three-year-old. Little Ina wasn't quite as pale as Elsa and her hair wasn't as light, but her blue eyes matched almost exactly.

Anna was almost positive Elsa would immediately want to keep Ina, if not the older twins too. She decided she hoped Elsa could get the twins' parents to straighten up so they could just return home.

 **A/N: I'll say right now Elsa is NOT keeping Ina and her older siblings. She's just going to help them and they are not staying at the castle.:)**

 **Next chapter coming soon:)**


	17. Chapter 17

**A/N: Thanks to everyone who's followed/favorited and/or is reading but not reviewing.:)**

 **Olivia O'Neil-Yep!:) Lol, just what Elsa needs-more little kids hanging about.:) (Although she likes them, so...anyways.)**

 **moohamquest-Well, Elsa meets the 3 children in this chapter:) As Nikoleta gets more comfortable around Elsa (and vice versa, really, for that matter), they'll be able to talk more. Elsa's already decided she trusts Nikoleta enough to talk to her, Nikoleta's still hesitant with the idea of being friends with the queen.:P**

 **Elsa Tomago-The only issue is that Elsa's emotions-directly-linked-with-her-powers abilities aren't exactly reliable; she's not a hundred percent sure how that works.:/ But don't worry; she'll have a chance to do that eventually.:) Spot on:)**

 **orang biasa-Thank you!:) Yep, Elsa isn't exactly planning out everything properly, even though she thinks she has, and she's trying to take on way too much at once. That issue will be addressed in this chapter.:) I agree-I doubt anyone in Elsa's position would actually try to do what she's doing, but...she's Elsa, not everyone else.:P And you're welcome! Thanks for understanding, lol. I'm a girl not that much younger than Elsa, so she and Anna are MUCH easier for me to write.:P**

 **On to the story!**

Elsa was helping Nikoleta learn new words from a book when Anna barged in and made her jump. Elsa's eyes went wide when she saw the children with her. Kristoff walked in slowly behind them and gave her an apologetic look. "Anna…?" she asked. _What did Anna do?!_ Elsa smiled when she saw Ina reaching towards her. She loved little kids so much. They didn't judge her or treat her funny. And while a tiny bit of her was still slightly nervous about hurting them, mostly she just wanted to take care of them, protect them, and give them hugs. This new little girl was no different. Elsa slowly stood up and then yelped in surprise when Ina ran right into her and knocked her over. "And what might your name be?" Elsa asked the three-year-old, happily holding her close.

"Ina." Ina looked up at Elsa and gave her a shy smile. "An' you named Essa."

" _El_ sa," Elsa corrected, although she didn't particularly care about the little girl mispronouncing her name.

"That baby is our sister," another voice said. "I'm ten, and I'm Maya."

"Max," said the other twin.

"I not a baby!" Ina protested.

Elsa gave the older kids a welcoming smile as she got to her feet and set Ina down; then frowned, wondering how the three kids were all siblings. The twins were obviously twins; Elsa couldn't see any obvious differences between them except for Maya's red curly hair being longer than her brother's and Max being a bit taller than Maya. Both of them had more freckles than Anna did, and Elsa thought her own little sister had lots of freckles. But little Ina didn't have any freckles at all, not even barely visible ones like Elsa's, and her blonde hair was completely straight. On a second glance, Elsa realized all three of them did have the same blue eyes. Mischievous ones that told Elsa the children were likely to be innocently causing trouble sometime soon.

"Can you have a snowball fight with us, Queen Elsa?" Max asked. "Princess Anna said we'd be safe here 'til you could figure out what to do with us and stuff."

"Yes, but it's nearly dinnertime and we are all going to eat first," Elsa told him firmly. She turned her attention to Nikoleta, Anna, and Kristoff. "Niko, you watch our new guests, please. Anna, you and Kristoff go find Eliot and Anikka. Niko said Kai was watching them. All of you have the children in the dining hall in fifteen minutes. I need to go talk to Gerda." Elsa knew Gerda wouldn't be expecting four extra people, so she was worried there wouldn't be enough dinner made for everyone. Gerda usually made a little more than was needed, but still.

* * *

"Why, Miss Elsa, what are you doing here?" Gerda asked when she saw Elsa peeking in the kitchen from the doorway. She took a batch of cookies out of the oven before coming over to Elsa. "Are you feeling better now? You certainly look better," she said quietly, looking Elsa right in the eyes.

Elsa nodded and gave Gerda a tiny smile. "Yes, thank you. I just…I don't know. I'm not sure what happened earlier," she replied softly. _I panicked, that's what happened. I don't even remember making that ice bubble; my powers did that on their own. I got scared for some reason…_

"I'll tell you what you _didn't_ do," Gerda said as she hugged Elsa close. "You didn't lose control at all even though you were irrationally scared. If you were thinking about what I think you were, Miss Elsa, then your magic actually automatically reacted in a helpful way without hurting you or even remotely risking hurting someone else."

Elsa just looked at Gerda in confusion, not entirely understanding. How could Gerda know what she had been thinking about or what had scared her? She sure hadn't told her.

"Miss Elsa, were you not feeling scared that someone would hurt you and take that brace away and leave you trapped somewhere again?" Gerda asked patiently. When Elsa nodded, Gerda went on, "Well, your magic made a completely unbreakable ice bubble around you, which is not only a logical reaction; it protects both you and whoever else is nearby. I don't know much about magic, but I would think that means your ice is more closely attuned with you and your mind and emotions and what to do now. It did something helpful that you would probably do consciously on purpose. Now what is you came down here for in the first place?"

"We have four extra people for dinner," Elsa replied, dropping her eyes to the floor. "I'm sorry-I just-"

"Miss Elsa, stop it! What in the world are you apologizing and looking down at your feet for?" Gerda scolded. Her voice softened as she added, "You need to act like the queen you are sometimes, even if it's merely telling your servant there will be more people at dinner than expected. Not start apologizing and not meeting your old servant's eyes. I know you are a little shy sometimes, and that's fine, but you're our queen all the same."

"But there won't be enough dinner for everyone, and I should have been able to say how many people there would be earlier," Elsa explained. She knew Gerda was right, but she hated putting on an act in front of someone she trusted. It wasn't like she'd been bawling or panicking or something. Those things she would happily hide if she knew how. What did it matter if Gerda saw her apologizing for something silly? It _didn't_.

As if reading Elsa's mind, Gerda just said, "You're right, I am not going to look down on you or whatever else if you act like that, but other people might. Even otherwise nice people might not want you in charge if they don't really know you. _I_ know you can do your job, but I've known you all your life. And not to mention, you need a good dose of self-confidence anyway. You always beat yourself up for absolutely no reason at all. Promise me you'll at least _try_ , Miss Elsa. Please."

"Okay." Elsa's almost immediate answer surprised Gerda, but Elsa knew Gerda was right and she could promise to try to do better. That didn't mean she would succeed, but she could _definitely_ try. "May I help with the dinner?" she asked hopefully.

Gerda frowned. "Who are your guests? If they are dignitaries or the like, I do not think it's a particularly good idea for them to see the queen helping with the cooking."

Elsa actually giggled at that. "It's Kristoff and three little kids. A three-year-old and a set of twins. They're ten. I don't think any of them would care," she replied truthfully.

"All right then. You can give the pot of chile one last stir and then get the bowls out, Miss Elsa," Gerda told her. She smiled reassuringly as she added, "I think we'll have enough food prepared. There just won't be enough chile and biscuits for seconds, that's all. There are, however, plenty of cookies. You needn't worry about these children going hungry."

* * *

After dinner, Kai pulled Elsa aside after she had sent everyone upstairs to the library. "Miss Elsa, do you have a few minutes?" Elsa nodded, and Kai took a deep breath before starting. "Miss Elsa, I'll just come straight out and say it: you cannot keep all of those children here. I know you're just trying to help people, but you're also asking for trouble. As soon as people find out you're harboring poor guests for free, there will be a stampede of sorts at the gate. And it makes you look too soft-hearted. People who don't like you will take advantage of it." He paused before adding, "Not to mention, who is going to take care of them? Miss Elsa, I do have other duties to attend to, as you well know. I can't babysit Anikka and Eliot every day, let alone the others. Gerda is already busy with cleaning and cooking-yes, I realize she has other servants' help and that she mostly just tends to you and your sister, but still. And goodness knows you can't take care of five young kids on your own. The whole thing is spiraling out of control, Miss Elsa. I am here to help you sort it out if need be."

Elsa bit her lip, understanding Kai's logic but unwilling to abandon her plan to help the children in her country. _I don't know what to do._ "What would you suggest, Kai?" she asked, hoping her father's longtime butler and advisor would have some helpful ideas that might work.

"Give those three children that Anna brought back this evening their own little contact crystal bracelet things like the ones you gave the Dahler kids. My hunch says their parents will probably shape up if you go over there yourself; and if not, the twins and Ina will still be fine because they can call for help," Kai told her. "Did you notice the difference between Max and Maya and Ina as compared to Nikoleta and Eliot?"

Elsa thought for a minute and then slowly nodded. _Max and Maya didn't seem particularly hurt or anything. And Ina's young enough that she's just a little quiet and shy, which is probably just her natural personality anyways. Their home situation isn't as bad as Nikoleta's and Eliot's was._ "Aside from a couple comments I heard the twins say about being left locked in their room and yelled at constantly, I wouldn't think anything was wrong. They're happy, like genuinely perfectly fine. Not hurt inside like Nikoleta and even Eliot, really. Oh, and Max said Ina didn't have the, um…same mother he and Maya did." She smiled, thinking of how much the twins reminded her of Anna. "They remind me of Anna."

"And that is why you need to take them right back home tomorrow before their parents come fussing at you for taking their kids. They'll be fine, Miss Elsa. Giving out contact crystals to children who needed them was your original idea anyway, and I think it's the best one. Perhaps focusing on making sure all children receive schooling would be a more feasible plan. Doing that will help flush out any child abuse or neglect, too." Kai paused before adding, "On another note altogether, I am giving you a heads up that your sister thinks that you are in a dance class she has arranged for this weekend on Saturday morning at eleven-thirty. I set it up for her, but-"

"But I can't dance. Believe me, I know quite well." Elsa sighed. _I already told Anna I'd try at least a little bit. I won't go back on my word, but after tomorrow I want nothing to do with it._ "I'm sorry for interrupting, Kai."

Kai gave her a reassuring smile. "That's quite all right, Miss Elsa. I just wanted to tell you now so you wouldn't be surprised with it."

"I let Anna try to teach me a bit earlier-before I got so ridiculously upset-and my stupid awkward legs got so tired I had to sit down for awhile," Elsa said softly. She looked down at her legs and made a face. What was she even supposed to wear to Anna's dance class? Her back was still sore, and there was _no way_ she was going to wear the flimsy bathing-suit-type-thing her magic had made in front of a stranger. Just being around Gerda and Anna like that made her self-conscious. She pushed her shoulders back and drew herself up to her full height. _I'll be fine. I promised Anna I would try it, not that I would keep doing it after the first class. I can deal with one unpleasant class. And I should be pretty much all healed by then, at least enough so it doesn't hurt anymore._

"The teacher is a nice woman who recently moved here across Lake Erie from the United Sates," Kai told her after a moment. "She seems to be happy here, but her Norwegian is very rough. I doubt your friend Nikoleta knows English-or if she does, not much-so I thought perhaps you could interpret things or something. Then you can still 'participate' in the class even if actually dancing doesn't work out very well, Miss Elsa."

Elsa considered that for a minute and then frowned. "Kai, I just thought of something. Does Arendelle need more border patrol on our borders? We really don't have much knowledge of the United States in general. What if their government sent spies into Arendelle to investigate? Or just…bad people in general? I still remember that ridiculous rigmarole last summer when Anna and I ran into some…let's just say undesirables…in their capital. If those sort of gang types are in their own capital, how many must there be elsewhere? And they have far better technology than we do. I have no idea what sort of things their modern technology can make that could equal my magic if it came down to a fight." _Shut up, Elsa. You're ridiculous. Why would a huge country like the U.S. want anything to do with your country? Arendelle is tiny and you know it._

Something was niggling at her in her mind and she did _not_ like it. For one thing, why would the lady Kai and Anna had hired for a dance teacher move to Arendelle in the first place? Somehow she was absolutely sure it wasn't just a random move. She believed Kai when he said the woman was nice, but that didn't explain things enough to her. That didn't explain why the American lady had chosen to move to Arendelle, of all places. Elsa felt proud of her native country, but it was still tiny and unknown…at least that was what she told herself.

 _We're not unknown any longer. Because of me._

 _And that means we're not safe._

Elsa knew she was living in a 'modern world', but she also knew her governmental and political knowledge was that of another time. Who knew if international laws and other protocol and the like were even still the same as what she had been so carefully prepared for her entire life? She needed current knowledge of such things, and fast.

She hadn't liked being in the big country to the south much.

 _We're not safe._

She remembered the bit of the big city she'd seen right after Anna and Kiara had gotten her out of that villain's secret hideout. Yes, she had been weak and couldn't walk, but she clearly remembered how the air had smelled and the way the sky looked…filthy. She would not let that happen to _her_ country, even if that meant no modern technology. Those modern technology things could be good things, Elsa was sure, but she would have to go about it differently.

"Miss Elsa, are you all right?" Kai asked in concern. "You don't look panicked, but you're staring off into space…"

Elsa took a deep breath and turned a determined face at Kai. "I'm fine. I was just thinking. I need more information about the current goings-on in other countries. I've been stupid…I briefly thought of this before, but I need to get Arendelle into the world circuit before it happens without our control. Kai, I _love_ my country; I'd die protecting it if necessary. But…something's wrong. I don't know what it is, but I don't like it. It's like I can feel it. Not literally, but…that doesn't make sense, does it?"

Kai's expression remained concerned. "It does make sense," he said slowly. He thought carefully before continuing, "Miss Elsa, I care about you a great deal. Not just as our country's queen, but as a daughter, even though you obviously aren't any such thing. If you aren't careful, you are going to get in over your head. And those things are why I am going to tell you this: simply put, you're young. A young girl with a great deal of power, both the literal sort and politically. Not just that, you're sensitive and you let yourself be hurt easily. That's exactly the sort of person for people to want to take advantage of."

"You…you don't think I can handle my job?" Elsa asked softly. _Of course you can't, Elsa,_ a nasty thought informed her. _You mess things up._

 _Shut up. I will not either mess things up. I have help._

"That isn't what I said. I said you are the sort of person people will want to take advantage of," Kai corrected. "Miss Elsa, I don't mean to be disrespectful or rude, but there is also the fact that you look even younger than your age, and, bluntly put, you can't walk properly. Before you say anything, no, those things shouldn't matter, but people can be prejudiced. You should find what people perceive to be the negative things about you and use them to your advantage."

Kai noticed that Elsa looked like she was trying her best not to cry, and he gently gave her a hug. "It's all right to be upset, Miss Elsa. I know what I just told you probably wasn't nice to hear," he said quietly.

Elsa shook her head firmly and wiped her eyes. "No, I'm just being silly. I know you're right. You told me hard facts, and that's what I need. I don't think anyone but you and Gerda are ever going to tell me things I don't want to hear _and_ actually want to help me. Papa would tell me the truth, but he's sometimes…just mean. You and Gerda are still kind even when you're telling me not-nice things, if that makes any sense." She grinned a second later. "I think I know one advantage I have already as far as investigating the outside world goes. As long as no one recognizes me, I think even criminal types would probably tell a pale innocent-looking girl who can't walk properly important information. I know I don't look very threatening."

"You'd need a disguise, that's all. And you wouldn't be able to use your magic, obviously, so you would also need a companion with you for protection purposes, just in case. He or she would also need to be in disguise. Although I think the safest thing would be to send someone else to scout around and get some general knowledge." Kai thought a moment more before adding, "Someone fluent in English without an accent. You're completely fluent, but you do have a slight accent. That wouldn't matter, but…"

"But there isn't anyone else who looks the least bit like me, so I'd immediately be found out. Anna doesn't have an accent, though. I don't want her going to an unknown place by herself anyways, though…maybe the new dance teacher would talk to me if she's as nice as you said she was," Elsa suggested finally. "I'd really like to investigate myself, to be honest." Privately she hated the idea of going to an unfamiliar place knowing she wouldn't be able to use her magic without revealing herself. That was really the only thing she had that could keep her safe. After Gerda had pointed out that she could just make an ice bubble to protect herself if need be, she felt far more comfortable with the idea of defending herself if she needed to. _Ironic that now that I think I could promise Anna that I'd defend myself if need be, I won't be able to if I go through with this…_

"Miss Elsa, we can't risk your safety without just cause," Kai said firmly. "This is not just cause. This is pure speculation. Probably correct speculation, but speculation all the same."

Elsa considered that for a moment. She knew Kai was right, but the only people she was willing to trust with something like this were the same two people she needed here. Kai and Gerda. Both Gerda and Kai could speak English, but Gerda had a far worse accent than Elsa's own, and Kai…well, she wasn't sure. _She_ thought Kai was fluent enough to 'pass', but she really wasn't entirely sure. "Could I pass as just a girl you adopted or something? That could explain my accent if need be, and then I could just avoid talking in the first place," she suggested hesitantly. _Elsa, why did you say that? You're twenty-one years old for goodness sakes. Not eleven. No one would want you anyway._ "I'm sorry, I know that's stupid. Even if it would work, I'm sure…."

Kai wanted to just hold Elsa close and tell her that would be perfectly fine. Something in Elsa's eyes told him her idea hadn't entirely come out of nowhere; it was probably something that had crossed her mind when she was little. A little girl's desperate wish that the two adults that actually cared about her could be her parents. "Yes, Miss Elsa, I'm very sure you would pass, actually," Kai replied slowly. "The trouble is that we have no papers to prove it should we run into problems. The other issue is that we're still running the risk of you being recognized."

"Not if we can get said papers. And me…well, most people outside Arendelle don't know about my leg, so that could actually help hide me rather than identify me. I know I'm not hurt in that moving picture thing-I've heard multiple times it ends just after the Great Thaw. _That's_ the picture everyone has of me-whatever's in that. I have United States money-a big roll of it that Kiara gave me all those months ago." Elsa paused and smiled ruefully. "And I'll fix my hair like I let Anna do last Christmas because I _know_ I look younger that way, and I'll find some weird outfit from the United States or something."

"What are we going to do there if this works, Miss Elsa?" Kai asked.

"Go to a large bookstore, buy the books with the information we need, and just walk around a city a bit and come back," Elsa responded instantly. "If we're careful-and a bit lucky-we shouldn't have anyone ask questions at all."

"And after that?" Kai wanted to make sure Elsa already had a clear idea in her head of exactly what she wanted to do to ensure she wasn't jumping headlong into the whole thing like she seemed to be doing with trying to help the children. This was another thing about Elsa that was much like her little sister. When Elsa got excited about something or wanted to 'fix' something, she would throw herself into it and potentially get in over her head. Sure, Elsa might think more logically than Anna, but that was not going to save her every time.

"We wait."

"For what, may I ask?"

"Whatever trouble is brewing, if any. We'll have the information needed and we won't be taken advantage of."

* * *

"Essa, you nice," Ina informed Elsa after the promised snowball fight. She curled up closer in Elsa's arms, more than a little puzzled as to why she didn't feel all shivery sitting on Elsa's lap in a pile of snow. Ina recognized that Elsa _was_ physically cool compared to others, but she wasn't an ice cube.

Elsa noticed Anikka standing a couple feet away from her with her hands on her hips and a worried expression on her face, and easily recognized what was wrong. _Anikka's worried I like Ina more than I like her._ "Come here, Anikka. There's plenty of room for you too," she assured the five-year-old.

Anikka eagerly threw herself into Elsa's waiting arms; then scowled and poked Ina hard. "You move. Elsa is _my_ mommy, not yours. _Don't_ steal her," she ordered in the most authoritative voice a five-year-old could.

Ina began crying but instantly whipped out a tiny hand and smacked the older child as hard as she could before Elsa could react.

Elsa was keenly aware that she had six other pairs of eyes trained on her, wondering what she would do. _Elsa, just stay calm. They're five and three; you can take care of this._ "Anikka, you are being mean to our guests. Ina, we do not hit each other," she said firmly. She thought for a moment before adding, "If you could please apologize, I have something each of you might like since we're all a bit hot and sweaty from the snowball fight."

"Sorry, Essa."

"Sorry, Elsa."

"Not to me, you sillies! Each other!" Elsa tried her best not to giggle, but it was hard. She smiled once the two little girls had told each other sorry, but she knew they still weren't exactly happy with each other.

* * *

Once everyone was settled down again, Elsa struggled to her feet and just said, "I'll be right back. Kristoff, Anna, and Nikoleta are in charge." She turned to Anikka and gave her a reassuring smile. "Anikka, you come with me. You can help me carry the surprise back upstairs." Elsa really did not need any help, but she thought letting Anikka come with her might make her realize she didn't need to be worried about Ina 'stealing' Elsa from her.

Anikka slipped her hand into Elsa's good one and happily went with her. "What's the s'prise?"

"Something you'll like," Elsa told her cryptically.

"Can I have a piggyback ride?"

Elsa made a face. "It's ' _may_ I', and no, not tonight. I can't. My back isn't healed yet. I even had to be extra careful while we had our snowball fight, remember? You can the second Gerda says it's all better and it doesn't need to be bandaged anymore, though," Elsa offered. "Here, I have something better anyways." She pulled her hand away from Anikka's and flicked her wrist. A second later, there was a sparkling little wagon made of ice standing in the hallway in front of them. "I'll pull you. Your chariot awaits," Elsa teased. "You have to share it, though, okay?"

Anikka seemed delighted with the wagon, even if she did have to share it, and she plopped herself into it and grinned. "Thanks you, Elsa!"

A few minutes later, the two girls arrived back to the library with a bag of sugar and a spoon. "I'm not completely sure this will work, but it should be tasty at least," Elsa explained to everyone. "We can make sweet sugar snow and play a game." She quickly made some fairly good-sized ice cones for everyone and then filled them with snow and stirred in the sugar. "Now those cones will melt. The point is to finish your treat before that happens. Whoever finishes first wins. And I won't participate since my hand is cooler and it won't melt as quickly."

"I think it's still fair if Elsa plays too. She won't really have an unfair advantage since she's only holding hers with one hand," Anna said quickly, not wanting her sister to be left out of the very game she had made up for everyone else. When she saw how Elsa's eyes lit up, she knew she had said the right thing. _Elsa wasn't upset at the idea of being left out, but the idea of being included made her happy._

But despite Anna's offer, Elsa still shook her head. "Thank you very, very much, Anna, but I still don't think it's fair. It's fine." She plopped herself down on the sofa before adding, "But thank you for offering."

"She can just start like two minutes after the rest of us," Kristoff told the group. "That sound good? These are all going to melt before _anyone_ eats them if we keep discussing this."

Everyone nodded, including Elsa, who thought that sounded more fair to everyone.

* * *

Less than five minutes and a lot of giggling later, Elsa still won their game, quickly followed by ten-year-old Max and then Anna. "You're fun, Queen Elsa!" Max informed her. He glanced at Eliot and then the wagon Elsa had made for Anikka. "May I borrow your wagon, Anikka?"

Anikka nodded, but she didn't look entirely thrilled with the idea. Still, she had promised she would share her wagon, so…

Max jumped to his feet and yanked one of Maya's red curls. "Come on, you dork! I got an idea. We'll stay in the hallway. Eliot, wanna come? I'll pull you down the hall in the wagon. Really fast!" Max grinned when the younger boy nodded. He turned to Anikka and Ina. "You two can come too, even if you're babies." Then he bowed awkwardly at Elsa and gave her a very quick hug before blurting, "Thanks for having us over, Queen Elsa. You're a really really good friend."

Elsa held in her giggles until all five of the younger kids had left the library. She wished Kiara were still there; her Southern Isles friend would have loved their unplanned sleepover-ish party. Elsa realized she had more _friends_ with her tonight than she had ever had in her life. She thought of what Nikoleta must have been dealing with at her old house for who knew how long, and she suddenly felt like an idiot. What was _wrong_ with her?! Why did she still feel so broken and messed up inside so much of the time? At least she had had a nice place to live growing up. And just… _I don't understand. What's wrong with me?_

The next thing Elsa knew, she felt someone just hugging her close and gently wiping her tears away. Her first thought was that it was Anna, but then she heard a different voice that she easily recognized.

"Q-Elsa, it's ok. Really. Please don't cry," Nikoleta begged. She looked on the verge of crying herself. She remembered everything Elsa had told her that afternoon before dinner…and what Elsa had told Anna right after she'd panicked so badly. _'I didn't wanna throw Elsa away and kill her. Promised Anna I wouldn' do that.'_ Nikoleta noticed the faint pink scar on Elsa's left wrist and bit her lip. _That could be from anything. It doesn't mean she ever…hurt herself and didn't succeed._ "El…Elsa, what's that from?" she blurted, pointing at the older girl's wrist.

Anna glared at Nikoleta as Elsa's countenance crumpled further and she hid her wrist, holding it as best she could with her bandaged hand. "Why'd you ask her that?!" Anna demanded, though she knew Nikoleta hadn't meant any harm. She gently took Elsa's bandaged right hand so Elsa wouldn't hurt it any further and just said, "You're all right, Elsa. You're safe. We don't care. Well, I mean, we _care_ , but it doesn't matter. Well, it matters, but…ugh, Elsa, you know what I mean. Just tell your friend. I think she sort of knows already."

Elsa had a trace of a smile on her face at Anna's attempts to clarify what she'd meant. _Thank you, Anna. You always help._ She hesitantly let her left hand drop to her lap, exposing her wrist again. "It's from a suicide attempt," she said in a quiet, flat voice. "Anna realized what I was doing and she told Gerda. Gerda rescued me before I…finished." _Elsa, just…calm down. Kristoff, Nikoleta, and Anna aren't going to laugh at you or something. You know they won't._

"H-how old were you?" Nikoleta asked; then immediately wished she hadn't.

"Eighteen." Elsa gave Nikoleta a sad smile. "Just a few months older than you are now. May I just say if you ever feel like trying that, _don't_. It won't fix anything." She paused for a minute; then just said, "Could we please change the subject?"

 **A/N: Yes, Elsa is planning to visit the U.S. sometime soon. She just needs to plan EVERYTHING out ahead of time, though...she knows she needs some information, but she needs to figure out exactly how to get it.:)**

 **Next chapter coming soon!**


	18. Chapter 18

**A/N: Thanks to everyone who's followed/favorited and/or is reading but not reviewing:)**

 **Olivia O'Neil-We'll find out more about the teacher in the chapter after this one.:) Without giving spoilers, I'll just say nothing will go _too_ horribly wrong but obviously everything won't go smoothly, either, if that makes any sense.**

 **Elsa Tomago-Wait and see!:) Let's put it this way...there's more to the teacher than meets the eye, but she's not a creep.:P Well, Elsa won't be going alone, and Anna will understand why Elsa is doing what she's doing, even if she doesn't like it.**

 **HanLeiaSolo-Hey sis. I told you what's going on in the story face-to-face, so I see no point in repeating myself here. :)**

 **orang biasa-Thank you:) Kai is trying to make sure Elsa knows what's what...he helped her father, so he does know what he's talking about.:) I'd say no too, but Elsa feels like she should say yes since it's something Anna _really really_ wants to do with her.:/ And yes, I agree, Anna can be rather stubborn...but so can Elsa if she so chooses.:P Lol, good point.:) It's modern day, but Arendelle still only has canon technology. Elsa has limited knowledge of the modern world; hence why she's investigating.:) (Yes, I will explain WHY Arendelle is so behind the times eventually:P) Don't apologize:)**

 **On to the story!:)**

Later that night, everyone else in the library was still asleep when Elsa jerked awake to muffled crying somewhere near her. After making sure it wasn't Anikka, Elsa crawled out from under her blanket, leaving Anikka curled up beneath it. She crawled over to Nikoleta and then lit a single candle, figuring that would make less light than her magic-glow-light-things would. "Niko? Niko, it's just me," Elsa whispered. "Are you okay?"

Nikoleta shook her head and sat up, tears streaking her cheeks. She was honestly surprised she hadn't woken someone up sooner; she'd been…not all right for awhile already. "Did…did I w-wake everyone up?" she asked worriedly. "I'm sorry, E-Elsa, just go back to sleep…"

"No, just me." Elsa reached to give Nikoleta a hug, but then remembered that Nikoleta had said specifically not to do that if she was upset, and just pulled her knees to her chest instead. "Do you honestly want me to go away?"

"No," Nikoleta replied honestly. "I want me and you and everyone else who gets upset like this to be all better."

Elsa's pale face fell at that statement. _I don't even know if that's possible._ "Well, maybe we can at least _sort of_ get better," she said finally. She gave Nikoleta a lopsided smile and added, "D'you want to just ask each other questions 'til you can fall back asleep?"

Nikoleta nodded and smiled a little as she watched Elsa crawl under the piano and then wave her over. This Elsa was not the terrified Elsa she'd seen, or the mischievous playful Elsa that had made up the snow sugar eating game. Nor was it the dignified queen Elsa. This Elsa was just trying her best to make a friend feel better. _A friend? Me?_ Nikoleta scrambled under the piano twice as fast as Elsa had and wrapped herself up in her own blanket.

"You ask first," Elsa said, flopping down on her tummy; then immediately biting back a yelp when her bad foot hit one of the piano legs hard. "Ow," she muttered, sitting back up and rubbing her foot before settling herself back on her tummy, this time much more carefully. She grinned at her friend-Nikoleta was her friend, right? yes, she was, and that made Elsa happy-and quipped, "And yes, weird personal questions are allowed, at least if you want to ask them, anyways. I don't usually trust people this quickly, but…I don't know. You seem trustworthy."

"That means a lot," Nikoleta said truthfully. "Ok, um…does your bad leg hurt?" That was the first thing that popped into Nikoleta's head.

"Only when I hit it against piano legs," Elsa deadpanned, her blue eyes twinkling. "In all seriousness, no. I still have feeling in it, so it does hurt if I scrape it or whatever, though. The only time it hurts otherwise is if I get really upset like you saw before. My magic is linked with my emotions, so it reacts and makes it hurt. Okay, my turn. If you had to pick a type of magic and be stuck with it your whole life, what would you have?"

Nikoleta thought for a long time before answering. _She didn't say 'if you could pick'. She said 'if you_ had to _pick and be stuck with it your whole life'. Elsa, what did your parents do to you that made you think being special is bad?_ "Something that would let me fly. Maybe air, if there's such a thing. Do you play the piano or sing?"

Elsa nodded. "I don't think I'm very good at either, but Anna thinks I am. I don't like singing much unless I'm by myself, though. Then I love it." She grinned mischievously as she asked her next question. "If I suggested we climb up on the roof right this second, what would you say?"

"I'd say you were crazy!" Nikoleta tilted her head and just stared at Elsa, realizing the older girl hadn't just been asking a rhetorical question; she was actually asking if Nikoleta wanted to climb up on the castle roof with her. "Elsa, you're hurt. You can't hold on with both hands and I know your back is still a bit sore. And it's dark. I _really_ don't think that's a good idea, although I'll come out there with you if you want me to."

Elsa's mischievous expression disappeared. "Will you when I'm better?" she asked in a small voice. _Elsa, be quiet. You know it doesn't have anything to do with your weak leg, you idiot._

"Sure! It doesn't have anything to do with your leg at all-I'm sure it'd make climbing harder, but I think you still could if you were extra careful," Nikoleta told her honestly. She yawned. "Do you mind if we go back to sleep now? Thank you so much for helping me."

"You're quite welcome. I just did what any…f-friend would do." Elsa couldn't help stumbling over the word 'friend' even though deep inside, she knew Nikoleta didn't think badly of her or not want her as a friend. _You're the first friend near my age I've ever had besides Anna._

Nikoleta just watched Elsa crawl back over to her own blanket dragging her bad leg behind her and then curled back up under her own once she saw her friend was settled again. "I'm glad you're my friend, Elsa," she said softly a minute later.

A very sleepy "Me too," replied back.

* * *

When Elsa woke up the next morning, only Max and Maya and Eliot were awake. "Did you sleep all right?" she asked the kids, hoping they would say yes. All three kids nodded, and she smiled as she reached for her brace under the coffee table where she'd left it the night before. Almost instantly her smile faded. _Okay, Elsa, don't be ridiculous. Maybe you or someone else accidentally kicked it during the night._ But a quick look told her it just plain wasn't there. It was gone. "Have any of you seen my brace?" she asked finally, hoping the children had some idea of where it went.

Eliot said nothing, and Max and Maya both said no.

The mischievous look in the twins' eyes immediately told Elsa what had happened, and she wasn't sure whether to be mad or worried or upset or relieved. Max and Maya didn't want to hurt her; they probably just thought hiding it was funny so she or someone else would have to go searching for it. "I know you hid it. Where did you put it?" Elsa asked firmly.

Max just stared at her, but Maya started giggling. "I told you Queen Elsa would figure it out instantly!" she crowed.

Eliot sank lower into the sofa where he was sitting next to Max. He could tell Elsa was a bit upset, although she was mostly hiding it. She was probably embarrassed on top of being upset, too, and he knew Elsa couldn't walk without wearing her brace. "Give it…'ack," he mumbled. "Not…nice j-joke. Mean." The twins had convinced Eliot not to tell Elsa where it was, but he hadn't said he wouldn't tell on them, either.

"Aw, Queen Elsa won't care. She played with all of us last night-she even had a snowball fight with us!" Max pointed out.

"Sh-she d…does too…ca…care!" Eliot pointed at Elsa. "Not…a…'appy face. Sad."

Maya nudged her brother once she realized Elsa definitely wasn't laughing. She wasn't even smiling; she looked almost…hurt. Maybe even the slightest bit mad. "Max, give it back. Eliot's right. The prank's over. Besides, you have to listen-I'm nine and a half minutes older than you," she announced.

Max stuck out his tongue, but once he realized Elsa did indeed not think this was funny, he quickly gave Elsa's brace back to her. "I'm sorry, Queen Elsa. I just wanted to play a joke. I thought it'd be funny, but it wasn't." He felt horrible when he noticed how Elsa's eyes were bright with unshed tears. She suddenly seemed more like a girl not much older than him than the fun-loving but still mature not-quite-grown-up Elsa from the evening before. "I'm _really_ sorry," he apologized again, not quite sure what else to say.

"It's okay-I forgive you. Just…please don't do it again," Elsa answered after a moment. She knew the twins hadn't meant any harm, but it had still made her a bit upset. _Elsa, just stop it. You_ know _they weren't trying to hurt you. You_ know _that._

"Are you gonna tell our parents, Queen Elsa?" Max asked, suddenly looking more than a little worried. "I promise we won't play any more jokes on you."

"No. Why would I do that? You promised you won't do it again, and I believe you." Elsa smiled a bit before adding, "I actually have something nice for you and Maya and Ina. Contact crystals so you can call me if you need help. I'm taking all three of you home tomorrow, and I want you to have a way to get help if need be."

* * *

A FEW DAYS LATER…

"Elsa, I'm really sorry," Nikoleta apologized. She and Eliot and Anikka and Elsa had decided to go swimming Saturday morning before Anna's planned dance lesson thing.

Anna and Kristoff were giving Sven a bath in the castle courtyard instead, and Elsa's ice dragon Linnae was calmly watching but not getting anywhere near them. Linnae had no interest in receiving a bath, and she had no need of one anyway.

Back by the pool, Elsa just blinked at her friend as she took her brace off her leg. "What for?" _Actually, I think I know exactly what Niko is talking about…_ The evening before, Gerda had checked Elsa's back and said that while it was pretty much completely better, there was a faint white line across it that Gerda wasn't sure would fade entirely. Elsa didn't really care; she was so pale that a 'faint white line' would blend right in with the rest of her skin. The only thing that confused her was why the mark on her back had turned white so quickly and the scar on her wrist from when she was eighteen remained pink. A barely visible pink, but pink all the same. _Probably 'cause I cut my wrist really deep or something? I don't know._

"You got hurt protecting me and my brother, and you shouldn't have felt like you had to do that," Nikoleta explained.

"I was doing my job, Niko. What I was supposed to be doing, protecting people that needed help." Elsa's expression turned mischievous as she shakily stood up. "Are you a good swimmer?" she asked, her blue eyes twinkling.

Before Nikoleta could answer, Elsa lost her balance and tumbled right into the pool, pulling Nikoleta in along with her. Luckily Nikoleta could indeed swim well; that was one thing her father had done right. He'd taken her to a more secluded part of the fjord and dumped her in when she was little, saying everyone needed to know how to swim. Now she popped back to the surface, sputtering water while Anikka and Eliot laughed and laughed. Elsa popped up beside her, first looking worried and then just stifling giggles once she knew her friend was okay.

Anikka sat on the steps in the shallow end, not understanding why Eliot would not come in the water. Even if he didn't know how to swim, he could still sit on the steps and still be in the water. Anikka herself wasn't a very good swimmer. And it wasn't hot, but the air was warm and Anikka thought if she stayed outside long enough without going swimming, she'd feel way too hot. "Eliot, come in," Anikka said in her most grown-up voice.

Eliot shook his head. He was terrified he would just sink like a rock the second he put one inch of him in the water.

Elsa's childish giggles disappeared when she noticed that Eliot wasn't just not swimming or getting in the pool; he looked scared. "It's safe, Eliot, I promise. Niko or I can teach you how to swim," she tried to reassure the little boy.

"Not…work…'ight," Eliot mumbled, staring at his legs. "Make…me…s-sink."

"One of mine doesn't work right, either. Water helps us float, not push us under. It won't matter," Elsa said quietly. "Take your braces off. Swimming'll be easier that way." She pulled herself out of the pool and just sat on the edge next to Eliot, keeping her legs dangling in the water. "Can you sit like this, Eliot? No actual swimming if you don't want to." Elsa gave Eliot a lopsided smile once he had followed her instructions. "See, this isn't so bad, is it?"

Eliot shook his head. He still looked a little nervous, but the terror was gone. Elsa and Nikoleta wouldn't let anything happen to him. And he was _not_ going to let five-year-old Anikka have something to tease him about if he could help it.

"Would you like to go sit on the steps now, in the shallow water?" Elsa asked. Her voice remained gentle; the teasing mischievousness had completely disappeared. Somehow helping Eliot made Elsa herself feel better inside, and she wasn't sure why.

Eliot nodded but didn't say anything.

Elsa smiled and began scooting around the edge of the pool to the steps. "See, you can scoot over here like a crab. Is that okay?" She grinned as Eliot began doing the same thing. He had almost reached the steps when he somehow fell in the water, not having as much coordination as Elsa did. Elsa immediately caught him, but not until after he'd gone completely underwater. "I'm sorry, Eliot, I'm sorry, I thought it'd-"

"It's…ok." Eliot clutched his arms around Elsa's neck as tightly as he could. He still felt frightened that the same thing would happen again, but he knew that hadn't been because Elsa wasn't watching him. It had been because Elsa had been completely sure he could do something by himself and he hadn't been able to-he'd lost his balance. This was one of the very few times in his life that someone _over_ estimated him, and that actually felt good, even if his nose still burned from breathing in water.

Nikoleta didn't interfere; she just continued holding Anikka's hands so the little girl could kick herself around without dunking her face underwater. _Elsa is so good with my little brother. I don't know if that's because she has something 'messed up' physically too or if she's just good with little kids…probably both._

Elsa gently loosened Eliot's arms from around her neck and guided his hands to the pool's edge by the steps. When she noticed that the lowest step would make the water up to about Eliot's shoulders if he were standing, she immediately had an idea. "Eliot, put your feet down like you're standing up," she instructed.

Eliot just stared at her. "Can't."

"Well, try anyway," she retorted instantly, although she was smiling. "I'm right here. I won't let you go under again, I promise." Elsa nearly squealed in excitement when her idea worked. The water supported Eliot's legs enough that he could sort of stand up. Not completely, but sort of.

"Niko, 'ook at…me!" Eliot called to his big sister. "I…s-standin'! E-Elsa sh-showed…'e…how!"

Nikoleta squealed and dragged Anikka along after her. She squeezed her little brother close and then Elsa too. "Elsa, what'd you do? Did you heal my brother somehow? What'd you tell him?" she asked excitedly.

Elsa shook her head. "I didn't do anything. I just know the water helps me, so I thought it would help Eliot, too. Niko, he's not healed, not in the least. I just showed him something he could do he didn't know he could, that's all," she said softly. Elsa turned when she felt a light tug on her arm. "What is it, Eliot?"

"Th-thank…'ou. You…'ought I…could…do…'ometh-thing. Not…" Eliot struggled to express what he wanted Elsa to know. That she had actually believed he could do something and not treated like he was helpless or useless or something else terrible. "Not…y-yucky…worm," he finished finally.

Elsa looked puzzled for a second, but then she understood. She understood only too well. And that understanding made her cry. "I know what that's like," she whispered. _I'm sorry, Eliot. I wish you didn't. There's nothing wrong with you. You're not dangerous and you don't even run the risk of being so._ Elsa suddenly felt a wave of panic, and she scrambled out of the pool as fast as she could, hitting her head on the railing as she did so. "Ow!"

* * *

Nikoleta quickly plopped the two young kids on the pool's edge and ordered them to stay out of the water; then turned her attention to her friend. Elsa was sitting just outside the water, clutching her knees to her chest and hiding her face. If Nikoleta hadn't known better, she would have thought the older girl was shivering, but she knew that wasn't the case. She put her arms around Elsa and just hugged her tightly. "I know what's hurting you this time, Elsa," she said quietly. "And it's all right. You haven't got to cry."

"It _hurts_ ," Elsa heard herself say. "It…it still hurts." _Nikoleta shouldn't be trying to help you, Elsa. You're supposed to be helping her._

"I know, Elsa, I know," Nikoleta whispered. She didn't know what else to say, so she just continued giving Elsa a hug. Maybe just being with her would help her feel better and calm down.

"Why won't it stop hurting?" Elsa asked plaintively.

Nikoleta's expression darkened a hundred times over as her own eyes burned with tears and she let her friend cry into her shoulder. "Because we're human and we have emotions, and other humans can be horribly unfair and mean," she spat. Nikoleta could feel Elsa beginning to calm down, but her body still shook with each breath. "Elsa, may I please check your head now? You banged it on the railing, and I wanna make sure you're ok."

Elsa nodded and gave Nikoleta a small smile. "I'm sorry I got like that again." She put her hand to her forehead and winced at the slight pressure. "I think it's just a little tender. I end up hitting myself on things way too often, I think. I'm fine."

Nikoleta sat back on her heels. "What Eliot told you isn't a bad thing. He's fine now, and so are you," she said slowly, trying to figure out exactly how to explain herself. "Elsa…you told me where that was from the other day," Nikoleta continued, pointing at her friend's left wrist. "And I saw you hurting yourself the very first time I saw you, although I know it wasn't with the same intention. I've got something to show you." Nikoleta made sure the little kids weren't paying attention; then scrunched her eyes shut and took a deep breath before showing Elsa her tummy. Pink and white lines littered her skin, some quite a bit older than others. "Elsa, nobody did that to me," she said quietly, hoping she wouldn't have to explain further to make Elsa understand. "I thought I was the only one 'til I saw you up close that first time. When Olaf took me to your room through those tunnel thingies. When I saw what you were doing, I promised myself I wouldn't do it anymore. You looked so sad. I guess I just…I don't know. I slipped once, but…since I've been here, since you let Eliot and me stay here…you…you help. A lot. I feel _better_. Even _good_ a lot of the time."

"I…I help?" Elsa glanced at Eliot and Anikka, but they weren't paying the older girls any mind at all; they were playing rock-paper-scissors. She understood exactly what Nikoleta meant, though. Knowing that she hadn't been the only one who had reacted that way _did_ make her feel better. It forced her to realize that she wasn't crazy or stupid, just…hurt. "Did you ever…attempt anything?" Elsa asked hesitantly.

"No, but I sure as heck wanted to more than once," Nikoleta told her honestly. "I did _that_ instead," she said, gesturing at the marks on her tummy. "Because a stomach could be easily covered up and you could pretend you were fine even if you weren't."

 _Conceal, don't feel,_ Elsa couldn't help thinking. That was exactly what her friend was saying, just not with those exact words. She jumped when Nikoleta just said, "Yeah, exactly." " 'Yeah, exactly' what?" Elsa asked, confused.

"You said 'conceal, don't feel'. That's exactly…right. The right explanation, if that makes any sense."

"I can't decide if knowing you've felt like that too makes me feel better or worse," Elsa commented finally. _Better because it means I'm not the only one who's…hurt and I'm not crazy, and worse because at least Nikoleta has full rights to feel like that. I didn't-I was dangerous and abnormal and whatever else._

Nikoleta gave Elsa's hand a comforting squeeze. "Well, _I_ think it should make both of us feel better. Because to be fair, neither of us can ever really know what the other one went through or felt like or for what reasons or anything. Not even if we blathered at each other for ages," she said confidently.

"My father chained me in the dungeon twice," Elsa blurted. _Why did I say that?!_

"My father locked me out of the house one night in the winter," Nikoleta replied.

"Mine kept me locked in my room for a decade and wouldn't let me talk to Anna, even though the door."

"Mine hit me a lot."

"I think you win."

"I think you do."

"I hate this," both of them said at once, and then began giggling.

Elsa hugged her friend tightly, happy tears trickling down her cheeks. _It's so nice to talk to another girl who really, genuinely understands completely._ "Is there something wrong with us because we were laughing about rotten things that happened to us?"

"I don't think so. It's kind of relieving to be able to talk about it in a lighthearted way, to be honest. I'd be upset and offended if someone who wasn't…hurt inside started joking about it, though. I've never had anyone like you to talk to. I never would have guessed the person who could understand the best was the queen." Nikoleta suddenly found herself gazing over Elsa's shoulder at someone cleaning up branches and the like about fifteen or twenty feet away. The someone waved at her, and she blushed. "Elsa, who's that?" she whispered.

Elsa looked, and then just began laughing. "His name's Espen, and yes, he's around the same age as you," she told her friend. "I am _not_ a romantic, so don't ask me what to say. You can go talk to him if you like, and I'll take Anikka and Eliot back inside. Just please be in the ballroom before eleven thirty."

Nikoleta's cheeks turned pink. "I'm a _girl_! I'm not s'posed to do the initiating. I don't even know him! And I'm not much more than a charity case!"

"So what you're a girl? That is so old-fashioned and dumb. If you want to talk to him, then do it. And you are not a charity case. You're my friend and a castle employee. Besides, Espen is working off a sentence, so even if you _were_ a charity case, you'd still have the so-called 'right' to approach him." Elsa paused before adding, "I _will_ vouch that he isn't a creep. I intend to hire him once his sentence is up."

Nikoleta wanted to ask why the boy Espen had a sentence in the first place if he was nice, but she decided not to ask. If Elsa said he wasn't a creep, she believed her. "Are you _sure_ it's all right?"

Elsa nodded. "Positive."

"What if he hates me?" Nikoleta asked in a small voice.

Elsa just gave Nikoleta's shoulder a reassuring squeeze. "Well, you won't know unless you talk to him, and I really don't think he will anyways," she said quietly. "Go ahead. I'll go inside." Elsa quickly strapped her brace back on her leg and then collected the two younger kids and headed back inside the castle.

 **A/N: So...yeah. Elsa and Nikoleta actually got to talk to someone else that felt like they did. I thought they both deserved it.:)**

 **Next chapter coming soon!**

 **P.S. A thank-you and shoutout to Dragonheart35, who made a really awesome sketch of Elsa and Linnae here: dragonheartftherpays on tumblr. Just search for 'Frozen' and it should come up. :)**


	19. Chapter 19

**A/N: Thanks to everyone who's followed/favorited and/or is reading but not reviewing** :)

 **Olivia O'Neil-Thank you:) Lol, I just figured Nikoleta and Espen would be a nice couple...and yes, I had been planning for that to happen eventually for awhile.:P Yes, Elsa and Eliot should have Gerda help them in the water because it's easier in it.:) That won't happen for a little while, but sometime soon.:)**

 **moohamquest-I figured Elsa ought to have a friend near her own age that also has a younger sibling...but still isn't identical to her.:) And yes, I agree, Max was very naughty, and if I were Elsa, I would _not_ let him off the hook that easily.:P**

 **Elsa Tomago-You're right, the twins shouldn't have done that...which is why Elsa got upset.:/ I figured since they were ten, they probably wouldn't understand that it's really mean. Elsa should have explained _why_ they shouldn't have done that, but she didn't know how. Water makes things feel lighter, that's all:) You can feel it. Yep, Anna and Elsa spend some time together ASAP.:) Elsa just has a new friend to talk to as well now, that's all:)**

 **orang biasa-There will most definitely be action soon, but I wanted this particular story to delve more into the characters' psychologies, like you pointed out. But no worries, there will be action soon...and a very big secret revealed, too.:) Nikoleta has been abused and she's been working to get money for her family since she was 13 (no, I did not say that specifically in the story; it's my headcanon backstory:P) I MIGHT make a spinoff about them/write other stuff about her and Eliot, but I don't know yet:) Thank you very much:)**

 **On to the story:)**

At eleven fifteen, Elsa, Anna, Nikoleta, and Kristoff were all in the ballroom, along with little Anikka and Eliot. "Espen said he'd seen me before and that he already liked me," Nikoleta whispered in Elsa's ear.

Elsa pretended she was gagging when she heard that. "Choke me," she deadpanned. That did not interest her in the least, but she was glad Nikoleta seemed happy.

Nikoleta would have been hurt by Elsa's seeming indifference, but she knew her friend was just being silly, so she didn't mind. "You're funny."

"I know." Elsa blue eyes sparkled mischievously at that comment, and she suddenly yelped when something started tickling her tummy. "Anna, you stop that!"

Anna didn't look the least bit apologetic, but she did stop tickling her sister. She looked at Elsa's face closely, trying to tell if she was nervous about the dance lesson or not; and was happy to find that Elsa seemed completely at ease, at least at the moment. _Elsa must have had fun swimming with Nikoleta and the little kids. I'm glad she has a friend nearer her own age now. She needed that. Well, I'm mostly happy anyways…_ Anna didn't want to admit it, but a bit of her was worried she would "lose" Elsa somehow if Elsa made a new friend. But…Elsa _deserved_ a new friend. Anna _wanted_ Elsa to have a new friend. Her poor sister ought to have all the friends in the world after everything that had happened to her. But Anna was still worried for some reason all the same.

As the minutes ticked closer to eleven thirty, Elsa's happy mood faded. Anna gave her hand a squeeze. "Elsa, it'll be fun," Anna said quietly.

 _No, it won't. I'm only doing this because I promised I would,_ Elsa thought to herself.

"It will only be as bad as you make it be," was Kristoff's not-entirely-helpful comment. He didn't like dancing much either, and still wasn't sure why he had let Anna talk him into this. At least he _sort of_ knew how to dance, thanks to Anna. Kristoff understood why Elsa wasn't the least bit excited at the whole thing. From what Anna had told him, Elsa had _never_ been very good at dancing, not when she was little and not now, either, although "I think she's just picking on herself some too and she could be better than she thinks," was exactly what Anna had said.

Elsa sighed and clasped her hands behind her back and then awkwardly started smoothing her skirt, which sort of needed smoothing but not really. She'd carefully chosen a regular cloth dress so she wouldn't make the American dance teacher nervous. "That is not exactly reassuring, Kristoff," she pointed out. _Besides me just feeling nervous for no reason at all (and because I hate meeting new people anyway…), I still want to know exactly why this lady moved to Arendelle in the first place. I don't want to be prejudiced or anything, but I know_ something _is at least a bit odd about it, even if it has nothing to do with the lady herself at all. Kai met her and he thought she was nice, so…maybe I'm just being paranoid. Anna always thinks new people are nice, so that doesn't particularly reassure me…_

* * *

"It is an…honor to meet you, your majesty," the American lady said in broken Norwegian to Elsa a few minutes later. She had dark hair just past shoulder-length and appeared to be somewhere in her mid thirties.

"I can translate your English if you like," Elsa offered quickly. She could easily see that the woman looked more than a little nervous, like she might offend Elsa or something. Elsa didn't say anything regarding how the lady addressed her, even though she still disliked being called by her title. She would wait and get to know her better before saying it was okay to just call her 'Elsa'. "May I ask your name? My sister did not tell me."

The woman was visibly relieved and yet slightly surprised at Elsa's reply. "Diane, your majesty. And…and you're fluent in my language?" she asked in surprise. Diane wasn't sure what she had expected, but it wasn't a young girl that immediately offered to translate spoken language herself. Why didn't she have a translator or something? Diane thought the young queen might be a bit nervous, but she couldn't be sure since the girl kept a polite smile on her face.

Elsa nodded. "I've had plenty of practice," she said simply, not wanting to give too much information about herself yet. She paused, unsure what she should say next, and she relaxed on the inside a tiny bit when she felt Anna give her hand a gentle squeeze. _Okay, Elsa, say something. You have to make a good impression._ "Ms. Diane, I hope you like it here," Elsa said finally. She kept her eyes on her visitor, hoping for _some_ sort of reaction that would give her a hint as to why Diane had moved to Arendelle.

"It seems safer here," was all Diane said. Her eyes suddenly seemed worried, which Elsa immediately picked up on, but she said nothing.

Anna spoke up, "Come on, you guys, let's not stand around talking all day. Let's have our lesson!" She grinned at their new teacher hopefully.

Diane asked Kristoff and Eliot to leave the room for the first portion of the lesson, somehow sensing that the girls weren't comfortable with the idea of ballet clothes at all…at least the queen herself and the brown-haired girl the queen had introduced as 'my friend Nikoleta' weren't. The princess didn't seem to mind one way or the other, and the little girl the queen had said was her adopted daughter didn't care, either. It was still slightly unnerving to her to see people she had only seen in a movie most definitely existing and alive, even though she'd known that would be the case. She also noticed that Queen Elsa stubbornly remained in one spot and hadn't taken a single step since she'd met her. What was that all about?

Anna also noticed the same thing, but she thought she knew _exactly_ why Elsa was doing that. "Elsa, you can't just stand there the whole time," she whispered, tugging her sister's arm. "Gerda made the dance clothes exactly like mine. You'll look fine." Anna knew Elsa hadn't want to feel like she was prancing about in the thing her magic had made before, so she'd asked Gerda to make Elsa something to wear, too. _Maybe Elsa forgot to put her dance clothes on under her dress?_

"That's not it."

Anna felt Elsa's arm stiffen, and she suddenly realized the real reason. "Elsa, she's going to know eventually. Ms. Diane won't care."

"Ms. Diane will too care!" Elsa's voice remained quiet, but not quiet enough that Diane couldn't hear her.

"I will care about what, your majesty?" Diane asked politely.

Elsa figuratively froze, and Anna spoke up instead. "She's just scared you won't like her because she has a bad leg, that's all," Anna explained. She felt the air temperature drop about ten degrees and instantly knew that was _not_ what Elsa had wanted her to say.

"Well, now that that's settled, I believe I shall excuse myself," Elsa said flatly, although her cheeks were pink in embarrassment. _Why did Anna say that?! That makes both her and me look like…like incompetent idiots. Me for feeling nervous and Anna for spouting off things._ She involuntarily flinched when she felt a hand on her shoulder.

"Elsa, since this nice lady knows, it shouldn't matter if you stay," Nikoleta said logically. "Maybe she's got some idea to help you dance easier," she suggested.

Elsa hesitated for only a second before deciding it would look worse if she left than if she stayed. The temperature returned to normal.

Diane's eyes grew big when she realized what had happened. The second the young queen had relaxed, the temperature had gone back to the way it was. She'd assumed that the castle's air conditioning had been faulty or something, but then she realized there _was_ no air conditioning, just like at her new place in town. _Elsa_ had done that without even trying. Somehow she'd thought that the movie she'd seen was a fairy tale-ized thing that just happened to be about real people for some reason. She wondered how much of the film was accurate to real life. So far _everything_ was identical. "Did you really make an ice palace up on the North Mountain?" Diane blurted childishly; then immediately regretted it. This wasn't a movie; it was real life. And if Elsa really did have ice magic, well then Diane did _not_ want to make her mad or offend her in any way. She didn't just have superpowers; she had a tremendous amount of authority, too. _Maybe she doesn't have 'magic' and she's been altered somehow…no, that can't be right. I don't know how I know, but that's wrong…_

But Elsa just smiled, her blue eyes twinkling. She held out one hand and let her signature snowflake float over her palm. "Does that answer your question?" she asked softly. "Yes, I did." _And it's one of the few things about me I'm genuinely proud of._ "Is there anything else you'd like to ask about that sort of thing?"

Diane relaxed. This girl was not going to hurt her, or if she did, it wouldn't be on purpose. Suddenly she was absolutely sure she had made the right decision to move here. This tiny nation was a hundred times safer than anywhere she had visited before, even if it had _one_ person in charge. An absolute monarch. Looking at Elsa face-to-face, Diane found it hard to believe this person was the sole person in charge of an entire country, tiny or not. She wasn't much more than a child. The one thing that was simultaneously childish and not childish at all was her face. Diane had been taught to read faces at her old job, had to or she wouldn't succeed. And Elsa's had the expression of a girl both naïve and far too mature for her age, a girl that actually had brains in her head but could probably be taken advantage of emotionally. "Is it as pretty in person as it is in the movie?" Diane asked finally.

"And how might I know that? I have never seen the moving picture," Elsa said truthfully.

"It's prettier in person than it is in the movie thing," Anna jumped in, positive that that was the case. "Can we please start the lesson now?"

* * *

Elsa grew frustrated only a couple minutes into the lesson, but she tried her best not to show it. Kai's idea that she could play the music for the lesson instead was kind of useless when Ms. Diane had brought a battery-powered CD player to use. She could tell Ms. Diane wasn't annoyed with her or anything for not being able to do everything (or know how, for that matter), but she was suspicious it was _only_ because of her braced leg, not because Ms. Diane was patient. This was because Elsa had already noticed that the teacher would jump all over Nikoleta and Anikka, who didn't really know how to dance either, and then would just say she could tell that Elsa was trying her best and that was it. And she corrected Anna some, but Elsa could tell that the teacher was impressed with Anna, who was _much_ better than she and Nikoleta and Anikka were.

Elsa eyed the battery-powered CD player. She wished she could just examine it and take it apart and see if it was possible to make an identical one with her magic instead. _If I'm going to learn how to dance, I'm asking Anna to teach me. I don't like this…I feel like Ms. Diane is patronizing me or something._ The other thing that was bothering her was that Anna had let her stay barefoot when she'd tried to help her the other day. Now she was wearing these funny little slipper-ish things Anna had bought specifically for this and the seams were just in the right spot to rub painfully on her ankle because of her brace. The more she tried to ignore it, the more annoying it became. And her legs were tired. And the whole thing was just altogether making her upset and grumpy.

Anna was not sorry in the least for trying to get Elsa to learn how to dance, but she _was_ sorry for making her upset and grumpy. She had been watching Elsa since the second the lesson started, and her big sister's expression had grown more and more…not happy with every passing minute. _Elsa isn't going to give up; I know she won't…_

Just then the music stopped, and Elsa let out a tiny sigh of relief when she heard Ms. Diane say that she was sorry, but she'd forgotten to replace the batteries in the CD player and she would need to go get more from her place. "I can play music on the piano for the rest of the lesson," Elsa suggested quickly. "There's one in here, too. I can improvise."

This arrangement worked well for everyone-Elsa didn't have to dance any more and everyone else could still have their lesson. Elsa decided she would just do this from now on, along with translating Diane's English into Norwegian for the others. This was _much_ better.

* * *

After the lesson was over, Elsa immediately excused herself, not wanting to appear pushy or rude by peppering Ms. Diane with questions. She'd let Anna talk to her and then she could just ask Anna what was said later. The second Elsa was gone, Diane asked if she could have permission to say something. She had been debating with herself whether she should say it-it was none of her business and she barely knew the royal sisters besides. But something told her it would be fine. "Princess Anna, if you haven't done so already, U.S. doctors might be able to mend Queen Elsa's leg, depending on what's wrong with it. I know it's none of my business, but…"

Anna frowned. "Why would United States doctors be able to help my sister? It's permanent, and besides, that ol' troll said-"

"Troll? What's that supposed to mean, your highness?" Diane asked, unsure what the Arendelle princess meant by that.

Anna immediately backtracked, somehow knowing that neither Elsa nor Grand Pabbie would want all this information told to someone who had just moved here, nice or not. "Just that one of the doctors is like a troll," she amended, which was _sort of_ true, right? Grand Pabbie was literally a troll, so he was like a troll too… _riiight?_ Well, it wasn't a lie, anyways, just misleading. "Anyways, I don't think Elsa's leg is fixable. And she doesn't need fixing, besides." _I know Elsa's using her magic to help her leg and Gerda's helping her too, but I'm not saying that…_

"Pardon my forwardness, Princess Anna, but you don't seem to have the same technological amenities the United States does, so I assume your medical knowledge is the same. I just thought perhaps more up-to-date knowledge might help her," Diane explained. "If you'll excuse the question, how long has Queen Elsa been that way?"

While Anna was not a people reader like Elsa, she decided she did not like all these questions. They were personal and rude, and while Anna wasn't one to stand on formalities, she still found this inappropriate. Couldn't Ms. Diane tell that Elsa's leg was a sensitive subject for her? And it seemed like she was…what was that word Anna had heard Elsa say before…insin…insen…insinuating…yes, that was it… _insinuating…_ that her big sister wasn't good enough the way she was. That there was something wrong with Elsa that needed to be fixed.

Anna decided she would _never_ tell Ms. Diane that Elsa had panic attacks sometimes and got really upset and hurt easily. Never ever.

"I don't particularly think I want to talk about this," Anna said finally. "Ms. Diane, I still think you're a pretty much nice person, but I don't like it when people are kinda sorta picking on Elsa and yet aren't. I think maybe you haven't been around someone like Elsa before and that makes you judge her way too quickly." She thought for a minute before adding, "Please don't make me regret hiring you or introducing you to my friends and family." Anna knew how Elsa was more than a little suspicious at the goings-on in the United States, so she added, "I'm not a good people-reader, so you had better be trustworthy." _There. Elsa told me last night to use weaknesses to our advantage if need be. Now if something's wrong, she'll be 'sloppy' around me 'cause she'll think I won't know. I don't think Ms. Diane is a creep or anything, but_ something's _odd and I don't like the way she's talking about Elsa._

Diane was taken aback at Anna's response. She'd already pegged the princess as a happy-go-lucky girl and that was about it. That was completely wrong. Princess Anna was obviously far more outgoing and energetic than her quiet older sister, but she was also keenly protective of Queen Elsa and definitely wasn't stupid. And she wasn't struggling to hide nervousness or upset-ness like Elsa had, either. _Anna should be in charge,_ she found herself thinking. Although Elsa was the one with the ice powers, Diane sensed that the more dangerous of the two was Anna, not Elsa. And she knew why, too.

 _Elsa is still frightened of hurting people._

Diane had no idea what to say...or that she'd just said that thought aloud. Anything she said, she now knew that Anna would immediately tell her sister and who knew who else.

Anna's blue-green eyes flashed in anger. "Why did you just say that?" she asked in her best grown-up voice. _Something's wrong! I wish Elsa were here…_ She wished Elsa had come off differently to Ms. Diane, too. Now this lady had figured out something very…not good, if she wasn't who she said she was. Or maybe she was, and Anna was just overreacting. That was also possible. Anna hoped that was the case.

"Say what, Princess Anna?" Diane asked; then realized what had happened. "Oh, I'm sorry, your highness, I just…I have no excuse; I'm sorry." She hesitated for a minute before deciding to tell this young princess the truth. "Reading people played an important role in my previous job, Princess Anna…I realized it was useful for everyday life and so I still do it."

 _She didn't apologize for saying that about Elsa,_ Anna thought. She was ninety-nine percent sure that Ms. Diane's words and actions were completely normal in her country, but they were rude, rude, rude in Anna's. Sure, there was gossip all over Arendelle-Anna _knew_ that; she'd _heard_ it-but in general, people didn't bother others they barely knew with really personal questions and then not even apologize for it. Anna hesitated, wondering what Elsa would say if she were there. "What was your old job?" Anna asked finally.

The American lady's face paled at that. She knew the Arendelle princess wouldn't understand if she didn't go into detail, so she merely said, "A CIA agent. I did not agree with one of my assignments." This _was_ true, but she didn't add that the assignment she hadn't agreed with involved the young ice wielder herself. Diane's disillusionment with the whole thing had gotten her fired. Deep inside, she knew most of the people at her workplace weren't bad or anything like that, but there were two specific individuals that just…unnerved her. They certainly didn't mean well, at least, and one of them had been her boss.

"What's CIA?" Anna asked curiously. It sounded like a spy thing to Anna, which was kind of cool and kind of creepy, too.

Diane answered carefully. "It's an intelligence agency. You would probably think of it as-"

"As an infiltration system or a spy ring?" Elsa's voice finished coolly from the doorway. "I merely came back because I forgot to say thank-you for the lesson. I suppose it's a good thing I did." She walked straight over to where Ms. Diane and Anna were talking and gently pushed Anna aside so she was standing protectively in front of Anna. "I don't know what you are here for, not yet. But I _will_ find out. If it's nothing, then I will owe you a large apology. But if you _are_ spying for someone or something, then you will be sorry. I will not be taken advantage of if I can help it." Elsa spotted Linnae peeking in through the doorway and sent a silent message to the dragon. _Please just come a tiny bit closer. Just enough so Ms. Diane can see you,_ she 'told' the ice dragon.

Linnae immediately obliged, and the second Ms. Diane saw the dragon, she screamed. "Your majesty, I swear I don't want to hurt you or your country or anyone in it! I'm sorry if I offended you! What _is_ that thing?!" Diane was simultaneously terrified and impressed. Had little Elsa, who she knew was still scared of hurting people, at least a little bit, made that thing?

" 'That thing' is my ice dragon, and her name is Linnae. She's friendly, but if you try to hurt me or anyone else, she'll get angry," Elsa replied. She wasn't telling the whole truth-that Linnae would only protect Elsa and those closest to her automatically and that any other defending would require a direct order from Elsa-but she was not going to explain all that. Or that she could silently communicate with her created guardian. Elsa remembered what Kai had told her-to use her weaknesses to her advantage-and she realized that she didn't want to appear too powerful to Diane, not right now. She had to 'mess up' a bit of what she had portrayed by showing Diane her dragon, just a bit, though. That would appear confusing. So she dropped her eyes to the floor and then abruptly stumbled backwards into Anna. "It happened _again_ ," she muttered quietly, as if in irritation. "Anna, you know what to do. It hurts." _Anna, please understand. Please._ Elsa knew she could not chance sending a 'please understand' look at her sister, nor could she let Ms. Diane see her eyes well enough to try to read them. If Ms. Diane _was_ some sort of spy-agent-person, she probably knew how to read people's faces well.

Anna was scared and then confused at Elsa's actions, but she understood just in time. _Elsa wants Ms. Diane to think her leg bothers her randomly sometimes so she doesn't appear too powerful since she just showed her Linnae._ "It's all right, Elsa, I'm sure Ms. Diane doesn't mind." Hoping she was doing the right thing, she picked Elsa up and carried her over to the piano bench. "Just sit for a little while, sis."

Diane stood awkwardly, glancing from the ice dragon in the doorway to the sisters by the piano and back again. She could tell only too well that neither girl trusted her now, especially Elsa. _I wish I hadn't told them where I'd come from._ At least Elsa physically couldn't come after her even if she wanted to…could she? As long as she didn't do anything remotely threatening, Elsa's weird ice creature wouldn't hurt her either. She remembered the movie and was just puzzled. Elsa did not make ice dragons in the movie and she wasn't crippled, either. Then again, movies always took liberties when they were based on a true story, right? "Queen Elsa, what can I do that would make you believe that I don't wish you or your country any harm?" she asked in a slightly worried tone.

Elsa narrowed her eyes and looked straight at Diane's face. _She's telling the truth. Something is wrong, but it's not Ms. Diane herself._ Elsa was absolutely sure Ms. Diane wasn't wishing her ill; she wasn't a mind reader, but she could tell the lady wasn't lying to her. "Nothing. I believe you," she said quietly. "What you can do is stay away from this CIA thing if you don't want to hurt us."

"I was fired for not wanting to have anything to do with an assignment," Diane repeated the information she had told Anna. "The assignment had to do with you, your majesty."

Elsa frowned and struggled to her feet. "If it had to do with me and the CIA thing fired you, why are you here?" she asked, mostly curious but still wary.

"This is the last place they'll look for me. I gave them the impression I was scared of you and didn't want to stay in a place with no electric lights and the like for any length of time," Diane explained. "Besides, Queen Elsa, I've been wanting to move for awhile. It's…nice here. Weird, no offense, but nice."

To Diane's surprise, Elsa laughed and gave her a lopsided smile. "I daresay I would do the same," she deadpanned. The smile and laughter disappeared as she added, "Ms. Diane, what did your CIA want with me? I haven't done anything to the United States, nothing at all." _I know I haven't…_

"It's not 'my' CIA; I don't even work there any longer," Diane repeated again, wanting to clarify beyond a shadow of a doubt that she didn't want anything to do with that anymore. "Queen Elsa, the Central Intelligence Agency's job is to coordinate government intelligence activities. They wanted me to basically spy on you and report back to them."

Elsa shrugged, not understanding why Diane would be so against that. Other countries investigated their neighbors. Slightly disturbing privacy-wise, but normal. "Ms. Diane, I am not thrilled by that, but I do not understand why that's something you wouldn't want to do. That sounds like what a government intelligence employee is supposed to do. In other words, I hate it, but it sounds normal," Elsa said. She knew her father wouldn't put up with such things and had outlawed that sort of behavior in Arendelle, but he had also taught her that it was normal, just something you would get rid of if you came across it. You kicked said individuals out never to return.

Diane couldn't help staring at her. She'd expected Elsa to get worried or scared or perhaps angry, not shrug and say that. "Queen Elsa, I have no idea how your laws on such things and the like work or how it's accepted, but they didn't want information about you just to make sure you didn't mean the U.S. any harm."

"What did the Central Intelligence Agency of your country want information about me for then?" Elsa asked, slightly suspicious now.

"Weapons and testing," Diane said quietly. "My job would have been to get information about you and eventually ask if you would be willing to participate once I'd befriended you. If you _weren't_ friendly or agreeable, if you were a threat, I was supposed to find a way to neutralize you. Those things are why I turned the assignment down."

"In what? Participate in what?" Elsa's voice was barely a whisper; she had an inkling of what that meant, and it made her want to throw up. She felt Anna give her hand a gentle squeeze, and she tried her best to relax and not appear worried or tense. Even if Ms. Diane was indeed nice, she didn't want to look scared. At all.

Diane hesitated before telling the truth. "All anyone knows about you is that you have control over ice and snow. If you did indeed freeze Arendelle by accident and not even know about it like you did in the movie, you would be a valuable, very powerful weapon. And if there was some way to replicate whatever gave you your power and put it in others as well, that could be useful to both repel terrorist attacks…and help them, if it got into the wrong hands."

Elsa's already pale face had gone white, but her expression remained impassive otherwise. _Elsa, stay calm. And don't stutter._ "Why didn't your president just ask me for help? I would be happy to help stop terrorist attacks, if that term means what I think it does. It means some group randomly attacking innocents, right?" Elsa's voice was slightly shaky, but with Anna at her side, she managed to hold herself together.

Diane nodded. She had suggested to her boss the very thing Elsa had just suggested, and he had immediately shut that suggestion down. "Queen Elsa, a lot of people don't even know if you're human. People don't have built-in powers like you do. They just don't. Kids love you in that movie, but finding out there is a real person who wields powers scares adults. Those who aren't scared are apt to want to use you. There are those who think the whole thing is a government hoax. And if you weren't human, scientists would be free to use you as an experiment…" Her voice trailed off. Diane could see what this whole conversation was doing to both sisters, and she wished the whole thing wasn't true. Anna looked _very_ angry, and Elsa just looked hurt.

Although Elsa was trying her absolute best to hold herself together, she could feel herself shaking all over and her eyes burned with tears. She clutched Anna's hand tightly and just said, "I should like t-to hear more, but I've had quite enough for today. I must go. Kai will show you out. I'll expect you tomorrow at th-three in the afternoon if that's all right." Elsa saw the American lady nod in agreement, and she left the room as fast as she could.

 **A/N: So...yeah. That happened. Don't worry, the U.S. government isn't just being mean to Elsa and her country for no reason, and not everyone there feels negatively about her, either. Just a new, more complicated issue, that's all, since there's multiple POVs people could think.:P**

 **Next chapter coming soon!:)**


	20. Chapter 20

**A/N: Thanks to everyone who's followed/favorited and/or is reading but not reviewing!:)**

 **(Yes, I realize I updated this yesterday, but I had another chapter ready, so I decided to go ahead and share it.:))**

 **Elsa Tomago-I figured Anna had good reason to be a little worried, even though she genuinely wants Elsa to make friends on her own.:) Yep, you got it! More information coming up soon.:) Well, I won't promise that nothing bad will happen, but I will say that Elsa is NOT going to end up as an experiment. She might get herself in trouble, but that will not happen.**

 **Olivia O'Neil-Yes...like Diane pointed out, some people don't even know if she's human or not (can you imagine what would happen if someone showed up in your city that had ice magic like Elsa's?!), which makes those people think they wouldn't be violating any human rights and things like that. There are others that are merely curious about her and others that think she's a government hoax, etc, etc, etc. Basically a bunch of controversy and rumors because no one knows the truth. To be fair, I'm sure people who'd be just curious and didn't want to hurt her in any way could do tests and the like without harming her (like seeing just how low of a temperature she could make-can she produce absolute zero? if so, does a colder temperature exist? etc), but they'd need to earn her trust first, which just isn't happening right now. I figured Elsa would be suspicious for that very reason...I mean, Elsa is used to no electric lights, no cars, no computers, etc, but people from outside her country and the rest of the world she's familiar with (Weselton, Corona...) are not. Thank you:)**

 **orang biasa-I'll write more about them eventually (slight non-spoilery hint: they'll play a bigger role in the story in a few chapters:)) Okay, I'll try to explain it better.:) Diane turned the assignment down because she didn't agree with the reasoning behind it. Doing that made her boss think she wasn't entirely loyal, so he fired her. After that, she needed a place to hide in case anyone came after her (people who know too much can get in trouble with government agencies like that, I know...), and what better place than the very destination she had refused to go to? Her reasoning should be a bit clearer after this chapter.:) Thank you! I thought it made for a good storyline since neither side has an accurate picture of the other. Lol, next chapter, technically. Heads up for a cliffhanger then.:) To be honest...no. Absolutely not. And after I'd written the scene where she was permanently hurt originally (Mind Games, ch 18) I thought for ages for a logical way to heal her right then. What I came up with was what happened in ch 23 of Mind Games, and while I'm satisfied with the logic behind it, I still don't like it. I'm sure if Elsa really was real, she'd be pretty upset with me for writing her into that situation. Oh well.:P Anyways, once Elsa becomes an ice master, she'll be able to heal her leg so she can walk on her own again without her brace. (check Changing Family Tides ch 15 for how that would work:)) Sorry for the long explanation. I hope that helped. Thank you, and that's perfectly fine-I just didn't know what to say, lol. :P :)**

 **On to the story!:)**

Anna scooped Elsa up the second they were out of the ballroom since the older girl was shaking so badly she was having trouble walking. "Elsa, think about something else," Anna ordered. "Please try not to panic again." She spotted Kai and told him, "Elsa said for you to show Ms. Diane out." Still holding Elsa, Anna headed straight for her sister's little ice-elevator and stepped in. "Elsa, make the ice-elevator work," she instructed.

Elsa touched one shaky hand to the right button and the ice-elevator instantly shot up to the second floor…much more quickly than usual, but Anna ignored that and carried Elsa to her (Elsa's) room. The second the door shut, tears began streaming down Elsa's pale cheeks, and Anna plopped down in the comfy chair in the corner, still holding her sister tightly. "Elsa, we're going to be fine," she whispered, hoping very much that that was true. Anna had a horrible picture of finding Elsa in some weird place being treated like an experiment, and she promised to herself she was _never_ letting Elsa be alone until this was completely straightened out. At least that way if something bad happened, Elsa wouldn't be by herself. She would make sure someone was always with her, even if she herself couldn't be there. _Elsa can just make her ice bubble if she needs to,_ Anna reminded herself. "I'm not gonna let you be some experiment subject, Elsa. I won't."

Elsa looked up at her little sister, tears still running down her cheeks. Snowflakes floated around her, and she held her hands close against her chest. "I'm not a…a… _thing_! I'm not! A-Am I?" she asked desperately. People outside her country didn't even think she was human. _They didn't think she was human._ They weren't even calling her nasty names; they were implying she wasn't even the same species.

Anna bit her lip and hugged Elsa closer. "No, Elsa, you're not," she tried to reassure her.

"They're not even just calling me defective or messed up or a freak or something," Elsa said softly. She knew in her heart that no matter what awful things she might be, she was still a human girl. And yet…Ms. Diane had implied that more than a few people didn't even consider her that. "I'm not even good enough to be considered a…a…a broken girl that needs to be fixed?" _Why? What did I do wrong? What if I can't fix whatever it is?_

Anna knew only too well what Elsa meant by that, and it made her cry herself. _Why would anyone think of Elsa like that? Even mean ol' Dad knew she was human!_ She just continued holding Elsa tightly and let Elsa hide her face in her shoulder. The odd thing Anna noticed was despite the fact that Elsa was obviously distressed-she was crying her heart out, for goodness sakes-she still wasn't too cold to hold. There were snowflakes floating around her and her body temperature was definitely even cooler than usual, but Anna could still hold her without feeling like she was going to freeze. A quick peek at Elsa's hand revealed frost crawling up her arms, but it wasn't harming her. Anna couldn't help smiling at that as she gave Elsa's freezing hand a reassuring squeeze. _Elsa's magic isn't hurting her even though she's really upset. She's not shooting ice all over the place or making it cut up her hands._ "Elsa, is your bad leg hurting you?" Anna asked now, remembering that it usually pained Elsa when she grew upset.

Elsa nodded but didn't otherwise react. Her leg actually hurt a _lot_ ; but the spasms were usual to her from getting upset, so she ignored it. She suddenly noticed the frost all over her arms and stared at it in alarm. "What did I do to myself?!" she asked in surprise. Almost instantly the frost vanished, so quickly Elsa thought she might have imagined it.

Anna grinned. "Your magic is learning how to react non-destructively when you get freaked out or upset, Elsa. I _know_ that's what it is. You didn't shoot ice everywhere or even get a bit of it on me or the chair or the floor. Or cut up your own hands again. You just let frost form on your arms instead, and since you're immune to cold, it didn't hurt you. You still made a bunch of snowflakes, but that's it. And your leg started hurting again, but it's directly linked with your magic now, so that makes sense." She gently helped Elsa to her feet as she added, "I think this proves you're slowly but surely learning to be an ice master like you're supposed to be."

Elsa didn't smile, but she was no longer tense and her tears had disappeared. "I don't want to be an ice master," she said quietly. "I just want to be a normal human girl like you or Nikoleta or Anikka. It's probably the one thing I can never be no matter what I do."

Anna frowned, but she held her sister's pained gaze and refused to let her look away. "Elsa, you _are_ normal, just like you are. You _know_ that, I know you do. And you do too want to be an ice master, you stinker. That's how you're going to be able to have your leg all better again, or at least mostly, and-"

"If I'm normal, then why do a lot of people in Ms. Diane's country think I'm not even human?" Elsa interrupted. "Anna, that _hurts_. I'm not even good enough to be considered a girl that's just messed up or something? _Why_? What did I do wrong?" Elsa's blue eyes welled with tears again as she clutched Anna's hands tightly. Right now she didn't care about her leg at all one way or the other. She just wanted to understand why people would think she wasn't even human. "I just want to fix whatever it is. Can you help me? Please?" _I just want to know what I did wrong. What if I can't fix it? What if Anna can't help me fix it?_

"Those people don't know you, Elsa. I think it prob'ly has more to do with 'fear of the unknown' than thinking you're 'not good enough'. You didn't do anything wrong. Elsa, _please_ believe me. I hate seeing you cry like this." Struck by a sudden impulse, Anna quickly brushed her sister's tears away and then tugged her over to a mirror. "Look, Elsa. Those people have never seen you in person. Look at yourself. Do you _really_ think anyone that sees you is going to think you're not human?"

Elsa slowly shook her head. Even she had to admit that the girl in the mirror _definitely_ looked unmistakably human. She did not look like some unsavory nasty creature. She looked like a skinny young girl with too-big blue eyes, pale skin, and weird-colored hair. Definitely not _pretty_ , but not some disgusting alien thing, either. _Anna's right. I didn't do anything wrong. Those people think I'm not human because people are generally not supposed to have ice powers, that's all. It doesn't mean they…hate me. Ms. Diane even said kids loved me in that moving picture thing. Wait…United States children_ like _me? They like me?_ "U.S. children think I'm a fairy tale character," she said softly, knowing she was right. A lopsided smile spread across her face as she turned back to Anna. "Anna, I guess that means you were sort of right all along," Elsa whispered, as if she didn't dare to say it any louder.

"About what?"

Elsa's big blue eyes shone with happy tears as she tried to explain what she meant. "You told me that I belonged in a fairy tale when we were little. I…I…maybe you were sort of right. Maybe we're basically a sort of fairy tale epic story in the real world, along with everyone else…and that makes absolutely no sense. Never mind."

Anna just instinctively hugged Elsa close. "No, I understand, Elsa. I understand perfectly. You're happy the United States kids like you, even if they think you're a fairy tale character, that's all. You don't have to reason it out," she reassured her. "And you know what else? I really think we're going to be fine. If those agency government people are that into the idea of having weapons based on you, then they won't want to make you fight back, either. You're too strong and they don't know what you can do. So there."

Elsa gave her little sister a rueful smile. "I suppose that's one good thing about this." She hesitated before telling Anna about her plan to go to the United States with Kai in disguise and why she thought it was even more important with their new information. _Anna, please understand…_

"Why do you have to do that since Ms. Diane is here? I don't wanna risk you getting hurt. I mean, I know Kai would take care of you, but…" Anna scowled. She _hated_ that idea so much she could hardly stand it. _Elsa has to stay home where it's safe! She's been hurt too many times already._

"Anna, that's all the more reason to go. I believe that she doesn't mean us any harm, but she hasn't told us everything. I _know_ she hasn't. She probably doesn't know everything, either. I want clear information from a book on…on modern technology things. I'll be fine," Elsa told her sister. She didn't add her final thought, _I hope._

* * *

"Yes, Queen Elsa, you could easily get around in disguise with that cover story, but you would have to use cash for everything to keep from being tracked," Diane said the next day in the library after Elsa had told her a vague description of her plan. Diane was so relieved that Elsa obviously harbored no ill feelings towards her from the day before. She had no desire to be tossed out of her new home she had set up; she could no longer return to the United States without risking getting herself caught or something.

"Tracked?" Elsa asked, puzzled. "How else would you pay for things without trading for them or paying money for them?"

Diane realized the young queen had absolutely zero knowledge of credit cards or electronic payments or anything else of the sort. She tried to come up with something that would make sense to a girl that had never been around such things in her life. "I imagine you keep a written record of transactions. It's basically a digital way of doing the same thing, but your paper trails are far more private. With electronic payments and credit cards, people who know how can get to your personal information and see what, where, and when you buy things," Diane explained, hoping Elsa would understand. She pulled her own credit card out of her wallet and handed it to Elsa. The thing was pointless here; sure, she could buy things online, but then she'd still have to put in an address for shipping, even if it was just a P.O. box across Lake Erie in Ohio, and she didn't want _any_ risk of being traced, no matter how small.

"Why would people want to use this if it invades their privacy like that?" Elsa asked curiously, examining the little plastic card closely. She easily understood the general idea of how the system worked, but she was _very_ curious how it actually worked-the actual technicalities behind it.

"Convenience, mostly. And a good portion of the general public doesn't know about the privacy risks, either. Queen Elsa, the other issue that you may want to consider is procuring a fake ID. I don't know how you planned to get in the country, but you'll need an ID to get over the border," Diane said, hoping she wasn't being too pushy.

"We won't need IDs to get over the border, but Kai will need one once we're inside," Elsa mused, half to herself and half to Diane. Elsa had no intentions of going through any border patrol thing; she and Kai would fly on Linnae to the U.S. in the dark, and then she would send Linnae home and either she'd make an ice-car that she and Kai would paint or they would buy a junky car that didn't cost very much.

Now Diane was confused. How could Elsa think she wouldn't need an ID?! "Pardon me, but you _will_ need an ID, even if your cover character is someone younger than yourself. They won't even let you in without one."

Elsa _mostly_ trusted that Ms. Diane was genuinely trying to help-she wouldn't have told her anything otherwise-but she didn't want to reveal everything on the slim chance that something was off about her. "I have a plan for that; we wouldn't be going through a border check or anything. I just want Kai to have an ID for the possibility that we get stopped or checked or whatever, that's all. My cover character is a minor-I don't see why anyone would check an adopted teenager's ID," she explained.

"I can get you one," Diane offered. "I have _one_ acquaintance that would do it. I could call them on a cell phone and you could pick them up somewhere, maybe."

Elsa immediately shook her head. "Absolutely not. Ms. Diane, at the moment I feel like you're genuinely trying to help, but I can't risk picking up faux IDs from an acquaintance of yours. How do I know you're genuinely trying to help and your friend isn't going to double cross us? Or that your friend would accidentally tell the wrong person and get _everyone_ in trouble? You have strange payment devices that can track people. Who says your communication phone things aren't trackable as well? I will not put Kai in danger like that," she said firmly. "Look, what you _can_ do is tell me where I can buy a cheap car and how to get it without needing an ID in the first place."

Diane stared, not for the first time, at Elsa. Elsa might have had something wrong with her that made her still scared of hurting people, but Diane thought the girl's mind was sharp as a whip. She hadn't expected Elsa to be as…careful with her plans; she'd figured she would have to be the one explaining all the things that Elsa should not do in the U.S. that could potentially get her into any sort of trouble, no matter how remote. "I have a feeling you'll be just fine. You have good instincts on things I'm fairly sure you haven't learned about before, Queen Elsa. If you want to buy a car without an ID, you'll want to find a private seller and you would have to pay cash in full. And it might not be from a reputable person, either. What sort of car did you want? I'll look for one for you online tonight." Diane had a mobile wi-fi device that her 'one acquaintance' was handling the bills for, and a solar charger for her laptop computer.

"I don't care. Something easy to drive that will blend in with every other thing people are driving. What is 'online'?" Elsa asked curiously. "Is that a modern technology thing like a computer?"

Diane thought of suggesting that Elsa look up all the information she wanted online, but then held back, knowing the information and books Elsa wanted were _not_ going to be things Diane wanted in her search history, just in case. Looking for a slightly junky car online would actually help hide her; if someone ever got into her laptop, they'd assume she was somewhere in the U.S. still. So Diane didn't tell Elsa exactly how 'online' worked, knowing the young queen would immediately think of looking for the information she wanted there instead. "It's a way to buy things from a computer, yes," she said carefully.

Elsa narrowed her eyes. _Ms. Diane is telling me the truth, but that's not the whole story…_ "You aren't telling me something," she said in a quiet voice. "Why?"

Diane figuratively froze. _She's good. Too good._ Although Diane had over a decade on Elsa in years, she sensed that Elsa was all too used to people not telling her things. The girl was an impeccable people-reader. And Elsa-and her little sister and her friend-were not like the girls their ages in Diane's native country. Diane was suddenly absolutely sure that even if Elsa was most likely really awkward in a social setting, her words would keep up with people more than twice her age. Because of this, Diane decided to tell Elsa the truth. "You can also use the internet-that's what 'online' is-to look up information, and I don't want you looking up that sort of thing on my laptop computer."

"Why is looking for a car okay and looking up the information I want is not?" Elsa's expression remained deadly calm, although she kept her hands clutching her skirt. She was wearing her original ice-dress and that fabric wouldn't show any power mistakes should she make one. Elsa still sensed no ill from the American lady, but she also knew there was a lot the woman wasn't sharing with her.

"Because there is a very, very remote chance my laptop's history will be found or hacked remotely eventually, and buying a car is normal activity-might even help keep me hidden. The information you seek is 'suspicious activity'," Diane explained reluctantly. _I can't risk angering her and making her want to deport me or something…_ Diane knew in her heart that Elsa did not want to hurt her in any way; she was merely suspicious, and rightly so.

Elsa considered this for a minute, and finally just said, "All right. I understand. Thank you." _Okay, that makes sense. And…if this device thing is traceable somehow, that means it won't trace to me anyway…it should help both Ms. Diane_ and _me, then._

* * *

TWO DAYS LATER…

"Miss Elsa, I still don't like this. It seems risky," Gerda said, frowning. She was helping Elsa get ready to leave; Anna sat in the comfy chair in the corner of Elsa's room, wanting to spend as much time as possible with Elsa before she left. "Still, I must admit, I don't see how anyone who doesn't already know you would recognize you any too easily." Gerda gently nudged Elsa over to the mirror so she could see herself. "Although you still look like…you to me, really."

Elsa hesitantly put one hand out and touched her reflection. "That's… _me_?" she whispered. "That girl looks…normal." Elsa suddenly felt eight years old again, like from the time Gerda had helped her get ready for a (stupid) party at which she was supposed to play the sonata she'd been working on. Sure, this time she was 'dressed up' in a light pink t-shirt and a plain brown knee-length skirt, but that was what it reminded her of all the same.

Anna frowned as she watched her sister. "You _are_ normal, you stinker," she informed Elsa indignantly.

Gerda did not like the way Elsa was talking about herself, so she pulled the girl away from the mirror and just gave her a hug. "Your sister is right. 'That girl' looks normal because she _is_ normal, just like you always are. Miss Elsa, you do realize we didn't really do anything to make you look different. We just tied your hair back with those pink ribbons and you put on…how do I put this…different clothes. This will rely more on the way you act than anything else."

"I know. If someone asks me questions, I'm actually _supposed_ to act shy and let Kai do the talking. And whatever happens, don't use my magic. My name is Nicolette and Kai is a professor who adopted me." Elsa repeated the main points of the cover story easily. In Elsa's mind, she really wouldn't need to act very much. She'd just have to act how she always felt when she was in public and had to cover up.

Gerda took Elsa's hands and looked her right in the eyes. " _Please_ be careful. You can't get hurt there, Miss Elsa. You _will_ get found out if you do. Do _not_ go to any modern medical clinic like Ms. Diane suggested to you, either. Please. I'm not trying to be bossy; I'm just worried for you."

Elsa tilted her head to one side, not quite sure why Gerda would be so adamant that she not go to any clinic, although she hadn't had any intentions of doing so anyways. "As long as I'm not using my powers, what difference would it make?" she asked curiously.

"Miss Elsa, your blood is slightly different because of your magic, and I don't know what modern things they might have that could find out your leg injury was originally caused by magic or something. It's just a precaution, that's all." Gerda gave Elsa another hug and just held her tightly for a moment. _Elsa is not going to get hurt. She'll be fine._ "You come back safe and sound."

Elsa clutched the directions to the used car seller's address and the motel and the bookstore that Diane had given her as she stood in the courtyard with Kai and Linnae. Now that the moment had come to actually do this, she felt nervous. _Nothing's going to happen. We'll be fine,_ she reminded herself. She had told Olaf to stay in her room and make Anna feel better should they not come back the next night or something. Kai had half of their U.S. dollars and she had the other half, just in case. Diane had given Elsa her own American money, saying she no longer had any use for it, so Elsa was very sure she and Kai had enough money to do everything they needed to. The other thing Diane had given Elsa was a large purse (Elsa had promptly put a small revolver in it, wrapped up in her extra 'American outfit', along with the money, things for an emergency-Gerda had told her to take those things-and food for two days, which made both Diane and Kai stare at her funny). "A revolver doesn't fit your cover story persona," they'd pointed out, but Elsa did not care. Nobody would see it. Everything was planned out.

Anna hugged Elsa as tightly as she could. "Elsa, if you aren't back in two days, I am coming after you, I swear," she whispered firmly. "I don't like this." Anna fully understood why both she and Elsa couldn't go, but she hated the idea of Elsa going somewhere with only Kai to protect her. If Elsa used her magic, they would be caught. Yes, Elsa could probably get away if that happened, but then far too much information about her would get out and it would cause drama they didn't need. Logically, Anna understood that, but it still worried her. A lot.

"I'll be able to contact Linnae while I'm gone. If we run into trouble, I'll send Linnae a message and she'll come back and take you to Corona to get more help. I've already made a backup plan-I'm not going to tell you the whole thing, though, just in case," Elsa told her. "So if you see Linnae without Kai and me riding her, you'll know something has gone wrong, all right?" _I'm sending Linnae to Corona anyway after she drops us off, and she'll tell Rapunzel what's going on. Linnae will stay there, and she'll come back and pick Kai and me up when I send for her._

Anna scowled. "You sound like you're expecting something to go wrong!"

"She is being careful, princess," Kai corrected. "Most likely nothing will happen."

 **A/N: Just wanted to say...I know I've kind of made my own country look very...not good here, but no worries, that's not the whole picture. I figure Elsa and her family and friends would be just as suspicious of the U.S. as the U.S. is of them, and since this is mostly from Elsa's POV, she's obviously pretty suspicious of everything, especially considering some agency she's never heard of wants her for reasons that make her upset.**

 **Next chapter coming soon!**


	21. Chapter 21

**A/N: Thanks to everyone who's followed/favorited and/or is reading but not reviewing:)**

 **Olivia O'Neil-I suppose that depends on what your definition of 'okay' is.:P Elsa mostly wants to find out about modern technology, but she also wants to see a bit of her country's neighbor for herself and she also wants some info about said neighbor's government. :)**

 **Elsa Tomago-You're welcome:) Agreed, of course they think that. Elsa doesn't mind that, though.:) Well, 'careful' sometimes isn't good enough...:P *cue corny cliffhanger music* :)**

 **FluffyKitten-Thank you for deciding to review finally:) I don't mind, although I do love reading readers' feedback, lol.:P Not horribly wrong, just some wrong.:) (Elsa's better at using her magic now, and she knows how to act to keep from being identified in the first place.:)) I'd probably first be too shocked and nervous to say anything, and then I'd probably end up saying something stupid, or cry...especially if it was Elsa.:/ She helps me feel better when I'm upset sometimes, to be honest (and yes, I know that sounds stupid). Lol, I'll say up front that won't happen ON THIS TRIP, but it will happen later in the story:) And you're welcome.:)**

 **orang biasa-You're welcome. I'm sorry I said so much to explain it, lol.:P Because she doesn't trust anyone to do it; she wants to see for herself. (And a smidgen because, eventual chance to kick butt, haha:) ) Thank you:) I actually did nothing on July 4th (no fireworks; it rained! :( ), but still.:)**

 **On to the story!**

The second it was completely dark, Linnae took off. _Elsa, my eyesight is much better than that of humans, but I still cannot read signs from the sky,_ she warned.

"We are heading to a city called Cleveland, or the outskirts of it, at least," Elsa told her dragon. "It's in Ohio. We'll fly low since it's dark. Will that help?"

 _Yes,_ the dragon replied. Linnae sensed Elsa's unease, and she wished she could do something that would help. But she couldn't think of anything, so she just flew faster.

 _I can't speak to you verbally if we're going this fast._ Elsa sent the ice dragon a message mentally, not comfortable with flying at this speed. What if they missed the city entirely? Elsa felt Kai hold her more tightly, and she thought he was probably more frightened than she was. At least she was used to flying in the first place…

Truthfully, Kai wasn't particularly disturbed with the whole thing; he was far more worried that he wouldn't be able to protect Elsa. Without using her magic, Elsa was just a young girl, and it made Kai feel responsible for her. Sure, Elsa had a gun in her purse, but deep inside Kai knew she wouldn't want to use it even if she had just cause.

Elsa sensed that they had reached the U.S. side of the lake not too long after that. This wasn't the same part of the Ohio shoreline that she'd seen before, though-there was no amusement park with lit-up rides to greet her. It was just dark. _Linnae, can you echolocate?_ Elsa mentally asked her dragon. _Maybe that will help find the car seller's house. I showed you the picture of what the house looks like, remember?_

Linnae nodded and sent her reply: _Yes. I figured that out from a bat I saw once. There are houses nearby. Do you want me to fly lower?_

 _Yes, please._ Elsa sighed in relief. Even if it took several tries, they'd be able to find the house before the time Diane had set up the meeting time for them.

Within an hour, Linnae had managed to locate the correct house, and Elsa hugged her created guardian as tightly as she could once the dragon had landed them in a dark and shadowy clump of trees in the seller's yard. "Thank you, Linnae. Now you've got to fly away from here as fast as possible. Go to Corona and find my cousin. I'll be in touch." Elsa smiled a bit and nodded when Linnae hesitated. "Go on, Linnae. You've got to leave-you'll give me away."

The dragon nodded and nuzzled Elsa's shoulder before flying off.

"Come on, Miss Elsa. You're Nicolette now," Kai said quietly. "Let's go. I don't know if this neighborhood is all that nice, and I don't know how safe it is."

* * *

Elsa was delighted to find out that the seller was just an older couple who were just selling their old car because they needed the money. No weird creepy mean people at all.

While the lady's husband took care of the business part, the lady began taking an interest in Elsa and just talking to her. "Are you his daughter?" the lady asked in a friendly voice. "You seem…familiar somehow. Can't be, though. I know I've never seen you before. What's your name?"

Elsa looked to Kai for help, but he was still talking with the lady's husband about the car and hadn't heard. She finally just nodded and didn't say anything aloud. _Kai, please hurry up. I don't like this. This lady probably_ has _seen me before-in that moving picture thing! She might have grandchildren she watched it with or something._ "N…Nicolette," she said eventually. The stammer had _not_ been on purpose, and Elsa wanted to smack herself for it.

"How old are you? Fourteen or so?" the lady asked.

Elsa's cheeks turned pink at that; she felt embarrassed even though that meant her 'disguise' and her acting-that-wasn't-entirely-acting was working. She nodded again, feeling bad for lying to this nice lady. The lady sort of reminded her of Gerda…just a bit more nosy.

The lady put a gentle hand on Elsa's arm, and Elsa flinched, worried the lady would realize Elsa's skin was naturally cooler than a normal person's. "You seem shy. You should be more sure of yourself; you're a sweet young lady," the lady informed Elsa matter-of-factly. "Wait here. I'll be right back."

Elsa watched Kai and the lady's husband (his name was Henry), wishing they would hurry up. How long did it take to buy a car?! Didn't Kai just need to pay the cash and then that was it? She was still thinking that over when the lady came back and draped a light denim jacket over her shoulders. Elsa looked at the lady quizzically, not understanding why the lady would give her something.

"My granddaughter grew out of it. You can have it, honey. You're so cold!" the lady said in concern.

"Thank you," Elsa replied. Of course, she wasn't cold in the least, but it made her happy to know that there was at least one person here that was kind to strangers. This lady didn't owe her anything.

"Your accent is adorable, although I can't quite place it," the lady said now.

Elsa's face turned red. _Elsa, this is why you need to keep your mouth shut! What are you going to say now?_ Luckily Kai came over and just said, "Come along, Nicolette, it's time to go." Elsa sighed in relief and followed Kai over to the car.

Kai opened the door for Elsa on the passenger side, and Elsa climbed in slightly awkwardly. He quickly put Elsa's hand on the lever that moved the seat back and forth, knowing Elsa needed to move it back to make room for her braced leg. _Elsa, please understand. I can't say anything else that makes us look unknowledgeable about cars._

But Elsa _did_ understand, at least after a quick experimentation with said lever. She quickly shut the door and found the lock. _Thanks, Kai. I hadn't thought of the possibility my stupid leg might get in the way._

* * *

The second they were out on the road, Elsa pulled out the directions to the motel. Kai looked very worried as he took the first turn according to the directions. "Miss Elsa, I got the man we bought this from to explain how to drive by claiming my previous car worked differently, but I still am not entirely sure what I'm doing. You are going to have to watch the street signs and help watch for…for traffic." Kai's voice was tense. Since it was nighttime, there weren't many people on the roads, but somehow he was sure that there would be more once they got on the 'interstate' thing.

"I could help drive," Elsa offered. "I've driven before. My ice-car I made."

"You can't, Miss Elsa. I heard you tell that lady you were almost fifteen, and that's too young. Evidently you have to be sixteen to drive here. Besides, neither of us have a driver's license, which I've deduced is another thing you're supposed to have, too. If we get stopped, I don't want you to be the one that gets in trouble." Kai's voice was tense as he carefully took the exit Elsa pointed out from the directions.

Elsa sighed. "We're almost there. I see the sign for the motel from here," she said quietly, pointing at the sign. Right now she just wanted to lie down and curl up in a ball. This vehicle wasn't smooth like her ice-car had been; she didn't feel safe riding in it. Other cars zoomed past, and she flinched. "Kai, I don't like this," Elsa admitted. _Elsa, shut up. Kai has enough to worry about already without you freaking out._

"I don't like it any more than you do, Miss Elsa. We should be able to go home tomorrow evening," Kai reminded her. He instinctively beeped the car's horn back when another vehicle cut in front of them. "All right, we're here."

* * *

Inside the motel, Elsa eyed the newspapers stacked in a pile on a table while Kai got the key to the room. She frowned when she read a few of the headlines. Somebody had committed a mass shooting and there was another article debating the pros and cons of stricter gun laws. _I'm supposed to have a gun permit. If anyone finds what's in my bag…_ Elsa understood the _motive_ behind the idea of stricter gun laws, but she did not think that would help. If someone was going to go hurt someone, they would find a way to do it, law or no law, right? She decided she would ask Kai about it and see what he thought. Maybe she was just being stupid.

"Aren't you a bit young to be out of school already? Schools haven't let out for the summer yet," the sour-looking woman behind the counter asked, slightly accusingly in Elsa's opinion.

Elsa was still thinking over whether she should reply or not when Kai said without even looking up from the form he was filling out, "She has her schooling at home."

"Oh, a homeschooler. What for?"

Kai put the pen down and looked the woman in the face. "There were people picking on her because of her leg. Could you please leave her be? The key, if you please." Kai's voice said in no uncertain terms that he was not going to put up with any more nosy questions about his "daughter".

The woman made a face that Elsa immediately read as meaning that she thought Elsa was some poor little thing that needed to be fixed or treated differently. "I'm so sorry," she said a slightly patronizing tone of voice. "Let us know if she needs any different accommodations."

Elsa wished she could dump a pile of snow on the woman's head, but she merely scowled and said nothing. _What's wrong with having lessons at home? I grew up 'homeschooled'. And Nicolette_ and _real-me don't need to be treated differently. That's not fair._

Kai didn't want to make a scene, so he just snatched the room card key from the counter and handed it to Elsa, ignoring the woman altogether. "Come on, we'll find the room ourselves," he said to Elsa. "I think it's on the second floor."

They found the elevator easily, and Kai frowned as he watched Elsa's irritated expression disappear. Now she just looked upset. "There are people like that everywhere, Miss E-"

Elsa's head shot up from where she had been staring at her feet. "Not now! Explain later," she muttered under her breath. _Ms. Diane told me there would be security moving picture camera things in most places. I don't think there's one in here, but I don't know, and I don't want us to risk it._

Once they had found the room and locked the door, Elsa sighed in relief. Ms. Diane had also told her there wouldn't be any moving picture things watching in a motel room, and she felt much more comfortable now. The idea of mechanical "eyes" watching her made her feel squirmy and uncomfortable. _Kai and I managed to buy a cheap vehicle and find the motel,_ she 'said' to Linnae.

A few seconds passed before Linnae's reply came. _I am still flying over Lake Erie, Elsa. The water looks pretty at night. Do I_ have _to go to Corona?_

Elsa sighed in frustration. _Linnae, you are an important part of this plan! Your job is to go to Corona, find Rapunzel, and tell her what's going on. You need to be there before sunrise!_ she retorted. "Linnae is just flying around over Lake Erie right now!" Elsa vented to Kai a moment later. "I told her to go to Corona!"

"I think your ice dragon has an independent fun-loving streak, much like you do," Kai told her. "And she may not understand how serious the situation is in general. Miss Elsa, since she can't communicate with anyone besides you and Rapunzel, it'll be safe to tell her what's going on."

"But I _did_ tell her," Elsa countered. She sighed in relief when Linnae's peeved message came a minute later, _I am almost to Corona. I will send you another message whenever I find your cousin._ "Linnae's almost there now," Elsa reported. "She says she'll send another message when she finds Rapunzel."

"I wouldn't expect a reply until morning then, Miss Elsa. Your cousin is probably asleep." Kai frowned when Elsa began tinkering with the heating-cooling unit mounted below the window in the room and cold air came blasting out-set at 56 degrees to be exact, the lowest it would go. "Miss Elsa, I agree that it's warm in here, but it's going to be freezing in here if you leave that thing set like that." Even all the way across the room, Kai could feel the chilly air from the air conditioning.

Elsa huffed a moment later as she felt the air coming out of the strange device. "That air is not fifty-six degrees like it says it is! It's over sixty! Sixty-one, to be exact." She turned the whole thing off entirely and set the room at sixty-five degrees herself, figuring that would be comfortably cool for her and not _too_ cold for Kai.

Kai held back a chuckle. _It figures that Elsa's internal thermometer is more accurate than that weird machine._ "Miss Elsa, it feels fine, but I'm not sure you altering the temperature is a good idea. It would be stuffy in here with that strange device off if you hadn't cooled it down. Maybe set that thing on sixty-one or so, so it'll be around sixty-five in here. I know you like it cool indoors." Since Elsa had learned the key to controlling her powers just over ten months before, Kai had noticed that the castle had mysteriously-or rather not so mysteriously since everyone knew why-become comfortable even when it was sweltering outdoors.

Elsa obliged, but the inaccurate readings from the machine still annoyed her. She peeked out the window and suddenly whipped around to face Kai. "We have a problem. It's supposed to rain hard tomorrow," she said flatly. _I can feel it. And I bet I didn't sense this before because one, I wasn't trying to, and two, because we're a long ways from home and I have a limit to my 'prediction range'…especially since it's not even like there's a hurricane coming or something, just lots and lots of rain._

"Why should that matter, Miss Elsa?"

Elsa stared at him. "Well, if you don't have a problem driving in the rain tomorrow, everything's fine," she deadpanned. She climbed on the bed closest to the air conditioner, knowing Kai wouldn't want that one anyway, and just crawled under the covers. _I want to go home._

Kai debated on trying to talk to Elsa more, but decided to leave her be, knowing she was probably just already homesick and there was nothing he could do about that. They would just have to deal with the rain and be extra careful driving that car.

* * *

Early the next morning, Elsa woke up to the sound of rain drumming against the window. Usually she liked that sound, but at the moment it just worried her. Across the room, she could see that Kai was still asleep, and she decided she would go downstairs on her own and bring Kai back breakfast from the 'continental breakfast' thing in the lobby. That would be a good surprise since he was going through so much trouble to help her get information she needed. Just in case, she scribbled down a short note that said what she was doing; that way Kai wouldn't start worrying if he awoke before she came back.

After getting ready, she headed downstairs as quickly as she could. Getting the food was no problem; Elsa just chose two sweet pastries for herself and three for Kai, two bowls of funny-looking colored cereal labeled 'Froot Loops', and two cups of apple juice. She was carefully carrying the food back towards the elevator when someone bumped right into her. "Sorry," Elsa said to whoever it was, even though she was _positive_ it hadn't been her fault. _At least I didn't drop or spill anything._

"Watch where you're going! You bumped into my friend here," a boy said. Elsa thought he was probably about the same age as her cover character Nicolette.

"I said sorry. Excuse me," Elsa said quietly, not wanting to attract any attention. This whole venture relied on remaining invisible. Getting into a verbal fight was _not_ remaining invisible, and it risked someone identifying her accent.

The other boy pushed her, but this time she was expecting it, so it still didn't really matter. "Got some money? We need some candy from the vending machine."

Elsa frowned. "No," she said, although she had a _lot_ of it in her pocket. She'd decided to put half in her pocket and leave the other half in her big purse as a precaution in case this sort of thing happened. "Go get your own candy. I need to go."

"You pushed me!"

"I did _not_! You pushed me. Go away or I'll call for the manager," Elsa retorted, spotting the person in question a ways down the hall. At least, Elsa _assumed_ she was the manager; it was the same sour woman from the night before. _I didn't like how she treated me, but if she thinks I'm helpless, then she'll also make these idiots go away._ Sure enough, without having to say a word, the manager strode down the hall and grabbed both boys' arms.

"You should be ashamed of yourselves! You should be on your way to school by now, not terrorizing my patrons!" the woman scolded. "I do apologize, miss," she added once the boys were gone. "Those were just my son and his friend…they would have done it to anyone near their age, although you being…"

Elsa followed the woman's gaze to her braced leg and made a face.

The woman knew Elsa understood, so she just said, "Yes, that. It made you more of a target because they thought you wouldn't do anything. Come here, I have something for you."

Elsa took a step backward. _Ms. Diane told me not to accept offers like that, that I could get myself in trouble._ She didn't think the woman was _mean_ , nor did she think the woman meant her any harm; but she still sensed that the woman thought there was something wrong with her that needed fixing and that immediately made Elsa consider her untrustworthy. "I can't. I don't know you."

To Elsa's surprise, the woman laughed instead of appearing offended. "Cynical little thing, aren't you? Well, go on back to your room and eat your breakfast. I'll be up there in a few minutes with a cart of books and you can pick one then. I like to give one to every kid or teenager that comes in here if my son bothers him or her. Are you adopted? From Europe, perhaps? I can't place your accent exactly, but it's definitely European."

Elsa smiled at that and nodded, but she didn't volunteer any other information. Although the woman suspected nothing, anything Elsa said would be treading far too close to the truth. _Maybe she was just grumpy last night? Or…I don't know. She still seems slightly sour and definitely prejudiced, but she's not mean._

* * *

Soon Elsa was safely back in the hotel room…met with a very worried Kai at the door. "Miss Elsa, please don't leave like that again. I'm supposed to be guarding you," he told her. "But thank you for bringing the breakfast."

"The lady from the lobby last night stopped her son and his friend from picking on me," Elsa reported. "She said she's coming up here with a book cart and that I could have one." She tilted her head to one side, considering what the woman had said. "I _know_ she's not mean, but I think she's a little prejudiced or something, maybe."

Kai sighed. "You had to talk to her, I assume?"

"Just a little. She thinks you adopted me from somewhere in Europe, but she didn't know where. I didn't explain anything," Elsa said truthfully. She plopped back on her bed and popped a piece of the weird cereal in her mouth. "Froot Loops are disgustingly tasty," she quipped.

When the lady knocked in the door less than five minutes later, Kai opened the door. "Nicolette, you're supposed to come choose your book," he called to Elsa, who was just standing in front of the window watching the rain.

Elsa was actually happy to pick a book; she loved reading. In fact, she had no idea what to pick. A book about a valkyrie caught her eye, but she decided not to pick that one since choosing a book about Norse mythology might make the woman think she knew where Elsa was from…and she'd be half right. After a few minutes' deliberation, she picked a book about different architectural wonders around the world. That sounded interesting, and it was paperback, so it wouldn't take up a ton of room in her things. "Thank you very much," she said, hugging the book to her chest.

"You are quite welcome. Are you sure you want that one?" the woman asked, honestly more than a little surprised at 'Nicolette's' choice.

Kai smiled. "She loves architecture and engineering. Quite good at drawing blueprints, too," he said. Elsa had, after all, started drawing blueprints when she was years younger than her cover character's age, so that wasn't ridiculous in Kai's mind.

But the woman's eyes just grew big. "She draws blueprints at her age?! She can't be more than fifteen or sixteen _at most_!"

"I study a lot," Elsa said quickly. _Kids here must not have as difficult schooling as Anna and I did, that's all._

* * *

It was a short distance to the bookstore, but Kai was having a lot of trouble navigating the car through the pouring down rain. They took three wrong turns and ended up back at the hotel. Elsa sighed and closed her eyes. "If I just moved this stupid rain…" She hated meddling with natural weather anyway, but not only that, she _would_ be found out if she did that. Rain would not turn into a blizzard and then move away naturally. Linnae sent her the much-awaited message that she'd found Rapunzel and told her what was happening, and Elsa reported that to Kai.

"Thank goodness. At least that's going well," Kai said flatly. "Come on, Miss Elsa, let's try again."

They finally found the bookstore about twenty minutes later. Elsa grinned when she reached under the seat and found an umbrella that must have originally belonged to the elderly couple that had sold them the car. "Well, at least we won't get soaking wet walking in," she quipped.

Two hours later, Kai and Elsa walked out of the bookstore with a bag full of books on the subjects Elsa needed, on the pretense that Kai was a professor needing materials for his classes. Elsa was also happy because they had had plenty of extra money left over and she had chosen a book for Anna, along with ones for Nikoleta, Eliot, and Anikka. There were so many books in that store that Elsa had never seen in her life; it had been hard for her to pick. Sure, Elsa had access to a large library at home, but there were still many, many books that she didn't even know existed. "I think the bookstore is one thing I really, really like about this country," she told Kai once they were back in the car. "I could have spent all day in there."

"I'm sure you could have, Miss Elsa. We could go back in there this afternoon after we get ourselves some lunch, maybe. I see a pizza place next door to the bookstore…does that sound all right to you?" Kai suggested. Something told him they should save the food they had brought from home if at all possible…just in case. Everything was going too well, despite the issues with the rain.

Elsa nodded. "Do you mind plain cheese?"

* * *

IN CORONA…

"Hey, Blondie, you need to make that crazy creature stay here!" Eugene exclaimed. He knew _exactly_ where the ice dragon had come from-Rapunzel's cousin Elsa-but he still thought Linnae was crazy. Rapunzel had told him what Linnae had told her, and his first thought was that Linnae _had_ to stay away from the water when it was daylight.

Rapunzel knew Eugene was right, but she didn't know how to order Linnae to stay put, or even if she could. The dragon seemed obsessed with flying over the water, and while Rapunzel thought that was probably safe as long as Linnae stayed nearby…it was _not_ safe to go way out over open water. "Linnae, come back!" she yelled.

 _I do not want to! Elsa just said I had to deliver the message! I shall be back later,_ Linnae told Rapunzel.

"If Elsa didn't expressly tell you to stay here, she probably assumed you'd be smart enough to do so!" Rapunzel shouted back. _I wish I knew how to send you messages telepathically so I don't have to yell at you, you crazy dragon,_ she thought.

 _You just sent me one. I am NOT a crazy dragon!_ Linnae retorted instantly.

Rapunzel sighed. At least she had figured out one thing…right?

"She's not going to come back. Maybe she only obeys orders from Miss Icy," Eugene said quietly, giving Rapunzel a hug.

"When are you going to start calling my cousin 'Elsa' instead of 'Miss Icy'?"

* * *

Back in the United States, Elsa and Kai finished up their pizza late lunch. "Let's just start making our way back towards the coast," Elsa suggested once they were back in the car. "Being along the coastline should make it easier for Linnae to find us tonight in the pouring rain."

Kai nodded. "Sounds like a very good plan to me. Please just continue doing what you've been doing, Miss Elsa, watching for traffic and the like. It's raining even harder now."

"We need to head north," Elsa commented, half to herself and half to Kai. _What if Linnae can't find us? What if we get caught before we can leave tonight…?_ She didn't voice her concerns, unwilling to worry Kai more. He already looked tense.

A while later, Elsa was just asking, "Kai, what are we going to do with the car when Lin-" when everything seemed to suddenly slow down. A wave of water washed over the windshield, and Elsa screamed as she saw a huge eighteen-wheeler truck barreling toward them, its tires squealing as it tried to slow down. _If that hits us, we're dead,_ she thought. "The ditch, run us in the ditch!" she shouted. That would be safer than getting hit by that giant thing, wasn't it?

The car stalled in the water after sliding sideways and wouldn't move.

The giant truck flashed in front of them.

Elsa heard glass shattering and Kai shouting that he was sorry, and then felt their little car being flipped over and over. Instinctively she clutched the books and her bag on her lap and flung her other arm in front of Kai protectively. _One, two…three…and a half,_ she found herself thinking. _I should not use my magic, either._

She heard sickening scraping, scratching, and cracking noises, and then she felt a sharp pain in her head.

Elsa's last thought was, _I am inexplicably upside down?_

 **A/N: Um...that happened. Yeah. But they'll be okay.:) I figured something like that would _have_ to happen sooner or later with neither Kai nor Elsa knowing much about driving a car, and all the water wasn't helpful, either.**

 **Next chapter coming soon!**

 **P.S. On a side note...happy birthday, Elsa! :) ("My" Elsa's birthday is/was July 2.:)) (And yes, it's still a month and a half ish before Elsa's birthday in the story.)**


	22. Chapter 22

**A/N: Thanks to everyone who's followed/favorited and/or is reading but not reviewing:)**

 **Olivia O'Neil-Well, no promises beyond that Elsa is mostly okay. She's just scraped up and pretty shaken. (After all, she's not used to traveling in a regular car in the first place anyways.:/) They'll be fine:)**

 **Elsa Tomago-It IS impossible-that's part of the reason they got in an accident in the first place, like you pointed out!:P No matter how careful they were, something was bound to happen. I figured Kai's reaction to the lady's questions and the lady's reaction towards Elsa were believable...and I agree, the lady should punish her son, but they weren't important characters, really.:P The books are not ruined, although they're kind of bent up and the like (Elsa has managed to hang on to them since they were in the bag). :)**

 **FluffyKitten-Lol, good prediction.:P Same here. I've actually been in more than one (not as the driver, thank you very much, lolXD), but they weren't nearly as bad as the one Kai and Elsa ended up in. Anyways. They're mostly okay:) The dumb kids figured Elsa wouldn't do anything, so they acted like that.:/ Lol, honestly I kind of took the idea that Elsa looks younger than her age from the movie itself...grown-up Elsa just plain does _not_ look 21, especially when she smiles. She makes the same expressions her 8-year-old self does.:P Anna does too, for that matter, but it's not as obvious. Yep, I ALWAYS thought Elsa's birthday was in July (in the movie Oaken says 'A real howler in July' and Elsa's coronation is supposed to be when she turns 21. Therefore her birthday must be in the summer.) Okay, and I thought the whole winter solstice thing was so cliché, so...nope. The Snow Queen's birthday is in the summer.:) You're welcome, and thank you:) I've had lots of favorite characters, but never one like Elsa.:)**

 **raven678-Well, here's the next chapter:) And thank you:)**

 **moohamquest-They'll be fine:) Well...their disguise isn't entirely busted; it depends on who exactly discovers them and who sees them after that.:)**

 **orang biasa-Lol, Elsa likes tinkering with mechanical things she hasn't seen before, so the AC unit was interesting to her. (And she was miffed that its temperature labels weren't accurate.;) Argh, that drives ME crazy, and I certainly can't perceive exact temperatures like Elsa can.:P) You have a very good point, and that is why an accident happened. Someone could drive a car with verbal instructions, but it sure wouldn't be safe! I completely agree-and no, they don't have cars in Arendelle.:P Thank you:)**

 **Mandy-That's okay:) I don't think that's rude at all; it's an opinion and honest opinions and criticisms are good. And you don't sound selfish either. I mean...I do always write a happy ending, but then I make the characters get into all kinds of trouble all over again.:P One reason this story probably came off like that was because I purposely wanted the beginning/first bunch of chapters to be more about Elsa's thoughts and feelings rather than a big action plot. I realized I'd kind of tossed her into so many bad situations that there was just no way she'd be remotely okay inside, especially considering that she hadn't had enough time to heal from the way she was treated as a child, really. She doesn't know how to handle emotions very well, so they go every which way when she doesn't try to keep them all inside. Having her parents back didn't help, either. Yes, Elsa has now gotten herself into a pickle again, but Anna is not being threatened or being forced to hurt her (Anna's safe at home in Arendelle!:P), so Elsa will be fine inside. Well, yes, she may end up in the hospital, but that doesn't necessarily mean trouble. It depends on just who finds her and Kai.:) Wait and see:) Just remember that this time the action plot is meant to help Elsa get better inside just as much as it is to advance the story (ie., being willing to defend herself, etc). :) Well...yes:P I suppose that's a spoiler, lol...:) Don't apologize for that. You're right, I do like to make everything as realistic as possible-hence why everyone in the U.S. doesn't automatically love her-but I still like a happy ending. I guess I kind of like the idea of someone like Elsa, who's not perfect or strong all the time (although she can be), carrying the story, that's all. She makes _me_ feel better.:) Lol, more about Anna being 'like Elsa' later.:)**

 **On to the story!**

Kai just closed his eyes and took several deep breaths once everything had stopped tumbling around him. He felt shaken, his knee hurt, and he was upside down, but otherwise he was fine. _Elsa! Is Elsa all right?_ Kai could already tell Elsa's side of the car had taken the brunt of the impact, and he wanted to know if she was all right. "Miss Elsa? Can you answer me?"

When Elsa didn't reply, Kai nearly panicked. He was supposed to protect the young queen, not get her in a car accident. Maybe the accident was his fault…after all, he had never driven a car before he had come here. A quick explanation of how to drive had not been enough; no wonder this had happened. And yet…something told him that it had _not_ been his fault-at least not mostly-or the giant truck's driver's fault, either, really. It was the rain. _I have to get Elsa and myself out of here and away from the scene before the police discover us._ With that thought, Kai struggled out of his seatbelt and crawled out of the shattered window on his side, only to discover that the only thing holding up the roof of the car was a column of ice. _Elsa kept us from being crushed to death!_ There was also soft powdery snow on Elsa's side of the car, as if she'd instinctively made something that would partially protect her and yet melt, thus dissolving any evidence that it had been there.

Making his way around to Elsa's side of the car, Kai noticed that the huge truck was gone…and that there was no way he could get Elsa out that way. Most of the passenger side of the car was smashed beyond repair. And he could smell something burning, despite the pouring rain. _The gasoline! If it's like kerosene, it's highly flammable!_ He had to get Elsa out of there, and fast. If Elsa was hurt like he thought she was, dragging her out the driver's side would probably hurt her worse, but that was better than leaving her stuck in there. Kai immediately returned to the shattered driver's window, freed Elsa from her seatbelt, and quickly tugged her free. "I'm sorry, Miss Elsa, but we've got to get away from here," he said quietly. She was still clutching the books and her bag in one arm, and it made her much heavier than she should have been.

There was no time to check if Elsa was okay, although Kai already knew that she definitely wasn't-there was a nasty cut on her temple and her left wrist didn't look quite right. Kai had no idea where else she might be hurt. "Miss Elsa, we're going across the ditch into the woods," Kai told her, not particularly expecting an answer. He groaned as his injured knee nearly collapsed under him. _I just have to get Elsa to the woods. I just have to get Elsa to the woods._

"It hurts," Elsa mumbled, not entirely sure what was going on. "Wha…what…happened…?" She flinched as she heard an explosion that flung both her and Kai to the ground. _Accident…our car got hit. Don't let go of the books,_ Elsa thought absently. She tried to sit up, but opening her eyes made her dizzy and the wet world around her seemed to be spinning. Where was Kai? Was he okay? The wet pavement smelled funny. _I'm squishing my arm, and it hurts,_ she thought. She felt Kai picking her up again, and the movement made her pass out again.

Kai managed to get himself and Elsa across the ditch and hidden under a very, very large bush just out of sight before collapsing. At least the huge bush kept them from getting rained on, at least mostly.

Elsa just lay still where Kai had dropped her, sensing that wherever she was, she was mostly safe now. _I want to go home. And I feel like I'm not breathing right. I'm scared…_ She thought she heard Kai's fatherly voice asking her where it hurt, and she slowly opened her eyes; then promptly let them close again. "All…over. My head…mostly," she mumbled truthfully. "I'm scared…feel like…can't breathe right." Elsa was certain that most of the trouble was that she felt shaken up all over. Maybe once she was still for a little while, she would feel better. "'Mergency stuff…in purse bag thing," she added.

 _All right, let's check Elsa's head first, then,_ Kai thought to himself. Whatever he did, he could not panic. They were stuck in a foreign country with only two days' worth of food for one person and Elsa was barely conscious. Once he had tended to Elsa as best he could, they needed to get further away from the street before someone found them. _We only have to last until tonight. Then Elsa's ice dragon can get us home,_ he reminded himself. Kai found the ''mergency stuff' where Elsa said it was and instantly felt somewhat better. Elsa's head couldn't be too badly hurt; she was communicating and her mind was obviously intact. The worst thing that could be wrong was that she had a concussion along with the cut on her temple and a smaller one on her lip. Kai gently pressed a bandage to the cut on Elsa's temple and frowned when a tear trickled down her cheek. "Miss Elsa, what's the matter?" he asked quietly.

Elsa's blue eyes flickered open. "Failed…mission…I…I lost…the books. Stuck here…pointless…no reason…" She was still struggling to breathe and that made it hard to talk. _Elsa, don't panic any more. It'll just make it worse… I'm scared._

"You did not lose the books, Miss Elsa," Kai informed her. "I don't know how you did it, but you managed to hang on to both that heavy bag of books and your big purse. The only thing we lost was my bag. I was too concerned with getting you out of that wrecked car before it exploded."

Elsa smiled a bit at that. "That…wasn't my…imagination?" _The books are safe. Good. That means we didn't totally fail. But we lost some of our money and whatever Kai brought with him…_

"No. The whole car exploded." Kai tried his best not to look worried as he glanced at Elsa's left wrist. Even without touching it at all, he was pretty sure something was broken. _That happened because she was trying to protect me, I know that's why. If it was from her side of the car being smashed, it'd be her other arm…_ "Miss Elsa, I need you to hold this," he said, guiding her good hand to the bandage pressed to the cut on her temple. "I don't want to tape it in place or anything until the bleeding is stopped. Can you breathe ok?"

"I…I don't know." Elsa thought for a moment and then began struggling to sit up, which made another wave of pain and dizziness go through her head. "Kai…if I'm…if I'm hurt, then you must be too. Take care of yourself first," she ordered. "I don't want to be a bother."

"I will not do any such thing, Miss Elsa. Your side of the car took most of the impact, and you did something to your arm flinging it out to protect me like you did. You just lay still." Kai was actually very relieved that Elsa was speaking better now, even if that meant she would start rejecting help because she 'didn't want to be a bother'. _Why is she saying she's not sure if she can breathe right? What's wrong?_

Elsa started biting her lip, which made it start bleeding again. "Are you okay?" she asked hopefully. _I'm going to send Linnae a message so she'll know what's going on._

Kai continued checking Elsa's wrist, unsure what he could do for it that wouldn't just injure it further. He wished he could just take her to a hospital, but he didn't dare. _Maybe they would be willing not to turn her in if they actually talked to her? No, we can't risk that._ He jumped when Elsa suddenly bolted upright, her eyes wide in fright. "What's the matter?"

Elsa shook her head and nearly passed out again. "Something…something's wrong. I just sent…Linnae…a message saying we wrecked the car and we were…hidden in some woods. She…she started to reply, but…Kai, I think something or…someone hurt her or something," she said worriedly.

"What did Linnae tell you?" Kai asked, gently helping Elsa lay back down again. "Miss Elsa, please just lay still. I don't want you risking hurting yourself worse. And just talk as little as possible. Give me a short version, not word for word."

"Linnae was flying around over Lake Erie…I said not t'do that…she started to say she'd be here tonight…something cut the message off. And Linnae…didn't do it. I _know_ she didn't," Elsa said. "She called for help before…before the message stopped…she sounded a little frightened." Her eyes grew even more panicked when she saw three pairs of feet walking toward them. "Kai, I-"

"I thought I heard voices from over here," a concerned but friendly male voice said. "We were checking for survivors in that wreckage on the road to see if they needed any medical help or go to the hospital…didn't think there were any, but I think we just found them." He narrowed his eyes slightly at Elsa in recognition. _I know who that girl is. She matches the appearance and I found that little column of ice intact in the wreckage of that car…_ The young EMT had tossed the ice into the ditch and let it run off in the water before anyone else had seen it, hoping that if his suspicion was right, it would hide the maker of it.

Elsa flinched, not wanting this stranger to touch her or take her to a hospital or anywhere else. She just wanted to go home. Kai hesitated, absolutely sure that this person knew who Elsa was. If he turned down obviously-needed help, that would be just as bad as accepting help and risking others finding out about her. _I think he's the only one of the three who knows, so maybe if I can talk to him alone, I can tell him not to say anything._ With that thought, Kai struggled to his feet and stood protectively in front of Elsa, trying not to put any weight on his sore knee. _What am I supposed to do?_

The one that had recognized Elsa immediately realized the problem. "I don't care who you two are. Our job is to help people, not judge identities," he said carefully, hoping that would be enough to ease Kai's mind regarding Elsa. "My name is Timothy."

 _That was Anikka's big brother's name_ , Elsa thought to herself. Inexplicably that helped her relax and not let any ice or snowflakes out. She looked at the other two unfamiliar faces above her warily, still not wanting anyone she didn't know touching her. Elsa's mind was still spinning, and she didn't trust herself to get up on her own; the very thought made her feel like throwing up. She said nothing, figuring that that wasn't a rude or ridiculous reaction since she was hurt…right? _I've got to get a message to Anna somehow. I have to. And I need to figure out what happened to Linnae._ Elsa let her eyes close so she could think more easily. Kai would protect their books; she knew he would. In any event, she was very sure injured people did not lug heavy bags of books to the hospital with them, so she couldn't take care of them herself anyway. _Linnae, can you tell me what happened to you?_ she 'asked' the dragon.

There was no reply.

Elsa's blue eyes shot open when she heard an unfamiliar voice whisper her name-her _real_ name-in her ear a second later. "Elsa. Queen Elsa, I know who you are. We're not going to hurt you. You're safe." Then, in a louder voice, "Can you understand me?" Elsa nodded slightly, sensing that this was the only one of the strangers that recognized her, and let her eyes drift shut again.

Kai stood a bit off to the side holding the books and Elsa's 'purse bag thing'. A quick conversation with this Timothy guy had satisfied Kai's worry that Elsa would end up in trouble (he had sounded a bit like an innocently obsessed fan in Kai's opinion, to be honest…); now the only issue was making sure Elsa wouldn't be discovered at the hospital somehow. _He said most people at the hospital he works at aren't against Elsa; they just think she doesn't really have powers or may not even exist. So as long as Elsa doesn't make any mistakes, it'll be fine. It's just…Elsa's natural body temperature is different…what if…?_ Kai was still very concerned about Elsa genuinely being all right, and he had managed to get permission to ride in the ambulance with her, so at least she wouldn't be alone.

Elsa kept her eyes closed and she clutched Kai's hand tightly, but otherwise she seemed calm enough. Inside she was deathly nervous. She'd taken one look at the inside of the ambulance and instantly scrunched her eyes shut, not recognizing any of the things in it. _I want to go home. What if Linnae's hurt? What if someone hurt Linnae and she was with Rapunzel? And I'm useless right now. I feel dizzy and sick and I'm hurt. Kai never told me whether he was really okay or not. Is he all right?_ Elsa flinched when she felt a sharp pinch in her arm and then yelped and began struggling when she felt something on her neck. Whatever it was, she wanted it _off._

A streak of blue from Elsa's good hand flashed, and everyone screamed except Kai, who sighed and tried to catch Elsa's eyes before she completely panicked. "They don't know if your neck and back are all right-they're trying to help," he tried to reassure her.

 _Those parts of me are fine, though. I know they are. That doesn't make sense. I don't understand._ Elsa stopped struggling, but she still didn't feel safe. She'd just let loose a streak of magic and everyone had seen it. What would happen now? Where would these people take her and Kai? "I'm…sorry," she heard herself say. _Elsa, shut up. Why did you say that?!_

* * *

BACK IN ARENDELLE…

"Gerda, what time do you think Elsa and Kai will be back tonight?" Anna asked for the umpteenth time. "I…I miss her already. I know it's stupid and she's prob'ly fine, but…"

Gerda gave the princess a hug. "I don't know, Miss Anna. Most likely pretty late. They can't leave the United States until after dark and Linnae can't start looking for them until after dark, either. They'll be fine. Remember, the warning that something has gone wrong is if Linnae shows up sans your sister and Kai. Would you like me to make some cookies for you and Elsa and your friends to eat when they get back?"

Anna nodded eagerly. "Make your delicious boring plain super tasty chocolate chip ones! I love those! Please?"

Gerda laughed at that. "They're boring and plain yet super tasty and delicious?" she asked.

Anna nodded. "Yep!"

* * *

Once Elsa realized no one-at least not most-at the hospital wanted to hand her in anywhere or hurt her or anything else like that even once they knew who she was, she finally calmed down and just began feeling very curious about everything around her. That Timothy person had already made it clear to whoever was in charge that Elsa's real name was _not_ to be put on any paperwork, no matter what. So even though a bunch of people had quickly figured out she was Elsa from Arendelle, her records would still say she was just Nicolette. "We'll just need to sneak you out when it's time for you to be discharged," he explained. "I explained to Dr. Cook what's going on. I have to get back to work, but she'll take good care of you." Timothy was _very_ determined not to creep Elsa out by chattering about how good her movie was or that she was so pretty even though she was hurt at the moment or anything else like that. He was going to be professional.

Elsa wasn't sure what to say, so she let Kai reply for her. "Thank you. I believe we were lucky to run into you and your coworkers rather than…others," he said tactfully.

Timothy nodded and was almost immediately replaced by a friendly-looking middle-aged lady. "Hi, Nicolette," Dr. Cook greeted her; then whispered that she did know Elsa was…Elsa. "You picked a rather pretty pseudonym, I daresay," she added.

Elsa smiled at that. "One of my middle names is Nicoletta, and I have a friend named Nikoleta, not spelled the same," she said. Elsa realized that now that she was completely calm, she could breathe easily again, which made her feel better. Feeling like she couldn't breathe properly frightened her. "What's that tube thing for?" she asked, looking at her arm. "Is that what poked me on the way here?"

Dr. Cook was slightly taken aback at Elsa's questions, but then remembered this girl had probably never been to-or seen-a modern hospital in her life. No wonder Timothy had told her Elsa had been really frightened and might need help calming down. She probably hadn't understood anything that was happening to her. "That lets us give you medicine or blood or whatever other liquids your body might need. It's just an IV," she explained. _And luckily she doesn't need any blood because I have no idea if her body would reject 'normal' human blood…of any type…_ The first thing she'd noticed about Elsa's blood was the odd blue sparks in it. "Can you tell me what you remember from the car accident?"

"Well…I was just asking what we were going to do with the car when it was time to go home, and then there was a huge truck hurtling toward us. I heard glass shatter and I felt the car flip three and a half times. I remember thinking I wanted to protect Kai, and I think I put my arm out, maybe. I'm not sure. My head hurt and I blacked out. I remember I was upside down," Elsa said, trying to recall more details, but nothing else came to her. She couldn't remember the precise moment of impact, and most everything else was just a blur to her. All she could remember was the sound of the glass shattering and counting the times the car had flipped. _Why can't I remember anything else? Maybe there's nothing else to remember?_ "Oh, and I thought I imagined the car exploding, but Kai told me that was real," she added. "The wet pavement smelled funny."

Kai raised his eyebrows. "Well, I can't attest to the wet pavement 'smelling funny', but she's right. A big truck hit us and the car flipped. How she remembers exactly three and a half times I have no idea. The car stalled and slid sideways right before the crash. I do know E-Nicolette's side of the car took most of the impact. That's why she's hurt and I'm pretty much fine. That and she…did something to protect us, I'm not sure what." Kai was very sure that Elsa had to have done something besides putting the little ice column up to keep the car from crushing them. There was no other way to explain it.

Dr. Cook frowned. "I was told the accident had to do with all the water from the rain or something. There was no truck on scene at the accident. Did they just drive off?" She continued tending to Elsa as she talked.

"I don't know. I was too concentrated on getting Nicolette out of there before the car exploded," Kai said truthfully. "Is she going to be all right?"

"I believe so. We'll just take a few x-rays to check for any fractures and such. I'd like to keep her here overnight, though, just to keep an eye on her since she got knocked on the head pretty hard." Dr. Cook had already taken care of the nasty cut on Elsa's temple and the rest of the cuts and scrapes on her right arm and leg. _Elsa's blood looks normal on first glance, but those blue sparks in it…what if someone else sees that? And she's not freezing to the touch, but if she were an average human, she'd be unconscious from hypothermia or something…_ "And yes, I can bring back the x-rays so you can see them, Miss Nicolette," she added, anticipating Elsa's question.

"Just plain 'Nicolette' is fine," Elsa said quietly. _I wish I could just go by my real name…I don't even know why._

* * *

Not too long later, Elsa found herself in a small hospital room with one other patient, a little girl Elsa thought was probably nine or ten, maybe. Kai had gone downstairs to get some food (he'd been told Elsa would be brought hers); and Elsa somehow felt relieved to be on her own for a few minutes after all the events since leaving Arendelle less than twenty-four hours before. _I wish I had a way to contact Anna…_ She still felt sore all over, but she was absolutely sure she could get up if she tried, and she still didn't quite understand why Dr. Cook had said she had to stay here overnight. Something about watching her for symptoms for a more serious head injury than just that cut and a headache. (Elsa thought it might be simply because it would cause more trouble to bring her back if there was something wrong than to just stay put.) It had turned out she didn't have any broken bones, although her ribs were bruised, and her left wrist was badly sprained, not to mention the cuts and scrapes all over the right side of her. She fiddled with the velcro straps on the brace thing that had been put on her injured wrist to protect it. _Velcro would be useful for lots of things,_ she thought absently.

"There's only one TV in here," the little girl called. "Do you want to pick a channel? What do you like to watch? I'm nine. My name's Katie, and-" The girl gasped in delight when Elsa turned her head and she saw just who was in the room with her. There was no question in her mind who Elsa was, even if it made absolutely no sense why Elsa would be in the hospital with her. "I know you, Elsa! But I promise I won't tell. Grown-ups here are dumb. Do you like to be called 'Queen Elsa' or is 'Elsa' all right? You're awesome-you make me happy, and…yeah." She scowled, wondering who or what would have hurt Elsa enough that she had to stay in the hospital. "What happened to you, and why are you here in the U.S. anyways? I fell off my horse and broke my leg. He got scared of a silly old snake and bucked me off. I get to go home tomorrow, though."

Elsa's tired mind was scrambling as she tried to keep up with the little girl's rambling speech. _She's just excited. She doesn't want to hurt me,_ Elsa reminded herself. _She even knows not to tell any adults about me._ "Just plain Elsa is fine, and thank you for promising not to tell any adults about me. I'm here for…for queen business," Elsa said finally, "and there was a car accident. But I'm fine. They said I have to stay overnight because I hit my head, if I understand the reasoning right."

"Can I come sit with you?" Katie asked shyly. "I love your movie. You're awesome! You make me happy, too." _I already said that! Elsa's gonna think I'm dumb or something. Or I'll bother her…_

"I certainly don't mind in the least, but only if you're allowed to get up," Elsa replied, unsure if it was okay or not. She didn't understand why watching a movie about her would make Katie happy. At all. _Why would this child say something like that? She's never even met me…I don't understand._

Katie scowled. "I'm allowed to. It just hurts really, really bad," she said truthfully. She had been refusing to get up at all for a whole day, but she would if it meant she could sit with Elsa. In seconds, she was out of bed and wincing as Elsa helped her climb up on the other bed. "Can I tell you a secret?" she asked hopefully.

Elsa nodded and gave the little girl a reassuring smile. "I won't tell anyone. Cross my heart." Elsa's blue eyes filled with tears when Katie whispered her secret in Elsa's ear. _You're usually shy, but you forgot because you were bored and I made you feel safe enough to talk? And you're worried I won't like you because of that?_ She carefully put her arms around Katie and just hugged her close. "Shy is okay. I don't mind. You seem less shy than me, anyways," Elsa told the little girl.

Both girls jumped when the door slowly opened. "I have dinner for both of you, and-oh my goodness, you got her to get up!" the surprised nurse said to Elsa. "What did you do to get her up?"

Katie stuck out her tongue. "Hospital food is nasty," she informed Elsa. "But thanks for bringing it," she said to the nurse.

Elsa stifled a giggle. "I didn't do anything. Katie said she'd like to sit with me, and I said that was fine if she was allowed to get up." She winced as she accidentally pulled at her IV as she reached for her own dinner tray. Once her fascination with it had worn off, it had become annoying and she couldn't wait to be rid of it. _They said that was how they were giving me pain medicine, and if that's true, whatever the medicine is isn't making me loopy, so that's good. And…my head and my wrist still hurt, so it'd prob'ly be really bad otherwise…right?_ "Thank you for bringing us dinner."

"No problem. Just press the call button if you need anything else." The nurse turned back in alarm when she heard something start beeping wildly a second later. "What's the matter?! Are you all right?"

Elsa tilted her head to one side in confusion. "I think so? I feel exactly the same as I did a minute ago," she said honestly.

The nurse sighed once she had put two and two together and figured out what had happened. "You can't take that off. That measures your pulse," she told Elsa, clipping the little device back on Elsa's finger. "We're supposed to be checking on you periodically overnight. If you're still ok by lunchtime tomorrow, then we'll help you get home across the water. If not, you are safe here until you're healed enough to leave. I promise." She was one of the ones that knew Elsa was…Elsa now, and after seeing her in person, she was positive Elsa was no threat. What she didn't understand was why the girl was so cold compared to anyone else. It wasn't like she was freezing to touch, but her body was more than cool enough that she should have symptoms of severe hypothermia, which she most definitely did _not_. She couldn't possibly have ice powers…could she? Wasn't that just something that had been put into the movie to make a better fairy tale story? Still, there was something odd about her. Maybe she did have ice powers. Maybe that was why she had come out of what sounded like a horrible car crash pretty unscathed, all things considering.

"Thank you," Elsa said quietly. "Katie knows who I am already. She figured it out instantly," she added.

"Well then, I'll just say something flat out without any careful speaking. You _are_ safe here-the people that know you are, well, you, are not going to betray you. But there are still quite a few that don't know or don't believe it, so just…remember that, I suppose. A lot of people think you're a government hoax, and some are scared of you. I just wanted you to know, that's all. But you have a network of people here that want to help." She hesitated before adding, "That bag of books you have is dangerous. You're lucky I'm the only one who saw anything that was in it. If you _can_ magic something up to seal it shut, I suggest you do so. You would be better off discovered as Queen Elsa with a mysterious magically sealed bag than adopted Nicolette with those books in your possession. I'm sorry; you probably hear the magic thing all the time…you're probably sick of being a fairy tale character…"

Elsa just stared. _This lady knows I'm me, but she doesn't think I have ice powers! How can she not?!_

Katie's eyes sparkled with excitement. "Are dangerous books what you came here for?" she whispered in Elsa's ear. She was so, so excited to actually be _talking to Elsa_ and the fact that Elsa seemed to be there for some Official-Important-Secret-Queen-Business was very, very awesome in her mind.

 **A/N: So...yeah.:) Yes, Elsa has been discovered, but she's made several allies and a little friend, too. I wanted to show that not EVERYONE is going to cause trouble for her, just some.**

 **And yes, Linnae being naughty and not doing what Elsa said to do has caused trouble. :P**

 **Next chapter coming soon! (In which where Linnae is will be revealed and Elsa learns what a TV is and sees a movie...:) )**


	23. Chapter 23

**A/N: Thanks to everyone who's followed/favorited and/or is reading but not reviewing:)**

 **Mandy-As a matter of fact, that's exactly what Elsa is going to see:) You're welcome, but I actually like constructive criticism as long as it's not mean or flame-y, and yours was very nice.:) Elsa's okay (at least mostly). The hospital just scared her at first because she didn't understand what was going on.:/ Yep, very true-she does have allies now, but she still needs to be very careful. Same.:) (Although I'd probably get nervous and not have any idea what to say...) No, American Timothy is not Anikka's brother. He just has the same name.:) Wait and see:)**

 **FluffyKitten-Yes, but again, they weren't anything horrible like the one in the story. So yes, I just used my own reactions and just multiplied them by quite a bit.:P (Sorry, Elsa, Kai, I don't think there was any other logical way for you to react...:P) The good news is that Linnae isn't easily hurt-her scales are made of Elsa's impenetrable ice. Linnae's weakness is that internally, her body works pretty much like that of a natural animal, aside from being able to communicate with natural mages and being able to 'talk' verbally. Lol, I know what you mean-you're glad they aren't stuck in ICU or something.:) I kind of want to go eat a cookie now, lol...:P Same:) Thank you!:)**

 **Elsa Tomago-I didn't think it was remotely logical for no one to recognize her, if anything simply because her blood is slightly different and her natural body temperature is, too. I think Katie's lucky, too. Me too:) And yes, Elsa managed to save the books.:P**

 **Olivia O'Neil-Me too:) Well, I won't promise no one bad discovers her, but of course she'll get home.:)**

 **orang biasa-That's true-it was kind of a waste, but the car did at least help them get the books and stuff.:) She IS watching her movie, lol.:) I did not have Katie say that, but she's awfully thrilled to be around Elsa though. Thank you:)**

 **On to the story:)**

Elsa and Katie were eating their not-very-good dinner when Katie grabbed the TV remote and flicked the TV on. She figuratively froze when she saw what was on the news. "Um…Elsa? Has that got to do with you?" Katie asked, pointing a shaky finger at the TV screen. There on the news channel was something about a 'dangerous ice dragon captured'. There was no picture of said creature, which Katie found odd.

Elsa gasped and began biting her lip, which made it start bleeding again. "Why's there no picture of Linnae?" she whispered. "Did the moving picture thing hurt her or something?"

"Oh, no, Elsa! I don't know why there's no picture of your dragon, but…but a TV is just a 'moving picture thing' like a movie or a film, but it has channels. This is a news channel," Katie did her best to explain. She quickly flicked through several channels before going back to the news. "See, there are lots of shows and stuff you can watch. But…on the news, it looks like the thing about your dragon-what did you call her? Linnae?-is all that's on."

"What did they do to Linnae?" Elsa asked hesitantly. "What's so bad about her that they can't show her on the TV thing? What if she's hurt?" _Linnae, please answer! I'm just worried about you. I wish you had listened to me, but I'm not mad. At least not a lot,_ she sent Linnae another message. There was still no reply.

Katie grabbed a tissue off the nightstand and handed it to Elsa. "Your lip's bleeding," she said quietly. She couldn't help Elsa with her worried questions, but she could help make Elsa's lip feel better. She carefully gave the older girl a hug when she saw her obviously trying to hold back tears. "It'll be all right. Maybe the news people are faking it," Katie suggested hopefully.

Elsa shook her head. "No, I…Linnae won't answer me. She always answers, even if she doesn't listen to me. Something's wrong…" _What if Ms. Diane betrayed me? No one here saw Linnae, I know they didn't._ Elsa was a hundred percent sure something was very badly wrong. That truck had evidently just driven off after wrecking their car. What was that all about? Shouldn't whoever it was have stopped to see if they could help? What if she and Kai had been targeted somehow? Elsa's paranoid thoughts raced from likely possibilities to ridiculous ones. Maybe some weird machine had made their car stall and that made them wreck and… _Stop it, Elsa. This won't help. You have to think. You need to get in touch with Linnae somehow._

"You mean telepathically?" Katie asked curiously. When Elsa nodded, Katie grinned. "I got a simple solution. Maybe she's asleep and not receiving your messages!"

"Well…" Elsa's face lit up at that. She had forgotten all about how Linnae couldn't wake up unless Elsa told her to. If Linnae had indeed been captured somehow, her kidnappers had to have knocked her out somehow. And if that had happened, then Linnae physically could not wake up without Elsa's permission. With that thought, Elsa closed her eyes and concentrated hard. _Linnae. Wake up. Now,_ she ordered quietly but firmly.

Almost instantly a sleepy reply came back. _Hi, Elsa. Thanks for waking me up,_ Linnae 'said'. Then, in a frightened way, _Elsa, I am chained up somewhere! It is dim, and there are many sour-looking humans. I want out! I am sorry, Elsa! I should have listened to you! Where are you?_

Elsa squeezed Katie's hand. "You were right, Katie. She's in trouble," she said quickly, and then replied to Linnae carefully: _I am trusting you to tell me the truth. Can anyone around you communicate with you verbally like Rapunzel and I can? If so, I don't dare tell you where I am. Also, how were you knocked out?_

 _No, these humans do not have magic. They are scared because I woke up._ (Linnae sounded quite pleased at this.) _I ate some fish off a boat. It was so tasty that I ate so many I got sleepy. The bad humans had sleepy stuff they put in the fish. I really am sorry, Elsa. I did not know. Where are you?_ Linnae was so regretful her 'voice' made Elsa giggle, despite the situation.

"That crazy dragon ate fish with some sort of knock-out substance in it!" Elsa said, trying her best to stifle her laughter. She sent Linnae a quick reply. _That explains it. And, well…I'm in a U.S. hospital. I'm injured, but I'm okay, I promise. Are the people that captured you treating you all right, all things considered?_

 _They are treating me like a stupid animal, but they are not torturing me or anything, if that is what you mean. They mostly ignore me. Elsa, I do not believe that you are okay. I need to come rescue you and take you to Corona. Then your cousin can heal you._ Linnae paused before sending Elsa another message. _These humans are very bad, Elsa. They want you. I am just bait and a scientific specimen. They do not know I can understand them._

 _Linnae, if your captors aren't hurting you in any way-_ Elsa started.

 _They cannot hurt me, Elsa. I think they have already tried. I just heard one of them say they have shot me and the bullets merely bounced off. You made me with impenetrable scales of ice. I cannot be hurt. The worst they can do is put me to sleep again, but I know better now. I shall not eat anything they offer me,_ Linnae replied. _I like to eat, but I do not have to._

Elsa frowned at that, but she was glad Linnae was fine. If Linnae was made of her impenetrable ice, _nothing_ those people did would hurt Linnae. If anything, those people were in danger, not Linnae. And…wait a minute! Linnae would be the perfect spy, and besides, even if Linnae _could_ escape, she would lead her captors right to Elsa, which would just make everything worse. _If your captors aren't hurting you in any way, could you stay there and be a spy for me? They don't know you can understand them, so they'll say all kinds of secrets in front of you._

Linnae shot back a gleeful, _Am I allowed to freeze their butts if they annoy me? But yes, of course I can do that. I promise I will do as you say this time._

* * *

BACK IN ARENDELLE…

Late that night, Anna tossed and turned in her bed. Elsa had never shown up. Kai had never shown up. Linnae had never shown up. _Something's wrong,_ Anna thought for the zillionth time. "What if they're stuck there and can't get back?" Anna asked aloud to the empty room. She turned over and hid her face under her pillow. _I got to stop worrying. Maybe Elsa's just running late or Linnae's having trouble finding her way back._

After a few more minutes of tossing and turning, Anna finally just got up and padded down the hall. The castle seemed very empty with no Elsa in it. Even through all the crazy events that had happened through the previous months, Anna couldn't remember ever being at home in the castle with no Elsa there at all anywhere nearby. She found herself knocking on Elsa's door, as if Elsa might just be on the other side, but of course there was no answer. Anna leaned her head against the painted snowflake door and just closed her eyes. She jumped when she felt something opening the door and then tapping her leg; then relaxed when she saw it was just Olaf.

"Elsa told me to make you feel better if she wasn't back on time," Olaf said, hugging Anna with his little stick arms. "And she said that you were _not_ supposed to worry about her or miss her."

Anna scowled, but she slipped into her sister's cool, neat room and just curled up in the comfy chair in the corner. Even without Elsa in it, the room remained a slightly-too-cool-to-be-completely-comfortable-for-anyone-but-Elsa temperature. "Well, I miss Elsa already! She should be back by now. What if she's hurt? Or lost? Or somebody kidnapped her and Kai couldn't free her? Or…I don't know…" Anna's voice trailed off.

"Maybe Elsa's sightseeing," Olaf suggested hopefully.

"She better not be or I'll smack her!" Anna immediately felt a bit bad for saying that; then thought better of it. _Well, I wouldn't_ smack _Elsa, but I might yell at her for making us all worry about her._

Olaf looked horrified at that. "Don't smack Elsa. That's not nice," he scolded. Then, after a moment's more consideration, "We should attack Elsa with lots of warm hugs when she gets back!" he suggested excitedly. "I like warm hugs. You give the best ones. Don't tell Elsa I said that, even though she thinks that too."

Anna frowned. _'You give the best ones'? 'She thinks that too'? Does Elsa really think that? Wait…of course she does. Nobody ever gave her any for so long…_ She finally just buried her face in the chair cushions. "I wouldn't be so worried if I just knew Elsa was all right," Anna muttered.

Anna decided to spend the rest of the night right there in her sister's room, even though it was a bit chilly. At least the chilliness made it feel more like Elsa was there. Although Anna would never admit it to anyone, least of all Elsa or herself, sometimes she wished Elsa's magic would leave her be. Just for a few hours, so her sweet big sister wouldn't keep wishing she was 'normal'. Elsa would see that being 'normal' was not so great as she thought it was and she would shush up all her ridiculous stupidity picking on herself. Anna loved her sister very much, but sometimes Anna thought Elsa was awfully dumb. Why couldn't Elsa see that she was plenty 'good enough' just like she was? She scowled, remembering how Elsa had acted right before she'd left when she saw herself 'in disguise' for the first time. _Elsa seemed so surprised that her 'normal' reflection was actually her. Why?_

What Anna had not told Elsa was that seeing her 'in disguise' like that just reminded her of a younger Elsa she had never seen or even had a real conversation with. Elsa's innocent face with the pale skin and faint freckles, along with the clothes and loose hair with the ribbons made her able to pass as a girl quite a bit younger than herself, but the whole thing also made Anna very upset. Anna just saw a fourteen- or fifteen-year-old or so Elsa all alone in her room.

Well, present-day Elsa was probably taller than fourteen-year-old Elsa had been, but still.

Anna finally fell asleep curled up in the chair; Olaf stayed sitting in Elsa's window seat.

* * *

IN THE UNITED STATES…OHIO TO BE EXACT…

Elsa was finding it impossible to sleep, despite the fact that she was very, very tired. Knowing someone would come in and check on her periodically through the night even if she wasn't awake unnerved her. And Kai was not allowed to stay in the room with her and Katie after nine P.M. because 'visiting hours' were over. Kai had assured her he was staying in the waiting room downstairs, which was better than nothing, but still. It wasn't that she had nothing to do; she intended to start reading one of her books the second Katie fell asleep, but she was so, so tired. And her head hurt and she was tired of hearing the little irritating noises from her IV drip and the weird pulse measuring thing. The more she tried to ignore the sounds, the more her ears seemed to focus on them. Elsa finally just put her hands over her ears and scrunched her eyes shut. _Good grief, Elsa, you are being so immature. Katie is nine and she's hearing the same noises you are and they don't bother her._

"D'you want to listen to some music or watch a movie?" Katie suggested from her side of the room. She'd noticed what Elsa was doing and easily figured out what was bothering her. "You could use my iPod. My parents gave it to me for my birthday, so it's brand-new. Or we could watch a movie. They said there's a bunch in the movie room down the hall. Want to see _your_ movie? There won't be anyone in there now since it's late and all the kids are usually supposed to go to sleep early. Why'd they put you in the kid section anyway? Aren't you twenty-one?"

That made Elsa giggle. "Because 'Nicolette' is only almost fifteen. You're right, I _am_ twenty-one. I turn twenty-two in less than two months, actually," she said. She wasn't sure what an iPod was; the little electronic device Katie was holding looked a bit fragile and she didn't want to risk messing it up somehow, especially since Katie said it was her brand-new birthday present. But she did know what a movie was, and going to a movie room sounded interesting. _Am I supposed to get up? I don't even know…_ "I think I would like to see a movie, but I don't know if I'm allowed to get up." _And my legs ache…_

"You just have to push the call button and tell the nurse what you want. I'm ninety-nine point nine nine nine percent sure it'd be fine," Katie explained. "Elsa, I thought your birthday was in the winter. On the winter solstice."

Elsa frowned. " _Anna's_ birthday is in the winter, and it sometimes falls on the winter solstice, but mine is in the summer. July 2, to be exact. Who said my birthday was in the winter?" She paused before looking down at her hands and adding softly, "I don't want to bother anyone here and make them take me down the hall. I'm sure there's a lot of others here that need help more than I do. They didn't need to help me at all."

"But Elsa, that's what doctors and nurses are supposed to do. Help people. Besides, you haven't been being annoying calling for a nurse a zillion times every two seconds. You haven't called for anything at all," Katie pointed out. _What's wrong with Elsa? She seems…sad somehow. Just a little bit. I wanna make her happy. I shan't scare her and start fangirling all over her or something._ "Do you want to go watch a movie?" she asked. If Elsa wouldn't call for help herself, then Katie would do it for both of them. So there.

"Well…yes…"

"Then I am going to call somebody in here. There. I just did."

* * *

When the same nurse that had given the girls their dinner came in, she quickly obliged their request, although only on the contingency that Elsa didn't walk down the hall herself and that they promised to be very quiet. "I'm supposed to be off work in twenty minutes, but I'm staying until you're healed enough to leave," she told Elsa. "Which should be tomorrow morning. You already seem better than earlier."

Soon the girls were settled in the movie room. Katie had gotten rather upset when she found out about Elsa's weak leg, but she quickly got over that once Elsa had just said, "I'm still just…me. Is that okay?" in a slightly worried voice. Although Katie was only nine, she sensed that Elsa still wasn't very confident in herself, and _that_ made her upset. Elsa was supposed to be happy and self-confident by now. And she was _not_ supposed to have to wear a brace on her leg or get in a car accident. But Elsa was still very much like Katie had imagined her to be, even if some things about her were different. "See, your and Anna's movie is an animated cartoon. There's your CGI self, Elsa! Isn't that cool? Lots and lots of American kids think you're just really awesome movie characters," Katie explained. "But _I_ knew you were real. So did my two best friends. I wish you could meet them."

Elsa was intrigued at the whole idea of seeing an animated version of herself on the screen. She looked at the DVD case and frowned in confusion. "Why have we all got giant eyes and heads? And I am not that skinny," she informed Katie, pointing at the pictures on the case. "Neither is Anna. Maybe that's why people think I'm not human."

Katie tried very, very hard not to giggle, but she couldn't help it. "Elsa, most cartoons have characters with unrealistic bodies."

"Well, I know I have eyes too big for my face, but they're not _that_ big. And I would be really sick if I was that skinny," Elsa replied matter-of-factly. "Okay, I'm ready to see alien Anna and me on the TV thing," she added, handing the case back to Katie. "And, what does this CGI thing stand for?" she asked curiously. "Are all animated cartoon moving pictures CGI?" She paused for a second before adding, "How does the moving picture player work in the first place? Are the discs holding the moving pictures together?"

"I don't know. Computer generated imaging, maybe? And no, not all cartoons are CGI. Some are hand-drawn," Katie said, unsure of any other factual information she could tell the older girl. She didn't bother trying to say anything about Elsa's very matter-of-fact ideas on movie Elsa's looks, because real Elsa was right. _I like talking to Elsa. She's awfully nice and she talks so funny about any modern things she's never seen before._ Katie also liked Elsa's slight but still clearly obvious accent, but she didn't tell Elsa that because she thought that would probably be kind of rude. "I don't know how to _explain_ how it works…you'd have to get a book or something. And the discs-which are called DVDs-store the movies on them. I guess you could say they 'hold them together', though, if you wanted to."

Elsa flinched as she watched her CGI younger self playing in the ballroom with CGI five-year-old Anna. Somehow she knew this wasn't one of the many times they had played in there safely; it was the accident. _Elsa, calm down. It's not real. It's not real._

 _But it's like watching a flashback from an outside point of view! I hate this!_ Elsa bit back a pained scream when animated little Elsa hit the animated little Anna, and she found herself shaking and hiding her face in her hands before she could stop herself. "I-I…I'm sorry…I don't w-want t' see anymore," she whispered. "I'm s-sorry-I didn't mean to. I-" _Elsa, stop it! You're acting like an immature idiot. This is supposed to be a moving picture for children and you're terrified. What's wrong with you?_

Katie quickly clicked 'stop' on the remote and just blinked in surprise at the snowflakes floating around Elsa. Even though she'd genuinely believed that Elsa had ice powers, it was greatly bewildering to her to actually _see_ snowflakes floating around from…nothing. And the movie she liked so much had scared poor Elsa half to death. She wished she'd thought of the fact that Elsa wouldn't want to relive the incident that must have hurt her inside badly. Now the older girl sat next to her trembling, tears running down her cheeks. "No, Elsa, please don't cry," Katie begged desperately, tugging Elsa's cold hands away from her face. "We don't have to watch this if you don't want to. It's ok, I promise."

"I'm fine. Mostly. No, I _am_ okay. I'm being stupid," Elsa said, half to herself and half to Katie. She reached for the remote thing that controlled what the screen did and poked the 'play' button. Tears still streaked her cheeks, but she was determined not to break down like that again. She would _not_ freak out again. She would sit there and watch the moving picture thing like a normal person.

Katie held Elsa's hand tightly all through the rest of the movie. Elsa cried several more times (all through the 'Do You Want to Build a Snowman?' song, especially), but she didn't break down or freak out again. And she giggled at Anna's dialogue with Kristoff when they'd been riding in the sled looking for her and then gasped when the wolves chased them. She wondered whether Anna had really said those exact words or not. They certainly sounded believable, anyways. Watching herself build her ice palace was surreal. "That…that's my _ice palace_ ," she whispered in childlike wonder. And it was odd but very cool to hear her song sung in English rather than her native Norwegian…and she didn't think she sounded nearly as good when she sang herself.

"Elsa, I don't believe you," Katie proclaimed with great confidence when Elsa expressed that thought. She paused the movie again and grinned encouragingly at Elsa. "Would you sing a teeny bit for me? Pleeeaase?"

Elsa's cheeks turned pink, and she immediately shook her head, nervously fiddling with her hair. "I…I don't like singing in front of people," she admitted after a moment. "And you prob'ly wouldn't want to hear it in my language anyway. I don't know all of it in English. I'd have to translate it first and memorize it." _Elsa, you are being selfish. This little girl has been nothing but nice to you, and you can't sing a bit of your own song for her?_

Katie looked a bit disappointed, but she easily understood Elsa's reaction. Of course the older girl was nervous. Why wouldn't she be? "That's all right. But I'd actually _like_ to hear you sing it in your language. That'd be super awesome, really."

Elsa's impulsive reaction was to just sing a few lines from the song, making sure to stay quiet. If she sang the way she usually did at home, the whole hallway might hear her. While Elsa thought the little kids on the hall probably wouldn't mind, she couldn't risk people who didn't like her or know who she was hearing her.

"That was just…just _lovely_ , Elsa," Katie said happily, reaching to give Elsa a hug. "It was just _perfect_."

When the Weselton guards attacked her CGI self in the ice palace, she just felt sick and weirdly detached. Seeing the situation from the outside firmly reminded her that while she _had_ gone far too close to her own dark side, it wasn't unprovoked. Elsa squeezed Katie's hand and bit her lip again when her animated self woke up in the castle dungeon. She scowled at the screen when Hans betrayed her little sister, and she visibly flinched when Anna sacrificed herself to save Elsa's life. She would have to ask Anna if that whole freezing experience had pained her as badly as it looked like it did…

And at the end when animated Elsa went ice-skating in the courtyard, she cried again, although this time they were happy tears. The whole thing was far too close to reality for Elsa, although she was glad there didn't seem to be anything false portrayed in the movie. When Katie asked her what she thought, she said, "I hated it and loved it at the same time. But it was really, really good. I liked the ice palace sequence, though. And I was surprised it wasn't…boring, although I still don't quite understand why anyone would want to see a moving picture about my family and me."

Katie grinned, glad that Elsa had at least _sort of_ liked it. "Because you're a really relatable 'character', that's why. And there's a little short film about you helping Anna celebrate her birthday, too. D'you want to see it? You're a lot happier in it, I promise."

Elsa tilted her head to one side in confusion. "The moving picture people made something about _that_?! Why? I ended up with meningitis and there wasn't even a party…I kind of messed up Anna's birthday…" She didn't understand how that would make a good story.

"No, you just have a regular cold and you and Anna go around Arendelle following a red string in it. And you sneeze a bunch of really cute snowgies." _Elsa had meningitis? What else has happened to her or Arendelle that's not in the movie stuff?_ Katie wasn't exactly sure what meningitis was, but she knew people could die from it. She wondered what it had been like, really, for Elsa all those years the movie skipped over. "Elsa…was everything really like it is in the movie?" Katie asked curiously. "Did anything happen not like the movie?"

Elsa frowned, unsure how to answer that. "Well…the moving picture sort of makes you think our parents are dead, although to be fair it doesn't really say one way or the other. Anyways, they aren't. There isn't anything wrong in it, though. Just lots of details left out. Like I'm really, really happy the moving picture people didn't go on and on about all those years of isolation, but it felt odd seeing ten years go by in _one_ song and then skipping three more years after that." _And I'm sure this was omitted since it's meant to be entertainment for children, but that scene at the end of that song is…not complete. My suicide attempt isn't there, although I'm honestly very grateful that it's not included._ Elsa subconsciously held her left wrist close, suddenly very, very glad it was sprained and needed the funny velcro brace thing on it. She didn't want to see the faint pink scar there.

* * *

The nurse suddenly rushed into the room from where she'd been standing just outside the door and put her finger to her lips. "Be quiet, Katie, _Nicolette_ ," she whispered, quickly turning on a different movie. "Someone's coming."

Elsa immediately understood. The someone that was coming did not know she was Elsa, so she had to be Nicolette again, just an average teenage girl watching a movie with her hospital roommate. She tried her best to just focus on the new moving picture about fish called _Finding Nemo_ , but she sensed that something was very wrong. _Elsa, just stay calm and act innocent like you don't know anything._

"…supposed to be off work…what…staying for, Susan?" a slightly grating voice questioned.

"…just watching these kids…can't come…alone…" Elsa heard the nurse she now knew was Susan reply.

"…something wrong. …seen…news? What if…not hoax? They showed…images…dragons aren't supposed…real!" Then, "And you know something!" in a louder voice.

Katie and Elsa exchanged glances. Both of them knew what was wrong. _The news showed pictures of Linnae._

"Good grief, just come in here and see! There are just two young patients in here watching a movie!" Susan shouted, making sure that Elsa and Katie would hear her. _Elsa, cover your hair,_ she thought desperately. _Please…_

Katie was the one who spotted the huge container of dress-up stuff, and she quickly pulled the container close and flung a red hooded cape at Elsa and put a wolf mask on herself. "Your hair, Elsa!" she whispered. "Just play along! That other person out there isn't good!"

Elsa thought the plan was ridiculous-why on earth would she and Katie be playing Little Red Riding Hood while they were watching a moving picture thing?!-but she knew Katie was right. If the other person was already suspicious, her unique hair would be enough to give her away whether she was playing Nicolette or not. So she quickly put the cape on, making sure her hair was hidden under the hood. _Wait…my stupid leg. If that person sees it and immediately passes me over because Elsa 'isn't supposed' to be hurt, that'll help. But if they figure out who I am, I'll_ never _be able to hide or blend in here because of it…_

Before Elsa could do anything to hide her leg, the suspicious person marched in. Elsa kept her eyes glued to the screen, but she quickly took a mental image of the man so she could remember him. _Okay. Short-about my height. Slightly pudgy, partly bald. Light skin._

The man's eyes skimmed right over Elsa and Katie. He was looking for a girl with platinum hair in a braid wearing a blue dress, not two kids playing dress-up watching cartoons. And yet…his gaze drifted back to Elsa. This girl looked too young to be Elsa's age, but she seemed a little old for playing dress-up all the same. "Aren't you a bit old to be playing dress-up?" he asked suspiciously.

Elsa didn't dare answer, but she hesitantly met his accusing gaze, her blue eyes frightened. _Please go away. Please. Elsa, you_ have _to stay calm. One tiny mistake, and you're done for. And you can't talk. If he gets the slightest inkling of where your accent is from…_

"I made Nicolette play with me," Katie chirped innocently. "She makes a great Little Red Riding Hood, don't you think? I'm the big bad wolf. Want to be one of the three little pigs? I think you'd make a really, really awesome pig," she went on. "And we're watching a movie and you're in front of the screen, mister! We can't see!" Katie complained. "Marlin's gonna meet Dory soon, and-"

"No, I do _not_ wish to be one of the three little pigs," the man told her. He narrowed his eyes, spotting a glimpse of platinum hair under Elsa's hood.

Elsa thought if she hadn't been scared, Katie's subtly insulting comment would have made her laugh and laugh. As it was, she found herself biting the inside of her lip and just holding her hands close against her chest. She flinched when the man flipped her hood off, and she just looked down at her hands, willing herself not to make everything worse. If absolute worse came to worst, she would surprise everyone and seal herself and little Katie inside an impenetrable ice bubble. _Elsa, calm down. This would be a good time to conceal, don't feel for once. You cannot reveal your magic unless absolutely, positively necessary._

Susan marched over to the girls and just stood in front of them protectively. "You are scaring my patients! What do you think you're doing?! Leave those girls alone, for goodness sakes," she ordered.

Katie jumped in, " _I'm_ not scared! But you're invading our space!"

"I think," the man said, pointing at Elsa, "that _this_ one is scared because she knows everyone is going to find out about her. You're that ice queen, aren't you?" he spat.

"Nicolette is scared because she suffers from anxiety, and you are making it worse," Susan made up, not knowing it was actually mostly true. "Leave her and Katie alone."

Elsa had been horrified that Susan would have said such a thing-it was way, way, way too close to the truth for her-but she felt Katie giving her hand a reassuring squeeze and immediately felt better. _Katie knows that's not a lie, and she doesn't mind._

"Yeah, she told me that earlier, that it was a secret. And she said she's gotten mistaken for her movie lookalike a bunch of times at school and people tease her about it," Katie said, making things up as she went along. "Gosh, you must be awfully stupid for a grown-up. Why would you think the Snow Queen would be here anyway? She'd be wearing her pretty ice-dress and getting her pet dragon back! I saw it on the news channel."

The man finally backed up and began to leave the room. "All right, sorry for intruding on you kids. But if I find anything suspicious…"

Elsa was finally able to relax once the man was gone; she let out a breath she didn't know she had been holding. _Katie's the one that fixed everything…although I bet that man will be back. Kai and I need to get out of here soon._ She closed her eyes and just whispered a thank-you. _I just want to go to sleep. I'm so, so tired…_ "Ow!" Elsa let out a yelp and hid her arm when something, she wasn't sure what, made it sting.

"You can't have solid ice going into your IV; you need a new one. You have normal human bloodflow just like anyone else," Susan said quietly. "We're all lucky he didn't notice."

 _She called me normal like it wasn't any big deal…_ Elsa held out her arm and just watched curiously while the new one was put in, which Katie thought was weird and told Elsa so. "It's not like not looking at it would help. And I don't like not knowing when something's going to poke me," Elsa told the little girl. Another thought popped into her head- _those books are still in my room! in a sealed bag, but still!-_ and she looked worriedly up at Susan. "What if that man finds my books?"

"He won't; he has no idea which room you and Katie are in," Susan assured her, but she quickly began helping the girls back to their room. "It's pretty late, and you both need to rest, especially you, El-Queen Elsa."

Elsa smiled a bit at the fumbled title. "Just call me by my given name. I don't mind. You're helping take care of me, after all," she said quietly.

* * *

Soon the girls were safely settled back in their room, and they checked the news one last time before trying to go to sleep. Sure enough, there was a live video of Linnae, and it made Elsa upset, even though she knew the dragon was fine. Linnae just lay curled up in a cage far too small for a creature her size, her icy eyes blazing in irritation; and there was a chain around her neck bolting her to the floor. _Linnae, are you_ sure _you're okay? I just saw you on the news thing,_ Elsa 'told' her dragon worriedly.

 _Of course I am fine,_ Linnae replied impatiently. _Why are you worried? I am a guardian life construct, and you said I am helping by spying on the bad humans for you. Therefore I am fine, albeit very annoyed. I told you these humans cannot hurt me._ There was a pause before the rest of Linnae's message. _Elsa, I think I may be trapped here whether you want me to stay and spy or not. I am not strong enough to break the chains. I thought I could get it off and just stay voluntarily like you said to because it is a bit uncomfortable, but I cannot break it. I am sorry._ Linnae paused again before continuing, _I miss you, Elsa. I am supposed to be protecting you and I have failed because I ate the stupid sleepy fish._

Elsa felt a single tear trickle down her cheek as she watched Linnae on the live video cam. The dragon had put her front paws over her face, and she looked like she was trying to expand the frills on her neck but couldn't. _Linnae, it's going to be okay. We'll just have to be creative. They don't know you can understand them or that you can talk to me. No, you shouldn't have eaten the fish, but it's done now. Now your job is to be a spy, not protect me. I'll be fine._

Linnae lifted her head and flicked her tail, exposing the retractable stinger on the end. _I shall do that, Elsa. Thank you._

Elsa 'told' her dragon good night, and then she gingerly scooted farther under the covers and tried to go to sleep.

 **A/N: Elsa's now figured out what happened to Linnae, and she also has a secret spy, too.:) And she's raised a...not good person't suspicions, but she and Katie managed to throw him off the scent, at least temporarily.:)**

 **Next chapter coming soon!:) (In which Anna discovers a secret over a century old and receives a puzzling message from Elsa. :) )**


	24. Chapter 24

**A/N: Thanks to everyone who's followed/favorited and/or is reading but not reviewing:)**

 **readeronly76-Thank you:)**

 **Elsa Tomago-Elsa watching her own movie seemed like a logical thing that would happen, but I figured there was no way it wouldn't make her cry or something. :/ Wait and see:)**

 **FluffyKitten-It doesn't help that Elsa's used to Gerda's yummy cooking at home.:) Of course she will get hugs when she gets home. I think she needs them, too.:) I say Elsa saw whichever DVD cover you want her to see, although in my mind, she saw the one I have-the blu-ray one with Elsa in the top right corner and Kristoff and Anna in the middle with Sven between them and Olaf is on Sven's head.:P I figured if it made lots of us cry, it'd have to be really awful for Elsa to see at first...I mean, she literally watched herself relive everything, but she did see herself get a happy ending, too.:) Linnae will be fine.:) Oh, I'd say she's about Toothless size, more or less. Big but not so ginormous she's like a monster size dinosaur. :P**

 **DodgersGirl-Well, that would be because Linnae IS sort of like Toothless, lol.:) I'm glad you liked it.:) I wouldn't SWEAR that it makes a noise, but I'm pretty sure it does? Anyways, Elsa was in that sort of mood where every single little sound was bugging her, so even if it was pretty quiet, it still bothered her. (You know how you can ignore an annoying quiet sound for awhile, but then the second you notice it again, it's like it's SCREAMING to be heard? That.:P ) I PMed you:)**

 **orang biasa-Okay...more on the 'why do grown-ups actually believe there is such a thing as cryokinesis' somewhat soon. Just remember we don't know just HOW MUCH Elsa froze in the movie and the extent of it...:P You're right-if someone tried to tell me Elsa was real, I'd think they'd seen someone that just looked a lot like her. Linnae went and voluntarily ate fish off a boat that knocked her out. That's what let her be captured. (I don't think anyone would be able to capture her otherwise because she would know to fight back.) And nope, you didn't make me uncomfortable at all:)**

 **moohamquest-Of course Elsa can help Linnae! I wouldn't leave Linnae stauck like that forever. It's just that right now she's being a spy for Elsa since nobody knows Elsa can communicate with her directly and that Linnae understands human speech.:) Thank you:) I just thought Elsa ought to have another little friend.:)**

 **Olivia O'Neil-Thank you:) Well, it WAS risky, but that wasn't even what made the man suspicious.:P Of course Linnae will be okay:)**

 **On to the story:)**

Elsa awoke early the next morning, after sleeping restlessly all night. She glanced over at Katie, but the little girl was fast asleep. Elsa's head felt much better, although the nasty cut on her temple still hurt. The headache was mostly gone otherwise, though. _I'll just read for awhile. I hope Kai comes back up here soon; I want to make sure he's okay._ She pulled a book out of her bag and began reading, figuring she would just hide it among the pillows if someone came in to check on her or Katie. Before starting to read, she flicked on the news like she had seen Katie do the evening before.

A few minutes later, Elsa nearly panicked when she read something that made her realize something was probably very, very wrong back in her country. There were weird tracking device things that could be used to track any random items. She remembered Ms. Diane saying that it was possible that her laptop's history might be hacked eventually. Since the lady had originally been working for a place with probably easy access to this sort of technology, Elsa was more than a little suspicious that Ms. Diane probably _was_ genuinely nice, but that at least one of her possessions was bugged. Looking up at the television, she gasped.

"It has come to our knowledge that there is a strong possibility that the legendary Snow Queen of Arendelle can create life forms, like the captured dragon. We will be visiting her land shortly to begin potential negotiations," the president said. "No one need be worried; it's a small country that needn't be feared."

Elsa's mind raced. If the U.S. president visited Arendelle and she wasn't there, that would be bad. Very bad. Even worse, she had a sickening feeling that this wasn't just a meeting. There would be fighting; she just knew it. And Arendelle had no chance without her powers there to help protect it. She had to get back. She had to. _Wait…that news thing doesn't mean their president hates me. He_ has _to say something like that to prevent mass hysteria or something. Maybe he really does just want to talk, and he's taking precautions since a human with weird superpowers IS more than a little ridiculous, especially here. I'm 'strange' enough in my country; this modern world just makes that worse. That would make sense. And I have to get word to Anna somehow. I can't fly back on my own, especially with an injured wrist. I won't be able to get on a flying machine because they don't go to Arendelle. And it'll take way too long to get there if I can get a boat or a ship somehow…_ "And Linnae is captured," Elsa said to herself.

She was stuck.

Elsa pressed the call button and asked if her 'father' could be sent upstairs to visit her.

* * *

A couple hours later, Dr. Cook checked Elsa over and pronounced her well enough to leave. "You'll most likely be sore for a week or two, though, so take it easy," she admonished. She hesitated before adding, "I don't think you're going to be able to get out of the country safely. There are a lot of people after you, and not all of them wish you well. I was prepared for that, though…I can make it so your paperwork appears to say that your weak leg was caused by the car accident. So you could stay in the rehabilitation ward until you have a better plan or everything simmers down," she offered.

Elsa looked at Kai, wondering what he would think. That sounded awfully risky; she probably shouldn't be able to walk already if she had just hurt her leg the day before, and she didn't want to risk getting the friendly doctor in trouble either. Kai subtly shook his head, and Elsa quickly said, "Thank you very much, but I don't wish to cause any more trouble. We'll be fine." She smiled and struggled to her feet, all traces of nervous Nicolette gone. "I have an idea. A slightly risky, very good idea. May I please use this room for another hour or so?"

* * *

BACK IN ARENDELLE…

After lunch, Anna went outside into the castle courtyard and just sat on the edge of one of the fountains staring up at the sky. Elsa still wasn't back yet, and the longer she was gone, the more Anna worried that something awful had happened. Elsa had planned everything so carefully that Anna was deathly afraid that Elsa was in a lot of trouble _and_ Linnae was hurt or dead or something. _If Elsa was caught somewhere, she would have sent Linnae here without her. I know she would have. We should've received word from her by now._

Just then, a little pigeon landed right on her shoulder. This was strange enough in of itself, but this pigeon was nearly transparent, made of crystal clear ice. The ice bird chirped and jumped to Anna's hand. "Elsa," Anna whispered, sensing that something was indeed wrong, but glad that Elsa had at least been able to do this. She carefully removed the little tube from the ice bird's delicate leg and unrolled the message inside, but it was blank. Anna frowned in confusion. _Is it invisible ink? Wait…_ The ice bird pecked Anna's hand sharply and cooed in distress and shook its head. "I don't understand you!" Anna snapped. "Why would Elsa send something that can't talk?! I'm scared and…and…wait a second…" Anna's eyes widened in understanding. The bird was filled with water- _Elsa's_ water! That was why it wasn't quite transparent. "How am I supposed to get the water out?" she asked herself, carefully picking up the bird and looking at it closely. There was a tiny cap on an opening on the bird's back.

Kristoff came running from the stables with another identical ice bird in his hands. "Anna! Anna, what's going on?! Are these secret messages or something? I know they're from Elsa, but…why would she send _pigeons_ , of all things?! I've already snapped the poor thing's leg off by accident, although it seemed somewhat scared, not in pain. Why would she send something so fragile? And also…no offense to these cute little creatures, but these are _not_ like the other live things Elsa's made. They're less…I don't know. Less alive, I guess. These are more like message couriers and that's it than actual animals."

"They're unmelting but breakable ice," Anna mused, half to herself and half to Kristoff.

Both Anna and Kristoff looked at each other at the same time. "She was worried they'd be intercepted."

* * *

After taking the birds inside and up to the library, Anna and Kristoff discovered more. If Anna touched Kristoff's bird or vice versa, the little creatures began melting; the second they stopped, the ice birds went back to normal. And the blank paper? "Lemon juice," Kristoff suggested.

Sure enough, Kristoff was right. Kristoff's bird hadn't had a message, but it was filled with water just like Anna's. Once they had gotten the ink to show up, Anna held the message so both she and Kristoff could read it. Anna nearly screamed in frustration. "This thing isn't even readable! It's in some weird code!" she exclaimed. "How's Elsa expecting that I'm supposed to decode this thing?! She didn't send any decoder!"

Kristoff frowned. Anna was right; the message made no sense at all. It looked like gibberish. "Well, Elsa must have trusted that you could figure it out or she wouldn't have sent it," he said reasonably.

Gerda rushed in before Anna could reply. "Miss Anna, I think something is wrong. There are four…" she saw the two ice birds near Anna and Kristoff. "Four of those little birds in the attic. They tried to follow me here, but I shut them in because I thought you should handle it since you're in charge while your sister is gone. I'm not sure how they got in, although there was a small hole in the roof they could have possibly fit through…"

"Four?" Anna asked. "Why four…?" _Wait a second._ "Gerda, please get Nikoleta, Eliot, and Anikka; and then follow us all up to that icky ol' attic. I'm not completely sure, but I think Elsa's trusting the six of us with whatever's going on."

Anna's suspicion was right. The second all six of them were up in the dark, musty attic, the four other ice birds flew to their respective humans. Anikka touched hers gently, intrigued with why her adoptive mommy would have sent her such a thing. "I got a message!" she announced proudly, waving it in the air. (Anikka's bird flew a safe distance away from her.) "Wait…it's blank!"

"No, it's not." Anna immediately knelt on the floor next to the little girl and looked at the paper. _Two separate messages so if one was intercepted, the message would be useless without the other,_ Anna thought. "We gotta activate the invisible ink like we did to the other one," she said, holding it up to Gerda's candle as she did so. Soon the message was readable. Sure enough, this one was the decryption explanation. She scowled once she realized just how long it was going to take to decode Elsa's message. "This is the _decoding_ message, and she wrote it in Norwegian with every word spelled backwards," she muttered. For Anna, that deduction was easy-Norwegian was her native tongue, for goodness sakes!-but she knew if someone in the United States had found it and managed to get this far, that person probably wouldn't have realized that any too easily.

Every letter was represented by two ahead of it: A was C, B was D, C was E, and so on. Two words were spelled backwards followed by one spelled correctly. The sentences alternated between Norwegian and Spanish. It made Anna want to scream. She had learned about encoding messages herself and had been temporarily fascinated with it when she was younger, but she _hated_ decoding things with a passion. It was tedious and took so, so long. And crazy Elsa had made up an annoyingly complex code with multiple layers to it. Of course, Anna knew that was kind of the whole point, but still. "Well, it's kind of complicated and it's gonna take me awhile, but I can decode Elsa's gibberish message," Anna said finally. "I guess I better go work on that." She jumped when something crashed to the floor loudly.

"Sorry…I…not 'ean to," Eliot apologized. He had accidentally knocked what he thought was a bunch of old window panes off a shelf in a dark corner of the attic. "Um…th-those are…not n-normal…glass," he said, pointing at them. None of the glass-looking things had broken or even chipped.

Anna narrowed her eyes as she bent to pick up one of the old window panes. Instantly she sensed that it wasn't glass at all. There was a barely detectable coolness on the 'glass' beneath the decades of dust. She carefully brushed off the layers of dust, making herself sneeze. Another piece of 'glass' was much the same. In fact, a quick look revealed they were all like that. Dozens of them. Anna turned to face the others, hugging the first pane of 'glass' she had picked up close, her blue-green eyes wide. "These are magic," she said quietly. "But not Elsa's, that's obvious."

Nikoleta just stared at the 'window panes' on the floor and the rest on the shelf and then back at Anna. "But what are they?" she asked curiously. "And who else has-or rather _had_ -magic like Elsa's? Are you sure?"

 _Ingrid,_ Anna thought, but she just nodded. "I can feel it. They're the type of unmelting, unbreakable ice that just feels cool to the touch, like my snowflake pendant Elsa made for me. See, you can touch it for yourself," she offered. What Anna didn't say was that she had actually been able to _sense_ the magic within the old 'glass' before she had touched it. Anna had never noticed such a thing about herself before since the only magic she had ever been around often was Elsa's, but now she knew she had a tiny, tiny trace of magic of her own. She could sense the presence of it. Maybe it was just for the ice magic that ran in her family, she didn't know, but it still made her happy. That meant she was a tiny bit like Elsa.

"Just feels like glass to me," Nikoleta said, shrugging. "It's awfully weird it didn't break, though." Once everyone else had touched the glass, they said the same thing.

Anna huffed in frustration. "Don't you guys believe me?! I _know_ they're magic; I know they are! How else do you explain that they don't break when they're dropped?!"

"Anna, they are blank. Why would-assuming you're right-another ice mage make a bunch of blank sheets of ice and have them left up here?" Kristoff asked logically.

"You're the one that lived with the trolls! I thought you of all people would understand!" Anna scowled and flung the old magic ice to the floor. "I don't know why these things are up here, but they _are_ magic! I know they are! I am not imagining things! And all of you had better keep this discovery to yourselves 'til Elsa can see this and figure it out," she ordered in her best authoritative voice.

Anna plopped down on the floor and sent everyone out of the attic so she could work on decoding Elsa's message in peace. Somehow the creepiness of the attic had disappeared and Anna wasn't scared at all.

* * *

Elsa had waited until after Katie's parents had taken Katie home from the hospital before enacting her plan. After the birds had been released out the window, she turned back to Kai, a determined expression on her face. "Okay, that's taken care of. Tiny birds are not going to be caught, and if they are, they will disintegrate when touched. They weren't really…alive like Olaf or Linnae." _Or Rania or Marshmallow,_ she couldn't help thinking. Although Elsa knew that her other two live snow creations had sacrificed themselves to save her life back at Christmas, she still wished there was some way to bring them back all the same. "Kai, now I need to know something. Are you okay? Please tell me the truth."

Kai frowned at her. "I could ask the same of you, Miss Elsa, but I am fine. Sore knee, but it's fine. We need to get home, and it's my job to protect you, which I've already failed to do. So I'm fine." He paused before changing the subject. "I went and bought us clean clothes and some food that won't go bad."

Elsa limped over to Kai and made some ice to put on his knee. "Ice should make it feel better," she said firmly. Before either she or Kai could say or do anything else, the door flew open and the man that had seen her and Katie in the movie room the night before marched in. _Oh no._ She was caught red-handed with ice in her bare hand. Why, oh why hadn't she locked the door?! Hoping she'd be quick enough that the man wouldn't notice, she instantly dispelled the ice, but she was too late.

"I _knew_ it! I just knew it!" the man hissed. "Wait a second, where did the evidence go?!" he demanded, bewildered as to where the ice could have gone that quickly.

Elsa decided to play along. Maybe the man would decide he had just been seeing things and leave her and Kai alone. "What evidence?" she asked innocently. She yelped when the man abruptly shoved her to the floor and grabbed her hair. _Elsa, calm down! You're making ice under you! Stop it!_

Kai narrowed his eyes and stood up. "Sir, leave my daughter alone! I could have you arrested for assaulting someone, a young girl to boot! Leave her alone!" _Elsa, you better come up with a plan, and quickly, because I sure don't have one…_

When Elsa realized the man had clearly seen her 'frightened ice', she knew her Nicolette ruse was busted. She would have to admit to being herself, but that also meant she didn't have to 'act' nervous or scared anymore. She could fight back on her own terms. 'Elsa' was more confident than 'Nicolette'. Not a lot, but enough. "Let go of me. Now," Elsa ordered, staring the man right in the eyes.

The man twisted his hand in her hair, but Elsa didn't back down this time. She reached up with her good hand and grabbed the man's arm, willing her body to grow cold all over. "I said, let go of me. Now," she repeated.

The man didn't release her, and she dropped her skin's surface temperature further. "I said. Let. Go. Now!" Elsa's blue eyes flashed, and she quickly put herself back on her feet using her air currents the second the man released her. _Stay calm, Elsa. Stay calm._

"What did you just do?!" Now the man looked slightly frightened, but mostly angry. He rubbed his arm where Elsa's freezing hand had grabbed it. "You probably gave me frostbite," he hissed.

"You are lucky that's all I gave you," Elsa shot back. "I have not done anything to hurt you or anyone else here." She quickly froze the man's feet in place to prevent him from coming after her again.

"I see that you're different from the girl I saw last night. I wonder how much of what that child and nurse said about you last night was true. _Do_ you have anxiety problems?" the man asked. When Elsa took a step backwards, he smirked, knowing he must have hit a nerve. "You know, _Elsa,_ that creature you made has been captured. It could probably be released in exchange for-"

Elsa lifted her head and stood tall. She would _not_ let this person frighten or upset her like that. "You know, _sir,_ I do have what you call anxiety problems. And you know what else? I believe _you_ are scared of _me_ and do not wish to admit it. Yet you have the ridiculous presumption to make it sound like you are doing me a tremendous favor to hand myself in in exchange for my dragon. I find it completely laughable that you-someone who believed I was indeed the 'legendary Snow Queen'-dared to grab said person by the hair like that." Elsa held out her signature snowflake floating in her hand and walked right up to the man. "What would _you_ have done if you had been in my place?" she asked, knowing the man would come up with all kinds of horrible outcomes without her threatening a single thing.

Sure enough, the man paled. Then he smirked a second later. "That kid Katie you made friends with yesterday? I'm sure she could be…targeted if you don't cooperate, if you get my meaning. Same with every person you've encountered here that knows who you are. Susan, Dr. Cook, Timothy…" He let his voice trail off. "Diane," he added pointedly.

"I could get you in a lot of trouble for that. I could kill you right this second if I wanted to," Elsa said weakly, all bravado gone. _What am I supposed to do?!_

"You could, but you would only get yourself in trouble, Queen Elsa of Arendelle. You have no authority here. No jurisdiction. You attack me and that's an act of aggression. Would your tiny country like to fight back against a world power like the States?"

Another thought suddenly popped into Elsa's head, but she didn't voice it. _This man is Diane's boss. How else would he even know I know her?_ Elsa held the man's triumphant gaze, but she said nothing.

"See, I can't target, say, your family because that would be an act of aggression towards your country. But American citizens? You can't do anything about that."

"You would target your own native citizens just to get to me?!" Elsa demanded incredulously. "Why would you even do that?!" She just didn't understand how a part of a country's government could target its own citizens. Elsa couldn't imagine ever doing such a thing, and she couldn't imagine her parents or Rapunzel's parents doing that, either. _If he's not really for the United States government, even though he has those official-looking IDs?_ a sudden thought questioned. _No...that can't be right. I'm just being paranoid._

"Every mission has its losses or casualties."

"Not civilians, you horrible savage!" Elsa exploded. "It isn't right to sacrifice people when it's not even needed! It's _wrong_! You want to stop terrorism and you're inflicting a smaller version of it on your own people! That's terrible!" She stared the man right in the eyes as she added, "I will not be a player in your game. I am not a pawn, and if you cause trouble for me or _anyone else_ to try to get to me, I promise you I will fight back. I don't care what modern technology things your country has; I _will_ fight back." _And I will win, because I have help. Loyal help._

The man waited until Elsa had walked to the doorway with Kai right behind her and then held up his cell phone. "The Katie girl and her parents have already been, shall we say… _moved_. I have proof right here. If you don't come with me, they can just be ended if you would like that instead."

Kai gave Elsa's shoulder a reassuring squeeze as they looked at the picture. Elsa lifted her chin and kept her expression neutral as she said, "Very well. I will come with you, but you must release Katie and her parents; you must promise not to hurt anyone else; and you must take Kai home and prove to me that you have done so." To prove she was telling the truth, she unfroze the man's feet. _Wait a second…_ "You'll have to excuse me for a moment; I have to…go," she added, and headed into the bathroom. Quick as a wink, she put a thin layer of impenetrable ice around her torso, figuring that should help protect her bruised ribs and keep anyone from killing her by shooting her or something; then carefully put a bit of the same impenetrable ice over each of the fastenings on her leg brace. _I can't risk someone taking it away from me again. I'd get scared and I'd probably be trapped…_ Then she made a face at her reflection in the mirror and tried not to laugh. That mean man was scared of her, and she still had that bandage on her temple and there was a cut on her lip and the right side of her was all bruised and scraped up still. _Maybe I look a bit…what is that phrase I don't like Anna saying…bad-ass. That's it. And…and I'm nervous, yes, but I'm not scared right now. I'm really not._ She quickly put her hair back in her usual single braid and left the bathroom. _I promised to_ come with _that man, not_ cooperate _with him._

She would make sure Katie and her parents were safe, and then she would go home and be prepared for whatever happened next.

* * *

"Kai, don't worry. I'll be fine," Elsa whispered outside in a dirty alley behind the hospital a few minutes later. She kept her blue eyes trained on that man as he climbed into a car with tinted windows. "And make Anna read those books."

Kai nodded. Surprisingly the man hadn't bothered to look in the bag or Elsa's purse; Elsa left both with Kai, trusting he would get the things home. "I will, Miss Elsa. Promise me you'll defend yourself if need be." He understood what Elsa was doing; she'd made plans should she be identified and explained them to him, but he was still worried. Elsa couldn't be trusted to defend herself if she was the only one in danger, and he was concerned that she might get in over her head if there was some sort of modern weapon or prison she couldn't handle by herself.

But Elsa immediately nodded. "Ice bubble," she muttered cryptically, and she gave Kai a hug, subtly slipping a small ice bottle filled with water in his pocket, before going over to the car with the tinted windows. Inside she was trembling, but on the outside she radiated confidence. Maybe she could psych out that mean man without doing a thing…

"Your guardian will be picked up here via helicopter and taken back to your country," the man told her. "Get in the back."

"I will sit up front," Elsa replied, and did so, ignoring the angry look the man was giving her. Elsa's senses were all on high alert; she was determined to learn every bit of information about what exactly was going on, and she was _not_ going to be caught by a surprise attack like when Jade had captured her not all that long ago. So when she saw in her peripheral vision that the man was about to punch her, she immediately countered that before he could do a thing, her own much weaker fist reinforced with rough ice. "I will not put up with that," she spat angrily. _Anna told me it was okay to defend myself. She told me it was okay to defend myself,_ she reminded herself over and over.

"What did you just do?! No girl can punch like that!" The man massaged his cheek where Elsa had hit him.

"Ice knuckles instead of brass ones," Elsa retorted matter-of-factly. She kept her expression neutral as the man suddenly accelerated out of the alley and then turned into another a few blocks away. _What is he doing? I'll not give him the satisfaction of asking that. I can't… And where is he taking me anyway? I've seen his stupid badge; I know he's Diane's old boss, but…where? And why? Diane said the trouble was that there were bad people in important positions, not that the whole agency was bad. What if this man is a crazy terrorist person that's just infiltrating a government agency for his own reasons? No, that can't be right. I'm just being paranoid…_ She involuntarily flinched when the man abruptly shoved something on her hand and then reached for her other one. _Not again. Not again, not again, not again._ "You don't have t-to put that nasty metal thing on my other hand. My wrist is s-sprained," she said quietly.

"I don't care. I don't trust you."

Elsa dearly wanted to just get out of that car and run away, far, far away. _That's stupid, Elsa. You can't run anyway._ Before she could stop herself, she crossed her arms on the dashboard of the car and put her head down as frightened tears began trickling down her cheeks. She just wanted to go _home._ She missed Anna, and she wanted to make sure Katie and her parents were safe. On impulse, she sent a message to Linnae. That was one friend that no one could take away from her. _Linnae, I'm scared. I wanna go home! I don't want to be strong anymore,_ she cried out mentally.

 _Elsa, I do not know exactly what is happening to you, but I am sure you can fix whatever it is. Perhaps think creatively? I am fine. A girl named Katie and her parents are here with me. From what I have heard, I think the bad humans are intending to bring you here as well. Elsa, you will be fine. Come here and rescue your friend and then go home and help protect Arendelle. Wait…I know what is going on. One of the bad humans has threatened you into cooperating. Just cooperate until he or she gets you here. Then unleash your magic. You can do it! You are powerful and plenty strong enough._ Linnae's 'voice' sounded completely confident in Elsa and her abilities.

 _Thank you, Linnae. I'll try…_ Elsa felt a sharp prick in her arm, and she quickly lost consciousness.

* * *

When Elsa came to, she found herself still riding in the tinted window car, but she was lying across the back seat, her hands restrained. _Great. What else is wrong?_ Keeping her eyes closed just in case the man was watching her as he drove, she slowly iced over the inside of her shackles, trying to check if it was that weird metal that contracted when it got cold. It was. _All right, Elsa. You had an idea for this in case it ever happened again. Time to find out if it works._

In an instant, Elsa had iced over the inside of the metal and began willing her unbreakable ice to expand against the pressure of the contracting metal. Her left hand quickly gave out because of her injured wrist, but after several seconds, the other one shattered. _It works!_ Elsa realized the man was playing loud music up front and hadn't even heard the metal shatter! She grinned as she slipped one finger of her good hand between her injured wrist and the metal still restraining her other hand and quickly repeated the experiment. It took a bit longer that time, but it was still successful.

Thinking quickly, she sat up and held a razor sharp icicle to the man's neck, ignoring the scared and accusatory thoughts that told her to stop. She understood what had happened-the man had knocked her out somehow-but she was no longer frightened. She was angry. "Tell your coworkers to release Katie and her parents and take them home or I will slit your throat," she threatened, although she had no intentions of doing any such thing. _You can't say that, Elsa! That's just…evil._

 _I'm not really going to do it; I just want the man to let me go and I want to make sure Katie's safe!_

 _Well, that's dumb._

The car abruptly slammed to a stop on the shoulder of a highway Elsa didn't recognize. The man was scared now; Elsa should have woken up about now, but she shouldn't have been able to free her hands or even move that much…right? "You cooperate or I'll have your friends ended," he shot back, pulling out his phone and dialing a number.

Elsa scrunched her eyes shut and poked the man's neck slightly harder with her icicle, drawing a bead of blood. _I can't do it. I can't. I'm not worth it. I'm just not,_ she thought, tears filling her blue eyes. _The threat has to be enough. It just has to! Please?_ "Y-you just go right on and do that," she said, trying to appear impassive. _Elsa, you don't have to fatally injure this man to threaten him._ Anna's voice seemed to say. _You_ are _'worth it', Elsa. If you don't care about yourself, fine. Get yourself home for my sake and your citizens'. You can do it. We love you._ Elsa knew it was just her own thoughts, but that _was_ what Anna would say, and that knowledge strengthened her. "Call them on your communication device and do as I say," she ordered.

As it turned out, Elsa didn't have to do anything else at all; the man released the steering wheel and put his hands up. Maybe that disloyal woman Diane had been right. The only way they would ever really get help from Elsa was in a friendly manner, if at all. Or if she was unconscious. She was too strong for threats to work. The girl had been injured and knocked out and here she was threatening him. "I give up, Snow Queen, you win," he blubbered. "What would you have me do?"

Elsa withdrew her icicle, but then realized a moment too late that the man was toying with her. A bullet's impact slammed her back against the back seat, and she blinked several times before realizing she was merely shaken. The ice "armor" beneath her t-shirt had done its job! Elsa was so relieved she inexplicably began giggling as she disabled the man's weapon and hauled herself back into the front seat. But right now, she didn't care. She held out the bullet in her palm and continued giggling. "Oh, I bet you weren't expecting that! My bulletproof ice _worked_!" she crowed. "It worked!" She dropped the used bullet in the man's lap and grabbed his phone. "Call wherever you are keeping Katie and her parents and get them back home. Immediately," she ordered, her blue eyes twinkling.

While the man shakily dialed, muttering about how humans, especially skinny young girls, were not supposed to be bulletproof, Elsa found all of the man's IDs and badge in his wallet and then mischievously destroyed them.

"Your friends are on the way home," the man spat. "Wait…Elsa! Queen Elsa, why did you do that?! I did what you asked!" he exclaimed. "You destroyed _everything_! How am I going to replace those things?!"

Elsa shrugged. "Take me to the Lake Erie shoreline where the large amusement park called Cedar Point is, _Oscar,_ " she ordered, not addressing the man's questions. She didn't know why she had destroyed all those identification materials. It was probably immature, but oh well.

The man, whose name was indeed Oscar, just stared at her. "You want to go to an amusement park?! What, did you want to ride that crazy 420 foot roller coaster too?"

"I have ridden it before. I have made my own ice copy of it, too," Elsa replied with a bit of a smirk. "I said, take me to the Lake Erie shoreline where that park is," she repeated. _Because I know my way home from there, and I'm going to make a submarine to get back. I can do that. I know I can._

* * *

BACK IN ARENDELLE…

Anna had finally deciphered Elsa's message, and she grew more and more worried as she read through it. ' _Dear Anna, Arendelle in trouble. Trying to get back, but car accident. Ended up at U.S. hospital. Linnae captured, but fine. May need to fight-drink magic water. Work together with Kristoff, Gerda, and others. All of you practice wielding water in ballroom. Should work. I believe in you, Anna. You can do this. Love, Elsa.'_ Anna bit her lip and tried not to cry. "Oh, Elsa, I don't wanna handle this by myself! I want you back here safe…"

Although Anna didn't want to do anything but go find Elsa and get her back home, she quickly went to find Kristoff and the others. The thing that worried her was that while Elsa's handwriting looked perfectly neat and not shaky or anything, Elsa hadn't said she was all right. What if Elsa was hurt bad enough that she couldn't get back on her own? What if she got scared or wouldn't defend herself again? What if… She screamed when she saw a big black…what were those things called…helicopters?...yes, a helicopter, hovering over the courtyard. Quickly drinking the 'magic water' Elsa had sent, Anna ran downstairs and out into the courtyard, only to find that the helicopter was flying off and had left Kai standing in the courtyard. "Kai! I'm so glad you're back, and-" Anna's blue-green eyes grew frightened when she realized Elsa was not with him. "Kai, where's Elsa?! Where's my sister?!" _What's going on? Kai wouldn't have left Elsa alone; I know he wouldn't. Where is she?_

Kai set Elsa's big purse and the bag of books down and just gave the princess a serious look. "She's not here, Miss Anna," he told her quietly. "Wait, please keep your mouth shut for a minute and hear me out. Then I will listen to everything you have to say. Promise."

Anna frowned, but she nodded. "O…okay…"

"We were discovered by a man I believe is Diane's old boss. Miss Elsa was coerced into cooperating because he threatened to target everyone in the United States that knew who she was and helped her." Kai gently laid his hands on Anna's shoulders when she began crying. "Princess Anna, listen to me. I think your sister will defend herself when the time's right. She worded her replies carefully to allow herself a loophole in her agreement, and I _saw_ her defend herself. The guy accused her of having anxiety issues, and she owned up to it and didn't cry or anything else. I really think she will be ok."

"But you don't _know_ ," Anna muttered sadly. "I want my sweet big sister back! You know how she is. Sometimes Elsa's all right one minute and she's having one of those awful attacks the next…" Her expression brightened a moment later as the temporary magic her sister had given her began working. She could 'feel' the way Elsa's magic felt, and while Anna thought she read traces of fear in it, it mostly seemed rather…pleased with itself?! Surely that wasn't right! That and the 'magic flow' was slightly weaker in her left hand-Elsa must be a little hurt there. But there was no sickening sensation or sad squashed feelings. Elsa was indeed fine. She was all right. "Kai, Elsa's ok! I know she is-she sent me her magic water and I can feel it!"

Kai raised his eyebrows. "Are you telling me if I drink this water Miss Elsa gave me, I will be able to sense her emotions as well?!"

Anna shrugged. "I don't know. But I can." She smiled, remembering how she'd been able to sense that those 'window panes' in the attic had been magic ice. "Kai, I've got a secret, and I'm gonna share it with you and Gerda and stuff, but I wanna tell Elsa first."

 **A/N: So yes, Elsa managed to get a message back to Anna, and she's working on getting home herself. :)**

 **Next chapter coming soon:)**


	25. Chapter 25

**A/N: Thanks to everyone who's followed/favorited and/or is reading but not reviewing:)**

 **Guest-You're right.:) Elsa just isn't very patient with herself, that's all.**

 **Elsa Tomago-Yep, Elsa will be fine.:) As far as Diane is concerned...she herself has good intentions, but she's been associated with bad people. More on that later! I think Anna's smart; she just doesn't enjoy things like that. It doesn't mean she can't...she just doesn't like it.:P**

 **FluffyKitten-Okay, the U.S. president in this story can be whoever you want him to be. I have no desire to portray real-life political figures in my story (aside from mentioning a dead one from a hundred years ago or something perhaps) because I don't want to be worrying about portraying them incorrectly. If he comes off as Obama to you, that's fine, but in my mind he is just an OC. :) Again, more on WHY people in the US believe Elsa is real later. Frozen itself is still the animated film we know (hence why Elsa wanted to know why she and Anna were so skinny and had giant eyes, lol) _. B_ ecause Elsa herself IS slender and she thinks she has big eyes, but she still wouldn't look exactly like her animated self! She would be sick. :P Glad you liked Elsa's coded messages! Yes, that is the only magic Anna can do.:) About 150 years, more or less... ;) I like writing action scenes when Elsa actually fights back (and knows what she's doing) because she would be nearly invincible if she didn't get upset! (More on Elsa's fighting capabilities soon.:)) It is modern day, BUT Arendelle is its movie self with the 1800s technology. That's why Elsa gets so fascinated with any sort of modern technology. And...I think you know what I'm going to say by now...MORE ON THAT LATER, lol... :P :)**

 **Guest-Next Dear Elsa chapter is coming up!**

 **readeronly76-Thank you!:)**

 **IndyGirl89-I just want to say thank you for the many reviews you've left on all my stories recently.:) And yes, Elsa can sort of hear spider bites...or rather, she can get rid of the venom so it'll heal faster and stuff.**

 **Olivia O-Neil-The magic ice in the attic is explained in this chapter.:) Me too, lol. Again, Elsa was okay inside with the whole issue this time because it was some random stranger threatening her, not Anna or someone else close to her. And actually successfully taking care of something almost entirely on her own made her a little more self-confident, too.:)**

 **moohamquest-Yep! Thank you:)**

 **orang biasa-Now that you mention it, I think I agree, although I didn't really do the extra 'tenseness' on purpose. :P Yes, the man is (was) Diane's boss. Elsa actually made a good prediction already, but she threw it out because she thought she was being paranoid. (Go back and rethink your thoughts, Elsa! This time you were not being overly suspicious. :) ) Good grief no, I am not writing about the illuminati or the masons or whatnot. Yikes. I have no idea how much of that is true or paranoid legend, so...yeah. No. :P That being said, something IS going on that actually has little to do with Elsa herself. She's on the outside of something looking in this time, and it'll give her and the rest of our characters a better POV than the people who NEED to figure out what's going on. Remember, Elsa can and will fight back if her friends and family or innocents she doesn't know are in danger. Oscar outright tells Elsa he can't/won't use Anna to hurt her because that gives her full reason to fight back. This means that Elsa needs to be more careful, yes, but it also means that the mysterious bad guy(s) have nothing to threaten her with that could hurt her emotionally again. No, I do not speak/write Norwegian. I wish I did! :P That's Elsa's native language, so she prefers it if at all possible, and she knows the average American won't understand it. Ingrid is a long-ago ancestor, and more about her in this chapter.:) And no, you didn't offend me at all.:)**

 **On to the story!**

By the time Elsa made it to Arendelle via her impenetrable ice submarine, it was dark. She dearly hoped Anna was home in the castle safe, not gallivanting off somewhere trying to find her or something. And she was tired. Very, very tired. Maybe she would get a good night's sleep in her own bed tonight before dealing with whatever was going on. Once she was on the shore, she dissolved the submarine and limped slowly toward the castle gate. _Come on, Elsa, you're almost home._

The guard at the gate immediately recognized Elsa and let her into the courtyard. "Welcome home, Queen Elsa," he called.

"Thank you," Elsa replied, happy to be speaking her own language again after speaking mostly just English for the past couple days. She managed to get herself to the front steps before just collapsing. She was so, so tired-from what, she didn't know. Maybe it was because she was hurt.

The guard hesitated before leaving his post, making sure the gate was locked. "Queen Elsa?" He quickly scooped Elsa up and carried her inside, handing her to Gerda before returning to his post. "I'm not sure what happened to her, ma'am. Think she might be just really exhausted."

Gerda thanked the guard and then immediately carried Elsa upstairs to her room. _Elsa's probably just exhausted. She's all scraped up, but Kai already explained what happened, and she seems fine otherwise._ "I don't know what happened to you after Kai had to leave, Miss Elsa, but you're safe at home now," she said quietly.

Elsa just blinked up at Gerda tiredly, faint dark circles beneath her blue eyes. "Home?" she mumbled hopefully.

"Yes, Miss Elsa, you're home," Gerda assured her.

Elsa relaxed and smiled at Gerda. "I got home by myself. And I tore up all that mean ol' Oscar's IDs," she informed Gerda. She seemed to wake up a bit more as Gerda laid her down on her bed. "Gerda, I…I defended myself. D'you think Anna will be p-proud of m-me?" Elsa asked softly. "Even though things went wrong?" _I hope so. I got home by myself. I'm not helpless, even though I'm…me._ Elsa's blue eyes were bright with tears; she _so_ wanted to make Anna proud of her and not all…worried about her, or feeling bad for her or whatever else.

"Oh, Miss Elsa, I'm sure she will be," Gerda assured Elsa, gently stroking her platinum hair. "For whatever it's worth, _I'm_ proud of you. You did a good job. I saw the note you sent your sister. Careful coding; backup plans in case you didn't get back quick enough. Yes, Miss Elsa, I'd say you did a very good job. I'd just like to ask you one thing, though. Why is your whole torso hard as a rock? And stiff?"

Elsa's tired eyes twinkled at that. "Bulletproof ice. Not very comfortable, but I needed it. I got shot at point-blank range and I was perfectly fine, just shaken." She dispelled her armor and sighed in relief. While the ice had done its job and protected her, it had _not_ been comfortable. She would have to come up with a better design next time.

Gerda frowned, more than a little worried about how Elsa talked about being shot like it was no big deal. Bulletproof ice or not, whoever had done that could have ended up hitting her somewhere she hadn't armored with her ice. Elsa's ice might be bulletproof, but her body was not. "I do wonder if you could somehow make bulletproof vests for our guards and soldiers and the like. That would be very, very useful in a fight," she said finally. "Perhaps impenetrable ice filings between two pieces of fabric or something, I don't know, since you said what you made for yourself wasn't comfortable."

Elsa smiled at that. "I think that I could try to make something like that, but I'd need your help."

* * *

A minute later, Anna ran into the room, her dress dripping wet from practicing directing her temporary water powers with everyone else in the ballroom. "Kai said you were back, Elsa! I'm so glad you're home!" she said happily.

Elsa slowly sat up and hugged her little sister as tightly as she could, not caring that Anna was getting her, the comforter, and the floor all wet. "You figured out my message," she whispered. _Anna is okay. She's fine. I did not get back too late to help. We just need to help Ms. Diane search for any of those weird tracking things on her belongings and then destroy it if/when we find one._ "Anna, I've got to go to Ms. Diane's house-there are these weird tracking things and bad people could find her and-"

"Elsa, you're hurt. You need to sleep now," Anna interrupted, frowning as she gently touched the bandage on her sister's temple. "There are bad scrapes and stuff all over you!" she exclaimed, scowling at Elsa's right arm. "And that, what is that?!" Anna asked, pointing at Elsa's sprained wrist. "And you just look tired besides!"

"Didn't Kai tell you? We got in a car accident and my side of the vehicle got all smashed. I think I'm lucky I didn't get hurt worse. Really, Anna, it looks worse than it is, I promise," Elsa tried to reassure Anna. "There's nothing broken, just nasty bruises and scrapes and a sprained wrist. I'm fine. Honestly." She paused before adding, "I know they have more technology things there, but I did _not_ like being in that hospital at all. There are these machine devices that measure your pulse and these tube things called IVs that give you medicine right into your arm and other things like that and they make weird little noises constantly and you can't sleep."

This made Anna frown again. "First, you always say you're fine even when you aren't, so I don't entirely believe you. And while I'm glad there were doctor people that helped you, I don't like it that you couldn't sleep well there. So go to sleep now," she replied firmly.

"Anna, I _can't._ I _am_ tired, very, very tired, honestly, but I've got to go warn Ms. Diane and help her go through her things to make sure both her-and us, for that matter-are safe from those strange tracking things. I…I think I need some help?" Elsa's voice sounded slightly questioning, as if she weren't sure one way or the other. Elsa slowly sat up, and Anna quickly put her arm around her shoulders and helped her stand up. "Thank you, Anna," she said quietly. _Elsa, get yourself together. Tough luck that you're tired. Anna will help you._

Anna bit her lip as she helped Elsa walk out of her room and start down the hall. Every step was a bit tentative, and Anna thought Elsa might just curl up right there on the floor and go to sleep if Anna hadn't been helping her. "Elsa, make a sled or something and I'll pull you instead. You seem _really_ tired. Too tired to be walking around," Anna told her, figuring Elsa would probably much prefer that over being carried or something.

Sure enough, the second the icy sled (filled with soft powdery snow) formed, Elsa almost instantly fell asleep curled up in the snow. Anna frowned before nudging her sister's shoulder gently. "Elsa? Elsa, I can't operate your ice-elevator, remember? And…" Anna looked to Gerda for help. "Gerda, what am I s'posed to do? I can't go take care of this by myself 'cause I don't know what I'm looking for, and Elsa's just plain too tired to do anything…"

Gerda shook her head and just picked a sleeping Elsa up. "Well, it doesn't matter whether you know or not, because your sister is going to be near useless to help at the moment anyway. She's too tired, and I can hardly blame her. If you don't mind, I'll just go tuck Miss Elsa into bed in your room since you got all the sheets all wet in her own. You could take Kai, Kristoff and Nikoleta with you to Ms. Diane's and send Anikka and Eliot back upstairs. I'll babysit them and keep an eye on Miss Elsa too. I imagine Ms. Diane knows what to be looking for. Take that book about such things with you. It's a bit bent up and the like, but still perfectly readable." Gerda thought for a moment before adding, "It may not be a good idea to let Ms. Diane know about the temporary water powers, so perhaps all of you change out of those wet clothes first."

* * *

Elsa awoke very, very early in the morning sandwiched between Anikka and Anna, both of them hugging her tightly. The pressure made her bruised ribs hurt, but all the same, it made her feel happy and content and just… _safe_. They didn't think she was some inhuman creature and want to run experiments on her or use her for a weapon. They were just holding her. She remembered how Katie had treated her and hoped she might be able to see the little girl again someday. She remembered the older lady that had given her the light denim jacket because she'd thought Elsa was cold. That lady wouldn't have hurt her if she'd figured out who she was, either. She was sure of it. _I defended myself when I needed to, too. I really did. Was…was that okay?_

Elsa carefully turned on her side and put her arm around Anikka before scooting closer to Anna. She was safe at home now. If she had to fight to protect her country and the people in it, it would be with her family and friends by her side. She would not go back to the United States, not ever. She would wait here, and if anyone wanted a fight, then so be it. If Anna had not managed to destroy the tracking things without her help, then she would leave them be. Because she had something no one else would have, and whether that was good or bad, it could not be taken from her. So there.

It was just…she wanted so dearly to just be… _normal_. She didn't want her position or her magic or her weak leg or anything else about herself. She wanted a chance to just be _Elsa_. Not Nicolette, not Queen Elsa, not a…a defective freak. Sure, she knew 'normal' should be _all_ of those things before, but Anna fit in with everyone and she was still able to just be herself. 'Real' Anna fit in. 'Real' Elsa did not, and never would. _I'm jealous. Not a lot, but a little,_ Elsa thought to herself, feeling bad because she'd admitted that to herself. What would Anna think?! What would _anyone_ think?! She had no right to feel like that, none at all.

Anna jerked awake when she felt Elsa stirring beside her. "Hey, Elsa, are you ok?" she asked quietly. She lit the kerosene lamp on her nightstand so they could both see. Anna frowned when she saw Elsa's expression. There were hurt tears in her eyes, and yet she seemed frustrated and angry. "What's wrong? D'you need to talk, or do you just need a great big hug 'til you feel better?"

Elsa struggled with herself for a minute before finally blurting, "You'll hate me if I explain myself. It's stupid."

"No, I won't, and you know it." An idea popped into Anna's head, and she smiled. "Elsa, you look a lot less tired now, and there's a surprise I wanna show you anyways. Something I wanna tell you, too. Would you like to see and hear it now?"

Elsa hesitated before nodding. "What about Anikka, though?"

"I'll take her to Nikoleta's room. She can stay in there. You stay here. I'll be right back."

"I promise I won't let you run into anything," Anna said a few minutes later as she took her sister by the hand. "Don't open your eyes 'til I say you can. And no peeking!"

Elsa yelped as she tripped over something in the middle of Anna's floor and nearly fell. She didn't open her eyes, but she clutched Anna's hand tighter. "Can't I just close my eyes when we get to wherever you're taking me?" she asked a little while later. "I don't like worrying I'm going to trip over something every second."

Anna huffed a bit, but she agreed. "I guess you'd figure out where we were going the second we got…here," she said.

"The attic?" Elsa carefully started up the steep stairs into the attic, glad that Anna was behind her. Anna wouldn't let her fall. Sure enough, a second later Elsa's braced leg missed the next step, and she scrunched her eyes shut, trying not to get mad or upset at herself. _Elsa, it's been ages since you've been that way. Get used to it. You are not good at stairs and that's that._

"There's just a few more, Elsa," Anna told her. "You can do it. I know you can."

Soon both girls were in the attic, and Elsa shut her eyes per Anna's request. Elsa gasped when she touched what Anna had put in her hands. "A-Anna, I…I d-don't know what this is, b-but…it's…it's…it's…" she stuttered in surprise. _This is derived from someone else's ice magic. I can feel it!_ She ran a finger over the old ice 'glass pane' in her lap, subconsciously tracing out her own signature snowflake. Even with her eyes still shut, Elsa saw the tremendously bright flash and both felt and heard the familiar _cr-rackle_ her own ice magic made. Elsa couldn't keep her eyes shut any longer; she _had_ to look.

Anna just sat figuratively frozen at what had just happened, clutching one hand to her chest. For a split second, she'd been touching the old magic ice at the same time as Elsa, and that had been enough to give her hand a slight 'cold burn'. Whatever had happened, whatever these were for, it was something for Elsa-or another natural ice mage-and no one else. Anna was suddenly sure that her slight, ever so slight, ability to detect the ice powers that ran in her family had protected her from being badly hurt from touching the old ice when it had been 'activated'.

Elsa just stared at the thing in her lap, her blue eyes wide. _It's something of Ingrid's. I know it is._ "Anna, I…" Elsa's gaze flitted to the words etched in the old ice-written clearly in it, just like she could do herself. _'I do not even know why I've been doing this. Who will ever even be able to read it? Another poor freak descendant of mine years and years from now? I wouldn't want to wish this on anyone, except perhaps my worst enemy. This cell is miserable. I chose to build it myself, but I cannot live here forever. I will do it soon, and I will not fail this time. There is no point any longer; Eystein is old enough now to take over himself. He is all I have left now. Wherever you are, Celeritas, Stormr, I hope I will see you again. I cannot take back what I did, but I think of you every day.'_ Elsa dropped the ice and scrambled backwards away from it as she burst into tears. "Anna, Ingrid…she…she killed two people she cared about a-and…and she wrote she was going to…t-to kill herself soon, and…"

Anna just put her arms around Elsa and hugged her close. _What if sharing what we found with Elsa wasn't a good idea? Seems like all it's done is made her upset. Wait…of course I had to share it with her. Elsa deserves to know about her family just as much as I do, all the more so since Ingrid had magic, just like her._ "Elsa, why don't we try to put the old ice panes of magic in order tomorrow? I got a happier thing to share with you, and you still need to tell me why you were all mad and upset before we came up here."

"It's dumb," Elsa replied softly as she slowly stood up and looked at the pile of 'window panes' back on the shelf. _The oldest one is probably on the bottom in the far back…_ She carefully slid the pane she wanted out and sat back down on the floor next to Anna, tracing her snowflake out as she did so to reveal the writing. "Here, let's read together instead."

"Can I pretty please tell you what I wanted to tell you first?" Anna begged, her blue-green eyes sparkling excitedly. Elsa nodded, so Anna went on, "I have got a trace of magic of my own! We all found those old ice panes up here while you were gone-Eliot knocked some down by accident and we all thought it was weird that they didn't break-but nobody knew they were magic. Nobody but me! I could feel it, Elsa. So I'm…I'm a little bit like you," she finished happily. "I think it's just that I can sense the ice magic that runs in our family, though. Not other magic. I wonder if Rapunzel's magic would count as 'family'? I dunno."

But instead of smiling or something else like that, Elsa's whole countenance seemed to crumple. _Why would she want to be like me? If what Anna's saying is true-and I do believe her-she's delighted that she's not really 'normal'. Why can't I just be happy the way I am? That's selfish. Anna would probably be thrilled if she thought she might have ice powers like me._

Anna was puzzled by Elsa's reaction; she'd figured Elsa would be happy to know she wasn't the only one, even if Anna's 'magic' was next to nothing. "Elsa, you are acting very weird," Anna said after a moment. "Very un-Elsa-like. What is wrong? I shan't leave you alone about it 'til you tell me. And I promise I won't get mad at you or think you're bad or stupid or anything else."

"Anna, I…" _Just tell her, Elsa. You can trust Anna. Anna is not going to hate you for it._ "I feel jealous of you," she blurted, instantly regretting saying that. It made her sound like a selfish brat. That was rotten. "I'm sorry…"

To Elsa's surprise, Anna just began laughing as she gave her sister a reassuring smile. "Oh, Elsa, is _that_ all?! Why would I think bad of you for that? You're human, remember? Feeling jealous of someone or something is normal. Not good, of course, but normal. But _why_ , Elsa? That's my question. I just don't understand why you'd be-" Anna abruptly cut herself off, suddenly realizing why Elsa might feel that way. When she saw Elsa's reaction right then, she immediately knew her realization was right. Elsa's blue eyes were filled with tears, and she had scooted away further into the eerie shadows of the attic.

 _I don't have any reason to feel this way. I don't. I just don't. I'm not_ supposed _to be treated like a normal girl my age, because I'm not. I can't be jealous of Anna for being able to be like any other girl near our ages._ All Elsa could think of was the way her parents had treated her for so long. She genuinely didn't hold a grudge toward them for it, but it still made her upset and she couldn't help thinking that they'd managed to treat Anna properly. Just not her. She was the problem, not them. And she could _never_ be 'normal', never ever, no matter how hard she tried. "It's not even my magic so much, really…it's…it's other stupid things like not being able to socialize properly and my leg and other things like that," she said softly. "I…I want to be able to be _me_ and still…fit in. Like you do."

Anna frowned and tugged Elsa back into the lighted part of the attic. "First, I think it's about time you felt a bit selfish about something. That means you're getting better inside, because you have a bit more self-worth whether you think so or not. So there," she said firmly. "I didn't say it was a _good_ thing to feel like that-it's bad-but I don't think it makes you a horrible person or something. It's normal. Does that make sense…?" Anna wasn't entirely sure how to help, because it was kind of complicated. Feeling a little selfish and jealous in of itself were bad things, but they were _normal_. Elsa was a human girl just like her; she was _supposed_ to feel like that sometimes. In fact, Anna was honestly glad Elsa said that because that meant she wasn't considering herself completely worthless anymore.

Except Elsa messed up this train of thought by saying just then, "But I shouldn't feel like that. I'm…I'm not worth anything better than what Papa gave me. I…I'm messed up." She had her arms wrapped around her middle hugging herself, her eyes cast down deep in thought. _I don't understand, Anna. I'm bad for feeling like that, but I'm not a terrible person or something? I feel stupid for not understanding. I don't even understand how I feel in the first place; it doesn't make any sense._

Anna sighed. "That is very, very stupid and wrong, Elsa, and you know it! You can't let Dad's actions when we were little make you think like that. You can't. Elsa. Elsa, look at me." She scowled when Elsa wouldn't meet her eyes and just hugged her tightly instead. "What Dad did to you was wrong, and I think deep inside you know that and don't want to admit it because he's our father and you still love him very much." _And 'cause he treated Elsa like dirt as a child and she grew up like that. I can't erase that._ Anna's eyes filled with angry tears as she clutched Elsa close. If Elsa had grown up being treated properly, maybe she wouldn't be jealous of her little sister being able to be herself and be 'normal', because she wouldn't consider herself messed up in the first place. She abruptly pushed Elsa away and then dragged her to her feet. "You know what? You _are_ messed up, if you look at it a certain-stupid!-way. You are not supposed to have those nasty panicking episodes; you are not supposed to have a weak leg; you are not supposed to have trouble with your magic. But you know what else? People who matter _don't care_! And the 'normal' thing depends on your definition of the dumb word, 'kay? According to the dictionary definition, you are not normal. Neither am I, or Rapunzel, or Eliot, or your friend Nikoleta. I don't think _anyone_ is 'normal' according to the dictionary definition. I think people force themselves to be dictionary-normal and they really aren't. 'Normal' should be being _yourself_ , magic, emotional issues, bad leg, and all. Those things don't define you. You know that in your head, but I don't think your heart does." Anna paused for a second before asking hesitantly, "Elsa, why do you dislike yourself so much in the first place? I know Dad made you like that, but you've got your own brain, and you're smart. Why…why can't you separate Dad's mean, stupid opinions from _yours_? What do you think of when you first think about _just plain Elsa_? Not what she's supposed to be, what she is?"

Elsa thought for a long time before answering. She honestly agreed with Anna's opinions on the whole 'normal' thing, but she couldn't explain herself. When she really considered it, what she thought of when she thought of 'just plain Elsa' was a young girl nicknamed the Snow Queen that happened to have emotional problems, loved her family and her people very much, hated socializing, liked reading, and would happily enjoy a good thrill, assuming it was a calculated risk and not something dangerously stupid. _Wait a second…I didn't think about horrible things about me. And I didn't think about my bad leg at all. I did think about my magic and those…issues, but just as a characteristic, just like anything else…_ "I think…I think maybe I don't know how," she said slowly. "Papa's…not good opinions are what I grew up with, so I guess maybe I just fall back on them? I'm not sure…Anna, I…I…oh, I don't know how to put this. I guess…even though it'll be a year since I got you back and learned-relearned-the key to controlling my powers on my birthday in a little over a month, it's still _really_ hard for me to believe everything isn't going to just go back the way it was and it's not just some crazy dream. It feels like it's too good to be real or true. I think…I think that might be why the bad events that have happened since then still hurt…I don't know. That prob'ly sounds stupid…" Elsa's voice trailed off, unsure what else to say. _I confuse myself. I've probably confused Anna, too._

"One good year isn't anywhere near enough to outweigh thirteen awful ones, for one thing. And we've had a _lot_ of ups and downs in that one year, too! You haven't had a chance to just relax and heal inside; you've just gotten tossed into one crazy thing after another," Anna pointed out.

"But I shouldn't let things that aren't my or your or anyone else's fault affect me! Like that cave incident? I _still_ feel a bit scared of being stuck somewhere without my brace so I can't walk. I'm not particularly freaking out every second about the possibility like I did before, but still. And…and I _know_ you don't hate me and you won't get rid of me, but…" Elsa took a deep breath before finishing, "…but sometimes I worry about the idea that you might not _want_ me anymore. That you might just take care of stupid, broken Elsa just because you think you're s-supposed t-to." Tears ran down Elsa's cheeks, and she couldn't bring herself to meet Anna's eyes. "I-I…I'd understand that. It…it would just hurt." _A lot. I don't know what I would do._ Elsa felt frost crawling up her arms, and tiny snowflakes floated around her.

"Elsa, I get why you might think that, but it's not true. I wouldn't trade you for anything, whether I was 'supposed' to take care of you or not. You're my best friend. If I didn't want you, why would I spend time with you in the first place? If I was tired of you or something, I could tell a servant to go 'bother with you'. You'd still be being taken care of, so I'd be doing what I was 'supposed to'. No, no, no, Elsa, I _like_ to 'bother with you'. 'Cause you're my big sister and my best friend. Taking care of each other when you don't have to is what friends do. So there." Anna paused before adding, "Gerda told me what you did to get back, Elsa. I'm _very_ proud of you. I knew you were all right because of the temporary magic water you sent me, but I was still worried. Just less so." She suddenly remembered what Elsa had said before, that poisoned-Anna's words were probably based in truth, and her stomach twisted. She sighed as she took Elsa by the hand. "The rottenest things I've EVER thought about you were when I was fairly little. Maybe nine or so. Gerda kept spending her salary on things for you, and I got really mad and told her you were probably taking advantage of her somehow and that Mom and Dad oughta lock you up for being bad and mean and ignoring me. I remember Gerda actually just left and didn't say anything and she was crying. Usually she'd scold me if I was naughty. Later she brought me a little wooden snowflake puzzle and said I could be mad at her if I wanted but to please keep talking to you." Anna was crying as she finished, "She said you were hurting and needed help no one was giving." She could feel Elsa's hand shaking; the older girl was trembling all over and she looked terrified. _Why did I tell Elsa that? I wanted her to know the truth, but…_ "Elsa, are…are you going to be all right?" Anna asked hesitantly.

"N...n-no…" Elsa just shook her head and pulled her hand away before heading for the attic steps and scrambling down as fast as she could. A few stairs before the bottom, she slipped and fell, and immediately pulled herself to her feet, knowing Anna would just follow her. Blinded by tears, she put up a wall of snow to slow Anna down and just limped away as fast as she could. _I don't even know where I'm going. What am I doing?_

* * *

Anna called for Elsa to wait, but the older girl wasn't listening. She dug through the snow as fast as she could, but by the time Anna had gotten into the upstairs hallway, Elsa was nowhere in sight. And there were no ice footprints to show where Elsa had gone, either. For the first time in her life, Anna wished Elsa had lost control when she was upset. She had to find Elsa. She had to. _Elsa was really, really upset. What if she hurts herself or something and I can't find her?_ On instinct, Anna closed her eyes and concentrated on the awful magic sensation inside her that she knew was from Elsa's emotions. _Well, she's terrified. And hurt. And upset. And…wait. The air in the hallway up here is cooler than it should be. I can't detect exact temperatures like Elsa can, but I can sense general changes that shouldn't be there. Duh._

With that thought, Anna set off down the hall, checking every room as she went, even though she was sure Elsa wasn't there. "Elsa, please be ok," she muttered aloud. Anna started downstairs and followed the fading 'trail' of cold air to…the stairs down into the dungeons? _This can't be right! Why would Elsa come down here?!_ She hesitated before pushing the door open and heading down the steps. There was no guard down here, except for in front of Hans's cell, and that was only one. Anna frowned and took a deep breath before marching up to the guard, clutching her candle tightly. "Has there been any commotion down here in the last few minutes?" she asked.

The guard looked apologetic and a bit frightened. "No," he blurted slightly too quickly, but Anna didn't notice.

Anna scowled and marched off. "That was _not_ helpful!" she exclaimed. Her blue-green eyes grew big when she heard muffled cries from somewhere down the corridor, and she took off running. There wasn't supposed to be anyone down here but Hans, Espen, and the guard. That crying sounded suspiciously like Elsa. _I know where Elsa is._ Without hesitation, Anna chose the door to the cell where Elsa had been trapped before and tried to push it open, but it was…stuck? Why was the door stuck?! When she peeked through the bars on the door, she could see Elsa curled up in the corner with her knees pulled to her chest, rocking back and forth slightly as she continued crying. Elsa's blue slippers and her brace lay discarded on the dirty stone floor beside her. _Wait…I can't go in there. I'll make it worse. I gotta go get Gerda. She'd help. Elsa came down here 'cause I made her think it was where she belonged, I know that's why._

All Elsa could think of was what Anna had told her upstairs. She clearly remembered Gerda doing that; it had been shortly after her parents had seemingly completely given up on her when she was twelve and her magic had abruptly grown stronger very quickly. Gerda had gone and bought her books and toys and clips for her hair and other things like that after twelve-year-old Elsa had completely shut down all verbal contact for days, hoping the gestures might get through to Elsa where words hadn't. Elsa's twelve-year-old self had spent hours and hours curled up on her bed shaking and trying unsuccessfully not to cry, ice crawling all over the wall in the process. She remembered Anna saying some nasty things one day, now that Anna had reminded her of it; present-Elsa had completely forgotten. _She was nine. She didn't mean it. Elsa, stop crying. That's actually a good explanation. It should make you feel_ better _that you know where those horrible things poisoned-Anna said came from, not worse. What is wrong with you?_

 _And…why did Gerda do that for me?_ Although a lot of that time was just a sad and frightened blur to Elsa now, she could remember Gerda staying with her in her room all the time for about a week or so, not even leaving to go get meals. Gerda had made Kai bring food for both herself and Elsa to the room, and then been very upset when twelve-year-old Elsa couldn't bring herself to eat anything or do her lessons or even get up. Between being terrified and upset about her magic growing stronger and knowing Anna was mad at her, she hadn't been able to function at all until her magic had quieted down slightly, if she could even call it that. She remembered Gerda sitting in a chair somewhat near her bed-just not _too_ close-and refusing to leave her alone. Gerda had draped several warm blankets over her, hoping the warmth might help her magic calm down. Elsa hadn't even been able to feel it. Looking back now, Elsa knew the blankets hadn't helped at all; it was Gerda's love and kindness toward her that had helped her 'snap out of it', even if it wasn't even close to fixing her. She wished her younger self hadn't been so _stupid_ …she should have realized that love was the answer then.

 _I am not making Gerda have to do that sort of thing for me ever again. That is not her job. And Anna is SUPPOSED to be mean to me once in awhile. So there, stupid paranoid Elsa. That does_ not _mean she hates you or doesn't want you or anything else like that. Get up and go upstairs. Now._ Elsa scowled as she glanced at her bad leg. Gerda spent far too much time trying to mend her, whether it was physical things like her leg or internal things like emotions she didn't know how to deal with. Gerda had _always_ taken care of her…even when no one else even could. She would not make Gerda do that any more than she had already. With that thought, Elsa wiped her tears away and then dragged herself to her feet determinedly. Keeping one hand on the stone wall to steady herself, she quickly iced over the floor and then the walls and ceiling with opaque blue ice. She had destroyed those horrible shackles months ago; now she would get rid of every sign of what this place had been to her. She knew _exactly_ what she was going to do with this cell-no, room. It was just a room now. A rather pretty room at that, with shining ice on the walls.

A moment later, there were shimmering ice-curtains over the window, hiding the bars behind it. Soft snow covered the stone 'bed' on one side of the room, and she awkwardly hopped over to it and flopped down in the snow. Elsa's redecorating had turned the old nasty, lonely cell into a cozy and cool retreat. _This place cannot hurt me anymore. So there._ When she stood up again and tried to hop back over to where she'd left her brace and her slippers, she lost her balance and fell, but this time it didn't bother her or scare her. She just strapped the brace back on her leg and slipped her slippers back on before leaving the room, making sure to leave the ugly cell door alone so no one would suspect what she had done. It would be her secret, at least for now.

 **A/N: Yay, Elsa's back home :)**

 **For anyone that doesn't know/figured out already, Ingrid is the girls' great-great-great grandmother, who lived about 150 or so years before them.:)**

 **Next chapter coming soon!**


	26. Chapter 26

**A/N: Thanks to everyone who's followed/favorited and/or is reading but not reviewing!**

 **readeronly76-Thank you!:)**

 **FluffyKitten-Yeah, Elsa's father really, really hurt her inside.:/ She just needs lots of TLC, though, I think. Anna telling her those things wasn't helpful, even though Anna was just trying to tell her the truth. And yes, Elsa IS getting better at dealing with her emotions. :) Be immortal, I guess? :P Lol, the more I think about it, Elsa is really, really powerful whether she likes it or not. The more comfortable she becomes in her own skin, the easier it will be for her to discover new things she can do. :) Yep, the Gerda and Kai are like the girls' parents headcanon is one I like very much. :) And yep, Elsa literally got rid of the nasty cell.:)**

 **Olivia O'Neil-Well, at least it let Elsa's worries about where poisoned-Anna's thoughts came from go away. :) I'm glad Elsa's home safe too. And Elsa will probably go read more of Ingrid's "diary" ice sometime soon. :)**

 **Elsa Tomago-Anna was just trying to tell Elsa the truth...which wasn't helpful at all, aside from helping put Elsa's worries about where poisoned-Anna's thoughts came from to rest. Elsa's okay now-it just made her really upset temporarily. Elsa and Anna will talk in this chapter.:)**

 **orang biasa-Poor Elsa is a little TOO dependent on what Anna says. :/ She just automatically thought that if Anna had said/thought those things about her, then they must be true. Silly girl just needs someone to comfort her and reassure her otherwise sometimes. :) Lol, and what's really funny is that Elsa has never even heard of kevlar and obviously wouldn't know what that is! :P (And her impenetrable ice is technically _stronger_ than kevlar if you think about it...) She just needs to figure out how to make armor that doesn't just work for her, since obviously an ordinary human can't wear ice, even if it's just Elsa's cool-not-cold ice.**

 **IndyGirl89-Thank you again for all the reviews!:) And yeah...I'd LOVE Elsa to make me a pool! Pools are expensive, and she made one easily and quickly and it cost her nothing. XD**

 **On to the story!:) (Yikes, this is a long chapter...sorry. :/ )**

Before going back upstairs, Elsa instructed the guard that he was under strict orders not to let _anyone_ pass and go down the dungeon corridor. "Not even Princess Anna," she added, knowing Anna could overrule the guard if she wanted to, but not if he had direct orders from Elsa otherwise.

The guard was a bit confused; he'd seen Elsa come down the hall before when she was all upset, but she seemed back to her usual self now. "Very well, your majesty," he said simply. He was used to both royal sisters not exactly acting very queenly or princess-y, so he wasn't surprised. Well, maybe a little surprised that usually-dignified-in-public Elsa had come down here in her nightgown in the first place, but whatever. The queen could do as she liked.

Elsa said thank-you and began heading back upstairs to the main floor of the castle. She nearly jumped out of her skin when Gerda suddenly hugged her close. "Gerda, I…what's going on? Is everything okay?"

"From the way your sister was talking, I thought there was something very wrong! But you seem fine. Are you sure you're all right, Miss Elsa? What on earth were you doing in the dungeon?" Gerda asked. She frowned when she saw what Elsa was wearing. "Miss Elsa, that's fine upstairs, but I don't think you should come downstairs dressed like that, if you'll pardon my saying so. Now go back to bed for a couple hours. It's only five thirty in the morning. You can sleep a little longer, duties to take care of or no."

* * *

Gerda went upstairs with Elsa to make sure she really did go back to bed. Although she obviously wasn't exhausted anymore, Gerda still didn't want to risk Elsa making herself all tired again, and there was no way she wasn't still at least a little sore from that car accident.

Elsa hesitated in front of the door to her own room. "Will Anna mind if I come back? I kind of disappeared for no reason and she might be mad at me," she said quietly. _Elsa, stop it. You did not disappear for_ no _reason, just not a very good one. Snap out of it. And apologize to Gerda._ "I'm sorry you've always had to…t-to take care of me, Gerda. You…I…I just remembered when I was twelve and you stayed with me for days and-"

"Miss Elsa, don't apologize for that," Gerda interrupted gently. Anna had already explained what had happened when the girls had been talking up in the attic, and so Gerda already knew what had made Elsa upset…and probably why she was apologizing for something that had happened nine years before that really wasn't her fault in the first place. "You weren't even a teenager yet; you were just a little kid. That was not your fault, so don't apologize for it."

"But you didn't have to stay with me," Elsa countered. "And you stayed with me even after I told you to go away. I…I really didn't want you to leave, but…I…I s-said that 'cause I was scared, and…I don't know. Why…why did you s-stay with me when I didn't even _say_ anything for days?!" she cried, tears filling her eyes again despite her very best efforts not to let that happen yet again.

Gerda led Elsa into her room and just went to sit in the comfy chair in the corner, holding Elsa close. "Because that scared little girl locked in her room needed _someone_ to actually take care of her, even if it was just a servant. I loved you very much, Miss Elsa, and I still do. I only wish we had all managed to figure out what would help you control your magic back then." She paused before adding, "And don't tell me you aren't worth loving or taking care of. Love doesn't judge someone's worth; it doesn't matter at all one way or the other. And, Miss Elsa? Quite honestly, I know it's rather not my place to say this, but you are like the daughter I never had. You and your sister both." Gerda had had a baby once when she was just a bit older than Elsa was now, but it had been stillborn, and she hadn't been married either, so it was just as well. She couldn't have taken care of it then. But she had her castle job, the same one she'd had since she was sixteen; Agdar's father, the previous king, hadn't fired her when she'd gotten pregnant, saying she was too trusted and reliable to let go despite that. Years passed, and when Agdar and Idun had their first child, she had instantly adored baby Elsa. She could not understand how two new parents could treat their baby girl like they had treated Elsa, 'different' or not. Elsa's life was precious. They should not have been wanting to get rid of her, even temporarily.

Now she had _two_ sweet girls to take care of, more if she counted Elsa's friends. Gerda smiled a bit as she felt Elsa relax in her arms; the girl was quickly falling asleep. _Elsa will be fine. I know she will._

Elsa still had tears streaking her cheeks, but her expression was completely calm; she actually had a tiny smile on her face now. "The past is in the past," she mumbled. "Gerda…thank…you…" _I still don't understand why Gerda did that, but she makes me happy all the same._

Gerda kept holding Elsa until she was sure she was completely asleep before tucking her back into bed. She gently rested Elsa's hurt wrist on a pillow and then brushed a stray wisp of hair away from her face before turning to leave. _No, thank_ you _, Elsa. Helping you feel better is the least I can do._ Gerda jumped when she heard a quiet, sleepy voice behind her.

"Will you stay? Please?" Elsa's big blue eyes blinked hopefully at Gerda, and she reached for the two dolls Anna had given her for her birthday the year before and hugged them close. Big Anna didn't hate her. Little nine-year-old Anna hadn't hated her either. She'd just been childishly mad because Gerda had given broken little twelve-year-old Elsa presents and she hadn't gotten any. That was all. Elsa actually found herself trying to stifle sleepy giggles as Gerda sat down beside her. _It's actually kind of a testament to how much Anna really does care that the absolute worst thing that fire magic could pull from Anna was based from a childish tantrum! Good grief, Elsa, you are so stupid! You got all upset and scared for nothing! Absolutely nothing._ She knew she wouldn't start worrying about the possibility of Anna not wanting her or something again. Not unless she was already frightened from something else. So there. She slept peacefully until it was time to get up a couple hours later.

* * *

After breakfast, Elsa sent Anna to read the books she had bought in the U.S., saying, "And please come tell me if you come across anything especially important." Elsa herself retreated to the study to try to catch up on replying to all the letters stacking up on her desk there. Kai or Gerda or someone always left them in the study for her, personal ones in one pile and potentially important ones in another. There were only two in the 'potentially important' pile, one from the Southern Isles and one from her parents in Weselton. _I'll take care of these first._ "Oh, this is just from Kiara!" Elsa said to herself happily as she opened the Southern Isles one. Kiara had carefully written the address on the outside in block letters, but Elsa easily recognized her friend's handwriting the second she opened it. Elsa's smile disappeared as she read Kiara's message.

 _'Hi Snow Queen Elsa! I'm sorry I haven't written sooner. There is something weird going on here, and nobody will say what it is. Somebody's after my parents. They were poisoned and got sick (not dead, though!), and now my oldest brother is in charge. I thought maybe he did it because honestly none of my brothers are very nice, but I_ know _he didn't. I just do. People are blaming me for it because it happened right after I came back. I'm leaving again, and I'll be stopping in Arendelle probably a day or two after you read this. I hate it at 'home' in the Southern Isles. I may still be a princess in name, but I'm not, really. Anyways, I just wanted you to know something weird is going on. All us 'backward' countries are being targeted or investigated or something, I don't know. Either that or there're crazy fanatic people after us. I don't know. I miss you. Your friend, Princess (yeah right) Kiara of the Southern Isles'_

Elsa smiled when she realized just when her friend had sent this. According to her logic, Kiara would be there _today_ , maybe! She wanted to be right at the dock when Kiara arrived, but she knew that wasn't practical; she had no idea what ship Kiara was on or when it would arrive or anything. Oh well. She would just give Kiara a great big hug the second she saw her, whether Kiara wanted one or not. Elsa stroked Kolfinnia gently after the half-grown cat jumped up on her lap. "I can't play with you right now, Kolfinnia," she told the cat.

Kolfinnia just blinked at her and curled up on her lap.

Moving on to her parents' letter, Elsa frowned. There were actually _two_ letters in the envelope, one written in the code her father had taught her when she was thirteen ("This is specifically for Arendelle monarchs and their next-in-line, no one else," he'd told her.), and one in normal writing. It was simple enough that it wouldn't take ages to decode like the message she had sent Anna, and complicated enough that most petty snoopers wouldn't bother. A single number-letter combination was written underneath the stamp, and that was used to decode the whole message. If 3 equaled E, then you counted back to A and knew A equaled 25. If Y equaled, say, 2, then A equaled 4. Tedious, but not difficult at all. Since Elsa knew her father would have encrypted the letter better if it were _too_ serious, she wasn't much concerned with the code. She quickly wet the stamp and peeled it off, revealing the tiny '4=C' written beneath. Okay. Elsa quickly scribbled down what each number stood for and then filled in the words in neat letters above their numbers in the message. After she was done, she would burn the whole thing.

 _'Elsa. You must be careful. Reason to believe there's conspiracy. Heard rumors, bad ones. Americans have moved here. Most welcome, but few I do not. May not even be loyal Americans, honestly. Very strange. Do_ not _be your merciful self too much. Other letter should wait. They want you to participate that bad; they'll wait. It sounds asinine, but is definitely not trap. Thought should know. Your father. I do miss you.'_ Elsa was not bothered by the curtness of most of the message; it was her father, after all, and coded messages were not supposed to be particularly friendly; they were to transfer information. And he had said he missed her! He didn't have to do that. That made her smile and feel all warm and happy inside. _Papa actually misses me! He's not glad I'm gone!_

She moved on to the other letter. As she unfolded the paper, another letter, this one actually printed and in English, fell out, along with a small pamphlet. She glanced at the English printed letter in confusion and put it aside, hoping the actual other message from her parents made more sense. This one was from her mother. _'Dear Elsa, this odd letter came here addressed to us, but it was clearly for you and Anna. The couple who delivered it was one of the many people that have moved here (a non-suspicious one, thank goodness). The letter explains everything, but we still had a lot of questions after reading it, so we talked to the couple. It turns out you two have caused quite a stir in the United States, and the producer of what is called a TV show thinks having you on it would increase ratings? I am still rather confused about it. You would have to be away for about a month or so, so I agree with your father that it's a terrible idea at the moment, but perhaps you could do it later, after everything is calm again. I don't even know if you'd_ want _to do this, to be honest; I sure wouldn't. There is one trusted man here that we could leave in charge, and we could come back and take care of Arendelle for you while you were gone, perhaps. But please don't do it right now. I love you, Elsa, and I miss you very much. Tell your sister the same. Love, Mama.'_

When Elsa read the printed English letter, she frowned and then just began laughing. These people wanted her and Anna-and "you may bring one friend or family member per person," it also said-on a TV show? A game show about living outside with basically nothing for a month? Elsa's first thought was that it was some kind of trap, but she sensed nothing odd from the letter. Usually she could tell such things; not perfectly, but perhaps 99.9 percent of the time. And her father specifically said that he thought it was dumb, but that it was definitely not a trap. She believed him. Maybe it would be fun, for all she knew. It specifically mentioned that she and Anna would not receive preferential treatment once the game started, 'so that it will be fair to the other contestants and you. We are very sorry.'. That did _not_ warrant an apology in Elsa's mind; she loved the idea of being in a situation where she was just like everyone else. The only thing was that once she read all the fine print and the like, she was quite sure she wouldn't last very long on the game. She didn't _dislike_ the outdoors, but she had grown up in a castle with nice things and Gerda making meals for her and everything. Elsa liked to think she wasn't a stereotypical rich person that couldn't-or wouldn't-take care of herself, but she didn't know much about living 'in the wilderness'. Anna would be far better.

Elsa wrote a coded reply to her father and a regular reply to her mother and just set the TV show invitation thing aside. She'd share it with Anna first, because she would reply differently depending on that. Then she moved on to her other letters.

* * *

Just before lunchtime, Elsa came and knocked on her sister's door. She'd been debating whether or not she needed to apologize for reacting to what Anna had said before. Confident Elsa thought she did not owe Anna any such thing; she hadn't done anything mean-she had just run off and hid in the stupid dungeon. But the sad, scared part of her insisted that she did too owe Anna an apology. She had, after all, ignored Anna for all that time, and she had gotten unreasonably distraught from simple words. That was dumb. That _was_ her fault. _You made Anna worry about you for no reason. You acted stupid._

 _I did not! I was upset. And I did not make an icy mess or take out my emotions on Anna. I left. And I calmed down on my own._

 _You were scared and acted like a crybaby for no reason. Do you really think you're worth enough to be allowed to get upset like that, Elsa? Because you're not. You're nothing but a-_

 _Shut up! It was not 'no reason'. It may not have been a good reason, but still. Shut up. I am not worthless. I help protect my country. And I got home all by myself, so there. I am a human girl, too, just like Anna!_

 _Oh really? Never would have guessed that. You're delusional. You felt jealous of your own sister for no reason!_ Poor Elsa kept fighting with herself all morning, unable to completely banish the accusatory and guilty thoughts. This time the broken part of her inside won, and she headed straight to Anna's room, ignoring the bit of her mind that reminded her it hadn't been her fault, really. She knocked lightly on the door and then clasped her hands behind her back nervously. The second Anna opened the door, Elsa blurted out, "I'm sorry I reacted like that. I shouldn't have-there was no reason for it. It was dumb. I just-"

And then Anna just interrupted her by hugging her close. _Elsa came over here to_ apologize?! _Why? I'm the one that owes_ her _an apology. Not the other way around._ After Gerda had come back and told her that Elsa was fine, that she was sleeping peacefully in her own room, before going back to sit with Elsa because she'd promised to stay; Anna had just tossed and turned until it was time to get up, unable to get back to sleep. Elsa had admitted something out loud that Anna knew she was scared and embarrassed about. _"That you might just take care of stupid, broken Elsa just because you think you're s-supposed t-to,"_ Anna could still hear her sister's quiet voice saying. While she'd assured Elsa that no, that wasn't true, she'd gone and followed up with admitting the most horrible thing she had ever thought about Elsa, thinking knowing the truth would help. _Me and my big mouth. That just hurt her again. It didn't help. Why would that help?!_ Now Elsa came and tried to apologize, when she most definitely did _not_ owe her any such thing. "Elsa, you do not owe me an apology," Anna choked out, still clutching her big sister tightly. "I owe you one!" Tears burned in her eyes, remembering Elsa sitting in the corner of that cell in a ball crying like that. Anna had hurt her. She had made her think she belonged in that horrid old cell.

Elsa winced; her bruised ribs were definitely not healed yet, of course, and Anna squeezing her hurt. But she said nothing about it and just rested her chin on Anna's shoulder. _Real-me doesn't know whether I owe you an apology or not, Anna. I don't know whether you owe me an apology, either._ "Anna…maybe we can just forget about it?" she offered hesitantly. "Because I don't know who knows who an apology, to be honest. I'm sorry that I don't know who needs to say sorry," Elsa added without the slightest bit of humor. She was quite serious, because she really didn't know.

Anna hugged her big sister tighter, and this time the older girl yelped in pain. "Oh, Elsa, I forgot!" Anna exclaimed, instantly ceasing squeezing Elsa so tightly. She scowled; Elsa was holding her sore ribs now, although she didn't look upset. Just a bit…confused. _She doesn't know whether she needed to apologize or not!_ Anna thought happily. That meant while whatever accusatory thoughts in Elsa's mind that said 'your fault! your fault!' had indeed won this time, Elsa hadn't immediately accepted that as fact. She was _thinking_. She knew that it wasn't _really_ her fault. She just wasn't confident and strong enough yet to push them away entirely. _Gerda said Elsa had already managed to calm down on her own by the time Gerda had found her, too. Yes, Elsa went and thought she was supposed to be in that nasty old cell, but she broke out of that train of thought_ by herself _. She's better now._ Anna smiled a bit at Elsa as she said, "Well, I definitely owe you an apology for squishing you when you're hurt. And…maybe-I don't know, but maybe-maybe I don't owe you an apology for _telling_ you what I said before, but I do owe you an apology for thinking it in the first place when I was little. I never gave you one."

Elsa's 'signature' lopsided smile spread slowly across her face, but then her expression scrunched up and she frowned. "Do…do I owe you an apology too?" she asked hesitantly, the way a little girl that didn't understand might. _Elsa, you sound like a baby,_ a gleefully accusatory thought informed her. _Shut up. That is a legitimate question, even if it's a stupid one._

"No, Elsa," Anna told her gently. "You owe _yourself_ one." She took Elsa by the hand and led her over to a mirror. "Tell 'real-Elsa' you're sorry for calling the part of her that still hurts 'stupid, broken Elsa' and making her feel guilty because she's really sensitive."

"I don't understand. If they are facts, then no one owes anyone an apology," Elsa said flatly. The 'other' Elsa in the mirror just stared back at her looking confused. "Those are facts."

Anna sighed. _Good grief, Elsa can be so stubborn!_ "Answer this. Let's just say, very babyishly, that you go and eat the last cookie Gerda has made, not knowing that it was mine, and I yell at you, 'That was my cookie!' Would I owe you an apology for that? It is a fact, after all."

"But I would know that it was your cookie, because Gerda still leaves cookies that are specifically for us in labeled jars," Elsa frustratingly pointed out.

Anna sighed again. Elsa could be maddeningly literal sometimes. She couldn't decide whether to hug Elsa or smack her. She did neither. "Elsa, it's just _supposing_. Not real, you stinker," she said firmly.

"Well…I suppose you shouldn't yell at me for it if I didn't know. But…I _would_ know it was your cookie, and then I would owe you an apology for eating it because that's mean. In which case it wouldn't be nice to yell at me, but you would have full reason to…"

This was obviously too abstract for Elsa, who had gotten in her head that this scenario was ridiculous and would never happen, and Anna gave up on it. Elsa may have liked abstract ideas about math and science and the like, but then she liked trying to prove them one way or the other. Anna couldn't help giggling; Elsa was very smart, but she couldn't grasp the simple thing Anna was trying to explain. Anna could tell Elsa was not trying to be difficult. She was just being…Elsa. "All right, Elsa, never mind! My point is that you can tell the facts and still be really horrible and mean. Maybe a bit of you feels broken inside. That's ok. You're _healing._ That's normal. But you shouldn't call yourself stupid for feeling that way. And does being really sensitive cause trouble sometimes? Well, sure, but it also means you're very caring and loving and you're good at helping others. Does that make more sense?"

Elsa thought for a moment before replying. _That…that actually does make sense. I'm sure I'm going to end up thinking like that again, but I think I get it. I actually understand! I'm no good at emotions and I actually…get it. For real!_ "Well…why couldn't you have just said that in the first place? Instead of the cookie nonsense?" she asked finally.

Anna just stared at her before cracking up laughing. "You…you stinker!"

* * *

"Elsa, I invited Ms. Diane to dinner tonight," Anna told her sister after lunch as the two of them headed back upstairs. "I kind of forgot to tell you this morning. We found one track-y bug thing last night-in the lining of her laptop thing's bag, of all things-and she disabled it, but I told her not to throw it away 'cause I thought you'd want to see it since you like mechanical things like that."

Elsa nodded. "I _would_ like to see it. In any event, we will not be worrying ourselves with that any longer." _I'm going to work on something by myself in that used-to-be dungeon cell. Nobody will look there. I'll work on trying to make my leg better so I can surprise Gerda, and I'm building_ my own _computer spying type thing. A magic-based one, so no one can crack into it except me._ She grinned as she remembered the TV show thing. "I have something to show you, too. I'll share it with you now," Elsa added, tugging Anna into her room. She handed the pamphlet and letter to Anna and just crossed her arms, waiting expectantly for Anna's reaction. "It came from Mama and Papa. They think it's safe, too."

When a few minutes passed and Anna didn't seem excited or anything, Elsa's eager expression faded. She had been _positive_ Anna would get all excited and want to go do the show thing immediately and then she'd explain that they would have to do it later once everything calmed down, if the TV people still wanted them. "Anna, what's wrong? I thought it would make you really excited. You love outdoor things," Elsa pointed out. "Of course we would have to wait until everything is straightened out politically and the like, but after that, I figured it would be something fun to do. A challenge. If we completely failed and got voted off quickly, we wouldn't look like idiots, because no one would expect us to do well on the show anyway. And I kind of like the idea of-"

"Elsa, I _don't_ want to do this, and I shan't have you doing it either. So there," Anna interrupted, frowning. "I'm…scared of snakes. Yeah. That's all. There will be loads of snakes outside." She forced a smile, handed the papers back to Elsa, and quickly started to leave the room. If she stayed much longer, Elsa would figure out she was mostly fibbing, if she hadn't already.

Sure enough, Elsa's puzzled but very firm voice immediately sounded behind her. "Anna Grieg, you come back here! You're lying for some reason!" Elsa had her good hand on her hip and she was staring at Anna indignantly. "Did you think I couldn't tell? You know me better than that."

Anna sighed and trudged back over to her sister. "Ok, I admit it. It's not because of stupid snakes," she admitted, but didn't say anything else.

Elsa merely continued staring at her, which was kind of unnerving.

"You can't go on a survivor game show. You're a _queen_. And I don't want to do it without you?" Anna offered, still refusing to give Elsa the real reason. Maybe Elsa would drop the subject.

But Elsa just tilted her head to one side and crossed her arms again.

Anna shifted her weight from one foot to the other nervously, not wanting to make Elsa upset again since she seemed a hundred percent fine at the moment. "We don't know _anything_ about surviving in some wild tropical place with no supplies," she said finally.

"So we'll learn! Practice building fires and read up on what sort of plants are safe to eat and that sort of thing. Ask Kristoff, Anna. He probably knows how to build fires without matches or flint and cook fish and things like that," Elsa countered. "Anna, really, you are being silly. It sounds like a fun challenge to me. The other contestants would probably vote us off quickly anyway-me first and then you, since you're better at navigating social things and the like than I am. If we hate it, we hate it. No big deal. Even _Mama and Papa_ say it's safe."

"I don't want y- _us_ to do it," Anna said firmly. She searched Elsa's face, trying to figure out why Elsa seemed so excited about the idea. It didn't sound like something her usually proper-or at least _appearing_ to be-big sister would be interested in to her.

Elsa frowned, catching Anna's quick substitution of 'us' for 'you'. "Why don't you want me doing it?" she asked quietly. She saw Anna's eyes fall on her braced leg for a split second and instantly scowled. "My _leg_?! Is that all?! Anna, that isn't _fair_! We could actually do something where we're just ordinary people, same as everyone else. I know that doesn't really matter to you, but it does to me. I like the idea of getting to be in a situation where I'm not special or the queen or anything. Just Elsa. And…and you don't want us to even try because of a stupid reason like that?" Elsa's blue eyes looked hurt, but she was clearly at least a little bit angry. "Anna, the TV people wouldn't have specifically invited us if they didn't want us."

"Elsa, they also might not know you're…hurt," Anna pointed out hesitantly. "It says right in the papers that you wouldn't be allowed to use your magic to just help yourself because it wouldn't be fair to everyone else. It would have to help either everyone on your team or at least one other person. Which is understandable, but…"

"But _what_?"

Anna sighed, knowing no matter what she said now, Elsa would just react the same way. She might as well just tell her the truth. "Without using your magic, I don't think this sounds fair to _you_. At all. Running and climbing things during challenges without your magic? What if we had to go hiking or something? Elsa, you _know_ you can't do those things. And…and I don't want you getting hurt somehow."

"I'll practice," Elsa replied stubbornly. "I know I'm not exactly as athletic as you are, but that doesn't have anything to do with my leg."

"No, Elsa, it does, whether you like it or not. _You_ have told me lots of times I try to get you to do things you can't do. Well, either that or fuss over you. Now you're doing the first one to yourself," Anna told her, hoping very much that Elsa wouldn't get upset. Anna dearly wanted to backtrack when she saw Elsa's eyes filling with tears, but she didn't. She just reached for Elsa and gave her a hug instead. "Maybe Ms. Diane knows more about this. She could've watched the show on TV herself before she moved here."

"Let me bring it up, though. I still don't a hundred percent trust her-my instincts say it's okay to do so, but still." Elsa pulled away from her little sister and just stared her right in the face, her blue eyes wet with tears but determined. "And _you_ are going to help me learn how to do things like climbing trees and the like without using my magic. And make me stronger so you don't beat me at arm wrestling and the like! I give you permission to try to get me to do things I probably can't do. Just…if I get frustrated, we'll have to stop and come back to it later. Is that all right?"

Anna gave Elsa a tentative grin and nodded. "All right. Maybe we'll make your bad leg stronger in the process," she suggested hopefully. "D'you want to start now?"

"Just for a little while-an hour maybe? I still have a lot of letters to reply to," Elsa answered.

* * *

First Anna helped Elsa do the exercises and stretches for her leg that Gerda usually did with her. Anna frowned as she helped her sister; Elsa's cheeks looked slightly pink, like she might be embarrassed, and she wouldn't say anything other than what to do next when Anna asked her. "It's ok, Elsa, really. I don't mind helping you. Honestly, I'm happy you're letting me. And you're doing better than before, too," Anna said reassuringly. "Ok, now you try by yourself." She watched as Elsa tried to straighten her weak leg on her own.

Elsa was just sitting on the edge of her bed with her legs dangling over the side; Anna sat on the carpet so she could help Elsa with her leg. "I can't," she mumbled almost inaudibly. She tried this every single time Gerda did the dumb therapy exercises with her, and it never worked. Elsa concentrated hard anyways and managed to move it a little bit, although it wouldn't straighten like she wanted it to; it just flopped back down limply. She bit her lip in frustration. _Elsa, you knew it was going to do that. It never does what you want it to._

"Elsa, quit biting your lip. You're gonna make that cut start bleeding again-you know it's not healed yet," Anna scolded. She decided not to say anything positive or negative about Elsa's partly successful attempt to make her leg do what she wanted it to; she just helped Elsa stand up and held her hands tightly, being careful with her left hand because of her sprained wrist. "'Kay, I got an idea. You said it collapses under you when you try to walk on it without your brace, so I had a different idea. Can you try to shift just a bit of weight on it and just stop when you feel it start collapsing under you?" she suggested.

"I…I don't know," Elsa admitted, her eyes flitting from her leg to Anna and back again nervously. _You're fine, Elsa. It's safe. Anna's right here and she's not mad at you or anything._

"I won't let you fall, Elsa. I promise," Anna said softly. She watched as Elsa evidently tried to do what Anna had told her to do but then quickly plopped back down on the bed, clearly frightened. "What's wrong, exactly?"

Elsa shook her head. "I don't know. I…I just felt it give out under me and I…got scared. I'm sorry. Let's try again." Elsa closed her eyes and gripped Anna's hands tightly as she tried again. This time both girls ended up in a heap on the floor…in a pile of snow. But Elsa didn't care; she had _felt_ herself put a tiny bit of weight on her bad leg before losing her balance and falling…and accidentally yanking Anna along with her. "I did it, Anna! Just a tiny bit, but I did do it!" she exclaimed happily.

Anna grinned as she brushed snow out of her eyes. "How much, do you think?"

"I don't know, probably a pound or two, I suppose. Barely any. But still more than none," Elsa replied. Her blue eyes twinkled as she added, "One and a half percent there-only ninety-eight-and-a-half percent to go." Elsa honestly wasn't sure how much she weighed exactly, but it was probably about a hundred pounds, more or less.

"Stinker," Anna informed her matter-of-factly. She didn't think what Elsa had done was that great-she had _fallen,_ for goodness sakes!-but if it was enough to make Elsa happy, Anna was not going to take that away from her. Anna tried to remind herself that Elsa was lucky she could walk at all, even though she had to wear that brace, but it still made Anna upset. She frowned at her sister's left foot, all limp and flopped to one side again now that Elsa wasn't concentrating hard on it. That was not fair. She wanted Elsa to be all better _now_. _Wait. I did not want to say those things aloud! I prob'ly just made Elsa upset again…_

Elsa's happy expression disappeared as she listened to Anna's words, knowing Anna probably didn't mean to be talking out loud. "Anna, you know it's not _ever_ going to be 'all better'. Grand Pabbie told us that," she said quietly. "And from what I've read in that magic book, I think I'll be able to walk without my brace eventually, but I'm still going to have a limp. That's just the way it is. Honestly I have a hard time believing just that." She reached for her brace and strapped it back on her leg before standing up and holding a hand out to Anna. "I'm _fine,_ Anna, I can function without two good legs. I'm not helpless, even without using my magic. Gerda showed me that. I just get…scared sometimes, that's all."

"You used your magic just now to stand up," Anna pointed out. "You told me you didn't know how to stand up from sitting on the floor without using your magic, too."

"Then I'll figure out how," Elsa retorted instantly, plopping herself back down on the floor. " _Don't_ help me, please." She thought for a moment before simply pulling herself to her feet with the edge of her desk, which hurt her wrist and was harder and took longer than using her magic to help, but would work fine once her wrist had healed. She looked at Anna triumphantly. "See, I said I could do it. So there."

"And what if there was nothing to hold on to?" Anna asked gently, her blue-green eyes sad and slightly worried as Elsa sat back down on the floor and tried again. Watching Elsa struggling to stand up and failing made Anna want to cry. Why did her sweet big sister have to be permanently hurt in the first place? It wasn't fair. And it wasn't like she had been born that way-if that was the case, Anna knew she wouldn't think much about it at all. Anna quickly scooped Elsa up and set her back on her feet when she finally gave up and held out her hand for help.

"I'm sorry, Anna, I tried," Elsa mumbled into her sister's shoulder. _I know there has to be a way to do that, because there are lots of other people in the world that have hurt legs and no magic to help them. So there has to be a way. I just can't think of how…_ "May we please just do something else? Let's go outside for the other twenty minutes. Then I have to go back to work until dinner."

* * *

Soon the girls were out in the gardens. Elsa thought it was far too hot, so she made a bubble of cool air around herself and another for Anna. Anna grinned when she thought of a new idea. "How's this? We go from here under the tree to the pool, swim across the pool, over that half fallen tree that needs to get removed, and back to this tree. Whole course twice. First time no magic, second time as much magic as you like-you just can't fly. 'Kay?" Anna was hoping that doing two rounds in one go like that would make it easier for Elsa to keep up, because she would take forever without her magic and finish almost instantly with her magic.

Elsa glanced down at her braced leg for a moment, but she nodded. She hated losing to her little sister, but Anna probably wouldn't tease her for it. Not this time, which was both relieving and kind of irritating, because little sisters were _supposed_ to do that. Well, maybe Anna would anyways. That would actually be nice. "Okay. You're on. And _don't_ go easy on me. If I fall, don't help, either. I'll tell you if more than my pride is hurt," she deadpanned. "Wait, do I have to get rid of our personal cool air bubbles?"

Anna couldn't decide whether to scowl or laugh at that, but she agreed. Maybe Elsa would see that doing challenge things sans her magic was a terrible idea if she lost by a ton, which Anna was sure she would. "And yes, you have to get rid of the air bubbles, but just for the first round."

A second later, Anna took off at a run like she was supposed to, and Elsa headed toward the pool as fast as she could. She already felt far too hot- _why_ was it ninety degrees when it wasn't even officially summer yet?!-and she felt herself quickly growing sweaty. By the time she reached the pool, Anna was already at the halfway point of the first round, and she redoubled her efforts.

When Elsa was finally done with the first round, she saw that Anna was already halfway back from the second one. Instantly she remade her ice bubble and then sent herself sliding forward at breakneck speed on a path of ice. She went skidding right _over_ the pool, crashed into a pile of snow at the turnaround mark, and streaked back. She crossed the finish line far before Anna did, and Elsa grinned at her little sister's incredulous look. "You _said_ I could use as much magic as I wanted the second time," she pointed out happily. "I beat you, Anna!" Elsa crowed in delight. "I have a bad leg, and I beat you anyways!"

Anna made a slightly annoyed 'hmph' at her; she hated losing as much as Elsa did. But she just reached for Elsa and hugged her close. _Well, if Elsa was participating in a team thing and she did that, then that would be technically helping the whole team because she'd be helping them win. Same with the air bubbles-if she gave one to every person on her team, that's helping everyone. I don't care; it doesn't matter. If this stupid thing is something Elsa wants to do eventually, then I'm not going to say we can't. It's just…even if Elsa can handle herself fine-which I think she can-that's not going to keep other people from being mean to her. What if they tease her or something?_ "Now I've only got one worry…I just don't want other people being mean to you, that's all."

Elsa shrugged and gave Anna a lopsided smile. "Well, it won't be someone making you be mean to me, so I might get temporarily upset, but I know I'd be fine," she replied. "Anna, I _really_ want to do this, and I think I can. I…I kind of want to prove to myself that I can," she said softly. "That there's a n-normal girl that can take care of herself inside, not just the…the faux-emotionless Snow Queen. Or a b-broken little girl." Elsa's gaze fell as she added, "When I saw that we wouldn't get special treatment, I…I just felt like I _had_ to at least try. I know it's stupid and ridiculous, but-"

"Elsa, stop," Anna interrupted. "You don't have to explain. I think I get it. So let's just get everything straightened out politically, and then we can go do this ridiculous thing, I guess. 'Kay?" She gave Elsa's hand a comforting squeeze as she added, "I know you don't like 'being Elsa' a lot of the time, and we're going to change that."

 **A/N: Yeah, Elsa thinks it's a wonderful idea to go on a game show. Elsa, you are silly. :) (By the way, I have NO idea where that idea came from...it's just been stuck in my head for awhile and...yeah. If you absolutely hate that idea, that's fine-that won't happen in this story; I'm going to make it a separate thing (ie., the next story in the ongoing Frozen saga timeline...:P) Also, Olivia O'Neil suggested I write the trolls' magic book, which is another idea I like very much. Thanks, Olivia! :) I will finish 'Child of Ska∂i' or this story and then move on to the magic book.**

 **I also have a one-shot half done with fourteen-year-old Elsa being fascinated with the brand-new typewriter her father let her have because he didn't like it. (Elsa just wants to take it apart to see how it works.:))**

 **Next chapter coming soon!**


	27. Chapter 27

**A/N: Thanks to everyone who's followed/favorited and/or is reading but not reviewing:)**

 **Elsa Tomago-I PMed you, so I won't make you reread the same thing here:)**

 **FluffyKitten-Lol, yes, Elsa can be pretty easygoing sometimes. I'm sure her parents wouldn't be happy with her if they knew, but they aren't there, so...who cares?:) Yes, Kiara is Hans's little sister, so I suppose yes that makes her the 14th Southern Isles kid. At the moment, Hans is working off his sentence in Arendelle, but that will be up soon. Okay...let me try to explain myself here...Hans is SORT OF reformed, I suppose. He knows what he did was wrong, but he hasn't apologized for it, either. He won't try to take over Arendelle again, but he wouldn't hesitate to charm his way into a job after he leaves Arendelle, either. :P Okay, yes, it is a Survivor-esque show, but they may not actually do it. (Actually they probably won't.:)) However, look for a funny, eventful camping trip soon.:P Well, Elsa wasn't very good with the obstacle course _at all_ when she wasn't using her magic but once she did...look out! :) **

**Guest-Thank you _ever_ so much for calling me pig-headed. *sarcasm alert* :P Okay, that being said, a new chapter of Dear Elsa should be up tomorrow.:) Sorry for the wait:)**

 **Elsa and Ingrid-I am not working on 'No Escape' at the moment, although I intend to finish it eventually. If you just want more information about Ingrid though, there will be a bit about her in this story actually (ie., Elsa reading Ingrid's old ice pane diary thing), and it's important to resolving the main issue in this story, too.:) As far as Dear Elsa is concerned, there should be a new chapter up tomorrow.**

 **orang biasa-That's okay. Thank you for being honest. Nope, you're right. The U.S./Arendelle tension is the main plot...and a bit of a mystery at this point as Elsa hasn't managed to put all the pieces together yet and neither has anyone else.:) (That will change within the next two chapters.) The rest is subplots. I will say that finding Ingrid's ice pane diary things in the attic is actually important.:P I'll leave it a sort of secret as to why, although you and all the other readers can probably figure it out. Kiara is just visiting Arendelle-she's not staying. She is 11, almost 12 now. Elsa's parents will not be visiting Arendelle again. No worries, although I hope you decide to keep reading, lol.:) Thanks for the honest feedback.**

 **IndyGirl89-Elsa just wanted info about modern technology and stuff, and no, as you probably found out already, it was NOT safe. :P I thought Nikoleta was a good friend for Elsa, too.:) Well...Elsa isn't exactly playing matchmaker since she thinks that's silly, but yes, I suppose you could say she's trying to get her new friend Nikoleta to make friends with someone else.:)**

 **On to the story! (Sorry for the length of this chapter...it's just where I thought it made sense to do a chapter break.:)**

"Queen Elsa, I wouldn't swear that that's the only tracking device like that in my belongings, but your sister and Mr. Bjorgman helped me go through everything very thoroughly last night," Ms. Diane said at dinner as she handed the disabled tracking 'bug' to a very curious Elsa. "I did not mean to bring such a thing here-I'm sorry, I should have checked better before I left."

Elsa raised one eyebrow, having already decided to act slightly suspicious around Ms. Diane at first this evening. That would be confusing and unnerving if Ms. Diane really did want to betray her, and the lady's previous job meant that she would understand Elsa's reaction if she didn't mean anything. "How do I know you are not pretending not to know about this so I will let down my guard?" Elsa asked flatly. "Do you know anything about Kai and I being targeted for a car accident in the United States? After all, you helped us find that car." Elsa kept her eyes focused on the American lady, searching for anything remotely suspicious. She found nothing except for clear nervousness-perhaps even fear. _All right, Elsa, don't scare your country's newcomers. Time to backtrack._ "I just need to be sure you are not part of some conspiracy. That is all. I met your boss, Oscar," she said off-handedly, purposely dropping the name.

Ms. Diane jumped in her seat at Elsa's nonchalant manner. _She seems more confident than she did the first time I saw her._ "Queen Elsa, if you'll pardon my saying so without concrete evidence, that man is _not_ a loyal American. He's a…a…I don't know how to put it."

"Bad man?" Anikka offered, waving her fork around like a sword. Elsa shook her head lightly in disapproval, and little Anikka quickly sat up straight and put her fork back on her plate where it belonged. "Sorry, Elsa."

"To say the least, he is exactly that, Queen Elsa. I never could quite put my finger on it, but there is something off about him. Up to something horrible," Ms. Diane said. "A conspirator or something, I don't know. Is…is he the one that did that?" she asked hesitantly, gesturing at Elsa's bandaged temple and her injured wrist.

Elsa laughed at that, but she looked thoughtful. Could her initial thoughts (that she'd written off as paranoid) that Oscar had infiltrated a government agency and was some crazy weird terrorist person himself really be correct? "Certainly not! Not unless he caused the car accident, which I know he did not because he didn't immediately know I was…me. He did try to shoot me at point-blank range, however," she replied. When Ms. Diane just stared at her incredulously, Elsa just smiled, her blue eyes twinkling. "I have my secrets," she said cryptically. She made a small paper-thin sheet of ice and handed it to Ms. Diane. "Try to snap it in two."

After several failed attempts, the American lady stared at the unmelting unbreakable ice in her hand, not quite sure what to say. "The…The…your ice won't break like any other ice would. It…it can stop a _bullet at point-blank range_?!"

Elsa just waved her hand, and the ice disappeared. "Is there another explanation that makes better sense?" she quipped. She had no intentions of confirming anything at all. Better if she just looked mysteriously powerful. Changing the subject, she said, "On another note, my sister and I are curious about a particular game show. We were wondering if you had watched it yourself before you moved here."

* * *

After dinner, Ms. Diane went home, and Anna waited until Nikoleta had taken Eliot and Anikka back upstairs before whispering in Elsa's ear, "Can I go out to the stables with Kristoff and help him brush Sven and just talk for awhile?"

Elsa frowned, but she nodded. _I'm lucky Anna's even asking me; she could have done who knows what while I was gone and I wouldn't even know._ "But don't do _anything_ else, or you will find your bed all full of snow or something," she said firmly.

Anna stuck out her tongue, but she quickly agreed and ran out to the stables with Kristoff right behind her. Soon she and Kristoff were brushing Sven, who kept eyeing Olaf's carrot nose while Olaf waddled back and forth. "Kristoff, Elsa wants to go on this crazy surviving-in-the-wilderness TV show thing," Anna said presently. "Like camping and fishing and special challenges like running and climbing things and puzzles and stuff. If you win, you get loads of money. I'd donate it to Elsa's project to help the children and stuff."

"So I heard at dinner. Well, I still don't quite understand what a TV show is, but what's wrong with that? Sounds useful to me, although I can't see Q-Elsa doing all that really. She's kind of…not really outdoorsy, I don't think," Kristoff replied. "Well, that's not her fault, seeing as your parents kept her inside all the time when she was little, but still. You sure she wasn't kidding?" _Of course she wasn't kidding. I heard her talking during dinner…_

"Nope. She's really excited about the idea. I just…I don't know. I get why she wants to and all and I already said I'd do it with her, but…" Anna's voice trailed off.

Kristoff just stared at her. "I don't get what the problem is. I'd think you'd _want_ to do something like that with her. I'd do it. I'm used to living outdoors with little. I'll take you two on a camping trip sometime if you want. Show you how to start a fire without matches and things like that." He frowned at Anna's nonexistent reaction. She seemed awfully worried for her usual carefree happy-go-lucky self. "Anna. Seriously, what is wrong?"

"I don't want Elsa doing something like that," Anna said flatly, crossing her arms. (Sven looked at her expectantly because she wasn't brushing him anymore.)

"Why not?"

"She's hurt-she can't even walk properly…"

"So what? Elsa's a big girl. I think she can go do outdoor things if someone showed her how," Kristoff replied in a confident voice. "Really, Anna, that's ridiculous."

"But the other contestant people might not be nice to her," Anna muttered. "Kristoff, you don't get it. She would be just like everyone else, just another contestant. That's the very reason why she _wants_ to do it, but that means she wouldn't have her position of authority to protect her, either. I…I just don't want some nasty person picking on her or something and…a-and hurting her again. Or Elsa getting upset with herself 'cause she can't do something."

Kristoff awkwardly hugged Anna close, debated on kissing her, and then decided that was not the right reaction at the moment. He had a fairly good idea of why Elsa would want to do something that seemed completely unlike her, and he completely understood Anna's reaction. Anna just didn't want to risk hypersensitive Elsa being hurt if she could do something to prevent even a slight risk of it. "Elsa is not a baby. She can decide things for herself, Anna. Just because she freaks out sometimes and cries and things doesn't mean you have to be her guardian all the time. It sounds to me like she just wants to be…normal. Whatever this crazy TV show thing is, she thinks it will let her do that. Whether that's true or not I don't know, but I think you thinking she can't do it will hurt her worse than some random stranger picking on her ever could. I saw Q-Elsa at dinner this evening. She was _not_ frightened or nervous. Looked pretty confident actually."

Anna hesitated. "The TV people said we could invite two others. Would you come? Maybe you could protect Elsa. You look kind of imposing when you want to be."

"Yes, but I really think Elsa doesn't need protecting in this case. Anna, she _is_ healing inside, whether you can see it or not. She's not that terrified girl from last summer or even from just a few _weeks_ ago. She still needs you there for her, but not the same way, I don't think." Kristoff thought for a moment, still baffled by Elsa's either all-over-the-place or completely-stifled emotions somewhat, even though he understood why she was like that. "I think maybe she needs her annoying little sister back again. You're kind of thinking of her like she's a kicked puppy. And said puppy has sort of gotten over being kicked and mostly just needs to be treated like any other properly treated puppy would."

Anna thought of little pre-accident eight-year-old Elsa, who still needed lots of TLC, but was mostly perfectly fine, mischievous and self-confident and everything. "You mean…I should treat Elsa like she's completely ok inside? Tease her and want to borrow her stuff and things like that?"

"I did _not_ say be a pest, no," Kristoff said quickly, thinking that he did _not_ want to deal with a grumpy Elsa's reaction if she found out he had told Anna it was a good idea to tease her and get in her things. That girl might freeze his sled-that-was-also-a-wagon in place somewhere and then play innocent and think it was awfully funny or something. "I just mean Elsa's going to realize sometime soon-if she hasn't already-that you don't think she's ok like she is, even if you act like you do and tell her so. She _really_ values your opinion, and if she believes that you think she can't do things by herself because she's hurt or that she can't handle herself on her own socially, then she'll probably believe it herself sooner or later. I don't think you should...hmm, I don't know what to call it...coddle her when she _does_ freak out either. Just sit with her and give her a hug or something, not talk to her. Elsa needs to learn to calm down and make herself feel better on her own without help."

Anna scowled. "But Elsa really can't do some things with her leg like it is," she pointed out. "And I don't want her getting hurt or upset or something!" _And...Kristoff has a point. Fussing over her isn't helping Elsa learn to calm down on her own at all..._

"Anna, she already knows that. You cannot tell me you think your sister doesn't know she can't run, for example. And I'm sure she knows better than anyone her limits to socializing. Go find her and tell her she has two companions for her TV show thing. I bet your two's cousin Rapunzel would do it too, so tell her three, then." Kristoff went back to brushing Sven, who was still waiting patiently, although he looked slightly bothered by having to wait while Anna and Kristoff were talking. "And assuming this ridiculous politics thing doesn't blow up in everyone's face, I can take you two camping out in the woods if you want this weekend, and we can try to follow the guidelines your event thing would have."

"Okay." Anna felt better about the whole thing now, but she sort of hoped Elsa wouldn't like it and decide she didn't want to do it anymore.

* * *

Late that night, Elsa slipped down into the dungeons unnoticed. "Under no circumstances are you to tell anyone I have been here," she told the guard in the hallway. She took a deep breath before slipping into that old cell, now beautifully redecorated with ice. Setting her candle down on the window ledge and her sack of books on the snowy 'bed', she quickly began making small cans of ice and carefully filling them with water. When she had made ten, she set them aside in a corner in a neat stack. This was going to be an ongoing project for her; it had crossed her mind that she wouldn't live forever, and after she died, Arendelle wouldn't have her magic to protect it anymore. She would not let her little country be taken over after she was gone if she could do anything to help it. If she came down here and made ten water-cans as often as she could, Anna and her child after her, and her child after that, and so on, should have plenty of emergency magic, enough to last for a long, long time. Ingrid's magic ice had remained intact in the attic; Elsa's magic would as well. If each 'dose' lasted just under a week and each can held five 'doses', well…then eventually Arendelle could have a superpowered army if need be. Elsa knew the temporary water powers her magic water would give others wasn't remotely as strong as her own magic, but it was better than nothing.

 _I also need to figure out how to make bulletproof vests somehow. Ones that won't freeze others, too. And build my magic-based computer spying system._ All thoughts of her original reason for wanting to come down here floated right out of Elsa's head. Her leg annoyed her sometimes, and she still wanted to surprise Gerda very much, but that was not important compared to the other things she wanted to do. "I should start with trying to make acceptable functional armor for myself, and then modify it so it would work for anyone," she said to herself. After completely sealing the door shut so no one could walk in on her, she quickly took off her dress and created a copy of the flimsy thing she liked going swimming in instead. She would experiment making ice armor over that; that would be easier than trying to do it over a dress. _And I don't want to risk messing up my favorite dress, either._

The magic book from the trolls had information about making armor from one's magical powers, but the corresponding section in the chapter about ice magic wasn't really that helpful. Elsa made a face when she read that 'the stronger the armor is, the less comfortable it will be'. _I already guessed this._ There was another bit that said an ice master could meld his or her body with the ice armor and it would be perfectly flexible and comfortable. This could also be used to literally turn to ice, which Elsa found a little creepy, especially when she read that when you literally turned to ice, you were _not_ made of impenetrable ice and could shatter like regular ice might. It was more of a camouflage maneuver. But Elsa didn't know how to do this anyway and was more than a little afraid to try.

Elsa decided to just try making something herself, without the help of the book. She wasn't an ice master anyway, not yet, so she probably _couldn't_ do that even if she tried. Maybe she should just make a thinner, lighter ice version of those bulky suits of armor Anna sometimes ran into and knocked over. Soon she was testing her new design, pacing back and forth and bending sideways and backwards, testing the flexibility of it. A few of the joint seams in the ice-armor were pinching her skin, and she carefully altered them a bit, smoothing them out. _If someone shot me right this second, I would be perfectly fine, most likely,_ Elsa thought with satisfaction. She was bulletproof all over except for her face, neck, and hands. She'd tried to make a helmet, but it altered her vision too much, even with see-through ice. That was _not_ something she needed should she have to fight.

It crossed her mind that she no longer felt traumatized or scared by being down here. Confident Elsa had taken over with her ice; terrified Elsa that had been trapped down here was gone. Maybe it was just because she had turned the ugly, dirty old cell into a small sparkling ice haven, but still. She smiled as she carefully removed each piece of her ice-armor and left all of it in the opposite corner from the water-cans. She would improve her design as much as she could, and then practice making and unmaking it quickly.

After that, Elsa lay down on the snowy 'bed' and read about computers for awhile before going back upstairs.

* * *

Kiara showed up at the castle the next morning with a young woman and her husband at her side. "I should like to see Queen Elsa, if you please," she told the guard at the gate. "I am Princess Kiara." This time she would not be a poor street girl on her own. This time she had money, and she had purposely dressed in her nicest dress. The rest of her things were tightly packed in a single suitcase.

The guard raised one eyebrow. He remembered his queen having a friend named Kiara, and that girl looked like this one, but he hadn't known she was a princess. Princess from where? Probably the Southern Isles, he guessed; she had green eyes identical to Hans's. But the other two people with her were not ones he even remotely recognized. And…what were they wearing? Still…he knew Elsa welcomed guests. So he let them in. "Well, _Princess_ Kiara, welcome back to Arendelle."

Kiara nodded her thanks and marched into the castle in search of Elsa. She needed to see her friend again. _I kind of abandoned Snow Queen Elsa after she'd been really nice to me. I should have just stayed here._ She sighed, thinking that she had made another stupid decision besides that: getting rid of her magic. Without it, she wasn't as comfortable on her own. Those electricity powers had given her a far superior way to defend herself than an ordinary almost-twelve-year-old could. But no, she had had to impulsively get rid of them after seeing what they had done to Elsa. She remembered Elsa telling her that injuring her (Elsa) wasn't a good reason to get rid of her (Kiara's) powers. Elsa had _warned_ her, although she'd treated Kiara as grown-up enough to make her own decision. _You shouldn't've done that, Elsa._ But no, she had seen her best friend paralyzed, presumably permanently unable to walk because of something she had done; and then immediately wanted to get rid of all ties to it. _I sort of did that out of guilt. That was kind of…selfish._ "Come on in. Snow Queen Elsa won't mind," Kiara told her companions.

"Why do you call her a Snow Queen?" the young man asked.

Kiara just stared, not understanding why she needed to explain this. "Didn't you guys watch the TV and stuff before you decided to leave the United States? She has ice powers. She can make snow and stuff, like for real, not just in a story. It's awesome and she'll show you if you ask, I'm sure," she said, shrugging in confusion.

The young man stopped in his tracks. "If that's true, that's black magic. Sorcery!" he exclaimed half under his breath.

"It is not!" Kiara protested. "If you ask _really really_ nicely, you can ask Elsa to explain herself, but here's a quick explanation: she was born with the ability to control ice and snow. Babies can't practice witchcraft, obviously. And…and I'm not entirely sure how to explain this, but to me and Snow Queen Elsa and a lot of other people, there is a _big_ difference between 'sorcery' or 'black magic' and magical superpowers. They're just extra abilities, not…not consorting with nasty evil things. No weird creepy supernatural icky stuff. I mean, you could call it supernatural in the sense that it's really rare and different to what most people call 'normal', but it's not summoning spirits or casting spells or something. Does that at least sort of make sense?"

Kiara waited for a minute with no reply before continuing, "Snow Queen Elsa is a Christian, you guys. How could she be a Christian if she practiced some evil black magic thing?" Kiara herself wasn't sure what she believed. She did not like the annoying, prideful attitude a lot of 'religious' people gave off. Elsa and Anna were two of the very few that didn't bug her. And her own family claimed to be Christian, and they were creeps to her most of the time, so obviously religion did not make people nicer. So Kiara had come to the conclusion, at least for now, that she couldn't care less what other people believed, but she wanted to sort out her own opinions on such things by herself.

The couple both looked wary still, but the young woman laid her hand on her husband's arm and just said, "Ahmed, this little girl has been nothing but nice to us. She warned us it would be different here. It's our own fault we didn't understand what she meant." She turned to Kiara and asked, "Are you sure this Snow Queen Elsa won't mind us here, considering she's a Christian?"

Kiara grinned and nodded, although she hated being referred to as a little girl. "Yep. She might have absolute authority, but she would never, never send you away because you believe or dress differently than she does. Promise."

* * *

A few minutes later, Elsa was in the parlor downstairs with Kiara and the young couple. After hearing from Kai what exactly was going on, she had quickly decided to come here instead of the Great Hall, not wanting to unnerve the guests Kiara had brought with her. "I understand you're a bit uncomfortable with the idea of me having ice powers?" she asked. Knowing that her visitors didn't like magic worried her and it did hurt, but she was determined to push that aside. She could already see that these people didn't hate her. They were just uncomfortable and nervous. When her guests nodded, Elsa just said, "Well, I should like to hear your names and just a bit on why you're here if you don't…approve of me. Then I will do my best to explain myself." _Elsa, you can do this. Make these people feel at home in your country. Just stay calm and friendly and be yourself, but stay on guard 'til you know these people better. That young woman isn't much older than you are, you know._ "You may sit down, you know," she added, gesturing at the chairs across from her as she slightly awkwardly sat down herself, suddenly very glad she was wearing her cobalt blue ice-dress with the flutter sleeves rather than her original ice-dress. This dress didn't expose her braced leg when she sat down, and she hated when people stared at her for it.

Ahmed relaxed a little more. This girl was younger than he and his wife Salma were. She didn't look threatening. She looked like a slightly shy but friendly girl that must have been in some kind of accident recently. _She wouldn't offer to explain herself if she were doing something evil. She'd want to hide it or something similar._ Elsa's friendly smile encouraged him to explain. "My name is Ahmed, and this is my wife Salma. There is a lot of prejudice in the States toward people like us because of what's going on, and I didn't want us to stay there any longer. I have to protect Salma. Your friend Kiara told us we would be safe here."

"People like you?" Elsa asked curiously. "And I believe I know what you mean by 'what's going on'. I just do not understand what it has to do with 'people like you'." _Elsa, snap to it! You know exactly what he means, you idiot! Remember that religion book you read once? Your guests are Muslim. You just took forever to realize it because there are none in your country. That's why Salma is wearing that headscarf and those pretty but too-hot-for-this-weather clothes._ "I am very sorry for the idiotic question, I understand. But why would I care what you believe? And what would 'what's going on' have to do with it?"

Salma spoke up in a sad tone. "Queen Elsa, a few horrible people-a fanatical group, if you will-make the ninety-five percent of us that are fine look bad. Many of us dress different, as I do, and that makes us a target," she said quietly.

Elsa stood up and scowled, and the room's temperature abruptly dropped ten degrees. "But that's…that's not fair! _I_ dress differently, too-not for belief reasons, because I like to! That's…that's dumb, and ridiculous, and…and…I don't know what else!"

Both Salma's and Ahmed's eyes grew big when they felt Elsa's subconscious altering of the temperature in the room. And yet… _Elsa had not done anything_. She had just suddenly gotten upset. Those weird 'powers' of hers must react to the way she felt, just like in the movie. Salma smiled as she watched Elsa pace back and forth across the room in front of them. She reminded Salma of herself when she grew mad or upset, because she did the same thing, except…Salma didn't limp like Elsa did. She had already thought there might be something wrong with Elsa's left leg from the way she'd sat down; now she was sure. Elsa very clearly favored her left leg, and she dragged it a bit behind as she walked. _She's just a human girl,_ she thought firmly. _I don't know what weird abilities she has, but she's just a normal girl, and she's not doing anything bad. I know she's not._

"Excuse me," Elsa said presently, knowing ranting about unfair discrimination things in a place she had no control over was not the least bit helpful. "If I can assist you in some way, please feel free to ask. And as you have explained yourselves to me, is there anything you would like me to explain?"

"Just…where did these magic powers you have come from, Queen Elsa?" Ahmed asked. "How do they work?"

"I…I really don't know," Elsa replied quietly. "They do run in my family. That I do know. I suppose they're a recessive gene of some kind. As for how they work, they are simply part of me. I do _not_ 'cast spells' or consult any weird supernatural identities or anything like that; it doesn't work that way." Elsa paused, trying to figure out how to explain herself without giving away a ton of personal information. While she was a hundred percent sure her visitors were safe to talk to, she still had no desire to expose vulnerable aspects of herself to virtual strangers. Just…no. _They've probably seen the movie, you know. So you've already been exposed emotionally._ This thought made Elsa's cheeks turn bright red in embarrassment, and her pale skin did nothing to help hide the blushing. She finally just closed her eyes and said, "My powers are tied to my emotions." There. She had admitted it. If these people laughed at her or something, then so be it.

"Could you…show us something?" Ahmed briefly wondered why the girl's magic wasn't doing something right that second, seeing as she was definitely embarrassed, but figured she probably had good control of it now, most likely.

Elsa nodded and simply held out her signature snowflake hovering over her good hand with a smile. _I shouldn't show them something big right off the bat; I don't want to scare them._ "That's my signature snowflake," she said with an ever so slight hint of pride. "And for what it's worth, I made my dress with my magic, too."

Salma smiled. She was actually a fashion designer, and she thought Elsa's dress was lovely. She certainly wouldn't wear it, but still. "Is it difficult to make whatever ice magic substance your dress is made of? I actually design clothes and the like, and it takes a long time to actually…design things, if that makes sense."

Elsa shook her head. "Oh no. The only thing is that sometimes my magic does…funny things when I make clothes with it. I don't really like making clothes with it very much, even though I like the dresses I've made. I'd rather build things, like my ice palace or the pool out in the castle gardens. Or the ice amusement park you may have seen before you came in. I love drawing blueprints and designing imaginary buildings by hand on paper, although I haven't done so in awhile."

"You're an engineer like Ahmed," Salma said, smiling.

Elsa's happy expression grew curious. "That is your job, sir?"

"Yes, Queen Elsa. I work at a firm in New York City," Ahmed told her, visibly surprised that the young queen enjoyed drawing blueprints and the like. "I think your friend Kiara has been traipsing about for awhile. She found us in Ohio, wondering how to get here. We were on a 'short vacation', potentially staying away permanently. If we do decide to stay, which I think we will, I'll need to tell my firm I am not returning."

"Staying here without telling your employer ahead of time could potentially just make you more of a target, though," Elsa told them, a thoughtful look on her face. "Perhaps you could go back and actually give notice an appropriate amount of time beforehand and then come back? I'm not trying to send you away; it's just a suggestion. You are welcome to stay in Arendelle if you like, or at some point in the future if you need a safer place to stay."

The young couple honestly didn't want to leave their U.S. home permanently; both of them had a few relatives in New York City itself, and other parts of the surrounding area. Elsa's suggestion to come back at some point in the future if need be was appealing. At least they had found a good area to move to if they ever needed to. Ahmed decided they would return home to New York immediately before his vacation time was up. "Thank you for your kindness, Queen Elsa. I imagine we will most likely be back at some point in the future."

Elsa nodded politely. "You're welcome."

* * *

Later that afternoon after Salma and Ahmed had left by themselves, Elsa tried her best to comfort a rather sulky Kiara in the library. Elsa had been delighted to see her friend again, but she knew Kiara was unhappy for some reason. She was trying to hide it by appearing grumpy and sullen, but Elsa knew better. Grumpy and sullen Kiara was the same Kiara she'd seen when she met the girl for the first time. It meant Kiara was hiding something to avoid hurting or dealing with it or appearing so-called 'weak'. "Kiara, what is wrong?" Elsa asked straight-out.

"I don't wanna talk about it," Kiara spat, her dark hair falling in her face so Elsa couldn't read her.

"I know that. Tell me anyway. Maybe I can help. If not, then you won't have lost anything," Elsa retorted.

Kiara's green eyes burned with tears. She would not cry. She wouldn't. And she would not intrude in Elsa's home any longer. She jumped up and grabbed her suitcase and ran for the door to the library.

Elsa froze the door shut.

"That's no fair, Elsa! You can't do that! I want to go!" Kiara screeched. She was acting like a baby, and she knew it, which just made her all the more angry. "Snow Queen Elsa, you let me out!" Kiara pounded on the door, but Elsa's ice stood firm and didn't give.

Elsa managed to keep her voice calm as she limped over to her upset friend. "Kiara, put the suitcase down. Neither of us are leaving this library until you tell me what's wrong." She tried to give Kiara a hug, but the younger girl shoved her away, and the unexpected force made her stumble backwards and fall. Elsa wasn't hurt, just all the more worried for her friend. Kiara never treated her like that, not even when Kiara was angry with her. The next thing she knew, Kiara had flung the heavy suitcase aside and plopped down on the floor in tears. "Kiara?" Elsa asked tentatively, scooting closer to Kiara. "Won't you please tell me what's wrong?"

Kiara jerked her head up and just glared at Elsa, her green eyes sharp. "You can't fix it. I messed everything up. I don't know where to go. I feel like I'm in the way here and yet I feel like I kinda just abandoned you, too. You're my best friend, and I just left! And I want my stupid magic back!"

"You didn't abandon me, Kiara, and you are _not_ in the way here," Elsa told her friend firmly. "You didn't 'mess everything up', either." She slowly put her arm around the younger girl's shoulders, unsure if Kiara would protest or not, but Kiara stayed quiet and said nothing. "Kiara, I could take you to visit the trolls if you'd like, but I don't think you can get your powers back," Elsa added gently. "That was a permanent decision, and I'm pretty sure you know that."

Kiara scowled and grumpily scooted closer to Elsa. Elsa's nice cool hug was actually kind of warm…inside. Elsa cared about her. She was trying to be honest and yet comfort her at the same time. She wasn't trying to take advantage of her or blame her for horrible things she didn't do. Or ignore her. Maybe hugs weren't so terrible if they were actually genuine. "Well, I want them back," Kiara muttered childishly, but she wasn't quite so angry and upset anymore. "They were mine, and I threw them away, and that was dumb."

"You were so sure you didn't want them anymore before. What changed your mind, and why did you choose to get rid of them in the first place?" Elsa kept her voice calm and non-accusatory, wanting her friend to think through what she'd chosen to do and _why_. Maybe that would make Kiara feel better. _Gerda always makes me talk things out when I'm upset, so it should work for Kiara, too._

"I don't feel safe on my own without them," Kiara admitted. "Don't you dare tell anybody I said that, Snow Queen Elsa! It's _embarrassing!_ I have to be fine on my own. So there." After a moment's hesitation, Kiara added, "Nasty memories, and I felt really horrible for hurting you like that. You were the only person who'd been a real friend to me, and I made it so you couldn't walk anymore. And…and you were still so _nice._ Why did you _do_ that?!"

Elsa gave Kiara a lopsided smile. "Because you're my friend, that's why. Friends forgive each other. And besides that, what good would it have done to be mean to you? Holding a grudge was not going to fix crippled legs, period. It was over and done." She paused before pointing out the nice thing Kiara had done. "Kiara, you did partly heal me by giving up your magic. If you hadn't done that, I'd still be paralyzed. At least I can walk again, even if I still have to wear that," she added, pointing at her brace. Elsa didn't add that Kiara would have been able to completely heal her when she'd gotten older and her magic was stronger; she did _not_ want to make her friend any more upset than she already was.

"Weren't you at least a _little bit_ mad at me?" Kiara asked curiously, wiping her tears away in irritation. She hated crying; in front of Elsa, it was sort of ok, but anyone else? No way.

Elsa shook her head. "No, Kiara," she said honestly. "I felt upset about it, but I was not mad at you." Looking back now, Elsa honestly wasn't sure why she had managed to remain mostly calm and unaffected inside about it. Yes, she had cried at first when Dr. Raske had said she probably would never be able to walk again, but she had never felt particularly horrified or anything, either. She'd been far more upset that her father might think she was 'broken' than that the injury might be permanent. _Maybe I was still just kind of…shocked about it and didn't really think about it beyond 'I can't walk and I'm scared Papa won't want me'. I don't know._

"But what if getting rid of my magic _hadn't_ helped you?"

"I still wouldn't be mad. Kiara, look at me, please." Elsa put her good hand on her friend's shoulder and looked her right in the eyes. "Kiara. I want you to listen to me, and listen well. You did not injure me on purpose. You're an eleven-year-old girl that made the simple mistake of trusting the wrong people. Yes, you should have been able to realize what bad people you were supporting without having to see me injured, but it _is_ an honest mistake all the time. I _know_ you knew what you were doing was wrong. I know you did. If I were to blame someone for what happened, I'd blame your brother, not you. But I'm not mad at him, either. Well, not for that. I'll have to admit I'm still mad at him for what he did to Anna last year…anyways, that's not the point. My point is that you are completely forgiven. Let it go. All you're doing is making yourself upset."

Kiara mulled over what Elsa had said for a minute. _Wait a minute…she still holds a grudge if someone hurts Anna? Just not herself?_ "Um…Snow Queen Elsa? If…if I'd hurt Anna instead of you, would you be mad?" she asked quietly.

Elsa looked down at her hands and said nothing. _Yes. I'd still say it was an accident, but yes, I'd be mad. Anna's different than I am. She would have been a lot more upset than I was. She would've missed climbing trees and ice skating and things and felt like she would go stir-crazy. And considering what Grand Pabbie said, that electrical shock Kiara gave me wouldn't have just injured someone else…it would've killed them…_

"So you're saying by not saying anything that you weren't-aren't-mad at me for hurting you, but you would be if it'd been Anna?" Kiara suddenly felt so angry she wanted to scream. Angry at herself. Angry at every single person that had ever hurt her best friend. Elsa seemed mostly all right inside now, but she evidently still didn't value herself properly. Kiara remembered asking Elsa's mother right after the whole cave incident why Elsa seemed so…uncaring about herself. That had been before she and Anna had figured out how to get Rapunzel to Arendelle to heal Elsa, especially those horrible burns on Elsa's hands. Now Kiara reached for her friend's hand and just held it tightly. " _Why_?" Kiara still could not understand how Elsa could think like she did. _Nobody_ in her family acted like that. Not one.

"My job is to protect others, not myself," Elsa replied stiffly, which really didn't answer Kiara's question. " _Especially_ Anna. She's my little sister," she added, as if that explained everything.

Kiara frowned. _She_ was a little sister too, and her older siblings definitely did not treat her the way Elsa treated her own little sister. Kiara decided she thought Anna was spoiled and Elsa was very dumb, but she did not voice this. "Snow Queen Elsa…what I did wasn't an 'accident'. You're right-I did know it was wrong. I could've stopped on my own, and I…didn't." Kiara's expression was pinched; she hated admitting to doing something that wrong, but it was true. She _knew_ it was. And still Elsa was sitting beside her with a comforting arm around her shoulders.

"But you are admitting that it was wrong, that it was a mistake," Elsa told her quietly. "And," she added with a lopsided smile, "I can tell that you really hate admitting to being wrong, so that makes your admission worth all the more."

Kiara didn't seem to have heard. "Is it uncomfortable?" she asked all of a sudden, frowning at her friend's braced leg.

Elsa shrugged as she glanced at it herself. "Not _uncomfortable_ , really, just a bit strange. I've gotten used to it. I know my leg needs the support, so that makes me not mind it much." Her blue eyes grew sad as she continued, "What bothers me is people thinking there's something wrong with me because of it. That's all." _There is nothing wrong with me, not for that reason. I know there's not._ She forced a smile and just changed the subject. She was supposed to be _helping_ Kiara, not making her more upset. "Now what do you need help with?"

Kiara hesitated. _I shouldn't ask Snow Queen Elsa for help. She doesn't owe me that or anything else. But…nobody's going to help except her. I know that for a fact._ "What am I gonna do?" she asked finally. She needed help. Deep inside, she knew she wasn't old enough to 'make it' on her own, no matter how much she pretended otherwise. Her home country was not a home to her any longer; she would never inherit the throne anyway, not with so many siblings in front of her.

Elsa struggled to her feet and then held out her hand to Kiara. "I actually do have an idea for that, but I don't think you're going to like it," she told Kiara, giving her another lopsided smile.

"Well, what is it?"

"Your brother Hans's sentence is up soon. While I haven't talked to him, I _highly_ doubt if he wants to return to the Southern Isles either. Why don't you talk it over with him?" Elsa suggested. "Maybe you two could make a life for yourselves on your own somewhere if you don't wish to stay here. I am _not_ having Hans stay in my castle, even though I wouldn't mind if you did."

Kiara snorted at that. "You really think that stupid brother of mine is going to want me around? Snow Queen Elsa, you think all siblings are supposed to treat each other like you and Anna treat each other. Well, reality check. We don't. _You_ would die for Anna, and so would-did-Anna for you. Do you really think Hans would do that for me? To be honest, _I_ don't know whether I'd do that. I'd let myself be hurt if it kept that drip safe, but I don't think I'd actually be willing to die for him. Actually I _know_ I wouldn't." _Now Elsa's going to think I'm selfish. And she'd be right._

But Elsa just smiled at her friend. She didn't understand _not_ being willing to do that, but Kiara was not her, so maybe Kiara's logic was just different. "I think you care more about your brother than you let on, and I think if the situation called for it, you'd do what needed to be done."

* * *

"Elsa, could I ask you a question? Like, by yourself?" Nikoleta asked hesitantly right after dinner.

"Sure. We can just go up to your room or something. Or the library," Elsa suggested, pushing her chair away from the table. She turned to Kiara for a moment and added, "You go talk to your brother, please. You don't have to tell me what you two say, but you do have to go talk to him. Then you can go out to the pool with everyone else if you like."

Kiara huffed but did as she was told. Kristoff and Anna took Eliot and Anikka out to the pool.

As Elsa headed toward the stairs and ice-elevator with Nikoleta, Elsa unexpectedly received a message from Linnae. _Hi, Elsa! I am still fine, of course. I have something you must know. There are bad people here-I do not mean genuine government people that want to use you and me, I mean bad humans that are working_ against _the government. They are planning something very bad for when the president comes to visit Arendelle. They want the flying machine he is in to explode and then blame it on you so they have an excuse to capture you by force. And the visit thing has been pushed up to tomorrow, too. Be careful, Elsa, please. As a bit of good news, Katie and her parents are safe. The genuine government people were talking about it. They even got paid a bunch of money for 'emotional distress' and to keep their mouths shut about what happened. Elsa, I have to go. I think one of the bad humans is a bit suspicious that I understand more than I let on. More later._ Elsa quickly replied, _Thank you, Linnae. I won't message you myself then. Just say more whenever you can._

"Was that a dragon-message?" Nikoleta asked curiously. She had noticed that Elsa's blue eyes had glowed ever so slightly, not creepily or unnaturally so, but unnatural for Elsa's normal appearance. That was the only logical explanation she could think of to explain that.

Elsa nodded. "Linnae is fine, and the little girl I met in the United States and her parents are safe as well. Linnae was also able to confirm my original suspicions that I thought were just paranoid are correct. There's some kind of nasty group infiltrating their government. From the bit Linnae told me, I think both the bad group and the actual agency want me for the same reasons. They just want a…a test subject. A weapon they can reproduce themselves." Elsa's blue eyes were bright with tears, but she did not actually start crying. "I…I don't want to be an experiment trapped in a c-cage when I'm not wanted…"

Nikoleta slipped her arm around the older girl's shoulders and gave her a reassuring squeeze. "They'd have to catch you first," Nikoleta pointed out, "and I bet-if you planned _everything_ out ahead of time and tried to think of _everything_ that could possibly go wrong-you could probably pretend to give yourself up and expose these creepy bad people. The actual government people that want you aren't going to want you injured because then you'll be no good for anything they want you for. So you could use that to your advantage, right?" Nikoleta was going to apologize for meddling in government business, but then she saw Elsa's expression brighten and knew she was saying the right things. "Actually, the bad creepy people don't want you injured either, most likely. They'd just want you to not fight back."

Elsa didn't say anything more about the whole issue, but she did give Nikoleta a small smile and just say thank-you. _Maybe Niko is right. I'll have to think about it…_ "Now what was it you originally wanted to ask me?" she asked as she plopped down on a sofa in the library.

Nikoleta's cheeks turned a bit pink as she sat down on the other end of the sofa. "Well…while you were gone on your United States trip, I got to talk to Espen a bit, but then I got excited and I kind of…rambled about a bunch of nonsense at him. He's gotta think I'm an idiot now! Can you…well, that is…um…do you have any helpful advice, Elsa? I was going to ask Anna, but, well, I thought she might think I was just being silly since it seems so easy for her to talk to Kristoff."

"Niko, Anna will have known Kristoff for a whole year soon. She's engaged, too. You don't know Espen very well yet. And Anna wouldn't think you were being silly." Elsa thought for a minute, wondering what she should say. She had no experience with romantic things; she had never even _met_ some boy she liked. The only thing she had that could possibly help Nikoleta was the fact that she had trouble talking to people sometimes herself, but she was more than a little certain that her socializing issues weren't the same as feeling uncomfortable around a boy you liked. "I don't know how to help. I've never met anyone I liked," Elsa said quietly. Then, realizing that her last sentence sounded like she hated every person she met, "Well, not anyone I _like_ liked, if you know what I mean."

Nikoleta smiled at that. "Yeah, I understand what you meant."

"Maybe you could take him some cookies," Elsa suggested after a moment. "Or some chocolate. _Everyone_ loves dessert. There are these fancy candy boxes at the chocolate shop. You could make a card and put it in with the chocolates."

Nikoleta made a face. "Isn't that kind of _forward_? I thought when a boy gave a girl chocolates, that's supposed to be all romantic and stuff."

This was a surprise to Elsa, who had always seen Gerda and Kai giving her boxes of chocolate when she'd been stuck in her room, and had given Anna chocolates for her birthday, and had seen Anna give Kristoff chocolates (and then eat most of them), and seen her mother send some to Aunt Primrose before the accident, and so on. Chocolate was a good present for anything to her. "I don't _think_ so. I didn't say write some mushy love letter that makes you want to throw up," Elsa deadpanned.

"That's true," Nikoleta said, giggling. She could tell Elsa was slightly amused with herself with her 'mushy love letter that makes you want to throw up' line, and seeing Elsa's deadpan expression along with her blue eyes twinkling mischievously made Nikoleta laugh.

Elsa suddenly remembered something else that made her start giggling herself. "Once when I was little-before the accident, I mean-my father had guests in the castle around Valentine's Day. There was this supercilious snobby girl, and I wrote multiple silly valentines to that girl without signing it and left it out where everyone would see it. There was a big ruckus about it. I thought it was hilarious," she explained.

"What did you write?"

" 'Roses are red, violets are blue, snobs stink, and so do you.' 'And 'I like flowers, I like chocolate, you're as sweet as acetate.' Among others. One in which I called her every…hmm… _colorful_ word I'd heard in my life." Elsa tried her best to stifle her laughter when she saw her friend's confused and horrified expression. "No, I was _not_ always a sweet little kid. Sometimes I was a little brat."

"What on earth is 'acetate'?" Nikoleta asked curiously. Somehow she just couldn't picture Elsa acting like that, even as a child.

"It's a salt of acetic acid. Acetic acid gives vinegar its characteristic taste," Elsa explained. "So calling someone 'sweet as acetate' was _not_ very nice. At seven, I thought that was pretty funny, and I felt quite pleased that I knew what a weird word like that meant. I don't even remember where I learned it. Probably from Gerda in the kitchen when she was cooking with vinegar, most likely."

Nikoleta just stared in surprise as she pictured Queen Elsa as a mischievous little girl who would purposely cause trouble like that-and then proceed to think it was funny. _Grown-up_ Elsa thought it was funny! As Nikoleta looked at Elsa now, she did see mischievous little girl Elsa in those twinkling blue eyes, right along with the grown-up Elsa she knew. "Thank you, Q-Elsa. For the suggestion and everything."

"You're welcome."

 **A/N: What Salma and Ahmed told Elsa about being a target because of a few bad people is very true, at least where I live. (I have no idea if it's like that in New York City-I don't live there, lol.:P) It isn't fair. Guys, chances are if you know a Muslim person, he or she is FINE. That does _NOT_ make them ISIS supporters. In fact, I have a friend on this site who's Muslim (I'm sure you know who you are:)). I have no intentions of going into a giant preachy message in the actual story-I just wanted to say this because it's _not fair_ and it's _wrong_. Okay, I shall step off my soapbox now.:)**

 **Next chapter coming soon!:)**


	28. Chapter 28

**A/N: Thanks to everyone who's followed/favorited and/or is reading but not reviewing!:)**

 **(BTW, the site just ate my entire A/N for replying to reviews, and I am very grumpy at the moment...-_- I am trying rewrite all those replies right now-I'll edit them in when I'm done. :P)**

 **FluffyKitten-It's not just you-Elsa IS getting better.:) As far as Elsa's impenetrable ice is concerned, logically it can stop _anything_ if she has enough time time to construct it, heh heh. Its one weakness would be magic fire of the same strength, which no one has any access to, obviously. :P Do remember that absolutely impentrable ice is more tiring for her to make than regular ice or even her usual much-stronger-than-normal-but-not-completely-impenetrable ice she makes by default. (That is what her ice palace is made of, for example.) The fact that the ice is meltable or unmeltable has nothing to do with its strength otherwise. I thought so too-Kristoff is right; Elsa _needs_ a chance to be able to do things on her own sometimes or she won't heal properly inside. Yes, Kristoff and Anna are engaged, because back when the girls' parents first came back, Elsa didn't want her father looking for suitors for Anna, so she told him they were engaged! Elsa's eyes just glow a tiny bit when she contacts Linnae-I just didn't think it was logical for telepathic messages like that to have NO outward sign at all.:P I like long reviews, and thank you for the encouragement.:)**

 **raven678-I like confident-Elsa too.:) She still needs more time to heal inside, but she's much, much better.:) Thank you! More on the TV show and what Kiara is up to soon.:)**

 **IndyGirl89-You made me laugh when you pointed out that everything was going eerily right in the US right up until the car crash.:P I just didn't find it logical that nothing bad would happen, considering that Kai has no driving experience and someone could recognize Elsa! Those ice tablets of Ingrid's are very important and hold some valuable info.:) And Anna won't be happy if she ever found the water-cans Elsa's making, but in Elsa's mind, she's just thinking that she won't live forever and she wants to do something to keep her country safe after she's gone. And yet she can't tell anyone what she's doing, because that risks someone stealing the very things she wants to protect Arendelle to threaten it. She's pretty much making a room full of unique and valuable weapons. And yes, Nikoleta's getting sweet on Espen. :P**

 **orang biasa-Yay, you're back! :) Yes, I do think including a topic like religious discrimination could be touchy, and that's why I didn't go into a ton of detail. It's also why there are characters that believe different things that are both good and bad (Elsa and Anna and their family are Christians, but Hans and his family say they are too. Kiara doesn't like religion at all because she thinks religious people are mostly snobby. Salma and Ahmed are Muslim and are good guy characters, and they point out to Elsa that there are a few bad people making them look bad. Etc.) I HATE discrimination of any kind-it makes me so mad. Grr. With what's going on with ISIS and stuff, I just felt like somebody needed to say that being Muslim doesn't make him/her bad. It's ridiculous how prejudiced people can get... And I agree with you that it happens to anyone that's different from the majority, which again, isn't fair. -_-Anyways...I'll shut up now.:) I have no wish to start a fight with someone on here. :P Lol, don't think the story progression is slowing down-there's more happening in this chapter!:) And as far as Elsa's odd eagerness about the TV show thing, she still hasn't realized what "being on TV" means; she just likes the premise. (I'm thinking of Survivor, by the way...:)) Thank you for the feedback on Kiara's unpredictable behavior! Part of me felt like she was being kind of immature, but then I thought "She IS 12, after all..." :P I like long reviews, by the way.:)**

 **hamba allah- **Thank you.:) I'm not a Muslim, so thanks to your review, I know what those terms mean in Islam now. (Thank you for translating them, Elsa Tomago.:))****

 ** **And to you anonymous reviewer under a bunch of different names...I am POSITIVE you're the same person! Also, _Ingrid cannot meet Elsa!_ Ingrid has been dead for over a century. My Ingrid is NOT the OUAT Ingrid, and in this story-verse, Elsa's mother has only ONE sister, Queen Primrose from Corona (Rapunzel's mother). Nobody is time traveling, either. Also, Elsa will not reply to letters if they are left on this story. Elsa will reply to letters either sent to me via PM or reviews left on Dear Elsa. I am trying very hard not to scratch my head in confusion or bang my head on the computer screen. :P Anyways...:)****

 **On to the story!**

Elsa purposely awoke much earlier than she usually did the next morning, right around sunrise. She had to intercept that flying machine the United States president was on and stop the planned explosion Linnae had warned her about from happening. The question was how to get onto the flying machine thing without being spotted or blown up herself. The night before, she'd received a second message from Linnae with more information. _'The bad terrorist humans will take control of the flying machine-it is called a 'jet', by the way. You have to get into the pilot's area to fix things. If you don't succeed, not only will the jet crash, the explosion will hurt Arendelle, too.'_

Elsa had asked how the bad people could possibly capture her if the flying machine was going to explode, since the saboteurs would be dead. Linnae told her they weren't planning to do it then; they just wanted to cause a scene to make her look bad. No spies in her country, at least not as of yet.

Now Elsa closed her eyes and recreated her armor she'd been working on downstairs in that redecorated cell. It was perfectly clear, so from a distance she would just look like her normal self, if a bit shiny in the light and a little chubbier than normal. Then she put her white knee-length ice-dress with the silvery crystal spaghetti straps over it. She had to alter it a bit to fit over the ice-armor, but it still worked fine. That dress would be the least likely to get in the way if she had to actually fight. _I am not risking tripping over long sparkly capes, even if they look nice. So there._

Then she wrote a note to Gerda saying what she was doing, specifically saying that Anna was not allowed to follow her and that Gerda should keep her home by force if necessary. She could not risk Anna getting hurt. If Anna got mad at her, then so be it. Then Elsa climbed out her window and used her air currents to 'fly' out over the fjord.

* * *

As the minutes passed, Elsa realized she was just wasting precious energy maintaining her hovering position hundreds of feet in the air. And her left wrist, the one she'd sprained in that car accident, was starting to hurt. Even though she could still use her magic with that hand, it was weaker than usual and too much use made it ache.

She had to find some way to remain inconspicuous (ie., not going back and getting her ice-copter) and yet not be wearing herself down for no reason. Then she realized there was a very, very high possibility that she would be able to get onto the president's flying machine and yet not be able to keep it from exploding. If she merely rescued the president and any other innocents and failed to stop the explosion, she would have no way to carry said people safely to the ground.

Just then she heard the loud sounds of an engine. Too late to do anything different. She would have to get onto that flying machine and hope for the best. _Okay, Elsa, you can do this. You_ have _to._ With that, she took off straight up toward the sounds and almost immediately yelped as the thing shot towards her…at a very steep downwards angle. It was _huge._ _I can't let that thing reach Arendelle. Elsa, intercept it. Now. You have to._ The sounds were deafeningly loud now and it made it difficult to think. _Elsa, find the door. Break in if you have to._

 _Elsa, make it snow around the machine,_ a quiet thought ordered. A second later, a cloud formed above the jet and Elsa took off toward it. With luck, this would all be over in a minute.

 _Door. There is the door. Break in. It is probably locked._ Elsa took a deep breath, trying to give herself simple instructions step-by-step that she wouldn't need to think hard about. One step at a time. Within seconds, she was sprawled in the cockpit. The man at the controls screamed.

Elsa sealed the doorframe with ice so neither she nor anyone else could fall out that way.

Then she began to drag herself to her feet…only to find a pistol pointed at her head. The one place she hadn't armored with her ice. Of course. _You just have to react faster than he does, Elsa. Don't bother with using logic on him-there isn't enough time._

The pistol lay covered with ice on the floor a moment later. She'd simply pretended to freeze (figuratively) in terror for a second; then slapped it to the floor an instant later. "Where is the real pilot?" she demanded in the most authoritative tone she could muster. When Elsa heard muffled grunts from behind the copilot's seat, she didn't bother waiting for a reply and simply froze the saboteur in place up to his neck. Then she pulled the bound and gagged pilot out and freed him. "Fix the plane," she ordered. _I don't know how._

The real pilot nodded respectfully, shoved the immobilized would-be terrorist aside, and retook his place. Once Elsa was sure the pilot was genuinely trying to help, she quietly went into the passenger area, ready to fight if necessary. _Elsa, stay calm. Stay calm._ She could hear suspicious sounding noises from the engine, like it might be failing. Ominous ticking sounded inside the passenger area. Elsa didn't know where it was coming from, but it did _not_ sound like a clock. It sounded like a timer to her. _The explosive thing?_

Three more saboteurs held the president and what Elsa thought were his bodyguards hostage with guns at point-blank range. They hadn't heard or seen her, so she simply crept a bit closer…and her braced leg made her trip over something on the floor, although she didn't actually fall. Too late, she realized she should have just frozen them in place like she had the one in the cockpit. Elsa still wasn't particularly good in a combat situation; her thought process just didn't function that way easily and she would think of the best thing to do seconds too late. _Stupid, Elsa. Stupid, stupid, stupid._ Something slammed her in the chest, and she stumbled back against the wall. Without giving herself a chance to recover, she 'returned fire'. Two of her ice blasts hit her targets and left them immobilized, but the third went wide.

A second bullet hit the wall so close to her she felt it graze her hair. _Elsa, get yourself together! Now!_ Elsa's ice-armor was indeed bulletproof, so that first bullet hadn't hurt her, but the impact still shook her up all over. Elsa let loose another blast of ice. This time it knocked the weapon out of the man's hand, although she still didn't immobilize him.

With the hijacker weaponless, the president's bodyguards immediately took him down. "There's a small detonator explosive in here like a bomb," one of them said quickly. "It can't be deactivated, though. We have to get out of here."

Elsa blinked in confusion. "I thought they were disabling the engine itself somehow?"

"They did, Queen Elsa," the president told her. He had absolutely no doubt of who this girl was whatsoever, of course. "The detonator is what you tripped over when you came in." He had immediately noticed Elsa when she'd entered, but he'd refused to react, hoping that would give her the chance to do something to help. It had worked, too. "We have to get out of here before it explodes. We only have a few seconds now!"

Elsa quickly reached for the bomb thing and stared at it closely. _What can I do to stop this thing?_ While Elsa had read a bit about bombs in one of the books she'd bought on her U.S. visit, she just didn't know enough about them. _Freeze it, Elsa. Just freeze it._

The last thing Elsa saw was one of the hijackers grinning at her before the thing went off. _Freeze over the fjord so the pilot can land. Now._

* * *

Back at the castle, Gerda had found Elsa's note and immediately woken Anna up. Anna was terrified of what could happen with Elsa going off on her own like that. "Gerda, I gotta go after her!" Anna cried, running out into the courtyard.

Gerda just gave the princess a hug. "You can't, princess," she said quietly. "In this case, your sister really does have a better chance on her own. If she was smart, she armored herself, and most likely she'll be fine. Whether she successfully stops this from happening, I don't know."

Just as Gerda said that, Anna heard-and saw-an odd-looking sight far above them and over the fjord. _Something_ had indeed exploded, but it looked somehow subdued, as if someone had tried to control it and didn't entirely succeed. There was a thin stream of fire or whatever was in it shooting straight up, along with bits of sparkling blue…somethings. Anna screamed. She had no doubt Elsa was up there. What had her sister done? What if she was hurt? Or…dead? " _Gerda, I want Elsa!_ " she screeched desperately.

"You can't leave, Miss Anna. Your sister specifically wrote not to let you." Gerda held Anna tightly, but the princess continued struggling.

"I don't care! She's _my_ sister, and I gotta find her!" Anna was crying now. She was terrified something horrible had happened to Elsa and she wouldn't be there to help her or even see her. Anna let Gerda drag her back inside, but she was still angry and scared. Maybe Elsa was fine? _She can't possibly be, though._ Usually optimistic Anna immediately jumped to the worst conclusion. If Elsa was gone, then the least she could do was follow her last wish, right? _That's dumb. Elsa's prob'ly fine. She has to be._ Anna finally just ran upstairs and into her room. She glanced at the section of the wall where Elsa had shown her the entrance into the secret passages. She thought about a younger Elsa hidden behind that wall, lonely and frightened, and suddenly she felt just plain _angry_. It wasn't fair. Not to her and especially not to Elsa.

Anna finally simply flung herself on her bed and cried. _I want Elsa back. Now._

* * *

"Ma'am, she saved our lives," the pilot repeated to Gerda for the third time. He was wringing his hat in his hands and looked terrified. What would these people do to them? "I did fix the controls, but she's the one who took care of the detonator."

"I have heard that three times now. Where is Queen Elsa?" Gerda demanded. She refused to believe Elsa could even possibly be gone until it was completely proven otherwise.

"She's…she's right here," one of the bodyguards said quietly, handing Elsa to Gerda.

Gerda frowned as she carefully took Elsa in her arms. There was a soft blanket around her, and she wasn't moving. Gerda gasped when she gently folded the blanket away from Elsa's face. She had painful-looking burns all over her cheek, and she sounded a little like she was having trouble breathing. "What _happened_?" Then, "Wait, never mind what happened. I need to get her help. Now." Gerda quickly directed the others to the Great Hall and told Kai to stay with them. Then she asked a guard to fetch two others and head to the Great Hall as well. Usually Gerda didn't have authority to do such things, but everyone listened to her when they realized what had happened.

After all that was taken care of, Gerda quickly carried Elsa to the infirmary. "Dr. Raske, please help her. Please. She's going to be ok, right?" _Should I go get Anna…? No, I should wait until Elsa's taken care of._

Elsa was breathing normally now, but she still didn't move or react in any way. Gerda just stroked her hair lightly, hoping it might help her feel better. She could see tears in the corners of Elsa's eyes, and that just made Gerda worry more, although that meant she couldn't be completely unconscious.

Dr. Raske smiled reassuringly at Gerda a minute later. "It looks worse than it is, honestly. That won't feel good when she wakes up, but she should be all right. I don't know what happened, but this ice…armor, I suppose you could call it, seems to have protected the rest of her."

"She tried to keep an explosive from going off. I'm still not entirely sure what she did, though," Gerda replied. "I think she wasn't able to do it fast enough before it went off, maybe." She gently lifted one of Elsa's hands and nodded. "Look. Miss Elsa's palm looks like it's…mildly sunburned or something. She must have started to contain it but didn't get to finish before it exploded on her." Gerda couldn't decide whether to be proud of Elsa or just plain horrified. Realizing what must have happened made Gerda think those burns on Elsa's face weren't so horrible at all. Those would heal. Elsa could have quite literally blown herself to bits, letting some explosive thing go off in her face like that.

Elsa shifted uncomfortably and opened her eyes a bit. _I feel like my face is on fire._ "I…must have…failed," she murmured to herself. It hurt to talk, so she didn't say anything else. _Wait…if I failed, why am I even alive? That doesn't make sense. And where am I?_

 _You're at home, Elsa. There's Gerda. Whatever happened, you are safe now._

 _It hurts. It really hurts. I hate burns. I really, really hate them._ Not only was Elsa's pale, cool skin particularly sensitive to burns, they reminded her of the whole cave incident thing that she dearly wanted to forget. She tensed up all over as she gingerly tried to move her fingers and then instantly relaxed when her hands just felt all tingly. That was uncomfortable, but she knew she could still channel her magic through her hands like normal if she wanted to. They weren't burnt, at least not badly.

"You did not fail, Miss Elsa. I still don't quite know what happened, but you did stop that explosive thing enough that the flying machine didn't completely explode and you and the people you were trying to help are safe." Gerda continued stroking Elsa's hair while Dr. Raske took care of her. She would not let Elsa feel nervous or upset again. "Could you dissolve your ice-armor? You might feel more comfortable that way."

Elsa just looked at her with worried, half-open eyes and did nothing, although she tried to move away when Dr. Raske tried to tend to her face. _What if those bad people come back? I'm…scared._

"Miss Elsa, hold still," Gerda said firmly. "You are safe at home. Not trying to save yourself or others again."

"It…hurts." Elsa tried to talk while moving her mouth as little as possible, but it still stung and throbbed and just generally felt awful. She could feel tears filling her eyes again, and she suddenly wanted her little sister there with her. _I got to make sure Anna's safe._ "Where's…An…Anna?"

"I know it hurts, but you've got to hold still, Queen Elsa," Dr. Raske said gently but firmly. "Would you like some pain medicine?"

Predictably enough Elsa shook her head. No, she did _not_ want any pain medicine. She wished she'd just moved faster trying to keep that explosive bomb thing from going off. _I_ know _I could have kept it from exploding at all if I'd had just a few more seconds. I must have almost done it, too, because my hands are mostly okay and I was literally holding it. There must have just been a tiny area I hadn't encased in impenetrable ice yet when it went off. I remember I tried to turn my face away and there was some awful noise. That must be when I got burned. After that, I…fell, maybe? I don't know._

* * *

Soon Elsa felt Gerda picking her up again and carrying her somewhere. _Probably my room,_ Elsa thought to herself. She felt tired, and she realized Dr. Raske must have given her something to help her rest better without her knowing. This made her grumpy, but she said nothing. _I'm safe at home with Gerda. I know I am._ With that thought, she dispelled her armor, which left her in just her now-slightly-too-loose dress. _Much better._

Gerda had been intending on taking Elsa to her room, but then thought better of it and took her to Anna's instead. Anna was probably in there, and she was probably deathly worried about what could have happened to her big sister. "Miss Anna? I have a visitor for you," Gerda announced in a cheerful voice.

"Go 'way, Gerda!" Anna's distraught order came from inside the room.

"M…maybe…Anna…not want t'see…me," Elsa tired, pained voice said softly.

"Nonsense. She was worried you were _dead_ , Miss Elsa, you silly girl," Gerda told her. "I'm sure she'll be very happy to see you." Without waiting for Anna to say anything else or Elsa to reply, Gerda simply pushed the door open with her foot, since it wasn't even all the way closed.

"I said go away!" Anna shouted. She didn't pick her head up from her pillows until she felt a cool hand on her arm. That could only be one person. "Elsa!" Anna exclaimed eagerly, her face abruptly all smiles. "Elsa?" Anna's voice was suddenly horrified, and her smile disappeared. Her big sister had almost half her face bandaged, and her pale skin was mottled red on her neck and the rest of her face. She looked like she'd been really badly sunburned. Anna didn't want to think about whatever was under those bandages. Probably stupid nasty burns. _At least Elsa's alive, right? What if she gets all upset again? And it prob'ly really, really hurts._ Anna immediately just gave Elsa a hug and held her tightly. Whatever trouble Elsa had gotten into this time, she was alive and she didn't seem horribly upset. That was enough for Anna.

"That…bad…is it?" Elsa tried to give her little sister a smile, but it turned into a wince instead. She would have to just talk and make faces as little as possible until her skin healed some. She could see Anna starting to cry and shook her head a bit. "No…no crying. Queen's orders."

Gerda touched both girls' shoulders lightly. "Miss Anna, your sister will be fine, but it's going to hurt her to talk for awhile. She can't hold meetings right now, obviously, so you're going to need to talk to that United States president and his bodyguards or whatever yourself. And you, Miss Elsa…just lay still and rest. Don't try to talk. You're going to be fine."

Anna scowled and crossed her arms. "They can just go back where they came from. I don't care. My sister got hurt trying to protect them!" After a pause, she added, "I want to get Rapunzel. I won't have my sweet big sister lying here in pain because of those awful burns on her face. So there."

"She was protecting her own reputation too, Miss Anna," Gerda reminded her. "Should those bad terrorist people have succeeded, they would have blamed the incident on her. Stupid since she controls ice, not fire…but…anyways…You are the queen's second-in-command, Princess Anna," she finished firmly.

Elsa gave Gerda's hand a grateful squeeze, hoping she would understand. _I do need Anna to take care of things right this second. And I hope she does find a way to get Rapunzel-I don't have time to be hurt badly enough I can't work properly._

"Well…then you have to stay with Elsa, Gerda," Anna decided. One look at Elsa's not-even-on-purpose puppy-dog eyes made her change her mind. If taking care of things would make Elsa happy, then that was what she would do. _I'll make Elsa proud. So there._ "I don't want her left alone."

Gerda immediately nodded. "Very well, princess."

The second Anna was gone, Elsa's blue eyes filled with tears and she began crying. She had managed to hold it together for Anna, but once she was gone, she just couldn't do it anymore. Gerda gently scooped her up and held her close. " _Please_ try to stop crying, Miss Elsa. You're just going to make the burns hurt worse," she said gently. "Try to get to sleep instead."

"I… _hate_ …burns," was all Elsa said in reply. _Elsa, get it together. It's not even like it's your hands. Ignore it._

 _What if it scars? Then Mama and Papa_ really _won't want me. They'll think I'm ugly and embarrassing._

 _Elsa, stop it. That's dumb. YOU don't care that much. You're just worried about someone else's opinion, you idiot!_

Gerda just continued holding her. She had a sickening feeling that Elsa wasn't crying just because she was in pain; she was crying because something was making her upset. She looked scared. _Why would Elsa be scared? I know she knows she's safe now. I know she does._ Gerda helped the injured girl sit up and then let her lean against her shoulder while she stroked Elsa's hair gently. "It's all right, Miss Elsa. You are safe at home with people that love you."

"Not…Mama and…P-Papa," Elsa choked out. "Not…not want m-me like…like this."

"Oh, Miss Elsa, no. No, no, no." Gerda instantly understood what Elsa meant. "They are not here, and even if they were, it doesn't matter. Miss Elsa, I still think you're a lovely girl, burns on her face or no. I don't care. And you know what else? I don't think _you_ care, either, not enough to make you cry anyways." She carefully shifted Elsa in her arms so she could look the girl straight in the eyes. "Miss Elsa, your parents' opinion does not matter, on this or anything else. They are prejudiced and unfair, whether you admit it or not. If they are going to treat you badly just because you're not so-called 'perfect' on the outside, then they aren't worth your time. Do you hear me? Not. Worth. Your. Time."

Elsa's blue eyes grew a bit happier at that, and she slowly nodded.

"And besides that, I have a feeling you aren't going to have to deal with waiting for those burns to heal naturally anyway," Gerda added. "Your sister is stubborn, and I'm sure she'll go get Rapunzel somehow very soon."

Elsa just sighed a bit and closed her eyes. With Gerda's reassuring voice talking to her and Gerda simply holding her, she honestly felt _much_ better, happy even. She had successfully stopped the explosion, thanks to Linnae's warning; she hadn't messed up horribly or done something stupid. No, she hadn't proceeded with her mission _perfectly_ , but that was okay. And her parents weren't here anyway, so they could not make her feel hurt and…messed up again. So there. She made her signature snowflake in one hand, then the other; just to reassure herself that she could do so. _Wait a second…the coolness of my magic makes the bad tingly feeling go away. That actually feels…nice._ With that, she quickly made a palm-sized piece of ice in each hand and just held them. Soon all the tingly feelings were gone. "Gerda?"

"Yes, Miss Elsa, is there something I can get for you?"

Elsa nodded a bit. "Read…Ingrid's ice…diary, please. Attic." _I don't know how I know, but there's_ something _in there that Anna and I are going to need to know to handle this._

* * *

Downstairs, Anna tried her best to take Elsa's place in the Great Hall. _I can't be mean to these dumb people or I'll make Elsa look bad. I gotta be grown-up and polite._ "My sister will be fine, but she shouldn't have had to save you on your own flying machine thing," Anna said now. She stood up straight as tall as she could next to Elsa's throne, not wanting to sit there since that was Elsa's place.

The president looked apologetic but said nothing to that. There was nothing _to_ say. He still didn't understand how Elsa could have known what was going on in the first place. His first thought was that she had been involved in the whole sabotage rigmarole, but that wasn't right. He knew it wasn't. Whatever powers Elsa had that he didn't know about, she was using them for good, not bad.

Kai cleared his throat, trying to smooth over the tense silence. "Perhaps Princess Anna would like to know how you managed to get the flying machine landed after Queen Elsa saved your lives."

"She froze the fjord solid so I could land," the pilot said. "The jet had a hole in the roof-that's the contained small explosion you saw. Everything else is intact. I think your queen would have stopped it entirely if she'd had just a couple seconds more, to be honest."

"And then you brought El-Queen Elsa here?" Anna asked, making sure to refer to her sister as queen in this context. She wanted to make sure these people knew just how much authority Elsa had- _all_ of it. So there.

One of the bodyguards stepped forward and nodded. "Yes, after the bomb went off, she was just lying on the floor clutching what was left of it in her hands. We immediately brought her here. Pardon me for saying so, but she's lucky she's not dead, powers or no. She literally had an explosive go off in her face, and all she got was a few burns. What is that armor substance she was wearing? Whatever it is must be virtually impenetrable."

 _It was Elsa's ice, you idiot. And good job, Elsa-you actually took precautions to protect yourself this time. I gotta tell her that._ Anna bit her lip, wondering what else Elsa would say. She was quite sure that if their places had been reversed, Elsa would _not_ snap at them and say some snarky comment that nasty burns were _not_ lucky. Lucky would be if Elsa wasn't hurt at all. _I don't care. Elsa's not in here-she's upstairs lying in bed with Gerda watching her to make sure she's all right. I'm saying what I want._ "I don't care what you say. Elsa's _my_ big sister, and she's hurt because of you all! That isn't fair. And you dumbheads want her to do who knows what with her!"

Kai cleared his throat again and shook his head lightly at Anna. _Not helpful, princess. Act like a grown-up. You can do it._

"What I meant to say is I think…" _What do I say? I have to say something helpful now._ "I think you owe my sister a complete, honest explanation of what you originally wanted her for after what she did for you," Anna amended. _Much better._

"Why, of course. If she was agreeable and willing to do so, we just wanted to have her participate in a few tests to see if there might be any way to give abilities like hers to others. Also, she would be extremely valuable to scientific research-how she's different than humans, the actual limits of her abilities, things like that."

Anna scowled. "And why would Queen Elsa agree to that? You make it sound like she's some test subject or a…a scientific specimen. Or an alien. She's just a _girl_! A normal human girl like me or anyone else."

"Princess Anna, you have to admit creating ice from nothing and making giant live dragons is definitely not normal. How does she literally create _life_? If she _is_ human, then how did she get those abilities? Is she genetically modified somehow?"

"Of course not! She's human, she's twenty-one years old, and she's _my_ sister! And we have the same human parents! She wasn't adopted, not that there's anything wrong with being adopted, 'cause there isn't, but…yeah. She has the same birth parents I do. So there. My sister didn't _get_ her magic from anywhere-she was just born like that." Anna dearly wished Elsa could be taking care of this instead of her. She could tell the president genuinely didn't mean her sister any harm-he was merely curious about her-but she hated how he evidently thought Elsa wasn't just a girl. He really thought she wasn't even human. _Anna, he is from a different culture than we are. Maybe he really has seen an actual alien and so assumes I am one too,_ Elsa's voice seemed to say, although she knew it was just her own thoughts. "How come you're so sure she's not human?" Anna asked carefully. "Why can't she be a human girl with ice powers caused by a recessive gene?"

"If that _is_ true, wouldn't it have shown up at some point in the past before Queen Elsa? And why didn't my country even know Arendelle _existed_ until not quite a year ago? It's like your country just…appeared one day. I know that sounds ridiculous, but…does Queen Elsa have other abilities too that aren't over ice or snow?"

Anna figuratively froze, unsure what to say to that. Of course, she knew that there _was_ someone else that had had ice powers before Elsa…Ingrid…but she wasn't sure if she should bring that up or not. That could potentially just open another can of worms. _Those ice pane diary things up in the attic! What if Arendelle_ was _connected to the United States at some point in the past? It really doesn't make sense that a huge country with modern technology like the United States wouldn't know about us. Or why Arendelle and the immediate area around it is 'backward' compared to the rest of the world. It's like we're…stuck in time or something. Oh, Elsa, what do I do?! What am I supposed to say? This is just speculation…_

Kai cleared his throat again. "This is speculation, gentlemen. Perhaps you would enjoy a meal in the dining hall?"

Anna immediately nodded. "Yes, yes, yes. The princess demands a…a recess from this meeting," she said, trying to sound authoritative. She had to go talk to Elsa. Now.

* * *

Anna found Elsa sitting up in bed speed-reading through the ice pane diary things. "Elsa, I gotta talk to you. I need your help," she said quickly. "Those U.S. people are having a meal, so we have to figure this out fast." Then she remembered Elsa couldn't talk right now, at least not without causing her pain, and Anna just apologized and gave her a hug instead.

"No, Anna…it…okay. I'm…onto something." Elsa winced and took a deep breath before trying to finish what she needed to say in one go without all the pauses. "Change the subject to the terrorist infiltration issue." Another deep breath. "Give me a chance to put the pieces together here. I…" Elsa had scrunched her eyes shut, trying to keep herself from reacting to the pain. _I don't want to make Anna upset…_ "Send Kristoff to trolls…get crystal so…get Rapunzel. I…I can't…can't function properly like this. Need…me _and_ you, so…stall visitors 'til…t'morrow." _Good grief, Elsa, you sound pitiful. Can't you talk properly, even?_

 _No. It hurts too much. Shut up. Anna understands._

"So go get information about the terrorist infiltration thing and stall the United States visitors until tomorrow so Kristoff can get to the trolls, get a crystal so he can fetch Rapunzel, and then bring her back here so she can heal you. Then we put our heads together and fix everything?" Anna wanted to make sure she knew exactly what Elsa wanted her to do. _She figured out the ice pane diary thing before I did and she wasn't even downstairs. Good job, Elsa._

 _Yes._ Elsa gave Anna a thumbs-up instead of actually saying anything else. She didn't try to smile, but she gave her little sister a hug herself instead. _You can take care of this, Anna. I'm useless right now._

Anna frowned; Elsa seemed tense all over. Usually she was like that when she was frightened or upset, but Anna didn't think her sister felt like that at the moment. Otherwise she wouldn't have given Anna a hug on her own. That meant something else was wrong. _I can't ask Elsa what's the matter-she'll have to talk again._

Elsa caught Anna's worried glance and gave her a reassuring squeeze before gingerly touching her bandaged cheek. "I'm okay. Just…hurts," she said honestly. _And yes, it's making me think about what happened with Jade's cave not all that long ago, but I'm all right. I don't feel like I'm about to panic or anything. Please don't worry about me._

 _I didn't even ask Elsa anything and she still knew what I wanted to know,_ Anna thought. She gave Elsa one last hug before hopping to her feet and turning to Gerda. "Gerda, _please_ don't leave Elsa alone, even for a second. I just…I just don't want her by herself," she said quietly. "And Elsa, I know you're trying to help figure out the mystery, but you're hurt and you need to rest. I'll take care of everything downstairs for now. I promise." _I have to. For Elsa._

* * *

Elsa sighed once Anna was gone. She knew her little sister had just been trying to reassure her so she wouldn't worry too much, but she couldn't help thinking that if Anna could 'take care of everything downstairs for now', then there was no reason for her to be here. Why _did_ she exist? Sure, she had saved the lives of those Americans earlier, but she was just fixing a problem she herself had caused. Now she was taking up Gerda's time again because she was hurt. And Arendelle wouldn't be a source of dissension if it weren't for her. She was a controversial public figure, no way around it. Elsa looked down at her hands and Ingrid's old magic ice in her lap. The ice with what Elsa was _positive_ was the story behind her own family and the mystery with what was going on now.

Gerda gently pulled Elsa close and began stroking her hair. "Miss Elsa, I'm not entirely sure what you're thinking about, but I have a good idea, and I don't think you are being fair to yourself. Your sister did say she could take care of everything… _for now_. That doesn't mean you aren't needed. It means Princess Anna is going to take over things until Queen Elsa is well enough to do so herself. That's it," she said firmly. "You yourself have said multiple times that you wouldn't get rid of your powers if given the chance because they help protect Arendelle, remember?"

Elsa shook her head slightly. "I…not need t'…protect Arendelle…if I didn't…cause trouble…in first…place."

"Miss Elsa, firstly, you need to stop talking for now. I know it's hurting you to do that. Please be quiet. And two, while I don't know much about politics, I do know that small countries can automatically be targets if larger ones are nearby. That has nothing to do with whether or not you have magic, and you know it. Is it possible your magic makes you a controversial topic? Of course, but that is not your fault and it doesn't have to be a bad thing. Even I know an absolute monarch is a controversial public figure, magic or not." Gerda looked Elsa right in the eyes as she added, "I am not sure what is going on, but whatever it is, _you_ are a key figure in how it turns out. Not your sister, not your parents, not me, not your friends. It's _you_. Everyone is merely stalling and treading water, slowing things down until you're 'back in the game', and quite honestly I think you know that. Look at the story of our country's past that's unfolding in these old diary ice panes. Ingrid didn't get her happy ending, but she obviously made an enormous impact on the world around her. She was different, just like you. What's different is that _you_ are going to get your 'happy ending'."

"How…d'you…know?"

Gerda gave Elsa a reassuring smile before simply hugging her close again. "Because unlike Ingrid, _you've_ learned the key to controlling your magic before it was too late." Gerda was a hundred percent sure the woman writing the diary had been similar to Elsa when she was the same age, just perhaps slightly more outspoken. The tone of Ingrid's writing didn't come off naturally shy like Elsa did. If Ingrid had been loved and cared for, her natural personality probably would have been somewhere between Elsa's and Anna's. Deep inside Gerda knew Elsa would still be a little shy and dislike socializing and the like even if she _had_ grown up being treated properly. Growing up isolated in her room had made her hurt inside and emotionally damaged, but she was still the same girl Gerda would have imagined little Elsa to be.

Elsa stayed curled up leaning against Gerda as she continued reading Ingrid's diary, holding it so Gerda could see too. Maybe Gerda was right. People who were different from 'normal' in some way could make an impact on the world around them too, if not more. So there.

A few minutes later, Elsa yelped in embarrassment and clapped her hand over the ice pane she was reading so Gerda couldn't see it.

Gerda frowned and pushed Elsa's hand aside. "Miss Elsa, what on earth is the matter?" Because Elsa read a lot faster than she did, Gerda hadn't read the whole thing yet.

Elsa bit the inside of her lip as she pointed at the section of the diary that had made her react that way. Gerda began reading, but still wasn't quite sure what had embarrassed Elsa like that. _'I asked that Grand Pabbie troll why Eystein lived and the second baby didn't those years ago. An ice mage's body is evidently too cold to let a normal baby grow properly, although a normal person can carry an ice mage baby. That doesn't seem fair, but why would anything be fair? Nothing else is. That troll tried to meddle with my magic cell gene things or whatever so that would not happen to someone after me, but it didn't help much, if at all. So I brought Eystein to Pabbie when he was still a baby instead…Eystein doesn't have the ice powers, but he carries a gene for them. Grand Pabbie tried to alter Eystein's, but he had to stop because it was damaging his body. Neither I nor the troll were sure what that meant at the time, but Grand Pabbie thought it might mean the next person in our family that had the magic wouldn't be able to have babies…I'm sorry, whoever's reading this, if anybody. Later that troll said that the next ice mage would be a girl and that the damage was that she wouldn't have a normal mo-'_ Gerda frowned and pushed Elsa's thumb aside so she could see the rest of the sentence. _Then_ she understood Elsa's reaction. "I'm sorry, Miss Elsa," she said quietly.

Elsa hadn't wanted babies anyway, because the process of how you got a baby was sort of nasty in her mind, but seeing an explanation on paper of why she had never gotten the thing teenage girls were supposed to get, which had subsequently pleased her (because she didn't have to deal with something that sounded awfully yucky) and freaked her out (because she'd thought her body was 'broken' somehow), was embarrassing. At least this gave her yet another reason to not get married. You were supposed to get married to have babies, and if she couldn't do that anyway, then that was a very good reason to not get married. She had Anikka, and if she wanted an actual baby of her own, she would just adopt one. So there.

* * *

A sudden thought made Elsa sit up straight a short while later, and she looked at the pile of ice panes on the floor. The information that she actually needed right now would be the later part of Ingrid's story. The older information would be merely things that she and her family would want to know. With that thought, she carefully checked the dates and took two of the later ones instead. These would hopefully have the information she needed on them.

"Gerda, get Anna. Please," Elsa said awhile later. Her blue eyes were bright with excitement now; the secret story behind the present-day mystery was even more complicated than she'd thought, although she wasn't surprised. She had new information that would help! She knew why no one had known about Ingrid! Why no one had taught her about her ancestor when she was little. Why her own daddy had probably been scared of dealing with her when she was small. _Papa couldn't have known all this, but the bit he did know was enough to spook him…_ Somehow it helped her understand why her parents had treated her the way they did. Why they hadn't taken her back to the trolls after the accident for help. Why Arendelle was 'stuck in the past' and had had no contact with a country that was merely across Lake Erie.

Gerda hesitated, not wanting to leave Elsa alone. While Elsa's hands were fine, Gerda knew Elsa was still tired and in pain, whether she would admit it or not. She needed someone to stay with her considering all the present goings-on. Gerda was _not_ going to make the mistake of leaving an injured Elsa alone again, like she had during the whole Jade incident. With their luck, some bad person would get in through the window or something, just because. "Miss Elsa, I can't leave you alone…" she said slowly.

Elsa was unfazed, although she recognized Gerda's look only too well. It was the one that said Gerda did not care what position Elsa had; she was _not_ going to risk Elsa being hurt. She swung her legs off the bed and tried to pull herself to her feet. _What did I do with that stupid brace? I can't walk without it…_ "I need…help, then," she said as firmly as she could.

"Miss Elsa…" Gerda thought for a moment before simply picking Elsa up. If Elsa was going to refuse to stay in bed, fine. She still wasn't going to let Elsa get up by herself. So there. Gerda smiled a bit at Elsa's expression; she hadn't really made a face since it hurt her to do that, but her eyes were clearly a bit annoyed. She did _not_ look scared anymore.

Elsa wasn't particularly happy with the idea of Gerda carrying her, but she didn't protest. What she did _not_ like was the idea of being carried somewhere and not having her brace. What if Gerda had to put her down? She was tired, and her air currents didn't work as well when she was tired. She wouldn't be able to walk or anything by herself. _Elsa, quit freaking yourself out. Gerda will put it back on you if you ask her to._ Elsa looked up at Gerda and pointed at her bad leg. "Please…put…back on?" she asked hopefully. _Good grief, Elsa, stop talking. You're hurting yourself and you sound stupid._

Gerda easily understood what Elsa wanted and quickly obliged her request. "I am still carrying you, Miss Elsa. You shouldn't be out of bed at all," she said firmly. "Here, hold the diary ice pane with the information we all need at the moment and just relax. You try to do way too much too soon. I will go find Anna for you." Gerda gently draped a light blanket around Elsa before picking her up again and heading out into the hallway.

 **A/N: This chapter was nearly twice as long originally, so I had to split it in two.:P More coming ASAP. :)**

 **So Linnae's warning was helpful! And Elsa has discovered she can stop a bomb from going off if she has enough time to do so. (Remember, her ice can be _impenetrable_. Theoretically, this means a bomb can go off inside a bubble and cause no damage. This time she didn't have enough time to do it since she didn't entirely know what she was doing or how the thing worked.) She calls it an "explosive" since her country's military doesn't have what we would call an actual bomb. :P**

 **And now there's more hints about the "mystery". There will be a LOT more info about some lost history things for Elsa and her family coming up in the next chapter. And a bit more about what exactly the trolls can do!**

 **Yes, Elsa's magic is quite literally a recessive gene that runs in her family. This is why she cannot lose her powers, and also why Pabbie meddling with Ingrid's child (Eystein) didn't help. Can you imagine erasing genes in a live human today? It'd probably seriously damage them, if not kill them, I would guess. Since this is magic, obviously I've made up my own rules, but still. :)**

 **If anyone is wondering, Anna can have babies in the future if she chooses, just not Elsa (because Anna is merely a magic carrier and that's it, although she can _sense_ her family's ice magic). I'll try to explain this more later, but I'll give a hint-Corona and Arendelle are linked and Agdar and Idun marrying made their children's chances of having ice magic higher. (No, they're NOT related-that'd be creepy! But their bloodlines WERE related long time ago.)**

 **Next chapter coming soon!:)**


	29. Chapter 29

**A/N: Thanks to everyone who's followed/favorited and/or is reading but not reviewing:)**

 **Olivia O'Neil-Thank you:) There's a bit more in this chapter:)**

 **Elsa and Ingrid-Yes, I am quite serious.:) There is no time traveling. Eystein did not have ice powers.**

 **FluffyKitten-Yep, Elsa can stop a bomb.:) True, she didn't do it perfectly, but that's not believable.:P Rapunzel is coming back, and yes, she's the Arendelle girls' cousin. (Friends and trading partners too!:)) Lol, that's right, you don't want to mess with an angry Anna. XD Anna and Kristoff COULD have a baby with ice powers, but it'd be very very very very unlikely. Even if Elsa could have a baby (which she can't), it's not guaranteed that her child would have magic. I understand that real genetics doesn't work 100% like that, but it's magic, so...meh. Whatever. Suffice it to say it's rare, but there ARE other magic-wielders out there! Not ice ones, but others. Glad you like the mystery! :)**

 **Elsa Tomago-Okay...I figure that even though Gerda is a grownup, she's not going to do the right thing every time. She was nervous herself and instinctively got Anna, that's all.:P No actual logic there. Now when Elsa was brought home, Gerda didn't go get Anna immediately because she knew Anna would just get in the way of getting Elsa help ASAP. :P**

 **IndyGirl-There's a bit more about Ingrid in this chapter. :)**

 **Dear Elsa letter-I will try to get another chapter up tomorrow. No promises, but I'll try. :)**

 **dodgers girl-Yeah, there probably would be some kind of air pressure issues, but they were lower in the sky by that point and...yeah. And it involved Elsa's magic so I figured there'd be an exception. I should probably go back and make all the characters' ears pop or something... I PMed you:)**

 **Mukidi-I'll have to get used to typing your new username, lol.:) Yep, Elsa kicked butt! The US president is an OC in my mind.:P Nope, you're right-that IS the way real genes would work, but this is magic, so it's not that simple (even less likely for the magic trait to come through than a regular recessive one). It's very, very unlikely that Anna's kid(s) would have ice powers, but it is possible, however remote. As far as Elsa is concerned, even if she could have a baby, there's not a guarantee that her child would have her magic, although it'd be far, far, FAR more likely in that case! :)**

 **On to the story!**

Elsa's blue eyes flitted to her ice-elevator when Gerda came to the top of the stairs. While she couldn't literally see through her own ice and she heard nothing, she sensed that there was something amiss with the machine contraption thing she had made. _Someone is stuck in there, and I know everyone in the castle knows it won't work correctly unless I'm doing the buttons. Who would have tried to use it without-_ "Gerda, put me down," she whispered, realization dawning on her. Someone bad was in there. While Elsa knew she certainly wasn't at full power with her magic, she also knew she could protect Gerda if need be. She was _not_ going to have Gerda risk her safety just because of her.

Gerda frowned. "I most certainly will not. Miss Elsa, you can't take care of anything else crazy by yourself today." She marched right up to the ice-elevator and pressed Elsa's hand to the button before Elsa knew what was happening. To be fair, Gerda didn't know what Elsa was all in a tizzy over; she just knew that look in Elsa's eyes, the one that said Elsa didn't care what happened to herself as long as she protected whoever was with her.

 _Gerda, why did you do that?!_ Elsa was greatly perturbed once she realized what Gerda had done, and she jerked herself out of Gerda's arms as the ice-elevator's door slid open. Elsa got to her feet just in time to see someone pointing a gun not at her, but at Gerda next to her. _What? You're supposed to be one of that president's bodyguards, and…you aren't, that's what. What is going on?_

"You are a meddlesome creature, albeit a smart one. I know you've figured out what we want, but I also know you'll never help us voluntarily. So-"

 _Elsa, do something! Do something while he's preoccupied talking!_ Elsa's 'battle' instincts still weren't perfect, but from previous experience, she did know standing around waiting to hear what your opponent was blathering about was stupid. _You have non-lethal offenses at your disposal, Elsa. Do something._ An instant later, ice pinned the man against the wall.

Gerda screamed. Everything seemed to be in slow motion. The gun went off. Elsa flung herself in front of Gerda a split second before a wall of ice shot up in front of both of them. The traitorous "bodyguard" began cussing once he realized his plan had failed. Elsa stumbled backwards clutching her arm. Gerda instinctively caught her and held her close. "Oh, Elsa, Elsa, _why_?" she muttered, not even realizing she'd forgotten the usual title she called Elsa by. _Elsa knew there was someone bad in her ice-elevator. I don't know how she knew, but she did. Why didn't I just listen to her? She probably could have caught that man more off-guard than she did and stopped him without any trouble at all._

Elsa didn't care that Gerda was calling her by just her name; she honestly would rather Gerda did that anyways. She could feel herself nearly shaking in shock at what had almost happened. If she hadn't reacted quickly enough, her surrogate mommy could have been badly hurt because of her. If she had gotten scared and freaked out again, Gerda would be hurt and she herself would probably be being carried off somewhere awful. Only peripherally did Elsa realize her arm was injured. She felt like everything was spinning somehow, which made no sense. "It's bleeding all over and it's making a mess on the carpet," she heard herself say, as if it were someone else saying it. "I don't like those nasty words you're saying. Be quiet," she heard herself say to the cussing man pinned to the wall with ice. Elsa finally just collapsed in Gerda's arms.

Gerda felt tears burning in her eyes as she carefully laid Elsa down on the carpet. She trusted that Elsa had sufficiently taken care of the danger, but that didn't help Elsa herself. _Elsa let herself be shot to protect me. She put herself in the line of fire just in case she didn't use her magic quickly enough. Her ice wall must have gone up hundredths of a second too slow._ Gerda glanced up at the hallway wall at roughly the height where Elsa's arm would have been. There was a bullet lodged in the wall. Thank goodness it wasn't lodged in poor Elsa's arm instead.

Just then Anna came running up from downstairs. "I heard screaming and I thought-" She saw Elsa lying on the carpet and Gerda next to her and the ice wall and the angry man pinned to the wall and instantly put the pieces together. She marched up to the man, punched him as hard as she could, and then stalked over to Gerda and Elsa without a word. That wasn't nearly enough punishment in her mind, but Elsa was more important right now. "Gerda, is Elsa…all right? Well, I mean as all right as she can be?" Anna thought for a moment before taking her petticoat off from beneath her dress and using that to wrap up her sister's arm. Elsa would probably be upset with her later for that, but too bad.

"Don't move her arm too much," Gerda said quietly, her voice sounding a bit strained. "I have no idea how bad it is, to be honest, although I think she'll be all right."

Anna slowly and carefully scooped Elsa up and just held her close. Elsa's naturally cool skin felt clammy, and that scared Anna. "Go fetch somebody to stick that creep in the dungeon, please, Gerda. And get the…the mess cleaned up, too." The thought of Elsa's blood, which was supposed to be _inside_ her sweet big sister, _not_ out of her, made Anna shudder. "I'm gonna take Elsa downstairs to the infirmary. Again. I…I don't want her out of my sight right now." _Elsa, please be all right. I told Kristoff to go to the trolls to get a power crystal so he can go get Rapunzel, but that's going to take several hours. You have to be ok. You just have to._

"Anna?" Elsa just blinked in confusion. How had she gotten in Anna's arms? She'd kept Gerda safe, then Gerda caught her to keep her from falling, and…then what? "My arm is hurt," she heard herself say matter-of-factly.

"No kidding," Anna muttered. "Elsa, what were you _thinking?!_ You're supposed to be in bed, you stubborn thing! Bad Elsa. Very bad," she went on, half to herself and half to Elsa. Anna frowned when Elsa suddenly made the air around her deathly cold before it reverted back to normal and then proceeded to smile at Anna, clearly pleased with herself. _She wouldn't-couldn't-smile earlier because it was hurting her too much. What did she do…?_ "Elsa, what did you just do?"

Elsa knew she wouldn't be able to verbally explain what she had just done; she'd suddenly remembered how she had numbed that spider bite awhile ago with her magic and decided to do it now with her burns and whatever was wrong with her arm. The trouble was that while those things didn't hurt her anymore, at least not beyond a slight pins and needles feeling, she also couldn't move those things very well either. Right now it was more important to her to get rid of the pain than be able to talk clearly and use an arm that she knew wouldn't work right at the moment anyway. _How can I tell Anna what I did?_

Anna frown grew deeper when Elsa didn't reply. She knew Elsa wasn't ignoring her; she could tell the older girl was trying to think about something and was definitely paying attention to her. _Elsa doesn't seem upset, either. Maybe she did something to help herself feel better and doesn't know how to explain it?_ "Did you do something with your magic to help it not hurt so bad, maybe?" That seemed reasonable; it explained both Elsa's smile and why she had suddenly relaxed and stopped trying to hold her arm.

Elsa's blue eyes brightened as she gave her little sister a thumbs up. _Yes, that's exactly right, Anna! I didn't have to explain anything at all._

* * *

Soon Anna was trudging back upstairs again holding Elsa protectively in her arms. Elsa kept her head resting against her little sister's shoulder, but she was completely alert. She had been very, very glad she'd remembered she could numb herself with her magic if she chose, because Dr. Raske had wanted to put her to sleep so he could work on her arm, and if she had let him do that, then she probably would have been out of it the rest of the day. This way, she could share that information with Anna _right now._ Then she could rest, and Anna could go talk to that president, and Rapunzel would be there sometime soon and everything would be fine. Elsa honestly felt quite content at the moment.

Anna, on the other hand, still felt upset. While Anna was happy Elsa didn't seem frightened or upset in any way, she was worried about her all the same. Dr. Raske had said if Rapunzel _didn't_ heal Elsa's arm, it most likely would never be back to normal. Anna didn't quite understand why, but evidently that bullet had nicked something inside her sister's arm and messed it up, even though it wasn't lodged inside and had mostly 'just' grazed her. (Elsa had undone her numbing magic for her burns for a moment and teased Anna for being creeped out, too, which had subsequently made Anna turn bright red…which gave that crazy Elsa a reason to say that Anna looked burnt too and they matched.) _Elsa, you're ridiculous. Only you would have said that._ Now Anna just smiled as she carefully put Elsa down on her bed. "Elsa, I…I'm glad you made those horrible jokes, even if I hated them. 'Cause it means I know you're all right."

Elsa's blue eyes just looked puzzled.

"In here, Elsa," Anna said quietly, pointing at her heart. "You weren't making those stupid jokes for my benefit-you were _teasing_ me. You were genuinely amused with yourself for saying them, too. You didn't feel all sad and hurting and broken inside anymore-I could tell."

Elsa's shoulders slumped, and she looked away from Anna, unable to meet her eyes. _I do feel_ better _inside, but I…I'm not completely okay, either. What if I disappoint Anna somehow and I fall apart again? What if she thinks I'm all better? Wait…Anna knows that I'm not completely okay. Of course she does. She's just happy I could actually tease her and say silly things and not be crying or panicking or whatever. And she's right-I_ am _getting better._

 _Good grief, Elsa, why don't you just shut up? You're nothing but a-_

Anna's sharp but clearly concerned voice cut through Elsa's thoughts. "Elsa, stop thinking whatever it is you're thinking," she ordered. "Look at me. Elsa. Please look at me. I need to tell you something."

Elsa didn't do what Anna asked, but she scooted close to her little sister and hid her face in her shoulder. Anna loved her just like she was, whether she was damaged inside or not. Anna was not going to get rid of her just because part of her felt broken inside and she couldn't make herself feel better on her own sometimes. So there. That nasty critical internal voice was _not_ going to hurt her right now. She had Anna with her and she was _not_ worthless. _Just not nearly as valuable as Anna, that's all,_ Elsa thought to herself. She sighed contentedly and just stayed put.

"You're ok now, Elsa." It wasn't a question; Anna could just tell. She was so grateful that she could read Elsa fairly easily.

Elsa nodded as Anna tucked her under the covers. _Yes, I'm okay. Now I just need to share that information with Anna and everything should be fine._

* * *

Gerda knocked on Elsa's door not five minutes later with Ingrid's ice pane diary piece in hand. "I believe this is what you wanted to show your sister, Miss Elsa."

Elsa nodded and watched expectantly while Anna read it. Because Elsa had already 'unlocked' the hidden words with her magic before, Anna could read it by herself without Elsa's help.

Anna's eyes grew big as she read. It sounded like something out of a mystery book to her. Hidden messages from over a century ago inside a column on a building in a country's capital, a city that she had briefly seen _once_? Awesome! "Elsa…are you telling me there's a century-and-a-half-year-old link between our country and the United States? It sounds so crazy, but it kinda makes sense, too! And…and Ingrid asked the trolls to erase _millions_ of people's memories about both her and the two countries' relations to salvage a giant mess she had caused? Put some kind of cloaking magic thing over Arendelle and Corona and Weselton and the Southern Isles and stuff so Arendelle could still survive despite what she had done?"

Elsa slowly nodded, her own eyes shining in excitement. She couldn't wait until she could actually really _discuss_ the whole thing with Anna. She just hoped the United States president would believe her when she explained it. It sounded crazy even to her, and she was used to the idea of magic.

"And this means _you_ began unlocking all that stuff the moment you were born, Elsa! _You_ are the 'next ice mage' Ingrid mentions! Oh boy, this is so awesome!" Anna was nearly bouncing on her toes now. " _You_ woke the trolls up from their years and years long sleep from using so much magic like they did for Ingrid. Just 'cause you're you, Elsa! That is so cool!"

Elsa began giggling as she watched Anna continue reading. Anna was pacing back and forth, eagerly reading aloud. _I'm going to pay Grand Pabbie a visit the second I'm better._

* * *

"I wanna play with Elsa," Anikka begged as she watched Gerda and Nikoleta fixing dinner that evening in the kitchen. Eliot and Kiara sat at the kitchen table next to her. "I want her t' take me swimming!"

"She is in bed, hopefully resting with the princess watching her. Miss Elsa will be fine, but she's hurt. She cannot take you swimming," Gerda told the little girl firmly. Quite honestly, Gerda would have let Anikka go upstairs to see Elsa, but she was worried Elsa might actually try to exert herself if Anikka wanted to play with her. Anikka always wanted a piggyback ride from the older girl, and there was no way Gerda was risking Elsa trying to do that.

"Elsa hurt bad?" Now Anikka's voice sounded worried. She hopped up and ran over to the oven; then screamed when she touched it and it felt too hot.

Gerda asked Nikoleta to watch the things on the stove before kneeling in front of the scared child and looked at her fingers. They looked bright red, but not too bad. _Thank goodness she's all right. I wouldn't want to tell Elsa we didn't manage to keep her little charge safe for her._ "Anikka, do _not_ touch the oven or the stove. You know better than that," she said sternly. "And Miss Elsa will be fine, but she's hurt pretty badly right now," Gerda added quietly.

Anikka's little face puckered up and she began crying. " _I want Elsa!_ Elsa need feel-better hugs!" she shouted.

"Elsa needs t' sleep…if she's…hurt," Eliot said. "Hugs…'ight wake her…up."

"Shush! I want to give Elsa a hug," Anikka said stubbornly, crossing her arms. "I want to give Elsa a hug _now_." The little girl's words were very clear, correct grammar, complete sentences and all. In her mind, nobody had any right to tell her she couldn't go see Elsa. Elsa was _her_ adoptive mommy, not anyone else's. So there. "Elsa _mine_!"

Eliot scowled. "Not yours. Human," he informed the younger child. _Elsa doesn't belong to Anikka. So there._ To Eliot, nobody had any right to say something like that. Elsa was her own person, not anyone else's. He had loved having someone else near his own age to play with at first, but originally shy and sad Anikka was very bossy sometimes. And _very_ possessive of Elsa.

"For someone who doesn't talk right, you sure say a lot in three words," Kiara said bluntly. "I agree with Eliot, Anikka. I won't be so nice about how to say it, either. You are being possessive and obnoxious and it's stupid," she commented.

Eliot thought for a moment and then frowned, unsure whether Kiara's comment was a compliment or an insult. Probably both, considering who had said it. Since he didn't know, he decided not to say anything else at all.

Gerda glanced at the two little kids and the older one and just shook her head. "What if I let all of you go see Miss Elsa, if my very capable helper Miss Niko is willing to watch you?"

Nikoleta blushed at that. _Gerda thinks I'm capable? She's actually asking if I'm willing to watch them?_

* * *

Soon Nikoleta was in front of Elsa's door with Kiara, Eliot, and Anikka right behind her. "Hopefully Elsa's actually asleep, so we have to be super quiet," she whispered before tapping on the door lightly.

The door opened almost instantly after a bit of rustling to reveal a scowling Anna wielding a sharp letter opener as a makeshift weapon. Anna began rambling in relief. "I, well, um…I thought it was another weird creepy person and I thought I'd poke him in the eye with this and Elsa's desk was neat but I sort of knocked some papers off and-" Anna whirled around when she heard quiet, tired giggles behind her. "Elsa, you be quiet! It's not _that_ funny, and you're s'posed to be sleeping."

Elsa's eyes clearly said that yes, it was too that funny, but she didn't try to say anything.

Anna decided she would dunk Elsa in the pool sometime when she wasn't expecting it once she was better. "Well, you guys can come in, but Elsa's SUPPOSED to be going to sleep, coughcough, not giggling at me rambling like a dumdum, coughcough," she said. Honestly, she was enjoying her time with Elsa very much despite the fact that Elsa couldn't really talk at the moment. Somehow she could still mostly understand everything Elsa wanted to express-not _everything_ , but mostly. And Elsa had let her fix her hair, too, which Anna thought was lots of fun, although Elsa had quickly grown tired of that and let Anna convince her to just leave it loose. Anna still thought her big sister's hair was awfully pretty and didn't understand why Elsa didn't like it.

"Anikka wanted to give you a hug, Elsa," Nikoleta said hesitantly. "And we wanted to see if you were ok, too. Are you…are you all right?"

Elsa nodded as Anikka eagerly hopped up on the bed next to her. She immediately put her good arm around the little girl and held her close. _I'm okay. And…and they all came up here just to see if I was all right? Don't they have better things to do than bother with me?_ Her blue eyes were suddenly very confused. She didn't understand why they would all come check on her. Wouldn't they be glad to not have to bother with her for awhile instead? _For that matter, why's_ Anna _staying with me? I already shared that information with her, so I'm not useful anymore…not right now._

"Elsa, they're your friends. They care about you," Anna told her gently. "We all _love_ you. And…and you aren't a bother, either. Can you…can you at least just try to accept that? There are five people in this room that don't think that. Only _one,_ maybe two, people ever thought those mean things about you, and they're wrong." _Elsa, please believe me…you start thinking like that way too easily…_ She could tell Elsa wasn't relaxing; she had just closed her eyes and seemed all tense again, like she might cry. "Just relax, you little stinker," Anna added in a very quiet voice as she carefully helped her sister sit up and then subtly nodded at the others. She remembered Olaf telling her attacking Elsa with hugs would be a good idea, and now she would do just that. So there.

A minute later Elsa felt herself being hugged from all sides. This was sort of nerve-inducing for a girl who wasn't used to such things (not from so many people at once, anyways!), and she instinctively curled up in a ball holding her injured arm protectively close. _I'm glad nobody's mad at me or anything, but I don't like this. It's too much. I feel all trapped and nervous and…and suffocated. Please stop hugging me. Please? Just_ one, _or maybe two, people at once? Pretty please? I love hugs, but this is too much for me. I'm sorry…what if I mess up again? I don't want to hurt you._ Then she felt terrible for thinking that because at least her friends _wanted_ to give her hugs, but she still couldn't help feeling nervous all the same.

Anna felt a shaky cold hand squeeze her arm and she abruptly realized what was going on. _Elsa's scared. Of course she doesn't want all of us hugging her at once. It makes her nervous._ "Um, you guys…I think maybe Elsa doesn't want all of us squishing her at once," she said quickly. _Why didn't I think of that?! I was trying to make her feel better, and I just scared her instead…_

Elsa remained looking down and curled up even after everyone let go of her; she could feel herself still shaking a little bit, and this made her disappointed with herself. _I_ know _I won't hurt them. And I know they won't hurt me, either. Get yourself together, Elsa. You are being ridiculous. You are supposed to know how to control your magic now, and you are_ not _supposed to be scared of your friends' hugs!_

"Elsa, we understand," Nikoleta assured her friend quickly. "We'll leave and let you rest now. Just…just _get better_. We all need you." _I don't feel safe with Elsa out of commission, to be honest…_

Anna held Elsa protectively until she was sure Elsa had fallen asleep. Then she carefully tucked her back under the covers. She was glad and very relieved to see that Elsa seemed contented and mostly relaxed now…aside from the fact that Elsa had been clutching Anna's sleeve tightly with her good hand and wouldn't let go. Anna had to gently unclasp Elsa's fist to get her to let go, which made Elsa make an upset noise and subconsciously move closer to Anna. "Elsa, I don't mind staying with you, but you're _safe_ ," Anna stressed quietly. While Anna was happy Elsa didn't object to being touched or held anymore, she hated how the older girl actually seemed worried and upset about being left alone. If Elsa reacted like that when she was asleep, then she probably felt like that when she was awake too, just not as much.

Anna decided she would start paying even closer attention to Elsa's reactions to certain things. And she was going to think of something extra good to do for Elsa's birthday.

* * *

Late that night, Anna gently shook her sister awake after Rapunzel had healed her. _Elsa must have been more tired than she let on if Rapunzel's singing didn't wake her up…_ "Rapunzel, I'm so sorry for bugging you again," Anna told her cousin. "But thank you _so_ much for coming."

Elsa beamed as she sat up and rubbed her eyes sleepily. Then she realized something that terrified her. "Rapunzel, who saw you come in?" she whispered.

Kristoff frowned. "Nobody saw either of us come back, Elsa. I brought her directly here with that power crystal. Why?"

"Because…" Elsa's frightened eyes darted to her half-closed door. Swiftly she climbed out of bed, 'flew' to her door and shut it; then iced it shut, along with her window. She turned back to her cousin and looked her straight in the face. "I appreciate what you did for me so much, but you need to undo it."

Rapunzel merely stared at her. " _Undo_ it?! Elsa, are you crazy? Not only do I not know how or even if I can, I couldn't possibly do that to you! That would be really cruel, and you know it."

Elsa shook her head. "No, I…you probably know the general idea of what's going on; I'm sure Kristoff and Anna filled you in. But those same bad people that want _my_ powers-they'll want yours, too. Even the people that genuinely want me for good reasons…they'll want to do tests on you, too. But none of them know you exist. I can't have you or Corona put in danger. If I show up in the morning perfectly fine, they are all going to know there's someone else with magic, too. I just…I just don't want to risk your safety on account of me." She yanked the magic book from the trolls out from under her pillows and found the section that would apply to Rapunzel's magic. "Here. I-I'm sorry I didn't think of it before I bothered you."

"Elsa, I do understand what you mean, I really do. But I can't do that to you," Rapunzel said quietly but firmly. "I _won't_ do that to you," she added, handing the book back to Elsa.

"Maybe you could just let them think your powers extend to super-fast healing capabilities too?" Anna suggested.

Kristoff shook his head. "She can't do that. Should something go wrong-should she get stuck in a situation where somebody's trying to run tests on her-they could end up killing her because they'll just think she's refusing to do anything to heal herself when she genuinely can't." He thought for a minute, trying to come up with another solution. Elsa couldn't let herself stay in the condition she'd been in before Rapunzel had healed her; they all needed her to be able to conduct business and fight if necessary. Yet he understood Elsa's worry about putting her cousin in danger, too. "Why not undo what you did but heal the worst of it?" Kristoff suggested finally. "Make it so she just looks like she's sunburned or something? Good grief, I don't know. That probably won't work, either…"

Anna scowled and snatched the magic book from Elsa. "I say let's leave Elsa healed!" she whisper-screamed fiercely. "Rapunzel, _please_ don't listen to Elsa. She didn't tell you her arm wouldn't have healed back to normal if you hadn't fixed it for her. And those burns would end up giving her scars, too. Let's leave it a mystery and not explain it at all."

Rapunzel and Kristoff both nodded, but Elsa stayed quiet. She bit her lip as she looked down at her hands. This should be _her_ decision, shouldn't it? They weren't giving her a chance to speak up at all. She wanted to speak up for herself this time. "It…it's my decision!" she blurted. Then just as quickly, she shook her head and backed away. _Elsa, who do you think you are? You can't even think right sometimes, like every time you get upset._ "I'm sorry, I'll be quiet, I-" _Shut up, Elsa. Now you're just making yourself sound stupid._

"Elsa's right. It _is_ her decision," Kristoff pointed out. "We're sorry, Elsa. We just wanted to help. You just kind of have a horrible track record of never considering the consequences to yourself when you do things, that's all."

Elsa's cheeks turned pink. "I didn't want to order any of you to do anything. I just wanted input too because…'cause no one was giving me a chance to say anything. I guess I take too long mulling things over, trying to figure out what to say."

"You're just quieter than Anna and me in general," Rapunzel told her, giving Elsa's hand a gentle squeeze. "We'll shut up for now. I want to hear what you have to say." She paused for a second before adding with a grin, "And your hair looks really pretty loose like that. And dramatic."

This just made Elsa uncomfortable, and she blushed even more. "Rapunzel, I've seen what it looks like. It's just…there. Not ugly and not awesome, either. But thank you all the same." She bit her lip as she thought about the options for the actual important discussion at hand. The issue with Rapunzel healing her was that she didn't want to risk her cousin's safety. If she let it just be a mystery and refused to explain, that might get her in trouble, but it would at least let Rapunzel off the hook. That was good enough for her. "I think we should let it be a mystery, like you all suggested we should. But Rapunzel, you _have_ to go home. Immediately. It's not that I don't want you here-I just…I just want to make sure you're safe."

"But I've barely gotten to talk to you and Anna at all!" Rapunzel exclaimed in disappointment. (Both her cousins immediately shushed her.) "Sorry. It's just that I feel like I never get to see you unless something crazy's going on, that's all. I want to get to know my cousins better." She kicked her shoes off as she added, "I still don't like shoes. They're so…constricting. Barefoot is much better." Then a second later, she smiled and flung herself into the comfy chair in the corner of Elsa's room. "I think I will just stay here, Elsa. I told my parents I'd be gone for a week. And Eugene is right outside your window, too. Kristoff can't take us back anyway. That weird crystal has to recharge. You could just hide us, Elsa. Freeze us in here so nobody can get in."

Elsa scowled. "You all tricked me," she muttered in annoyance. _They were intending to stay no matter what I said…_ She went over to her window and peeked outside. Sure enough, there was Eugene Fitzherbert standing right below her window. Without considering it further, she unfroze the window and stuck her hand outside, creating an air current that picked a very startled Eugene up and dropped him in the floor inside. "What are you _thinking_?! Don't you realize you just put yourselves in a great deal of danger?"

"Nice trick, Miss Icy," was Eugene's immediate comment. He smirked at her as he brushed invisible dust off his pants. "I live for danger. Maybe Blondie and I can help you."

Elsa threw up her hands in frustration…which sent snowflakes cascading all over the room. A sudden knock that she didn't recognize sounded on her door, and she figuratively froze. "I need to go for a moment. All of you stay here. And for goodness sakes, _be quiet_!" she whispered. Elsa hated to boss the others around, but now she was almost angry. She was very grateful that Rapunzel had healed her, but she was not happy with what Kristoff had let Eugene and Rapunzel talk him into. And knowing Anna, she had probably been in on it too. Elsa grabbed her original ice-dress from her closet and slipped into her bathroom to change clothes and braid her hair. Then she went out into the hallway without a word, making sure her entire room was sealed so Anna, Kristoff, Rapunzel, and Eugene couldn't get out and nobody could get in. _I hate the idea of trapping them in there like I was for so long, but I don't know what else to do. I just don't. I'm sorry._

* * *

Out in the hall, Elsa was startled to see the U.S. president standing in front of her with a clearly displeased Gerda right next to him. "It's rather late to be paying people visits, wouldn't you say?" she deadpanned, unsure what to say that would actually be useful.

The president merely stared at her speechless, stunned into silence. There was no trace of any sort of burns on her at all anymore, or any sign that her arm had been hurt just earlier that day. What had happened? "You…heal…miraculously quickly," he said finally. Maybe her weird abilities let her heal strangely fast or something.

Elsa said nothing. _Just drop the topic. Please drop the topic,_ she thought hopefully.

"Well, I came to simply thank you for exposing a traitor that could have ended up assassinating me or another loyal citizen, and see how you were doing. You put yourself in danger to save someone who was nothing to you. I'm sure that means you would be only too eager to help with those test experiments." It was not a question. It sounded like he expected her to instantly agree. This had quickly turned from a thank-you comment and checking on an injured potential ally, to someone expecting her to be stupid enough to be flattered into agreeing to something too quickly. She had to be careful.

 _Elsa, that makes you sound way too soft-hearted. You have brains. Use them._ Elsa could almost hear her father talking to her. He would never let someone think he was a pushover…or overly benevolent, just enough that he wasn't some cruel dictator or something. He would tell her to stand her ground and, if someone thought of her like that, to fix it immediately as best she could. "That traitor wanted me for the same reason you do, sir," she said carefully. "While I am not sure what I think of your test-experiment ideas, I do know you and that traitor and others like him are not the same. You may not have my or my country's best interests at heart, but you are not a bad person. You just want to help your country. I can tell."

"So you're willing to help?" he pressed.

"I did not say whether I would or would not. I need more information first. My first duty is to my country. Surely you can understand that." Elsa stood up straight, her shoulders back, her eyes looking straight at her foreign guest's. She knew he wasn't taking her seriously-she could tell. He thought she was a kindhearted little girl in over her head. Innocent, but easily manipulated. This made her angry. _Probably a little girl_ alien _,_ she thought in annoyance, thinking about what Anna had told her earlier. _At least he doesn't think I'm a bad person, right?_

 _Elsa, what about simple human rights? He has no right to make you a…an experiment or a test specimen. You're a human girl, too. Bring that up._

 _But I'm not…not normal…I'm messed up._

 _Doesn't matter. Say something anyway._ "Whatever you want me for, I _am_ a human, just like you or my sister or anyone else. I might be d-different on the outside, but I have rights too." Elsa inwardly winced at her slight stumble over 'different', although she managed to keep her expression unreadable. She still couldn't defend herself very well verbally, and she knew that only too well.

The president looked Elsa right in the face; he could tell she didn't genuinely believe what she'd just said, not from her expression, which was impeccably stoic, but the tone of voice she had just used. _She's frightened of being hurt. But that doesn't make sense. Why would she voluntarily come 'save the day' earlier then? So that can't be it. What could she possibly be scared of? She could freeze someone solid if she chose; she can create life! How can she be scared?!_ "Queen Elsa, I have no desire to hurt you in any way," he said firmly. "I admit I am not entirely convinced you're 'just a human girl', but you are most definitely intelligent and of course you have rights. You have more rights than anyone here-I am on foreign soil and this is your home. You could refuse my request entirely if you choose, although I hope you won't do that. What would be your immediate caveats to the proposition?"

This Elsa answered immediately without pausing. "The experiments take place here. I am to know _everything_ about what you are wanting to do to or with me before anything happens, and also exactly what you are going to do with said information. If I don't like something, I don't have to go along with it. And finally," now Elsa's pale cheeks turned a bit pink, "I'd like to know what your scientists find out about me. I _know_ I'm just a human girl like anyone else; I know my magic is from a recessive gene of some kind, but…I don't know. I don't know very much about me o-or how I work." _Elsa, you shouldn't have said that. You made yourself sound ignorant and vulnerable._

"Queen Elsa loves science-related things," Gerda said quickly. "If you could focus more on the physics-related aspect of how her powers work, perhaps that would be better than trying to perform potentially…not-nice tests on her. Also, I think your doctors could take a look at Miss Elsa's leg if she is going to go to the trouble of helping you. And don't underestimate her. She might look like she's just a sweet little girl, but there's a powerful but kind ice mage queen inside her. So don't make her angry." Gerda knew Elsa was feeling uncomfortable; she also knew Elsa knew she'd said things that weren't entirely flattering. Elsa wasn't good at talking herself up, and that was what she needed right now.

The president looked from Elsa to Gerda and back again. _This girl wants to help, but she is not stupid. Just…too nice for her own good. But she's not going to budge on her position of putting her country first. That's understandable and admirable. Good for her._ He had honestly expected to find someone willingly give up their position, or run off and throw a fit or something. Elsa was not at all what he expected. He suddenly felt a sort of fatherly respect for her. Here was a young girl, who by all intents and purposes, was basically from a whole other world, and she was not cowed by all the new things she had seen; nor was she naïve or stupid, either. "Perhaps we could come to an agreement. You help the United States, but if it comes down to it, Arendelle comes first. Period. If there is something you feel is not in the best interest of yourself or your country, you merely refuse and that's that."

Elsa sensed a slightly different tone in the man's voice now. A more respectful tone, like he was speaking to an equal rather than a child. Gerda had done it! _Thank you so much, Gerda. You fixed the mess I made,_ she thought gratefully. "That sounds fine, but I should like to have it in writing all the same. With witnesses for both Arendelle and the United States present," she replied. _I should make him help Arendelle somehow too, but I don't want to risk making some alliance now and then Anna or her child or whoever rules after me has to deal with them subtly taking over. Maybe I could have them build us a few modern battleships? I could alter them so they're even better…no, I don't want that._ Then a sudden idea struck her, and she smiled. "In trade for my help, I would like to have a treaty written up in such a way that the United States never, ever attempts to invade or take over Arendelle in any way, even after I am gone. My country is _not_ to be another territory or state for the U.S. We are a sovereign country on our own." There. That wouldn't _ensure_ Arendelle's safety after she was gone, but it would help. "Also," Elsa went on, her eyes sparkling excitedly, "I have some historical information that applies to both of our countries that should explain your question of why you didn't know about Arendelle until last year."

 **A/N: Yes, Elsa should probably make more of a stink about helping a country that's already indirectly caused her trouble, but in her mind, she wants to help others as long as she can make sure her own country is safe.**

 **Next chapter coming soon!**


	30. Chapter 30

**A/N: Thanks to everyone who's followed/favorited and/or is reading but not reviewing.:)**

 **Olivia O'Neil-Thank you! It was fun writing it, lol. There'll be a bit more about the mystery in this chapter.:)**

 **raven678-The reason why Elsa agreed is in this chapter.:) (Don't forget, she's still curious about exactly how "Elsa" works.:P)**

 **Elsa and Ingrid-I'm sorry, but you don't have to forgive me.:P That's okay!**

 **FluffyKitten-He was talking to Elsa and aiming at Gerda since he figured (correctly) that she would be more concerned about Gerda being hurt than herself. Of course, then the guy's plan backfired, but still. Also…Elsa could have simply made an ice bubble around her and Gerda, but again, she's not a fighter at heart and she wanted to immobilize the bad guy, too. So yes, she put herself in the line of fire in case her defenses didn't go up quickly enough.:/ She's only done that little trick twice now.:) Elsa's birthday is in less than a month…and about the hugs…yeah, she still doesn't like too many people close at once, even though she loves hugs.:) Well, yes, Elsa** _ **might**_ **be walking right into trouble (okay, duh, of course she is), but she's being really careful, so it'll be difficult for anyone to trick her.**

 **Elsa Tomago-Thank you:) I did try to make it clearer in that chapter after we were talking via PM. :)**

 **Mukidi-Lol, thanks:P Honestly I probably simplified it too much, but it's a story, and I highly highly doubt anyone wants to read a bunch of political mumbo-jumbo. I wouldn't!:) Thank you for the suggestion-I probably should change the summary, but I'm not sure what to change it to. I'll have think about how to word it.:P No mistakes, and don't apologize!:)**

 **IndyGirl89-Diplomatic Elsa is fun to write, because she's thinking one thing and saying another a lot of the time.:P And yes, the president himself will be reasonable, but the question is what'll happen if Elsa runs into more bad people while she's there. :/**

 **On to the story!**

Elsa took her spur-of-the-moment meeting with the U.S. president to the library. That would be more professional-looking than simply discussing things in the hallway. Besides, she didn't know how long this was going to take, and she knew her legs would get tired if she stayed standing still for ages. That was not what she needed. _I have to look grown-up, competent, and…not stupid? I don't know what to call it, but I can't be shy, tired Elsa that needs hugs so she'll feel better. So there._ "Your country's government sounds ridiculously complicated," Elsa commented now, after hearing about all the rigmarole that would have to be done about certain things.

"It seems that Arendelle's government is _too_ simple. An absolute monarchy risks a tyrant in charge, and that is hardly a good thing. And what happens if there is only a child left next in line, like you were?"

Elsa scowled. "I am not a child, and neither is my sister. My sister is perfectly capable of taking my place should something happen to me. I do concede that my country's government risks a tyrant being in control, but at least I can get things done for Arendelle without consulting a dozen different entity things, each made up of many people, which makes things come to an instant standstill when everyone can't agree on a decision quickly." She paused for a moment, figuring debating different types of government was going to be pointless. Of _course_ anyone would defend their own country's setup. Every type of government would have some sort of flaws anyway. "Perhaps it would be more useful to simply discuss the specifics of the history I had to tell you. I believe you should know all of it whether you decide to uncover the hidden message or not."

"Queen Elsa, I do believe that you honestly think what you've told me is true, but it sounds like something out of a mystery thriller," the president said carefully. "Very _National Treasure_ -esque or something. Even if there _was_ a message hidden in a column of the White House, how would we know which column it is? Or if the message has deteriorated or eaten by bugs, etc?"

Elsa had absolutely no idea what _National Treasure_ was, but she refrained from asking. That was irrelevant, and she didn't need something else that made her look naïve and ignorant. _Elsa, Ingrid drew a rough sketch in her diary and explained exactly where it was. Draw the president a simple blueprint-type sketch._ "Just one moment, please." She stood up and grabbed a sheet of paper off the piano, along with something to write with; and quickly sketched out what she knew of the building in question, adding an arrow to the column where the hidden message was supposed to be. "Does this building look somewhat familiar?" she asked, handing the paper to the president.

The president's eyes nearly bugged out of his head. Elsa's sketch was clearly a bit sloppy and rough, since she'd drawn it in just a minute or two, but the building was clearly recognizable as the White House. She had even drawn the correct number of columns on the South Portico-six. "You have a photograph of the White House?"

"No, sir," Elsa answered truthfully. "The message is hidden in the top of the left middle column. It will not be destroyed or deteriorated-I know it won't. It was put there so…so whatever n-normal person was in charge in your country when the truth came out would actually believe it." Elsa felt herself beginning to clam up again and wanting to run from the room, but she forced herself to meet the president's eyes. _I can't cry or panic. Elsa, keep it together. And don't mess up. You can't._

 _She at least_ believes _she's telling the truth. She is not trying to cause trouble. What could it hurt to simply check? Then, whether this "message" is there or not, everyone will know the truth._ "I will personally check when I return home," he said finally. Elsa's instant relieved smile reassured him that he was doing the right thing, rather than just making him more worried.

Elsa's smile faded a moment later, though. "If you'll pardon my saying so, you _need_ to find all of the other traitors in your government and eliminate them. I don't mean execute them necessarily, but they can't stay where they are. If you had terrorist types in your own bodyguard, I can only imagine how many more there are." She crossed her arms, a risky idea popping into her head. _I can't do that. That isn't my job…_

 _It_ is _your job to help people, though._ Elsa remembered what had happened the December before when she'd been so sick. She had a gift. She wasn't done here yet. _I can help because of my magic? That's not a bad thing! I wouldn't be able to help much if it wasn't for being 'messed up'. I'd just be an ordinary young girl…_

 _And you'd probably lose your country, too. You wouldn't any way to defend Arendelle very well, not without hurting a ton of people, anyways._ Elsa lifted her chin and said, "I can help get rid of those bad people. I'll go undercover and pretend to join them and learn who all of them are, and then tell you who they are. I can defend myself if I need to." _But others come first. If I have to be hurt to keep everyone else safe, that's okay._

"Queen Elsa, I am quite sure you can defend yourself, but I don't…I don't think that will work. You'll still look like…you, even if you're 'in disguise'. That being said, you have a very good idea. I'll just need someone trustworthy to undertake a thing like that…"

Elsa wanted to scream that she could too help, but she refrained from doing so. The president was right. Between her unique platinum hair, her too-pale skin, and her bad leg, there was no way Elsa could ever _really_ be 'in disguise'. She'd end up passing for a little while and then get into trouble. _Ms. Diane! She could help. She knows those organizations and she_ could _successfully be in disguise._ She smiled. "I think I know someone who can help."

* * *

When Elsa finally got back to her room a long while later, she found Eugene and Rapunzel asleep on the carpet wrapped up in the blankets they'd brought, and both Kristoff and Anna sitting up waiting for her. "Elsa, I'm sorry I brought both of 'em back," Kristoff apologized. "They kind of convinced me it was a good idea, and for the record, Anna didn't know anything about it."

Elsa shook her head, but she was smiling. "It turns out everything is just fine. It's safe for them to stay. First, I think those modern people will believe just about anything I say I can do with my magic, even if it's ridiculously stupid. I can't say the same for anything else I say, but…anyways. But Rapunzel can _not_ use her healing magic in front of any of them. Period. I don't want her getting tangled up in this mess too. Second, the U.S. people will be leaving tomorrow afternoon. I will not be going with them, but the president will be contacting me at some point in the near future about those test-experiment things. I did not tell him about how I can talk to Linnae, but he will be arranging to free her and let her come home." Elsa had been tempted to tell the president about how she could 'talk' to Linnae because it would have been helpful to get rid of the bad terrorist people, but then he could use that same information against her if he chose to do so. Her first responsibility was to Arendelle…she could _not_ let her heart make her do anything different. She'd honestly withheld quite a bit of information about her magic, and she would keep it that way when she participated in those experiment things.

Deep in her heart, Elsa knew the main reason she had agreed to participate was her own curiosity. She knew her magic wouldn't help the president's country much unless she was there to actually use it. _That's selfish, Elsa. And kind of jerky._

"You agreed to those stupid test things, Elsa?!" Anna demanded. "Whatever for?! That's…that's just…Elsa, how _could_ you? What if-" Anna scowled, realizing Elsa was trying to say something. "What'd you just say, Elsa?"

"I said 'I wanted to'," Elsa repeated in the same quiet voice. "Maybe I can learn something about how I work. Why I'm… _me_." She was exhausted from being forced to 'hold it together' in front of an important stranger for so long, and she suddenly felt like crying. What if she had said something stupid during that meeting and she didn't even realize it? What if everything was _not_ okay like she thought it was? Elsa swiped at her eyes roughly, not wanting to start crying yet again. She was okay now. She _had_ to be. _Elsa, get yourself together. What's wrong with you?_

Anna kind of wanted to chew Elsa out for agreeing to such nonsense things, but she just wrapped her arms around Elsa and hugged her close instead. _I won't just let Elsa make herself cry again. I got to help her. That's_ my _job._ "Elsa, it's too late now, but you don't need to learn anything about 'how you work'. You're just a regular girl aside from your powers and you know it," she said firmly. "And if you want more information about your powers, you have that book from the trolls you borrowed."

Elsa allowed her sister to lead her over to the bed and make her sit down. She reached for the dolls Anna had given her for her birthday the year before and just held them close. "I don't want magic information, Anna," she said softly. "I'm going to give that book back to the trolls, too. I don't need it, and I don't think I want it anymore, either. Anyways…I want _scientific_ information. Not magic. I want to know why I have blue sparks in my blood, for example. I'd love to compare my 'normal' ice to actual normal ice. Or see just how tough my 'impenetrable' ice is. Does that…does that make sense?"

"Yes," Anna said simply. _I do understand that. Of course she wants to know those things. She basically wants to combine magic with science, which is kind of cool and so totally…Elsa-y._ Anna smiled and gave Elsa a reassuring squeeze. _And I'm glad she decided to do something for herself for once, even if it's kinda…well, I'm not sure if it's a good idea, but still._

Elsa said nothing and just leaned against Anna sleepily, her blue eyes drifting closed. _I'm still wearing my ice-dress-I should put on my nightgown,_ she thought absently, but she didn't move other than to kick her shoes off and unfasten her brace. She was safe in her room with her family. She didn't have to be all poised and grown-up anymore.

Anna frowned. _Elsa isn't kicking Kristoff and Eugene out of her room? I figured she would…she's either just really, really tired or she's decided to trust them. Or both. Probably both. Still…_ "Elsa, d'you want me and the others to leave?" she asked.

"No," came Elsa's mumbled reply. "I…like you…in here, Anna." Then, in a slightly more awake tone, "But Kristoff and Eugene have to stay on the floor if they don't want to go out. And not near you or me. No arguments." She didn't resist when Anna gently pushed her onto the pillows. "G'night, Anna."

"Good night, you stinker," Anna said, trying not to giggle. Sleepy Elsa giving orders was funny. She sighed as Elsa turned over, still clutching her dolls close. Something told her that if Elsa wasn't so tired, she _would_ have made a stink about men being in her room, even if they were her cousin's and sister's 'significant others'. Anna almost wished Elsa _would_ make a stink about it. "Elsa, what time did you get up this morning?" she asked suspiciously. It was after midnight now, and something told her Elsa had probably gotten up before dawn that morning. No wonder she was tired.

Elsa just blinked at Anna for a minute. "Early," she said finally. That was true. She just hadn't said _how_ early.

Anna said nothing, but she hesitated before telling Kristoff to leave and take Eugene with him. " _I_ don't mind you in here, but I know Elsa would make you leave if she was really awake, and I don't wanna take advantage of her," she explained.

Kristoff nodded agreeably, and soon both men were gone, leaving Anna with a very sleepy Rapunzel and Elsa.

"You can come up here," Elsa told her cousin, smiling. "It might be a bit squished, but I don't mind."

* * *

In a minute, all three girls were happily curled up under the covers, Elsa sandwiched in the middle. Elsa didn't particularly care-it made her feel safe and just…cared for. _That's silly, Elsa. You're twenty-one years old, not three._ She was still lecturing herself mentally when Anna asked, "Elsa, d'you think Rapunzel could heal Eliot? It just popped into my head. I mean, she can't fix your leg because it was caused by magic, but Eliot was just born like that, so…"

Elsa bit her lip as she mulled over Anna's newest idea. _That's a nice idea, but what if it didn't work? Then Eliot might be upset, and besides, there's nothing_ wrong _with him anyways. And…_ "There's nothing wrong with Eliot!" she exclaimed finally. "Why does he-or I-need fixing? Not for that, anyways!"

"Well, you succeeded in waking Elsa up," Rapunzel deadpanned to Anna. "And Elsa, I don't think she meant to imply anything bad. She's just trying to help. If there's no need to fix that, why are you trying to fix your leg yourself?"

Elsa's blue eyes immediately filled with tears. "I…I don't know. I just…I just wanted t-to…" _I just wanted to fix it so Papa and Mama and Anna would like me better, mostly. I mean, I don't like dealing with it, but it doesn't bother me much anymore; I don't care that much. It's just…there._

Rapunzel instantly felt horrible. She hadn't meant to make Elsa upset; she'd just been trying to point out something she had noticed. "Elsa, I'm sorry. I don't think you need 'fixing' at all, really. As long as you don't care about it, I won't care, either. Cross my heart," she said firmly.

"She still thinks fixing her leg will make me and our parents like her better," Anna muttered, knowing it was true. "She says otherwise, but it's…yeah." Anna turned her attention to Elsa's tear-streaked face. "Elsa, that's _not_ true. I do admit I want you to be all better," she admitted reluctantly, "but that has _nothing_ to do with how much I love you, you stinker. And Mom and Dad aren't your problem." She searched Elsa's upset eyes, looking for some sign that Elsa might be feeling better.

The older girl just closed her eyes and looked away before abruptly sitting up and scrambling off the bed. Elsa found herself crumpled on the floor a second later. She suddenly just wanted to _scream_. Scream and cry until her stupid self wasn't messed up inside anymore. That was what needed fixing, not messed up legs. She remembered Eliot being so surprised that she'd thought he could do something by himself that one time. She remembered Nikoleta crying during the night and herself trying her best to make Niko feel better. _Those things_ needed fixing. Elsa wished Rapunzel could heal that kind of hurt instead of the physical kind. But no, _nobody_ could fix broken emotions. Never, ever.

 _I hate living like that. I hate knowing other people are living like that!_ Suddenly Elsa felt downright angry. She wanted to explode something. She balled her hands into fists, letting her magic build up there. In a flash, an impenetrable ice bubble formed around her, letting her 'vent' without risking harming the others. _Wait…Elsa, you can actually let yourself let your magic explode if it wants to. You actually can! You don't have to make it stay in! It's safe!_ This knowledge made her laugh, and the angry 'destroy' feelings, along with the angry magic buildup almost instantly faded. The moment had passed. Elsa let the ice bubble disappear and then dragged herself to her feet. "I felt so angry I wanted to explode something, and then I thought ' _Elsa, you actually can let your magic explode if it wants to! It's safe!'_ , and that made me happy," she said contentedly.

Elsa's smile remained even when she lost her balance and fell again. The fact that she could actually _get angry_ or feel _scared_ and not pose any danger to others made her actually feel…normal. No, other people wouldn't make ice or snow when they felt a strong negative emotion, but still. She could panic or explode or cry _without hurting anyone_. Even this long after the Great Thaw, Elsa still found herself worrying about how her magic might react when she felt sad or upset or scared or angry. She trusted herself not to harm others when she was calm or just a little bit emotional, but any extremes made her nervous still. And her 'dark side' still scared her. That tiny angry streak needed to go, even if it was safe to feel like that. _I don't think my magic will do the automatic ice bubble thing unless I want it to deep inside…I can't let that angry bit of me be in control. Ever. So there._

Elsa made a private promise to herself about that. She suddenly recalled Grand Pabbie's warning about what might happen if she ever created life when she was angry. She could only imagine what an "evil" version of Linnae might do, and the thought made her shudder. _I will never let myself do that. Never, ever._

* * *

Elsa awoke early the next morning despite being up late the night before, leaving Anna and Rapunzel still asleep. They both slept like logs (Anna more so), but Elsa didn't. She changed her clothes and fixed her hair, headed straight to Nikoleta's room, and knocked lightly. Surprisingly enough, Eliot answered the door, not Nikoleta.

"S…still sleepin'," Eliot explained.

Elsa nodded in understanding. "That's okay, Eliot. I'll talk to you instead, because what I have to say has to do with you anyways." She followed Eliot into the room and sat down on the carpet next to the little boy; then grinned when she saw the fort with the toy soldiers Eliot had built from blocks. "Anna and I used to play with a set like that a lot. I remember Anna fussed so much that Papa got them for her. I wanted them too, though, and Anna shared them with me sometimes. Did Niko spend her paycheck on those?" The toys looked new, and Elsa knew they weren't the same set she and Anna had played with, although they were similar.

"Uh-huh. She made…'e share with…Ani…Anikka, though." Eliot sounded slightly perturbed at this. He was grateful his big sister had bought him something so nice, but he did _not_ want or like to share with Anikka.

That made Elsa smile. "Maybe you could just put away your favorite ones and share the others," she suggested. "Eliot, is it all right to talk to you about something important?" Elsa asked.

Eliot looked confused. _But…but Elsa's Queen Elsa. Why would she want to know if it's all right to talk to me? And why would she want to talk to a little kid about something important? She's supposed to have the right to ask whatever she wants, right?_ He just nodded, feeling puzzled.

Elsa hesitated, trying to figure out how to phrase herself. "My cousin Rapunzel has magic, too. But it's not ice powers like mine. She can heal people. Or animals-one time she healed a wolf, actually." She glanced at Eliot, wondering what the little boy was thinking. _Elsa, whatever you do, don't hurt him. He's had enough of that already._

"Not heal 'e. Born…this way," Eliot said matter-of-factly. Then he grinned excitedly. "Heal _you_ , Q…Queen Elsa! You're…just hurt. N…not born that 'ay."

"No, Eliot, she can't," Elsa told him quietly. "It's kind of complicated to explain, but it has to do with magic limits. Rapunzel's magic can't heal injuries caused by other magic, just natural ones. And my leg was hurt from magic, so Rapunzel can't do anything to help it. But she might be able to help you. _Only_ if you wanted her to though, of course."

"But I'm 'ot…in-jured. Just m-made dif'rent." Eliot had heard his big sister Nikoleta tell him that for as long as he could remember, and he believed her. 'Made different' wasn't bad, even if he didn't like it. So there.

"I know, Eliot. That's why I wanted to tell you I wasn't sure if Rapunzel could help or not. But she can try if you want her to." Elsa gave Eliot a lopsided smile as she added, "And it's okay to say either yes or no. You get to decide."

Eliot dropped the toy soldier he was holding and looked straight at Elsa's face, specifically her eyes. She wasn't lying or making things up. He could tell. She honestly just wanted to help. Still… "D'you think…I'm m-messed up?" he asked hesitantly.

Elsa visibly flinched, and her blue eyes filled with tears. " _No_ , absolutely not," she replied instantly, her voice cracking. How many times had she asked Anna that exact question? How many times had she _felt_ like people thought she was messed up, even if she said nothing? _Eliot feels like…me? He's just a little kid! Why did his stupid parents have to treat him and Niko like they did?_ And then she realized something else…she was in Anna's position right now. She needed to do for Eliot what Anna did for her.

"'ike me…b…be…better if I w…wasn't…this 'ay?" Eliot asked, inwardly feeling horrible for obviously making Elsa upset, but feeling like he had to know the truth. And Elsa wouldn't lie to him. He knew she wouldn't.

"No, Eliot, I like you just like you are. I don't care whether legs work properly or not." Elsa's voice was shaky, but her sincerity was loud and clear. She reached for Eliot and hugged him tightly, tears slowly trickling down her cheeks. A few tiny snowflakes floated around her, but she ignored them.

Eliot abruptly pulled away, a big smile on his face. He nodded and held Elsa's hand as tightly as he could. "S'prise…Niko. Try," he announced. Somehow Elsa's honest admission had instantly changed his decision. The fact that Elsa honestly didn't mind whether he was 'different' or not made him feel like he didn't have to be 'happy with being himself', like Nikoleta always said he should be. Elsa would still be his friend whether he could talk or walk properly or not; she wouldn't care. "But…ner-vous," he added. If it _did_ work, what was running and playing outside climbing trees like? Maybe it was scary or something. Or what if it just wasn't as nice as he thought it was? And yet he was kind of nervous it wouldn't work, too, even though that made no sense.

Elsa smiled at that. "Whether it works or not, you're still… _you_ , Eliot. Okay?"

* * *

"Of course I'll try," Rapunzel agreed instantly when Elsa came back to her room with Eliot. She gave Eliot a reassuring smile as she knelt beside that comfy chair in Elsa's room where he was sitting. "It won't hurt one bit, Eliot," Rapunzel assured him.

Eliot's smile disappeared a few minutes later when Rapunzel seemed to suddenly grow faint. "What'd I do wrong?" he asked worriedly, not even noticing that he could speak clearer now.

"You didn't do anything, Eliot," Elsa replied quickly as she awkwardly picked up her cousin and managed to get her back on the bed. "Rapunzel, are you all right?" she asked, biting her lip in concern.

Rapunzel nodded. "Yeah…I just…I think my magic wasn't supposed to do that for some reason," she answered. "I don't…feel right. Like there's something missing inside, maybe? I mean, I purposely channeled quite a bit more magic into Eliot since I figured I'd need more since he's not actually just injured, but…" She held her stomach and slowly turned on her side. "I think…I think I…have a stomachache."

Elsa's mind flitted to the time her sixteen-year-old self had made herself sick using too much magic at once in an attempt to flush all the magic out of her. Rapunzel must have done the same thing. And since Rapunzel wasn't used to using her magic a ton at once, it took less for her to get tired. Trying to heal Eliot was for Rapunzel the same as trying to make a ton of water was for Elsa. "If this is what I think it is, you'll feel fine tomorrow, probably in the afternoon," she told her cousin quietly. "I think you've just overstretched your magic, that's all."

"Did it work, though?" Rapunzel asked curiously. "And I'll try again later if I need to, too."

"I don't know. Let me ask Eliot," Elsa said with a smile. She went back over to the little boy, who immediately reached for her hands and held them tightly as he slid off the chair.

Eliot looked up at Elsa nervously, unsure what would happen. He certainly _felt_ different, but…what was he supposed to feel like? "Can you get my s...sis…s…can you get Niko?" he asked hopefully. If it did work, he wanted his big sister there, too.

Elsa smiled and nodded. "Of course. You just sit down 'til I come back with her." _I think now Eliot just has trouble with 's'? It makes sense Rapunzel couldn't heal him entirely._ "Be right back."

Soon Elsa was back with both Nikoleta and Anikka. While she'd been gone, Rapunzel had managed to wake Anna up, too, who had immediately gotten up and convinced Eliot to try walking by himself. The second Eliot saw Nikoleta, he ran across the room and promptly fell into her. "Niko, Els…Elsa's friend helped me!" he exclaimed happily. "I'm not good at balancing s…still, but look at me! I can _run_!"

Elsa remained standing in the doorway feeling awkward for a good full minute just watching before silently slipping away unnoticed. _I'm not needed anymore._ Rapunzel had done everything and Anna had gotten Eliot confident enough to actually try, not her. And…and nobody had paid her any mind at all. She had no desire to be the center of attention-actually, she _hated_ that-but deep inside, she _did_ want the others to want to include her. She wished one of them would have asked her to stay or something else stupid like that. _That's selfish, Elsa. Your friends don't owe you anything at all after all the trouble they've gone to before trying to calm you down and whatnot._

Now Elsa felt herself beginning to cry, and she ducked into the nearest guest room so she could be out of sight. This one was empty aside from an old mattress against the wall and a couple old chairs tossed in a corner. She pushed it flat on the for and then just flopped down on it on her tummy, her face hidden in her arms. _Elsa, what on earth is wrong?! Why exactly are you so upset?_

 _I don't know. I don't know! I_ know _they were all just excited, and rightly so. They should have been excited! I just felt…ignored all of a sudden. And different. I'm scared of being ignored. What if everyone leaves me all alone again, like when I was little?_ Elsa didn't hear the light knock on the door or the almost-silent footsteps coming toward her since she was lost in her thoughts.

* * *

"Hey, what's wrong, Miss Icy? Kristoff and I crashed in the room next to this one last night, and I thought I heard crying from in here a couple minutes ago, so I came to check it out. Kristoff went out to the stables already, by the way."

Elsa easily recognized that voice-and no one else called her 'Miss Icy'! But Eugene's usual jokey, teasing tone was gone, despite calling her the silly nickname. "Nothing…s-sorry I bothered you," she replied quietly, trying unsuccessfully to wipe her eyes and stop crying.

Eugene raised one eyebrow. " 'Nothing' made you upset enough to run off in here and cry? That must be a pretty bad nothing!" he deadpanned. "You could, you know, tell me about the alleged 'nothing'. I don't bite. I won't even invade your personal three feet of space by even an inch. And I already saw you bawling, so you don't have to be embarrassed for whatever."

A tiny trace of a smile appeared on Elsa's tear-streaked face at that. She sat up and wiped her eyes again before actually looking up at Eugene. True to his word, he'd dragged one of the chairs out of the corner and was sitting on it back-to-front about a yard or so away from her. "I think it really is nothing, though," she said softly. _I don't have a good reason to be upset at all._

"A nothing can't make you upset, though. It has to be _something_ even if it's an illogical something or a something that you only thought existed. I know! You're upset because _all of the castle's chocolate is gone,_ " Eugene said, as if he were telling her a great big secret. "Everyone knows you and Anna are, like, obsessed with chocolate."

Elsa giggled at that despite her tears. "No, I just…thought of something that rather scared me." She cut herself off abruptly. Could she really tell Eugene what had made her so upset and what frightened her? It sounded ridiculous and selfish and just plain stupid. "And I think it's kind of…selfish," Elsa added hesitantly, trying to read Eugene's expression. He didn't even react. "And it hurt." _Selfish is bad! I am not supposed to feel like that. I am not supposed to be scared, either. Or hurt. I am stupid and just…I don't know…_ "But I felt happy I helped a tiny bit, too. But mostly left out. That's selfish." She sounded confused, unsure how to explain herself.

Eugene thought for a minute before answering. Elsa wasn't his wife Rapunzel; he didn't know her that well and she was clearly much less talkative and easily readable. It almost seemed like Elsa was having trouble accepting that she had emotions that weren't simple and easy to understand, that she could have a bunch at once, even. The way Elsa spoke about the way she felt sounded like a child talking about her feelings, not a twenty-one-year-old. _Wait a minute…Elsa grew up_ concealing _her emotions. Of course she talks about them like a child would. I think she was about eight when she was locked away, right? So, that would make sense. It's been not quite a year since Elsa got her sister back and figured out her magic or whatever. That means she deals with emotions approximately like her_ nine _-year-old self would have, more or less. Probably less, since I think her parents treated her like crap even before they locked her away. So she's basically a little kid emotionally._ "Does it have something to do with an old war wound?" Eugene asked finally. He'd noticed her fiddling with one of the fastenings on her brace and figured it probably had something to do with that somehow.

" _What_?"

Eugene couldn't help laughing at Elsa's obviously befuddled expression. "Your bum leg, Miss Icy. You got hurt saving Anna's life, right?"

"Well, yes, but it wasn't in a _war_ ," Elsa pointed out.

"Eh. Close enough. War wound. Has it got something to do with that?"

Elsa bit her lip as she tried to figure out what to say. "I guess…sort of? I just…I don't know. Usually I really don't care at all, but Rapunzel managed to mostly heal little Eliot, and I saw him running, and I _can't_ , and I'll never be able to do that again. I felt happy for him, but it made me feel…messed up and different all over again." Elsa's words tumbled out faster and faster as she went on, "And I was just standing in the doorway feeling awkward for what felt like ages even though it was probably about a minute and none of them said anything to me and nobody noticed when I left and…a-and…it…scared me." _I'm scared of being ignored. What if everyone leaves me all alone again?_ "It _hurt_."

Eugene could see Elsa starting to shake all over, and he wasn't sure what to do to calm her down. She was clearly genuinely terrified-she looked like she was about to have a panic attack. "Elsa, I have no idea how to help you if you start panicking really bad. You've got to calm down," he said quickly, unsure whether he should come any closer to her or not. "Does…taking deep breaths help, maybe? That's usually calming. Should I go get Anna?"

Elsa shook her head and closed her eyes, trying her best to slow her breathing down. _Thanks, Eugene. Deep breathing does help, but I still forget once in a while. You caught me before I actually got…all weirded out. I don't know what to call it._ After a minute or two, she felt much better, although her bad leg still ached a bit from feeling like that. "I'm sorry. I'm much better about that than I used to be, but I still just…get really scared over nothing sometimes. I'm sorry," she said again, shaking her head in disgust with herself.

"Don't be sorry. It's funny how you can face up to bombers no trouble and your own thoughts scare you, Miss Icy," Eugene told her with a slight smirk. "Quite brave, if you ask me." The smirk vanished as he added, "In all seriousness, you're really quiet compared to Anna and Blondie and those little kids and even your Niko friend. I doubt they were really _ignoring_ you so much as not realizing they weren't including you simply because you weren't acting crazy and noisy like they were right then. I mean, yes I think they should have thought to say 'Hey, come join in!', but they were _not_ trying to leave you out. In fact I'll bet one of 'em is looking for you right now wondering where you went."

Elsa's expression lifted, and she smiled a tiny bit. "I suppose so. That makes sense," she agreed happily. _That really does make sense. It's like when Anna and Rapunzel were discussing what to do last night and I had to speak up or they'd kind of take over. I guess I'm too quiet in some situations._

"You really ought to take each of 'em aside and tell them so they know what you need. You _are_ different, but that's what makes you special. They're different too, just not in the same ways you are." Eugene paused before adding, "I don't know your idiotic parents, but whatever they did to you was wrong."

"Did to me?" she asked blankly.

"Elsa, you know what I'm talking about. You're no dummy. I don't even know you that well yet, and I _know_ you're hurt inside. They made you think you're 'damaged goods'. That you're not worth bothering with. _That's_ why you felt so upset. You know what else? I think deep inside you know that's unfair. And Elsa, it's _okay_ to feel lots of emotions at once. Negative ones included. That's normal. There's nothing wrong with you."

Elsa bit her lip hard. "Feeling selfish is bad. That needs to stop," she said firmly. "I have no reason to feel like that. It's wrong." She realized Eugene would only call her by her real name when he was being extra serious.

"You didn't feel selfish, you felt jealous," Eugene said, grinning. "Didn't sound like you wanted the center of attention. Or credit for helping that little kid, either. It sounded like you wanted to be in included in the nutty excitement. Let's say you _were_ included, Miss Icy. Fixes most of the awful nasty horrible _'evil'_ emotions, right? Everything but whatever you felt about your leg?"

"Well…yes, actually." Elsa considered that for a long minute. She remembered how happy and excited she had been the first time she'd managed to stand on her own when Gerda had first shown her that brace. Gerda had spent quite a while with her adjusting it so it would actually work for her and be as comfortable as possible. _Gerda didn't have to do that. I remember I was so grateful to be able to walk at all, even though I had to wear a brace to be able to do so._ She slowly unstrapped her brace from her leg and just held it instead of tossing it aside like she usually did. _Anna and Kiara told Gerda about the idea, and Gerda asked Dr. Raske to make it for me_ because _they cared about me. They didn't just shove me aside because I couldn't do something, and they could have._ "I still wish I could run too, but I'm not upset anymore," Elsa said finally. "I'm okay like I am." Then she scowled. "Actually, what I would rather do is be able to go ice-skating with Anna again."

Eugene just smirked at her again. "Why can't you do that just like you are? You'd probably look a little funny, but I bet you can go ice-skating just fine," he said matter-of-factly. "And I don't mean because of your magic, either."

Elsa tilted her head to one side in consideration. _I hope so, but I kind of doubt it…_ She jumped when she heard multiple pairs of feet thumping into the room. "I'm sorry I disappeared," she apologized.

* * *

"We were looking _all over_ for you, you stinker!" Anna exclaimed, bouncing down on the mattress next to Elsa. "You just disappeared, and we didn't know where you went!" She frowned, noticing the dried tear tracks on her sister's cheeks. "Elsa, you've been crying. And…and Eugene heard you and came to try to help you feel better?"

Elsa nodded and didn't resist when Anna squished her tightly. "And he was nice and polite and didn't get in my space," she mumbled, suddenly worried that Rapunzel wouldn't want her alone with him, although she needn't have worried.

"Rapunzel said she thought Elsa was probably with you, Kristoff, Kai, or Gerda, and she was right," Anna said now. "Thank you for helping her." She turned her attention back to Elsa. "What made you so upset? You seemed really happy, and then a minute later we realized you were gone and I got really worried and I thought you were gonna think we were ignoring you or didn't want you or something, and-"

"That's because you thought right," Elsa replied almost inaudibly. Curled up in her little sister's arms, Elsa felt like her original reason for feeling so upset was ridiculous. Of course Anna and her friends weren't ignoring her. They had been _looking_ for her.

"Can I talk t' you, Els…Els-sa? Like by myself?" Eliot asked shyly.

Elsa nodded. "Of course you can." Eliot plopped down beside her as the others left the room. "We'll have breakfast in my room with Rapunzel. Don't wait for us," she called after them.

* * *

Eliot waited until everyone was gone before saying anything. "Are…are you mad at me?" he asked hesitantly.

"No! Why would I be mad at you?!" Elsa responded instantly. _Wait a minute…_ She awkwardly tucked her bad leg under her when she saw Eliot looking at it, feeling self-conscious. "It has something to do with bad legs, I gather," she deadpanned, looking at the little boy curiously.

"Well…I dunno. I jus' kinda felt bad. Not _for_ you-I think you're fine. But I did feel bad 'cause Rapunzel helped me and she can't help you and…I dunno. S…stupid, I think." Eliot frowned, trying to figure out how to word what he wanted to say. "You help everybody 'cept _you_. You made me really, really happy, like the firs…fir't time I met you and you were jus' being you."

Elsa still felt a little confused, although she thought she understood. Eliot was worried she was mad at him because she was still hurt and he was mostly better now, aside from that slight trip over all the 's'-es and balance issues. "I'll have to admit I felt a bit…jealous-just a bit-but I am _not_ mad at you. And I'm okay with it now," she said quietly. _That's true, too. I_ am _okay with it. I'm still just…me._

"For real?"

Elsa nodded and gave him a lopsided smile. "Yes, Eliot, for real. Because all the people that actually matter don't care whether I need a brace on my leg or not. They'll care about me anyway. I just have trouble remembering that sometimes when I get scared or upset," she admitted. Eliot wouldn't hurt her for admitting the truth. She knew he wouldn't.

"But you haven't got to be s…scared! You're the queen," Eliot exclaimed. He suddenly realized Elsa now seemed _very_ interested in strapping her brace back on her leg and wouldn't meet his eyes anymore. "I'm s…s-sorry."

"Don't be sorry. It's true. I just…I don't know. Sometimes I don't feel any older than you are now," Elsa told him, her voice slightly shaky but sincere. "And I get scared I won't be able to do the right things, or that people won't…accept me. I mean…do _you_ think I look like a queen should?" she asked, fully expecting a 'no, but I like you anyway' reply.

But Eliot just scowled. "Yep! You take care of ev'ryone and you take…take control even if you're s…s-scared. That' queenish…queenly?...to me!" He hesitantly reached to touch Elsa's brace and added, "Yours… _much_ nic…nicer than mine were. And looks better, too."

" _What?_ "

"Your brace looks way better than mine did. Much nic…nic-cer," Eliot repeated confidently. "Metal shiny, not all dull. Like a new coin. Badas-s… cyborg S…Snow Queen!"

Elsa laughed. "Don't use that word-it's a bit nasty. But thank you for that all the same." _I know I'm going to remember that. It might be silly, but I don't care._ "Thank you all the same. Come on, let's go get breakfast. Last one to my room is a rotten egg!"

 **A/N: Okay...sorry for the late chapter.:) I had a bit of trouble with this one because I don't want to offend anyone in real life by letting Rapunzel help Eliot, and yet it's illogical if she can't. So, to clear things up, Rapunzel was able to help Eliot, but she can't heal him 100% because he was born that way, and she also made herself tired in the process. Thank you to raven678 for the suggestion to just focus on Elsa's reaction. :)**

 **Next chapter coming soon!**


	31. Chapter 31

**A/N: Thanks to everyone who's followed/favorited and/or is reading but not reviewing:)**

 **FluffyKitten-Thank you:) Um, the lousy pun was indeed on purpose. Because I am lame and stupid and I thought it was funny, especially since Elsa had no idea of the pun she had made. :P Angry Elsa should scare anyone within...well, within however far her magic can reach. Which is a LOT. See, Elsa's control over her magic is good enough at this point that if deep inside she doesn't wish to hurt anyone (which is 99.99999% of the time), her ice won't (at least not badly:)). But should that internal thought process buffer ever disappear...well, let's just say that wouldn't be good. She's more than strong enough to cause trouble for a lot more people than just her country. I kind of have this picture in my head of Elsa wearing her ice-armor and she certainly fits Eliot's description.:) And yet she's still just friendly and a bit shy Elsa, too.**

 **Guest-Thank you:)**

 **Elsa Tomago-I don't think Elsa should have agreed either, but I just thought she would at that moment.:) I like it when Elsa is able to help someone else feel better instead of the other way around. I think it might be an introvert thing. *sigh* Because Elsa's logic is completely sound to me, and I'm definitely an introvert.:P And it's not stupid.:)**

 **Elsa and Ingrid-I'm not a good artist; I don't think you want to see any drawing/art I might make of a character.:P**

 **Olivia O'Neil-Thank you:) More on that soon!:)**

 **IndyGirl89-I thought since Eugene doesn't know Elsa all that well yet, they ought to talk a bit. Also, Eugene's lighthearted and down-to-earth teasing is really different to Elsa.:)**

 **moohamquest-Being able to feel angry without being scared of hurting others is indeed a big step for Elsa.:) (Made her happy, too:)) Elsa's fine; she just needs to actually realize that. She doesn't need to heal her leg to be okay.:) And don't worry about not reviewing for awhile:)**

 **DodgersGirl-Thank you:) Eugene just strikes me as the sort of person who would act that way. Also, Elsa has never seen anyone react that way when she's upset. All she knows is either someone fussing over her or pretty much telling her to get it together. Someone genuinely caring and yet not being all fussy made her feel better easily.:) And I think it's cool you have a friend like that:)**

 **On to the story! (Sorry for the 2-week wait.:/ And get ready for some fluff this chapter:))**

By that evening, the U.S. visitors had left, taking Ms. Diane with them, and Rapunzel felt much better. "You know what we should all do this weekend?" Eugene asked at dinner, grinning and rubbing his hands together as if he had a big secret. "Go camping. I'll bet everyone's favorite friendly socially repressed Miss Icy has never gone camping."

Rapunzel elbowed him hard. "Eugene, that's _mean_!" she protested. "You'll make Elsa all upset again."

But Eugene was unapologetic. "I will not. Look, she's laughing. You girls need to quit treating her like some glass artifact or something. Good grief. She's fine. She's not going to break if you tease her."

And Elsa _was_ laughing. She liked that Eugene actually considered her well enough to tease without hurting her somehow. Besides, what he'd said _was_ kind of true. "I have too gone camping. Anna and I got to go camping when we were little," she said.

"You guys probably went with your parents and brought food from the castle or whatever. I mean _really_ go camping. Don't bring supplies or anything-except water. Kristoff and I could help all you girls learn to rough it."

"Who says we would need help?!" Anna retorted, slightly miffed. "I bet we could handle ourselves just fine. So there! Right, Elsa?"

Elsa's blue eyes twinkled mischievously. _I wonder if we could have our own survival thing by ourselves. Like that TV show thing, but without the TV part._ "Right. How about a little contest? Let's see, there are…nine of us here. We could split up into three teams of three and see who does the best over the weekend with mini contests and things like that. Like who comes up with the best shelter or makes the best dinner. Two points for winning, one for second, none for third. Whichever team has the most points when we get back wins. No helping other teams, either. Period." She thought for a moment before adding, "And anyone can come up with a new contest if they want to. You are not allowed to go easy on anyone. And we'll leave early tomorrow morning. That's Friday…we can come back early Monday morning."

"But you have magic. That's an unfair advantage!" Eugene protested.

"Not five minutes ago you thought I needed help," Elsa deadpanned. She let him think about that for a few seconds before continuing, "That being said, I'm not allowed to 'fly' and I'm only allowed to use my magic if it helps my whole team directly, not just me. Fair?"

Anna scowled. _I suppose this could be fun, but…_ "That's _more_ than fair. So that's settled. How are we picking teams? I want Elsa on mine," she said firmly.

"We'll pick them out of a hat," Elsa answered quickly. "That makes it fair to everyone."

Soon they had settled who was on which team (Eugene, Eliot, and Kristoff; Rapunzel, Kiara, and Nikoleta; and Elsa, Anna, and Anikka), and Anna was delighted that she had ended up with Elsa on her team, and Elsa was just a bit worried that both Kristoff and Eugene ended up on the same team. Just a bit, though…she did have one thing that _none_ of the others had. She could make a perfect shelter for her team within seconds with her magic.

* * *

When all nine of them met in the courtyard early the next morning, they decided to all go in Kristoff's sled-wagon most of the way, and then race on foot the last bit of the way to the actual campsite, which was the clearing with the pond Elsa and Anna had gone camping at when they were little. Elsa held Anikka tightly on her lap and just looked away from the others. _I'm going to make my team lose. I know I will._

 _It's only the first contest-thing, Elsa. It doesn't matter. You also read in the library last night that you can use ice to start a fire. You can do that easily, and you_ know _someone will suggest a fire-making contest._

"Elsa, why're you upset?" Anikka asked quietly in Elsa's ear.

Elsa flinched at the little girl's matter-of-fact question. "I'm going to make us lose that race. I can't run," she whispered back.

"But we'll have the bestest shelter," Anikka informed her happily. She knew having Elsa on her team meant they were at a major disadvantage for running-type games, but she thought Elsa had something loads better. They could keep food frozen for the whole weekend; they would have the best shelter by far. Besides, she liked the idea of getting to spend all weekend with Elsa without the older girl having to work or something. Or getting herself hurt trying to save people.

"I think we picked the best 'extra items'," Anna commented to her two teammates. They had all mutually agreed that each team could bring three extra things-one for each person. Elsa had picked a big bag of apples from the kitchen (if they couldn't find anything to eat, she and Anna and little Anikka wouldn't be hungry, anyways), Anna had chosen a small lantern, and Anikka had brought a giant blanket for them to share. Anna knew Elsa could easily make a nice shelter, but it wouldn't be very warm!

"I think so too," Elsa agreed. She smiled, thinking that it really didn't matter if they won or not. At least she would have fun for the weekend with all her and Anna's friends. Elsa still did _not_ like the idea of losing, though-much like Anna, she had a competitive streak too, and hated losing silly games even if she knew it didn't really matter.

"I hope if we don't win, then the other all-girl team will," Anna whispered to Elsa. "'Cause if they don't, then that makes all us girls look bad!"

Elsa tried her best to stifle her giggles. "I could just drop ice cubes down their backs," she deadpanned.

Anna's green-blue eyes sparkled mischievously. "Yeah, you just do that! That's hilarious!"

"What's so funny?" Eugene asked from the front of the sled-wagon.

"Nothing!" Anna answered instantly, plastering a far too innocent expression on her face, just as Elsa said, "Ice cubes," and nothing else.

"They want to drop ice cubes down everyone's backs," Kristoff explained helpfully. He had seen Elsa do that to Anna before, and there was no other explanation for why Anna would think something about ice cubes was so funny all of a sudden. "Well, we're here. We're pretty close. Bout a half mile, I'm guessing."

* * *

In seconds, everyone was out of the sled and speed-walking toward the camp-area carrying whatever supplies they had picked to bring. Anna carried the bag of apples under one arm and put the other around Elsa's shoulders, little Anikka carried the blanket, and Elsa carried the lantern. Anna was already a hundred percent sure her team would get there last, so her only concern was making sure Elsa was all right. Half a mile was way too far for Elsa to go all at once. If Anna had to, she would just pick Elsa up and carry her. So there. "Elsa, it won't matter. We have a guaranteed two points when it's time to make our shelters," Anna informed her.

The girls walked in silence for a few minutes, the only interruption being Elsa's annoyed comments every time she tripped over a rock or branch. "You know what, I'm tired of this. I'm doing something different," Elsa announced after awhile. In a flash, a simple, small wagon appeared in front of them. She took the apples from Anna and then plopped down in the wagon. "You can pull me instead. That has to be at least twice as fast as you having to catch me every time I slip. And the axles won't snap if leaves or something gets caught in them."

Anna grinned. "Too bad you didn't think of this when we started! Hey, hold Anikka on your lap. I can run faster than she can, so I'll just pull both of you."

In seconds, Elsa and Anikka were settled in the small wagon, and Anna took off, the wagon bumping crazily along behind her. Anikka squealed when they nearly tipped over, and Elsa held her tightly. _This is…fun. I wish I could just play normally, like everyone else did, but this is a fun substitute._ They went careening around turns, nearly tipping every time; and bounced over branches and rocks in their path. True to Elsa's word, the wagon remained unharmed without even a dent. At the last moment before they reached the clearing, Anna accidentally ran the wagon right into a big rock, and both Elsa and Anikka were tossed right out.

"Grand entrance," Eugene teased, slightly surprised that they had gotten there that quickly. Yes, they'd arrived last, just like Elsa had figured they would, but not by much.

Anna frowned. What if she'd hurt Elsa or little Anikka, letting them get dumped out like that? "I'm sorry-I didn't see the rock, and-"

"Anna, stop it," Elsa interrupted, shaking her head as Anikka helped her to her feet. "I'm _fine_ , and so is Anikka. Not even a scratch. You dumped us in a bunch of pine needles," she added, smiling. "Even our apples are okay, I think," Elsa went on as she peeked in the bag to see if the fruit was bruised or not.

"You guys brought apples?" Kiara asked, crossing her arms. "That's no fair! I thought we all agreed no food!" She and Rapunzel and Nikoleta had brought a fishing pole, a tarp, and some flint.

"We did not!" Anna shot back. "We all agreed _three extra things_. And Elsa picked ONE bag of apples, and Anikka and I each brought a blanket. So there!"

"To be fair, I brought one bag of carrots," Kristoff said now. "It's not their problem you guys didn't choose to bring one thing of food. You have a fishing pole. Go catch some dinner in the pond instead."

Kiara wasn't happy, but she decided to drop the issue. "Well, we have one point," she said peevishly.

"We have none. YET," Anikka said pointedly. "C'n we make shelters now?" She put her hands on her hips and added, " _We're_ gonna win now!"

* * *

In less than a minute, Elsa had carefully created an icy tent-not a little house, because she wanted to actually feel like she was "going camping" since she hadn't done that since she was little. "I put ice on the floor so we won't be sleeping directly on the ground, and I made a soft snow pile for us to sleep on," Elsa said now.

Anna and Anikka exchanged glances. "Let's put squishy pine needles on them," Anna suggested. "'Cause your snow might be soft, but it's too cold!"

Elsa grinned. "Okay. There are plenty of pine needles over where you dumped Anikka and me out earlier." She looked over at where the others were making their 'shelters', and she nodded in satisfaction. Theirs was already almost finished since her magic had let them build much, much faster. "I think ours is the best," she whispered to Anna.

"No kidding," Anna said, running over to where all the pine needles were. "Elsa, you can just stay there and arrange the pine needles on our snow-bed, 'kay?" _I don't want Elsa falling out here._ Although Anna was happy to be off doing something fun with her big sister, she was worried about Elsa handling uneven ground with her bad leg. Rapunzel was there, so even if Elsa did hurt herself, she'd be fine; but Anna was worried Elsa might make herself upset or something. That was _not_ easily fixable.

"Anna, I can help too, you know," Elsa said quietly when Anna brought back the first armful of pine needles. "And it'd be faster if we filled up the little wagon you pulled Anikka and me here in instead of carrying the needles by hand." She bit her lip when she saw Anna glancing concernedly at her braced leg. "Just because I limp doesn't mean I can't help. It's not like it's any long distance, even." _Anna, why don't you want me to help? Are you afraid I'm going to slow us down, maybe…?_

"I just don't want you hurt in any way if I can help it," Anna explained. "You built the whole shelter for us. Anikka and I can do the rest. Elsa, you couldn't even walk all the way here by yourself. I had to pull you. I mean, I didn't mind, but-"

"But your big sister is messed up. I know," Elsa said flatly. _Elsa, she's just concerned about you and being overprotective. She doesn't mind you being…you. Stop being so touchy._ "Anna, please let me help. Please?" _Good grief, Elsa, quit feeling like you're about to cry. You are such a crybaby. Stop it. What is wrong with you?_ Elsa involuntarily flinched when Anna took her by the hand and yanked her out of their icy tent. "What are you doing?"

Anna just hugged her close. "Letting you help, you stinker. You looked like you were going to cry, and you made that stupid puppy-dog face. Quit that!" _Wait a minute…Elsa could have just insisted on helping instead of asking and saying all those 'please?' things. She wanted me to_ choose _to let her help._

* * *

A little while later, the three of them decided their shelter was all done, and Elsa happily scrambled inside with Anna and Anikka right behind her. While she knew there were six other people nearby, Elsa felt like she was alone with just Anna and Anikka in their icy tent, which was cozy and made her happy. "I like it here," Elsa commented quietly. "It's cozy. I won't feel…lonely one bit when it's time to go to sleep."

Anna frowned at her. "Is that your way of saying you still feel lonely at home sometimes at night?" she demanded.

Elsa shrugged and didn't reply. _Just a little bit. I'm mostly okay, but I do still feel lonely at night sometimes when I'm by myself. Only sometimes, though._ She didn't get nightmares constantly anymore like she had right after the Great Thaw, but she did feel…not safe at night sometimes. Like everything wouldn't be all right in the morning anymore. It wasn't enough to keep her from falling asleep, but the feelings were still there and they made her sad and worried. _I'm supposed to be all better now. It's been almost a year._

"Elsa, you should have told me or Gerda," Anna said gently. "We could have done something different, you know."

Elsa's blue eyes flashed as they snapped up to meet Anna's. "Like what?! Have someone babysit me 'til I'm eighty years old? Anna, it's not even like I can't-" She cut herself off and turned to Anikka. "Anikka, could you please go see what everyone else is doing? Please?" _Little Anikka doesn't need to hear this._ The second the little girl was gone, Elsa turned her focus back to Anna. "Anna, it's not even like I can't sleep. It's not those horrible nightmares either anymore. Those have dwindled to just once in a while, which is probably normal, I'd assume. So…I don't know…" _I can stop dangerous explosive things by myself and I don't like being alone at night. That's ridiculous..._

"No, you goof, you don't need someone to babysit you," Anna said patiently. "But you _do_ need help all the same. You shouldn't have to feel lonely in your own home _at all_ , not even a little bit." She hesitated before asking, "Am I right in thinking it's not the feeling lonely bit so much as knowing that you do feel like that sometimes makes you upset?"

Elsa wouldn't look at Anna, but she just whispered, "It makes me sad. I am supposed to be fine now. I…I didn't want to disappoint you. I _know_ I'm the family disappointment, but I…I wanted to make you and Mama and Papa p-proud of…m-me." _Elsa, that's ridiculous. Who would be proud of a grown girl your age just for that?!_

"You are _not_ the family disappointment!" Anna instantly pulled Elsa close and just held her tightly. She felt hot tears burning in her own eyes when she heard Elsa's stifled cries. _What am I supposed to do to make Elsa be all right again? She just wants to make the rest of us proud of her? And why would she assume she's supposed to be fine by now?_ "Elsa, don't you understand? I, for one, am _already_ proud of you. You try so hard on everything, even when no one could possibly expect you to. You've _always_ done that. Always." Anna took Elsa's cold hand and pressed it to her sister's heart. "That's the part of you that _you_ should be proud of, Elsa. I want you to answer something. Why _is_ your heart still…Elsa? 'Cause that part of you certainly doesn't need any fixing at all. Tell me that." _But Elsa doesn't need 'fixing'. She just needs_ help. _I'm supposed to be getting that sort of thinking OUT of Elsa's head, not encouraging it!_

"I…I don't know?" _That's a weird question. How am I supposed to answer that?_ Elsa bit her lip as she tried to figure out what to say. "I'm sorry. I don't know," she said again, frustrated for not coming up with a good reply.

"Well, I'm gonna tell you then, you stinker. It's because you love everyone else around you. You're sweet and sensitive, and I think even though you did lose all hope at one point," Anna gently touched the faint scar on Elsa's left wrist, "you always had some otherwise. Even if it was just a teeny weeny bit."

"I think it was just because you were talking to me," Elsa put in flatly. "Because I would _not_ be here if I didn't or hadn't had you." That Elsa believed with all her heart. Even right this second, she was absolutely sure that if something horrible happened to Anna, she wouldn't live very long after that even if she wanted to.

Anna sighed. "Elsa, that's definitely not the point! What I was going to say is that you being sensitive is also what makes you get all upset so easily, that's all. And…Elsa, I'm not sure how to put this, but…I think even _I_ don't consider you the right way sometimes. Because you don't have to be mean to someone like our parents were to you to be…not fair." _C'mon, Elsa, please understand. I don't know how to explain myself…and I don't want to make you upset again._

"I don't understand. I _know_ you don't dislike me," Elsa replied confidently, giving Anna a lopsided smile. "I don't understand why you don't, but…still."

"Elsa, I just mean…well, let me ask you something else. I was just thinking…how did Eugene help you feel better so easily? You barely even know him, so I know it wasn't because you totally trusted him. Did he say something different than what Rapunzel or I might have said to you if we'd been there, maybe?" Anna already had a good idea of what exactly had helped Elsa, and she wanted to know so she could be sure to change her own 'help Elsa' words, too. And tell Rapunzel about them.

"Well…he teased me? He pretended to think I was upset because all of the castle chocolate was missing. Then he called my bad leg a war wound. I didn't get it at first, but then I thought it was funny. And I said I wished I could go ice skating with you again, and he said he thought I could just like I am but that I'd look a little funny. The only time he actually acted all worried was when I felt like I might panic. Then he said he didn't know how to help if I panicked and asked if he should go get you." Elsa tilted her head to one side, considering what she'd just said. _It was probably because he didn't make a giant deal over me being…stupid me. He talked to me just like he would Anna or anyone else._

"Elsa," Anna said quietly, "he did what no one in the castle-even me-has done. Eugene helped you because he was able to treat you just like he would anyone else. Just a regular girl, no unfair biases."

"But you do that too," Elsa insisted.

"No, sis, I don't. Not on purpose, I swear! Elsa, I love you very, very much. But I'm still biased," Anna said slowly, her cheeks red in embarrassment. _Elsa, please don't cry…_ "I'm trying not to, but still. Like you panicking sometimes or you having a bad leg certainly doesn't make me love or care about you any less, but I'm not being fair to you."

Elsa's face scrunched up in confusion. "D'you mean like with not wanting to let me help gather the pine needles 'cause you were worried I couldn't?"

"Yeah, Elsa, exactly! And-" Anna cut herself off when she heard Elsa's next question.

"And you think I need _fixing_ instead of _help_?" Elsa didn't cry, but she looked away and refused to meet her little sister's eyes. She still wasn't entirely sure she understood…was Anna really saying she was being biased and unfair to her and yet love her lots anyway? That didn't make sense.

Anna sighed again. "Sort of, I guess? I mean, I don't think happy, confident Elsa needs fixing, but…"

"But present, broken Elsa that can't walk right does."

"You aren't broken, Elsa!"

* * *

"You don't have to fix things that aren't broken, Anna," Elsa said in a flat voice. She wrapped her arms around her middle and just kept her eyes down. Maybe Anna wouldn't see the tears filling her eyes. Elsa wanted _so badly_ to be good enough for Anna to not think of her as that broken, frightened little girl that it hurt. Why couldn't she be all better by now? "It's been a _year_ ," she choked out. _Don't cry, Elsa. That's just going to reinforce whatever Anna already thinks…_ And yet…she couldn't be upset with Anna. She _did_ still feel hurt and sad inside sometimes. Not as much as before, but it was still there.

"You can't really count 'a year', you stinker," Anna corrected as she hugged Elsa tightly again. "You were so sick back around Christmastime. I talked to Gerda, you know. She said feeling all depressed and stuff could have been an aftereffect from having meningitis. Then, not long after that, that ol' creep Jade made me hurt you during that whole cave incident. I know that really scared and upset you. Not to mention all the other political stuff you've been taking care of all this time. So, considering all those things, I think you're doing fine. Much, much better." Anna paused for a minute before continuing, "And all that time you've been getting used to needing that brace, too." Pause. "Elsa, one more thing. I love you lots no matter what. Me being stupidly biased doesn't change that. I promise."

Elsa glanced from her bad leg to her clasped hands and then to Anna. "Even if I couldn't walk at all and I was too scared to t-talk to you?"

Anna scowled but instantly said, "Yes, Elsa. No matter what. Pinky promise."

Elsa's blue eyes lit up at that as she linked her own pinky with Anna's. You didn't break pinky promises. You just didn't. "Thanks, Anna. Thank you very, very much." _I don't think Anna knows how much that meant to me…_

"And Elsa, one more thing. I'm sorry I've been treating you like a kicked puppy or something. That's what Kristoff said I was doing. I guess maybe since him and Eugene are guys, they aren't as fussy about emotions?"

"That's a stereotype, Anna. Guys have emotions, too, just like we do. Did Mama and Papa put these ideas in your head?" Elsa asked curiously. She wasn't even sure where she had gotten her own ideas of what were stereotypes and what weren't. Maybe people threw them on her and therefore hated them? She didn't know.

"Maybe? Dad always sounded kind of snobby about the idea of people crying or having emotional problems. That's prob'ly why he wouldn't accept that you felt depressed before he and Mom left on that trip. Anyways, I think hearing that just made me feel bad instead, and maybe that's why I always end up fussing over you and, ok, probably being overprotective. I don't want snitty comments hurting you or making you upset." Anna frowned as she added, "Am _I_ hurting you by being all fussy and overprotective 'cause you're…hurt? I don't wanna do that!"

Elsa gave Anna a lopsided smile. "No, but you probably aren't giving me a chance to heal and do things on my own. And me not telling you or anyone else about things, like feeling lonely at night, doesn't help either. That's my fault. I don't _know,_ because I'm not good with emotions, but maybe you're fussing over the wrong things sometimes? I don't know…" _I wonder why no one has come and bugged us yet…we've been talking a long time…_

"Like your bad leg?" Anna asked.

Elsa nodded. "That's not a reason to feel bad for me," she said softly. "It's just…there. It doesn't even hurt or anything. It's kind of like saying you feel bad for me because I have platinum hair or something, which is obviously silly." She glanced at her braced leg for a moment before looking back at Anna. "I meant to tell you-and Kiara, for that matter-thank you for telling Gerda about your idea that a brace would help. I need to tell Gerda and Dr. Raske thank-you too when we get home."

"Why _wouldn't_ we have told Gerda about it? Of course we did," Anna informed her indignantly. "So you don't owe me or Kiara a thank-you. I just wanted to help, even if the idea wasn't perfect." She gave Elsa's hand a reassuring squeeze. _Elsa, what on earth are you talking about? That would have been really mean if we hadn't said anything, you goof._

"May we please just go build our fire now?" Elsa asked, abruptly changing the subject. "I think I can actually make one myself. Besides, I'm sure everyone is probably thinking we just don't want to participate in any more mini-contests. And I don't want that!"

That made Anna giggle. "Ok, Elsa. Let's go."

 **A/N: So yeah...short-ish fluffy conversation chapter. :) I thought all the characters deserved it before getting launched into fixing the whole mystery and stuff. :)**

 **Next chapter coming soon (and it won't take 2 weeks this time)! :)**


	32. Chapter 32

**A/N: Thanks to everyone who's followed/favorited and/or is reading but not reviewing:)**

 **Elsa Tomago-I'm glad you liked it:) Yeah, Anna kind of tends to fuss over Elsa a lot.:P That was fine for awhile, but she's not giving Elsa a chance to do things by herself. That being said, I understand why Anna does that, too:)**

 **IndyGirl89-I PMed you, so I won't make you reread the same thing here:)**

 **DodgersGirl-I'm not sure if that's a good thing or a bad thing. Good because it means I wrote Elsa's feelings accurately, but bad because I don't want my friend feeling that way.:/**

 **Love Elsa a lot-Posted a new Dear Elsa chapter earlier today, actually! :P**

 **FluffyKitten-Thank you for not minding:) Yes, I do like puns.:P Me too-I thought Elsa ought to have someone around her that's willing to just treat her like anyone else, not hurting her or fussing over her or anything like that.:) Well, SOMETHING happens, but I don't think it's exactly a 'small dilemma', lol.:P No, I've actually not been camping.:/ I want to, though!**

 **Mukidi-Thank you! Hmm, I'm not sure! I know how the story will go, and we're getting very close to what I would consider the climax. Maybe five? I honestly don't know, lol.:P I will be writing another story after this, but I'm thinking about doing a 'deleted scenes' sort of thing first. I intend for Elsa & co to actually have peace and quiet in Arendelle for the next few years, and I need to plan out how to write an engaging story without crazy stuff happening:) That's fine:)**

 **On to the story!**

 **EDIT 10/7/16: Grammar error fixed near the end of the chapter. Thanks, Mukidi, you are right! (That wasn't an opinion-it was just plain wrong.:P) :) (I HATE grammar errors, lol...:P)**

After everyone had made their fires (Elsa had used an icy lens to start her team's fire, which would have worked easily except that it had started to get cloudy), Kristoff suggested a tree-climbing contest. "Everyone can just nominate one person from their team to participate," he suggested.

Elsa immediately pointed to Anna. "You do it. Anikka's too little, and I'd be useless without using my magic, which isn't fair to everyone else," she said quickly.

Soon the other teams had picked too, and that left Anna, Kiara, and Eugene as the contestants. To Kiara's delight and everyone else's surprise, Kiara easily beat the others' times. "It's from when I had my own electricity magic. I used it to scale things all the time. Guess I'm still good at it," she said, grinning.

"Ice skating next," Eugene said, giving Elsa a pointed look. "Practice for awhile and then improv a short performance thing. Elsa can make us a rink since freezing that pond over completely might be unexpected to the fish. And that's what some of us are having for dinner, I'm sure."

Elsa agreed and quickly made a good-sized 'rink' for them all, but then she stepped back. "I'll sit out," she said quietly.

Rapunzel scowled and poked Eugene in the arm. "Your team needs to quit ganging up on Elsa! Why do you keep suggesting things that are hard or impossible for her?"

"Good grief, Blondie, stop it. She's just like the rest of us! Why are you assuming she can't do stuff?" Eugene asked, raising one eyebrow.

"Because Elsa _can't_ , and I don't want to make her upset because of it," Rapunzel replied stubbornly.

"Sure she can! Come here, Miss Icy." Eugene took Elsa's arm and pulled her onto the ice rink. "Bet she's steadier on her feet on the ice than any of the rest of us, too." Sure enough, Eugene slipped and nearly fell. "Hey, Kristoff, you help her instead. I'll probably just teach her 1,001 Different Ways to Fall and Make Everyone Laugh for a Comedy Act."

Elsa tried her best to stifle a giggle. She allowed Kristoff to take her by the hands, but she looked back at Anna to make sure her little sister was okay with that. "It's fine, Elsa. Positive," Anna called, knowing what Elsa wanted to know. "Kristoff, you had better take really, really good care of my big sister!"

Kristoff nodded and turned his attention back to Elsa. "Uh…first we all need skates," he said awkwardly. "Your cousin's husband is such a comedian. Very…interesting."

Elsa smiled at that. That was quite true in her opinion, too. She quickly created ice skates for everyone else; then Kristoff and herself. Elsa felt herself slip for a split second, but then managed to regain her balance. She felt a slight 'connection' with the ice now, and this made it much easier for her to regain her balance, even though she still felt awkward.

"Elsa, I may not be a very graceful skater, but I've been doing it since I was a kid. I won't let you fall, even though I don't think you will anyway," Kristoff told her. "Just push off and start moving, and don't worry about what it looks like. I guarantee it will look better than what the others are doing. Except your friend Nikoleta, she seems to be pretty good," he added, glancing around the ice rink Elsa had made. "Anyway. Whatever. Just don't overthink it."

"I can't bend my leg," Elsa muttered, mostly to herself. _I feel ridiculous. I'm the Snow Queen; I should be able to ice skate!_

"Use your good leg," Kristoff replied matter-of-factly. "You can use that one for power and just let the weak one come along for the ride. Look, I'll just start skating backwards and pull you along. When you're ready, you start skating by yourself." Without waiting for a reply, Kristoff glanced over his shoulder before starting to move.

Elsa bit her lip, but she began trying what Kristoff had told her to do. "It works!" she exclaimed happily. Before she really realized what was going on, Kristoff let go of her and nudged her toward Anna. "You promised you wouldn't let go!" she yelped indignantly.

"No, I promised I wouldn't let you fall, and you aren't. Go help Anna instead. She needs more help than you do!" Kristoff replied, grinning. That was true. Anna was still flailing her arms and just…generally not actually skating as much as she was _falling_. Elsa, on the other hand, actually seemed _more_ steady on her feet ice skating than she did just walking.

Elsa's happy smile grew bigger as she grabbed Anna by the hand and yanked her to her feet. It crossed her mind that if she'd done that standing on any other surface, she would probably have landed right on her backside. But her magic helped keep her on balance. Not perfectly, but better. "If I can skate, so can you," she told Anna firmly. "I can help you, I think."

"I'll just knock you over," Anna muttered. _Wait a minute…even if I_ do _knock Elsa over, she's not going to care. She's really, really happy right now. She's wanted to go ice skating since, well, since before she got hurt in the first place. Then all that other stuff happened and we never did, and she thought she couldn't, too. And I want to help Elsa feel better about herself. Treating her like she's helpless is_ not _going to help her._ She smiled as Elsa visibly shifted her weight from one foot to the other before skating backwards experimentally, pulling Anna along with her. While Elsa obviously wasn't as 'graceful' on the ice as she had been before her leg was hurt, she seemed completely at ease on the ice now. And she seemed to be actually trying to use her bad leg more and not favor it so much. Usually Elsa avoided putting weight on it at all, and now she was actually gliding on it as she skated about, even though she still couldn't actually push off with it or bend it.

"Linnae just sent me a message," Elsa said now. "She's home, and she's following us here! Also, it's going to rain." She concentrated hard for a moment before adding, "A lot. It's not going to thunderstorm, but it's going to pour."

"What?! Elsa! Why didn't you warn us all earlier? I don't wanna be camping in the rain!" Anna protested. _That stinker!_

"It's just water. I'll just make our icy tent bigger and all nine of us can stay completely dry anyhow," Elsa suggested. "And I think you're supposed to be able to catch fish better when it's raining, too. But I don't think I want to de-hook them or skin them or whatever it is you're supposed to do with whole fresh fish." She frowned. "Does it hurt the fish when you catch them? I don't want to hurt the fish. They didn't do anything."

"Uh…" Anna wasn't sure what to tell her overly sensitive big sister. She had a vague memory of camping with Elsa and their parents when they were little before the accident and they'd gone fishing then, and she didn't remember Elsa making a stink about hurting the fish they caught. But that had been long time ago, and little Elsa probably hadn't been old enough to really think about 'hurting the fish' one way or the other. "You don't have to help fix up and cook the fish, Elsa," Anna said finally.

* * *

Elsa didn't reply as she glanced up at the sky. _It's going to start raining right about….about….now._ Sure enough, it began pouring, and everyone exclaimed in surprise except for Elsa, who had known that was going to happen. She quickly dissolved everyone's ice skates and the rink, figuring correctly that no one wanted to be skating in the rain.

"Elsa, we'll all forfeit the competition to your team if you make that ice shelter of yours bigger and let all of us in," Kristoff offered. He was used to sleeping outside, but it was dumping buckets and there wasn't much fun in camping outdoors for no reason in pouring rain. Sleeping on wet, muddy ground was miserable.

Elsa agreed graciously, but inside she was grinning. She and Anna and Anikka would get to 'win' for no reason. So there. That was kind of immature and childish, but…still. "Okay." She quickly tripled the icy shelter's size and scrambled inside with everyone else right behind her.

Anna frowned as she watched Elsa scoot all the way into a corner holding little Anikka tightly. Everyone else had quickly begun talking all at once, all except Elsa. She didn't look upset, but she was clearly uncomfortable in such a small-ish space with everyone blathering. Anna knelt beside her and just asked, "Are you ok? And be honest."

Elsa gave her a genuine smile and nodded. "I just don't like all the noise. But I'm perfectly fine. I'm not going to freak out. Promise," she said firmly.

"Hey, we're debating who could make it up the North Mountain the fastest. What do you think?" Eugene asked her suddenly. "And y'all shut your traps!" he shouted back to the others. I think Miss Icy's got sensitive ears. So shut up."

"Me. I can beat any of you up the North Mountain." Elsa's blue eyes twinkled at that. The mischievous expression abruptly disappeared as she added, "I'm surprised you noticed I didn't like a lot of noise. Th…thank you."

Eugene shrugged. "Why else would you be sitting in the corner? Well, I guess it could be just because you felt sick or something, but disliking a bunch of noise seemed more likely. And what d'you mean, you can beat any of us up the North Mountain? You're just a girl!"

"Yes, 'just' a girl, but I have my magic. I can make a sled to get up there, fly, ride Linnae…" Elsa grinned before continuing, "And I made it up there in one night _and_ built my ice palace last year. I didn't use my magic, at least not consciously or on purpose. I just…ran. I couldn't do that now, obviously, but I did do it then."

"I think she handles the thin cold air at high elevations better than regular people do," Kristoff put in. "The air up on the North Mountain's summit doesn't make most people sick or anything, but you can feel a difference between there and here. It takes a lot less exertion to get winded. I'm used to it, but I've seen people make themselves sick up at high elevations. I don't know for sure, but I don't think that sort of thing affects Elsa in any way. She didn't _need_ to be super athletic to run up there. She was probably running on adrenaline besides, so that took out the normal tiredness from running that distance…"

Elsa made a face. "Why would my magic make me handle thin air easily? I breathe normally, same as anyone else would." _Well, I hope I do…that would scare me if I didn't._

"Because it's related to cold, that's all," Kristoff told her firmly, sounding very sure of himself. "You breathe air like any other human, Elsa, and I think you know that," he added in a gentler tone. "You just need less of it. It's part of what the trolls call 'required secondary powers'. Like you being immune to cold because you can make ice and snow. I bet you have loads of things you can do that you don't even know about because they're not directly ice and snow."

"If Elsa needs less air than other people, how come she couldn't breathe by herself properly when we first got her home from that cave?" Anna asked, scowling.

Kristoff just sighed. "Anna, you said she breathed in a bunch of smoke when that happened. Smoke derived from fire magic, which is the opposite of hers. That's different. Probably almost like a bad allergic reaction to her. Besides, Elsa still has normal human lungs. She can't breathe smoke! That's dumb."

"Well thanks a lot!" Anna exclaimed slightly huffily. "Elsa does lots of other cool stuff, so I don't see why that couldn't be one of them!"

"May we please talk about something else?" Elsa wasn't sure whether to feel curious about this sort of thing or just wish she was normal like Anna. She didn't want to be 'made different'; she just wanted to be like Anna. And yet she was very curious about what Kristoff was calling 'required secondary powers', too. _I remember_ Jade _told me something similar. She was mean to me, but she was probably right._ She put one hand to her chest and tried to feel the way she breathed naturally, but now that she was actually thinking about it, it wasn't her normal breathing pattern anymore and was a useless experiment. _Of course it didn't help. I just want to know…why I'm…me…_

* * *

 _"_ Elsa, don't be sad. That's gonna be our dinner!" Anikka said a few hours later. It was still raining (although not as hard), and everyone had gone fishing…except for Elsa, who stayed behind with Eliot and Anikka and searched for more worms to use for bait instead.

Somehow Elsa couldn't feel bad for the worms. She was willing to pick them up, but she thought they were gross. She could remember teasing Anna with worms when they'd been very little-Anna would run off screaming, leaving little Elsa pratically rolling with laughter. Anna had also liked chopping up worms with a stick, even though she would not touch them. This Elsa herself would have nothing to do with, because she thought that was mean. What if both halves of the worm were really still alive? "Don't put them on Eliot's head!" Elsa practically yelped at Anikka. "That's _gross_!"

"Eliot pushed I-me. Before. Skating," Anikka explained, poking around in the wet ground for another worm.

Eliot merely returned the gesture, which made Anikka jump to her feet and start squealing. Eliot grinned in satisfaction, and then slowly stood up, concentrating on keeping his balance since it still wasn't perfect. "Anikka, come 'ere," he announced.

Elsa knew the children weren't upset with each other, so she just let them be and went back to looking for more worms herself. Seconds later, she found herself tackled flat on her back with the two little kids giggling happily. _Now I'm all muddy. Anikka, Eliot, why did you do that?!_ She couldn't be mad, though; they were only playing, and they hadn't hurt or scared her or anything. She grabbed a handful of mud and flung it at them. "That's what you get for getting me all muddy," she teased. "Both of you-get off me!"

" _Already_ all muddy!" Anikka replied, but she scrambled off Elsa's tummy and grabbed the ice-bucket of worms and ran over to the others, shouting that she had more bait.

Elsa shook her head as she sat up and tried to brush herself off. She actually thought the whole thing was awfully funny, but she frowned when she noticed Eliot wasn't laughing anymore. "What's wrong? Did I do something wrong?" _No, I didn't. Elsa, that was a stupid comment. You did_ not _do anything wrong._

"No, I…I was jus' thinking. How come s…some people are born different or are perm'nently hurt?"

"Gerda would say it's because it'd be weird if we were all the same," Elsa replied carefully, slightly puzzled by that question. "As for a good logical scientific reason, everyone's genes inside their cells are different. I'm not sure how to explain that, though…"

"But you weren't born with a weak leg. It got hurt and nobody c'n make it better. I don't think that'…s fair. It…like s-someone taking your magic away." Eliot scowled.

"That's impossible, Eliot. I'm stuck with my magic whether I want it or not. I didn't _get_ it from anywhere-it's just part of me. I don't think that's a fair comparison…it's not the same thing. My leg just doesn't work right anymore." Elsa suddenly realized she would have been _much_ more distraught if she was suddenly unable to use her magic. _I still wish I were normal like Anna, but I wouldn't feel…right if I suddenly couldn't use my magic. I wouldn't be…Elsa anymore, whether that's good or bad. I don't like my leg not working right, but I'm still me. I didn't change._ She gave the little boy a lopsided smile and looked at him closely. "I don't think this is what you were thinking about, really. Could you tell me what this is really about? Please?"

Eliot hesitated. "It…jus'…you gave Niko an' me s-so much. I…don't think you give Els…Elsa _anything_. She jus' get…s whatever's left over. And, you didn't get mad at Anikka an' me for knocking you over in the mud. You should've." He paused, then asked, "How'd you get confident enough to be out here without your brace? I'd be really, really s…scared."

Elsa sighed as she glanced at her bad leg. She'd left her brace in the icy tent so it wouldn't get messed up somehow, figuring she could certainly help search for worms without it. She would just end up sitting on muddy ground anyway. "First, we were all already pretty muddy, so I didn't mind. And…I know you and the others aren't going to hurt me if I can't walk. I…I _would_ have been scared too not all that long ago…" _I'm not explaining to Eliot exactly why that frightened me before. Just…no._ Elsa looked up to see Eliot watching her expectantly, so she just said, "Someone hurt me and took it away awhile back. The someone made Anna…not herself temporarily."

"Why would s…someone dare do that to _you_? You're the queen!" Eliot was positively indignant. He also didn't understand why Elsa wouldn't have fought back. She _could_. He knew she could! Elsa had her magic. Still, he could tell Elsa was getting all tense, and he didn't want to make her upset, so he didn't ask anything else. "S…s-sorry."

Elsa's lopsided smile appeared again, although her eyes still looked a bit sad. "It's okay, Eliot, really. You didn't know. Come on, let's find some more worms."

* * *

BEFORE DAWN THE NEXT MORNING…

Elsa had found it strange that Linnae hadn't arrived when she'd said she would, but hadn't really thought much of it beyond that. Now she woke up to Anikka's terrified whispering. "What's going on?" Elsa said sleepily.

Wrong reaction. A loud hiss made her flinch, and she bolted upright. The lanterns had been tipped over, and while the ice-floor of the tent wouldn't burn, all the dry pine needles she and Anikka were sleeping on were. Elsa yelped and instinctively shoved Anikka away from the burning pine needles before dousing the fire, leaving them all in the dark. _What is going on?!_ Elsa felt more than heard a large…something nearby, and she shuddered. Something was wrong. Very, very wrong.

"They're _in_ there!" she heard Eugene's panicked voice. "We have to help!"

Then, "Elsa can douse fires and that's her creature. She can take care of it!"

 _Kristoff, I don't know what's going on,_ Elsa thought. She took a deep breath and reached for Anikka…and grabbed Anna instead, who promptly sat up and began grumbling about it being too early. "Be quiet, Anna," Elsa ordered, and created an icy blue glow in her hand, trying to see what was going on. The fire was out. That meant the 'creature' Kristoff had mentioned had to be Linnae, and either she was being stubborn or something was wrong with her. "Linnae, you are scaring my friends," she called out in a firm voice.

No response.

"Linnae, answer me right now!" Elsa knew she had made Linnae with an independent will, but right now she wished she could force Linnae to answer her. She wished it were daylight; everything was all shadowy and she couldn't see much. _Okay, Linnae's not answering. Fine. I'll just get Anna and Anikka and myself out of here._ With that logic, she whispered her plan to Anna, who just nodded.

Then she heard something falling and practically threw Anikka out of the tent and tried to crawl out herself, Anna right behind her. Someone screamed, and her little makeshift lamp went out. _Something's falling I should do something,_ she thought in a rush. She felt her magic instinctively do something, hopefully something helpful, but she wasn't completely sure what. _Calm down, Elsa._ Elsa finally received a reply from Linnae, but it wasn't what she'd wanted. _You caused trouble and now you pay. Come find your cousin. I will be waiting._ "What?!" Elsa felt something crash on her leg, and everything grew blurry. Something was flashing…no, wait, that was just something hurting her. Where was Anna? "Anna's hurt!" she heard herself scream. That _had_ to be true. Anna had been behind her, and her legs were stuck beneath something heavy and it hurt. So Anna had to be stuck too. Where was Anikka and the others? Were they okay? _Elsa, calm down. Just…calm…down. Linnae is gone. She took Rapunzel. Something or someone poisoned or turned her against us. All right. Now what?_

 _First things first. Get yourself free. See if everyone else is okay. Then assess damage. All right._ Elsa slowly sat up and took a few deep breaths; then tried to slide out from under the…tree? Linnae had knocked over a tree? Okay then. Bad, very bad. This made pain shoot up her legs, and she bit her lip hard. "I'm stuck," she announced.

It was beginning to be light outside, and she could see Eugene and Kristoff trying to move the tree. "Are Anikka and Anna stuck?" she called.

Nikoleta came and knelt beside her. "The tree fell on you, Anna, and Kiara. Kiara just got scratched up by the branches. She's free and perfectly fine. And I think you must've shoved Anikka out of the way, because there's not a scratch on her." She hesitated, squinting at her friend's face in the half light. "Elsa, I think…I think the bad terrorist people poisoned Linnae somehow…"

But Elsa wasn't concerned with that. All she wanted was Anna to be perfectly fine. "Anna? What about Anna? Linnae stole Rapunzel-I know she won't hurt her 'cause she's bait…Anna has to be okay!" Her voice sounded shrill and desperate as she went back to trying to pull herself free. "I crawled out before Anna did! It's my fault if Anna's hurt!"

"No, Elsa, it's not," Nikoleta replied quickly. She wrapped her arms around Elsa and just held her tightly, trying to get her to stop struggling. "Stay still. Everything's gonna be fine. You helped Eliot and me. We'll all help you now." Nikoleta could see tears running down the older girl's cheeks. "Elsa, _please_. If you keep doing that, you're gonna hurt yourself!"

Elsa suddenly pushed Nikoleta away and simply froze the tree solid before using her magic to lift the tree up, much as she had done to dig out the pool back at the castle. She could feel her arms shaking, and she bit her lip before tossing it about a dozen feet away. "Now help Anna," she ordered, her fear for Anna's safety overriding her dislike of giving orders. _I just…picked up…an entire_ tree. _I picked up a tree,_ Elsa thought suddenly. Her own self now free, she tried to go over to Anna, but Nikoleta held her still. "Let me go! I see Anna; I want to help her!" _Elsa, shut up. You sound like a petulant child._

Nikoleta was cowed enough by Elsa's authoritative 'queen' voice to leave her be, but Kristoff was not. He grabbed a blanket before going right behind Elsa and pinning both of her small hands in his own big blanket-covered one, and using the other to hold her still. "You are going to stay put right here, Elsa. The tree fell on you, too. So you have to sit right here until we are _all_ satisfied you aren't hurt. You panicking won't help Anna!" Kristoff was surprised at the fuss Elsa was capable of making without using her magic, but she quickly gave up and sat still. "If you promise to stay put, I'll let go."

Elsa huffed indignantly at that. "I do _not_ need to promise any such thing!"

"Then I'll stay right here." As expected, Elsa made herself deathly cold all over, but Kristoff didn't let go. "Elsa, you are going to give me frostbite through the blanket," he said matter-of-factly.

As he expected, Elsa immediately reverted herself back to normal and gave up. "I…I just want Anna to be safe," she said softly.

"I know you do, but you have to be safe too. Will you stay put now?" Kristoff quickly let go of her when she nodded, and he gave her a reassuring smile. "We'll all be fine. We just might have to get back to Arendelle earlier than we planned, that's all. Could you please make all that soft powdery snow disappear? That'll be much faster than digging through it."

Elsa nodded and looked over at Anna, who was indeed almost completely covered in a thick pile of powdery snow under a broken dome of ice. So that was what her magic had decided to do. Maybe that had been enough to protect Anna from being hurt. _I wish it had made an impenetrable dome of ice instead…_ Elsa was aware that her own leg hurt an awful lot, but she didn't care. She just wanted Anna to be okay. She _needed_ Anna to be okay. So there. _Anna, please be okay…_ Elsa easily dissolved the snow and bit her lip as she watched Anna. She was oblivious to Nikoleta checking her legs to see if she was all right; all she wanted was Anna to hop up and be back to her usual bouncy self.

"I don't _know_ , but I think that one's fine, and-" Nikoleta cut herself off. Her friend was most definitely not listening. "Elsa?"

Elsa turned back to Nikoleta, her expression still worried.

"Elsa, I think that one's just bruised and scratched like what Kiara got. You got your knee twisted funny somehow on your bad leg, though. I don't think you oughta walk on it," Nikoleta explained.

"Okay. What about Anna?" Elsa couldn't shake the feeling that she could have done _something_ different. If only she'd pushed Anna ahead of her… What if Anna was badly hurt? What if she couldn't find Rapunzel and help Linnae? She watched in a daze as Nikoleta gently straightened her bad leg. It still hurt quite a bit, but Anna was still lying there so still and not getting up, and she finally just hid her face in her hands. She wasn't outright crying, but she felt like she wanted to crawl into a hole. _I messed up. I really, really messed up. I could have done something different, and I didn't._

* * *

"Anna's got a busted arm and a bunch of scratches like you and Kiara," Kristoff reported a minute later. "But she's fine, Elsa. That's it. All that snow kept her from being…crushed…" _She probably saved Anna's life…again._ He glanced at Elsa's bad leg and added, "Miss Nikoleta, put that brace on her leg. It needs to stay still until someone who knows what they're doing can check it to be sure. Kiara's got it. And don't let her walk on it."

Elsa didn't complain, but she didn't relax until Nikoleta awkwardly carried her over to Anna. Then she hesitantly touched Anna's arm. "I can…I can put…ice on it," she offered in a small voice. "Anna, I'm so, so sorry, I-"

"Elsa, shut up." Anna opened her eyes and tried to smile, but there were tears in her eyes and she knew Elsa would notice. "Really, just shut up. No apologies. I still don't understand what happened, but I _know_ it wasn't your fault. Now I'll take you up on that ice." She paused before adding, "And I'm not upset or scared, either. It just hurts. D'you understand?"

Elsa slowly nodded and was surprised when Anna slipped her good hand into one of hers. Anna should be furious with her, and she wasn't. What if she hurt Anna's arm worse? What if it was really badly hurt and they couldn't rescue Rapunzel? And Linnae could have hurt all or them badly, and this made Elsa feel responsible. She'd _made_ Linnae, for goodness sakes. _And…and Anna's trying not to cry. She's in pain and it's my fault._

Anna sat up and just curled up against Elsa. Being close to Elsa made her feel better, and it'd probably make Elsa feel better too. "Elsa? Ice, please?"

"O…okay." Elsa bit her lip as she carefully put ice around her little sister's arm, making sure to leave the ice cool to the touch (like the contact crystal bracelets) than cold like her 'default' ice would be. "Is that all right?" _I hate Anna hurting. I want her to be okay…_

"Yeah, perfect!" Anna exclaimed in reply. She smiled, which made Elsa visibly relax, and then nodded and watched with interest as Elsa asked "May I?" before laying her cool hand on Anna's injured arm. Then she felt something tingly and soothing flowing through her arm. _Elsa's magic! What's she doing?_ "Elsa, what'd you do? That, like, really helps. It only hurts a little bit now instead of…awfully," Anna finished lamely. _Why'd I say that? Now Elsa's going to be all upset again._

 _I helped!_ "I don't know, really. I just thought coolness might make it feel better." Elsa honestly wasn't quite sure what exactly she was doing; she was merely channeling cool magic into Anna's arm where it was hurt. She knew full well she couldn't make the bones knit back together like Rapunzel would be able to do, but she could make the area feel better without freezing Anna at least. _I'm…purposely putting magic directly on Anna, and I'm not hurting her._

 _Elsa, stop that. What if you freeze Anna's blood? Or get ice where it's not supposed to be and give her frostbite?_ Elsa jerked her hand away when she heard Anna yelp. "I'm sorry, Anna, I'm sorry!"

Anna had watched Elsa's happy, slightly proud expression that she was helping fade and turn worried, and then she'd felt the equivalent of a brain freeze in her arm, and it _hurt_. "Elsa, you just got yourself all worried and it messed up whatever you were doing," Anna told her firmly, holding her injured arm with her other hand. "I'm _fine_. Will you try again?"

But Elsa shook her head and scooted away, keeping her own hands clasped together close against her chest. She was _not_ going to do that again. "I hurt you again," she whispered. "I _hurt_ you!" She could all too clearly remember her father saying ' _Elsa, what have you done?!'_ mere seconds after the accident when they were little. _I hurt Anna. Again. I messed up. Why couldn't I have at least kept her safe?_

"Nikoleta, Eugene, you go get Sven and bring the wagon as close to here as possible. Kiara, you watch Eliot and Anikka on the way," Kristoff instructed the others. "It's just about a half mile or so away. Back the way we came. We're all going back to the castle." The second he was sure everyone else was following his instructions, he turned his attention back to the two royal sisters.

"She won't even let me touch her," Anna muttered to Kristoff. "She was doing something that made my arm feel way better, and then she got upset and messed up, and now she thinks she hurt me!"

" _Did_ Elsa hurt you?" Kristoff asked, frowning. He trusted Elsa herself, but he didn't trust her magic when she was upset. He'd _seen_ upset Elsa lose control. Kristoff inwardly winced, realizing he had hurt _Elsa_ by asking that question. Elsa's whole body had visibly crumpled further at that, and she had her eyes scrunched shut, tiny snowflakes floating around her.

Anna stared daggers at Kristoff, her blue-green eyes blazing. "Elsa got upset and she messed up! She did _not_ hurt me, so there!" she practically yelled. "You hurt her," Anna said in a quieter tone. "You _hurt_ her. Go away." She felt tears burning in her eyes as she gently touched Elsa's arm again. "Elsa?" This time the older girl didn't pull herself away, although she felt cold to the touch.

"I want t-to go home." Elsa's shaky voice made Anna want to cry all the more. She _sounded_ hurt.

"That's what we're gonna do. Go home. Maybe Gerda will give us some cookies," Anna replied, hoping a lighthearted suggestion might make Elsa smile and feel better again.

"No, I want to go _home_ ," Elsa repeated. _I want to go back to my ice palace. I belong there. I wish I could stay there_ and _have Anna with me and stuff._ She finally lifted her head to meet Anna's eyes as she added, "I _did_ hurt you. You yelped. I know you did. I remembered something Papa told me right after the accident, and I got upset and I messed up. I got worried I'd freeze your blood or get ice in it or something else horrible."

Anna pressed her lips together in anger, wishing she could do something to erase what their dad had done to her big sister. _So Elsa remembered something right after the accident-probably because she was using her magic directly on me-and it made her upset, and that made her "mess up", as she put it._ "Elsa, you didn't hurt me so much as startle me, first thing. Also…" She paused, remembering what they'd talked about just the day before. _I shouldn't give Elsa an actual pep talk. She's supposed to get better by herself._ "Here, Elsa. I won't give you some giant pep talk this time, 'cause you're strong enough to not need it. I'll just say this: _I trust you_. And you get a hug, so there." She put her good arm around Elsa and just held her tightly. "And don't mind Kristoff. He's dumb sometimes. He oughta trust you too."

Elsa slowly relaxed. "No, he shouldn't. I'm glad he doesn't trust me. That means he cares about your safety, as he should. He's supposed to care about your safety way more than my feelings. In fact, I'd be mad at him if he didn't." She still felt responsible for the whole Linnae-going-rogue-and-knocking-trees-on-people thing, but she did feel much better. They would go home and she would fuss over Anna and make sure she was okay and then she would go find Linnae and rescue Rapunzel.

Anna rolled her eyes but said nothing to Elsa's comments. "Kristoff, I want you to carry Elsa so she doesn't have to walk. And be really, really careful with her," she announced in a rather bossy tone of voice.

"I don't think Elsa wants me to do that…" Kristoff knew only too well that Elsa would _not_ want help, and that she would probably think that he should be carrying Anna instead.

Sure enough, Elsa immediately protested that that wasn't appropriate, and that Kristoff ought to carry Anna instead. Anna stood up herself and helped Elsa stand up, making sure the older girl didn't try to put any weight on her bad leg. "Elsa, you hurt your leg. It _might_ be ok to walk on it, but we don't know. So you can't," Anna informed her matter-of-factly. "Can you please-hey, what are you doing?"

Elsa had completely ignored all of that and made a sled big enough for them all to ride in back to where the wagon was. "Problem solved," she said happily. "I'll make a path of snow for us to ride on, and dissolve it once we meet everyone else."

* * *

THAT EVENING…

"Elsa, will you please just sit down? You've been going back and forth between Kiara's room and mine since we got home," Anna scolded. "You were supposed to _take it easy_ and not walk on it too much for awhile. If I want something, someone else can go get it. Not you. Stop…punishing yourself. It was _not_ your fault!"

"But Gerda's making dinner, and-"

"I don't care. I don't have to have books and chocolate and all of these other things you've brought me. You gave me _diamond earrings_ , you stinker! And Kiara is _so_ taking advantage of you. A bunch of scratches do NOT make you stay in bed." Anna frowned as she watched Elsa pick up more of the mess of clothes and other things all over the floor. "Elsa, I like my room messy, so you don't have to clean up anyways. Please just come sit down. I can tell your knee hurts-you're limping."

Elsa sighed and perched herself on the very edge of the bed next to Anna. "I didn't buy those earrings. I've had them for ages, but I can't wear them anyway since I don't have pierced ears. You do, even if you hardly ever wear earrings. And I always limp when I walk-you know that," she said quietly. _I remember Anna went and got her ears pierced the same day we saw those kids with the kittens in the marketplace right after the Great Thaw. I wouldn't do it because I was scared I'd hurt the person doing it or something._

Anna bit her lip, wondering what she should say or do. Elsa looked tense, like she might hop up and do whatever Anna wished on a whim. Anna's arm genuinely did hurt, but Elsa's soothingly-cool-but-not-cold ice made it feel better. She would probably get up if Elsa wasn't adamant that she stay put. Elsa could not do the same for herself, at least not without making it so she couldn't walk at all. _And of course Elsa would rather have it hurt than do whatever that magic thing she did before, 'cause then she wouldn't be able to walk._ "Elsa, there's one thing you can do for me right this second," Anna announced finally. "You can have half the bed and just rest for awhile," she said firmly. "You can read us a book or something if you want to. Like you did when we were little." _There. Now she'll sit still. So there. She's probably going to run off and go look for Rapunzel tomorrow morning, though..._

Elsa happily complied; she liked reading Anna stories, and she hadn't done that for…well, a very long time. She made a face when Anna gently touched her bad leg, asking if she could see. "Looks the same as always," she protested. "Dr. Raske just wrapped up my knee and said I could put my brace back on. He said I'd just twisted it, like a sprain or something. That's why it hurts. There's nothing broken." _I wish I'd managed to keep Anna completely safe, though…_

"And you're supposed to stay off it as much as possible. You said so," Anna pointed out. She put her good arm around Elsa and just held her as tightly as she could. "I don't even know why I wanted to see. I _hate_ seeing you hurt. I really, really hate it. Especially because you don't even care what happens to you. You just…I don't know…I guess I just want to see you happy and safe and well and just…confident. You're better, but _you don't care about Elsa_. You just care about her in the sense that she has to be there to take care of everyone else and that's it. I love you, Elsa, and I wish you could see yourself the way I-and most everyone else-see you." Anna could feel Elsa completely relaxed against her shoulder, her hand clutching Anna's, and somehow that made Anna cry. Elsa was falling asleep. She felt safe just because she was with someone that cared about her. She wasn't all tense, either; she seemed completely relaxed and at ease.

"Anna…don' cry," Elsa said sleepily. "Safe at…home. Castle home for Anna…ice palace home…for Elsa." _Wait a minute. What did I just say?_ Elsa jerked back completely awake, but she stayed leaning against her little sister's shoulder. _Don't say anything else stupid, Elsa._

Anna scowled, thinking about what Elsa had said. "The castle is your home, too. We _love_ you. You still want to live all alone way up on the North Mountain's summit? It's lonely up there! And cold, and dangerous…and…I don't know. Your ice palace is beautiful, but you can't _live_ there!"

Elsa pulled away and just held out her signature snowflake hovering over one hand, and gave Anna a sad smile. "Anna, the castle is my home in the sense that's where I live. But…I don't know how to explain it. I'm not…not like you or anyone else. _That's_ me," she said softly, holding the intricate snowflake out to Anna. "I'm the Snow Queen, and she doesn't truly belong. She can't, no matter what she does. I feel like if I didn't have ice powers, Elsa would no longer have her own identity somehow. She's just this young, emotionally damaged ice mage that doesn't fit anywhere. When I'm on the North Mountain's summit, I feel… _normal_ somehow. I fit there. Do you remember when I sang that song for you awhile back?"

Anna nodded.

"Well, it sounds absolutely ridiculous, but _I am one with the wind and sky_ is just…accurate. And you called my ice palace beautiful, but that it was cold and dangerous up there? That's _me_ , Anna. I'm immune to cold; my magic can make beautiful things, but I'll always have the capability of being dangerous or being out of control, just like winter weather can be naturally all of those things. I don't like being able to freeze people to death. I don't like being able to make substances that are stronger than steel. I can _make life,_ Anna. There's something wrong with that. Linnae could have killed us." Elsa paused as she struggled to verbalize to Anna what she barely knew how to explain even to herself.

"Linnae was poisoned or something. She didn't do that of her own accord, I know she didn't," Anna said firmly.

"That's not the point. Anna, I created a live dragon. I'm just a girl, not a…a goddess or a force of nature. I shouldn't be able to do that! It scares me. I _should_ be kept away from normal humans-I'm like a…an explosive about to go off any moment. It's like…like inside I'm just a little girl, and physically I'm…not," Elsa finished lamely, unable to come up with a word or phrase that explained what she meant.

"Elsa, I still just see my sweet big sister, no matter what crazy things she can do," Anna said firmly. "I actually kinda get what you're saying, and I can't deny that you _are_ different, but I just plain don't care. You being an ice mage doesn't make me love you any more or less than I would if you didn't have powers at all." She thought for a moment before adding, "Is this part of the reason why you said you still feel lonely at night sometimes? 'Cause you think you don't 'belong'?"

"I'm not sure, Anna. I thought I was okay with being 'different' now, but what happened this morning reminds me otherwise. That it's _not_ okay. 'Different' isn't the problem-it's just what that 'different' is that's the problem. The problem isn't that I have platinum hair or too-pale skin or a bad leg. It's not even my magic in of itself. It's just _how strong_ my magic really is." Elsa paused again, mulling over what she was saying. _My problem really isn't that I'm weird or abnormal or different! I actually…believe that. Elsa, that's a good thing!_ "I know my magic does have limits, but those limits are so…ridiculous that it still scares me. I still just wish I…I was normal like you."

Anna wasn't sure what to say. She loved Elsa just like she was, ridiculously powerful ice magic and all. It was hard for her to see anything else but just her sweet big sister with the hypersensitive feelings, who would build snowmen with her and go ice skating and liked playing jokes sometimes. Elsa was just…Elsa. Not some weird icy force-of-nature goddess that could create life. And yet for the first time she genuinely understood what had made Elsa feel so worried and 'different'. _Elsa's accepted that she's different and doesn't mind that. She just doesn't like being so crazy-powerful. That's understandable._ "You know, Elsa…you told me you felt like Someone told you your magic was a gift last Christmas when you were so sick. It's kind of weird and far-fetched, but maybe God just decided you could be trusted with that much power and that you wouldn't take advantage of it?" she suggested. "'Cause most people would love to have the scale of power you do. And they'd take advantage of it, too."

Elsa sighed and shrugged. "I don't know. It's just… _why?!_ If I were God, I wouldn't give that much power to _any_ one person. It's too dangerous. Certainly not some young girl like me, anyways, that's half-scared of her own shadow all the time. I'm exaggerating, but still. Why wouldn't there be a lot more ice mages, just with much more limited abilities?" _I don't get it._

"Those same qualities that you're saying make you incapable of handling all those abilities are exactly what make you the perfect person to have them," Anna pointed out. She frowned; Elsa was staring down at her hands resting in her lap, her expression confused. Anna touched Elsa's hand gently and gave it a squeeze. "Y'know, Elsa, I actually get what you're saying about yourself for once, but I still don't agree. You're probably the only person in the world that's actually had as much power as you do and didn't/hasn't abused it."

"Are you saying it's a _good_ thing I panic sometimes?" _I don't understand, Anna. I just don't._ Elsa didn't pull her hand away from Anna's, but she couldn't help frowning at the difference in their skin coloring. Anna's hand was light, but it looked slightly tanned and rosy. Elsa's own hand was still the same icy-pale color just like always, with the very, very slight blueish lavender tinge. She hated it.

"No, just that you being all sensitive and caring and stuff means you don't abuse your authority or your magic, that's all. And quit staring daggers at your hand. That's not going to make it darker," Anna teased, putting her good arm back around Elsa's shoulders.

"I know. I don't have to like it." Elsa just gave Anna a lopsided smile again.

* * *

IN WESELTON…

"This isn't Elsa's fault!" Rapunzel yelled.

"Well, calm that thing down!" Agdar shouted back. Linnae was flying back and forth, every so often spewing ice at a rooftop.

"I was lucky to get onto Linnae's back instead of in her mouth!" Rapunzel shouted. "I just want you to leave Elsa be! It's not her fault!"

"It's her creature! She should have dissolved it! I see why that duke wanted to get rid of her if her creature can cause this much of a mess!"

Linnae growled and landed on the ground and began marching straight towards a very angry Agdar. _You do not tell Elsa to dissolve me. That is killing. And you do not imply that Elsa should have been eliminated._

 _Wait. I dropped a tree on her. Why did I do that?_

Rapunzel screamed, knowing exactly what Linnae wanted to do. She wanted to freeze Agdar. Rapunzel remembered Elsa telling her she could send telepathic messages to Linnae. Maybe she could do that now. _Linnae. Calm down. You love Elsa and her family. Stop this. Please._

Linnae huffed, but momentarily stopped in her tracks.

 **A/N: Annddd...that happened. :P**

 **You actually can start a fire with an ice lens like Elsa did, but it has to be perfectly clear ice and exactly the right shape. It's pretty cool-look it up! :)**

 **One thing I wanted to show with what Elsa tried to explain to Anna near the end of this chapter is that she really is mostly okay with being different at this point. She just feels uncomfortable knowing just _how much_ power she really has. She has created independent, intelligent live creatures. She knows her magic has limits, but they're so insanely strong that it still unnerves her. She's _stopped a bomb;_ she can fly; there are facets to her magic she doesn't even know about. And Anna actually understands why Elsa's uncomfortable with that-she just doesn't care that her sister has force-of-nature abilities. :)**

 **Next chapter coming soon! (In which I will resolve that cliffhanger...:))**


	33. Chapter 33

_**A/N:**_ **Thanks to everyone who's followed/favorited and/or is reading but not reviewing:)**

 **Love Elsa a lot-YW! I've been busy, but I'll try to get one up soon.**

 **FluffyKitten-More about Linnae soon:) Kristoff is a little too blunt sometimes...he does know Elsa is sensitive, but as he does sincerely trust her (but not her magic when she's upset), he wanted to make sure Anna was okay. Elsa IS a little hypersensitive sometimes.:P That question "how strong is Elsa really?" is exactly why mulling it over was bothering Elsa. She doesn't feel comfortable with that scale of power, and she's right-it's a bit ridiculous. She's kind of really overpowered in some ways; the only thing that keeps that from happening is her own feelings about it (you know, like she doesn't even _want_ that much power, for one thing). Like Anna told her, Elsa is really one of the very few people that it is okay to give that much power to, because she won't abuse it.**

 **Elsa Tomago-I PMed you, so I won't make you reread the same thing here:)**

 **raven678-Thank you:) Well, Elsa's still just a regular girl, magic or not. I thought she should have some fun with the others for a little while.:) Agdar was frightened and started saying things he shouldn't. Don't forget he had Linnae threatening him at that point.:P And yes, if Elsa finds out, she's going to be upset...**

 **Mukidi-Error fixed! Thanks for pointing it out-I HATE grammar errors, lol :)**

 **Olivia O'Neil-Thank you:)**

 **IndyGirl89-More explanation in this chapter:)**

 **Elsa and Ingrid/Thora and Thea-I probably just hadn't gotten to your letter yet, I'm guessing...**

 **On to the story! Get read for some drama with a happy ending coming soon:)**

 _Elsa, I need help! Now!_ Elsa nearly jumped out of her skin when she received a desperate message from Linnae. She was still talking to Anna, mulling over the whole powers thing, but now she figuratively froze. What if Linnae was trying to trick her somehow? What if the bad terrorist people had some modern technology thing that had figured out how Linnae could communicate with natural mages and that was why Linnae had taken Rapunzel? Elsa replied carefully. If it really was Linnae and she needed help, then it would be fine; if not, well then…she didn't think too hard about that. _Linnae, you've been poisoned in some way. What exactly is wrong?_

 _Something is eating my head. I am not thinking right. Take it out, pl-Elsa, I hate you. NO, THE BAD HUMANS HATE YOU! It is a drug pill thing I think it is wearing off by now but I need help until it does I am in Weselton Rapunzel is fine but I am worried I may hurt her._ Linnae's message was oddly garbled-sounding, and seemed to be extremely rushed.

 _Linnae, I won't reach you quickly enough, most likely. Just keep messaging me. I'm coming._ Elsa quickly got up and limped towards the door to Anna's room. "Anna, I have to go. Linnae needs help. I need more information, but…I've got to go. I'm sorry." She gave her little sister a reassuring smile when Anna gave her a worried look. "I'll be fine. I pr…" _I can't promise that._

Anna's expression just grew more worried, and she hopped out of bed and ran over to Elsa despite her protests. "You can't even promise me you'll be fine. I gotta come with you," she said firmly. "I _have_ to."

Elsa drew herself up to her full height and looked Anna right in the eyes. "And I say _no,_ absolutely not," she said, matching Anna's firm tone and then some. "I'll take you downstairs and make you sit in the kitchen with Gerda babysitting you if I have to. You are not coming. I won't have you be hurt because of me again." Her blue eyes went wide in horror when she heard Linnae's next message.

 _I froze that Agdar. He was being mean,_ Linnae informed her in a matter-of-fact, slightly gleeful tone.

" _LINNAE!"_ Elsa screeched impulsively, forgetting that the dragon couldn't actually hear her that way. She was absolutely horrified, and tears began trickling down her cheeks. _Linnae, how could you?! What did you_ do?! _Is Papa…alive?_

 _No, I do not think so. I do not care. Elsa, are you coming? I miss you,_ Linnae replied.

What worried Elsa the most was the she was fairly certain that whatever had happened had merely prodded Linnae to do something she had been wanting to do anyway. Linnae's last reply had honestly sounded like Linnae's normal self, not her poisoned self or the desperate call for help Elsa had just received a minute ago. Elsa looked down at her hands, her body shaking all over. _I made Linnae. I killed Papa,_ she thought absently. "I killed Papa," she whispered almost inaudibly. "I killed Papa!"

Anna put her good hand on her hip and frowned. She easily put the pieces together. "Linnae froze Dad and you think it's your fault?" she asked. "Well, it's _not_!"

Elsa glanced up at her and just fled.

* * *

TEN MINUTES LATER…

"Elsa, we're coming in. Kai got the hinges off your door," Anna called. Normally she wouldn't have barged into Elsa's room that quickly, but firstly, Elsa had actually locked her door (which she never did anymore); and secondly, she wouldn't reply at all. Anna was terrified her big sister might be trying to hurt herself somehow if she genuinely believed she was responsible for killing someone…especially their father. She still wasn't sure of all the details of what exactly had happened in the first place.

Anna screamed when she saw what Elsa was doing. She'd managed to get her fireplace going and appeared to be about to actually touch the fire. "Elsa, _no_!"

Kai just ran over to her and grabbed her arms, pulling her away from the flames. "Put the fire out," he said quietly to Anna, his voice strained. To his surprise, Elsa didn't seem to be struggling to get away, but there were snowflakes floating motionlessly around her and she was shaking. "Miss Elsa, what is the meaning of this?!" Kai demanded. "We can't trust you not to purposely harm yourself?"

" _I killed Papa!_ " Elsa couldn't bring herself to meet Kai's eyes. She could feel his concerned gaze on her, and that just made her feel worse. _Linnae said she froze Papa. I made Linnae. She's an extension of my emotions, even though she's an independent creature. That makes it my fault._

"Your sister told me what she thinks happened. If that's true-that Linnae _did_ do that-it isn't your fault," Kai said, struggling to remain calm. _If that's true, what will happen to Elsa? She may not be able to reconcile herself with that. She already blames herself for everything._ He frowned as he looked at Elsa's hands. While he'd managed to get her away from the fire before it had hurt her in any way, her wrists looked bruised and swollen. "What did you try to do, Miss Elsa?" he asked gently.

"I killed Papa," Elsa repeated, although she sounded slightly calmer now. Tears continued running down her cheeks, and she tried to pull away, but Kai wouldn't let go and remained holding her firmly.

"No, we _think_ Linnae did. _You_ didn't do any such thing. We aren't even sure what happened," Kai corrected. "What were you trying to do, Miss Elsa?" he asked again.

Elsa's expression crumpled in pain. _I don't know how to explain it._ "Break the m-magic…c-connection flow," she mumbled. "So I w-wouldn't…do…it…again." _That sounds ridiculous. It makes sense, but the magic would just find some other way to get out. You should know that, Elsa. You should know that only too well._

Kai sighed and shook his head. "What did you do, try to break something, fail, and then think burning yourself was a better idea? Miss Elsa…" _What am I supposed to tell her? The only good thing is that she didn't cause more damage before Anna asked me to get into her room._

Anna was incredulous despite being completely unsurprised. _That figures._ "Elsa, you promised you wouldn't do things like that," she said softly.

Elsa immediately shook her head. "I promised I wouldn't…kill myself. Not…not hurt-" She cut herself off when she felt something soft and warm draped around her. "What…why…?"

Anna knelt on the floor and just touched Elsa's hand; then jerked away when Elsa winced. _Oh, Elsa, what did you do to yourself?_ "Elsa, we need more information-a _lot_ more information-before having any reason to freak out and stuff. Even if it's true, it's NOT your fault. Please don't try to hurt yourself any more than you already did. You hurt other people when you do that, not just yourself." She paused before adding, "Even if you _had_ outright killed someone yourself, I'd still love you all the same. Because I know you plenty well enough to know that it either wouldn't be your fault or it was self-defense or something like that. Also, Elsa, you were kind enough to give Linnae a free will to do as she chooses. If she _did_ choose to do something bad, that isn't your fault. It's hers. You didn't do anything wrong at all."

Elsa finally looked up to meet Anna's eyes and let her aching hands relax in her lap. _Are you sure?_

Kai gently lifted Elsa and carried her to bed. "Miss Anna, please stay with your sister for now. I'll go get Gerda so she can take care of Miss Elsa and get you both some dinner."

* * *

Elsa immediately told Gerda she didn't want dinner and that she was fine, but Anna wouldn't listen. "Gerda, she did something to her wrists, I don't know what. Elsa's being weird and she's all upset," she said unapologetically.

Gerda took care of Elsa without a word and then just sat down beside her. "Miss Anna, go get your own dinner downstairs in the dining hall. I'll stay with your sister until you come back." Anna hesitated, but she did trust Gerda to take care of Elsa, so she complied. The second Anna was gone, Gerda turned her attention back to Elsa, who was now curled up on her side, tears still filling her eyes even though she was no longer shaking and crying. Rather than say anything, Gerda merely put Elsa's two birthday dolls from Anna in Elsa's arms and just stroked Elsa's hair gently. _If something really did happen to Agdar, Elsa is_ not _going to be ok. She loves her daddy so much, even after what he did to her. Elsa seems like a much more in control version of the way she seemed after we got the "news" that her parents were lost at sea when she was eighteen. She jumped to hurting herself again, although it wasn't with the same intent this time, I know. At least she had a bit of reasoning behind what she did this time-she wanted to break her magic flow connection in her hands…_

After a few minutes, Elsa finally said, "I _love_ Papa, even if he still likes Anna better."

Gerda said nothing, but lifted Elsa in her arms and held her close. _She needs a chance to just…talk. Someone to just listen to her. I can do that._

"Papa would be mad if he knew I was crying."

Gerda frowned. "It's fine to cry if you need to, Miss Elsa," she said firmly.

"What's Mama going to do when she realizes what happened? She'll _hate_ me," Elsa said softly, her mind clearly having moved on from the crying thing. "I'd understand that, but…" She looked down at her sore wrists and just closed her eyes. Gerda had gently wrapped them up for her, and now she felt like they were mocking her. They were hurt, but she could still channel her magic fairly easily. She'd made Gerda and Kai and Anna all worried about her. Now they wouldn't want to leave her alone again, because they'd worry that she might try to hurt herself again. _I couldn't even bring myself to touch the fire. Kai didn't even need to pull me away from it. I couldn't do it._ "I was s-scared, and I couldn't put my hand in the fire," she whispered, her voice cracking.

"Because of the cave incident?" Gerda asked, fairly certain but wanting to clarify.

Elsa nodded and held her birthday dolls from Anna as tightly as she could, tears slowly spilling down her cheeks again. "It was like I didn't really w-want to hurt Elsa again, but I had to. She d-deserved it. I…I don't understand…" _That's the truth. I really, really don't understand._ She abruptly jerked away from Gerda and sat up straight, her blue eyes determined. _Wait a minute…_ "Gerda, Linnae said she _froze_ Papa. My…my magic…maybe I can undo what she did. I've got to try! I…I have to get to Weselton _right now_!"

"Miss Elsa, that's a nice idea, but how are you going to get there quickly? And someone needs to go with you. That's Weselton you're talking about, not Arendelle or Corona. Arendelle may have control over it, but the people there don't know you-you've never been there." Gerda hesitated before continuing, not wanting to make Elsa all upset all over again. "We don't have any way of knowing how magic-friendly they are after the way that former duke was acting. He could have spread those views to the public."

 _And Papa wouldn't help, and neither would whatever damage Linnae has caused. I'd be anti-magic too._ Elsa figuratively froze and bit her lip. "That is no matter. I have to try to help Papa," she said firmly. She looked down at herself and her ice-dress and then back at Gerda, all traces of the distraught girl from just a few minutes ago gone. _I can help Papa; I know I can. If my stupid magic is so strong, I can certainly reverse whatever Linnae did. So there._ Her blue eyes twinkled, and she just looked determined. "Gerda, I think I know just what to do. But I need your help, and Eugene's. You need to make me look like a servant girl-I can't go there as myself; I have to be invisible. And Eugene used to be a thief. I'll bet he's great at coming up with a believable scheme that will actually work. Besides, I'm sure he wants to see Rapunzel safe..."

* * *

Eugene was only too eager to help. "This'll be a cinch. First, you don't need to worry about a suitable dress. Blondie brought an outfit that'd be perfect. She's used it to blend in and not be recognized loads of times. She won't mind if you borrow it. You'll just need shoes, since she still hates them for whatever reason."

"I'll volunteer some shoes!" Anna exclaimed. She'd been delighted to come back to Elsa's room to find a much, much more upbeat Elsa than she'd seen a little while ago. She ran to her room and came back with some plain black shoes. "See if they fit, Elsa!"

They did.

Elsa quickly slipped the grayish-tan dress on in her bathroom and came back a minute later. "I don't look normal; I look _sick_ ," she pointed out. This was true.

"Do you have a light cloak or blanket or something?" Eugene asked Anna.

Anna thought for a second and then ran off and was back in seconds. "Try this, Elsa. It's kinda faded, but I used to wear it a lot…before the Great Thaw." She draped the brown cloak around her sister's shoulders and then just hugged her tightly with her good arm. "Elsa, I'm _so_ glad you're better," Anna whispered in Elsa's ear quietly enough that only Elsa could hear her.

Gerda frowned. "She can't wear that combination. She'll roast! It's summertime," she said firmly. "And Miss Elsa is right-she looks ill. What are you trying to do, young man?"

Eugene just crossed his arms. "We have to get her onto the estate or castle or wherever in Weselton where her parents live, and we don't know what kind of questions or guards there will be. At first glance, Miss Icy will just blend in with everyone else as long as she keeps her hood up. That cloak is light enough she can get away with it without looking like she's dressed in winter clothes. If somebody starts being suspicious, they'll see her up close and feel bad for being suspicious since she looks sick. Oldest trick in the book," he said matter-of-factly.

"What if someone asks questions?" Elsa asked worriedly. "I still look like…me, and I sound like my usual self, too…"

"You really don't, Miss Icy. Go look in the mirror. We easily recognize you, but the people there would be looking for the Snow Queen, not a commoner. It'll be easy," Eugene told her confidently.

"What if someone asks questions?" Elsa repeated. _What if I mess things up?_

"You're my little sister, and we're trying to get help because you've been sick," Eugene answered instantly. "Simple. A bit of acting from you, and we're in."

Elsa looked down at her bandaged wrists and made a face. "This?" she asked hesitantly, her cheeks pink in embarrassment as she held up her hands.

"You fell down some steps and landed on them," Eugene answered easily. "Miss Icy, it's either this or you can be a boy who's been swiping fruit from my vendor's cart. I don't think that'll work so well. You'd make a pretty lousy boy."

This finally made Elsa laugh, and both Gerda and Anna just scowled at him. "What? She _would_ make a lousy boy," Eugene said unapologetically.

"Well, I should hope so," Gerda said a bit huffily. "Such an idea! Miss Elsa is a girl, and a pretty one at that. I'll not have any girl I take care of gallivanting off in boy's clothes, even if it's for a good reason. My goodness."

Elsa thought she would rather do that than play a 'damsel in distress' character if her leg wasn't messed up, but she didn't say so. She glanced at Anna, who looked back at Elsa like they were sharing a secret. _Wait…Anna_ was _wearing pants once! When she disguised herself as a modern American girl. That's not really the same thing, though-those were meant to be girl clothes anyway._ Elsa honestly didn't see anything particularly wrong with wearing pants, but she herself didn't think she would like it. She liked her dresses, thank you very much. "I don't think it matters anyway. I would think you were a very lousy runner if you couldn't catch a thief that couldn't run."

Eugene shrugged. "I pulled cons with a kid with a lame leg a lot when I was about eleven or twelve or so. Used it to distract shopkeepers or vendors or got them to give him stuff. He was also the best tree climber you ever saw, too."

"What happened to him?" Elsa asked curiously, half afraid of hearing the answer.

"He got adopted and his new parents wouldn't let me be friends with him anymore," Eugene said flatly.

Elsa just bit her lip, unsure what to say to that. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have asked…"

"Not your fault," Eugene said briskly. "Now let's get going."

* * *

Elsa remembered the crystal Kristoff had used to bring Rapunzel and Eugene to Arendelle originally, and luckily Kristoff still had it with him. She and Eugene would use that to get to Weselton. "Anna, don't leave the castle grounds 'til I'm back, please," Elsa said firmly.

Anna only put her good arm around Elsa and hugged her tightly. "Elsa…just promise me you won't get all crazy upset like you did earlier if things don't go right," she whispered. "You scared me so bad." _You weren't supposed to revert back to do something horrible like that, Elsa. I thought you were all better as far as that goes…_ She gently touched her sister's hand and added, "Are you sure you can use your magic with your wrists like that without hurting yourself?"

Elsa scrunched her eyes shut and just sighed. _I can't promise you that._ "They're just sore. It'll be fine; I can feel it," she said honestly. Elsa held out her signature snowflake and then dissolved it. "See, it's fine."

"You didn't answer my question."

Gerda gave Elsa's arm a reassuring squeeze. "She probably doesn't feel she can promise that, princess," she said quietly to Anna. "Don't make her. Miss Elsa will have Mr. Fitzherbert and your cousin with her. They'll make sure she's all right." Gerda turned Elsa to face her and looked her straight in the eyes. "I do want you to promise you'll do your very best not to hurt yourself in any way. Not that you absolutely won't. That you'll do your very best not to. Can you do that?"

Elsa quickly nodded and managed to give Gerda a genuine smile. _I can promise that._

* * *

"Mrs. Grieg, will you please calm down!" Eugene shouted less than five minutes later. With the power crystal, it had been a simple matter for him and Elsa to get to Weselton in seconds. But now he almost wished he hadn't come. Rapunzel seemed fine, if shaken, but Elsa's mother was completely hysterical, and nothing he said would calm her down. It was like seeing Elsa had set Idun off or something.

Poor Elsa retreated behind Eugene and just kept her gaze on the floor. She felt like she deserved her mother's frightened ranting, but it still hurt. _I promised Anna and Gerda I would do my best not to do anything. I promised Anna and Gerda I would do my best not to do anything. Elsa, just stay calm. You can't have any of the staff realize who you are should they come in here._

Rapunzel left her aunt's side and just came up to Elsa. "I'm just helping Auntie Idun until she has calmed down," she said loudly. "I hear you've been sick but are looking for some light work?" Then, in a hurried whisper, "Elsa, Linnae's asleep. Thought it'd take care of the problem 'til we can figure out what to do. I think you can help your dad."

Elsa just nodded, not trusting herself to say anything. _I have to be able to help Papa. I have to._ "Where's…Papa?" she whispered.

"You can help with some mending upstairs," Rapunzel said in her louder voice again, but gave Elsa a meaningful look. _Come on, Elsa. I think it's ok to talk aloud, but I don't know and I'm not risking anything._

Elsa nodded and followed her cousin toward the stairs, still keeping her eyes down. She sighed as she started up the stairs after Rapunzel. _I hate stairs._

"Hey, who's that? What's wrong with her leg?" a new voice asked.

Rapunzel instantly replied in her best lofty tone, "I've hired a new servant girl. She says she's the best seamstress in her family. I have never heard of someone sewing with their feet, thank you very much. Go mind your own business, sir." The second he was gone, she whispered to Elsa, "Just the stupid guy that has pretty much the equal of Kai's job in Arendelle. Has a big bloated head, too. Not nice like Kai."

"I can't sew!" was all Elsa said worriedly, although she couldn't deny that Rapunzel's comment about sewing with your feet was rather funny.

"So? I just wanted him to get lost." Rapunzel glanced around before putting one arm around her cousin to help her up the rest of the stairs. "Elsa, what happened to you?" she asked quietly, frowning at Elsa's bandaged wrists. Elsa stiffened, and Rapunzel just gave her a comforting squeeze. "Never mind. We'll just go in…here and fix you up," she said, tugging Elsa into the room at the top of the stairs. There was just mismatched furniture and a shelf of books, almost like a tiny library of sorts. Rapunzel quickly shut the door behind them, and Elsa finally relaxed. "Give me your hands, Elsa. Please."

Soon Elsa's wrists were all healed, and her knee that had been hurt from the tree falling on her was all better too. Rapunzel hadn't even known about that, and it was still all better. Elsa smiled a bit and gave her cousin a hug. "Thank you. I…it feels much better," she said softly.

"You're welcome. Now come on. Let's go help your father. I know you can do it."

* * *

"We put him in his own suite, so's not to be attracting loads of negative attention and stuff," Rapunzel explained. She paused right outside the door. "Elsa… _please_ don't freak out. He doesn't look…alive. I just thought you might be able to help since it was ice, and-"

"If I completely panic, I want you to knock me out," Elsa interrupted earnestly, her blue eyes begging for Rapunzel to understand. "I…I can't make Mama and Papa or myself look any worse than I already did. Please. Don't worry about hurting me-you can always just fix that. Just knock me out, and don't let me wake up if you think I'll still be all…panicky. _Please_."

Rapunzel just slipped her hand into Elsa's and nodded. "I can do that. Only 'cause I can make your head feel better, though. Otherwise I'd say no way." She pushed the door open, but let Elsa stay behind her. "You probably gotta stay calm if you're going to help, so…just think about something else," she told Elsa.

Elsa kept holding her cousin's hand tightly as she followed Rapunzel into the room. _Anna thawed. That means Papa can thaw too, right?_ She wouldn't look at her father, but she just touched his icy hand hesitantly, unsure what she was supposed to do exactly. Anna had thawed _herself_. Linnae had done this all in one moment, so her daddy wouldn't have had a chance to do anything to stop it. What if she _couldn't_ do anything? _I should try before freaking out,_ Elsa reminded herself. She took a deep breath before trying to dissolve the ice like she would any other, concentrating on how much she loved her father in the hopes that that might help. _Come on, Elsa, you can do this. Help Papa._

Her face lit up when she felt Agdar's hand move under hers, and she opened her eyes and let out an excited squeal. Elsa impulsively flung herself into her father's arms and just hugged him tightly. "Papa's okay, he's okay!" she said happily. _Papa's not…dead. I helped him. I still don't know if it was my fault or not, but Papa's okay._

"Um, Elsa…" Rapunzel said hesitantly. "Elsa, why don't you come over here?" she suggested, tugging on her cousin's arm. _Uncle Agdar looks kind of mad. And scared. He's not going to be happy with Elsa at all._ She wanted to get Elsa away from him before he made her upset somehow. Elsa was so happy she had managed to help her father, but Rapunzel was absolutely sure he wouldn't be so happy with Elsa in return.

Elsa felt herself shoved away, and she flinched when something slapped her sharply. Elsa's blue eyes immediately began filling with tears when she realized what had happened. "Papa? I…I just wanted t-to help, and…" _Papa never did that before. He must be really, really mad at me. I…I want to go home. Of course Papa's mad at me. Why wouldn't he be?_

" _Don't_ yell at Elsa," Rapunzel ordered. "Just don't. We don't need a giant scene. She didn't do anything wrong. And don't you dare hit her again, or I'll…I'll sic Linnae on you," she threatened. Rapunzel knew quite well that she didn't really look the least bit threatening, but she kept her arms around her cousin protectively and didn't back down. _Elsa tried to do something good, and her own father slapped her for it. What on earth?! I don't get it. And Elsa said he never did that to her. Either this is the first time, or she was fibbing, or she genuinely didn't remember._ "She just healed you! I couldn't do it, because it was magic-based, but Elsa could. Maybe you could tell her thank-you or something instead."

"Her dragon nearly killed multiple people, and it caused structural damage on several buildings. She's making herself and me look bad! Everyone knows where a live dragon had to have come from. And-" Agdar abruptly cut himself off when he felt a wave of cold go through his chest. "Elsa, I don't think you got rid of all of the ice…" he said slowly.

Elsa's blue eyes went wide as she realized just what the problem was. _I literally_ can't _heal Papa entirely…_ "Only an act of true love can thaw a frozen heart," she said softly, mostly to herself. "Papa…I can't get rid of the last bit. _You_ have to," Elsa added hesitantly.

"What kind of nonsense is that? I don't have…magic like you do," Agdar pointed out.

"Anna…last summer, when I hurt Anna again and hit her in the heart by accident, _she_ thawed herself. Pabbie said 'only an act of true love will thaw a frozen heart'," Elsa explained, trying her best not to cry. _I should have realized this… And since the ice is already in Papa's heart, it'll take less time for him to freeze again._

"Didn't you technically just do that by thawing the rest of the ice?" Agdar asked.

Rapunzel frowned. "Uncle Agdar, Elsa means YOU have to do the act of true love. It has to be done by the person with the frozen heart," she explained. "Elsa can't do it." _You could start by giving Elsa an apology and actually loving her like you should…_

"It's her ice. She should be able to get rid of it."

"Maybe if I were an ice master, but I'm not," Elsa said shakily. "Papa, I did the best I could, and it wasn't enough." _Just like when I was little…_ "I'm sorry. I'm really, really sorry." She hung her head, her blue eyes wet with tears. She knew the 'act of true love' didn't have to be for her, like Anna had done, but she had no idea just how big it had to be. _Maybe Papa could just give Mama a hug or something?_ "Rapunzel, could you go get Mama? Maybe it'll count if Papa gives her a hug."

Rapunzel hesitated, not wanting to leave Elsa alone with her father. " _Don't_ hurt her," she ordered sharply, and gave Elsa's arm a reassuring squeeze before leaving the room.

* * *

Agdar began regretting what he had done as he watched Elsa. She wasn't losing control, but she was clearly upset, her hands held close to her chest. And the red mark on her cheek reminded him of the other time he'd slapped her in the face, back when she was fourteen or so-he couldn't remember exactly. But Elsa had made the same shocked expression then as she'd done a minute ago. _Elsa did nothing wrong. Her stupid dragon scared me, but she didn't do anything wrong. She came here to_ help _someone she should've been glad was gone, and all I did was shove her away. Again._ "Elsa, I apologize for hitting you like that," he said finally.

"You never did that to me before, Papa," Elsa whispered. "Not even…before. What d-did I do wrong?"

Agdar simply got up and awkwardly hugged her close. Elsa's body was cold, and she was shaking slightly all over. "Nothing, Elsa. You didn't do anything wrong. You just scared me." _What does Elsa mean I never did that to her before? Does she genuinely not remember?_

"Can I fix it?" Elsa asked hopefully. She thought about her reaction earlier when Linnae had 'told' her what she'd done to Elsa's father. Would her daddy like her better if she could not channel her magic through her hands? _Yes, he would,_ she thought sadly. _Because then I wouldn't be able to hurt him._ She balled her hands into fists, her nails digging into her palms. "Papa, I actually understand why you're still scared of me, but…but can you still like me okay? Please?"

 _Elsa_ still _wants my approval._ Agdar wasn't sure what to say. What _could_ he say that was honest and wouldn't hurt her? He genuinely cared about Elsa and wanted her to be happy, but if he was honest with himself, he still loved Anna more. Elsa was different. She caused trouble without meaning to. She was broken and nobody could fix her. _I do love Elsa, but not like I should. It's almost like…like she's embarrassing somehow because Idun and I couldn't have two normal girls instead of one normal one-Anna-and then there's…Elsa. That isn't fair to Elsa. That isn't her fault._

 _And she has a lousy father that didn't-doesn't-even take care of her properly. Of course she's broken. Why wouldn't she be? It's my fault she's still hurting inside. Elsa is twenty-one, almost twenty-two now. She shouldn't be looking to her father for approval. She's a young adult. And…Elsa isn't. She's just a little girl._ Agdar was still thinking when he felt the coldness in his chest abruptly fade, and then Elsa just went limp, her blue eyes fluttering shut. "Elsa? Elsa! What did you do?!"

"Healed Papa's heart," Elsa said contentedly. "Not…s'posed to, so…collapsed…" She didn't feel sick in any way, but her body had abruptly gotten very weak all of a sudden, and she could no longer hold herself upright. Still, her daddy was fine now, so…that was okay. She'd just have to rest for awhile before going home.

Agdar sighed as he picked Elsa up. _She said she couldn't do that! Except…she said 'maybe if I were an ice master', and she tried to do something more "advanced" with her magic than she was supposed to? I don't know._ He carefully set her down on the bed and slipped her shoes off before tucking her under the covers. "Elsa, I'm sorry I can't love you the way I should," he said quietly.

"I…love you…anyway," Elsa replied. Right that second, she was so relieved and delighted that she'd been able to help Agdar that nothing else could bother her. Even if her daddy didn't love her like he did Anna, she was absolutely sure he would keep her safe if someone tried to hurt her. He'd just slapped her because he was scared; he wouldn't do that again. So there. She might have been scared too if there was a live dragon trying to freeze her. She _had_ been frightened when Linnae had knocked that tree on her and Anna. _I'm so tired…_

Agdar gently touched Elsa's cheek in the same spot where he'd hit her. Elsa didn't flinch, but she opened her eyes sleepily. _Why did I do that? Elsa didn't deserve that._ "I'm sorry, Elsa," he said in a flat voice. _Wait…Elsa didn't get rid of all of the ice. She thinks she did, but she didn't. I can feel it. She really can't._

 _Agdar, don't you dare tell her. She's happy; let her be._

"Not…big deal. Just…me, not Anna," Elsa replied honestly. "Papa…just scared. Not hurt me…again." She flinched when she heard loud, angry voices outside. _That sounds like a whole crowd of people. What's going on?_ "Papa, there's-" Elsa started, but her father cut her off.

"Elsa, just stay put," Agdar said firmly. "I hear it." He blanched when he went and looked out the window.

"Papa, those people…they're after… _me_ …aren't they?" Elsa asked matter-of-factly, trying to sit up. _Come on, Elsa, get up. I can't-nothing's cooperating. I wasn't supposed to be trying to heal Papa, and I messed myself up._

Agdar forced a smile and just slid a bookcase aside, revealing a small hidden room behind it. "You stay in here," he said quickly, picking Elsa up and setting her down inside. "It isn't like the passages at home-it's just the one room-but it'll do. I'll go find your cousin and tell her where you are, and she'll take you home. I have to go calm those people down. You'll be safe. Stay here."

"But Papa-"

"You can't help, Elsa. You can't even sit up properly right now. _Stay here_ ," Agdar said again. He suppressed a shiver and backed out of the tiny room. "You need to go home and get out of here. You don't belong here," he added quietly. "It isn't safe for you-or your cousin, for that matter."

Elsa's blue eyes grew sad; she easily understood what her father meant. "Papa-"

"Elsa, this is not Arendelle. You don't have the influence you do there here-not in a good way. You could cause a huge mess of damage in Arendelle and all of the people would still kiss your shoes. Doesn't work that way here. That sleazy duke poisoned the minds of many of the people here, and yet they didn't even like him. I can take care of this, but I need you to go home," Agdar explained. Before Elsa could protest again, Agdar shut her inside the little secret room. _Now to calm those people down and get my daughter home where she belongs._

Inside the tiny room, Elsa curled up under the soft blanket Agdar had left for her. While she easily understood why her father had put her in the secret room, it still reminded her of being left in her own room back when she was eight, and that hurt. And it was pitch black in the tiny room. It made her feel claustrophobic. _I don't even know how to open the hidden door from this side. Rapunzel, please come find me soon._

 **A/N: I realize Elsa has been _much_ better inside recently, but give her a break; she thought she was responsible for killing her father and kind of freaked out. She's okay now.:)**

 **And yes, Elsa was not supposed to try to heal Agdar completely; her magic simply won't. That's why her body isn't working properly at the moment, since she tried to do something she wasn't supposed to do with her magic, and her magic is physically part of her. Agdar will have to figure out the "act of true love" himself; Elsa cannot get rid of all of the ice entirely. And it has to be genuine, not just to save his own skin or something he's doing out of duty.**

 **Next chapter coming soon:)**


	34. Chapter 34

**A/N: Thanks to everyone who's followed/ravorited and/or is reading but not reviewing. I apologize for the extremely late chapter. :(**

 **Elsa and Ingrid-Magic has to have limits or it won't make sense.:)**

 **DodgersGirl-Thank you! I did PM you back when you left the review, but I probably owe you one again.:)**

 **FluffyKitten-This chapter is mostly focused on the human characters, so more on Linnae next time.:P Ahaha, no, that's okay. Agdar kind of deserved it. Yes, Linnae's actions made Elsa upset, but Elsa is way too forgiving, so...yeah.:/ No, Elsa is NOT an ice master. That's why she couldn't heal Agdar entirely, and made her magic 'act up' in the process. (it's pretty much "sick" and "lethargic" to her at the moment, since it didn't want her to try that). Yes, if Elsa were an ice master, she could have healed a frozen heart herself. She still would have gotten a bit tired, but that's it.**

 **Elsa Tomago-Well, Elsa will be okay, but she needs to just...calm...down.:) Linnae is stubborn, and unlike Elsa, she can and will hold a grudge. Linnae naturally doesn't like Agdar anyway, although she wouldn't have frozen him of her own accord either, if that makes sense. Elsa has given her father a chance to heal himself, but she can't do it for him, either. And yes, if he had genuinely given Elsa a hug out of love-not duty or guilt-it would have healed him too. That won't happen, simply because it would make Elsa very, very upset, and I don't think she would be okay after that. I'll not do that to her.**

 **Olivia O'Neil-Thank you:)**

 **IndyGirl89-That will happen in this chapter, but who the act of true love is for I won't say.:)**

 **moohamquest-Elsa will be all right:) Promise:)**

 **raven678-Elsa will be all right, but she's stressed out and nervous at the moment, so...yeah. Just give her a chance.:) You're right, she IS mostly okay now.:)**

 **On to the story!**

"You do realize the Snow Queen is far more valuable as an ally than an enemy," Agdar shouted above the noise of the crowd.

"She _creates life!_ That's inhuman!"

"That creature could have killed us!"

"Why did you even keep her alive?!"

"It's a witch!"

"QUIET!" Agdar screamed. The noise instantly ceased, although Agdar knew the slightest provocation would set it off again. He was horrified by the things he was hearing, but… _he had thought those things himself before_ , aside from the 'witch' comment. He had never, ever thought that-little Elsa had just been a tiny four-pound baby when her magic showed. Babies were not witches, so there. "Queen Elsa is no witch. She was born like that. Babies can't be witches. That's illogical," he said firmly.

A wave of positive murmurs went through the crowd. That was true. Then, "Still, why'd you keep her?! She's dangerous!" And, "Aren't you scared of her too? She's a force of nature!"

Agdar took a deep breath, unsure whether to just make up something or tell the truth. Making up something would just postpone needing an inevitable explanation. _Elsa would tell the truth_ , he thought suddenly. "I kept her because she is my daughter, even if she was different. She deserves to have a normal life like anyone else." He inwardly winced at that sentence…he himself had most definitely not given Elsa that. Agdar decided he would give his oldest daughter a hug and a material present as well the next time he saw her. Years of concealing his own emotions in public venues kept any of that train of thought from showing on his face. "Queen Elsa has virtually full control of her powers now, so she herself is not dangerous. Her dragon creature was poisoned. It did not cause damage by choice," he went on, suddenly completely sure that that was the case. _Elsa may be dangerous when she panics, but there's no need to point that out._

"We still don't want her here!" several people shouted, and there was a widespread murmuring of agreement. Then, "She had no right to take over Weselton! We've been absorbed!" someone else yelled.

Agdar's face remained calm, but inwardly his mind and heart were racing. The trouble was that even though he and Idun technically were in charge in Weselton…Elsa could still come and kick them out if she chose to do such a thing. After all, Elsa had quite literally taken over the duchy from that duke within minutes…singlehandedly. While Elsa had simply ceded it to her parents and therefore officially relinquished control over it, that fooled no one into thinking that Elsa could not just take it back, "treaty" type things or not. What Agdar knew quite well was that the general public of Weselton had been only too happy to get rid of the former Duke of "Weaseltown" and therefore accepted him and Idun instantly thinking _anyone_ was better than what they'd had, they did not like Elsa much.

"Queen Elsa of Arendelle ceded Weselton to my wife and myself," Agdar replied finally, carefully avoiding any touchy comments. "She signed off on it."

"Why would that stop her?! She'll be wanting to create an empire for herself next, and be dictator!"

Agdar had been feeling tiny pangs of cold running through him for all this time, and now a stronger one made him grit his teeth. _Agdar, you cannot collapse in front of these people. You'll have a riot on your hands or worse. Calm them down. And do not let them badmouth your daughter. She is innocent and you know it._ "My daughter may be powerful, but she is no dictator. Even if she was, she would never take advantage of anyone under her command!"

* * *

MEANWHILE…

Elsa still lay inside the tiny secret room in her father's suite. She couldn't hear anything from the crowd outside beyond muffled noises, and there was nothing to do or see inside the little room. It was pitch dark. Elsa tried to create her little dim blue glow "lamp" with her magic, but it quickly sputtered and went out. She shuddered and weakly pressed herself against the wall. _Well, Elsa, you wanted to mess up your magic earlier. Congratulations, you did, and now you want it,_ she thought ruefully. "At least…Papa's…okay," Elsa mumbled to herself.

"Elsa, I'm trying to get you out," Elsa heard Rapunzel say from just outside the secret room. "Can't find the opening thingie…" _Well, at least Uncle Agdar is trying to protect Elsa. He had better, I think._

"Blondie, it's not a _door_. There's probably a lever or something," Eugene pointed out. "Scoot. Let me try." In a few seconds, he had the bookcase aside and revealed the little room. "C'mon, Miss Icy, the three of us are going back to Arendelle. The people here are nuts." He tried to help Elsa to her feet, but she instantly collapsed. "Sorry. Blondie, you hold her. I'll get the secret room closed off again."

Elsa blinked at the sudden light and smiled a bit. _See, Elsa, you didn't have to feel upset at being left alone in there. You are going to go home now,_ she inwardly scolded herself. Then she heard loud voices out in the hall, and her smile vanished. "I think we…need to go. Now," Elsa whispered.

Eugene fumbled in his pocket before forcing a grin at the girls. "May have dropped the crystal. Hole in my pocket," he admitted reluctantly. He heard the voices coming closer and quickly shoved both girls into the tiny room. "I'll cover for us and find that crystal. Just be quiet."

Rapunzel nodded and scooted closer to Elsa so Eugene could shut them in. "We'll be fine," she whispered, half to Eugene and half to Elsa. The second the 'door' was shut again, Rapunzel felt the temperature abruptly drop slightly. "It's gonna be fine, Elsa," Rapunzel whispered to Elsa, putting her arm around her cousin's shoulders. Elsa seemed tense, but didn't pull away. "D'you feel any more back to normal?"

Elsa slowly shook her head; then realized that Rapunzel couldn't see her in the dark and just mumbled a quiet, "No." She just felt weak all over. It reminded her of the way her bad leg felt if she tried to put any weight on it without her brace, except the rest of her would at least 'listen' to her mind's commands, even if it was hard. _Elsa, don't freak out. You don't have to do anything; you're safe in here. And you have Rapunzel with you, too._

"We ought t' take you to see those weird little trolls. Maybe they can help since it's a magic prob-" Rapunzel cut herself off when she felt Elsa squeeze her hand and whisper a 'shh'. "Sorry."

The girls heard angry voices demanding where 'that Snow Queen' might be, and then Eugene's nonchalant, "Come on, you guys, you really think Queen Elsa's in here? She's probably, you know, _helping_ someone, like she usually does. You're getting dirt all over the nice clean floor, you know…How come y'all hate her so much anyway? She's really friendly and kind of a nerd, and-"

"Oh, never mind, she's not in here," another voice said finally.

Elsa wasn't exactly pleased about being referred to as a nerd, but she stifled a giggle behind her hand. A second later, the secret "door" opened, and Eugene just said, "Be back soon. Gotta find that crystal. You guys will be safe in here," before shutting them in again.

Elsa sighed. She wanted to _do_ something, something that would actually help, not just sit there cooped up in the tiny secret room in the dark. She experimented with trying to use her magic again, but it felt…irritated and lethargic to her. It was not going to do anything of much help at the moment, at least not easily like it should. _What if Eugene can't find the crystal? What if my parents are in trouble? And it's really, really late-why hasn't everyone in this place gone to bed? And Linnae is still sleeping outside. Should I wake her up?_ Elsa's thoughts raced from one thing to another…as they always did when she felt nervous. Besides everything else, she still felt uneasy being stuck inside a tiny pitch-dark room not knowing how to open the "door" if she wanted to. Rapunzel being there with her helped, but it still bothered her for some reason. Well, she knew exactly what reason why, but she hated admitting, even to herself, that she was still scared of being left alone locked in a room like when she was little. _I'm better now. I might be scared, but I'm not panicking or anything,_ Elsa reminded herself firmly. _I'm_ fine _, really._

Rapunzel knew her cousin was _not_ comfortable being stuck in the little room, even though Elsa wasn't making a fuss of any kind whatsoever. The temperature kept fluctuating up and down, like Elsa was fighting with herself to leave it alone. Overall it was slowly getting chillier. _Elsa must be scared._ Unsure whether it was safe to say anything aloud or not in case there were listening ears outside their hiding place, Rapunzel just pulled the blanket up to her chin and squeezed Elsa's hand. The blanket wasn't much help since Elsa was right next to her and Elsa herself was cold, but Rapunzel said nothing. _What if Elsa gets a draft out of here? That would be really, really bad…_ She chewed on a bit of her brown hair nervously. If someone bad found them, she had no idea what she would do. Elsa was useless to defend them at the moment and Rapunzel didn't have a frying pan or some other heavy object to fight back with.

Eugene had actually taught her a bit of self-defense ("You won't be carrying a frying pan around all the time, you know," he'd pointed out, "and you never know when or if you might need it!"), but she had never had cause to use it and there was no way she could defend herself _and_ keep Elsa safe too anyway. Besides, that crazy cousin of hers would probably just give herself up if she thought it would keep everyone safe. _Elsa isn't dangerous to anyone but herself. And if any of the people here that don't like her knew that, they'd be trying to take advantage of her instead of hating her,_ Rapunzel thought bitterly. Her own parents back in Corona had taught her that as a princess, you would always put your citizens first above yourself, but that you never, ever let someone think that you didn't value yourself enough to fight back on your own behalf if necessary, whether that was verbally or physically. ("It better be verbally, I hope!" her mother had said, smiling and giving her a hug.) Elsa didn't have that-she would do anything to protect others, but that was it. She had little to no value in herself; she didn't think _just plain Elsa_ was worth anything. Rapunzel remembered another thing her own mother had told her after hearing her call herself unattractive. "You shouldn't be prideful, of course, but you should have a healthy self-esteem. That 'Mother' Gothel was emotionally manipulative, and that is wrong," she'd said firmly. Rapunzel hated telling her mother about Gothel, but she had explained about the repeated 'Oh, look, you're there too!' comments after saying something about a beautiful young lady. _I oughta tell Elsa about that. I wasn't nearly as bad off as Elsa was when she was little-at least I wasn't terrified and sad all the time-but Mom made me talk about Bad Stuff From Ages Ago every single week for awhile, and it was really helpful. I'm completely fine now, actually! Maybe Elsa needs that too? The only thing is, I_ know _she confides in Anna a lot. And she's still…not fine. I bet she only talks when she's already upset though, not as a precaution before she gets upset in the first place. That's probably why. Elsa doesn't like talking about her feelings at all._

Elsa poked her cousin's arm sharply, jerking Rapunzel out of her thoughts. "Something's wrong," Elsa whispered nearly inaudibly. She had heard what she was fairly certain were her mother's footsteps, then heavier ones, and then some muffled thumps. _If Mama's in trouble, I have to help her. I have to._ Elsa lifted her hand and experimented making her signature snowflake.

"Stop it," Rapunzel hissed in Elsa's ear. _Elsa's magic makes noise. Very quiet noise, but noise all the same._

Elsa ignored her.

Both girls figuratively froze when they heard a deep voice seemingly right nearby. "I know you are harboring her here somewhere! Where is she?"

"I don't know!" Idun replied honestly. She had a good idea of where Agdar had hidden Elsa, but she wasn't sure, and there was no way she would risk someone hurting her. "Get away from me!"

Elsa felt her magic abruptly building up inside her, and it wouldn't listen to her, either. _What's wrong with me? It's like it's…sick. I have to help Mama!_ Instantly freezing-cold gale force winds forced the secret room open before Elsa could think or do anything voluntarily, and she tried to stand up…and failed. _I don't care. That man has no right to do that._ "Don't you _dare_ touch my mother!" she ordered as best she could. She knew Rapunzel was still shivering behind her, but she couldn't think about that now. "I said, do _not_ touch her!"

"You knew where that…that _witch_ was all the time!" the man Elsa didn't recognize accused. He immediately shoved Idun away and dragged Elsa out of the hidden room by the arm. "You have _your public_ to meet. Stand up, you."

"I can't," Elsa muttered, her blue eyes darting nervously from Rapunzel to Idun. She shook her head lightly, hoping they would understand. _Don't do anything. Please. I don't want you hurt. I just…I wish my magic would work properly. Then I could get all of us out of here._ Elsa debated on making an effort to defend herself, but decided against it. All she would get would be a few snowflakes, which wouldn't help and would only make the man angry. Right now he wasn't bothering Rapunzel or Idun, so she had done her job. Now she had to think of a way to make him and whoever else was with him to leave her alone without risking her family's safety.

* * *

Just then, Eugene walked in, a now very cold Agdar leaning on his arm. Eugene couldn't bring himself to be horrified; it was just like Elsa to go and trade herself to get a bad person to leave people she cared about alone. "C'mon, man, grabbing a lady isn't right!" he pointed out, trying to appeal to whatever morals the guy might have. _He doesn't have much,_ he thought, realizing just what the man had his eyes on. Without thinking further, Eugene planted himself in front of Rapunzel and Idun. That man would have to knock him out if he wanted to bother his wife, so there. "Dude, please leave her alone. She never did anything to you," Eugene said flatly. "Besides, you seem to hate her, so kindly take your hands off her entirely. If you hate her, then you can't possibly think she's nice-looking."

Elsa had simply scrunched her eyes shut as she tried to think of something helpful to do that didn't involve her magic, but she cringed when she felt a rough hand touching her hair. Then, an instant later, she felt herself flung to the floor and heard her father's pained but enraged voice. _Papa?_

"You will _not_ touch my daughter that way! She may cause trouble sometimes, but she's innocent! Innocent, you hear me?!" Agdar hesitated for a second when the man pulled out a pistol, but then went on anyway, "You want to hurt Elsa, you go through me first," he said firmly, planting himself right in front of Elsa. "She has done nothing wrong and you and I know it." He could feel ice creeping through his body, but deep inside he knew that was not Elsa's fault. She had done her very best to heal him-that was why she couldn't fight back for herself right this second.

"Why would you defend a thing like her anyway?!"

Agdar looked back at Elsa, who was still on the floor, her blue eyes watching him closely. She said nothing. "She is my daughter and I…I care about her. She is innocent," he repeated firmly. "Just _look_ at her. You cannot in all honesty tell me you think she means you or anyone else any harm. She let you drag her around by the arm to keep my wife and Princess Rapunzel safe, for goodness sakes."

The man put his pistol back in his pocket, but still glared angrily. "I see your point. There will be no more…fuss, shall we say," he muttered awkwardly. "You have my word."

Agdar nodded dismissively. While he wanted to press the issue and put the troublemakers in jail or something, that wouldn't help Elsa's image. He would let them go this time, but next time…well, that was another story. Next time they were apt to get the harshest sentence he could come up with. Execution, if they deserved it. He turned to Elsa to ask if she was all right, but abruptly clapped his hand to his chest and winced.

Elsa instantly knew what was wrong. _I…I didn't heal Papa. I_ still _didn't. Can't I do anything right? And…and Papa defended me. Why isn't he healed now? Didn't that count?_ She felt tears filling her eyes and tried her best to wipe them away. There was nothing else she could do to help her daddy; she had done everything she could. And…and selfishly, _why hadn't her daddy defending her_ healed him? What had to be done? "Papa, kiss Mama," she said softly, realizing what the issue really was. _Papa defended me because he considered it his duty. Simply caring about me-even loving me, just a bit-wasn't enough. It has to be genuine, strong love…like what Anna did for me. It probably would have worked if Papa had been defending Anna and not me, I bet, too._

Elsa hoped it didn't have to be anything so drastic as that.

Luckily it didn't, as it turned out, because Elsa's idea worked quickly. Agdar gently picked Elsa up after that and just held her tightly. "Thank you, Elsa," he said flatly. He refused to cry, but his eyes felt hot all the same. _I can't love my own daughter properly, just because she's different. That is not fair to Elsa. What have I done?_ He also couldn't help wondering if his little girl might be hurt from seeing undeniable evidence that he didn't love her like he should. Elsa was maddeningly sensitive, but that was just the way she was; it wasn't her fault. "Are you all right?" he asked awkwardly.

Elsa nodded and just hid her face in her daddy's shoulder. Her arm was bruised and one palm was a bit scraped from being flung on the floor, but she was fine otherwise. Right then she was just so, so relieved that Agdar was okay she couldn't be bothered by anything else. _Papa is fine. I didn't…kill him. So there. And I wish my magic would go back to normal. It…feels weird. I think it's sick._ She actually felt a bit better than she had right after she'd attempted to thaw _all_ of the ice in her father's heart, but definitely not anywhere near back to normal, either.

Rapunzel shifted her weight from one foot to the other, uncertain if she should say anything about her idea that might help her cousin. No, she decided, she would not tell her aunt and uncle anything. She would tell Anna and Kristoff when they got back to Arendelle. They would help Elsa way more than her parents would. She hated watching Elsa being around her father; she had a sickening feeling that Agdar _was_ genuinely trying to treat her better, but simply because he had realized that he was supposed to do so and that he had hurt her, not because he had had a complete change of heart and loved Elsa like he should. _Does Elsa know that? She's not stupid; she has to know._ "Hey, Elsa, Eugene found the crystal. We can go now," she said lightly, holding out the crystal.

Elsa reached for the crystal, but then frowned. "This isn't recharged enough to get us all back. I don't even know if it'll get _one_ of us back. We probably need to wait 'til tomorrow," she said. She stifled a yawn and then yelped in protest when her mother picked her up. "Mama…"

"You're staying here tonight, Elsa. You obviously can't walk by yourself right now, so be quiet," Idun said firmly. "Rapunzel, you follow me. You can stay in the same room with Elsa. There is a sofa in this guest room. Eugene can sleep there or in another room, I don't care, but I don't want Elsa by herself."

Eugene cleared his throat and gave Idun a winning smile. "Well, I was thinking I'd like to spend the night with my wife, Mrs. Grieg," he countered, putting his arm around Rapunzel. "Figured you might _want_ Miss Icy with you guys," he added pointedly. "You know, since she doesn't see you at all since you moved here." _C'mon, say you do. I don't even know why Elsa loves you two so much when you clearly don't care about her enough. Change your minds._

"There's not enough space in-"

"Agdar, there is plenty of space," Idun interrupted, holding Elsa closer. "Elsa can't even walk by herself right now. She needs someone with her, at least until she feels better."

"She's not five. She does not need to sleep in the same room with her parents."

Elsa managed to give her mother a shaky smile, but inside she just wanted to cry. _No, I'm not five, but you don't really want me here, Papa. That hurts._ "I'll be fine on my own," she said quietly. "It's okay."

* * *

A few minutes later, Elsa was curled up on the sofa in the offered guest room, having insisted that Eugene and Rapunzel could have the bed. "Just remember that I'm in here and don't…do anything, please," she said awkwardly, her pale cheeks flushed pink.

"No kissing?" Eugene teased good-naturedly, knowing quite well what Elsa would not expressly say.

"Eugene, cut it out. Let's just all go to sleep," Rapunzel said grumpily, turning out the lamp as she climbed into bed. She _really_ wished they could go back to Arendelle. It was very late; they were all tired; and she knew all too well that Elsa was uncomfortable in Weselton. No one wanted her there. Rapunzel wanted to get her sensitive cousin away from her parents, too. All they did was make her upset, especially Agdar. At the very least it certainly seemed that way.

Elsa was glad it was dark in the room when she finally let herself cry silently. If she was lucky, no one would hear her and her magic wouldn't do anything but make snowflakes around her. Since she was on the other side of the room from the others, they shouldn't know. _I don't even know why I'm crying. What's wrong with me?_

 _I miss Anna. And I want to go home._ She thought about her parents just across the hall and how her father hadn't wanted her in the same room, even. He'd looked slightly nervous. Was he still worried she might lose control in her sleep or something? That face he'd made at her when Idun had pointed out that she couldn't walk at the moment hurt, too. He'd looked embarrassed. And now that the crisis was over, it really, really hurt that Agdar defending her hadn't healed him. _I should be grateful Papa defended me at all,_ she scolded herself. _At least he cares about me enough to do that._

"Everything all right?" Eugene called a moment later. "It's getting drafty in here."

Elsa didn't answer, and Eugene decided not to press the issue. Maybe Elsa needed a chance to think and calm down on her own. Or she could have just randomly decided it was too hot in the room, since the drop in temperature hadn't been drastic.

* * *

When Eugene was jerked awake a few hours later, it took him a second to realize where he was before understanding dawned on him. _Blondie's cousin needs help-she's having a bad dream._ Without thinking further, he quickly turned the lamp on and shook Rapunzel awake. "Blondie, wake up. You'd better talk to Elsa. She needs help," he hissed. "C'mon, wake up!"

Rapunzel yawned as she sat up and just blinked in confusion. _Why's it so cold in here? Oh yeah. Elsa. She's upset._ She hopped up and ran over to her cousin, but yelped when she touched Elsa's shoulder. "Elsa's freezing!" she whispered.

Eugene, still feeling half asleep, just yanked the blankets off the bed and tossed them over Elsa before shaking her shoulder hard. "Elsa, you are not chained up anywhere," he said firmly. "Wake up."

Elsa's blue eyes slowly blinked open, her body shaking as she tried to slow her breathing down and stop the tears running down her cheeks. _Papa didn't hurt me. Those bad people didn't hurt me or Mama or Rapunzel or Anna, either. I'm not locked away again. I didn't sign any abdication paper thing. Calm down, Elsa. And I haven't had a nightmare in a while. I…I didn't want anyone but Anna and Gerda to know. And...and…_ "I'm sorry," she whispered, scrunching her eyes shut. "I'm…I'm okay." Pause. "I'm… _f-fine_."

"No, Elsa, you are not," Rapunzel said quietly. She quickly helped Elsa sit up when she realized Elsa was struggling to do so by herself. "It's all right. We don't mind, promise."

"Need an ear, or four, to be exact, to talk to?" Eugene offered matter-of-factly.

"I…I signed abdication papers a-and Papa locked me away again," Elsa blurted, her eyes trained on her clenched fists. "The bad men hurt Mama and Rapunzel and Anna and…and I couldn't do _anything_. I _couldn't do anything_ ," she whispered bitterly. _Not because I didn't want to…I literally couldn't._ "Anna…Anna was _dead_. I…I hurt her somehow, it was my fault, I don't know what happened, I…I…"

Eugene frowned, remembering just what he'd heard Elsa saying in her sleep just before she had woken up. _She said something about being chained up somewhere and that something wasn't her fault._ "Elsa, you said, in the dream, that you couldn't do anything. How could you have hurt anyone then, let alone killed them?" he asked in his most serious voice.

Elsa hesitated. "Papa said it was my fault," she replied after a moment.

Eugene's usually grinning teasing face vanished as he suddenly stood up. _Figures._ "I will be back in a few minutes," he announced, and stalked out of the room, slamming the door behind him.

Rapunzel simply put her arms around her cousin and gave her a hug. "You're going to be just fine. I think you're just kinda stressed out from everything. That's why you had a nightmare." _And Uncle Agdar hurt her._

Elsa sighed. She felt better now, but she was also scared of going back to sleep. The same thing would just happen again. And Rapunzel was just as kind to her as Anna was, but she still missed her baby sister. Anna also just plain knew her better, and she wasn't quite so embarrassed to cry in front of Anna, either. Elsa still felt embarrassed for breaking down in front of her cousin in the first place. "I think maybe I'll read a book or something," she said finally.

* * *

Across the hall, Eugene had marched straight into Elsa's parents' room and turned the lamp on and proceeded to speak his mind. "Mr. Grieg, do you realize just what you've done to your own kid?!" he demanded angrily. "Not that Miss Icy is a kid anymore, but still! She might as well be, for all the sort of garbage she still believes from the stuff you put in her head!"

Agdar yawned and raised one eyebrow. "What are you talking about, young man? Get to the point, please."

Eugene sighed and started over. "Elsa had a nightmare. About people she loves being hurt and killed, and being locked up unable to do anything about it. Dream-you told her it was her fault. Look, sir, it's none of my stinking business, but you've _really_ hurt her, and you seem to be literally unable to take care of her properly. You have a sense of duty towards her, but that's it. That's why defending her didn't heal your frozen heart like it should have. You love your wife, you love Anna, but you don't love Elsa. You need to _do_ something about that!"

"Elsa is an adult. She doesn't need to be 'taken care of'."

"No, she isn't. She's got the emotions of a little kid. A traumatized little kid that just wants her father's love and will do most anything to get it, even if it kills her," Eugene retorted darkly. "She's terrified of not being good enough, because her best is never enough for you!"

"You are not my daughter's father. You aren't much older than she is, to be exact! You barely know her. How would you know?" Agdar asked.

"Because it's obvious to anyone with a brain, sir, pardon me! You're right, I don't know her that well yet, but I can see. You're embarrassed to claim her as yours; you're embarrassed that she has a bum leg-that she got saving her sister's life, I might add-and you're biased against her because of her powers. You are _prejudiced_ , and badly, too!" Eugene tried his best not to shout, not wanting Elsa and Rapunzel to overhear from across the hall. "The only thing so-called "wrong" with Elsa is that she's hurt so badly inside," he added quietly. "She's got some form of PTSD or an anxiety disorder or something, I don't know. But she needs help. _Not_ someone fussing over her and treating her differently. Just people treating her like a normal person and helping her talk through stuff when she's upset. That's not difficult."

"My daughter does not have mental issues like you're implying!" _Yes, she does. She's hurting and it's your fault,_ a little voice told Agdar firmly.

"It's not the end of the world that Elsa isn't so-called 'normal' like you want her to be," Eugene shot back. "As you pointed out, I barely know her. And I've seen her laugh and tell jokes and generally seem happy, just like anyone else would. She's fun to hang out with, too. Believe me, I _hate_ people who go and whine about things-she doesn't do that. Elsa's cool that way. She _likes_ doing things on her own. She does _not_ need some fusspot hovering over her all the time, just people liking and accepting her the way she is. The scared little kid part, too. Besides, she wouldn't have 'mental issues' in the first place if you hadn't treated her like dirt for who knows how long," he pointed out.

"She has that. All the people in Arendelle love her!"

" _You_ don't. I don't know why, but she wants _you_ to love her. She doesn't want you making faces at her because of her magic or because she needs a brace on her leg."

"Did you just come in here to make me feel guilty? I already know that! I'm trying!"

"Yes," Eugene replied instantly and unapologetically, "and, you aren't trying enough. I don't even get why you don't like her. Don't you miss her living here? Miss Icy's already like a funny little sister to me. She's nice. If her dad isn't going to care about her, then she can have a surrogate older brother instead."

"Miss Icy? And I _do_ care about her! I don't want to see Elsa hurt any more than you do," Agdar said truthfully. He remembered when Elsa had been ill around Christmas those months ago. He had felt horrible when he thought he might lose her. Now he realized he had started taking her for granted again. "And...you really think she's 'fun to hang out with'? You don't feel the least bit scared of her?"

"Well, subtly treating her like crap hurts her. You need to rethink your thought processes, because caring about somebody and still not accepting who they are is totally wrong. No, I do not feel scared of her. That girl isn't dangerous to anybody except herself." Eugene turned on his heel and stalked out without excusing himself.

* * *

"Come on, we're going back to Arendelle. Now," Eugene said when he came back into the room where Rapunzel and Elsa were. "Miss Icy, you wake up your ol' dragon. We'll ride her instead of using that crystal. I am not staying in this lousy mansion another minute."

Rapunzel frowned. "But Linnae was all weirded out. And it's really, really late. Like three in the morning late. And Elsa can't ride Linnae right now, either, remember?"

"We'll hold her. Is that ok?" Eugene asked, directing the question at Elsa.

"I can't calm Linnae down if she's still not…herself. I'm…that is, I can't…" Elsa bit her lip, wondering what she should do. She was only too happy to leave Weselton right then, but she was worried what Linnae might do and she felt like she'd probably be a burden on Rapunzel and Eugene, too. _I still feel all shaken up from that bad dream, too. I might freak Linnae out myself or something. And my magic still isn't working right…_

"She's probably slept it off, Miss Icy," Eugene pointed out.

Elsa hesitated and just looked down at her hands. "What if she hasn't?" she asked softly. "It'll start up a riot or something again. Because of me." _But I do want to go home… It doesn't matter, Elsa. You cannot wake Linnae up._

"Elsa…" Rapunzel started, but then she cut herself off. Elsa did have a point. Linnae was indeed _probably_ fine again, but there was a chance that she was not. "Elsa, would you like us to stay up with you and we can just go back to Arendelle tomorrow like we originally planned?"

Elsa shook her head, her expression determined. "No. You two go back to bed. I'll be fine. I don't want you staying up just because I can't sleep well here," she said firmly. "Really. I won't freak out again. I'll just read a book or something." _I am fine. I am not going to let myself panic like that again, so there._

* * *

AT DAWN IN ARENDELLE…

"But it's the truth! You've got to tell An-Princess Anna!" Hans insisted for the fourth time.

"You expect me to believe some random dude gave you a message that invited you to get Queen Elsa kidnapped for some terrorist people and you _aren't_ faking it?" Kristoff demanded. "Where is the guy now then?" He glanced around the stable warily.

"If I wanted to hurt her again, I'd have done it myself already," Hans scoffed in frustration. "Why would I want to get mixed up with some terrorist group? Thanks but no thanks." He stabbed at the hay for the horses and flung it up into the loft. "Not worth my time or energy. Elsa would just catch me again anyhow."

Kristoff shoved Hans against the stable wall, his brown eyes sharp with anger. "That's _Queen_ Elsa to you, you no good lying piece of-oh, hi Anna!" his tone of voice abruptly changed.

Anna raised her eyebrows. "Uh, Kristoff? Elsa's gonna be mad at you if you're beating up that creep," she said matter-of-factly. "Not that I care, but…and what are you doing in here anyway? Your job is to clean up stuff. Not talk to Kristoff," Anna added, crossing her arms as she glared at Hans. "Elsa oughta have just left you in that dungeon cell. Like you wanted to do to her," she spat. "And you _stay away_ from my sister or I will mash your face in no matter what Elsa says, so there."

Hans was not the apologizing type anyway, and now he was angry that nobody believed him when he was genuinely trying to be helpful. "Don't say I didn't warn you then. There are terrorist people after her, is all I'm saying. I'll be _in my cell_ if you want the rest of what I know," he said, and stalked off.

Anna couldn't help thinking what did Hans care, he hated Elsa anyway, but then she had another thought. What if Hans really was telling the truth? He had no reason to lie to her or Kristoff at this point. And she wanted Elsa home _now_. She had gotten up so early simply to go find Kristoff and get him to look for Elsa and wait for her to get there.

"Anna, that guy likes Elsa," Kristoff said just then. "I don't know why or how he thinks he has rights to do that, but he does. I could tell from the way he said her name."

"Who likes me?" Anna nearly jumped out of her skin when she heard Elsa's curious voice behind her. "Elsa, you scared me half to death, but I'm so glad you're back, and-" She frowned. Elsa was back, and so were Eugene and Rapunzel, but why was Eugene holding Elsa? And why did Elsa look so tired? "Elsa, what happened? What's wrong with you?" Anna asked, tugging her sister's arm.

"I tried to heal Papa, but I wasn't supposed to, I don't think…the 'only an act of true love can thaw a frozen heart' thing. My magic feels…sick," Elsa explained. "Well, not _sick_ , but I don't know how to explain it, either. Anyways, since my magic isn't working right at the moment, the rest of me isn't working right either. I feel stronger now than last night, though." She looked at Anna worriedly, slightly scared that her little sister might be mad at her or something. "Anna?"

Anna frowned. _Elsa doesn't seem_ upset _, really, but she's not completely happy, either. Something happened. And her magic got irritated with her or something for "doing something she wasn't supposed to"? What on earth is that supposed to mean?_ She tugged at her sister's arm again, wanting Eugene to just put Elsa down so she could help her walk inside.

"Anna. Miss Icy can't walk by herself right now," Eugene said firmly. "We were thinking it might be a good idea to take her to see those weird little troll creatures or something." He carefully put Elsa in Anna's arms, making sure not to drop her.

Elsa instantly put her arms around her little sister's neck and hugged her as tightly as she could, which wasn't much right then, but she didn't care. She was home and everyone was safe and Anna did not look at her like she was just a duty or a bother or something. Elsa felt completely exhausted from not sleeping most of the night before…partly because she couldn't and partly because she'd been scared to try. _You're at home, Elsa. Anna is not dead, whether it was your fault or not. That was just a horrible dream and you know it._

Anna gently set Elsa down on her feet, but kept a supportive arm around her so she wouldn't collapse. She could tell already that Elsa wouldn't be able to walk all the way back inside, even with help, and she just gave Elsa's hand a reassuring squeeze. "You'll just have to tell me when you can't walk anymore, 'kay? Let's go inside."

* * *

"Did you sleep _at all_ last night?" Anna asked once she had gotten a very tired Elsa upstairs to her room. Anna had ended up carrying Elsa most of the way there, much to Elsa's frustration with herself.

Elsa bit her lip and looked away from her little sister, not quite sure what to say to that. Anna certainly already knew that at the very least, she hadn't slept much. If she admitted to freaking out because of a horrible nightmare, Anna would just start worrying about her again. Anna was probably already still worried from what she'd tried to do when she had thought she was responsible for killing her father. Anna would think she was regressing or something. And she just wanted Anna to be…proud of her. _Why should she be? I can't even sleep right. I did help Papa though._

 _You wouldn't have had to if the dragon_ you _made hadn't frozen him, Elsa. All you did was fix something you caused, at least indirectly. Why don't you just tell Anna the truth? Show her what a damaged weakling she has for a sibling._

"Elsa, don't cry. I don't know what happened exactly, but everything's fine now. It's ok. Really. Wait, no, it's all right to cry-I don't wanna tell you not to-but I want you to be happy, and…" Anna suddenly scowled when she felt a shaking cold hand clutching hers tightly. _Elsa's not just upset. She's_ scared _. Something scared her._ "Elsa…"

"I'm sorry, Anna. I'm so sorry," Elsa said quietly. "I…I had a really bad nightmare and I couldn't sleep and I'm supposed to be better now and I'm _trying_ and I just…I just _can't-_ I messed up again, and-" Elsa cut herself off when she felt warm comforting arms just holding her securely. Anna didn't care; Anna still loved her, and somehow that just made Elsa feel worse. _It's been almost a year, Elsa, and you still can't function properly without Anna or Gerda. What is wrong with you?_

 _Yes, I can. I'm just stressed out. I'm fine. I can't 'quit trying'. That was the first time I had a horrible dream like that in quite a while. I_ am _better. So there._

"You didn't mess up anything," Anna said firmly. "The only thing you 'mess up' is the way you think about yourself. You _never_ mess up anything else. You don't have nightmares all the time anymore-you've said so yourself. I think that, under the circumstances, it wasn't weird for you to have one. You weren't at home and you were all freaked out already before you left. Give yourself a break, you stinker." A sudden thought struck her, and she squeezed Elsa closer. "Did the people not like you there?" she asked softly.

"They…I think they wanted to kill me. At least hurt me, anyways," Elsa replied honestly. "Papa actually defended me, but…"

"But what?"

"He did it out of duty. Not love. He had to kiss Mama to heal his heart. I wasn't surprised _at all_ , but it still just… _hurt_ ," Elsa admitted hesitantly. Maybe that sounded selfish, she wasn't sure. "Papa d-didn't want me sleeping in the same r-room with him and Mama, either. And…a-and-"

"Elsa, you don't have to continue. I get it," Anna interrupted quickly. Elsa starting to stutter as she talked just meant she was getting more upset, and Anna wanted to stop that before it got any further. She clutched Elsa tightly in her arms, her own eyes filling with tears. Thinking about Elsa going somewhere she was not wanted just to try to help someone that didn't even love her properly made Anna feel sick. No wonder Elsa was so upset. "Elsa, this does _not_ mean you aren't getting better. It means you're all stressed out. Again. And that you are actually stronger than you think," Anna spat. "We _will_ get you better. So there." She remembered Gerda saying that Elsa might never be _completely_ fine, but that she could still live a happy life anyway, and Anna's tears finally overflowed. How _could_ her poor big sister ever get completely better if people kept hurting her? She probably still dearly valued and wanted their father's approval and love, and he wasn't giving it to her. True, he seemed to be _trying_ , but Anna just couldn't understand not loving and accepting Elsa for…Elsa. Elsa was her best friend.

Elsa was loyal and trustworthy.

She was smart and funny.

She was sensitive and would do anything to protect others.

She would love her family to the death-quite literally, too.

And…she did need extra care and she did cause trouble sometimes. That Anna admitted. Elsa also was absolutely horrible with feelings. She _was_ "damaged". Anna just didn't care. Elsa was still Elsa no matter what might be "wrong" with her. "Elsa, d'you think you can promise you won't try to…hurt yourself again like you did yesterday evening?" Anna asked hopefully. "And…you don't feel like…like you want to get rid of yourself again, do you?" she couldn't help adding. _I believe Elsa when she said that's not what she was trying to do, but still…_

The temperature abruptly plummeted about fifteen degrees, but Elsa quickly managed to get it back to normal, despite her magic still not working properly. "Anna…I didn't have those bad thoughts even when I _did_ try to hurt myself yesterday," Elsa said honestly. "I wasn't trying to…kill myself. I _promise._ I promised you I wouldn't do that, and I meant it. I was just scared and I wanted to cut off the magic flow so I couldn't hurt anyone else. That's it." Elsa's voice sounded slightly strained (and very tired), but she was determined to tell Anna the truth.

Anna decided not to press the issue right then. _Elsa didn't promise she wouldn't try to hurt herself again, but she's telling the truth. She'll be fine. I just won't let her be alone for awhile, that's all._ "I believe you. Thanks, Elsa. Go to sleep, 'kay?"

Elsa almost instantly relaxed. _Thank you, Anna. I don't want you worried about me._

Anna smiled when she realized Elsa had indeed finally fallen asleep a minute later. At least Elsa felt safe and calm enough to do that now. She was even smiling a bit, although there were still tears streaking her cheeks. "Elsa?"

Elsa didn't answer.

Anna wasn't quite sure what to do-she had a feeling that if she just tucked Elsa into bed and left her alone, Elsa would probably just get upset all over again. Because she knew Elsa needed sleep, she just stayed put. _Elsa will probably be perfectly fine and back to her usual self when she wakes up, I'll bet. She just needed to get away from Dad and Weselton and stuff, I'm sure. I know Elsa, and she_ is _better. I know she is._ "I love you, Elsa. You just remember that."

 **A/N: I know everyone is probably disappointed that Agdar's act of true love wasn't for Elsa, but it isn't believable at this point in his character development. As you guys can all see, he _does_ care about Elsa-he doesn't want her hurt and he wants her to be happy and he does indeed love her at least some-but his reasoning for defending her wasn't out of love; he did it out of duty. The reasoning behind the act is what counts, not the "dramatic-ness" of it. Therefore it didn't count, and simply hugging and kissing Idun did. Elsa knows this and it made her upset, but she'll be okay.:)**

 **Next chapter coming soon! (hopefully before 3 weeks...0.O :))**


	35. Chapter 35

**A/N: Thanks to everyone who's followed/favorited and/or is reading but not reviewing:)**

 **Elsa Tomago-Well, Elsa couldn't really defend herself at that moment since her magic wasn't working properly. (If she'd been at 100% full strength, she could have simply frozen the guy's feet in place or something.) At this point, Agdar does _care_ about Elsa (and loves her a little bit), but he mostly just feels it is his duty to treat Elsa better. He does recognize that he hurt her and treated her badly when she was little. But Elsa's magic needs _genuine strong love_ to thaw, not a sense of duty. As for Elsa sleeping on the sofa, she can be stubborn too and I figured she just insisted, that's all.:)**

 **FluffyKitten-Consult ch19 and ch21 of Mind Games:) She took over Weselton to get that slimy duke out of the way and ceded it to her parents instead. And yes, Elsa is definitely a nerd.:) Eugene defends Elsa because he knows Mother Gothel didn't treat Rapunzel right, either. Rapunzel may be fine now, but she wasn't three years ago (this is touched on in this chapter). Lol, yes, stupid Hans like-likes Elsa, but no worries, I hate HansxElsa and will never, ever pair them together. (More on this near the end of this chapter...)**

 **DodgersGirl-Lol, I actually did mean 'mash'. XD Seemed like something Anna would say.:P**

 **IndyGirl89-It's my headcanon that true love's kiss technically would work to heal a frozen heart...but it wouldn't have worked for Anna in the movie because she would have been choosing the selfish thing and letting Elsa die. Of course, Anna had no way of knowing that, obviously, but that's just my opinion. (Like if Anna HADN'T seen what was about to happen to Elsa, the kiss with Kristoff would work, but since she did see, it wouldn't.)**

 **moohamquest-Agdar does care about Elsa, but his sense of duty towards her wasn't enough, that's all. Elsa's home now, so she can spend time with Anna again.:) Linnae is still asleep in Weselton (remember, Elsa wouldn't wake her up because she didn't think she could control Linnae should the drug/poison not have worn off). But, Linnae will be coming home next chapter. Nope, Elsa does NOT like Hans back (I PMed you my reasoning, I think:))**

 **raven678-Agdar is...deeply prejudiced, and that makes it hard for him to change. He knows he treated Elsa horribly when she was little, so he's just trying to "do his duty" at this point. He does love Elsa some, but not nearly like he should. As for Eugene, he doesn't know Elsa _that_ well, but he kind of thinks of her like a little sister (hence defending her and the like). He also is a pretty easygoing teasing sort of person, so he treats her like he would anyone else (ie., giving her a silly nickname and stuff) Well, Anna won't be poisoned and made to hurt Elsa, so she'll be fine that way. You'll probably have a good idea of what's going on by the end of this chapter... Elsa's powers will be better ASAP.**

 **On to the story! I'm sorry for the late update-I hope the extra-long chapter makes up for it!:)**

Elsa woke up a few hours later feeling much better. Anna had tucked her into bed, but she'd stayed right beside her holding her hand. "Hi, Anna," Elsa whispered sheepishly. _Good grief, I acted so…stupid. I'm fine now. Not perfect, but fine. Papa is not here. What he did-or didn't-do still hurts, but I can't let him make me feel so awful like that again. I have Anna, and Gerda, and Mama didn't treat me like that. At least Papa is trying, even if he can't love me like he does Anna. I have to concentrate on that._

"Feeling better?" Anna asked hopefully, but Elsa didn't even need to answer. Anna could tell-Elsa seemed far more relaxed, and she was visibly at ease now, even if she still looked a bit tired. After a good night's sleep that night, Elsa would be just fine.

Elsa nodded. " _Much_ better. Thank you for…fixing me. I don't think I can walk much yet-my magic still doesn't feel quite right-but I…I feel _so_ much better. Inside. Not physically." She paused before adding hopefully, "Is your arm better now?" _Anna_ carried _me up here this morning and her arm was still hurt. I wonder if my ice made it so she could do that?_ Elsa clearly remembered breaking her own arm the summer before; she really hadn't been able to do much of anything with it until it had healed. Certainly not carry someone about the same size she was. But Elsa was far better at using her magic now than she had been then, and so she'd been able to use her ice to protect Anna's arm.

Anna grinned and held out her arm so Elsa could dissolve the icy splint she'd made. "Yep, Rapunzel healed it for me, but obviously she couldn't get rid of your ice." She shivered as she felt the coldness of Elsa's magic flow so close to her skin. She could tell Elsa's magic was indeed not back to normal-it seemed a bit "hiccup-y" compared to usual-but she wasn't perturbed. She trusted Elsa implicitly.

Elsa folded her hands close to her chest as she searched Anna's face nervously. _Anna shivered. What if I hurt her because my magic isn't working properly yet?_ "Are you okay, Anna? The truth, please?"

Anna just stared at her. "Well yeah. Why wouldn't I be, you stinker?" On impulse, she pulled the older girl close and just gave her a hug. Usually Elsa would return the gesture, but this time she didn't, although she didn't protest, either. _Elsa shouldn't be scared she might hurt me again. She's usually fine about that now…_

"You shivered," Elsa mumbled, half to herself and half to Anna. "And my magic is still…sick. It feels like it has hiccups."

Anna thought Elsa seemed strong enough to at least sit up by herself without help, so she pushed Elsa away and took her hands instead before she could protest. "Elsa, I shivered because I'm not immune to cold like you are, not because you hurt me somehow. Even if you _did_ hurt me, you can fix it. You know that." _Besides, goodness knows I can't get upset with Elsa for such a thing. She needs that brace for her leg because she got hurt saving me…_ "Also, if your magic is sick, maybe we should go see the trolls. Maybe they can help."

Elsa shook her head. She did not want to go see the trolls one bit. And she looked closely at Anna's arm herself before being satisfied that her little sister was indeed okay. Then she smiled mischievously as she asked, "Who were you and Kristoff saying liked me earlier? I'm curious."

Anna crossed her arms and made a face, although she was very, very relieved that Elsa seemed fine now. "That creep Hans, that's who!" she spat in disgust.

"…Oh."

"I told him I would mash his face in if he bothered you," Anna went on, clearly pleased with that statement.

Elsa frowned. "Anna, I don't want anything to do with him either, but you are _not_ going to mash his or anyone else's face in," she said firmly. "Anyways, we will not be needing to worry about such a thing, because he is not welcome in Arendelle once his sentence is up. He has to leave." She yawned and brushed her loose hair away from her face. "Do you think Gerda would mind if I asked her to please bring something to eat up here? I'm hungry, and I don't think I'll make it downstairs by myself."

Anna had hoped that Elsa would feel up to going downstairs when she woke up, but evidently she didn't. "Gerda already told me before you woke up that she'd bring both of us some lunch in a little while," she told Elsa. "Elsa, Rapunzel told me something else about an hour or so ago while you were asleep. That maybe you need some 'talking time' about how you're feeling and stuff when you _aren't_ upset so's you'll be less likely to get upset in the first place. She said Aunt Primrose did it with her for awhile and it really helped her."

Elsa just looked down at her hands and said nothing for a minute. _Why would Rapunzel ever need something like that? There's nothing wrong with her…_ "Rapunzel isn't…damaged like me," Elsa said softly. She didn't cry, but she looked up at Anna with sad eyes. "How would she know if something like that would help one way or the other?"

"She can't, sis. But that ol' Mother Gothel person that kidnapped her wasn't exactly nice to her all the time, you know. Rapunzel's also had three years or so to get better, and she hasn't been trying to take care of her country on her own for all that time, either," Anna pointed out, hoping that Elsa would react more positively to the idea this time.

"Rapunzel is also naturally an extrovert, like you. At the very least she's a mix, since she must have entertained herself stuck in that tower for so long. I don't think I would be like you or Rapunzel even if I wasn't all…messed up inside." Elsa frowned, trying to figure out how to explain what she meant. "I mean…I didn't like noisy parties and things like that even when I was little before the accident. I hated it; they made me tired. I _like_ doing certain things by myself and having alone time. It's just…I still get lonely sometimes, especially at night, and I feel scared of being…ignored or abandoned or something all the same. Does…does that make sense?" _Not really, Elsa. That sounds paradoxical, actually._

"Yes, actually," Anna replied truthfully. She didn't-couldn't-understand why her big sister seemed to actually _need_ a bit of 'alone time', but she did accept that that was just the way Elsa was. Technically that had never changed for Elsa-Anna could remember little seven-year-old Elsa hating parties and things like that. Little Elsa would always sneak off and hide in a corner to read or something. So that had absolutely nothing to do with Elsa's isolation; it was just the way she was naturally. The part that was from being treated badly for so long was Elsa's fear of being ignored or abandoned…and her admission of feeling lonely at night. Anna bit her lip. _Maybe I can't help Elsa heal her emotions properly because she's kind of-ok, a lot-introverted, and I'm not. I bet Kristoff could help her, though…_ "Elsa, would you be willing to try to talk to Kristoff?" Anna suggested.

"Whatever for?" Elsa was puzzled by that; why would her little sister want her to talk about her feelings to Kristoff? Not to mention Elsa herself did not like that idea one bit.

"Well, he's more of an introvert. Like you. So I bet he could understand the way you think about socializing and stuff better than I could. You aren't an ol' jerkface who's going to be all flirty or something, so I'd trust you alone with him," Anna said matter-of-factly. "And, like, you're really pretty, but I know Kristoff won't be all weird or anything. I trust him, too. Yeah. I think I'm gonna go get him now!" she said excitedly, hopping to her feet.

"Anna! Anna, I don't like this idea," Elsa protested. "Not at _all_! Anna…" she eyed the papers on her desk, "Anna, I have paperwork to do. I don't have time for-" Elsa cut herself off when she realized Anna had already run out of the room, but then felt puzzled when Anna ran right back in seconds later, pulling Nikoleta by the hand. "Now what?" she asked curiously.

"Niko, you just stay with Elsa, all right? I don't want her left alone," Anna said all in a rush, and ran right back out again. Elsa sighed, and Nikoleta just stood in the doorway awkwardly, unsure where she was supposed to go.

"If you were doing something else, you don't have to stay with me, Niko," Elsa said matter-of-factly. She frowned when she noticed her friend eyeing her window nervously. _What is going on? Nikoleta is acting really…odd. And I don't like it._

Nikoleta bit her lip before blurting, "I think you'd better ice that window shut before I leave. It's just…I don't know…."

Elsa crossed her arms and raised one eyebrow. "And…your point is…?"

Nikoleta bit her lip again, slightly unnerved by Elsa's ability to still look like the queen she was, even though she was just sitting in bed propped up with pillows, and clearly still tired. _Elsa can go from regular-if hurt-normal girl like me or Anna, to authoritative queen in an instant._ "Espen said all of us girls ought to stay indoors because some bad person said some stuff to him and Hans. And that I should tell you that you ought to…"

"Ought to what?"

"Well…fire or retrain your guards," Nikoleta told her apologetically. "Because the bad person shouldn't have been able to contact him or Hans in the first place."

"I don't think my guards are incompetent, but I do need to hire more," Elsa said thoughtfully. _Except…they_ aren't _doing their job. How many times has someone gotten into the courtyard or even the castle itself? Maybe I've let the castle be_ too _open? I don't know…_

"Q-Elsa, there's something else. This is just something I've realized; I didn't get it from anywhere. You're a public figure, and there are at least a few people right here in Arendelle that, well, they like you, but they also talk…trash about you," Nikoleta said awkwardly. "I've heard them. They'd never say it to your face, but…"

Elsa was puzzled by this. How could people talk trash about her and still like her? That didn't make sense. "I don't understand. That's paradoxical. You can't like someone and yet talk trash about them," she stated matter-of-factly. The idea that people would talk badly about her actually didn't bother her much; she'd been taught since she was very little that as a public figure of authority, you would have at least some people talk bad about you. That notion was normal to her.

Nikoleta sighed. She knew that Elsa just plain couldn't know or understand certain things as a girl that had grown up isolated from society, but that made it difficult and awkward to explain said things to her, too. "Not that kind of trash," she corrected. "Like… _trash_. Inappropriate things. That you would hear on the street or in a tavern or something."

Elsa just tilted her head to one side in confusion. "You mean swearing?" she asked curiously. "I don't like that, but that isn't so bad."

"No, Elsa. I know you don't think so, but you're pretty. That makes guys say stuff about you. Inappropriate things," Nikoleta tried to explain again. "They make comments and stuff."

"…Oh." Elsa finally understood what her friend was trying to say, but she didn't understand why anyone would think she was pretty. If people were saying bad things about her like that, maybe it was her fault because of her ice-dress or something. She looked down at her hands and then glanced up at Nikoleta shyly. "Is that my fault because of my dress?" she asked hesitantly. "Because I'm not pretty enough for anyone to say such things about me." _No, it isn't your fault, Elsa. You wouldn't know how to do some flirting thing if you tried._

Nikoleta was horrified. If she had made Elsa think something else was her fault, she would never forgive herself. "Of course not! I was just telling you because I think you should take a couple guards with you when you leave the castle, that's all. At least don't go anywhere alone, anyways. And really, haven't you seen yourself in a mirror? You've got all that lovely hair, among other things. I'd _love_ to have hair like yours," she said honestly.

"My hair is just weird, though. Not pretty like yours or Anna's or something." Elsa still couldn't understand other people actually _liking_ her hair and thinking it was pretty. To her it was just another thing that made her stick out like a sore thumb, and therefore she didn't hate it or love it; it was just there.

"What? Good grief, I don't think I should really be saying this, but seriously, _you_ are weird for thinking your hair is weird," Nikoleta told her truthfully. "It always looks great no matter what you do with it. Anyways, I'll be quiet now-it's none of my business…Elsa? There's one other thing. I…I think you do a great job being queen, but you'd be even better if you didn't push yourself so hard all the time. When you're out of commission, there's literally nothing anyone else can do. Not even Anna. Your magic always protects us and you do all kinds of awesome things with it. You do _everything_ , so when you're hurt or something-"

"Nikoleta." Elsa cut Nikoleta off, despite her dislike for interrupting others. Her blue eyes were sharp as she sat up straight the best she could. "Don't ever, _ever_ say that again, and certainly not in front of my sister," she ordered. Elsa held out her snowflake; while her magic was still not working quite right, she could easily make her snowflake again without feeling like a wet noodle. "That," she added, pointing to the snowflake, "does _not_ make me the one and only competent person in my country. That, has made me, and our country as a whole, a target. _That,_ is why you have an emotionally unstable girl as your queen." The snowflake vanished, and Elsa shook her head. "I do not want to _ever_ hear you or anyone else compliment me at Anna's expense."

Nikoleta stood stock still, slightly shocked. The Elsa in front of her wasn't the shy, hurt friend she knew. This Elsa was the queen, and it was somehow…unnerving. _She wouldn't have reacted that way if I'd complimented_ Anna _at_ her own _expense._ "I'm sorry," Nikoleta said finally.

Now that the moment had passed, Elsa was just disappointed. "I thought I could trust you to…to respect Anna more than me. Not the other way around," she said quietly. "Anna _will_ be queen one day. She is far more deserving of that position than I am." Elsa frowned when her friend dropped a curtsy. "Not _that_ sort of silly deferential respect. Please don't do that."

"To Princess Anna, then?" Nikoleta asked stiffly. She felt keenly aware of the difference in her and Elsa's social statuses at that moment, and she couldn't blame Elsa for it, either. She'd simply accidentally touched a sore spot for Elsa-that people were supposed to consider the princess just as competent as Elsa was-and Elsa had instinctively reverted back to her closed-off, 'queen' self because of it.

Elsa's expression just went blank. "No, of course not. I just won't have anyone implying Anna isn't good enough to take my place," she replied firmly. _Especially when it should be the other way around if someone were to imply something…_

* * *

Just then, Anna came running in and overheard Elsa's final statement. "I got our food and I-" She glanced from Nikoleta to Elsa and back again in confusion. What on earth had Nikoleta said that would have made Elsa act like that? Elsa actually looked almost…angry, even though she was wearing her best poker face expression. "Elsa?" Anna said questioningly.

"You may go," Elsa said to Nikoleta quickly, realizing that she needed to diffuse everything before Anna or Nikoleta got mad or upset or something. The second her door shut behind Nikoleta, Elsa immediately relaxed. _I hope Niko isn't mad at me…did I say anything wrong? I don't think I did. I had to say something to defend Anna. That isn't fair._

"Elsa, what did Niko say that made you say you wouldn't have anyone saying I wasn't good enough to take your place?" Anna asked, trying to search her sister's face for answers. "You sounded kind of mad at her."

"She made it sound like you couldn't take care of things when I'm out of commission," Elsa spat. "That I'm the only one in Arendelle that can defend and take charge of everything. Such _nonsense_! If anything, she should have said _you_ are the only one that can take care of things properly."

Anna looked down and just scuffed one foot back and forth on the carpet. _Elsa_ is _the only one that can take care of everything. What did she get so mad for? I could never take her place. It's not Elsa's magic-she's just really good at writing things and reading people and stuff. She might stink at socializing things a bit still, but that's it._ "That's silly, Elsa," Anna said finally. "'Cause it's true. I _can't_ take your place." Anna suddenly felt a bit small and just…stupid. There was no excuse for her, even. If she made a mistake, it was just her clumsy, impulsive self. At least if Elsa made a mistake, she had multiple, very valid excuses. _Elsa is so-called "damaged" and she still does an awesome job. I can just imagine what Elsa would do if she wasn't still…hurting._ She ran over to Elsa and just hugged her tightly. She knew Elsa would never admit to such a thing, but she felt like Elsa was _her_ support column in a way. And she kind of wished she were more like Elsa, too. Those thirteen years without her big sister had stunk; there had been a great big hole in her life where Elsa was missing. No Elsa teasing her or laughing when she did something silly. No Elsa at all. And yet she couldn't very well tell anyone about what her own feelings had been during that time, not when poor Elsa had had it ten times worse. Anna was still angry with their parents for what they had done; they'd traumatized Elsa and they'd stolen Elsa away from her, too.

All because of an _accident._ An accident little Elsa had been blamed for, when it wasn't her fault in the slightest. Anna no longer blamed herself for the accident, but she knew if she had to pick either herself or Elsa to blame, it would be herself. Little Elsa had shouted for five-year-old Anna to slow down, and she hadn't listened, just trusting that Elsa would catch her. She wondered if Elsa had ever tried to defend herself right after the accident, but she knew deep inside that Elsa had not. The little girl that she'd seen disappear into her room right after she'd woken up after the accident was already hurt. Little Elsa had already looked so sad. Anna hadn't understood then, but she did now. She thought of the next time she'd seen Elsa; Elsa had been sixteen then and she had _not_ been the confident big sister Anna remembered. Sixteen-year-old Elsa had been closed off and clearly terrified; Anna didn't understand how their parents couldn't have seen that something was wrong. They'd left her chained in the dungeon twice, even. Anna could still remember finding Elsa in the dungeon and letting her out. Elsa's first reaction? " _I th-thought you…gave up on m-me."_ She'd been so happy to just be able to hear Anna's voice. Anna blamed her parents entirely for Elsa's suicide attempt when she was eighteen. She could feel tears trickling down her cheeks as she clutched present-Elsa close, both feeling guilty for the way she'd felt during those years and just plain angry.

Elsa wasn't sure what had made Anna all upset, but she didn't try to pull away, even though Anna was squishing her and it kind of hurt. If squishing her made Anna feel better, then she was not going to protest. "Anna, what's wrong?" Elsa asked finally. "Is there something I can help you with?"

Anna abruptly jumped up and forced a very unconvincing smile. "Nope, Kristoff and I are supposed to help you. Like, talk about stuff and whatnot. I'm good."

Elsa crossed her arms and gave both Kristoff and Anna a skeptical look. "Not only do I not like this idea, I want to know why you were crying, Anna," she said firmly. "And until I know, I will not 'talk about stuff' one bit." _Why was Anna so upset? I know I didn't do anything to make her upset, at least I don't think so…_

 _Elsa will never believe me if I just tell her 'nothing'. I owe her the truth. It's just…I don't want her to blame herself or something…_ "Well, you're kind of like a support column for me," Anna said carefully. Elsa just looked confused (and surprised), so Anna went on, "And that column was missing for a really, really long time. There was a great big hole where it was missing. And it's all filled in now."

"Your support column has cracks all over it," Elsa said softly, looking down at her hands. A sudden impulse struck her, and she created a perfectly level 'table' of ice right over her lap. Then she made two simple columns, each just under a foot tall, and linked the two with a suspension bridge of sorts. "There is me, and there's you," she said to Anna, pointing to one column, then the other. She etched her signature snowflake on the Elsa column, and a flower on the Anna column. Elsa bit her lip before breaking the suspension part of the bridge apart, which made both columns wobble. "After the accident," she muttered. She focused on her clenched fist, and the snowflake-labeled column tipped over filled with cracks, nearly knocking the flower-labeled column over in the process. "Now." Elsa carefully reconstructed the bridge, but left the cracks in the snowflake column. There were a few marks on the flower column now, almost like normal flaws in ice you might find elsewhere, but it was still completely intact. Then she poked the snowflake column hard, and it fell over, pulling the flower one with it. "And that is why you don't have damaged support structures," she finished flatly.

Both Anna and Kristoff had been just watching Elsa's model in puzzlement, but both of them knew only too well what she had been trying to portray. "Elsa," Kristoff said quickly, "remake the bridge once more. The damaged version, not the original. I want to show you something." Elsa sighed, but obliged, and Kristoff grinned. "Now there's one thing you left out. You forgot to give your model a solid foundation. You and Anna have that-you care so much about each other. Nothing can take that away from either of you. Give your bridge supports a solid foundation."

Elsa frowned, but fastened both the damaged 'Elsa' column and the scratched 'Anna' one to the ice-table. _What are you getting at? I don't understand…wait…maybe I do? I don't know…_

"All right, now give your bridge a few more supports. Four or five, maybe," Kristoff told her. "Give all the supports a few flaws, too."

Elsa did that, too, and then looked at Kristoff quizzically when he picked the whole ice-table up and set it on the floor. She grinned as she watched Kristoff carefully step right up onto the small bridge. It didn't collapse, not even the damaged column representing herself.

"Elsa, those extra supports are your friends and family. _All_ of us are damaged in some way, at least a little, but when something causes a lot of stress-that would be me standing on the bridge-everyone takes a bit so one person doesn't have to carry it alone. You always try to carry things alone because you're the queen, but you don't have to." Kristoff got down and then purposely knocked the 'Elsa' column over. "Look. One can collapse entirely without ruining anything. The rest can cover for it while it's being repaired." Kristoff looked to Elsa expectantly, wanting her to repair the broken column. "Uh, the foundation bit is still there. Can you, like, remake it?"

* * *

Elsa's smile grew bigger as she remade the little column, this time making it completely solid, just…scarred. That was okay. She was fine. _And,_ she realized happily, _my magic is at least somewhat better. I can use it again, at least, and I don't feel so weak, either._ Elsa slowly swung her legs off the edge of her bed, still hesitant to actually try to get up even though she felt better now.

Anna grinned as she plopped on the bed next to Elsa, her own upset feelings forgotten. _Elsa's using her magic again! She must be feeling stronger._ "Elsa, I'm really, really happy you're feeling better, but don't overdo it, 'kay? Promise!"

Elsa nodded agreeably; she knew there were people out there that still wanted to hurt her and her friends, but with Anna by her side, she didn't feel _too_ concerned. She was stronger when she was with Anna, and while she knew she would not unleash her magic's full strength for her own sake, she would definitely do so for Anna's. "I'd still like to know why you were so upset," Elsa said quietly. "It wasn't only what you just told me. There's something else."

Kristoff cleared his throat and nodded at Anna. "Anna, just tell her what you told me," he said.

Anna began twirling one of her pigtail braids around her finger nervously, but she gave Kristoff a scathing look. _What did Kristoff have to say that for? He promised not to tell anybody, especially Elsa. And I promised Elsa I'd at least tell someone else if I felt upset or whatever if I didn't want to worry her. Which I did. I don't want to tell Elsa. She'll just be worried and she doesn't need that._ "It's, um, nothing," she said finally.

Elsa crossed her arms and just stared at her little sister. "That's a lie," she announced. "Anna, I…if you're upset about something, I want to be able to _help._ I can't do that if you don't tell me about it. I'm _supposed_ to try to help you…"

"But it's dumb!"

"If it's making you upset, it isn't dumb," Elsa replied quietly. _Goodness knows Anna has told_ me _that enough times. If that applies to me, it should apply to Anna too. More so._

"Well, then it's dumb compared to your issues you've had to deal with!" Anna shot back stubbornly. _Elsa's going to keep asking until I tell her, though…_ "It's just…Elsa, please don't laugh, but knowing you were hurting for all those years makes _me_ upset. I yelled at you sometimes, even. I mean, I did try to defend you against our parents some, but _I should have done more._ I could've snuck into your room, picked the lock, _something_. I don't know. And, like, I don't know how many times you've gotten hurt because of me-at least indirectly-in the past year. And I can't fix those things. Any of it. I…I've kind of had nightmares about it. Just once in a while though. Like the cave incident, but you were scared of me after or something." Anna's blue-green eyes were bright with tears as she looked down at her own lap. Much like Elsa, Anna dearly valued her sister's opinions. She knew quite well that Elsa would never laugh at her or anything like that, but she was somehow still…worried to hear Elsa's reaction.

"Anna, how on earth was any of that dumb?" Elsa asked gently as she reached for Anna's hand. "Well, it's dumb that you think you 'should have done more', but that's it. You couldn't have done much else; you were little. You would have just gotten both of us in trouble. You loved me and you never stopped _trying_. You…gave me a reason to l-live." Elsa's voice cracked a bit, but she kept going anyway. "As for recently, you know as well as I do that there were extenuating circumstances. You have never hurt me." _That Jade thing was the only incident that actually…hurt me badly, really. And that's just because I'm way too sensitive._

Anna abruptly jerked her head up and just stared at Elsa. "How can you _say_ that?!"

"She says that because it's true," Kristoff said before Elsa could say anything herself. "Anna, I told you this before-that crazy Jade person poisoned you. That wasn't your fault. And if you mean Elsa's bad leg, that happened because she saved your life. Something she _chose_ to do. So also not your fault."

"What Kristoff said," Elsa put in, smiling and giving Anna's hand a reassuring squeeze.

"Elsa still ended up hurt, and that just isn't fair, and-"

"Anna, that's just the way it is," Elsa interrupted softly. "There's no need to beat yourself up over it. I'm stuck with my…damaged self, and _you_ are the one who helps me realize every day that that's okay." A bit of Elsa dearly wanted to ask _Anna, would you like me better if I wasn't this way?_ but she didn't. That wouldn't help. She suddenly remembered something Anna herself had told her awhile back, before Pabbie had removed Kiara's powers but after Kiara had shocked her and injured her legs in the first place. "Anna, a couple days after we got back to Arendelle when I still couldn't walk at all, you took me outside and you got all upset because I couldn't climb a tree with you. D'you remember what I told you then, and what you told me?"

Anna scowled. "Yeah. You told me to climb the tree without you and that you'd be fine waiting for me at the bottom. And that you were just happy to be outside with me," she replied grumpily.

"And?" Elsa prompted.

"I gave you a piggyback ride instead of climbing the tree, and I slipped and fell on some ice. And dropped you. And instead of being mad or whatever, you somehow managed to make snow under me so I wasn't hurt." Anna scowled and didn't say anything more.

"And…?" That hadn't been what Elsa had wanted Anna to say, exactly.

Anna sighed huffily, but she continued on. "I was really worried I'd hurt you, but we ended up lying there in the snow looking at the clouds. You made some comment that you really, really liked watching the clouds like that because that activity wasn't any different. And I asked you how you could be so happy. You looked at me like I had three heads and said you still had what you wanted most, so you were fine."

Elsa waited to see if Anna would say anything else, but she didn't. "Anna, you told me nobody could ever take that something away from me. You told me you felt honored that I trusted you since I don't trust most people." _That something was you, Anna. I suppose that's probably why that whole cave incident made me so upset. I don't know. It doesn't matter._

"That horrid ol' Jade made me take that away from you!" Anna exclaimed. "Elsa, don't you get it? That's just the problem!"

"Jade took nothing from me," Elsa said firmly. "You know as well as I do that that was _not_ your fault. I shouldn't have let it get to me, and you know it. That is my fault for letting what she made you do hurt me. Not yours." _That's the truth. That wasn't Anna's fault at all, not in the least._

Kristoff frowned. While he understood what Elsa meant, that wasn't the right reasoning either any more than Anna's was. "I wasn't there, Elsa, but it isn't your fault any more than it is Anna's. I don't think it's unreasonable that either of you would be upset from that considering what I know about it. But you can't blame yourselves because the other one is upset." Kristoff honestly thought Elsa was ridiculously hypersensitive, but he did understand why she was that way. He had a feeling that if Anna knew her sister was completely ok, she probably wouldn't be upset herself anymore. Anna was just worried about her. Too worried. Kristoff had no wish to be a popsicle, but he decided to go ahead and say what he wanted to say anyway. "Anna, you do realize that Elsa _is_ all right, don't you? She might need some help, but she's fine."

Anna scowled. "She is _not_ all right. She's hurting and that's not fair!"

"That doesn't mean she's not all right. Means she's normal. She functions fine, and so do you. Look. Elsa's upset right this second and she isn't even leaking ice or snow anywhere. She's letting you touch her hand. What was going on last year at this time compared to now?"

Now Anna smiled. Kristoff was right; Elsa's hand felt cooler to the touch than when she was happy, but she wasn't freezing and she wasn't losing control. She was slightly tense, but that was it. Last year at this time Elsa hadn't even had her coronation yet, and even right after the Great Thaw, she would not let Anna touch her hands when she was upset. Anna still felt bad about the whole cave incident thing, but she did feel better. Even if Elsa had regressed some, she was still far better now than she had been the summer before. She would just concentrate on helping her big sister heal inside so she _could_ be all right. So there.

Elsa finally broke the silence. "Let's just eat now. Our food is getting cold and I can't warm it up, obviously."

* * *

By that evening, Elsa felt like her magic was back to normal, so she finally decided to wake up Linnae, who was still asleep back in Weselton. After a tense few seconds, Elsa received a dragon-message (' _Hi Elsa. That drug pill thing is gone. I am sorry if I scared you. I am coming home now.'_ ) and instantly sighed in relief. She 'told' Linnae to message her again soon and eagerly told Anna about the news.

"That's great, Elsa," Anna replied sincerely. She still didn't like Linnae that much, especially after the dragon had dropped that tree on her and Elsa when they had gone camping, but she was happy Elsa was happy that the dragon was better. Anna's expression grew serious as she yanked Elsa into her room. She peeked into the hall before shutting and locking the door. "Elsa, there's something else I gotta tell you. It's important. I didn't want to tell you 'til you felt back to normal again, and-" Anna cut herself off, suddenly unsure she wanted to tell Elsa what she'd been about to say. Elsa just looked at her expectantly and said nothing. _I should tell Elsa. She's the queen-she_ has _to know._ "Well, that dumb Hans said some of those terrorist people had asked him to join them and that they wanted you," Anna said hesitantly.

"Then I'll have to investigate and go talk to him," Elsa said matter-of-factly. "Although, Anna, he's lied so many times already that I can't be particularly worried. The only reason I think he might be telling the truth is because we already know the bad terrorist people wanted me." She took a deep breath and sighed. "I suppose I will be paying Hans a visit in the dungeon."

"Elsa, wait. Take someone with you. Please. Like Kai or something. Please?" Anna asked hopefully.

Elsa nodded. "I'll ask Kai to go with me."

"Oh, yeah, and me and Kristoff are going over to the bookstore in the marketplace, 'kay? They close at eight thirty, I think, so we should be back around nine or so." Anna impulsively hugged Elsa close and just squeezed her tightly. _Maybe there are some psychology books that I could help Elsa with. I just want her to be all right. More than all right, I want her to be like she was when we were little._

"What was that all about?" Elsa asked when Anna let go of her a moment later. While Anna eagerly hugged her quite a lot, she usually didn't squeeze her so hard, either. Anna only did that when she was worried or something.

"Oh, nothing. Just that I want to help you to not be hurting anymore and I have a plan, so there," Anna told her proudly.

"And…it involves the bookstore how?"

"That's a secret for now!"

* * *

In the dungeon a few minutes later, Elsa got right to the point. "Hans, it seems that you told my sister and Kristoff about some sort of terrorist issue. I should like to hear about it," she said matter-of-factly, carefully saying as little specifics as possible to force Hans to give her those himself.

"Didn't figure you or your precious little sister or her boyfriend would ask," Hans replied in a carefully nonchalant voice.

"I do not have time for games," Elsa shot back instantly. "Look, logically, you have no reason to lie about it, because we will just stop you again. So I lean towards thinking you were telling the truth," she added in a more friendly tone.

Hans sat down casually, and Kai instantly made him stand up. "She is the queen. You _will_ respect her if I can help it," he ordered.

Elsa waved her hand dismissively, not particularly caring about usual protocol about such things. "He can sit if he wants. I merely want him to talk. If he chooses to sit while doing so, I couldn't care less."

"What happens if I don't talk?"

Elsa made her snowflake in one hand and raised one eyebrow, but said nothing.

"I am not scared of your magic, you know. You won't hurt me with it," Hans said confidently. He honestly wasn't the least bit nervous she would hurt him; she seemed to be completely in control now and she hated hurting others. Hans actually had full intentions of telling her everything he knew, but somehow it was fun to annoy her. He thought she looked cute when she was irritated.

Elsa kept her expression neutral, but she had a feeling he was annoying her on purpose for some reason. And yet it didn't particularly seem like Hans was being malicious or mean to her either, which didn't make sense. "Do just get to the point," she said flatly.

"What'll you give me if I tell you? Perhaps a dance once I've completed my sentence?"

Elsa instinctively backed away, her cheeks bright red. "I most certainly will not!" she exclaimed indignantly. "Hans, _why_ are you talking like this? You aren't even being…malicious or trying to hurt me. You're just being very…strange. Please stop this. All I want is the information you know. I don't play games."

Hans frowned. "You're almost twenty-two and you don't know," he stated. It wasn't a question. He suddenly actually felt bad for treating Elsa like that, so he decided to go ahead and tell her what she'd wanted to know without bothering her any more. "Some guy in a weird-looking suit came and gave me five hundred U.S. dollars and said there was more where that came from if I joined his terrorist group. He didn't call it a terrorist group, of course, but that is what it was. They wanted me to join them because they want you, and they thought I would know your weak spots. I told him to get lost, and he threatened to kill me."

"What did you tell them?" Elsa asked quietly.

"That you were terrified of heights and can't swim," Hans said, his green eyes sparkling. He was clearly pleased with himself. "So, look out for something involving those things." His expression grew serious as he added, "That man believed my lie, but I think he-and everyone else-knows what your biggest weakness is, El-Queen Elsa. That sister of yours. It's so obvious."

Elsa sighed. She knew quite well that Hans was right; no matter what he had said, it didn't matter. Everyone knew exactly what her real weakness was, and there was nothing she could do about that. At least-assuming Hans was telling her the truth-he hadn't said anything about her hating using her magic to fight. "Is there anything else?"

"No…well, yes. They don't want to kill you. They want a weapon, like what they did to your dragon. That was a test of some kind. I know not much drug or poison would be needed to affect you, so you had better watch what you eat and don't leave the castle alone." He paused before adding, "The man also said that if whatever their initial plan is doesn't work, they'll be able to convince the U.S. president to invade Arendelle and get to you that way."

Elsa thought for a minute, mulling over this new information. "If I _did_ get poisoned like that, I probably would hurt _them_ , too. Why would they want an enraged ice mage? I'd be out of control, and as everyone knows, that is _not_ a good thing." _And it'd be even worse since I_ can _control my powers now. I'd be horridly, unimaginably dangerous. Also…wait a second. Anna left with Kristoff to go to the bookstore. What if they try to kidnap her to get me?_

Hans just smirked. "Thing is, you wouldn't be out of control. Just an angry version of yourself. Your weird dragon is an animal, not a human. You'd probably be able to think far better under its influence than whatever happened when that dragon was like that. You'd be letting the dark side of you be in charge, like in your ice palace last year when you defended yourself against those Weselton guards."

Elsa kept her expression neutral, but she balled her hands into fists at her sides. "That is _not_ me," she said firmly. _It will never be me. Just…no. No, no, no._ She realized Kai was about to say something, and she shook her head lightly. She could handle this on her own. So there. Somehow Kai being there with her did make her feel better, though. If she _did_ do or say something stupid, he would stop her and make her go back upstairs. She was sure of it.

"Oh, no?" Hans questioned now. "Look, E-Queen Elsa, you're no monster. I didn't think that then-no matter what I actually said-and I certainly don't now. I told you what I did then because I _knew_ you would stop, so I could drop that chandelier on you. If you were a monster, that wouldn't have worked on you. But you _do_ have a dark side. Everyone does. You can't tell me some part of you didn't _like_ fighting back. Knowing you had the power to kick them out of your home. You were _angry_. Don't you realize that you actually had very precise control of your powers then?"

"The key to controlling my magic is love, not anger," Elsa shot back. "I never _wanted_ to kill those guards. I thought that it didn't matter at that point-if everyone thought I was a monster, then I may as well be what they wanted."

Hans crossed his arms. "I think your corny 'love' theory is just what controls your ability to _thaw_ your ice, not produce it. You know what else? I bet a drugged, poisoned you would kill me and anyone else you've been hurt or angered by, but that naïve sister of yours would be perfectly safe around you." He pointed at Elsa's feet, at the bit of yellow-and-purple-tinged ice on the floor. "Look what you're doing right now. Seems like your palace turned yellow when you were mad."

Elsa's pale face turned white, and she instinctively looked to Kai for help. _What am I so worried about? Hans never told me the truth before. Why would he now?_ And then, _But he_ is _telling the truth. I can tell. That creep isn't lying this time._

Kai put a supportive arm around Elsa's shoulders and just stared Hans right in the face. "You may be telling the truth about the terrorist issue, young man, but I will not have you saying such nonsense about Queen Elsa. Not to mention I could hardly think badly of her if she chose to execute you after what you've done. That is no 'dark side' talking; it's a fact. You've tried to kill her; you've kidnapped her multiple times, among other things. She is the queen. According to most any country's law, she would be well within her rights to have you executed. Also, if you knew her powers as well as you fancy you do, you would see that her ice wasn't merely yellow just now-it was mostly purple."

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"It turns purple when I am sad," Elsa admitted softly. She managed to dissolve the bit of ice, but she still wished she hadn't made a power mistake in front of Hans at all. Even now, when she knew he wasn't really trying to hurt her, he was purposely pushing her buttons. That _did_ make her angry.

"Why on earth would you have made 'sad ice'?!" Hans asked, genuinely puzzled.

"Because I don't believe killing is ever the answer! I don't want to kill the people who have hurt me or made me angry. I just want them to go away and leave me alone if they won't change." Elsa paused before adding a simple, "That's the truth." _I don't want to be like that. Not ever. I don't want to be dangerous._

Hans suddenly gave Elsa a genuine smile, and she backed up in surprise. "What if they _do_ change? Would you give _me_ a chance?"

Elsa remembered what Anna had told her earlier-that Hans liked her-and she stiffened all over. The last thing she needed was someone she absolutely did _not_ trust or want to spend time with at all trying to flirt with her or dance with her or something. She didn't want that. He probably just liked her simply because she was the queen anyway. "You have no right to ask me that," she said finally, in her best dignified and standoffish 'queen' voice.

"I know that. Can't hurt to ask, though." Hans shrugged and went to look out the window. _What did I expect her to say?_ "Well, you'll be a great girl for some lucky guy sometime."

Elsa laid a hand on Kai's arm to keep him from interfering; she could tell Kai was _very_ angry with Hans for not staying in his place. He _didn't_ have any right to say things like that. "Hans, I will not be a 'great girl' for _anyone_ , not just you. I'm fine on my own. Period," she stated, in a less standoffish tone.

"All girls say that and then change their minds," Hans replied with great certainty. "They always get with somebody eventually. Maybe you'll say something different a month from now."

Elsa scowled. "That is a sexist and ridiculously asinine thing to say. I said I am not interested, not with you, not with anyone. Is that really so difficult to understand?" She detested people saying things like that; it reminded her of the proposals she had received via letter back when she was about nineteen and said she needed help because she was still grieving from her parents' "death".

"If you _did_ change your mind, would you give me a chance?"

Elsa replied instantly. "No. You hurt my sister. You left her to die. I can forgive you for kidnapping me; I can forgive you for trying to kill me. But you hurt Anna, and she really trusted you. You broke her heart and made her upset, and you left her in the library to die." Elsa took a deep breath before continuing. She didn't consider herself angry with Hans anymore; she had forgiven him; but if she was honest with herself, she had to admit she was indeed still a bit angry with him for what he had done to Anna. "Hans, forgetting any of that, _I can't trust you_. I believe that you really are trying to reform, but a bit of me would always be wondering if you're telling me the truth. If you're trying to manipulate me. If you're up to something. If you're after my throne. If you're going to hurt me like you did Anna. I would _never_ be able to fully trust you. A relationship has to be based on trust, and I can't do that. I'm sorry." _That's the truth. That would never, ever work._

Hans nodded and said nothing for a moment. His charm routine wouldn't work on Elsa; he knew that. So he didn't grin at her or smirk or run his fingers through his hair or anything else. "I guess I was just…hoping. Since you said you forgave me and all. I like you. You aren't just cute or pretty either-you aren't stupid. You're…alluring."

"There's a difference between forgiveness and being stupidly trusting," Elsa said quietly. She just shook her head. _Hans must be crazy. I'm sure it must have been hard to tell me those things, but I don't get it. He has to understand why I said 'no way', right?_

"Fair enough. I wouldn't trust me either," Hans said bitterly.

Elsa frowned; Hans sounded genuinely upset now and while she knew she had said nothing wrong, she didn't like knowing she had made someone else that upset. Not even Hans. He almost looked like he was about to cry. She bit her lip as she limped over to him and tried her best not to cringe when she touched his arm. _I'm trying to make someone I want absolutely nothing to do with feel better. Maybe I am being too nice…_ "Hans, just because I am not the right girl for you doesn't mean there isn't someone else out there for you. If you _really_ are a changed man, another girl will be able to trust you. Just not me. Please don't 'wait' for me, because it's not happening. I can _promise_ you it won't. Go find someone else once you're free again, and don't…hurt her."

Hans said nothing for a minute and just nodded. Of course Elsa had turned him down; what had he been expecting? The girl was being as kind as could be, but nothing he did or said was going to change her mind. And he couldn't blame her, either. She had expressed very simply and logically her exact reasons for saying no, and everything she had said was true. "Could I at least have the honor of dancing with you just once sometime?" he asked finally.

"Would you like me to step on your toes? I don't dance, Hans. You can ask Kai," Elsa informed him matter-of-factly. _I really don't want to dance with him anyway-that thought makes me cringe. But that's the truth. I can't dance._

Kai chuckled at that. "Queen Elsa is telling the truth, although I don't want her dancing with the likes of you anyway." Quite honestly, he hated seeing Elsa be so nice to someone that had treated her like Hans had done in the past. If he had been in Elsa's shoes, he would have slapped Hans in the face for asking and saying these sorts of things. And yet he was proud of Elsa too; she hadn't let Hans's sweet-talking and charm affect her in any way. She was just being herself. _I know I can trust Elsa not to let Hans change her mind. Good job, Elsa._

Hans's face turned red. "I just asked her a question. I'm _trying_ to be honest and change. I already know she's probably not the best at dancing. I just don't care," he said a bit huffily.

Elsa had no intentions of accepting any dance, but she didn't want to give yet another 'no', so she simply nodded politely and said she had something she needed to do. _Awkward. So awkward. I knew there was a reason I made a point to stay away from Hans entirely. Good grief._

 **A/N: And that is why HansxElsa will never work. She can't trust him. I have addressed that pairing once and for all. What Elsa told him-that if he really has changed, he can find happiness elsewhere, is true. It just won't be with Elsa. She would never be able to trust him, and really, why should she? Anyways, I apologize to any of my readers that were hoping they might get together eventually, but I just don't see how it could ever work, and here Elsa explained her reasons why. (And for everyone else, no worries-this is not going to be one of those cliché I-don't-like-you-at-first-and-will-change-my-mind-later romance things. Elsa said she isn't interested in _anyone_ , and that even if she did change her mind on that eventually, she will not be with Hans. That won't be changing. That's that.:P)**

 **And gear up for the final showdown soon, and get ready for some Elsa kicking butt.:) Remember no one wants to see angry Elsa...**

 **Next chapter coming soon!**


	36. Chapter 36

**A/N: Thanks to everyone who's followed/favorited and/or is reading but not reviewing:)**

 **IndyGirl89-I PMed you so I won't repeat myself here and make you reread it, lol:P**

 **Love Elsa a lot-Sorry, I like things to be logical even if it's about magic.:)**

 **Elsa Tomago-I PMed you so I won't make you reread the same thing here:)**

 **moohamquest-That's a sore spot for Elsa-she just wants everyone to respect Anna.:)**

 **FluffyKitten-Well, Nikoleta will be a bit standoffish around Elsa for a little while, but no big deal. Elsa gets huffy when people don't give Anna the same respect they are willing to give her, and to be fair she wasn't all that nice to her friend, lol. Thank you:) And yes, both Elsa and Linnae are okay at the moment. Eh, I can't feel bad for Hans after everything he's done. I must say I was quite pleased after Elsa very politely dissed his attempts to get her to return his feelings. Sorry not sorry Hans, that's not happening. Elsa cannot trust you. And no, I don't think Elsa will ever marry. It's just not her thing, and I think a lot of people would just take advantage of her. I just don't think a romantic relationship would be in-character or good for her at all. Well, watch out for angry-Elsa in this chapter and the next.:P**

 **Poor Queen Elsa-While I do see your point, I don't agree. I think little Elsa (pre-accident) DID have full control of her magic. She hits Anna because Anna won't slow down and tries unsuccessfully to catch her, not because she cannot control her magic. And, as for the Let It Go sequence, she's kept her magic bottled up inside for 13 years-so of course she has plenty of power stored to do all of those things. Notice she doesn't thaw anything in that sequence. She merely CREATES things. What Elsa doesn't know how to do at that point is thaw what she makes, not the actual production of said things. Elsa is scared when she shoots the icicles in the ballroom. She's happy (at least mostly) on the North Mountain; she thinks she can let her magic out without hurting anyone there. Since it's easy for Elsa to control her magic when she's happy, she's able to build her ice palace and everything with no problem. When she hits Anna in the heart, she did that when she was literally having a panic attack. She tried to stop the storm, pulled it all inside her, and then it all exploded out of her again. There is no way she could really control her magic in that state even if she did know the key to controlling her powers. And, I have watched Avatar:The Last Airbender, and the bending in the series doesn't seem to work anything like Elsa's magic does. Since the powers are different I do not think that is a fair comparison.:)**

 **On to the story!**

Elsa headed upstairs, only to find a distraught Gerda waiting for her. "Gerda, what's the matter?"

"Miss Elsa, your kitty is hurt," Gerda replied worriedly, hurrying Elsa toward the kitchen. "I was dumping some old lemonade outside and I found her. I put her in here next to the oven since it's warm. But-" Gerda was interrupted by Elsa's horrified scream.

Elsa had instantly sat down on the floor next to Kolfinnia the second she'd seen her, angry tears filling her blue eyes. "What happened? Did some wild animal chew her leg?" she asked. _I don't think an animal would have done that…a wild animal probably would have…eaten her or something._ She shuddered at that thought. At least Kolfinnia was alive and didn't seem to be particularly frightened or anything.

"I don't think so, honey," Gerda said gently. "There was a note tied to her tail. A human did it to her."

"Why would someone hurt Kolfinnia like that? She's just an innocent cat, and-"

"And she's _yours_ , Miss Elsa. She was targeted to hurt you. There's something else, too. Look at the note."

Elsa sighed and took the note. She crumpled the note in her fist seconds later, her expression scared but determined. "That Hans was telling the truth. They're after me and Anna's in danger. Gerda, get Rapunzel _now_. I know you weren't sure who it was okay to tell, but I want Kolfinnia to be all right. Rapunzel can fix her."

* * *

"Miss Elsa, you cannot leave the castle right now," Kai told her minutes later. "Gerda told you she sent a dozen guards out to look for your sister. They'll find her. We know she was going to the bookstore, so we have a place to start."

"I can leave the castle, and I will. I will not just sit around while Anna might be being…kidnapped or worse. You saw Kolfinnia." Elsa set her mouth in a determined line and awkwardly climbed onto Linnae, who had returned by then. "Olaf is most likely at my ice palace. Linnae and I will get Olaf, and then he can find Anna for us."

"Miss Elsa, listen to me. I think that renegade prince was telling the truth. We can't risk you being hurt or poisoned like that. You have a lot of…pain in your past, and I have no wish to see what an angry version of you would do," Kai told her.

"I'm wearing my ice-armor. They can't shoot me," Elsa responded. "And you would be safe around angry-me," she added quietly.

"Your neck, face, and hands are showing. That's enough. A small dart containing whatever the drug or poison is can still hit you. Miss Elsa, Linnae got poisoned somehow, and she is covered in your impenetrable ice. That's not good enough. Not to mention, you got very little sleep last night in Weselton, and now you're going out again tonight. Send Linnae instead and order her not to eat _anything_ , and keep her big dragon mouth shut so nothing can get inside her that way." Kai frowned as he helped Elsa down. "And, Miss Elsa, it's not me that I would be worried about, or even our citizens. It's the building damage, and the very, very good chance that you could wipe out an army in a minute."

"I have to help look for Anna! I shouldn't have let her leave in the first place!" Elsa exclaimed, trying to pull herself away from Kai. "Let me go! Please!"

"I can't order you to stay here, Miss Elsa, but you really need to stay here at home. If the same people that hurt your cat _do_ have your sister, they can't kill her without losing their leverage against you," Kai said firmly. "They'd just be asking for trouble and making you retaliate.

But Elsa shook her head, suddenly absolutely sure of something. _But they_ want _me to retaliate…_ "Kai…these people are the same ones that want to make me some angry, dark version of myself. They _want_ me to retaliate. That means they may very well hurt or…o-or kill Anna, just to get to me. I'd be giving them what they want by going after them, yes, but…but Anna's life is _not_ safe. This isn't the same thing as what every other time this sort of thing has happened was. I know it's not." Elsa's big blue eyes were filled with tears as she decided exactly what she needed to do. "Get Rapunzel and Eugene and send them home to Corona on Linnae. Linnae knows what she needs to do so she's not poisoned again, so it will be safe. Then assume my authority 'til I get back. Here." Elsa quickly created a small sheet-of-paper-sized ice and etched a message on it. "There. Now nobody can question your decisions, either." She signed her name at the bottom and then handed it to Kai. "I don't think anyone can argue that that's not official."

"Miss Elsa. Slow down. If you _are_ right, then they must have some way to neutralize you until they want you. Then we'll have you _and_ your sister missing." Kai frowned as Elsa shook her head and headed straight toward the gates. _No matter what I say, Elsa will still leave. This is exactly what that little scoundrel meant when he said everyone knew exactly what Elsa's weakness was. She just wants Anna back home safe._ "At least promise me you'll defend yourself if need be."

Elsa stopped in her tracks and gave a single abrupt nod. "Just not at the expense of Anna's or anyone else's safety," she said softly without turning around. Then she kept walking.

* * *

Once outside the gates, Elsa leaned against the castle wall, letting herself blend into the dark shadows as she tried to think exactly what she should do that would give her the best chances of finding Anna. If she was lucky, her castle guards would have found Anna and Kristoff at that bookstore and were bringing them home right now. At worst, Anna was already gone and the bad people that had her were just waiting for Elsa herself to show up. _Come on, Elsa, be logical. If you were the bad terrorist people, what would you do?_

Elsa was still thinking when her sharp eyes noticed a masked figure in dark clothes nearby. She waited, pretending to be oblivious, until the someone was nearly on top of her before letting her magic spring into action. In less than a second ice encased the figure up to its neck. _Don't say anything, Elsa. Make him-her?-talk first._ She did, however, yank the mask off the person's head. It was a girl that probably wasn't even her age.

"Looks like I backed the wrong side for the amount of money I'm getting," the girl deadpanned in English. Elsa thought she had a bit of a Scottish accent, but she wasn't completely sure.

Elsa raised one eyebrow skeptically. "What, exactly, were you being paid to do?" she asked. If this girl was just being paid by the bad terrorist people, she probably wasn't particularly loyal to them; she just wanted her money.

The girl looked Elsa right in the face. She was actually a bit shorter than Elsa, who wasn't really all that tall herself. "Just knock you out and take you to the dock. Give you some serum thing," she said casually. "I need money for my brothers and me to get a-back home. If I help you instead, will you let me go and help me rescue my brothers? Name's Meri."

Elsa frowned. "How do I know you won't betray me as easily as you did your previous employer?" she asked, although she was certain the girl wasn't lying.

"You could always freeze me like you just did," Meri said truthfully. She actually didn't like her 'previous employers', but she needed the money.

Elsa nodded curtly and freed the girl. "Take me to my sister then." She briefly worried Meri was merely trying to get her trust just to stab her in the back when she had the chance, but she tried to stuff that worry away. Right now Meri was her best chance to get to Anna quickly.

Meri started toward the dock, and Elsa immediately frowned a minute later. "The dock is where you said you were supposed to take me. I am not following you there," she said firmly.

"Well, that's where they'll take your sister. They won't have gotten back yet, though."

"Then we will intercept them on the way. I am not putting one toe on any boat or ship," Elsa replied instantly. She yelped when Meri abruptly yanked her into the shadows. "What are you doing?!" she hissed in frustration. "I don't have time to waste-I need to find An-"

Meri merely clapped her hand over Elsa's mouth. "I'm not getting myself shot for you. They're coming. You rescue Anna yourself. I'm not having anything to do with it," she whispered. Then just like that, she slunk into an alley. "Go on."

* * *

Elsa sighed and brushed her sweaty palms on her skirt. _I can do this. But make sure they have Anna before doing anything, Elsa. Don't be stupid._ She stepped into the moonlight, allowing the small group to see her. "Stop in the name of the queen!" she ordered in her most authoritative voice. _One, two, three, four, five, six. One big struggling sack. One…small stumbling cloak-person._

Before Elsa could decide what she wanted to do next, she felt a small sting on her neck. _That's what Kai was worried about?_ she thought absently. Then just as quickly, she felt two shapes slam her to the ground, and she hit her head hard on the cobblestones. Head spinning, she instinctively lashed out with her magic instead. Ice exploded from her hands, and a wave of deathly cold hurricane-force wind literally threw the two assailants away from her. "What were you _thinking_ attacking _me_?" she spat in disgust. Another wave of her hand and the other four would-be kidnappers were flung against the nearest building's brick wall. They crumpled to the ground. "Such incompetent imbeciles trying to steal _my_ sister. You are going to pay for that!" she shouted. _That's not me, that's not what I would say,_ Elsa thought, slightly panicked. She suddenly realized that those bad people had indeed succeeded in getting whatever serum Meri had mentioned into her. They had just failed to move quickly enough after the fact. This realization made her roll her eyes-they were _so_ ridiculously stupid-until she remembered exactly what she had been confronting them about.

 _Anna. I'm rescuing Anna,_ she thought. Elsa spun around to see Anna kneeling on the ground, struggling to free her hands. In a second, Elsa had frozen the rope off Anna's wrists, and she instinctively hugged her little sister close. "I'll make those repulsive idiots pay," she muttered, half to herself and half to Anna.

"Kristoff…in the…bag," Anna said hesitantly. "They-they hurt him." She pulled away from Elsa and began searching her face. Elsa wasn't being…Elsa. Anna spotted the small mark on her sister's neck and immediately knew what was wrong. "Elsa, you…you gotta stay you. Don't not be…Elsa," she said softly.

"I am me." Elsa's blue eyes filled with angry tears when she saw Anna's face. She balled her hands into first and whipped around, more feeling than seeing those bad people recovered and coming up on her again. " _Nobody_ hurts my sister! You will not lay one finger on her!" she nearly screamed. She whipped her hand out and instantaneously all but one of them were encased in ice. The final one-the one she thought was the leader-she held out her hand again like she was choking something and freezing cold air squeezed around his neck. _Elsa, stop it. You've never even done that before in your life. How are you choking some big guy with your magic?_

 _Who cares? He hurt Anna. I have the right to execute him for that. He's lucky I haven't killed him already._ In a second she had literally thrown him and all of the others over the castle wall in one swift motion, and she instinctively yelped and tried to make a cushion of snow beneath them. She didn't want to kill those people. She didn't. So there.

Elsa turned back to Anna, who was now trying to help Kristoff out of the sack. "They are taken care of," she said proudly.

Anna just stared at her. "Elsa…why'd you do that? You didn't have to and you know it," she said quietly.

"They hurt you and wanted to kidnap us," Elsa said stubbornly, crossing her arms. "They should die."

Anna looked to Kristoff for help, but he only shrugged. "Maybe Dark Elsa is right," he muttered, rubbing his head. Not only did he have no interest in making a drugged, angry Elsa mad at _him_ , those people kind of probably did deserve a bit of fear knocked into them. It'd serve them right if Elsa-even if it was merely her angry self-hurt them.

Elsa nodded in satisfaction. "See, Anna, he agrees with me. Those people were bad. I don't want them hurting you any more."

* * *

"I think we have a problem on our hands," Kai said to Gerda inside the castle courtyard. He frowned as he looked down at the literal pile of people he knew were the ones that Elsa had been going after to get Anna back. The pile of snow beneath them told Kai that Elsa was still at least partly in control of herself, but the fact that she had thrown them all over the wall did not bode well. He wondered if they were all even still alive. While Kai thought that Elsa's usual self was too merciful, this wasn't the way he wanted her to be either. If any of these people were indeed dead, Elsa would get horribly upset and most likely hurt herself or something if she realized what she had done when she was back to normal. Kai took a deep breath before instructing some guards to get all of the people into the dungeon as quickly as possible. "Must be done before Queen Elsa returns," he said firmly. _I'll figure out what to do with them later. First priority is to keep Elsa…herself until whatever happened to her wears off._

* * *

"Elsa, listen to me. That isn't something my sweet big sister wants to do," Anna said firmly. "You do _not_ want to go to Weselton and fuss at Dad. You want to come home and go to sleep 'til you feel back to normal again." She was sure 'Dark Elsa', as Kristoff had dubbed her, wouldn't hurt _her_ , but a lot of other people were definitely not safe around her, and certainly not their parents.

"I want to go home and make sure you are okay," Elsa said flatly. A moment later, she had created a ramp right over to and over the castle wall. Another flick of her wrist and a sled big enough for her, Anna, and Kristoff appeared. "Get in."

Meri decided she would wait a couple days and approach Elsa again once she was back to her usual self. She would be one of the people that were not safe around Elsa at the moment.

* * *

"I'll freeze them!" Elsa said, sounding half-upset and half-angry a few minutes later.

Anna grabbed her sister's cold hands and just held them tightly. "Elsa, Dr. Raske said I was fine, remember?" Elsa had said the same thing every time she looked at the bruises on Anna's face and arms. "Look at me, Elsa. I. Am. Fine. They are just bruises and stuff."

"If I freeze them, they can't hurt you or anyone else ever again," Elsa replied logically. She seemed to be looking off into the distance as she added, "They hurt Anna. I have to defend her. That's my job."

"You did, Elsa. Now come on and put on some nightclothes and go to bed. Get rid of the ice-armor, all right?"

"I don't want to," was Elsa's childish-sounding response.

"Ok, fine. Go to bed and wear your silly uncomfortable ice-armor then," Anna told her. "You told me it wasn't comfortable last time. Just go to bed, Elsa." She sighed in relief as Elsa nodded and disappeared into the bathroom…then realized Elsa had not taken her usual nightgown into the bathroom with her.

Elsa came back seconds later dressed in some sparkly drapey thing that made Kristoff blush and look away. Anna yelped and threw a blanket around her. "Elsa, what on earth _is_ that?! I don't care if you sleep in some ice-fabric clothes, but that is _not_ appropriate!" She knew Elsa's magic did some funny things when she tried to make clothes-had teased her about it, even-but her modest big sister would have been horrified once she realized what she was wearing.

Sure enough, "real-Elsa" peeked through a moment later, and Elsa's pale cheeks turned red. _What did I_ do _?!_ "I'm sorry," she whispered, and grabbed her usual blue nightgown from her drawer and went back into the bathroom, her face still beet red.

Once Elsa was gone, Anna couldn't help laughing. "You two should have seen your faces!" she teased Kristoff. "You turned almost as red as silly ol' Elsa did!"

"That thing she was wearing looked…um…"

"Revealing?" Anna offered.

"Yeah. And that might be fine if it was you but it wasn't-oh, man, I just said the wrong thing, didn't I?" Kristoff rubbed his still sore head in confusion, half not even believing what was going on. "I feel like a brother to her, so that was just weird. And yet she didn't seem to be acting all…slinky either, y'know what I mean?"

Anna nodded and blushed herself. Elsa would kill her if she thought her little sister and Kristoff were…doing things, engaged or not. They weren't 'doing things', but still. "I don't think Elsa _knows_ how to be 'slinky'," she said quietly. "I'll bet she just thought 'I want a nightgown' and that thing was what her magic gave her. And since she's not entirely…herself, she didn't realize there was something wrong with it."

* * *

Elsa came back a minute later, her cheeks still slightly pink and her hands clasped demurely in front of her. She went straight to Anna and just said quickly before she could change her mind, "I need you to let me borrow some gloves and promise to do…something to me should I try to hurt someone. I don't care what, just do _something._ Anna, I think…I think I killed one of those bad people. I…I'm scared." _I wanted to go to Weselton and hurt Papa. I do_ not _want to do that._ A single tear trickled down her cheek, and she didn't bother to wipe it away. "Please don't leave me alone. Please." Elsa knew she needed an anchor of sorts to keep her from lashing out. That anchor was Anna. Even now she could feel the 'Dark Elsa' trying to get out. That Elsa wanted to go find all of the people that had hurt her and Anna and go eliminate them.

The sad part was that Elsa knew she could _easily_ do that if she chose to. She probably didn't even need to leave the castle to do so. A sick sense of satisfaction welled within her- _what do you think of that, you weak, pitiful girl? you could be powerful! you could eliminate all of the evil villains in the world with a flick of the wrist! you could be an empress! Papa wouldn't be able to say you aren't good enough anymore!-_ and she shoved it away.

Anna opened her mouth, about to say that gloves wouldn't help, that that had never helped, that Elsa could freeze through metal, so that was dumb…but she didn't. _Whatever keeps Elsa sane right now. This can't last but more than a couple days-I heard those creeps say so. I just have to help her get through those days, that's all._ "I promise I won't leave you alone, but I'm not promising to hurt you if need be," she said gently. "Kristoff, please go grab some gloves from my room. Check the floor under the dresser."

Kristoff decided not to ask Anna why there would be gloves on the floor under her dresser. Better he didn't know. He knew Anna was messy.

"And keep everyone but you, Kristoff, Gerda, and Kai away from me," Elsa added. She suddenly stiffened. "I don't need to keep anyone away from me. They had better just keep out of my way," she said in a flat voice. "I can do whatever I like. Nobody has the authority to tell me what to do." _Elsa, that is technically true, but just stop it. You don't need to act like that and you know it._

 _Why shouldn't I?_ Not _doing anything to stand up for myself when I was little just made me a wreck inside. I don't want that anymore. I want to be strong so that never happens again. And I want to keep Anna safe, no matter what._

"Shh, Elsa, just go to sleep," Anna said quietly. "You're right-nobody has the authority to do that, but you don't have to be all snobby, either. That's not you." _How do I help her? It's like she's still Elsa and yet she's not._ Anna wasn't sure what she should do or say to help.

Elsa willingly climbed under the covers, but she seemed tense and confused somehow. A bit of her was terrified that her magic would do something bad and she wouldn't even know about it, like when she'd frozen everything the year before. She held her hands close to her chest, stubbornly keeping her palms towards herself. _Don't you dare mess up, Elsa. Don't hurt Anna. Don't hurt anyone else, either._

 _I don't need to worry about that. I can control it now, so stop bothering me. Who cares what happens as long as Anna is safe?_ She scrunched her eyes shut and pressed her hands over her ears, as if that would make her inner arguments disappear. "I just don't want to be that weak, pitiful girl people feel sorry for. There's nothing wrong with that! I could just get rid of all those bad people and…and…" Elsa blinked in confusion when she felt warm arms just holding her close. "Anna? My powers-they…they might do something, and-"

"No, they won't. Even if they did, you could fix it," Anna said firmly. She bit her own lip to keep from crying herself; she could feel Elsa was literally trembling, like she wouldn't be able to hold herself back much longer. "Think about something else. Something that makes you happy. Something warm, maybe." Anna knew even 'Dark Elsa' did not want to hurt her. She would not leave Elsa alone. She'd promised she wouldn't. Anna looked up when she heard footsteps and mouthed thank-you to Kristoff. "Here, Elsa. You wanted some stupid gloves. Here you go."

Elsa did not react beyond tensing up all over. She didn't want gloves, not one bit. _Why does Anna want you to hide who you are, Elsa? She's just scared of how powerful you can be._

 _I TOLD her to bring them in here! Stop it!_

 _This will show everyone who you really can be,_ the 'other' voice said in a pleased sort of way. Elsa felt a pleasant tingling in her very bones, an intense version of what she usually felt whenever she used her magic, and she abruptly sat up straight. "Anna…Anna, my magic just did something. What happened?" she asked worriedly. "It did something-I felt it-and…and there's no mess in here, and…" _What happened?! I have to know!_ Another, stronger wave of the same sensation flowed through her, and she panicked. Snowflakes began swirling around her, and she pushed Anna away, worried something might happen to her, too. _I don't want to deal with this again!_

Anna wrapped a blanket around Elsa and just put both hands on her cold shoulders, looking right into the older girl's blue eyes. "Elsa. Elsa, look at me. I don't know what your powers did, but whatever it is, you can reverse it. I know you can. Everything's gonna be all right. You can hold it back. I'm right here for you. Can you-" Anna yelped as she felt herself flung across the room…into a pile of soft powdery snow. _What on earth, Elsa? What are you doing?_

"Maybe I don't want to reverse it! And _don't_ tell me to 'hold it back'! You sound just like Papa!" Elsa shouted. " 'Conceal it, Elsa. Don't feel it. Don't let it show. Hold it in, Elsa. You can do it!' I _hate_ that!" Tears trickled down her cheeks as she limped over to Anna. "You don't think I'm good enough, either." She sensed rather than saw Kristoff marching over to them and instantly froze him in place. "You l-left me all a-alone in that cave. I _trusted_ you!" Elsa held out her right hand towards Anna, glowing and pulsing with icy blue magic. _Elsa, stop it! That wasn't Anna's fault! Don't hurt her!_

Anna just stared, stunned speechless for a minute before recovering herself. _I got to calm Elsa down. She's not just angry, she's…hurting._ "Elsa, I'm not going to hurt you to keep from, uh, doing whatever it is you're doing with that magic," she said softly.

Elsa didn't move.

"I love you," Anna went on, reaching for Elsa's free hand.

Elsa jerked her hand away, but she still didn't move otherwise. She glanced from the magic in her hand to Anna to the magic again and bit her lip. _I know what I can do._ Elsa took one more step towards Anna; then hesitated again and turned her back on Anna, still holding out her hand, her body tense all over as she fought the nasty instinct inside her. _You don't want to do that, Elsa. What for? You haven't done anything wrong. You_ should _use your power to do whatever you want._

 _No, I love Anna. I don't want to hurt anyone. So there. I'm doing it. If I knock myself out, I won't hurt anyone else, either._

Anna frowned when she realized just what Elsa was doing. _She's going to try to use that on herself instead!_ Sure enough, before Anna could protest, Elsa forcefully slammed her hand to her head and almost instantly collapsed. "Elsa! Elsa, what did you _do_?!" Anna screamed desperately, pulling Elsa into her arms. She tried to tug Elsa's hand away from her head, but the older girl wouldn't budge. Anna continued yanking on Elsa's hand, terrified of what Elsa might have done to herself. How could Elsa have used her magic on herself anyway? That didn't make any sense. "Elsa…" Anna saw a clear grimace of pain on her sister's face just before she went limp all over, her hand finally dropping from her head. "You're…you're smiling now," Anna whispered.

It was true. Elsa had her usual lopsided smile on her face now, although she was clearly unconscious. Anna was mostly just relieved her big sister was still breathing, although her head was bleeding badly where she'd channeled that magic into herself like that. "Elsa, why did you do that? There had to have been another way," Anna muttered.

* * *

Kristoff finally managed to break himself free of Elsa's ice just as Gerda came running in. "She was about to…hurt Anna with her magic and then chose to use it on herself instead," he told Gerda.

"Gerda, fix Elsa. Please! She…she was so upset. She was acting all mad, but she was stuttering and crying…" Anna's voice trailed off.

Gerda frowned as she gently touched Elsa's head. "I think we need to get Dr. Raske to look at that. What exactly did Miss Elsa do?"

"Shoved a bunch of strong magic into her head where it didn't want to go," Kristoff said matter-of-factly. "I saw it. Elsa's magic was fighting her because her body is mostly immune to it. She overrode that and did it anyway. It would be like you forcing yourself to knock yourself out with a steel bar or something, except a lot worse. Elsa must have a tremendous amount of willpower." He had been angry with Elsa for being about to hurt Anna, but after seeing what she had ultimately done, he was just impressed. Nobody had _made_ her not hurt Anna, she had shoved 'Dark Elsa' aside long enough to protect Anna and eliminate the danger to everyone else, too. "We should take her to the trolls…"

Gerda had already run out of the room to get the doctor, leaving Kristoff and Anna alone with an unconscious Elsa. "Kristoff, why was Elsa able to fight the serum and I couldn't fight Jade's fire magic?" Anna asked sadly.

"Because it's some lousy chemical thing, not magic, that's all. You said you were able to fight that fire magic for awhile, too. It's only been a few hours since Elsa got that serum in her. She may not have been able to do what she just did, say, tomorrow. Also…how do I put this…from hearing Dark Elsa talk, it was mostly just an angry little kid talking." Kristoff sighed, not sure how to explain what he was thinking. "It was not what I imagined a dark _anyone_ to be from that serum stuff. At all. From the way those crazy idiots were talking, it sounded like it turned people into your stereotypical mwahahaha sort of villains."

"She wanted to be 'powerful' so nobody could say she wasn't good enough ever again. So nobody could hurt her," Anna whispered. She smiled ruefully as she added, "I'm glad Elsa didn't turn into a stereotypical 'mwahahaha villain', as you put it, but it makes me sad that an angry, so-called 'evil' version of Elsa was just…what we saw. That Elsa _was_ dangerous, but she wasn't 'evil'. She was like an angry, hurting little kid, just like you said. What if real-Elsa feels like that?"

* * *

"Anna, I'm going to go talk to Grand Pabbie," Kristoff said a few minutes later. "He can tell us what exactly Elsa did to herself. She probably did something similar as when she froze your head when you guys were little."

Anna frowned and glanced at Elsa, who really just looked like she was sleeping now. She hadn't stirred at all when Dr. Raske took care of her head or when Gerda tucked her into bed. "Then don't the trolls need to heal her head?" Anna asked. "And Elsa didn't give me any visible boo-boo of any kind when she did that. I know she didn't."

"Yeah, they would, except that Elsa's magic won't accept his. So Grand Pabbie can't heal her. And like I said before, her magic didn't want her to do that. She forced it under her skin-it didn't just go naturally like if she did that to someone else," Kristoff explained, a hundred percent sure he was right. "That's why it tore up her head like that." Kristoff wasn't a magic expert, but he knew quite a bit about the trolls' magic and general magic rules. A natural mage was ordinarily _always_ immune to his or her own magic, case closed. Forcing it, like Elsa had done, just wasn't possible without a huge amount of control and willpower.

"But…but how's Elsa going to get better if the trolls can't heal her? She won't…die, will she?" Anna gave Elsa's hand a squeeze, but of course she didn't react.

Kristoff bit his lip, unsure what to say. He didn't think Elsa's life was in danger-there _had_ to be a way to help her-but he didn't know how to do that, either. "I don't know how we can help her, Anna. That's why I'm going to go to the valley," he said finally.

Anna said nothing, but her blue-green eyes filled with tears. Once Kristoff was gone, Gerda just touched her shoulder gently. "I can sit with Miss Elsa, princess. Why don't you try to get some sleep?" Gerda suggested.

"She did this to herself to keep from hurting me," Anna whispered. "Whatever angry part of her said I didn't think she was good enough, either, 'just like Papa'. Then that I left her all alone in that cave and that she trusted me…" _I knew that incident was still bothering her._

"Miss Anna, she was just scared. I think we all know the poor girl already thinks she's 'not good enough' and is scared of everyone else thinking the same thing. Since she was under the influence of that drug thing, she lashed out instead of getting all upset or panicking or something, that's all," Gerda said gently. "It's not your fault."

"I told Elsa she could 'hold it back', Gerda. I just meant in the sense she could control her magic even with the serum thing, but I think that's not what Elsa took it as," Anna said, still holding her sister's hand. _That's exactly what it is. I triggered her because Dad told her that kind of thing in another context._

Gerda shook her head. "That may have been a bad choice of words, but it still isn't your fault any more than it is hers. That credit goes to your father, and you know it. Miss Elsa will understand what you meant once she's herself again. I know she will."

"What if she doesn't wake up?"

"What sort of nonsense is that? Of course she will," Gerda said firmly. "If I had to guess-and I could be wrong-she'll wake up once her magic calms down completely. I have no idea if that would be before or after that drug mess works its way out of her system, but I _really_ think she will be perfectly fine." She gave the princess a reassuring smile as she added, "Go to sleep, Miss Anna. I'll wake you if there's any change, I promise."

* * *

SEVERAL HOURS LATER…

"Grand Pabbie said it sounded like Elsa had pretty much given herself the magically derived equivalent of a bad concussion," Kristoff told Gerda quietly. "I'm surprised you got Anna to go to sleep," he added in surprise. Anna was indeed fast asleep, one arm wrapped protectively around her unconscious sibling.

"And? What do we do for her?" Gerda asked.

"Well, he said she ought to wake up by morning, and that she might be confused and stuff. Basically we're just supposed to treat Elsa the same way we would if she _had_ gotten a concussion. He thinks her body may have somehow been allergic to whatever chemical serum those people got into her and that partly made her stay unconscious for so long. Also he said she must be getting closer to being an ice master too. And that there were 'several ventures Queen Elsa must tend to' once she's better. Pabbie also said she may not remember what happened, either." Kristoff shrugged. "That could be good. If she doesn't remember it can't hurt her."

Gerda shushed him, knowing full well that Elsa might very well be able to hear him even if she couldn't respond yet. "Thank you. You go to bed as well now. Thank you for being willing to help her."

* * *

Elsa finally stirred around dawn, a very tired Gerda still watching her. She immediately began turning her head from side to side, her half-lidded eyes slightly panicked. What had been going on? Had she done something bad? Why did her head hurt so much? Something was pinning her arms down, keeping her from moving, and she struggled to get free, not realizing that Anna was just half holding her. "What…why…stuck! I…I want-" Elsa finally managed to get one arm free, and she touched her bandage in confusion. _So I did hurt myself. What happened? Why can't I remember?_

"Miss Elsa, it's all right. Calm down," Gerda said reassuringly. "You hurt your head and Anna was holding you because you were upset," she explained slowly.

"Head…hurts," Elsa agreed. Her blue eyes drifted shut again, and she didn't try to free her other arm anymore. If Anna was there, Anna would take care of her, and so would Gerda. Maybe she had fallen or something and hit her head? _I must have done something wrong,_ she thought absently. _I always do. What was it?_ Elsa suddenly looked up at Gerda again, tears filling her eyes. "Was…w-was I bad?" she asked hesitantly. She thought she remembered something from the night before…had she hurt someone? She couldn't remember.

"No, you were not bad," Gerda told her firmly. "Just try to rest some more, Miss Elsa. Your sister is right next to you, and I'm right here."

The last thing Elsa remembered clearly was Anna telling her she was going to the bookstore with Kristoff for something. Elsa's expression scrunched up in confusion as she tried to organize her jumbled memories from the evening before. _I don't even know if that was yesterday. What if, like, a week passed and I didn't even know?_ She had gone to the yucky dungeon to get some information from Hans because…why? Why would she have done _that_? _Anna said he told her something, right? I can't remember! Why can't I remember? I think I tried to get Anna away from bad people, maybe. What happened?_ "I…I can't r-remember anything," Elsa mumbled.

Gerda took a deep breath, refusing to let herself panic or grow worried for nothing. _She's fine. She has to be._ "Can you tell me my name?" she asked.

Elsa was puzzled by this question; what would Gerda want her to answer that question for? Of course she knew Gerda's name. _Maybe Gerda thinks something's wrong with me 'cause I hurt my head?_ "Gerda. Anna 'side…me." She pointed at herself and added, "Elsa."

 _Good, at least Elsa can answer a simple question easily enough._ "How about the last thing you remember clearly?" Gerda asked.

"An…Anna s..said she was going t' book…place with Kristoff. Yesterday?" Elsa asked hopefully. She really, really wanted just a few hours to be missing and not anything longer than that. And… "Why can't I…t-talk right?"

 _Thank goodness. Elsa's just missing a few hours, more or less. Good._ "Because your head has to heal, Miss Elsa," Gerda said gently. "Give yourself a chance."

"Yesterday?" Elsa asked again.

Gerda quickly nodded, realizing she hadn't answered Elsa's question. "Yes, Anna went to the bookstore with Kristoff yesterday."

"Is Papa here?" Elsa suddenly seemed tense, her tired blue eyes worried.

Gerda frowned. "No. Your father is in Weselton," she said simply, unsure what to say to that. Elsa should know her father wasn't in Arendelle. That was old news for her.

Elsa instantly relaxed and closed her eyes. "Good…Papa not…not want me. Never…never good enough," she whispered. _I did something wrong last night. I know I did. I got mad at Anna? Is that what happened?_ "Was I…bad?" Elsa asked again. "Something…wrong. I…I d-don't understand. No memory…" _And my head hurts so bad. What did I do?_

"You were _not_ bad, Miss Elsa," Gerda repeated firmly. _What do I tell her?_ Gerda wasn't sure what information to give Elsa at the moment. Whatever she said about what had happened the night before was sure to just stress Elsa out, and Gerda wanted Elsa to just rest. "Are you thirsty?" she asked finally.

Elsa nodded and then winced and put her hand to her head again. _What on earth did I do to myself this time? And is…is Anna okay? What if I hurt her? I_ know _I did something wrong, I just can't remember what._ She felt something move beside her and tensed up all over before realizing it was just Anna. Elsa slowly blinked up at her little sister and then grew tense all over again. Anna had bruises on her face. Therefore she must have hurt Anna. What had she done? "An…Anna, I…I'm sorry. Gerda, Anna…Anna's hurt! What…what…I do?"

Anna had first been delighted that Elsa was awake again, but then she frowned. _Elsa…sounds funny. She knows she didn't hurt me. Her dark self knew_ that _. What did she do to herself?_ "Gerda, what's wrong with Elsa?" she asked concernedly. "Why is she talking like that? She knows she didn't hurt me! She _rescued_ me!"

"There is nothing wrong with Miss Elsa," Gerda said firmly in a tone that said there was no room for argument. "She hurt her head and she's having trouble remembering anything from yesterday evening on," she added pointedly. _Anna, don't ask anything else. Please._ "I'll be right back. Miss Anna, make sure your sister doesn't try to sit up or anything by herself. You help her if she wants to do anything."

Anna nodded and bit her lip. She understood that Gerda didn't want to risk getting Elsa all stirred up about something, but she wasn't sure what to say to Elsa, either.

"I…I rescue…rescued you?" Elsa asked hopefully. "Not…not hurt you?" She tried to sit up and immediately felt queasy. "Anna…I feel…s-sick. Help, please?" Anna immediately hopped up and ran to the bathroom. _What is wrong with me? I've gotten knocked out before and I didn't feel like this. And what happened? Anna said I rescued her. Did I get hurt doing that, maybe?_ Trying to think was making her head hurt all the more, and she sighed. _Anna, bring that bucket or whatever over here_ now. _I feel like I'm going to throw up._

"Sorry, Elsa, I couldn't find it right away but I hurried!" Anna ran back and plopped down beside her sister. She couldn't think of anything helpful to say, so she just gently held Elsa's hair back and rubbed her shoulder. "Better now?" Anna asked a minute later.

Elsa nodded, grateful for Anna supporting her even though she felt embarrassed by Anna seeing her like that. She didn't feel sick anymore, but her head was spinning and she thought she might fall if she tried to sit or stand on her own. "I'm sorry," she whispered.

Anna just gave Elsa a reassuring hug. "Don't be sorry. Everyone barfs sometimes. Even my dignified big sister," she teased, trying to make Elsa smile. Elsa didn't; she just sat there and carefully clasped her hands together in her lap. _Elsa, please be ok. Don't cry._ "Do you think you can walk to the bathroom if I help you?" Anna asked. "Then you can rinse your face. Trust me, it makes you feel loads better."

"I'll…I'll try." Elsa did feel a bit better now; her head was still pounding, but she felt more alert and at least she no longer felt sick! "Thank y-you, Anna," she added quietly. _I know I did something bad last night, but at least Anna is okay._

* * *

"Kristoff, I think there's something really wrong with Elsa," Anna insisted a couple hours later. "She can't even _talk_ very well, and she was trying really hard. I could tell. And she, you know, got sick from just trying to sit up. Elsa needs help! I want to take her to see Grand Pabbie. Even if he can't heal her, maybe he can help somehow if he can actually see her." Anna was outside in the courtyard now, and she looked up at Elsa's bedroom window worriedly.

"Elsa hurt her head pretty bad, Anna. You said she just woke up a couple hours ago. Give her a chance. _I_ still have a headache myself and I didn't have magic forced into my head like Elsa did." Kristoff paused to think before continuing. "You know, she might be able to fix her head herself since it was her own magic that did it in the first place."

"But Elsa doesn't have healing powers," Anna pointed out, frowning. _I wish she did. Elsa sent Rapunzel home to Corona, but even if she hadn't, Rapunzel wouldn't be able to help her anyway since it was from magic…_

"No, but she hurt herself with her own magic. She should be able to reverse stuff her own powers do. I mean, Elsa probably can't _completely_ heal herself, but I bet she could at least get rid of the ice magic itself so the rest of her can heal too," Kristoff explained.

Anna grinned, happy that there might be a solution to help her sister, but then she made a face. "Kristoff…what if Elsa manages to get rid of the ice and she's still the same? It takes _ages_ for things like that to heal. I know it does. And Rapunzel won't be able to help her, either…"

"Then you'll have to help her until she's better."

"Elsa did this to herself to keep from hurting me," Anna said softly. "She can't remember any of what happened last night, but she kept asking if she was bad. I think Elsa must have asked me that half a dozen times before I came down here. She's scared."

"Wouldn't you be scared too if your head hurt like the dickens and you couldn't remember stuff? Anna, Elsa will be _fine_. You ought to be with her right now instead of talking to me, you know, and-"

"I…I don't want to sit with Elsa right now," Anna interrupted, her blue-green eyes filled with tears. "I'm scared I'll say something wrong a-and hurt her. It's horrible seeing her like that. Worse than if she hurt her arm or something else. Just…anything but her head. I want t-to make Elsa all better _now_! Why does she keep ending up hurt? It's not fair!"

Kristoff just awkwardly hugged Anna and said nothing for a moment. "Because she does stupid things to keep other people safe, that's why. She needs _you,_ not anyone else. Maybe convince her to let you help her with her queen stuff in general. If it'll make you feel better, I'll take you two over to the troll valley whenever you want. Sound good?"

Anna nodded and gave him a kiss on the cheek before running back inside.

* * *

"Kristoff is correct, Queen Elsa," Grand Pabbie said several hours later. "You can heal yourself, although…" The old troll paused before reaching to touch Elsa's head. "May I?" Pabbie asked, knowing Elsa still didn't feel comfortable around him and that her magic would probably react anyway.

Elsa just gave the troll a thumbs up instead of saying 'yes' or nodding her head. She had already decided she was _not_ trying to talk anymore; it was embarrassing and she hated it. And moving her head made it hurt more. Elsa still flinched when Grand Pabbie touched her, but she didn't react otherwise, and her magic didn't do anything either, although she could feel it stirring about under her skin. _Grand Pabbie isn't actually trying to use his magic on me. I can feel it._ She held Anna's hand tightly, happy that she had Anna supporting her so she wouldn't fall.

"It is easier to sense your magic this way, but I cannot actually do anything for you," Pabbie explained. "It is as I thought. You did to yourself what you did to your sister when you were little, but your magic is stronger now, so, for lack of a better term, it was more violent about it."

"Why isn't she unconscious then?" Anna asked curiously.

"Because it is _her_ magic. I am surprised she was able to force it to injure her at all. Natural mages are usually immune to their own magic, no argument about it. This is why her magic put up a fight in the first place." Pabbie turned his attention back to Elsa and added, "Queen Elsa, you should be able to heal yourself fairly easily. You put ice in your head-you can thaw it. That is like healing it from the inside out. It will not get better at all until you do so, either. Your magic cannot flow through you properly with ice where it is not supposed to be."

Elsa felt a bit confused even though she understood what she was supposed to do.

"Will that heal Elsa's head completely then?" Anna smiled hopefully. "She'll be all better?"

Grand Pabbie sighed. "No, princess. She tore herself up putting it in, and it will do the same to pull it out. The internal injury should be healed completely, however. I stress, _Queen Elsa was not supposed to be able to do that in the first place_."

Elsa ignored the conversation around her, finally understanding what was going to happen. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath before putting her free hand to her head. _Okay, Elsa, you can do this. Just…stay calm. Don't do anything stupid…_ Elsa yelped when she felt the same awful pain she suddenly recalled from the night before, although she still couldn't remember why she had done it in the first place. _Why would I have hurt my own head? That's silly. I don't understand…maybe Anna will tell me…_ She finally just collapsed in Anna's arms, not sure if she had succeeded or not. Something warm wrapped around her…she could feel herself shaking, but she knew she hadn't panicked. What happened? "An…Anna?"

"It's all right, Elsa, you did it," Anna said quickly. Elsa blinked up at her in confusion, and she gave Elsa a reassuring smile. "How do you feel?"

"Weird," Elsa deadpanned. She managed to smile back at Anna and sighed. _I do feel somewhat better though? My head still hurts, but not nearly as bad. And…and I did rescue Anna. Something made me act all weird after that, I think._ Elsa still couldn't remember clear details from the night before, but she did recall the general events now. Bad people had taken Anna and Kristoff; Elsa had gotten them back; and something had made her…not herself after that. "This mossy…thing s-smells nice," she added. _I can talk properly again. Good. Anna and Gerda did not help me with my stutter last year just to for me to hurt my head again._ Elsa thought she _might_ still have a bit of trouble talking sans stutter right this minute, but at least she could get her words out without struggling, anyways.

Elsa winced when she felt Anna gently press a new bandage to her head, but she said nothing about it. It still wasn't anywhere near as bad as it had been just a few minutes ago; it mostly just stung now instead of feeling like a thousand hammers in her whole head. "Thank y-you, Anna," she said quietly.

"You're bleeding again," Anna scolded, although she knew it wasn't Elsa's fault. "Grand Pabbie, how long is that going to take to heal completely?" she asked.

"Much faster than it would if it was caused by ordinary non-magical means," the old troll told her. "A week at most."

"My stutter too?" Elsa asked hopefully.

Pabbie looked at her fondly and patted her shoulder. "That is just your muddled memories from last night settling where they should. It should be gone very shortly. Do not worry if you still cannot remember all the details, however," he told her.

"Elsa, even if it didn't disappear, don't worry about it," Kristoff put in. "It doesn't matter, really. You hate giving speeches anyway and you could let Anna do that sort of thing if you didn't want to do it, you know."

Elsa giggled at that. She did hate giving speeches anyway. And Anna _could_ help. "Come on, let's go home. Thank y-you, Grand Pabbie."

"Queen Elsa, wait. There is another thing. You must rest a bit, but after you have, you will have an important issue to resolve," Grand Pabbie said.

"Could you…please d-dispense with the cryptic lines?" Elsa asked with a sigh. _Just tell me straight out. That is so frustrating…_

"I sense you will have a large decision to make to protect Arendelle's borders, much like your ancestor Ingrid did. Your dark side has done something you would not ordinarily do, Elsa. You must control it." The old troll looked straight at Elsa as he went on, "Fear is your enemy, as you already know. This time it is not merely what you assume."

Elsa's already pale face turned white. "You mean…it _is_ others' f-fear this…time?" she asked hesitantly. "Instead of m-my own?"

"No, Queen Elsa. It is both."

 **A/N: *cue dramatic music*:P**

 **Next chapter coming soon!:)**

 **P.S. I know I owe several people a PM, email, review, or all three. You guys all know who you are. I promise I'll get back to you as soon as I can:)**


	37. Chapter 37

**A/N: Thanks to everyone who's followed/favorited and/or is reading but not reviewing:)**

 **Ladyleo145-Thank YOU for the compliments:) I'm happy you like my writing:)**

 **Olivia O'Neil-Thank you:) Yes and no...it has more to do with her mental/emotional state than literal power.**

 **FluffyKitten-Kolfinnia's fine:) And Elsa can always spoil her rotten, too. Lol, angry Elsa is, let's just say, NOT GOOD for anyone, herself included. I think because she does not get angry very often in the first place, when she does get mad...she's _really_ mad. Okay, Meri is sort of Merida but not...she still has her three little brothers and the like but her backstory isn't exactly the same. More on her later.:) Elsa is somewhat close to being an ice master, but she has to actually work on that. She isn't just going to "happen" to become one without trying.**

 **IndyGirl89-Well, Elsa's magic won't do that ordinarily...she forced it to do so.:)**

 **Elsa Tomago-I left the note ambiguous so you can interpret what it said however you want. But in my mind they were threatening to hurt Anna. You're right, Dark Elsa isn't evil, she's just...angry. And more on what Elsa's magic did soon:) Also right...it wasn't Elsa's or Anna's fault at all.:/ Elsa is capable of extreme emotions-while that does make her hypersensitive, which weakens her in some situations, she's also able to make herself do things that are helpful, too:)**

 **raven678-Elsa will be okay-just give her a few chapters here.:) She;s still not entirely herself yet. That's very true-she's going to realize things aren't quite right...**

 **On to the story!**

Elsa was quiet on the way home. She tried her best to remember everything from the night before, but try as she might, it didn't seem to help much. At least not beyond decreasing the remaining pain in her head. Part of her was worried that she could not remember simply because some subconscious part of her didn't want to. What if she had done something horrible? Pabbie had said her dark side had done something she wouldn't do ordinarily. _Anna is clearly fine, but…what if I hurt someone else? Or worse, killed someone, like one of the bad people?_

Elsa shuddered when she felt a faint "reply" in her thoughts. _So what are you going to do if you did? If they kidnapped Anna, they deserved what they got. Maybe capital punishment isn't all bad. Did you forget you have absolute power anyways? You can do whatever you like and no one can do a thing about it. Nice thought, isn't it,_ the voice deadpanned. _Felt good too, didn't it? I am you too, you know. Not just that little pathetic frightened girl you think you are._

"Elsa, don't worry about whatever it is you're trying to think about. You need to just rest," Anna said quietly. She'd felt Elsa tense up beside her and easily known at least sort of what was bothering her. _What if there's still a bit of that serum in her?_ Anna thought worriedly. She still wasn't the least bit scared that Elsa might hurt her, despite what had happened the night before, but she _was_ worried for Elsa, in more ways than one. Anna frowned as she put her arm around Elsa, who immediately put her head on Anna's shoulder and closed her eyes. "Does your head still hurt?" Anna asked.

Elsa didn't reply for a minute and eventually just said, "A little." That was true; mostly she was just frightened and wanted Anna's warm hug. She kept her hands held close pointed towards herself, unwilling to risk hurting anyone, at least not that way. _I thought about hurting Anna,_ she thought miserably all of a sudden. _Obviously I didn't, but I thought it. How could I have done that?_

 _Maybe she said something that set you off,_ the 'other' Elsa said.

 _Anna wouldn't do that!_

 _Not on purpose, of course, but she says things without thinking, you know. That would mean it wasn't your fault at all AND not really hers, either. Just more her fault than yours._ "An…Anna, did you s-say something that set me off? L…last night?" Elsa asked in a flat voice. That would prove whether the 'other' Elsa was right or not, wouldn't it? _What am I even thinking? Even if Anna did say something that set me off, that's no excuse. I thought about_ hurting her. _That makes me a bad person._

Anna hesitated. If she said yes, she had a sick feeling that would somehow be validating whatever bits of Dark Elsa that were still there. If she said no, that was a flat-out lie. _I can't lie to her. I just can't. It's just…if Elsa can't remember anyway, maybe not telling her wouldn't hurt her. Might even help._ "No," she muttered finally, not meeting Elsa's eyes.

 _Anna, what the…?_ Kristoff frowned; he clearly remembered exactly what had happened, and in his mind, Anna had _definitely_ set Elsa off, albeit innocently. Lying to Elsa-or being misleading to her-could only cause trouble. Elsa would find out simply because she was good at reading people. "What Anna didn't say is that you misinterpreted something she said as something you two's dumb father told you," Kristoff said from the front of the sled-wagon. "It was neither yours nor Anna's fault, Elsa." He stopped Sven and turned around to face the girls. "Elsa, you did think about hurting Anna, which is obviously wrong, but you decided not to on your own without any prodding from anyone. You used the magic on yourself instead. That's how your head got hurt. I don't know what you remember or what you think you remember from yesterday, but dark-you did nothing outright evil. _Nothing_."

"Did…did I kill the bad people?" Elsa asked, her blue eyes bright with tears.

Kristoff looked her right in the eyes as he answered her. "I don't know, Elsa, but if you did, that is still not evil. They would have killed Anna and me eventually to make you react. You rescued us. You _were_ more violent with your rescue methods than you probably would have been otherwise, but you were doing a good thing. They were poking a sleeping bear, and you know it." He paused before adding, "You know, you could use this whole mess to grow stronger inside rather than letting Dark Elsa do something bad and then freaking out and picking on yourself because of it. You still aren't Normal Elsa yet, and I think you know that already. You already know you _can_ control Dark Elsa, so maybe you can throw out the bad parts of both Dark Elsa and Normal Elsa and use the good parts of both." _Come on, Elsa, please understand. I know you can._

To Kristoff's great relief, Elsa actually smiled…and it was a genuine, confident smile rather than Dark Elsa's smirk or Normal Elsa's hesitant, shy smile she usually made. _I can do that. I may not be able to do so on my own, but I have people with me that care about me and are willing to help. So there._ She quickly fell asleep for the rest of the trip back.

* * *

"Anna, you wanted to help Elsa…I think I have a few ideas that ought to help her," Kristoff said quietly once they had arrived back to the castle stables. He glanced at Elsa to be sure she was still sleeping before continuing.

"Ok, what are they?" Anna asked curiously.

"Well, first of all, make her rest for at least the rest of today. You're the only one she might listen to on that. Number two, I've been thinking what issue or issues Grand Pabbie meant when he said Elsa had some big decision to make, and I'll bet her magic did something outside Arendelle that we don't know about. Remember right after I brought the gloves back? Elsa said her magic had done something, but she didn't know what and she hadn't made a mess in her room, either." Kristoff paused, trying to figure out how to explain his logic for what he wanted to say next. _Oh, I'll just say it. Can't hurt._ "Anna, Dark Elsa isn't gone. Even after the serum is a hundred percent out of Elsa's system, her dark side will still be a part of her, because it's part of who she is. Just like you or I have a dark side too. I think in Elsa's case she's so frightened of being even remotely near her dark side that it's holding her back somehow. Does that make sense?"

Anna scowled. _That's not Elsa at all. She hasn't got a dark side, she's too sweet for that._ "No. Kristoff, Elsa's just…Elsa. I don't think she's really got a dark side. That's silly. She isn't like that." She looked down at the sleeping girl in her arms and made a face. "Look at her. Does that really look like someone with a 'dark side'?"

Kristoff tried his best not to roll his eyes. "Um, well, yeah. She's human, she has a dark side," he said flatly. "We saw said dark side yesterday. Anna, she came very close to hurting you, whether you want to believe it or not. That's Elsa's dark side if anything is. Everyone has some kind of dark desires that any decent person won't act on. Example…for you, I'll bet one of _yours_ would be to get back at your parents for what they did to Elsa. For Elsa, one of those darkest desires is to be ridiculously powerful so no one can say she isn't good enough. Normal Elsa most likely doesn't even know that is something she sort of wants…or if she does, she's frightened of what getting that entails. That fear is what keeps her from acting on it."

"Isn't that a good thing? I don't want Elsa turning into some crazy power-hungry tyrant!"

"Well, sure, but only in a healthy amount," Kristoff replied as he put Sven in a stall and gave him a carrot. He hesitated, unsure how Anna would react to what he had to say next. "Anna, I've seen the way your sister acts sometimes. It isn't that she's scared of her magic in of itself…it's that she's _terrified_ of just what she's capable of. Just how strong she could be. She's constantly holding herself back, unless she's defending someone else perhaps, and I bet she isn't even consciously choosing to do so. The _only_ time she truly let her magic go for herself was when she made her ice palace, and that was before she ever practiced using said magic. Can you imagine what she could do now, nearly a year later, if she practiced? Elsa is almost twenty-two years old. She could probably be an ice master already if she was really trying to be."

Anna sighed. _I remember Elsa saying something sort of like that recently, actually. Something that being different wasn't the problem-it was just how strong her magic was._ "So…what's your point?" _And I bet Elsa not being an ice master yet has to do with her trying to make up for thirteen years of suppressing her magic…_

"My point is that if all of us help Elsa-but mostly just you-maybe Elsa can use her dark side to banish the unhealthy part of that fear away," Kristoff said carefully. "Nobody should be frightened of their own abilities. Even if they have goddess-level powers."

"But…" Anna wasn't sure what to say. Part of her didn't want Elsa to be _that_ powerful. When she looked at Elsa, she couldn't see anything but her sweet big sister that needed protecting and lots of TLC. She didn't see the Snow Queen with the goddess-level ice powers. Just Elsa and her magic. "Thinking of Elsa like that just makes her seem even more different than she does already," she said finally. "She's still just a human girl, same as me. You make it sound like she's so different that she's not even a regular girl."

"Elsa _is_ different, and she should embrace that. It's part of who she is," Kristoff said matter-of-factly.

"Wouldn't embracing godlike powers make her snobby and power-hungry?"

"Nope, because Elsa's morals won't let her. Because of her background and her natural personality, she can use a crazy level of power like that for good. Seeing what even Dark Elsa wanted only proves that. Those parts of Elsa that she-and everyone else-would call damaged or broken, the parts of her that make her so hypersensitive and whatnot allow for that. And I think you know that and so does Elsa," Kristoff explained. "Look, neither you nor anybody else is going to get any sympathy from me trying to make Elsa even remotely 'normal', because she just plain isn't. My family is the trolls, remember. 'Normal' is boring. Let's bring magic back to the world instead of making it a feared secret. Your sister can do that." Pause. "You heal Elsa's mental and emotional state, because I am no good with such things, and if you'll let me, I'll try to help her heal the way she thinks of her magic and get her to embrace it more."

Anna smiled a bit as she hugged Elsa closer. She nodded. "Deal." _Look out, Elsa, you're going to get loads of help whether you want it or not. You're going to be fine._

"Anna, one more thing. You lied to her on the way back here, and I think we all know how much Elsa values trust in the people closest to her. You'd best hope she doesn't remember or realize what you said," Kristoff said quietly. "Otherwise we're all in trouble."

"I just didn't want to validate Dark Elsa's thought process, that's all," Anna protested.

"Yeah, but real-Elsa will be either mad or really, really upset if she thinks you lied to her."

* * *

Elsa didn't wake up until hours later, and then she immediately tried to get up, only for Anna to push her back against the pillows. "Anna, let me up," she protested. "I want to m-make sure Kolfinnia is okay now."

Anna grinned. "Already knew you would ask that, so I brought her in here." She plopped the little cat down right on Elsa's tummy, and the older girl instantly smiled and began petting the cat gently. "Seriously, Elsa, you are staying in bed 'til tomorrow if I have to sit on you to make you stay there. You _have_ to rest. Tomorrow we can start figuring out what to do next."

"I could always drop s-snow down your back," Elsa teased. "Come on, Anna, at least l-let me sit up, please." Anna relented, but she fluffed Elsa's pillows and wouldn't let her sit up on her own, either. Elsa frowned as she looked at Kolfinnia's big green eyes. The little cat wasn't acting any different than she usually did, but Elsa caught something different in her eyes; Kolfinnia looked slightly scared to her. Elsa just hugged her pet close. She didn't want Kolfinnia to feel like that. So there. _I'm going to spoil you rotten, Kolfinnia,_ Elsa thought to herself. _And I will find out who hurt you. They will not be doing that again. I won't let them._ Rapunzel had healed Kolfinnia's leg, but like Elsa herself, Rapunzel hadn't been able to heal her inside. At least Kolfinnia seemed mostly okay. _A kitty wouldn't end up with panic attacks like me anyways. And I think Kolfinnia is all right mostly…she just needs to be spoiled for a little while._

"Elsa, if you spoil that cat she's going to start scratching things up and making messes," Anna warned, but she knew Elsa wasn't listening. "She might pee on your bed," Anna went on, figuring that would get Elsa's attention.

Elsa just giggled at that and held Kolfinnia closer, and the cat yowled in protest at being squished. Kolfinnia batted Elsa's hand in warning and wiggled out of her arms and curled up beside her instead. Elsa glanced at the pile of black-and-white fur beside her and just smiled at Anna. "Kolfinnia won't do that. She has a litter box d-downstairs and Gerda lets her out to do her business, too," she pointed out.

Anna rolled her eyes; she knew Elsa loved animals just as much as she did, if not more, and if spoiling Kolfinnia made Elsa happy, Anna was not going to stop her. "So, Kai came and told me all of those bad people you tossed over the castle wall are in the dungeon," Anna said carefully. "I thought maybe I could help you figure out what you're going to say to them tomorrow. That way you can still stay in bed and rest, and get something important done too." She decided to leave out that Kai had told her that some of them were injured, although Elsa hadn't actually killed any of them.

"Are any of them…d-dead?" Elsa asked hesitantly. _I threw them over the castle wall? Wait…yes, I did. I choked the leader on purpose. I yelled at them for hurting Anna, too._ She still couldn't remember the exact details very well, but she did remember a sick feeling of raw power coursing through her. She hadn't even had to try very hard to neutralize the threat to her precious baby sister. _I can keep Anna safe all by myself,_ Elsa thought, pleased.

She crossed her arms and looked at Anna. "I hope they aren't dead, but I'm glad I protected you. My m-magic was happy. The power f-felt good," Elsa said flatly. _What am I saying? I don't want to be like that. I could have just frozen them in place…not choked one and thrown them all over the wall. But…_ Elsa's blue eyes welled with tears. "It…it felt…good to not be…helpless like…like in that cave. Or…or ignored. They can't ignore me if I use my magic t-to fight back. I…I want t-to be strong like you. Please don't hate me." _Elsa, you sound pathetic. If you want to be strong, this is not how to do it. You're nothing but a defective pile of raw nerves. You should let_ me _take over. I'm you too, you know._

 _That is NOT me! Stop it!_

 _What for? You liked being powerful. It felt good, didn't it? And,_ Elsa's inner voice seemed to abruptly change its tune, _and you hurt people. You_ were _bad. Gerda said you weren't, but you were. You should be punished for that._

Elsa's body had grown deathly cold all over, and Kolfinnia moved down to the end of the bed, not particularly perturbed since she knew "her" human got like that sometimes. Anna just grabbed a blanket from Elsa's closet, wrapped it around Elsa, and then just held her close. "It's all right, Elsa. I do _not_ hate you," Anna said firmly. She hugged the older girl tightly, trying to keep her from shaking. Elsa didn't seem to be panicking, but she was shaking all over all the same. _I knew that serum wasn't all gone. Elsa's fighting with herself again,_ Anna thought. "Elsa, who is 'they'?" she asked curiously.

Elsa didn't answer; she didn't know how to explain herself. She could feel her magic stirring inside, wanting her to let it out. She closed her eyes and forced it to stay in where she felt it belonged. _Magic, you_ will _listen to me. I will not risk hurting Anna just because I am angry and hurt. So there._

"What's wrong exactly?" Anna asked now. _Elsa's all tense. She does that when she's…not happy. I got to know what's wrong so I can help her._

"My magic wants out," Elsa said truthfully. She couldn't help being surprised when Anna gently pushed her away and just took her hands…her dangerous, trouble-causing hands…instead. _Anna still isn't scared of me? Even though I thought about hurting her yesterday?_

Anna just gave her sister a reassuring smile. "So let it out, Elsa," she suggested quietly, remembering what Kristoff had said earlier. "You can control it. You're doing that right this second by making it stay in. You can let it out, too. Control means _practice_ anyways, remember? And don't look so surprised, you stinker. I told you I wasn't scared of you, and I meant it."

Elsa's face scrunched up worriedly. "It might do s-something bad," she mumbled.

Anna frowned. "Maybe, but I don't think so," she told Elsa, trying to be truthful. "How much magic 'wants out'? Maybe you've gotta consciously choose to do something of equal energy level to make it quiet down."

Elsa looked away, her cheeks red. She could feel frost crawling up her arms, and she tried to pull her hands away from Anna, but Anna held on stubbornly and refused to let go. "My powers _like_ dark-me, b-because she's willing to throw them around willy-nilly," she said softly, hoping Anna would understand. _Does that make me a bad person?_ Elsa wondered.

"Which is why I told you to consciously choose to do something of equal energy level," Anna replied matter-of-factly. "Look, Elsa, you are so-called 'losing control' right this second and you are not hurting me. You're making my hands feel really cold, sure, but you aren't freezing or hurting me." Anna held up their clasped hands and gave Elsa another reassuring smile.

"Power is work divided by time…work is force times displacement…force is mass times acceleration…" Elsa muttered to herself. She looked down at her hands and then at Anna, her blue eyes twinkling. "I think I have an idea."

* * *

"What the heck, Elsa?! That is _crazy_!" Anna protested a few minutes later. "How on earth could you have that much power inside you?! You must've calculated something wrong."

Elsa shook her head. "No, I didn't. That's how much water is in the fjord and all of these calculations are right. It's 5,800,000,000,000,000 joules. And I checked my formulas in this physics book from the library. Now, obviously I can't do that all the time since that was my magic all pent-up for so long, but I bet we can do some experiments ourselves. Watch." Elsa waited until the clock's second hand was exactly on the twelve and then stamped her foot. Instantly her room's floor was covered with ice. "Okay, it's about, oh, two seconds so for my magic's energy output to do that _completely_ and then stop, but it's still near instantaneous. I can sense rough estimates for some of our formulas, too…This is so cool!" Somewhere deep inside, Elsa could still feel both Dark Elsa and the scared bits of her complaining about what she was doing, but this felt… _right_. Dark Elsa was mad at her for not using her magic on those bad people downstairs in the dungeon, and the scared bits of her were just terrified of being far more powerful than anything she had ever heard of before. But this felt right. She could let her magic out without harming anyone or anything. _I feel so much better now._

"There's just one problem," Elsa added a moment later, frowning. "There is no s-scientific explanation or formula for dissolving my own ice."

Anna giggled at that. "Elsa, you haven't got to make everything scientific. You do have magic, after all. You aren't a machine. Maybe you kind of absorb it or something? Change its state?"

"No, I'd know if I did that. The things I m-make literally dissolve into nothing when I make them go a-away." Elsa scowled. "That disobeys everything. You can't create or destroy matter."

"Maybe you can," Anna said, pointing at a page in Elsa's book. "What's this antimatter thing?"

"Papa said antimatter didn't exist."

Anna huffed angrily. "Elsa, he's been wrong about loads of other things; he's probably wrong about this too. He lied to both of us, and…never mind. Anyways. Everything else in this book appears to be right…right?" She frowned as she looked at Elsa, who was now just looking down at the floor, her hands clasped behind her back. "Elsa, please don't be-"

" _You_ lied to me," Elsa interrupted suddenly, her voice soft. _Anna said 'no' on the way home when I asked if she'd said something that set me off, and Kristoff explained what had really happened. I know she did. Why would Anna do that?_ She slowly lifted her head, tears running down her pale cheeks. "Anna…why? Why did you do that?"

Anna hesitated, unsure what to say. This was exactly what Kristoff had been worried would happen. Elsa was crying, but Anna could see a hint of anger in Elsa's big blue eyes. She was hurt, and didn't understand. Anna decided to just tell Elsa the truth, come what may. "I just didn't want to validate dark-you's thought process," Anna told her. "I _did_ set you off, and, well…I thought Dark Elsa probably blamed me, and I'm not afraid of you, but I was afraid dark-you might do something, and…Elsa, I don't know what to say. I'm sorry." She reached for Elsa's shoulder, but the older girl flinched away and backed up.

Elsa felt a wave of anger wash over her-how dare Anna take _all_ of the blame away from herself?! that wasn't fair, either-but just as quickly the anger was gone, only leaving a broken, sad Elsa behind. Only two thoughts crashed through her head. _Anna just said she was afraid of me…dark-me, but me all the same. I trusted Anna implicitly, and she lied to me._ She turned away stiffly, suddenly not wanting Anna to see her tears. Anna had full reason to be scared of her, didn't she? It was just…Elsa found it so, so hard to trust anyone, and now Anna had lied to her. She did understand _why_ Anna had done it, but she still felt betrayed somehow. _That's stupid, Elsa. You were going to hurt her with your powers. Of course she was afraid what you might do if you thought it was her fault._ Elsa felt ice crackling under her feet, but she didn't bother to try to hold it back. What was the point? _Of course there's a point, Elsa. You love Anna and your country. You don't want to hurt them._

 _That's not angry ice. It's purple,_ Elsa thought miserably.

 _Sad ice can still hurt people, you idiot. Anna probably doesn't love you anymore,_ "said" Dark Elsa in a pained sort of way. _So there is no point in trying to be strong or, heaven forbid,_ normal. _Maybe you should obliterate all of the bad people and then yourself too. Anna can be queen and all of the bad people will be gone, so everything would be just fine. Use your powers, Elsa._ Elsa looked down at her hands and then just stared out the window, her back ramrod straight. "D'you still love me?" she asked quietly. "Even though I…I almost h-hurt you?"

Anna had been just standing there awkwardly, not having any idea what to say. Now she felt herself beginning to cry. _This is what I get for not thinking enough before I say stuff. I hurt her. I hurt Elsa. Again._ Sensing that Elsa was probably too cold to touch at the moment even though she didn't appear to be panicking, Anna yanked the comforter off Elsa's bed and draped it around Elsa's tense shoulders before hugging her close. "Does this answer your question?"

Elsa only let out an involuntary whimper in response, but Anna's impulsive hug somehow did help the warring feelings roiling inside her. Maybe Anna had lied to her because she was worried about her, not because she was scared of her. That made more sense, really. She felt a warm hand gently stroking her hair, and she finally broke down entirely. Anna wouldn't touch her with her bare hand if she was scared of her. Of course Anna loved her, "damaged goods" and all. Anna had _always_ loved her. She didn't need anything else from Anna.

Anna yelped in surprise when Elsa's legs collapsed under her, but she managed not to drop the older girl. At least Elsa was relaxed again. _Elsa's crying, but she seems…relieved somehow. She isn't all scared and upset anymore._ Anna thought about the way Elsa had asked her question. She was almost positive that Elsa had been making a decision of some kind based on whatever her response was. _I don't even want to think about what Elsa would have done if I had said no-which of course I wouldn't do, but poor Elsa couldn't realize that on her own for some reason._ "Elsa, what were you thinking about when you asked me that ridiculous question?" she asked curiously.

Elsa tensed up again, but she answered quickly. "That if you said no, I would l-let Dark Elsa take over and go obliterate all of the bad p-people. Then get rid of me, too, so Arendelle w-wouldn't be a target. You c-could be queen instead."

"Elsa!" Anna shouted instinctively, which made Elsa wince and put her hands over her ears. "Oh, I'm sorry, Elsa, I know your head probably still hurts a bit, but good grief, what were you _thinking_?!" she exclaimed, not quite so loud now. "Are you sure your _dark side_ wanted you to do that?" Anna asked hesitantly. "Your dark side wanted you to commit…suicide?"

One look at Elsa's face told Anna all that she needed to know. "I've said before that I'm n-nothing without you. Well, it…it's true. Even Dark Elsa knows it," she whispered. "And Dark Elsa didn't mind me breaking my p-promise not to do…that…"

Anna scowled but said nothing. _Why would Elsa's dark side, that wants to be powerful, want her to do something like that?_

"I can't…that is, if you…I can't lose you, Anna. When I thought you might be s-scared of me, that you lied to me, I…I just…I _can't_. I can't. I'm so, so tired of trying a-and failing to be the big sister and queen I'm supposed to be. I keep messing up and getting us into trouble." _You're never going to be 'all better' like Anna wants you to be. You can still be powerful and no one can hurt you, though,_ Elsa felt her dark-self say. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath before continuing in a flat voice, "Anna, I…I'm never going to be 'all better' like you want me to be. We both know that. It's going to have t-to be okay whether I or you or anyone else like it or n-not." There. She had said it. Somehow Elsa felt like a giant weight had been taken off her shoulders by outright admitting that. _I actually feel okay about it, too._

Anna just found one of her sister's hands and gave her a comforting squeeze. "Sounds like Dark Elsa just said something helpful," she replied happily. Deep inside, Anna knew Elsa was right…her sweet big sister would never be completely 'all better' no matter what anyone did. As long as Elsa could genuinely live a happy life, that would be enough in Anna's mind, and Anna knew that was definitely possible. They just needed to have some peace and quiet politically! Elsa was already much, much better than she had been, and her control over her magic proved that.

"There's another thing, Anna," Elsa said now, completely serious. "I think Arendelle might be less of a t-target without me as reigning monarch," she said softly. "I'm considering abdicating the throne in f-favor of Papa, since…since you've told me lots of times y-you didn't want to be queen. I don't want t-to, but…" Elsa's voice trailed off.

Anna was horrified. "Elsa, you _can't_! I'd be scared you might…die or something. What if Dad took you away from me again? Or…or, I don't know, something else horrible. You do a good job yourself, Elsa. You don't need to do that."

Elsa held Anna's gaze, her blue eyes hard. "No one would respect m-me as queen if I didn't have ice powers, and y-you know it as well as I do. They may like me, but that's it. I'm too young, I'm a single girl, and I…people know I have _issues_ , if you understand what I mean by that." She turned away and just looked out the window towards the North Mountain. "Elsa just wanted to be accepted, and she thought she had that," Elsa murmured wistfully, talking about herself in third person. "She's supposed t-to be okay with some people disliking her…supposed to be normal for a r-reigning monarch…"

Anna frowned. "What are you talking about?" she asked, not understanding what Elsa was talking about. It was obvious she wasn't really talking to Anna.

"I'm too weak and too strong at the s-same time," Elsa said, not completely to Anna. _What is wrong with me? It's like…like dark-me is still there, but she's weakening. It feels like she's fading back into…into I-don't-know-what._ She was right; as the serum was weakening its hold on her, Dark Elsa was retreating back into the recesses of Elsa's mind where she usually kept such things. And without her dark side being in control, Elsa was left feeling…fragile. Even her usual magic flow felt different and subdued to her. With Dark Elsa, her magic genuinely felt at home and a hundred percent happy with her. It felt stronger and more alive, and it made Elsa herself feel stronger, both inside and out. She hated feeling weak and broken, and after being able to _not_ feel that way, she missed it. _Am I a horrible person for thinking that way?_

Elsa felt a gentle squeeze on her arm, and she turned back to face Anna's questioning look. "Elsa, I don't have any idea what exactly you're thinking about, but you can't abdicate," Anna said firmly. "You'll only be hurt yet again, and I don't want that to happen to you. Right now you have the authority to keep people like Dad from hurting you, and giving that up puts you in danger."

"That is precisely one of the reasons why I should. I have too much power as it is, and let me tell you, being able t-to exercise power like that? It feels _good_ , Anna," Elsa said quietly. "Absolute power? Sickly satisfying. Especially to…to someone like m-me that's felt…weak a-and scared and powerless m-most of her life." _What must Anna think of me? Why did I say that?_ She looked down at the floor and clasped her hands behind her back, much as she had done so many times in front of her father in front of this very window during all those years she had been stuck in here.

Anna scowled. _So Elsa liked the feeling of power and yet now says she wants to purposely give it up so everyone else is safe? That just proves she's a good person, not some bad power-hungry creep._ "I think that the fact that you're willing to give it up means you can handle using it fairly, sis," Anna said carefully. "Also, it's only human to feel that way. And, giving up your position of authority in Arendelle won't get rid of your powers anyways. You'd still be powerful whether you liked it or not. If you're worried about the reper-repcus-"

"Repercussions," Elsa muttered.

"Yeah, that. If you're worried about the repercussions of you having magic in general, not being queen wouldn't make any difference because everyone knows you're still inherently powerful anyway." Anna paused; Elsa looked a bit happier now, but she still seemed tense. "Now that I've said all that, if you feel like you just need a temporary break, I think that could be good. It seems like you work your butt off all the time unless you're injured, and then you _still_ try to do that." Anna grinned, a new idea suddenly popping into her head. "I'm selfish and want to have loads of free time with you, so I wouldn't want to take over for you if you decided to do that. Maybe you could have Kai take care of things for a week or so."

"I could invite Papa here t-to help Kai, too," Elsa said happily. "Maybe he would like that."

Anna huffed in frustration. "What on earth, Elsa! WHY?! I don't like you being near Dad 'cause he always makes you upset. Now you want to invite him here to take over your position temporarily?!"

Elsa nodded and gave Anna a lopsided smile. "I bet Papa misses being king. I want to m-make him happy," she replied. _I'm going to write up something that gives Papa my authority for a set amount of time. I can deal with whatever he might want to do with me for a week or so. It won't matter. Maybe if Papa gets to do that, he'll like me better._

Anna sighed and just hugged Elsa tightly. "All right. Whatever you decide, I'll support you. I promise."

* * *

LATE THAT NIGHT…

"Not funny, Elsa," Anna mumbled sleepily as something picked her up right out of bed. "Go t' sleep, 'kay?" Then, in a flash, she realized that the someone was _not_ Elsa. The someone didn't even sound like a girl. Instantly Anna jerked awake, remembering that there were bad people after both her and Elsa. She screamed, and the person dropped her in surprise.

"You be quiet!" another voice ordered. "We don't want your stupid sister coming in here. Not yet!"

Anna impulsively rushed at the second person and punched him as hard as she could, and he hit his head against the wardrobe and slid to the floor, unconscious. "Elsa is not stupid!" she shouted. _C'mon, Elsa, I need your help. Now. Please wake up,_ Anna thought desperately. She knew how to defend herself, but not against multiple people, and she hesitated.

 _Mistake, mistake,_ Anna scolded herself in her head a second later as she was tossed onto the floor. She managed to pull a chair down with her, hoping the noise would attract help from someone in the castle, hopefully Elsa. Anna yelped in fear when she felt cold metal against her forehead. "Elsa will kill you," she managed to say. _Kristoff told me don't get pinned on the floor, and that's just what I did,_ Anna thought miserably.

Just then, Anna heard the door opening, and there was Elsa standing in the doorway. "Get away from Princess Anna, you despicable creep," Elsa ordered in her most menacing voice. She quickly took in the situation: four intruders were in the room; one lay unconscious by Anna's wardrobe, but the other three needed to be neutralized. Instantly the one furthest from Anna was encased in ice up to his neck. _Two down, two to go._ Elsa was unsure what to do to get Anna away from the other two, and now she had a gun trained on her, too. _Your magic is hundreds of times stronger than their guns,_ her inner voice reminded her. "Why are you here?" Elsa asked in English, stalling for time. _He didn't understand what I said at first 'Get away from Princess Anna'._

"You already know, considering you switched languages," the one pointing the gun at her replied.

"Your magic cannot react faster than my bullet will be in your sister's head," the other said. "You will come with us, and we will leave your sister alone. We don't need her, just you."

Elsa took a wary step forward, keeping her eyes on the weapons. She did not put her hands up in her usual defensive position. "What proof do I have that you will really leave the princess and my country alone if I cooperate?" she asked. _Keep them talking, Elsa. Just keep them talking._ Elsa had remembered how she had teased Anna and Kiara back at Christmas by dumping snow on them by merely flicking her finger almost imperceptibly. Now she could do the same and freeze these men's guns from the inside. Maybe. She would only have one chance to do so. "Perhaps we can negotiate…I daresay Anna could take over for me if I came with you. After all, I'm just one girl. Are you sure you want me? I mean, I'm not useful to you if I'm out of control or angry, right?" _Chatter and ramble on like Anna. Distract them. You can do it, Elsa._ "You could just-"

"Shut _up_!" one exclaimed, clearly frustrated.

All at once, Elsa felt a crushing pressure on one hand, realizing too late that the man Anna had knocked out was no longer lying on the floor. _Now, Elsa. Use your magic_ now _!_ her mind screamed. Elsa closed her eyes and concentrated hard, focusing only on the two things she wanted to freeze. A second later she yelped in pain and fell to the floor herself, but she did not panic. Adrenaline coursed through her, and all that registered for her was that she saw Anna safe. A flick of her free hand and the two gun-wielding intruders were frozen in place as well. _Anna's safe, Anna's safe,_ Elsa thought happily.

Anna grabbed one of the neutralized intruders' guns and pointed it at Elsa's captor before Elsa could do anything else herself. "You let my sister go!" she demanded.

The man was so surprised that it gave Elsa a chance to twist herself free, which sent pain coursing up her arm, but she managed to ignore it well enough to freeze him in place too. She sighed in relief and collapsed into Anna's arms gratefully. They were safe. "You know that gun was useless when you picked it up," Elsa said, half smiling. "I froze the inside of it."

Anna just shrugged. "I dunno what I thought. I just wanted to help, that's all. That ol' creep was hurting you!" She stuck out her tongue at the one that had grabbed Elsa and gave the other three her very best stink-eye. They said nothing in response, to both girls' surprise.

Elsa looked the intruders right in the face and stood up straight. "You are all lucky you aren't dead," she said flatly. Inside she could feel that she was completely back to normal, but she decided she would let just a bit of her dark-self out. Just a tiny bit. It wouldn't hurt these men to be intimidated some, and somehow the pain in her hand strengthened her a bit rather than making her want to back down. They had hurt her, and who knew what they might have done to Anna if she hadn't come in right then. _That man probably wanted to do…things to her,_ Elsa's inner voice told her. All of a sudden Elsa was more than mad…she was very, very _angry._ "Anna, you will stay here, please," she ordered in her 'queen' voice. Then she used her good hand to push all four intruders together and stick them together with ice.

"Elsa…what are you doing?" Anna asked, worried that Dark Elsa was in control again. "We're ok, sis, remember?"

"I know what I am doing," Elsa said in a softer tone, reassuring Anna that she was fine, that she wouldn't do anything bad.

Elsa walked right out of Anna's room using her magic to "levitate" the intruders in front of her as she headed downstairs.

* * *

In the dungeon a few minutes later, Elsa dropped her prisoners in one cell and then re-'levitated' the one that had had Anna on the floor and put him in another cell. She did not bother with the other three at all beyond making sure they were locked in. "What were you and your horrid little friends intending to do with my sister had I not come in when I did?" Elsa asked, her voice quiet but clearly holding a threat.

The man didn't answer, but held Elsa's gaze stubbornly. Elsa instantly flipped him upside down with her magic, her hand shaking in anger. "Answer me!" she demanded. _You can do whatever you want as long as you don't actually harm him, Elsa,_ her conscience reminded her. _So don't…drop him on his despicable empty head or something. Don't._ She flipped him back right-side-up before dropping him. The man stepped toward her threateningly, but Elsa held her ground and stepped closer herself, refusing to be cowed. She let her snowflake form in her good hand and simply held it out, her blue eyes flashing. _I am not helpless, and I will fight back now. You went after Anna._

"You're a glass cannon," the man said.

"A fragile cannon is still a cannon and can therefore be used to defend," Elsa replied without missing a beat. She _was_ a 'glass cannon', after all, and that was not an insult to her. "I believe you owe me an answer to my question."

"Just having a bit of fun," he said finally, as if Elsa was the one overreacting or something.

Elsa decided she did not like the way this man was eyeing her, either. "That is not fun. That is sick," she said firmly, and smirked as she dropped the temperature in the cell to around forty degrees. "Let's see how you like _that_ 'bit of fun'. You owe Princess Anna an apology." Elsa stepped out of the cell feeling satisfied. She would just let him shiver until he begged to be allowed to apologize to Anna, so there. _I will not put up with anyone treating Anna that way. Ever._ Then she headed toward the stairs.

"Queen Elsa!" the guard on duty for the dungeon exclaimed in surprise up the stairs after her. He had never seen Elsa punish anyone that way, but from what he had heard of the conversation, he had no issue with what she had done. "Is there anything you would like me to do?"

Elsa turned back halfway up the stairs. "Yes. I believe one of the terrorist people may have some sort of communication device. Please have them all searched," she said, realizing that that had to have been why the newest four intruders had gotten in. "Also, see what useful information can be obtained from them about exactly what they were up to. You can scare them to get it, but please do not physically hurt them."

"Of course, my queen."

"One more thing. Did I…kill any of them? Before?" Elsa asked hesitantly.

The guard shook his head. "Oh, no, Queen Elsa. You did give one of them some nasty-looking frostbite and a couple others were injured, but they're fine. I don't know why you should care though, if I may say so."

Elsa nodded gratefully and gave the guard a sincere smile. "Thank you, sir." _All right. I can deal with that. I might have been a bad person, but at least I didn't kill anyone._

Elsa went out into the courtyard and coated all of the castle's outer walls with impenetrable, slippery ice so they could not be scaled before doing anything else.

* * *

"I'm fine, Anna, really," Elsa repeated a little while later. "I've had worse, as you well know," she quipped, giving Anna a lopsided smile. "I'm just so, so glad you're all right. That man…" Elsa's smile faded as she thought of what could have happened. "That man would have done a…a really bad thing," she said softly.

Anna frowned, not entirely sure what Elsa meant. Of course threatening to shoot someone in the head was a 'really bad thing'. Elsa herself was hurt, too. She had two broken fingers, for goodness sakes. "Yeah, shooting me in the head is bad, but I get the feeling that's not what you mean," Anna replied, trying to be lighthearted.

Elsa could only stare at Anna. "Anna, a bad person like that man doesn't throw a girl on the floor like that just to shoot her. I know Kristoff has showed you some self-defense stuff. I would have thought he'd have told you such things," Elsa said awkwardly. _I don't think Anna knows just how much danger she was in…_

"Well, he did say don't let yourself get pinned on the ground, but I thought he just meant because it was harder to fight back at that point."

"Well," Elsa answered, matching Anna's tone exactly, "that man wanted to do bad things to you, not kill you. I think I will sleep in the same room with you until everything is straightened out. And," she iced over Anna's window, along with all of the rest of the outside of the castle, "nobody will be getting in through the windows anymore. I keep figuring it'll be okay now, but I'm leaving the castle protected with my ice. Permanently, whether there's any immediate danger or not."

Anna finally understood what Elsa meant, and she climbed back into bed and pulled Elsa in after her, suddenly feeling scared. What if Elsa _hadn't_ shown up when she had? Or if either she or Elsa had freaked out? Anna shuddered, but she immediately felt better when she felt Elsa put a protective arm around her. "Thanks, Elsa," Anna whispered.

Elsa just nodded and hugged her baby sister tighter. Now that the danger was over (at least for now) and the adrenaline had worn off, her hand really hurt and she was exhausted. She just wanted to sleep. But Anna was okay, and she herself had not killed anyone with her magic. And Dark Elsa was back where she belonged, not in control. "I owe Kristoff a major thank-you tomorrow," Elsa said suddenly. "What he said on the way home from the trolls-that I could use the good parts of my dark side _and_ regular me-was really helpful."

Anna grinned, delighted that Elsa no longer seemed upset about anything. She actually seemed pretty relaxed and content at the moment. _Maybe Elsa won't bring up her taking-a-break-and-letting-Dad-be-in-charge-temporarily idea again. I hope she doesn't._

"And maybe Papa will like me better if I'm stronger," Elsa added softly.

"Hmph, he should like you just like you are," Anna said rather huffily. She turned out the lamp and flopped down under the covers, keeping one arm around Elsa protectively. "G'night, Elsa."

"Good night, Anna." _Tomorrow I am investigating just what those people were up to-their main plan._

 **A/N: Let's just say it is NOT a good idea to make Elsa mad. At all. We're gearing up for the end soon, so get ready!:)**

 **Next chapter coming soon!**


	38. Chapter 38

**A/N: Thanks to everyone who's followed/favorited and/or is reading but not reviewing.:)**

 **Elsa Tomago-I'm glad you liked it:) Don't worry, Elsa won't abdicate-but she's not going to drop the idea easily, either.:P At this point she just wants to make Agdar happy with her, since Anna did manage to convince her that abdicating obviously won't get rid of her literal power (ie., her magic:)). That scene was tricky to write (again, by now it's easy for Elsa to use her magic to defend Anna if need be), so I'm glad you liked it:)**

 **Olivia O'Neil-Thank you:)**

 **IndyGirl89-Well, they weren't counting on Anna making noise and fighting back herself, either. I do think Elsa does have sensitive ears to things being amiss in her home, but she's not a mind-reader, either, so the noise Anna made was enough to get Elsa to come:)**

 **FluffyKitten-Lol, you aren't necessarily supposed to like Dark Elsa. She isn't perfect, and her dark side shows that. Elsa doesn't literally have godlike power (she's 100% human and obviously can be hurt or killed by conventional means), but Anna and Kristoff were thinking that because she's much, much stronger than seems logical. I'm glad you liked Kristoff's input, and yes, I would spoil the kitten too.;) Lol, that insane number is actually based on an article I read where someone actually calculated how much energy would be needed to freeze the real life fjord Arendelle's fjord is based on. That crazy number is the result. Yeah, these intruders aren't redeemable. At all. I'm glad you liked the chapter:)**

 **moohamquest-I like badass Elsa too, lol:) I agree, Dark Elsa really isn't that dark...she's just a stronger, angry version of her normal self, really.:P**

 **raven678-Elsa actually still doesn't know everything her magic did, though. But yes, she is better now.:) Elsa hates lying, so that really bothered her-Anna was willing to do that because she thought it would protect Elsa.:P Well, in my mind, Kristoff sort of told Anna why you don't let yourself get pinned on the ground but she didn't quite get it. Anna is a little naive sometimes.:P I've addressed the issue of the repeated breakins in this chapter, and Meri does come back.:)**

 **On to the story!**

Elsa jerked awake early the next morning when someone knocked on Anna's room's door. It was close to the time she usually got up anyway, so she didn't mind too much.

"Miss Elsa, you have an important visitor," Kai called from the hallway. "He says it's extremely urgent."

"Does he realize it's six thirty in the morning?" Elsa didn't mind getting up early, but she didn't appreciate people wanting meetings RIGHT THIS SECOND just after she got up. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. "Kai, who is it exactly?"

"The king of the Southern Isles…"

"Well, tell him I will meet him in the Great Hall at seven, please," Elsa replied after a moment. She had met King Boris before, and she had no wish to meet him again. _All right, Elsa, be polite. You can do that._

* * *

"Gerda, will you please braid my hair?" Elsa asked a few minutes later in the kitchen.

Gerda simply sat Elsa down in a chair and began braiding. She was actually rather happy that Elsa would ask her to do that; usually Elsa just did it herself, and Gerda remembered fixing Elsa's hair when she was little before the accident. "Miss Elsa, what happened to your hand?" Gerda asked quietly. "You were fine last night."

Elsa bit her lip, unsure whether to tell Gerda exactly what had happened or not. _I don't want to worry Gerda…_ "I, um…accidentally slammed a door on it?" she offered, knowing quite well that Gerda wouldn't believe that. _Elsa, you hate lying. Why would you say that? You trust Gerda, and you want her to trust you, too._

"Queen Elsa, that's a lie, and you know that I know it," Gerda said firmly. She finished Elsa's braid and then sat down across from her at the small kitchen table. "I think that it might have something to do with why the castle is protected with your ice all over outside." When Elsa just nodded in reply, Gerda's stern worried expression disappeared and she just gave Elsa a reassuring smile instead. "I won't try to make you tell me exactly what's going on, Miss Elsa, as you most certainly do not have to do any such thing, but if you feel like you need help, please ask for it," Gerda told her. "You do _not_ have to handle everything on your own."

"I know, and I'm sorry. I just…I just don't want you to worry." _That's no excuse for lying, Elsa. You just got all upset with Anna for lying to you for a similar reason._ Elsa looked down, not quite sure what to say. "I have a meeting in fifteen minutes," she said finally. "I don't want to go."

Gerda frowned. "Miss Elsa, don't apologize to me like that. You're the queen. And I will have some pancakes ready for you after your meeting…how does that sound?"

Elsa hesitated before simply giving Gerda a hug. Gerda would not mind if she hugged her, unlike her daddy would mind if she gave him a hug. _Papa used to scold me for apologizing too, but he wasn't…nice about it like Gerda, either._ She felt better when she felt Gerda willingly returning the hug. _Okay, Elsa, you can do this._

* * *

Right outside the Great Hall a few minutes later, Kai looked Elsa right in the eyes as he quickly told her what he knew of why the king of the Southern Isles was there. "He needs Arendelle's help with something, Miss Elsa. It's not the same arrogant man that we saw before. But don't show any weakness if you can help it," Kai said quickly. "Should you decide to help him and his country, make him work to get your assistance." Kai knew how Elsa was; if she thought she could help, she would instantly go along with whatever the king said as long as she thought Arendelle would still be safe.

Elsa nodded, easily understanding. She could not appear too generous with her help or King Boris would take advantage of her sooner or later. _Don't show any weakness…wait a minute._ "What about my limp?" she asked, glancing down at her bad leg.

Kai just waved that concern off. "Doesn't matter, Miss Elsa. You cannot help that," he said firmly. Kai reached for the door to announce her, but then paused. "Miss Elsa, do _not_ let him make you think it matters, either. Or anything else," Kai added, frowning as he noticed Elsa's injured hand for the first time. "No answering personal questions about yourself, either." _What happened last night that Elsa hasn't told anyone about?_

"Queen Elsa, to be blunt, we are in dire need of help," Boris said when Elsa asked why he had come to Arendelle.

"I daresay so considering you have come to me, someone I know you do not like," Elsa deadpanned. "Details, please."

"The feeling is mutual, perhaps?"

Elsa merely gave him her best stone face. "Details, please," she said, ignoring the previous question. "I owe you and your country nothing, to say the least."

"My country needs your help, Elsa," Boris repeated.

"I know that already or you would not be here," Elsa deadpanned. She sat up straighter, not liking how Boris hadn't used her title. It wasn't that Elsa minded being called only by her given name, but she did not like Boris and she knew, by all protocol, that he was being rude. "I do have a title, same as you," she added.

Boris stepped back, abruptly realizing his mistake. Elsa was so young he still balked at treating her as a respected equal, let alone showing the deference he knew he should be giving her if he wanted her help. Elsa _didn't_ owe the Southern Isles anything; he was lucky she hadn't decided to take it over like she had Weselton. "Queen Elsa, the Southern Isles has suffered from multiple attacks on the royal family. Never the general public, just the royal family. I believe they are all connected to some sort of organization that is searching for new weapons. Magical ones, to be specific."

Elsa thought for a moment, figuring that those attacks were probably by the same terrorist group that her own country had been dealing with. "And what exactly have you come to me for?" she asked.

"My daughter, Princess Kiara, for one. I know she sponges off you for some reason."

Immediately Elsa's face clouded over as she stood up. "Your daughter does not 'sponge off me'. She is my friend," Elsa said firmly. "What do you want with Kiara now all of a sudden? She ran away from home because of the way her family was treating her."

"Well…she has magic. She claims it's gone now, but-"

"What difference does that make?" Elsa interrupted sharply. A sinking feeling settled in her stomach as she realized what the most likely reasoning was. _He wants to give Kiara to those bad people because he thinks they'll leave his country alone after that,_ she thought.

"If all the attackers want is magic, well…there are thirteen princes ahead of her in line, you know. Twelve now…What does one girl matter to you, Queen Elsa? She's nothing to you. Especially Kiara…I know she is the reason for that crippled leg," Boris said carefully.

The temperature in the room abruptly plummeted. "Get out of my castle and don't you ever come here again." Elsa's voice was quiet but held a clear threat. She did not care what Boris said about her leg, but she was not going to put up with him implying that her friend wasn't worth anything. "If you step one toe in my country again…if you hurt Kiara, I _promise_ you I will cause you more trouble than those terrorists ever could." She held out a barely controlled swirl of crackling ice magic in her good hand, her blue eyes dark in anger. "Get out of here. Now," she ordered. _Elsa, don't lose control. He isn't worth it. Kiara is safe upstairs._

Boris bowed hurriedly and speed-walked away. He had no wish to deal with an angry queen with strong magic.

"I would have helped you if you simply asked and explained what was going on, you know," Elsa said to his retreating back.

Boris hesitated. Maybe if he asked again and apologized, Elsa would still help him. "Is there anything I could-"

"No," came Elsa's instant reply.

"If I were to-" Boris tried again.

"No."

"What about-"

"No. Get out before I throw you out." Elsa could feel herself shaking in anger, and she just wanted Boris to leave before she did something she knew she would regret. Part of her just wanted to cry. How could someone be willing to hand his own daughter over to a group of terrorists? _Even Papa actually defended me. He would never have done something like that to me,_ she thought. Then, _Really, Elsa? You really think he wouldn't have before? When you couldn't control your powers?_

"If-"

"Get. OUT!"

* * *

"Miss Elsa, it's all right, he's gone," Kai said quickly when he came into the Great Hall after escorting King Boris to the door and sending a few guards with him down to the dock to make sure he left Arendelle. He frowned; Elsa wasn't on her throne anymore-she was sitting curled up in a corner facing the wall, the floor around her covered with ice. "Miss Elsa, what happened?" Kai asked quietly as he knelt beside her.

"He wanted me t-to give him Kiara, a-and…and-" _And your mind went off to horrible ideas of what Papa might have done, Elsa. What is wrong with you?_ Elsa broke off and just shook her head, keeping her arms wrapped around her middle, hugging herself.

Kai waited patiently for Elsa to explain; it took a few minutes for her to calm down enough to speak clearly and rationally again, but she told Kai the entire conversation between herself and the Southern Isles king. Kai said nothing until he had heard the whole story. "I think, perhaps, that you were a mite hasty in kicking him out, Miss Elsa," Kai said carefully when Elsa asked if she had done anything wrong. "Not _wrong_ , though. I do understand why you threw him out-I know your friend means a lot to you." He paused before adding, "Miss Elsa, I'm not entirely sure the new attitude you have is good for you. You've been…different since that weird serum got into you, and I know it's worn off by now."

Elsa's whole countenance crumpled a bit, and she scooted farther into the corner. "I'm sorry, I just…I don't know. I d-don't want to be that…that…weak, pitiful little girl anymore…" she said softly. _But I still am. I got mad at King Boris, but I started crying the second he was gone. I didn't panic, though. I was just really upset…_

"You were never a 'weak, pitiful little girl', Miss Elsa," Kai told her firmly. "A depressed, anxiety-ridden girl, yes, but those other things, absolutely not. I have no idea exactly how that serum affected you mentally, but whatever your dark side told you about your normal self is _not_ true. We don't want to lose the sweet young lady we all love so much just as she is for an anger-prone, pardon the pun, cold, ice queen. I am NOT, however, saying that you should never get angry. That isn't good either."

"Wouldn't you like me better if I didn't cry and get upset so much?" Elsa asked hopefully.

Kai said nothing for a moment and just gave her a hug, not particularly caring if he was supposed to do that or not. _Is that what this is about? Seriously?!_ "No, I would not, because people who genuinely love you will love you just the way you are," Kai replied gently. "They won't try to change you."

"But Papa-"

"Queen Elsa, listen to me," Kai said firmly, looking Elsa right in the eyes. "That father of yours is not going to give you that love you want so badly no matter what you do, at least not right now. I do believe he cares about you, but he isn't going to love you unconditionally the way your little sister does, because he is prejudiced. You can't force yourself to be something you aren't."

"I did before!" Elsa protested. _I'm just…terrified to do that again. I think I'd die. Literally._

"Did you really?" Kai asked, his harsh tone not matching the caring expression on his face. "You know as well as I do that concealing your powers was wrong. Your father abused you, Miss Elsa, and you know it. He locked you away and treated you like the dirt on the bottom of a shoe for _years_. You never fought back to speak of, either. It takes a different kind of strength and courage to deal with what you went through."

Elsa could only stare incredulously; she just couldn't see herself that way. She knew her _magic_ was strong, but otherwise she didn't think that at all. "But I was terrified…all the time," she muttered finally. "And…a-and hurting…"

"That's exactly what courage is-strength in the face of pain or grief, or the ability to do something that frightens one," Kai replied quickly. "I know you think differently, Miss Elsa, but I _know_ the real-you has never really changed, not even after all that time."

"Real-me?" Elsa asked, puzzled.

"Yes, the real-you," Kai repeated. "She may be so-called 'damaged', but she's the same person she's always been, and she's perfectly fine just the way she is. Don't let _anything_ -not your father, not your enemies, not your own thoughts-tell you different."

Elsa made a face. "What if I don't like that person?"

"Then you had better learn to like her," Kai said matter-of-factly. "Your problem is _not_ fear. Your problem is that you still inwardly treat yourself like garbage sometimes and therefore assume everyone else will too. Like this morning you went from being angry and defending your friend-a perfectly legitimate and reasonable response-to making yourself upset because you're worried that your father might have been willing to treat you the way King Boris was willing to treat his own daughter. Miss Elsa, _please_ talk to someone about how you're feeling more. I know you don't like talking about such things, but maybe more talking would help. The new Elsa that gets angry easily isn't healthy any more than being scared of everything is, because she isn't you, either. Does that make sense?"

Elsa nodded. _Thank you. A lot._

Kai gave her a reassuring smile and stood up. "Why don't you just sit for a few minutes and then have breakfast? I'll leave so you can have a bit of time by yourself.

"Okay. Thank you."

* * *

"Here's your breakfast, Miss Elsa," Gerda said a little while later. "Now I have a little job for you while you're eating, if you don't mind." Elsa actually smiled (she liked that Gerda would give her a 'job'), and Gerda handed her paper and a pen. "All right, I want you to write at least fifteen or twenty words or short phrases that you feel describe yourself. They can be good things, bad things, or just neutral. Whatever you like. Then in another column, I want the same number of things, but ones that describe your sister."

Elsa tilted her head to one side in confusion. _Gerda wants me to describe Anna? Why?_ "What's this for?"

"You'll see."

Soon Elsa had finished her breakfast and Gerda's little assignment, and she bit her lip as she handed the paper to Gerda. What if she had put the wrong things down? Elsa watched Gerda's face closely while Gerda read what she'd written down. _Gerda doesn't seem upset with me, anyways,_ she thought happily.

"Miss Elsa, look what you wrote here," Gerda said quietly a minute later. Gerda wasn't entirely pleased with what Elsa had chosen to put down-Elsa had put a few things about herself that weren't even true-but the main logic behind the experiment had worked. "You put 'loves Anna and rest of family and friends and country' in your column, and 'loves me and everyone else' in your sister's. You also put that you both like chocolate, and that you both enjoy chess and reading, and that you both enjoy playing with your magic together, among other things." Gerda paused and just gave the girl a hug. "I see a lot of exact opposites on here too. If I took the names off the columns, which girl would you think is better?"

Predictably enough Elsa pointed at Anna's list.

"And which one would you be more likely to walk up and talk to and make friends with?"

This time Elsa hesitated, but finally pointed at her own list, determined to be honest. She did not like just randomly walking up to people and talking to them, but she knew she would rather talk to a quiet girl she didn't know rather than a noisy, bouncy one like her baby sister. Plus that quiet girl probably wasn't good at talking and making friends, either.

"Which of them deserve nice things?"

Elsa immediately pointed at Anna's list again, her blue eyes clouding with tears.

"Then why did you pick the way you did on the second question?" Gerda asked gently. "If the girl described in your own column doesn't deserve nice things, why would you want to make friends with her?"

Elsa only shook her head and didn't answer. _I don't know, really. I guess I was still seeing the two columns as Anna and me, not two random girls. If they were two random girls, I guess…I guess I'd probably have said both._

"I think you know why, Miss Elsa," Gerda told her as she gave Elsa's good hand a reassuring squeeze. "I have one more question for you: how do you think Anna would have answered?"

Now Elsa's expression brightened. She was positive she knew exactly what Anna would have said. "Me, both of us, both of us," she replied quickly.

"I think the correct answers should be both of you all the way through," Gerda replied with a smile, "although I do think you said exactly what your sister would have said. And we will know later, because I am going to give her the same assignment later today. Then the two of you can compare lists."

"Okay," Elsa replied agreeably. "And Gerda?"

Gerda just looked at her expectantly. "Yes?"

"May I please always have breakfast here in the kitchen from now on? It's…nice. And cozy. And if I'm already in here, I could help you some, too, like with cleaning up and everything. You always work so hard and I want to help repay the favor," Elsa explained.

"Miss Elsa, you are welcome to have meals here at the kitchen table whenever you like, but you do _not_ have to help 'with cleaning up and everything'," Gerda said, frowning. "You pay me good money to work here. It's my job. To be honest I don't trust anyone else to make your food. With all the trouble we've had, I'd be worried someone might try to poison you or your sister. Also, there _are_ other servants in this castle, as you know already-I just don't allow them in the kitchen. My domain, thank you very much."

Elsa stifled a giggle at that. "Gerda, if you don't mind, I'd really like to help if you'd let me," she said in her most serious voice. "I promise I'd do exactly what you tell me. Maybe I could set aside an hour every morning right before or after breakfast or something."

Gerda put her hands on her hips and stared at her. "You want to help scrub the floor and wash dishes?"

Elsa looked down at her broken fingers and made a face. _I'd probably be mostly useless to Gerda right now._ "Well, maybe not right now, but once my hand is better, yes," she answered.

"You'll mess up your nice clothes," Gerda pointed out, her resolve not to let Elsa help weakening.

"I'll wear an apron."

"If your daddy ever comes to visit and finds out, he's not going to like that…"

Now Elsa's expression darkened. "I don't care. If I'm the queen and I have absolute authority, then I can help in the kitchen if I want to," Elsa said, her voice suddenly stronger. "Gerda, I…I was going to let Papa take over my position temporarily," she started, but then Gerda interrupted her.

"Elsa Ingrid Nicoletta Grieg, that is the worst idea I've ever heard!" Gerda exclaimed. "Miss Elsa, let me tell you right now I will not respect that man as monarch of this country ever again. _You_ are the reigning monarch of Arendelle, not him. I'll not have him hurting one of the little girls I had the privilege to help raise yet again, and that is exactly what will happen. I don't have any daughters of my own, but I love you and the princess like you were my own." She instinctively hugged Elsa close, suddenly feeling very protective of the girl. _I will not let Elsa be hurt again if I can help it. I still remember how Elsa's parents treated her when she was just a baby, and I couldn't even really do anything about it…_

"Gerda, you…y-you _love_ me l-like…like I was yours?" Elsa heard herself say. While Elsa knew Gerda definitely loved and cared for her, it still seemed unbelievable to her that a grown-up could truly love her the way a good parent would. She didn't understand how Gerda could say such a thing. Wouldn't Gerda have wanted a normal child too?

Gerda's eyes filled with tears at the tone of Elsa's question. "Yes, Miss Elsa. I don't understand why that's so unbelievable." _She doesn't even sound like she believes me. She sounds completely incredulous._ Gerda remembered the way little eight-year-old Elsa had acted right after the accident. Trying to comfort twelve-year-old Elsa when her magic had abruptly grown much stronger very quickly. Stopping eighteen-year-old Elsa's suicide attempt. Gerda wondered what Elsa's parents would have done if they had been present when Elsa had tried that, and she held Elsa closer. _They might have punished her for that…_

"What would you have done with me after the accident?" Elsa asked curiously, half terrified of the answer Gerda might give her.

Gerda pursed her lips at that question. "Well, _first_ I would have found out exactly what happened," she replied immediately. She mulled it over for a minute before continuing. "I'd probably have forbidden you two to play with your magic together except under strict supervision, at least until you were both older. If I _had_ made the mistake of separating the two of you, I would certainly have let you both talk through the door, and after seeing keeping you isolated wasn't helpful in the least, I'd try something else. Perhaps no magic unless you were by yourself, but make sure you had time every day to go practice using it. I don't know. But I think most _anything_ would have been better than what happened, Miss Elsa. I don't blame them for that first instinctive reaction, but I put full blame on them for not trying something else after a few days and it wasn't helping. There was also absolutely no reason why the two of you couldn't talk to each other through that door."

Elsa looked down at her hands, remembering the gloves. "What if, after all that trying, I still couldn't control it?" she asked quietly. "Would you have put gloves on me?"

"Miss Elsa, you're forgetting one thing. If you had been treated properly, you would have learned the key to controlling your powers much, much sooner," Gerda told her gently. "It never would have been such an issue in the first place." She carefully took Elsa's injured hand and held it up. "Does your magic feel like it wants to get out just because you can't use it with this hand, even if you wanted to?"

"No, it just feels…normal. It knows it can't get out that way because my hand is hurt."

"That's just it. I think your magic _knows_ what to do automatically if you let it. It just doesn't like forced containment. The longer you forced it to stay inside, the harder it was to control. Not only were you growing up and your magic getting stronger, you were forcing _years'_ worth of magic to remain contained…" Gerda's voice trailed off, realizing more implications of what she was saying. "Miss Elsa…you were forcing all of that power that let you freeze Arendelle last summer to stay inside you," she said quietly. "You just…I'm proud of you."

"For _freezing my country_?!" Elsa asked in surprise.

"No, no, no! You're much stronger than you or any of us give you credit for. Not your literal power magic-wise, Miss Elsa, but inside. Don't you understand? You didn't know it, but you loved Anna and the rest of Arendelle so much that you _willed_ a tremendous amount of power not to explode everywhere…for _thirteen years_. Those 'power mistakes' you made so often in your room were a tiny pittance compared to how much magic you really have."

"5,800,000,000,000,000 joules," Elsa said softly, remembering the calculations she had made the day before. She tilted her head to one side in confusion. "If I have that much magic inside me, why don't I explode into a million pieces?"

Gerda couldn't help chuckling at Elsa's confused expression. "I don't know, Miss Elsa-you have magic inside you, not an explosive like dynamite. I doubt it obeys all of the ordinary laws of physics and the like."

"I know, but still!"

* * *

LATE THAT AFTERNOON…

"Again," Kristoff said firmly. "You're stronger than that, Elsa. Don't go easy on me or Anna because you're worried you'll hurt us. That's what we put on all the winter clothes for." He was trying to help Elsa be more comfortable using her magic, and in the process teach her some of the self-defense moves he had taught Anna. "Anna, come here, will ya? I want your sister to see something."

Elsa watched in surprise as her little sister got a knife away from Kristoff in a few seconds, tossed it away out of reach, and then had him on his knees a moment later. "But…you're going easy on Anna, right?" she asked Kristoff, not entirely understanding how Anna could have done that when she weighed less than half of what Kristoff did.

"We're practicing with a dull knife, yes, but that's it, Elsa," Kristoff replied honestly. "So in a real fight, you might end up with a cut on your arm or hand, but that's it. It has to do with leverage and playing up your strengths to your opponent's weaknesses. The knife scenario is pretty useless for you-you could just freeze the knife, obviously, but I just wanted you to see that someone else about your size can totally defend herself, even without magic." He rubbed his neck awkwardly, unsure how to word the rest of what he wanted to explain. "Anna told me what happened last night. You guys are both pretty girls, and that means you have to know how to fight. Period. Anna, you are physically stronger than Elsa is if she's not using her magic, so, Elsa, you can start by sparring with her. Since y'all are about the same size, I'm going to say the object is for one of you to get the other on her back."

Anna scowled. "What about Elsa's hand? She's already hurt, and that's not fair to her, and-"

"She might be hurt if she actually has to defend herself, too," Kristoff interrupted. "Just be careful with her left hand, that's all. It'll be fine. Don't go easy on her otherwise. Ready?"

Both girls nodded…and before Elsa could think, she was flat on her back on the soft snow 'mat' they were using to cushion falls. "That's no fair! I didn't even have time to do anything," Elsa protested, still not having any idea of what Anna had done. _Anna is good! She totally could have fought better last night all by herself. She must have panicked and forgotten what to do or something._

Anna helped Elsa to her feet and quickly showed Elsa exactly what she had done. "I just swiped your feet from under you and pushed you over," she explained, showing Elsa in slow motion. "Stand like this," Anna added, trying to change Elsa's stance.

Elsa frowned and sighed in frustration. "I can't. My brace won't-"

"Can too," Kristoff said firmly, adjusting Elsa's position himself, which made Elsa flinch. "It doesn't have to be exactly like Anna's, Elsa. You just want a wider, more stable base, that's all. You two try again. You can use your magic this time, but you can't use it directly on Anna."

Elsa grinned. This time she merely iced the snowy 'mat' with her most slippery ice and Anna was instantly on the ground without Elsa having done anything. Anna huffed in annoyance but laughed good-naturedly when she saw Elsa's mischievous expression.

"Ok, let's try something else," Kristoff said now, still laughing. "Elsa, your new job is to get up from being pinned on the ground. Same magic rules-you can use it, but not directly on Anna." Kristoff knew quite well that Elsa probably would follow that rule more or less in a real fight because of how she hated hurting people with her powers, so he figured if Elsa could defend herself well following said rule, then she would be a hundred percent fine in a real fight since she wouldn't be quite so careful as she was with Anna.

Elsa's instinctive response was to simply drop the surface temperature of her skin so she was too cold to touch, but Anna was wearing winter clothes and so this didn't help. She just lay still for a few seconds, trying to think what to do, and Kristoff sighed. "Elsa, that's way, way too long," he said quietly. "Just try _something._ "

"I can't! Anna pinned my hands," Elsa said helplessly. What on earth was she supposed to do? She tried to pull her hands free, but Anna's grip was firm, although Anna wasn't hurting her the least bit.

Kristoff told her what to do, and Elsa finally managed to free herself. "That's why, if at all possible, you never, _never_ let yourself get pinned on the ground. It's easy to panic and it's difficult to fight back. Elsa, I know you don't want to do this to Anna, but you could have just tossed your opponent away from you with your magic, even with your hands pinned. The technique I showed you works, but using your magic is a hundred times better."

"And, this is something I stupidly forgot to do last night, but Kristoff said to yell 'Fire', not 'Help'," Anna put in. "I mean, you can fight back yourself, but still."

Elsa frowned, not understanding. "Why would you yell 'Fire' instead of 'Help'?" she asked curiously.

"Because, there's a chance the assailant might leave you alone if they think there's a fire, and also people are more likely to help stop a fire than help one person," Kristoff said flatly. "Trust me. I've seen it before. Experienced it too. Not now, but when I was a kid. Yelling 'Fire!' in a tavern sends everyone running out, even the ones trying to steal your bit of money." He shrugged. "That's just the way it is, I guess. Anyways. Oh yeah, one more thing…Elsa, you have got to learn to be willing to defend yourself, even if nobody else is in danger. Your guards are absolutely terrible. Last night was the umpteenth time somebody has gotten into yours or Anna's room."

Anna put her hands on her hips. " _You_ were sleeping out in the stables last night with Sven, and you didn't hear anything," she pointed out.

"Yeah, because I'd like to think I don't have to be on edge every night when I sleep within the royal castle's walls!" Kristoff retorted. "It's ridiculous. If Elsa's guards were doing their jobs, she should _never_ have to even try to fight with her magic. She's the queen. Her job is supposed to be Arendelle's politics government and paperwork stuff. Not fighting for her country or to defend herself or you."

The sisters exchanged glances but said nothing.

"And, how many royal young women like you guys do you think learn self-defense at all? Probably none, I'd guess, because you are supposed to have guards that do that for you!" Kristoff paused before adding a hurried, "Sorry, Q-Elsa, I know it's not really any of my business."

"I protected the walls and the castle itself with ice," Elsa said quietly after a moment. "It shouldn't happen again."

"Elsa, that's not my point. I don't think you should have had to do that in the first place. And it makes it look-at least to me-that you don't feel safe in your own home," Kristoff said slowly.

Elsa thought for a moment and then just covered her protective ice with ornate decorations and detailed spires on the roof, a bit like her own ice palace. "There. Now it just looks like I decided to decorate the castle," she said, smiling. _Kristoff is right, though…_ "And…maybe I could hire more guards. And interview the ones we already have to make sure they're honest and know exactly what their responsibilities are." Elsa paused as a new idea popped into her head. _Everyone keeps telling me it's okay to ask for help, so…_ "Kristoff, I should like for you to do the interviews, if you're willing. Anna will help you. I don't think I should do them, and…a-and I don't like talking to lots of people anyways."

Kristoff blushed, flattered that Elsa would be willing to trust him with an important job like that. "Well, I, uh…you know, wouldn't know how to hold interviews," he said awkwardly. "But thanks all the same."

"Kai will help you two if you need it," Elsa told him and Anna.

"Thanks, Elsa."

* * *

A minute later, the three of them were startled by a girl with curly red hair walking toward them. "Queen Elsa? I'm the girl that, um, tried to kidnap you the other day. You promised to help me find and rescue my little brothers if I helped you get Princess Anna back," the girl said in her accented English, dropping an awkward curtsy at Elsa. "Oh, and give you all the information I have about the terrorists. Your guard at the gate let me in," she added, wanting Elsa to know that she had not broken in, not that it would have been possible to scale the slippery ice anyway.

Elsa nodded. "Of course. Shall we head inside?"

Elsa took the girl to the dining hall and asked Anna to bring back some snack-food of some kind. "Cookies and milk or something," Elsa suggested. Then she turned attention back to…Meri. That was the girl's name, Elsa remembered now.

"Ok, so, first of all, the terrorist people think I'm still working for them," Meri began. She quickly explained to Elsa what she had done: convinced them that she could befriend Elsa to get information from her, when really, she would give Elsa information about the terrorists instead. "This way I can get us into their secret headquarters without having to fight our way in," Meri explained, a proud edge to her voice.

" _Us_?" Elsa asked pointedly. "And how do I know that, as a double agent, you won't betray me? Because that is exactly what a double agent does-betrays both sides."

"Because I want you to help my little brothers, and you won't if I do that," Meri replied honestly, looking Elsa right in the face. She kind of thought Elsa was a bit too much of a prim and proper prissy type, what with wearing that sparkly blue dress for everyday and just the way she acted (Elsa was _clearly_ a girly girl in Meri's mind). But she _had_ seen Elsa fight back with her magic. That definitely did not fit those prim and proper prissy ideas she had. _And_ , Meri thought to herself, eyeing the bandage on Elsa's temple where she'd knocked herself out, _some annoying Miss Priss wouldn't have gotten into a situation where she would have gotten hurt in the first place._

"I see," Elsa replied cryptically, although she gave the younger girl a friendly smile. "What did you mean by 'us'?" she asked again. Elsa had the feeling that Meri was profiling her in a way, which made Elsa a bit uncomfortable, but she was determined not to show it.

"This," Meri replied, pushing a folded-up paper across the table to Elsa. "That's the complete floor plan of their headquarters. Queen Elsa, you have some friends in the States that have been taken hostage. They're being held here," she said pointing at a certain spot on the floor plan. "I _think_ one of them would know where my brothers are. Also, you made a giant mess with your magic while you were under that serum's effects. There's unseasonable winter weather all over the place outside Arendelle. You only left Corona and the Southern Isles alone."

Elsa was taken aback by this, but she managed to keep her expression neutral. "I did _what_?"

"You made it snow. Over a foot of it. In Florida."

Elsa frowned, trying to remember just where that was. _That's a long ways south from here. It should be warm there most of the year…_

"And, there's a snow monster stealing little kids from abusive homes," Meri went on. "Look." She pulled a cell phone out of her pocket and pulled up a news article on the internet so she could prove what she'd just said was true. After Elsa had read it, Meri put it away and added, "I think I like the dark version of you. She's pretty badass." Her eyes sparkled as she asked, "Are you going to take over or something? I'll bet you could do that without even leaving Arendelle!"

Elsa ignored this, but she bit her lip as she realized something else. "What about Weselton?" she asked quietly. _My parents are there, and if I meddled with the weather there, Papa is going to be so angry with me._

"All snowed in. And the U.S. is going to invade in a couple days. We've got to fix everything before then if you don't want that to happen." Meri paused, realizing that Elsa might have still had that neutral expression on her face, but she was clearly upset. _She doesn't want to take over anything. She just wants her own country safe, that's all._ "Queen Elsa, you can just reverse all the winter weather, right? I mean, you thawed Arendelle last year, didn't you?"

"Jeg har virkelig gjort det denne gangen... jeg gjorde et stort rot av alt," Elsa mumbled, lapsing into her native Norwegian as she looked down at her hands. _I've_ _really done it this time. I made a huge, huge mess of everything._ Her blue eyes shone with unshed tears as she looked up at Meri and tried her best to blink the tears away. "What do you know of what they want?" Elsa asked, abruptly switching back to English, using the dignified voice she reserved only for situations where emotions needed to remain hidden.

Meri frowned. "One of the members of the terrorist group is close to the president and convinced him it was a good idea. Both sides want you for experimental purposes, and at this point, if you don't come willingly, they'll capture you instead. The president because of the winter mess you made, and the terrorists because they just don't care. They need you alive, but otherwise they don't care. They would hurt you, but they won't kill you."

"How do they intend to do that since they already know what I can do?" Elsa asked, her voice tense. "I do not like to fight, but if my people are in danger, I will."

"They were after your sister last night. If they had succeeded, that's how they would have captured you. All they have to do is take her away from here without you knowing where, threaten her life, and everyone knows you'll do anything they want," Meri said slowly. She had no wish to see an angry Elsa again. Normal Elsa seemed nice, but she knew pushing Elsa's buttons could only lead to trouble.

"Well, they failed," Elsa shot back, frost crackling under her good hand resting on the table.

Meri nodded. "I know. So, alternate plan: catch the queen unawares when she is alone outside the castle and take her back to headquarters. That is supposed to be my job." She dug in her large bag for a moment and pulled out a strange box that Elsa eyed warily. "These are made from a composite material that's strong and extra resistant to extreme cold. I, um…helped come up with 'em. Now I hope they don't work…"

"Hope _what_ doesn't work?" Elsa's tone was sharp; she involuntarily flinched backwards when Meri opened the box even though she knew quite well what those things were. "Those look like a modern technology torture device," she said softly. "I can indeed break out of metal shackles easily, but I've never seen anything like those in my life." _Elsa, just shut up. You know Meri's trying to help, but there's no need to appear emotional in front of her. You don't know her well enough yet._

"That's because that's…kind of what they are," Meri replied, shifting in her seat uncomfortably. "I'm positive your magic carries a sort of electrical energy somehow. If you tried to use your magic with them on, you'll charge the internal power source and they'll deliver a painful electrical burn. If they work. You can't 'turn them off', really, either."

Elsa's blue eyes had gone wide in fright, and she was trying her best not to start shaking. All she could think of was how Jade had burned her hands those months ago. That had _hurt_. At least no one was trying to poison Anna this time. _I have to stay calm. What did I expect? These are terrorists-they don't care about hurting people. I imagine they assume they_ need _me injured anyways and would want to keep me that way as long as it didn't kill me. So just…calm down, Elsa._ "Why are you showing me those…things?" she asked finally.

"Because if we're going to get into their headquarters, my plan was to-"

"Feign capturing me," Elsa finished, easily understanding. "Which means you were probably supposed to put those horrid things on me, and we need to know if I can break out of them. Correct?" When Meri nodded, Elsa sat back in resignation and gave a deep sigh. "This means I have to try right now, doesn't it," she said. It was not a question. "All right, very well. But I want someone else in the room when I try that." Elsa's hunch said that Meri was trustworthy, but a bit of her was still hesitant to do that, and she was also scared that her magic really was strong enough to break out of those things but that she'd freak out and not be able to.

"When you try what?" Anna asked curiously as she walked in the Gerda right behind her. "Sorry we took so long with the cookies and milk, I was eating a couple myself and then I saw Olaf for the first time in I don't know how long and…ok, I'll shush now." She looked at Elsa expectantly.

"When I try to break out of those," Elsa replied, still staring at what lay in that box. She took a deep breath before saying quickly, "Okay, I will try right now. Before I change my mind."

* * *

Elsa sat very, very still while Meri fastened the device on her good hand. The only reason she didn't get out of there as fast as she could go was Anna's comforting presence right beside her. She could feel Anna's gentle hold on her injured hand, and that made her feel better. If this did go wrong, Anna was right there and so was Gerda. So there. _I can do this. I just have to get it off-send the whole thing near absolute zero-_ before _it can shock me. Right?_

"Ok, it's ready," Meri said hesitantly. "Don't worry about ruining it-there's another pair if this actually works and we go through with the plan." She pushed the other one closer to the older girl so she could see exactly what it looked like inside, figuring that might help her figure out how to break out of it.

Elsa took a quick glance and then sighed, concentrating hard on what she wanted to do. She clutched Anna's hand as best she could and took another few deep breaths and closed her eyes. _Okay, Elsa. No literal ice shooting. You have to instantaneously drop the thing's temperature, through and through. You have to direct your magic mentally, not merely with your hand._ "Here goes," she murmured to herself…and all at once she felt a horrible burning sensation and instinctively tried to shake her arm free. "Get it off, get it off! _Please_ ," she exclaimed miserably. _It's NOT Jade burning you, Elsa! It's not. Not, not not._ Elsa scrunched her eyes shut tighter and hid her face in Anna's shoulder, her body trembling as she tried not to panic.

Anna sent Meri a scathing look and just hugged Elsa close, knowing Elsa was oblivious to the fact that she had already gotten it off herself. "Elsa, just _breathe_ ," she said quietly in Elsa's ear so only Elsa could hear. "You got it off yourself already."

Elsa nodded slightly, but she didn't move otherwise. _Anna is holding me. Anna did not hurt me,_ she reminded herself. After a minute or two, she finally collected herself completely and looked up at Meri. "Do excuse my outburst. I believe I will simply coat the inside of those horrid things with ice _before_ they're put on and someone else will have to take them off if we use this plan," Elsa said firmly. _I am not risking freaking out like that in a place where we're all in danger._ She narrowed her eyes as she glanced from Anna to Meri and back again. "And I know who will go with me. You," Elsa added, nodding at her sister.

Meri sat back in her chair feeling stung, but she couldn't really blame Elsa for not completely trusting her, either. Except… "Queen Elsa, how's that going to work? They all know what Princess Anna looks like…"

Now Elsa grinned, her terror from that awful experiment completely gone. "You two will switch places. With a change of clothes and some careful makeup and hair fixing, I think it could work. We'll have to try it beforehand, of course, but I think it'll work perfectly."

Gerda frowned from her spot where she'd simply been standing behind Elsa. "If I may add something…I think you girls could certainly pull off a stunt like that, but it's very risky. None of you can be seen as yourselves-or switched selves-until you're near wherever those headquarters are."

"Philadelphia," Meri said helpfully.

"Well, I don't know where that is," Gerda went on, "but I think the three of you may want a second disguise and cover story while you are traveling there. Not only do you have the terrorists out there, I'll bet the genuine United States government is out to get Queen Elsa if her dark side did anything with her magic outside Arendelle. She is a target."

"According to Meri, I made a rather large… _mess_ , to say the least," Elsa said softly.

Gerda gave Elsa's shoulder a reassuring squeeze. "Well then. Disguises and cover story it is, if I may suggest so."

Elsa smiled a bit and nodded. "Anna, would you please take Meri upstairs? Take one guard with you as well." To Meri she said, "I do believe you do not mean us any harm, but I can't take any chances, either. You will have an escort at all times, but otherwise you will be treated as our guest." _That's fair, I think._ She hesitated before adding, "I do not like invading people's privacy, so I will not go through your bag, but you will have to leave it here, please." Elsa noticed Meri about to protest, so she quickly added, "Or you can let Princess Anna go through it once you two are upstairs. Whichever you prefer."

Meri shrugged. "She can go through it if you want her to. I just wanted the rest of my clothes out of it."

The fact that Meri didn't care if she or Anna looked through it only confirmed Elsa's feeling that everything was fine, but Elsa just nodded. "All right then."

* * *

The second Anna and Meri were gone, Gerda took Elsa's good hand to make sure she was all right from breaking out of that weird device. "That awful thing burned you a bit," Gerda scolded, almost as if it might be Elsa's fault. "You come with me, Miss Elsa. I want to put something on that for you."

Elsa willingly followed Gerda to her (Gerda's) room, but she did say, "Gerda, I'm okay, really. I just…got scared, that's all. But I'm all right now." She held out her snowflake to prove her point that yes, her hand was fine and she could use her magic just like always.

"Maybe so, but it won't hurt to put some soothing lotion on it, either. Miss Elsa, there's something else I just thought of. It's going to be difficult to disguise you well enough that no one knows who you are. At this point, I think _everyone_ knows exactly what you look like. And…" Gerda hesitated, not wanting to make Elsa upset.

"And I can't hide my brace because I can't walk without it," Elsa finished, easily knowing exactly what the issue was. She sat down in the chair Gerda pulled out for her and just watched in silence while Gerda gently put the lotion on her hand. "That actually does feel better," she admitted. "Thank you."

"Well, it's significantly better, though," Gerda reminded her. "I know you don't feel comfortable even trying yet, but I really think you could probably walk without it if someone helps you, at least short distances."

"In a couple of days?" Elsa was dubious at that idea; even if she _could_ do that-and she really, really didn't think she could anyways-there was no way she would be comfortable enough doing that soon enough.

Gerda sighed. "Probably not, but that is not the only thing I was about to say, either. Miss Elsa, I may not know much about international law, but I'll bet that sneaking into another country's intelligence agency, even if it has been infiltrated by bad people, is not generally accepted. You're leaving yourself open to be accused of being a vigilante. You also 'made a mess' with your magic, too. Since you were angry and…not yourself when you did that, I'll bet there's significant property damage." She paused, wondering what else she could say that would actually help and not just make Elsa upset. "I will support you no matter what you decide to do, but technically your United States friends are not your country's citizens. You don't have any legal rights to just go rescue them, I don't think…"

Elsa scowled. "If _their_ police and other legal authorities aren't going to save them, someone has to," she said firmly. "I can't just sit here and do nothing!"

"They are bait and you darn well know it, Miss Elsa," Gerda shot back as firmly as she dared. "You have to think of yourself some time. If we lose you-or if you hand yourself over for any reason-Arendelle is in a lot of trouble." Her voice softened when she saw Elsa's stricken expression. "I'm sorry, Miss Elsa. I just don't want to see you hurt again. Those terrorists may not want to kill you, but they can't control you without hurting you. Whether that be physically or breaking your spirit. And they have to control you to use you for whatever schemes they have in mind."

Elsa was quiet for a minute as she mulled over what Gerda had just told her. _Gerda has a point, but…I can't not help. I have to at least try, don't I? And if I caused property damage by whatever my magic did when I was under the influence of that serum, innocent U.S. citizens could have been hurt. What then?_ "I…I'm, that is…I think I need to talk to Kai. I'd appreciate it very much if you'd come with me," she said finally. Kai had assisted her father since before she was born; he would know what to do. "We'll talk in the library."

 **A/N: And their plans are underway.:)**

 **As a side note, I don't speak Norwegian, so I use a translator for Norwegian words/phrases if need be. If the grammar is all wrong, I am very sorry.:) Also, when in doubt, if our MCs are in Arendelle, they are supposed to be speaking Norwegian. Obviously Elsa and her family would not be speaking English when they are at home, lol.:) Elsa may be fluent in multiple languages, but there is no reason for her to not speak her native language unless she has to (hence why she speaks English to Meri, but switched back to Norwegian when she talked to herself for a moment).**

 **A special thank-you to raven678 for pointing out that our gang really needs to figure out why intruders keep getting into the castle. (Of course, the real reason is that All Police/Guard Figures Are Incompetent In Books And Movies, right? Okay, lousy joke.:)) Anyways, it will not be happening anymore-at least not so easily.:))**

 **And a special note on the last chapter...that insane figure that Elsa comes up with for how much energy it took for her to freeze everything is based on calculations a physics student named Aaron Goldberg made to figure it out. To quote, 'This amount is equivalent to the energy released by the Hiroshima nuclear bomb 115 times over, or that released by 63 Nagasaki nuclear bombs. This immense number puts Elsa's power into perspective, implying either that the Snow Queen has enormous strength, or that Disney underestimated the ramifications of their animated fantasy.' Which is kind of 'yikes!' but crazy awesome.:) Just put "Elsa's powers physics" in the search engine and it should be the first or second result. It's very cool.:)**

 **Next chapter coming soon!**


	39. Chapter 39

**A/N: Thanks to everyone who's followed/favorited and/or is reading but not reviewing:)**

 **AvatarxFrozen-I think that makes a lot of sense, actually. I'm glad "my" Elsa is able to make you feel better.:) I feel like Elsa isn't really given the characterization she deserves in a LOT of fanfics, not because the authors are bad writers, but because they're misinterpreting her as a person. Which, of course, makes sense seeing as Elsa's canon self tries so hard to hide her emotions. I don't pretend to be any great writer, lol, but I do like to think "my" Elsa acts the way Elsa would if she were a real girl. Like Kai was trying to explain to Elsa herself last chapter, she's not "just" the powerful Snow Queen or "just" the vulnerable, sensitive girl that tends to get frightened or upset easily. She's both. Reducing her to just one or the other isn't fair to the character or ANYONE in real life that feels that way. (Just my opinion:)) Anyways, I'm so glad you like my story:)**

 **Elsa Tomago-Well, Elsa understands the idea of making sacrifices for the good of her country (as we will see very shortly!), but she knows the way Boris treated Kiara before and so she automatically got angry. I don't know what I would do, to be honest. Hence why we will be revisiting the "sacrificing one to save many" issue so we can see both sides. We'll be getting back to Anna's lists soon, but not in this chapter, actually (you'll see why:)) Yep, Elsa's ability to break out of things (and the fact that nobody, even Elsa, really knows how her powers work) is going to be important. Can't rely on technology!:P**

 **FluffyKitten-Boris doesn't care about Kiara, but he does genuinely think sacrificing one person is morally correct if it saves the rest of his country. Like I mentioned already, Elsa does understand that train of thought, but she also knows Boris doesn't care about Kiara. Also, I know we don't see him much, but Rapunzel's father is nice.:P He will show up next chapter.:) I think so, too-both Elsa and Anna need people like Gerda and Kai, especially Elsa. Lol, Elsa likes things to be logical, so she's just trying to make her magic logical, Yeah, Dark Elsa kind of made a huge mess...and left a very costly mistake for normal-Elsa to fix.**

 **Guest-Lol, they may not even get to carry out the plan...*dundundundun* :P I'm glad you like it-I feel like it's kind of a necessity in certain scenes.:) No matter what we saw in the movie, there is no way Elsa and her family/friends/etc are going to speak English when they are at home. Arendelle is based off real-life Arendal, Norway, so. Yeah.:) Also I would very much like to learn Norwegian and making the effort to look things up for storywriting purposes can't hurt.:P (And, since I "moved" Arendelle in my story-verse, I want to make it extra clear that it's still movie Arendelle.) There are a couple more hints in this chapter as to why Arendelle is where it is in my story-verse, too.:)**

 **On to the story!:)**

"You must reach the U.S. president directly somehow before attempting to rescue your friends, that's all, Miss Elsa," Kai said when Elsa had repeated to him everything Gerda had told her and the plan she and Meri had come up with. "I doubt he wants terrorists in his country's intelligence. You clear your disguise plan with him first, and then there is no problem with infiltrating that headquarters building." He frowned, thinking of the other issue at hand. "That doesn't fix potential damage your dark self caused, however. Producing dangerous winter conditions all over another country is definitely an act of aggression, even though we all know you didn't mean to. Have you at least attempted to thaw everything out?"

Elsa shook her head, her cheeks red in embarrassment. "I…I'd be worried I'd just make it worse since I have no idea exactly how much of a mess I made," she said softly. _Maybe Meri has a map and she could tell me how far-reaching the winter conditions are,_ Elsa thought.

"Then ask that Meri girl for a map," Kai said, mirroring Elsa's idea. "If she is genuinely helping, she will be willing to show you where your magic's effects are."

"Okay, I…I was just thinking the same thing," Elsa replied. _It must be at least a fairly good idea if more than one person thought of it._

"And if you do leave Arendelle, go to Corona and get those broken fingers healed before doing anything else," Kai added firmly. "You'll need to be at full power, Miss Elsa. There's one more thing…you _need_ to be prepared for the fact that there are probably at least a few injured innocents from whatever winter weather your magic caused," Kai added gently but sternly. "Please don't let their president walk all over you by throwing information like that in your face. Miss Elsa, you'll need to use both the innocent, frightened little girl act _and_ the powerful Snow Queen to pull everything off and keep the peace."

Elsa bit her lip and gave a bitter laugh. "I'm not so sure the innocent, frightened little girl is an act," she deadpanned, shaking her head. _I feel like I just want to run off to the North Mountain and hide for the rest of my life._

Kai looked her right in the eyes as he replied, "Well then, it'll be easy to pull her out when you need her."

"What do I do if I really did hurt a lot of innocent people?" Elsa asked hesitantly, unsure she wanted to hear the answer.

"I think you'll know if or when the time comes," Gerda said quickly. She was actually quite worried about that possibility-if Elsa really had hurt a bunch of innocent people that weren't even from (or in) her own country to boot, she would be perceived a danger and any legitimate foreign leader would probably want to have her put away. Add to that the fact that they all already knew the U.S. president wanted to run experiments on her to learn more about her magic (and that Elsa had previously agreed to participate as long as she had say in what said experiments were), and Gerda was very, very sure that Elsa herself was in danger, no matter how strong her magic was.

Elsa looked down at her lap and didn't reply. _I'm scared. And if I really did hurt innocent people, I shouldn't be allowed to run free…not that I can literally run anyways, but…_ "I don't want to be an experiment," she blurted suddenly, her arms wrapped around her middle hugging herself. "Is that…is that selfish?" Elsa felt Gerda's warm arms around her, and she instinctively scooted closer into Gerda's comforting embrace. _That U.S. president will want to lock me away and use me for his scientific experiments if I hurt some of his people. I know he will, I just know it._

"We don't even know if you really did hurt anyone, Miss Elsa," Gerda reminded her. "That is a legitimate fear if you _did_ hurt any innocents, but you're strong enough to simply refuse such treatment. You are not being selfish." She hugged Elsa protectively; no one was going to treat the girl that way if she could help it.

"Gerda, if…if it came to that, I won't fight back to save myself," Elsa whispered, her voice shaky but determined. _If I did, Arendelle would be in awful danger the second I die. I could protect it until then, but I'm not risking my country's sovereignty for my own freedom. Anna would make a fine queen if I were…not here._

Gerda pulled away and just gently took Elsa's face in her hands. She had heard something in Elsa's voice that she did not like one bit. "Miss Elsa, are you…suicidal again?" she asked quietly. _If she let herself be treated that way, she would die eventually. I just know it. They wouldn't keep her alive if they thought she was of no use anymore, either._

"She's not suicidal," Kai interjected without waiting for Elsa to reply. Even if Elsa began panicking again, Kai was very, very sure that she would not try such a thing, indirectly or no. He didn't a hundred percent trust her not to harm herself, but he did trust her not to attempt…that again. "Gerda, do give Miss Elsa a bit of credit. I believe she's just saying she's willing to sacrifice her freedom for the greater good if need be, that's all. Right, Miss Elsa?"

Elsa gave one slow nod but said nothing. _Kai trusts me on that? He shouldn't do that. I'm okay now, but still!_

Gerda huffed a bit and just hugged Elsa protectively close again. She smiled a bit as she felt Elsa relax and the cold aura around her fade. "I'll not have any remote risk that she might feel like that again. I do trust her, but the fact that she's felt that way before means that it can happen again, even though I don't think it will. I will _not_ let anything happen to Miss Elsa again," Gerda said firmly.

"I think…I think I don't need Papa to love me. I have you and Kai," came Elsa's quiet, contented voice a moment later.

* * *

Elsa slipped downstairs to the kitchen early the next morning, her peaceful feelings from her talk with Gerda and Kai the evening before still leaving her happy and calm. _And a bit more confident than usual, even without dark-me,_ she noted with satisfaction. She had also used Meri's map and information to thaw the winter mess her dark-self had caused as much as she could, too. "Gerda, I've been thinking about what you said yesterday-that maybe I could sort of walk without my brace now if someone helped me, and…a-and could you maybe help me try?" she asked hopefully. Elsa could still feel butterflies in her stomach at the idea, but they were the good kind of nervous, not the awful kind that made her feel sick and panic.

Gerda smiled and just took her by the hand. "Of course, Miss Elsa, but I should think your sister might want to be with you, you know."

"I want to try and make sure I can first," Elsa replied, frowning. _I don't want to disappoint her…_ Her face brightened as another idea popped into her head. "May I try in the ballroom? I don't know why I want to try there, but I just do," she added.

"Just try again, Miss Elsa," Gerda said gently a little while later. "And there's no shame in quitting for now and trying again later."

Elsa sighed and just closed her eyes. _I don't even know why I can't just all-out TRY. This is the third time I chickened out of attempting to step on it. Gerda won't let me fall, and even if I did fall, she wouldn't laugh at me or hurt me. She'd just help me up and say to try again another time if I wanted to._ She took a deep breath and clutched Gerda's arms tightly. _I can do this. I may not be able to actually do it, but I_ can _try._ "I'm trying this time. For sure."

Gerda said nothing and just let Elsa think and try at her own pace. She smiled as she watched Elsa awkwardly move her bad leg forward. "That's part of it, Miss Elsa. Now try to step on it," she said quietly. "I won't let you fall."

Elsa tried to shift her weight onto her bad leg, but then bit her lip and just pulled her foot back. "It…it feels funny. All shaky and just…just…I don't know," she muttered, half to herself and half to Gerda. _Elsa, just try. You aren't trapped anywhere and Gerda loves you. It's okay to not be perfect. Really._

 _It is? If Papa were here right now, he'd say there was something wrong with me and that I just needed to concentrate and voíla, everything would be fine._

 _That's nonsense. Nobody with a bad leg can walk perfectly on their own. Especially not if they're trying for the first time since they were hurt. There's nothing wrong with you._ Encouraged by her inner voice for once, Elsa tried again…and immediately slipped and would have fallen if Gerda hadn't been supporting her.

"Good leg first this time," Gerda suggested, not addressing the failed attempt.

Elsa nodded determinedly and tried again. She had been biting her lip almost hard enough to make it bleed, but when she _didn't_ slip again, a hesitant smile began spreading across her face. She could still feel her weak leg trembling badly under her, she was awfully slow, her steps were tiny, and she knew she was dragging her left leg behind her…but she was still _walking_. Elsa's blue eyes filled with happy tears even after she slipped again after a couple steps. She felt Gerda's warm arms wrapped around her and then a whispered _I knew you could do it_ and all semblance of composure disappeared for her.

Gerda just picked Elsa up and carried her over to the piano bench and sat down still holding her tightly. It hadn't mattered to her one bit whether Elsa could walk without her brace or not-Elsa was still just plain Elsa to her. No, Gerda was so happy because Elsa had been willing to _try_. If Elsa's leg never got any stronger than it was right this second, it wouldn't matter to Gerda because at least Elsa had been willing to try to do something for herself even though she had been scared to do so. "I'm proud of you, Miss Elsa. Not for what you were or were not able to do, but because you _tried_ ," Gerda said quietly.

Elsa sort of thought that was silly-she was _supposed_ to try, right? How was that something good enough that someone would be proud of her for it? "Why would you be proud of me just for trying?" she asked curiously. She didn't sound upset, just that she didn't understand.

Gerda sighed and hugged Elsa closer. "Because you are very, very rarely willing to try to do something that's just for you, that's why. I know you were a bit scared, and you tried anyway. That's why I'm proud of you, Miss Elsa," she explained.

"It…it wasn't just for me. I wanted to surprise Papa next time I see him," Elsa admitted softly. _Elsa, that's ridiculous. You know he won't really think that's a good surprise. He'll just say, 'Good, Elsa. Now you just need to figure out how to get rid of that limp.' Or something like that. In any event, it wouldn't be good enough. You should just try for yourself and that's it. And don't stupidly think it's going to be 'all better' eventually, because it's not. You're fine already._ Elsa was somehow confused that her usually awful self-deprecating inner voice wasn't automatically picking on herself; just a short while ago she knew her thoughts would have immediately jumped to calling herself stupid or something else similar. Her thoughts still weren't exactly _nice_ about herself, but they weren't quite so mean, either. At least not this time.

 _Oh, Elsa. I should have known…_ "Miss Elsa, at least that wasn't the only reason you wanted to try. If that was the only reason making you do it, you would have tried awhile ago," Gerda said firmly. Gerda frowned; the girl had hidden her face in Gerda's shoulder, much as she had done when she was little. She _knew_ Elsa was doing that for the same reason her little-girl self had done that, too, because Elsa was not crying. She just wanted to be held and hiding her face made her feel safe and loved. "I think you're perfect just the way you are, Miss Elsa," Gerda added.

Elsa felt a gentle kiss in her hair and just stayed absolutely still. _Gerda did that when I was little before the accident. She held me then and said those exact words, too. Gerda_ loves _me. She does not-and did not-have to do that. And…and I know she would have held me after the accident when I was stuck in my room too if I had let her._ She could actually remember right after the accident-right when they'd come back from the trolls-Gerda had refused to help move Elsa's things out of her and Anna's room. No, instead Gerda had carried her downstairs to her own room, stubbornly locked the door, and just held her. Gerda hadn't taken her back upstairs until she was outright ordered to do so, and then she had stayed right beside her when she'd begged to be allowed to see Anna one last time. _Gerda did as much as she dared to help me without losing her job. That's what she did._ Now that she was thinking about it, Elsa didn't understand how Gerda taking care of her hadn't been enough to make her (re)learn to control her powers. "Thank you for everything," she whispered.

Gerda smiled and gave Elsa one last squeeze before setting her down. "No thanks needed, Miss Elsa. Your birthday is in just over a week now, you know. Is there anything special that you would like to do?"

"I think we should focus on fixing the mess I caused first," Elsa said with a frown, "but I would very much like to have a picnic in the gardens. I ought to hold a big party since I ruined my coronation ball last year, but I really, really don't want to. I think I owe everyone that, though." _You can handle it now, Elsa. You won't like it, but you're not going to panic. You know that._

"Why not do both? Miss Elsa, I know you. You may not _like_ an event like that, but you can handle it. If you do start feeling overwhelmed, then leave the room for a few minutes and come back."

"What if I say something stupid? Or I _do_ panic?" Elsa asked softly. "What if I start thinking about what happened last summer and-"

"I highly, highly doubt that is going to happen," Gerda interrupted. "But even if it did, everyone already knows about your magic. If you make a little mistake here or there, no one will care. Queen or not, you're still human. And if you're worried about panicking, if you leave the room when you first start feeling that way, you'll be able to calm down. Even if you couldn't, you would be out of public view and it wouldn't matter anyway."

"But I'm supposed to be all better now." _No, you aren't, Elsa. Not going to happen. You know that._

"No, you are not, Miss Elsa, because issues like that don't just randomly heal like they were never there," Gerda told her gently. "You are 'supposed' to be learning how to deal with said issues in a healthy way-i.e., not letting them control you or trying to hide them-and that's exactly what you're doing. Let yourself heal inside at your own pace; don't beat yourself up about it. Anyone who matters will accept you just like you are, do you understand?"

Elsa didn't say anything, but she slowly nodded. She did understand. She just wished it wasn't true. _I'm okay. I have Anna and Gerda and Kai and everything. It doesn't matter._

* * *

Before lunch, Anna went to find Elsa, who was in her room writing out the invitations to the party she did not want to hold. Since Elsa had left her door half-open, Anna just knocked once and ran in without waiting for Elsa to reply. "Gerda gave me some assignment thing yesterday and she said I was supposed to share it with you. And just now she said you had a surprise for me!" Anna said excitedly. "Can I see the surprise now? _Pleeeaase?_ "

Elsa figuratively froze, which made a small ink blot on the invitation she was writing. _A surprise? I don't have any surprise for Anna…wait a minute. Gerda, why did you tell Anna that? Two steps wasn't much. I was happy, but…_ "Anna, you made me ruin this invitation," she said finally.

"Does the invitation have to do with the surprise?" Anna pulled up a chair and plopped down next to Elsa; then pushed her own list assignment she'd done towards Elsa. "And can I see your list thingie?"

Elsa did pull out her own list she had made, but she didn't say anything for a minute. She could just say that the stupid invitations for the stupid party were indeed the surprise-Anna would probably be excited for that. _Anna would know that wasn't it, and anyways I don't want to lie to her._ "I…I…I'll try to show you." Elsa could feel her hands shaking as she slowly unfastened her brace and then pulled herself to her feet. _I have to do it right the first time. Don't chicken out, Elsa. Just…don't._

Anna grinned and clapped her hands, suddenly very sure what Elsa's 'surprise' was. "Gerda helped you learn to walk by yourself? How'd you keep it a secret? And-"

Elsa scrunched her eyes shut; she could feel her cheeks turning pink in embarrassment. _Just tell her the truth, Elsa. Anna won't leave. You know that. She might be disappointed for a moment, but she won't care._ "Anna. Anna, I…that's not… I still…I still need…"

 _But…but she thinks I can_ by myself _. And I can't!_ Elsa kept her eyes closed as she tried to do the same thing Gerda had helped her do downstairs earlier. She would try on her own for Anna. Anna's excited chattering was just making her more nervous, and she suddenly felt terrified. Anna wouldn't hurt her or leave her all alone, but she _would_ be disappointed. That was almost worse to Elsa's racing thoughts.

The next thing either of them knew Elsa was on the floor in tears. Anna just wrapped her arms around the older girl and hugged her tightly. "Oh, Elsa, don't cry," Anna begged, realizing what must have happened. _She still needed help, and she tried anyway because I didn't stop talking and she didn't want to 'disappoint me'. I know that's what it is._ "You _can_ walk without your brace, but you still need help. Right?"

"I…it took several tries to make just a couple steps, a-and Gerda had to help me," Elsa mumbled. "I just…I didn't want to tell you. You were so happy, and…and I just wanted to surprise you, and-"

"And it's all right, Elsa," Anna interrupted quickly. "I'm not disappointed. Well, maybe a teeny bit, but that's my fault. You tried to tell me and I didn't stop talking." She smiled a bit; Elsa was still cooler than she was when she was happy, but she wasn't crying anymore. "D'you want to show me the real surprise anyways?"

Elsa nodded and let Anna help her to her feet again. "But it's not a very good surprise," she warned, even though she had been happy with what she'd been able to do earlier.

Anna pooh-poohed this and just gave Elsa an expectant smile. "Well? If the surprise isn't you squishing my arm to death, are you gonna show me?" she teased.

"I'm sorry," was Elsa's instant reply, but she didn't loosen her grip on Anna's arm. She frowned, realizing Anna was _not_ supporting her like Gerda had done. _Anna thinks I can do more than I really can, I just know it. Elsa, tell her the complete truth. She won't mind._ "Anna, I can't do it by myself. I _am_ nervous, but even if I wasn't, I still need quite a bit of help," she blurted all in one breath.

"That's ok," Anna said quickly. "I can help. I won't let you fall." She wasn't sure exactly Elsa wanted her to do, so she just held Elsa's arms herself. Anna made a face but didn't say anything else. _Elsa's scared. She's…still…scared. I want Elsa to be happy just like she is._ "Elsa, why are you scared?" she asked quietly. "There's nothing to be scared of. I'm not going to hurt you or pick on you. Promise."

 _But you'll be disappointed if I mess up,_ Elsa thought, her eyes screwed tightly shut. _Elsa, come on, snap out of it. Anna will just have to deal with it. There's nothing wrong with you. You know that._ Elsa managed to take two slow, tiny steps before slipping almost exactly like she had earlier.

And true to her word, Anna did not let her fall; she easily caught her. "That was two steps, and you said you did two earlier," Anna pointed out. "I think maybe we need to figure out what's making you slip, that's all."

Elsa actually had an answer for that. "It's my ankle-I'm so wobbly it just goes right out from under me, that's all. It's still all floppy and I can't make it stay straight," she explained. "My knee isn't strong enough to support me, either. That's why I need help."

"But you can move your bad leg by yourself now," Anna pointed out. "Which means it's gotten at least a little bit stronger. Can you bend and straighten your knee by yourself?"

"I can, but it's still hard."

"What about your foot? Can you move it and flex and point it?" Anna asked.

"Not very well," Elsa said truthfully. "And it's just…really hard. Like I have to concentrate on it and really think about it."

Anna bit her lip. _So Elsa's leg_ is _quite a bit better, but she still needs more support than just me or Gerda helping her._ "What if you let Dr. Raske look at it? Maybe there's something he can make or have made for you or you could make with your magic that would help," she suggested.

"I'd rather just let Gerda help me. Dr. Raske is nice, but…I don't know…" Elsa wasn't sure how to explain herself; she knew Dr. Raske wouldn't hurt her and that he always took the best care of her or anyone else that he could, but she felt far more comfortable around Gerda all the same.

"Would you let me go talk to him myself?" Anna offered. "You don't have to. Promise."

Elsa hesitated, but nodded after a moment. That would be fine. "I have another sort-of surprise, too, Anna," she said just to change the subject. Elsa handed Anna the smudged party invitation, figuring she couldn't give that one away anyhow. When Anna didn't say anything, Elsa frowned. "I thought you'd be delighted. You love big parties, even if I don't."

"That's just it, Elsa. You _hate_ big parties! So…why?" Anna couldn't understand why Elsa, who hated being the center of attention and didn't like big party-dance things anyway, would voluntarily plan some big social event she was probably really nervous about attending, considering she was the queen and could do as she pleased. "I mean, this sounds like fun to me, but not for you. You're supposed to do something YOU want to do on your birthday. Does this have anything to do with me, by any chance?"

"Well…" Elsa flopped down on her bed and propped herself up on her elbows, not particularly caring that that wasn't very proper in the least. "Not entirely-I mean, I did know you would like it, but it's mostly purely because I pretty much ruined my coronation party last year, and I thought that was the least I could do for all the people. That's all."

"Why'd you put the bit that suggests the guests wear traditional dress?" Anna asked curiously. "I don't even own one, and Mom and Dad never did either that I can remember."

"Because I want us to celebrate our country, not my birthday," Elsa explained happily. She blushed as she added, "Besides, selfishly it'll help take the focus off me. People love talking about their clothes and I'd hope _most_ of our citizens are proud of our country's history." Elsa paused before continuing, "And I really, really would like to visit Europe someday. I want to know exactly how our ancestors got here, considering that map Meri showed me last night. There is a big hole in our history, and I want to know what's missing and why!"

"I think," Anna ventured after a minute's thought, "that it has to do with Ingrid. She must have destroyed all our official records about certain things. I'll bet there are clues in those old ice pane diary things."

"You think our ancestors came here from Norway forever ago via some kind of magic?" Elsa asked in surprise. "We've had no contact with any country in Europe to my knowledge in…" She trailed off, remembering a question she had asked her father when she was eleven or so. She'd asked why _all_ of their allies were near neighbors and why there were none overseas in Europe, and her daddy had said something to the effect of 'if it ain't broke, don't fix it' and that they hadn't had any contact with Europe at all in over a century. "Since Ingrid was alive, most likely," she finished in a whisper. _Maybe Anna's idea isn't so crazy after all…_

"Elsa, I think at one time there were more natural mages like you and Rapunzel," Anna said slowly. "Do you remember what Jade said when she used the dracokinesis crystal to control Linnae? That she thought all the dragons were extinct? Dragons _fly_. That's how our ancestors got here, Elsa. Pet dragons."

"We don't live in a fairy tale! Or the _Edda_!" Elsa protested.

"Says the girl who has ice powers that can freeze most of a continent!" Anna shot back. She paused and scowled. "Yeesh, Elsa, did you really read _all_ of both those books?! I tried and gave up-they're really hard."

Elsa giggled at that and sat up. "Yes, I did. I probably can't read all of it now-my Old Norse is pretty rusty. You liked fairy tales, remember? Well, those were _my_ 'fairy tales'. I thought those myths were really interesting. I had a children's version of Norse myths when we were really little, remember?"

"Yeah, you wanted to dress up as Ska∂i one time," Anna remembered, sitting down next to Elsa. "And you wanted a valkyrie costume too. Did you ever get it?" _Why did I ask her that? I know she didn't before the accident, and I'm sure she didn't after…_

But Elsa smiled and nodded. "Gerda knew I wanted one, and she made one for me. Do you remember shoving a note you dictated to Gerda under my door the first Christmas after the accident?"

"Sort of, but what's that got to do with anything?"

"Well, a few minutes after you gave me that, Gerda came in with breakfast and she had brought me a present," Elsa explained, her blue eyes slightly wet with tears at the memory. "I'm sure you can guess what was in it. I remember she told me that she couldn't do anything to fix the situation, but that she would do everything she could to make me happy. She told me she wanted me to feel like I could be anything I wanted to be, even if it was some mythical being that didn't exist." Elsa looked down at her hands and bit her lip. "I dressed up in that costume all the time when I didn't have lessons to do. I pretended you were an epic warrior fallen in battle and I was taking you to Valhalla. Because if you were already dead then…then my magic c-couldn't hurt you." _That doesn't even make sense. What was little-me even thinking?_

Anna wrapped her arms around Elsa and just hugged her as tightly as she could. "Oh, Elsa, you're _crazy_ , you know that? How did you even play a game like that all by yourself?" she asked. _Elsa did that when she was nine. She was just a little kid._

"My imagination, same as before the accident," Elsa replied, her voice strained. "You playacted by yourself, didn't you? You ran around in that silly kraken costume you had quite a bit. You used to chase Gerda and Kai around in the hall. And one time you fell and got awful, awful carpet burn. I heard you."

"Yeah, but…" Anna wasn't quite sure what to say. Picturing little nine-year-old Elsa trying her best to play by herself when she was terrified of hurting others made Anna horribly upset. Somehow that was almost worse than picturing Elsa doing her lessons by herself. It made Anna's mental picture of little Elsa closer to that of a normal little girl and not some mini adult or something. Elsa had been playacting by herself, and she had imagined her baby sister to be there in a way that allowed her to be safe even though Elsa couldn't control her magic then. _And Elsa heard me out in the hall and_ knew what I was doing _?! And wearing, for that matter?_ "Do you still have your valkyrie outfit?" Anna asked curiously.

Elsa tensed up, and the temperature in the room dropped a few degrees. She slowly shook her head, but said nothing.

"What happened to it?"

"I froze it by accident. And ruined it. Papa wouldn't let Gerda make me another one," Elsa said quietly. She suddenly jerked away and sat up straight when she heard strange loud noises outside that she couldn't quite place. "Something's wrong. I don't know what it is, but…something's not right." Elsa quickly fastened her brace back on her leg and went to peek out the window. _What are all of those people doing?! Those ships don't look like anything I've ever s-_

 _You know where they're from then, Elsa. Go out there and fix everything. Meri's information wasn't wrong, but her timing was._ Elsa screamed and jumped away from the window when she saw one of her own guards fall. A small explosive thing had gone off right in the courtyard. Because Elsa had protected the castle with her ice, the castle wall wasn't damaged, but Elsa didn't want any more of her people to be hurt. "Anna, I want you to find Nikoleta and get her to help you get the little ones into the cellar," Elsa said quickly as she put up an opaque ice wall between her and Anna and quickly slipped off her original ice-dress and replaced it with her ice-armor and a copy of her white knee-length ice-dress with the silvery crystal straps. Then she took the ice wall down. "Okay, that's done," she muttered. Before heading out of her room, she turned back to Anna and said, "I need you to do exactly as I say, Anna. Not because I'm being bossy but because I have to keep the greatest number of people safe. Do you understand?"

"Yeah, but-"

"No buts," Elsa interrupted sharply. "Either you listen to me- _explicitly-_ or I'll have to shut you in the cellar with the others. I could really use your help."

Anna hesitated but nodded. "I understand, Elsa."

"Even if what I have to do puts me in danger," Elsa added quietly, forcing herself to remain calm. _I can do whatever I have to do. I love my country. So there._ "I'll do my best not to do that, but if it comes down to it…" her voice trailed off.

Anna hugged Elsa close as she gave Elsa her answer. For once she understood what Elsa meant. "Yes. But I _will_ come rescue you if something awful happens. I promise that, too." _I will not let anything horrible happen to Elsa. I won't._

"All right then. After you have taken everyone to the cellar, I want you to go to the stables with Olaf and hide in the loft. Kai will meet you there and tell you what to do next. Got it?"

"Got it." Anna impulsively hugged Elsa close, not wanting to let her go. "I love you, Elsa."

* * *

Once she was downstairs, Elsa quickly found both Kai and Gerda and told them what she wanted them to do. "Kai, I want you to collect all of the servants and get them to the cellar. If the cellar gets too full, take the others down to the dungeon hallway and have them stay there. Those are the two safest areas of the castle. Make sure they all know they aren't in trouble, just that there's danger and we're taking precautions. Then go out to the stables and find Anna. She'll be in the loft. I want you and Anna to get all the citizens in their homes and in their cellars if they have them." Elsa took a deep breath and turned to Gerda. "Gerda, I want you to get Dr. Raske and come with me. I have no doubts that there are already people injured. You and Dr. Raske will take care of them."

"No need to get me, I'm right here, my queen," Dr. Raske said as he speed-walked up to her. "Got supplies in hand, too."

Elsa nodded. "Thank you. All right, let's go."

Elsa actually went off on her own the second they were outside the castle walls, knowing the others would try to protect her if something bad happened. _Elsa, keep it together. Don't do anything stupid. You have to pull out the powerful Snow Queen right now without letting your dark side do anything bad._ Before doing anything else, she encased the entire castle inside a bubble of impenetrable ice. At least everyone and everything inside the castle would be safe. There were about a dozen soldiers less than five yards away from her, and she froze all of them in place before they could do anything else. Then she headed toward the fjord, her magic somehow making her feel stronger. _You can totally do this, Elsa. You just stopped a dozen armed men in one go without any trouble at all._

 _And…my magic is actually cooperating right now and doing bigger things in one motion because I'm not terrified,_ Elsa realized, the thought spurring her onward. Whoever was in charge would probably be on the largest weird metal ship. That _should_ be the flagship, right? Elsa felt scared that she wouldn't be able to protect all of her people, but somehow she was no longer scared for herself. She would be fine because Anna would find a way to help her if she was in trouble. Of that she had no doubt whatsoever.

When she was greeted at the dock in her own language, Elsa made another quick decision. If this military leader person thought she couldn't speak English much, she would be able to overhear conversations she might not get to hear otherwise because they would assume she didn't understand. Therefore she would only speak to him in Norwegian. _Don't mess this up, Elsa. Don't._ The man's Norwegian was rough and it made it difficult for Elsa to understand him, so she had to think for a moment before replying. "Dette synes knapt å være en vennlig visitt," she replied flatly, sensing rather than seeing that most of the foreign soldiers had formed a semicircle around and behind her, blocking her in. _I could still get away,_ she reminded herself. Elsa remembered what that serum had made her do, and she quickly created a helmet to protect her head and neck. Now only her face and her good hand remained uncovered by ice; the rest of her was protected by impenetrable ice-armor.

"Bring her aboard the ship," the man said in English, assuming Elsa didn't understand.

Elsa didn't react, but she also didn't budge. "Hva vil du med meg?" she asked, hoping that her I-don't-understand-English bluff would pass undetected. If this man couldn't understand enough of her language to give her the explanation, she might be walking into a trap _and_ not be protecting her people. Her main worry was that her own country's civilians would be in danger and she wouldn't be able to defend them. No matter how strong her magic might be, Elsa knew she wasn't proficient enough to fight in multiple places at the same time with precision. She could protect everyone within her view, but that was more or less it. She also didn't want innocent people's homes or business damaged, either. _If I can get this man and his soldiers to take me to the president, that would help. Then I'll know exactly how much damage my dark-self caused and I'll be able to know what I need to do to rectify it._

"Du... kommer... amerikanere alle forlate. Løfte," the man said.

Elsa hesitated. She needed proof, and she was determined not to be tricked into cooperating on anything if her people wouldn't be safe. Maybe it had to do with damage her magic had caused. "Jeg trenger bevis. Jeg ikke vil samarbeide hvis mitt folk ikke er forlatt alene. Dette har å gjøre med skader min magic?" When the man just stared at her and didn't reply, she knew he probably hadn't understood everything she'd said. _What am I supposed to do?_

"She wants to know if it has to do with her magic," one of the soldiers behind Elsa said.

* * *

After a few minutes more of awkward exchanges, Elsa had kept up her ruse of pretending not to understand their English, and she knew exactly what was going on, too. These weren't the bad terrorist people, but they didn't like her. But at least she could tell that they genuinely did not wish to cause Arendelle harm. They merely wanted to get her out of the way. Because Elsa did indeed understand every word the American soldiers were saying, she realized that she had indeed hurt people when she'd been under the influence of that serum. Frozen trees had fallen on cars with people inside them; multiple people had slipped and fallen on ice. The only good thing was that according to everything she'd heard, no one had actually died. That was good anyways. _If you hadn't hurt anyone, would you have handed yourself over so easily? Even though you were protecting Arendelle by doing so?_ Elsa's inner voice asked. No, she wouldn't have. She just knew it.

Now she was locked in a too-bright whitewashed room in the weird battleship. She wordlessly dissolved her armor when the man escorting her told her to do so, but she refused to hand over her brace. "Nei," was all Elsa said, shaking her head firmly. She clutched the small snowflake pendant hanging around her neck in her good hand tightly, trying to remind herself of the words etched on it. _No fear. Love=freedom._ Elsa frowned in confusion when she felt something metal fastened around her arm. How was that going to keep her from using her magic? That was ridiculously stupid in her mind. Just as an experiment, she let a bit of frost form in her bad hand and just forced herself to ignore her broken fingers throbbing in protest. Nothing weird happened despite the odd metal wristband, and Elsa had to hide a very relieved smile. _Elsa, just let them think the thing works. Don't you dare admit that it does absolutely nothing._

The man frowned at Elsa's left hand, wondering how she had gotten hurt. And…why wasn't Elsa making a fuss? She didn't appear frightened or angry, either. She was weirdly calm and composed. She did not try to leave the room, either. Nor did she say anything. _I don't know what she is or where she came from, but she didn't make all that winter weather to hurt people on purpose. She's no monster creature like that thing she made._

Elsa went over to the funny dial switch for the light and dimmed the room to the way the castle was usually lit the second she was left alone. Then she curled up on the cot in the corner and tried not to cry as the enormity of exactly what she had done settled on her. She didn't regret her decision-this was fair, she had hurt innocent people that weren't even from her country and that would make anyone want to put her away-but forced isolation reminded her of what had happened after the accident. _It took thirteen years for Anna to rescue me,_ Elsa thought suddenly. She could feel herself shaking all over now at the idea that she might be locked away somewhere for that long again. _Elsa, get yourself together. Anna promised she would find a way to get you back if something happened, remember? You can't break down. You can't. Don't disappoint your family. They'd want you to be strong even if you didn't feel like it. Even Papa._

* * *

ARENDELLE…

"Kai, I've got to get Elsa back! I knew I shouldn't have promised to listen to her!" Anna shouted desperately that evening. "They might be hurting her or something, and she'll be scared and there won't be anyone there for her!"

"Princess Anna. Listen to me," Kai said firmly. "I don't know exactly what your sister said or agreed to, but she's the queen. That means she must, at all cost, protect her country to the best of her ability. Whatever she did got all of them to leave. _All_ of them. We're lucky only one guard is hurt and that one market stall burned down. Your sister got everything under control as best she could on short notice like that. We had no defenses set up to fight back beyond our normal guards. She allowed herself to be captured to protect the rest of us."

"She could have fought back! Elsa's dark-self froze most of their stupid country!" Anna protested. "Why couldn't she have just squished their stupid ugly battleships with her magic or something?"

"Because, Miss Anna, she hates hurting people and, in any event, she could not take on as many soldiers as there were at once, not because her magic isn't strong enough, but because she's human and can only be in a single place at any one time. It wasn't like they were all out on the fjord-they'd already gotten a ways into Arendelle itself. She could probably fight battles remotely, yes, but you know as well as I do that she doesn't know how," Kai said quietly. "Those were not terrorists, you know. They were probably sent here to get her out of the way because she's perceived as dangerous at this point because of what her dark side did. To some extent we have nothing to stand on to convince them to release her."

Anna's blue-green eyes filled with tears as she balled her hands into fists at her sides. "That wasn't Elsa's fault! It wasn't! If anything it was their fault for not getting those bad terrorist people out of their government in the first place!"

"It was not your sister's fault, no, but she still has to deal with the consequences." Kai sighed. "Let me think. We have to be delicate about this-we don't want to start a war or something. We don't want that."

"I'd start a war if it meant we got Elsa back," Anna muttered. All Anna could think of was how terrified Elsa had been at the idea of being locked away and treated like an experiment. Now Elsa had voluntarily handed herself over to the same people that would want to do that do her. What if someone was hurting Elsa right this second? Anna didn't even know where her sister was. _Elsa has tried so hard to 'get better' and now this happens. What if she's all frightened and upset again when we find her? That's not fair!_ The only thing Anna was grateful for was the fact that she knew Elsa's life was not in danger.

"Princess Anna, listen to me. Without Miss Elsa here, we don't have enough resources to fight against them, and you know it as well as I do. She's trying to keep peace between everyone and not cause trouble. They may realize that she poses no threat and release her voluntarily. I don't think their genuine government-I don't mean the terrorists-really wants to hurt her," Kai said slowly. He shook his head. "What your sister did was brave, but all's for naught if she doesn't stay in control. All we can do is pray she stays strong."

"Let's contact Mom and Dad and Uncle Thomas and Aunt Primrose. Surely one of them has an idea."

* * *

On the ship, Elsa was actually grateful that she was left alone most of the time. She knew there were two soldiers standing guard outside 'her' room at all times, but they didn't bother her much. The only thing was that she had absolutely nothing to do, and, with nothing to do, her thoughts kept turning to the worst scenarios possible. She was tempted to ask for a book to read, but the book would probably be in English and then that would give her secret away. _Just ask for drawing paper and a pen or pencil, Elsa. Then you can draw pictures or blueprints, whatever you like._

She was also scared of going to sleep, because if she had a bad dream and made any power mistakes, then they would know the bands they had put on her arms didn't work, and she didn't want that. Part of her was terrified of being chained somewhere or otherwise treated badly. So far she was being treated as some kind of important prisoner or specimen or something, and she wanted to keep it that way. The next time someone brought her a meal, Elsa asked for the paper and a writing utensil. This request was quickly obliged, and Elsa settled herself on the cot with the lap desk she'd been given and began drawing different intricate snowflake designs.

* * *

When Elsa finally fell asleep from pure exhaustion over a whole day later, and woke up some time after (she didn't know how much time had passed), she found herself in a completely different room, and she nearly panicked. _How long was I out?! And I'm not on that ship anymore-I can feel it._

"It's awake," Elsa heard a female voice say, and she tensed up all over. The voice didn't sound mean, but whoever it was sounded like they were talking about some alien creature or animal or something. _It? I'm not an it. Where am I? What's going on? Calm down, Elsa. Stop it. Now._ She was even more perturbed when the owner of the voice walked in and didn't address her at all, even rudely. Somehow that was more unnerving to Elsa than if the person had hit her or yelled at her. Elsa yelped in protest when the woman took her arm. She didn't want any weird things poking her. _Elsa, just cooperate. A blood test won't hurt you. You know that. And they can't recreate your powers in someone else using your blood, either. So don't worry about it. No big deal._

"I know you know English," the woman said suddenly, making Elsa jump. "You speak it fluently. The president told me. What are you?"

Elsa's eyes clouded over, but she did not cry. She didn't answer and just looked down at her lap. _I'm just a human girl that was born with magic. That's all. And I want to go home. Please let me go home._

"Some of the others _will_ hurt you if you don't cooperate," the woman warned.

 _I am cooperating. I could freeze my way out of here right this second. But I don't want to hurt anyone. I just want to keep Arendelle safe._

"Can you walk at all without that?" the woman asked, gesturing at Elsa's braced leg.

 _No._ Elsa shook her head, but she still said nothing aloud. _Well, I can walk two steps without it if someone's helping me,_ she thought, but she did not share that information. Elsa watched the woman write something down on her clipboard thing and just sat still. So this person would not hurt her if she made a fuss, but there were others here that would. She was surprised at the dismissive way she was being spoken to-didn't this woman and her coworkers know she could literally freeze them solid if she wanted to?-but then she remembered that no one knew she still had full access to her magic. _They think those weird wristbands control my powers,_ Elsa reminded herself. _So they also think I can't do anything at this point even if I wanted to._ The bands felt itchy and uncomfortable to her, but they didn't hurt.

"Are you going to say anything?"

Elsa met the woman's eyes steadily. _Don't you dare do anything stupid, Elsa. You can say something in your own defense, but that's it._ "Are you going to treat me like a human?" she responded, matching the woman's tone exactly. Elsa just contined staring at her until the woman looked away uncomfortably. "I wish to speak to your president, please," Elsa added politely.

"You don't have any right to request that at this point. He's a busy man."

Elsa felt her magic tingling angrily in her fingertips and balled her good hand into a fist. _I cannot lose control. At all. Not even a tiny bit. Right now would be a good time to 'conceal, don't feel', Elsa._ Although she didn't have any intentions of fighting back in her own defense, the fact that she had the ability to do so somehow made her feel more at ease. She couldn't risk losing that. Right now she didn't feel all terrified and upset like she'd felt when Jade had trapped her in that cave. _I feel scared, sure, but I'm actually okay,_ Elsa thought in surprise.

* * *

BACK IN ARENDELLE…

"Even the terrorists won't kill her, Princess Anna," Meri said firmly the next day. "Because they all need her. She's got something they want."

Anna waved her hand dismissively. "I don't care about stupid protocol title stuff. Just call me Anna. I've got to have your help. Elsa's probably all scared and I have to help her!"

Kiara, who was sitting in the library at Anna's not-planned-properly meeting, smirked and crossed her arms. "You really think so? While we were hiding out in the cellar, Meri told me Elsa broke out of some weird fancy device. She can rescue herself if she chooses to, I'll bet!"

Gerda frowned at Kiara and shook her head. "That's the problem here. Miss Elsa _let_ herself be captured-nobody kidnapped her. She's not going to fight back to free herself no matter whether she can or not, simply because she knows as long as they have her, they will not bother us," she said quietly.

"There is also the issue that right now, there's a very real reason why they can argue that Arendelle owes them somehow," Kai added. "We don't have the money to pay for all of the mess Miss Elsa's dark self caused in their country. It's too big; it'd ruin us financially. You could probably fit a hundred plus Arendelles in the United States. And Miss Elsa knows that as well. This was an economical and political move, too. She knows she's leaving someone she trusts in charge," he said, gesturing at Anna. "I think she may have been able to use brute force to get them to leave Arendelle alone, but then there would be a grudge there and Arendelle would be in danger the second she's…gone."

Nikoleta made a face. "But those bad terrorist people's serum stuff made her do it!"

"It doesn't matter. It's the huge scale of her magic. To a people that previously didn't believe magic even existed, it's even worse. What Miss Elsa chose to do was the best thing for Arendelle as a whole. She did what she had to do," Kai explained, shaking his head.

Anna still looked like she was about to cry and explode at the same time. "We can't just abandon my big sister," she announced with all the authority she could muster. "It's not fair! She didn't do anything wrong!"

"They'll probably all get sick of her eventually and let her go," Meri said, which was not at all helpful. This whole meeting conversation thing was rather frustrating to her because she did not understand Norwegian or Danish and she hated how easily both Anna and Kiara would switch back and forth between their own languages and English. Meri knew Scottish Gaelic, but that was not helpful here. And Anna had the odd knack of being able to match native accents too, which was all the more irritating. _Elsa spoke fluent English to me, but she had an accent. Anna doesn't even have that! Where'd she learn to do that anyways?_

"Yeah, and by then _somebody_ will have hurt Elsa something awful!" Anna shot back. "She'll think we all abandoned her and she'll be all upset. I'm NOT letting that happen! And…and I miss her already," she finished in a quieter tone. _Elsa would say I can't risk our safety by going myself or letting anyone in the library go right now,_ Anna thought.

"I'll bet my brother would help," Kiara suggested. "I know Elsa doesn't like him, but his sentence is up in a day or two anyway, I don't remember which, and I'll bet he'd do it. And he's _really_ good at fake-charming people, too."

Anna scowled. _Don't I know it._ "I don't want that stupid Hans near my sister, especially when there's a big chance that she's hurt. So there."

"Maybe everyone that can speak English without an accent could go," Nikoleta suggested. "That counts most of us out, but…I don't know…"

Four pairs of eyes swiveled towards Anna. Meri crossed her arms and waited for someone to translate whatever Nikoleta had said. (Kai did.) Anna just pointed at herself in confusion. "I thought the whole point was that Elsa wanted me here!" she exclaimed, but she was smiling. She loved the idea that she would get to help get Elsa back.

Kai nodded. "True, but you can pass _very_ easily. You match native accents like no one else can. You can also blend in, unlike your sister. Nobody would ask questions at all. You and Meri" (Meri looked up, recognizing her name) "can go. You can be on vacation or something." Kai translated what he'd just said for Meri.

Meri shook her head. "Two girls won't be able to get a meeting with the president. We gotta have Anna's parents or aunt and uncle or we'll get all the way to D.C. for nothing."

Anna rubbed her forehead; she felt like she was getting a headache. _That means we have to wait for Kristoff to get back from Corona and Weselton. He went and got that crystal from the trolls, but he'll have to wait for it to recharge, and…ugh. Now what? This also means there's nothing we can do in the meantime while who knows what is happening to Elsa._ "All right. Whatever's guaranteed for us to get Elsa back."

 **A/N: All right. So. That happened. Hopefully I made it clear why Elsa did what she did. Yes, she IS powerful enough to simply use brute force to keep Arendelle safe. No, she was not too frightened to attempt it, either. She's thinking of her country's future, not the 'here and now'. And she feels a bit guilty about what her dark-self did, too.:/**

 **As for the wristbands Elsa has at the moment, they don't work because her magic can't be "turned off" or suppressed. It's not really electrically based like Meri thought at all-it naturally puts out electrical energy, but it's still magic and doesn't obey all scientific rules...as Elsa knows and is confused by (like her "if I have that much magic inside me, why don't I explode?" comment.). :) This will work to Elsa's advantage next chapter.:)**

 **I'm sure some of you are probably disappointed that Elsa still can't really walk on her own without her brace, but she's trying, and I don't find it realistic that she would be able to automatically the first time she tries.**

 **It is realistic that Elsa would have access to both books of the _Edda_ -according to the articles I've read, they were written in the 13th century.:)**

 **For anyone surprised that Elsa hasn't completely panicked at her current situation, she knows she still has access to her magic even if no one else knows that. This makes her feel like she's choosing to remain where she is rather than being forced to do so. It's not like when Jade trapped her and Anna in that cave and she literally couldn't do anything about it. Also she's simply stronger inside now.:)**

 **Next chapter coming soon!:)**

 **P.S. I've made a new-ish blog and I'd be delighted if you checked it out! . com (Without the spaces, obviously:))**


	40. Chapter 40

**A/N: Thanks to everyone who's followed/favorited and/or is reading but not reviewing:)**

 **Olivia O'Neil, and Elsa Tomago-I replied to you via PM, so I won't make you reread the same thing here:)**

 **FluffyKitten-Elsa did need that.:) I think deep inside she's probably known that for a long while, but she just didn't (doesn't) want to accept it. She loves her father very much and just wants him to love her the way he does Anna. No, you made perfectly good sense.:) I mean, Elsa IS perfectly fine; she's just trying and can't and that's that. As long as Anna and Gerda and the others don't treat her like she's 'different' or something, Elsa won't care, either.:) Yes, HTTYD reference! Dragons do (or rather, _did_ ) exist in my story-verse, so yes, the two movie canons are linked in my head, along with a personal original fiction character who has no bearing on my Frozen series, haha.:P Wait and see about stupid Hans; no promises other than Elsa will NEVER EVER be paired with him since I hate that pairing.:) And yes, no one knows Elsa technically has the upper hand, all the more because she's convinced everyone she's powerless at the moment when that's completely untrue.**

 **DodgersGirl-Thank you!:) I think the site stripped the link.:/**

 **IndyGirl89-Well, Elsa's going to need help, but yes, she's going to be fine.:) (And okay, thanks for telling me! I thought the guest might have been you, but I wasn't sure.:P)**

 **On to the story!:)**

WESELTON

"I'll not put up with hearing you talk about Elsa like that," Kristoff said firmly. "I get that it was freaky that you had a random winter storm, but it wasn't her fault, I'm telling you. She thawed everything out, I see, too." This was true; the only signs that Weselton had been snowed in a short time ago was the squishy ground and a few spots of slushy snow. Kristoff thought Elsa had done a terrific job thawing everything considering she'd been trying to do so from a long ways away.

"What exactly do you want me to do?" Agdar asked.

"Anna sent me here. She wants you to help get Elsa released, like I said already," Kristoff repeated for what seemed to be the umpteenth time.

"Did Anna also tell you that what Elsa did was a political decision?" Agdar asked in a gentler tone. "She was fulfilling her duty."

Kristoff shrugged. "I don't care about politics. All I know is someone I care about is being held unfairly. That American girl Meri helped Elsa thaw the mess she made there by using a map, so Elsa has 'fulfilled' whatever duty she had. In my mind those terrorists should have been stopped by their government, so it's their own fault Dark Elsa caused such a ruckus. Not Arendelle's. If those United States people are so freaked out by magic, they're doing the same stupid stuff you did to Elsa when she was a kid. _You_ were scared of her, and you still are, too. How come you treated her like crap anyways?"

Agdar sighed deeply, knowing Kristoff was right. "Kristoff, that's just it. Elsa is my own daughter and nobody could convince me what I was doing to her was wrong. What makes you think any of us can convince them to release Elsa now?"

"That's not the point! They want to use her as some alien experiment to get magic-based weapons! Both the terrorists and the genuine government whatever thing. Don't you understand? Elsa will be hurt. She's had enough of that for ten lifetimes as far as I'm concerned!" Kristoff rarely got angry, but right now he wished it were proper to smack some sense into Elsa's father. He seemed to care, but he thought it was pointless to do anything.

Pause.

"They don't think she's human," Kristoff added. "Don't you want to at least try? How do you think Elsa will feel if we all abandon her? Elsa's birthday is in a few days. I for one don't want her to spend her birthday locked up in some lab."

"Why would they not think she's human?! What does she look like, a monkey? That is the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard of! She's just a girl that has weird magical powers, thank you very much!" Now Agdar looked angry.

"Will you help then?" Kristoff asked, refusing to get his hopes up.

"I most certainly will!" Agdar paused before adding thoughtfully, "I think Idun should be the one to go with you, though. She can be very convincing, and…and I think she would be more help for Elsa. I'll go tell her." _Idun could probably convince everyone that it's a great idea to let Elsa come home. I'd probably make it worse, if I am being honest with myself…_

* * *

PHILADELPHIA

"She wants a meeting with the president."

"Tough break. I can't have her finding out what-this is, he's too busy to bother with this."

"Finding out what? She's not stupid, human or not. I think she is more than important enough to have a meeting. It's not like she's making a fuss otherwise."

"Never mind. I'll deal with it myself."

* * *

CORONA

When Kristoff arrived in Corona, he found an absolute mess. "What's going on here?" Kristoff asked in confusion when he spoke to Thomas and Primrose. To his surprise, he saw Elsa's dragon Linnae pacing back and forth outside the window, almost like she was a guard dog or something.

"Those awful terrorist people took Rapunzel, that's what!" Primrose exclaimed. She was nearly in tears. "Elsa's dragon tried to fight back, but it just ended up making a mess instead. Once they had Rapunzel, all of them just…left. And I heard that Elsa had lost control again, but I didn't see a single snowflake here…"

Kristoff grinned. "That's because Elsa got poisoned by a serum that made her all ice-crazy. Basically made her dark side in charge. But even Dark Elsa wanted Corona untouched, evidently." His expression sobered as he realized just what Elsa's aunt had said. "I thought most people didn't even know Princess Rapunzel _had_ magic."

"Word must have gotten out somehow," Thomas said, shaking his head. "I sent a lot of our guards out to search for her, but I know she's been taken out of the country. I don't know what to do-I have no idea where she's been taken."

"Probably the same place Elsa was taken," Kristoff said.

"Elsa's been taken?! How would that have happened? She can use her magic to defend herself!" Thomas said, puzzled.

"It's a long story…"

* * *

ARENDELLE

 _Three and a half days,_ Anna thought for the zillionth time. That was how long Elsa had been gone now. And still she could do nothing until Kristoff was back with more help. She knew he should be back any second now, but she was still on edge. _I'm at home in a literal protective bubble and Elsa is missing._ Every night it took her hours to fall asleep, and even then she tossed and turned. Did Elsa have a proper bed? What if she was scared? Was she hurt? Anna had no doubt they would get Elsa back eventually, but she was inwardly terrified of what condition they might find her in. _Elsa's stronger now. She'll be all right. Won't she?_

"Linnae is here with Mr. Kristoff, your mother, and your uncle," Gerda told her just then.

 _Linnae? Linnae!_ Anna thought happily. Linnae could contact Elsa! Linnae wouldn't be able to tell her or the others what Elsa said, but at least Elsa would know everyone was trying to help her. That should make Elsa feel better if she was upset or frightened.

* * *

PHILADELPHIA

For Elsa, Linnae's message that everyone was trying to help came none too soon. She knew Rapunzel was being kept somewhere nearby from eavesdropping on her captors' conversations, and then she knew this was probably the place Meri had told her about. Where her American friends were, too. This place wasn't controlled by genuine government people. The woman she had seen first was, and so were two other personnel she'd seen, but the others were not. And definitely not the someone that had come in with a mask and tried-and okay, succeeded-in scaring her. He'd tried to take her necklace and then gotten insanely angry when it wouldn't come off, and hurt her already injured hand all over again, saying more was on the way if she didn't 'cooperate' and 'not ask for unreasonable things'. And that she had no right to anything at all.

She was just glad the stupid man hadn't noticed the faint glow in her eyes when she'd received Linnae's message. _I didn't even lose control. Not even a little bit. Anna would be angry with me for not fighting back, but she'd be proud I didn't panic, too,_ Elsa thought, holding her injured hand close. The second she was alone again, she sent Linnae a simple reply. _I'm all right. Somehow get Anna to know that I'm okay. And send Rapunzel a message that I'm here and that everyone is trying to help us._

Linnae's reply came back quickly: _Anna wants to know if you are hurt, Elsa._

Elsa instinctively touched the stinging marks on her neck where her necklace had dug into her skin from the man trying to yank it off. _Not anywhere important. Not inside,_ she messaged back. And she knew that was the truth. No matter what any of these people did to her, they could not hurt her inside. Not this time. She had kept Anna and everyone else safe, and nobody could take the knowledge that Anna loved her away from her. Right this second, Elsa thought she might be quieter than usual after this if she was at home, but that was it. She was not going to panic or get all upset again.

 _Elsa, if you can just talk to their president, you could tell him what's going on and he would at least let Rapunzel go. You do not have to cooperate with terrorists, only their genuine government people,_ Elsa's inner voice told her. She looked down at her hand and bit her lip. If she didn't 'cooperate', that man would come back and just hurt her worse. If she defended herself, then Arendelle would be in danger because the president would think she wasn't keeping her word, and everyone would know she still had full access to her magic. If she _did_ 'cooperate', she was worried what sort of information the bad people could get about her. What if they found some way to drain her powers enough that it made her sick or something? Elsa's magic couldn't be taken from her, but it could get depleted. Or what if they injected her with more of that awful serum? _That would be horrible for everyone…_

Elsa decided she would just continue what she had been doing-cooperating with things that she knew wouldn't hurt anyone else and refusing otherwise. And she would not let anyone take her necklace or her silvery ice-dress she was still wearing. Those things were hers. Besides, she would have to use her magic to do that and they all still thought she didn't have access to it at all.

 _I have to hold it together. I am not going to lose control, and I am not going to break down inside, either._

But Elsa could not control what her magic did while she was asleep, and she jerked awake during what she thought was nighttime to see snowflakes floating around her. At home she would have been delighted to see that a bad dream hadn't caused her to make a layer of snow all over the bed or something, but here she was horrified. She had realized mere hours after being put here that there was one of those video camera things Diane had told her about (that seemed like ages ago now) that tracked her every move, but that there wasn't one in the tiny bathroom she was allowed to use twice a day. That was where she let out some of the nervous pent-up magic so as to decrease the chances of making a mistake from keeping them hidden all the time. _Elsa, you've ruined everything! What did you do?!_

Sure enough, no less than six armed someones barged in seconds later, and she instinctively backed against the wall. _I didn't mean to! I didn't hurt anything. I know I didn't._

 _Don't say a word, Elsa. Silence is best right now. Don't tell them you had a bad dream. With any luck, they'll just realize your hands aren't the only way your magic can get out._ Elsa knew she had not produced any ice or snow from her hands because of the bad dream; she'd just made snowflakes around herself because she was upset. That was all.

"You little liar!"

 _Don't fight back with your magic, Elsa. You can't._ Elsa bit her lip and put one arm up to protect her face, but she didn't attempt to defend herself otherwise. _Papa would say I have the right to defend myself right now as long as I didn't use my powers on them,_ she thought absently. _And Kristoff would tell me I'm in danger and that I should do something._ The problem with this was that Elsa sans magic couldn't even beat Anna, who was slightly shorter than she was and was probably going a little easy on her, too. How could she defend herself against six people, then? _I can't. I'd just make them more angry at me._

Elsa yelped in pain when she felt her head slam against the corner of something sharp, and she _knew_ there was ice forming beneath her. She just knew it. _What am I supposed to do? Do I fight back? What would Anna say?_

 _Elsa, they probably already saw the ice. Just do something._

 _I can't! I promised I wouldn't. I have to make sure they leave Arendelle alone!_

"Leave it be. Won't be any use otherwise," Elsa heard one of them say. She held her breath nervously and kept her eyes shut as she heard all the footsteps leave. _Thank goodness. I have to figure out something to do. I have to…_

* * *

When Elsa came to completely minutes later, the first thing she felt was something gentle touching her shoulder. Then she realized everything _hurt_. All over. But mostly her head.

"Elsa, don't move," she heard Rapunzel's voice whisper. Elsa flinched in pure surprise and tried to open her eyes. Yes, there was Rapunzel right there. It felt like Rapunzel was probably cradling her head and shoulders in her lap. Why was Rapunzel being allowed to even be in the same room with her? Nobody even knew that she knew that Rapunzel was there.

"No, don't-! Don't try to heal me!" Elsa managed to say when she realized what Rapunzel was about to do. Elsa's vision was still blurry, but she could see that Rapunzel had the same sort of bands on her arms as Elsa did. That meant Rapunzel was probably safe unless she made a mistake like Elsa had done, but of course that wouldn't happen.

"I can't leave you like this!" Rapunzel hissed desperately. "I know the stupid bands don't work-I can feel it. They let me in here because they're trying to scare me. And it's…it's kind of working, too." She gave Elsa's shoulder a slight squeeze when she realized Elsa's eyes were flickering shut again. "C'mon, Elsa, stay with me. Please." _Maybe I could heal Elsa's head so she feels better anyways. They must be really scared of her if they hurt her like this simply for making snowflakes by accident. And why won't Elsa_ do _anything?! She doesn't even seem scared, really. Just resigned._ Rapunzel carefully shifted one hand behind her cousin's head so it would just look like she was holding Elsa to anyone watching. Then she whispered part of the song as quietly as she could, letting the tiniest bit of her healing magic flow into Elsa's head. Elsa seemed to relax some but still didn't open her eyes. "Teeny bit better?" Rapunzel asked hopefully.

"Yes," came the quiet reply. Elsa kept her eyes shut; she was worried someone would find out what Rapunzel had done, so she stayed still. Then she realized something else: Rapunzel hadn't caused any trouble like Elsa's own dark-self had. Therefore Elsa was fairly sure it had not been genuine U.S. government people that had taken Rapunzel. But could she then claim that she had a right to make a fuss about that since Corona was Arendelle's closest ally? Maybe she and Rapunzel could talk to one of the non-terrorist people and try to convince him or her what was really going on. _I'm on to something here, I just know it. It may not get me free, but it should at least help Rapunzel. Maybe the president will decide me helping expose the bad terrorist people is enough to pay back for the mess dark-me made._ Elsa was so lost in thought that she didn't realize what Rapunzel was doing until it was too late. "I told you not to do that!" Elsa exclaimed, although she was grateful all the same.

But Rapunzel was unapologetic. "I don't care. They have no right to hold me here, and I'll not put up with them tossing you around," she said firmly. "I think I understand why you won't fight back yourself-it's got to with some giant mess you didn't make on purpose? Because of some serum thingie?" When Elsa nodded, Rapunzel bit her lip. _So I was right. But now what?_ "But I didn't do anything, not even something that wasn't my fault. So I'm not cooperating any more. I am not going to let them hurt you if I can help it."

" 'They' are not all government employees, Rapunzel," Elsa said quietly. "We can't put our countries in danger. The bad terrorist people will threaten Arendelle and Corona if we don't cooperate." Elsa looked around in confusion when she felt the temperature plummet abruptly. _I didn't lose control. I know I didn't. What's going on?!_ Already Rapunzel was starting to shiver violently, and Elsa closed her eyes and began forcing the temperature back up herself. She could easily get the temperature back around freezing, but her magic wasn't good for much more than that, simply because it had been dropped by some other means before she had a chance to meddle with it. "I can't raise it any more than that," Elsa whispered, unsure what to do…or why that had happened.

"Don't you dare touch her!" Rapunzel shouted a second later. She shoved Elsa into a corner and just planted herself in front of her. "I won't let you hurt her again!"

"This one speaks English and the ice-making one doesn't?" someone Elsa hadn't seen before here said.

Rapunzel thought quickly. If Elsa hadn't let these people know that she knew English, she probably had a good reason for it. She caught a fleeting glance from Elsa, who acted like she was wiping a tear away, and then she knew what to do. _Elsa_ wants _them to think they scared us because then they'll be less likely to hurt us again. Okay._ "Yeah, you've scared her half to d-death," Rapunzel said sadly. She turned on the waterworks. "It's not _fair!_ We didn't do anything. I wanna go home!"

Elsa had to bite her lip hard to keep herself from giggling in satisfaction when they all immediately left again and the temperature slowly began rising back to its original state. Sure, one was making derogatory snide comments about girls being crybabies, but…they had left. Which was what Elsa had been counting on. If the bad people were so intent on "breaking" her and Rapunzel, then she was not going to be too proud to let them think they had succeeded. _Then we'll be more likely to be left alone, and they won't think we would ever dare to try to cook up a scheme with the genuine government employees that are here, too._ She waited until Rapunzel had sat down next to her and then whispered her tentative plan.

Rapunzel's eyes grew big in surprise, but she just put her arm around Elsa like she was trying to comfort her so anyone watching wouldn't think they were up to anything. She wondered how much of Elsa's demeanor was acting; Elsa was sitting the same way she did when she was genuinely upset, her arms wrapped around her middle hugging herself, her eyes scrunched shut. "Elsa, are you _really_ all right?" Rapunzel asked quietly.

"Mostly," Elsa said after a moment. She wasn't stupid; she remembered what had almost happened to Anna when she'd stopped those intruders from hurting and taking Anna. And Elsa was worried one or more of the bad people here would get it into their heads to want to hurt her or Rapunzel that way. She was willing to let them toss her around, but she was _not_ going to let anyone hurt her-or Rapunzel-that way. That thought terrified her. _Am I really worth it? What about everyone else in Arendelle?_

"I think _something's_ worrying you," Rapunzel commented.

Elsa sighed and hesitantly voiced her worries. "To top it off, I know they're holding a few people I met when I visited the U.S. before. What if _they're_ being hurt? And they haven't given me any food but a bit of bread since I woke up in this place. Just water otherwise. Are they doing that to my American friends too?" She hid her face in her hands as she added, "One of them is _nine_. Katie didn't do anything!"

"Elsa, we need to rescue your friends and get out of here, whatever the cost!" Rapunzel was whispering, but she sounded horrified. She shuddered. "There has to be something we can do that would get all of us free without risking the safety of our family and friends back home. There just has to be."

Elsa's eyes fell on the video camera thing up in the corner. Its glass lens looked back at her like an eye. Then she looked down at the annoying (and useless) wristbands on her arms. And then she looked back at her cousin, the only other natural mage that she knew of. "You know what? I think there is. But we're going to need that one genuine government lady that I saw at first. She should be willing to help, I think."

"Why would she believe us?" Rapunzel asked.

"Because everything that just happened is recorded on that weird moving picture taking device thing."

* * *

ARENDELLE…

"Uncle Thomas, what d'you mean by that?" Anna asked, puzzled. "Of course Elsa and Rapunzel aren't safe. Those nasty ol' terrorist people have them!"

"They are also two pretty young ladies. I would be mighty surprised if none of their captors would want to hurt them," Thomas said, hoping Anna would get the message. "I hope Elsa has the sense to defend herself and Rapunzel if it came to such a thing."

Anna's face turned white. _Oh._ "We'll just have to get both of 'em back before something awful like that happens. So there."

"They can both defend themselves, and Elsa doesn't have to use her magic to do so, either," Kristoff said confidently. "I bet she agreed not to use her magic. So, she can defend herself without breaking whatever agreement she made as long as she does it without using her magic."

Gerda frowned. "Mr. Bjorgman, I would not trust Miss Elsa to do that. She doesn't have a good track record for being willing to defend herself. At _all_. If anything, she's probably just trying to figure out how to get her cousin and her American friends free. We have to get them freed as quickly as possible…"

Idun looked thoughtful as she tried to come up with a viable argument to get her daughter out of trouble. She wished Elsa hadn't been willing to allow herself to be captured in the first place. _Why did Elsa do that? I mean…I fully understand why she did, but I can't help but think it had something to do with her mindset that she thinks everything bad that happens is her fault. Did she make an effort to explain that she didn't make all that mess with her magic on purpose? Did she at least say it wasn't her fault and then decide to do what she did?_ "Perhaps we can start with at least making sure only genuine government personnel are holding Elsa. We know that isn't the case right now. At least if we did that, we could make sure she isn't being hurt or otherwise abused."

"Idun, Elsa being held captive just because she has something people want to study and she happened to make a mistake-however costly- _is_ abuse," Thomas said quietly. "Especially since she's probably not very good at recognizing when things are not her fault. All anyone has to do to get her to cooperate with anything is convince her that she is there because she did something wrong." He shook his head and sent a slightly accusatory look at Idun. "I know you care about Elsa. Why didn't you let Primrose come visit her and Anna after the accident? She always talked about wanting to see her little Arendelle nieces." Thomas could remember seeing Elsa when she was only two-and-a-half. That child had been quiet, but she was clearly happy. Everything he'd heard about present-Elsa made him feel sick. He wished Elsa's parents had let him and Primrose adopt her.

"Agdar shut the gates! You know that already! Don't you dare try to make me feel guilty about those things n-"

Thomas just stared at her. "Be glad you are not Elsa's father, or I would say some choice words right now," he interrupted. "I don't claim to know Elsa well, but I don't know how you and Agdar could treat those girls the way you did! You both _hurt_ them. And yes, I say 'them', Anna included. Why would it be a good idea to separate a five-year-old from her big sister?! It's absolutely ridiculous!"

"Elsa _had_ hurt Anna. She was dangerous…" Idun said lamely, but she didn't even sound like she believed it herself.

"Elsa was eight years old. A little kid. She made a mistake that, from what I understand, wasn't her fault _at all_. You and Agdar punished her for an accident. You took everything away from her…even her feelings. I don't care what the circumstances are, you don't tell an eight-year-old to 'conceal, don't feel'. That is advice you give for a public speech or political discussions or something similar. Not for a child." Thomas usually didn't get mad easily at all, but right now he felt like he had to say what was on his mind. His niece probably would be at home right this second if it wasn't for this sort of thing, because she would never have frozen Arendelle the summer before and made herself such a widely-known controversial figure. "And Rapunzel talks about her cousins all the time. She's told her mother and me all kinds of things. What does it matter if Elsa has a weak leg or if she cries or has panic attacks sometimes or that she has magic no one else does? She just needs people being willing to accept her, that's all. Nothing more, nothing less. Making Elsa feel bad for just being herself is absolutely deplorable." He spun on his heel and just strode out of the room, saying he would be in the library if Anna wanted him.

Anna and the others had been just standing still in shocked silence at Thomas's outburst. Anna bit her lip and shifted her weight from one foot to the other. She kind of felt bad seeing her mother cry, but, well…Uncle Thomas hadn't said anything untrue. And she wanted Elsa back and Rapunzel to be home safe.

* * *

Out in the marketplace, word had quickly spread about what the queen had done…some of it true, some of it not so much. "Queen Elsa would never have purposely frozen another nation unless she was provoked into doing so," Marie, who ran the chocolate shop with her husband, said firmly.

"I heard the queen isn't even in Arendelle anymore-that those people with the creepy-looking ships captured her," the jeweler Lise replied. "Thanks," she added as Marie handed her the small bag of sweets.

"Maybe S-Snow Queen Elsa let 'em d-do it to keep us s-safe," eight-year-old Daisy said, scowling. She hopped down off the counter and tugged her mother's skirt. "C'n I go p-play outside now?"

Marie gave her daughter permission, and rather than going 'outside to play', Daisy ran off towards the castle, which was still encased in its ice bubble. Daisy had been terrified when she'd seen the funny ships, but after a bit of thought and hearing that Elsa was gone, she was absolutely sure that her idea was right. Grown-ups tended to feel bad for her, she'd noticed, because of her stutter. And grown-ups would also probably be very likely to listen to kids if they turned on their charm. Maybe she and some of the other Arendelle kids could use those things to get their Snow Queen back home. Daisy skidded to a stop and doubled back, heading towards the house she knew Max, Maya, and Ina lived. Three-year-old Ina was too little to help, but Max and Maya probably would be willing to help.

Once Daisy had been allowed into the castle courtyard and had explained her idea to Kiara, Eliot, and Anikka, the six kids called for Linnae. "Linnae can take us straight to D.C. The adults are taking way too long to figure out what to do," Kiara said firmly. "We'll just tell the guard at the gate that we want to go for a flight, Linnae. Understand?"

The ice-dragon nodded agreeably and let all six children up on her back. They did not fit very well, and Linnae was worried one of them might fall off. Rather than listen to Kiara's instructions, Linnae flew towards the Valley of the Living Rock, hoping Grand Pabbie or one of those other rock trolls that she did not like would tell these dumb albeit with good intentions children that they needed a saddle or something else similar so they wouldn't fall off.

* * *

"Not this way, you giant thing!" Kiara grumbled, trying in vain to make the dragon turn around. As the oldest at twelve, Kiara knew she should be responsible for the younger ones. Elsa would be both angry and disappointed if she didn't.

Linnae made an annoyed huffing sound and refused to listen. She just continued toward the troll valley.

Once they were at the Valley of the Living Rock, Linnae shielded all six children with her wings. While the ice-dragon was willing to voluntarily come here, she still didn't trust the trolls. She blew cold air on them until Grand Pabbie unrolled in front of her and then sat back on her haunches, hiding the children from view.

"Linnae, you have brought others with you. I sense they are worried but have a plan. What is it?" Grand Pabbie asked matter-of-factly.

Kiara shoved her way out from under Linnae's wing. "I don't know why Elsa's ol' dragon brought us here." (She ignored the huffy hissing noise from Linnae.) "We know Elsa's been captured, and we're gonna get her back. Daisy thinks we might be able to charm the president into letting her come home." Kiara remembered the troll crystals, and another idea struck her. _Maybe the trolls can give us some of their magic somehow. Then if those terrorist people try to hurt us we can just fight back._ "Could we borrow some of those crystals or something?"

 _Those immature children need a saddle or some other safe way to stay on my back when I am flying, not magical power crystals,_ Linnae 'told' Grand Pabbie.

Grand Pabbie nodded at Linnae but kept his focus on Kiara. "Princess Kiara, unlike a natural mage's abilities such as Queen Elsa's or Princess Rapunzel's, power crystals can be stolen. I cannot let you take them into a country where we know there are people after magic that do not want to use it for good."

"I dunno what p-power crystals are, but c-can you please d-do something?" Daisy asked hopefully. "C-can you t-tell us if Snow Queen E-Elsa is all right?"

The old troll closed his eyes, but then jerked back, shook his head and sighed deeply a moment later. "I cannot. I cannot sense her magic's location because it will not allow any magical interference whatsoever. It has virtually 'locked' all magic out except for that which is in her family."

"Try Rapunzel then," Kiara urged. "Both of 'em are in the same building, and if she's all right, then Elsa probably is as well."

"Healing magic is not tied to the mage's emotional state as ice magic is," Pabbie explained regretfully. He gestured towards Linnae's wings and added, "There is a little girl named Anikka here. I must speak to her." Linnae reluctantly allowed little Anikka out from under her wing, and Anikka curtsied the way she'd been taught. Grand Pabbie's rocky eyes crinkled in amusement. "I see Queen Elsa has taught you well. Listen well, little girl. I sense you have a role in the events entailed in retrieving the two natural mages, more than the others. I have something for you. Do not let anyone take this from you."

Anikka nodded as seriously as she could and tried to stand up straight as Pabbie slipped a necklace woven from the moss the trolls' clothes were made of around her neck. A green and pink glowing stone served as the pendant. "What's that? C'n I have magic like Elsa's?" the little girl asked eagerly.

"That is not 'magic like Elsa's'. That is a last resort troll magic explosive that you are not to set off unless the time is right." Grand Pabbie suddenly looked very old and tired. "If that does not happen, you are to give it to Miss Elsa when you see her."

Kiara frowned. "Anikka's not even six! I'm the oldest here. Why does she get the magic?" she demanded, crossing her arms.

"You just answered your own question. You are too impulsive and rash, young Kiara. As are Max and Maya." Grand Pabbie paused. "Anikka is the queen's adopted daughter. She has more influence than you and the others do."

Kiara thought for a minute; that sounded reasonable, but she was still slightly miffed. "Is there any way you can give us magic of some kind so's we can fight if we have to?" she asked, secretly kind of really wanting her own electricity powers back.

Grand Pabbie frowned disapprovingly at her. "Your motives for asking that question are not entirely pure, Princess Kiara."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Kiara asked, but she was turning red.

"You know exactly what that means."

* * *

PHILADELPHIA

"Check the moving picture maker," Elsa repeated after explaining what was really going on to the lady that she knew was genuinely a government employee. As she had hoped, that lady was sent back to 'her' room. Elsa's inner clock told her that it was morning; she wasn't sure exactly how many days she'd been here, but she was fairly certain her guess that it was morning was accurate, despite there being no clock in this place. _Probably meant to disorient me?_ she guessed.

The lady frowned and handed Elsa a glass of water and a piece of bread. The fact that Elsa wasn't calling the security camera by its proper name but knew what it did made her think Elsa was telling the truth, but it just sounded so ridiculous. And above all, why hadn't Elsa defended herself if what she said was true? "You're expecting me to believe you have full access to your magic and didn't defend yourself from multiple people attacking you. That doesn't sound believable."

"I came here voluntarily to keep my country safe. Your soldiers did not capture me." Elsa held her head high and met the woman's gaze straight on. "I have the ability to leave here any time I choose," she added pointedly. "But I won't, because it's _my_ job to keep Arendelle safe."

"I just find it difficult to believe that someone with the abilities you have would willingly allow themselves to be hurt."

"Then explain to me why my cousin is here. Were you and the others really told to kidnap her? If so, your government is meddlesome and unfair. If not, terrorists did it!" Elsa kept her voice at a whisper, not knowing who might be able to hear her outside the room. "Princess Rapunzel being here means I then have a right to fight back for Corona's sake. Would you like that?"

"You don't have a right to do any such thing, and just what are you going to do?"

"I said, _I have full access to my magic._ Would you like to find out?" Elsa shot back in frustration.

"This is just going in circles. If you do have full access to your magic, why would you let people hurt you? Why would you have let yourself be captured? In that case you could have simply used pure force to protect your country."

"So that everyone outside Arendelle will be out to take over my homeland in the future once I am dead?" Elsa asked indignantly. "I think not! Arendelle has been a sovereign nation in its own right for hundreds of years. It is _my_ job as reigning monarch to ensure my country stays that way." Elsa's voice was quiet, but her back was rigid and she looked the woman right in the eyes, her expression worried but clearly proud and determined.

"What makes you think that wouldn't happen anyway?" the woman asked, her tone softer now, genuinely curious. "Your country doesn't have the modern technology and conveniences we do."

"They do not seem to have improved safety any," came Elsa's instant deadpanned retort. "You and every other person or entity that has been attacking Arendelle for the last year have been doing so because of me, not because of interest in Arendelle itself. Both of us know that." Elsa looked down at her hands and began fiddling nervously with her dress. _Elsa, don't say anything stupid. You can't._ She took a deep breath before continuing without meeting the woman's eyes. "This…this _magic_ I have…I didn't ask for it. Nobody 'made' me to be this way, either-I wasn't altered in any way. I was born with it. You are not going to be able to give powers like mine to anyone else, no matter what your intentions are." _And I wouldn't wish them on anyone, either._ Elsa felt Rapunzel give her arm a reassuring squeeze, and she paused again, trying to figure out how to word what she wanted to say. "I do not know or understand exactly what your country wants from me, but I promised to cooperate as long as my country-and allies-were left alone. That means Rapunzel goes home-now. I did not promise to cooperate with a terrorist group. I know it doesn't excuse what I did in the least, but I did _not_ freeze your country on purpose. I was poisoned with some kind of serum."

 _She said 'magic' like it was a…a curse or something._ "But you don't have complete control when you're…yourself, either. Even if you have a hundred percent good intentions, you're still a potential danger to the general public. I do believe you are no evil tyrant wanting to take over, but what do you suggest to be done about the potential danger then?"

Elsa hesitated. Right that moment she could feel ice tingling in her fingertips. She felt like a frightened little girl again under her father's lecturing, and she honestly felt sick. Even though she knew the woman wasn't trying to hurt her, she felt completely stripped bare at hearing a near-stranger voice the very concerns she herself had had for years. She _would_ always be a potential danger, and there was nothing she-or anyone else-could do about that. _I want Anna. She would know what to say._ "I don't know, ma'am, because that thought has plagued me since I was very little," Elsa said finally. She didn't cry, but her hands were shaking and she was tense all over. What if this woman decided she wanted to hurt her too, like the other people had done? What if she was _never_ able to go home? _Anna will come for me. She promised. She promised._

"I will check the security camera," the woman said abruptly. It was clear to her that Elsa was telling the truth to the best of her ability. All she wanted was her country's and her allies' safety. And she dearly wanted to go home, but she was not going to try to escape, either.

"The moving picture maker?"

"Yes."

* * *

The second the woman was gone, Elsa slid off the cot and went to the tiny bathroom, unable to keep the bread down any longer. She washed her face and hands and just returned to the cot in silence. _What if that woman just tells the bad people everything I told her? Did I make a mistake?_

 _I feel sick. And I'm scared. I want to go home. I miss Anna, and Gerda, and Kai. What's Anikka doing? What about Katie, and Salma, and Ahmed, and the others trapped in this place? And I don't want to be a…a laboratory experiment for the government the rest of my life. I…I just want to be a normal girl. I want to be able to walk down the street and have people just see someone ordinary._

 _Stop it, Elsa. Stop freaking out and feeling bad for yourself. You're doing your job._

 _What if those bad people come back and…_ Elsa forced the thought to go unfinished; she was vaguely aware of Rapunzel gently rubbing her shoulder, but somehow it wasn't helping. Rapunzel was not Anna or Gerda, and that was what Elsa's frantic mind wanted. She wanted to be at home in the castle. At least the four walls of her room were familiar and made sense to her. Here everything seemed strange and foreign and just…too bright. She wasn't sure how to explain it. And having that 'moving picture maker' watching her every move was just creepy to her. _Calm down, Elsa. Just…calm…down. There's frost on your hands and arms. Get rid of it before someone bad notices it._

"Elsa, did you throw up a few minutes ago?" Rapunzel asked quietly once her cousin seemed at least mostly all right again.

Elsa nodded but said nothing. _I tried not to. It didn't work. Anna would be disappointed._ I'm _disappointed._

"Don't you think it's normal to be frightened and upset right now? Because I do," Rapunzel said quietly.

" _You_ didn't barf," Elsa pointed out, still facing the too-white wall. She scowled at the wall, suddenly wishing she could scribble all over it or tear it up somehow. It was just so plain and she wished she could make marks on it herself to fix that.

Rapunzel sighed. "May I re-braid your hair?"

"I don't care."

* * *

ARENDELLE

"What do you mean, Linnae's gone?!" Anna exclaimed. "How are we supposed to get to the United States quickly otherwise?"

"Anna. Listen to me," Kristoff said quickly. "Linnae isn't all that's missing. The little kids are gone too. I just found out from the gate's guard that Linnae left right through the main gates with Kiara, Anikka, Eliot, and three other kids…I think one of their names was Daisy?"

Anna frowned. "That's the little girl that lives above the chocolate shop. Her parents own it. Elsa knows her. Why'd the guard let them out like that, though?"

"He said the kids claimed Linnae was taking them for a flight. Makes sense to me since everyone knows Elsa loves the Arendelle children." Kristoff sighed, knowing their plan was ruined at the moment. Not only that, there were six children in danger now as well. "Now what?"

"I'll bet the kids left with Linnae to get Elsa back on their own," Anna said in an uncharacteristically quiet voice. "Elsa doesn't really spend much time 'out in public', but whenever she does, the children love her to death. Maybe Daisy realized Elsa was gone and came to the castle to try and get the others to help her, I don't know." _Daisy was really shy and stuff the first time we saw her…it must have taken a lot for her to do something like that…_ "Could you go talk to ol' Grand Pabbie? Maybe he can help."

"Bah, trolls'll be useless," a familiar voice said beside her.

Anna scowled. "What are you doing here, Hans? Get lost. We're trying to help Elsa and Rapunzel. Go away," she spat. "You served your sentence. So get out of here." _Elsa would be upset with me for being mean when the creep hasn't actually done anything this time. She'd say to be polite, at least._

"Contrary to popular belief in these parts, I rather like Elsa. I'd like to help rescue her," Hans said, blinking at the angry princess unfazed.

Kristoff looked disgusted and moved between Hans and Anna almost instinctively. " _Queen_ Elsa does not need 'rescuing'. She's not some object for you to win. And she certainly doesn't need you, either," he said firmly. While Kristoff certainly didn't see Elsa the same way he saw Anna, he somehow felt very protective of Anna's sensitive older sibling. This was mostly because he loved Anna and Elsa was important to Anna, so Elsa was important to him too; but also because he kind of felt like an older brother to Elsa, despite the fact that they were the same age.

"She got herself captured. She needs rescuing. And I would like to volunteer my assistance," Hans said again. He paused before adding, "I heard my sister is missing now as well. Kiara might be the biggest pest that ever lived, but I'd like to make sure she's safe."

Anna sighed. "Let him help, Kristoff. We need all the help we can get right now. Even if it's a-hopefully-former creep." She held up her fist and addressed Hans. "But if you do _one_ thing wrong, you're going to be in trouble! I don't care what Elsa says, if you get her hurt o-or k…killed, I'll have you executed," Anna said darkly.

* * *

WASHINGTON, D.C.

"We need a meeting with your president," Kiara repeated to the policeman that had stopped her. "You captured Arendelle's queen without just cause." She flicked her long hair out of her face and ignored the younger kids trying to get her to translate what was going on. Kiara had grown more and more frustrated and irritable since their little entourage had arrived. None of the others could speak English-at least not a lot-and Kiara was sick of translating for her little allies back and forth.

"Do you have any identification on you?" the policeman asked.

Kiara crossed her arms and spouted off an angry retort in both Norwegian and her own native Danish before switching back to English. "Why does everyone in this place have such thick skulls? You know _darn well_ where we're from! Such incompetent idiocy!" She pointed at Linnae. "That is Queen Elsa's dragon, Linnae. Linnae brought us here because Daisy here asked her to. We want Elsa back. It's not her fault your crappy government is all full of terrorists."

"I don't think I like your attitude, young lady."

"I don't like yours." Kiara stood her ground; years of dealing with her older brothers had given her far too much practice at arguing and defending herself.

Maya frowned; she may not have understood the whole conversation, but she knew Kiara was being really rude, and that was not going to help them get Elsa free. "Vennligst, Kiara, være mer høflig, eller de vil ikke hjelpe oss," she begged. "Vil ikke hjelpe Elsa, husker?"

Kiara scowled. "Vel, blir hand dum!" she grumbled. But Maya was right; not being polite was not going to get Elsa help.

"Did you just call me dumb?" the policeman asked, clearly a bit amused.

"Stupid," Kiara corrected, not particularly sorry. _I've got to be nicer or this trip is completely wasted._ "Sorry, I just really want to help Queen Elsa, that's all, and this is frustrating."

The argument abruptly halted when Linnae shook her head in disapproval and just flew off. Linnae could easily see that Kiara, while not being helpful _at all_ , could take care of the younger children, and the dragon decided she would go back to Arendelle and get Anna and the actual adults to help. Kiara and Daisy and the others were not going to get Elsa free-Kiara because she was being too pushy and the others because nobody understood them.

"So where is that dragon going now? Off to destroy something?" the policeman asked warily.

Kiara decided to just make up something and hope she was right. "Back to Arendelle. She was just going to drop us off here," she fudged. "So can we _please_ talk to your president?"

"Even if I wanted to, I can't just have you and your friends waltzing onto protected government property and saying you need to meet with the president," the policeman said in a friendlier tone. "You could be carrying a bomb or something."

Little Anikka tugged Kiara's dress again. "Hva sier han?"

Kiara sighed and told Anikka what the policeman had just said. Then, to the policeman, "Why would I have brought some explosive with me when I've got Anikka here. She's barely six."

"Hva sa du?" Anikka asked now.

Kiara just shushed the little girl this time instead of translating what she'd just said. "Can we at least _see_ Queen Elsa, please?" she asked, hoping they could at least get permission to do that. Kiara remembered Daisy's idea that the six of them might be able to help simply because they were kids and grownups might feel bad for them, and she pretended to brush a tear away. "We really, really miss her. She didn't mean to make it snow all over the place. Those bad people poisoned her."

"Look, kids, at this point she's a political prisoner, and a potentially dangerous one at that. I can't let six children go see someone who literally snowed most of the country in and made some kind of snow creature that stole a dozen kids. Granted, all twelve are from abusive households as far as we can tell, but still." The policeman frowned; surely if the legendary Snow Queen had been captured, she was neutralized. It should be safe for these children to see her, then. "She's being held in Philadelphia. Perhaps I could make arrangements for you to visit, but only under the conditions that you're supervised during the visit at all times."

Kiara translated that information to the others, and Daisy smiled and clapped her hands. That wasn't the best outcome in Daisy's mind, but at least they would get to see Elsa and Elsa would know they cared about her. And they would be able to make sure Elsa wasn't hurt or something else awful.

* * *

PHILADELPHIA

Elsa was very, very relieved when the woman whose name she still didn't know came back saying that she believed everything Elsa had said after checking the security camera. "What are you going to do with me now?" Elsa asked quietly, unsure she wanted to hear the answer. _Well, hopefully she'll agree to the plan Rapunzel and I came up with…_

"It looks suspicious already that I've been here talking to you this much with no new information about you, Elsa," the woman said. She frowned and took a deep breath; she actually looked a bit scared. "Therefore we'll have to use your plan. There's no way to concoct a new one without causing more suspicion."

Elsa blinked in surprise at hearing the lady call her by her real name. This was the first time she'd heard _anyone_ in this place refer to her as an actual person with a name to call her own. Although she didn't want to admit it, repeatedly being referred to as 'it' or nothing at all made her feel somehow…subhuman, and that hurt. _Don't you dare say 'thank you' to that woman for using your name, Elsa. Just…don't. Technically she should be using your title besides. She's not your friend-not right now anyways._ "That is logical," she said finally, fiddling with her hands nervously.

"I can get your cousin out of here in a disguise, but you'll have to be able to find your American friends and free them yourself. From what I can figure out, they're on the floor below this one. Stairs are at the end of the hall. Take out the security cameras if you can. It'll buy us time."

"You guys have to keep in mind that nobody knows how much so-called manpower the terrorists have," Rapunzel pointed out. "Once they catch on, they'll go after Arendelle and probably Corona too."

Elsa shook her head. "No, they won't. They'll be scared of me," she said softly. "I have seen people like that before. They kick you when they think you're down, but they're cowards. They saw what a mess dark-me caused." _And once they fall for our plan, they'll be even more scared of me since they'll think I froze someone even though I'm not really going to do any such thing._

 **A/N: So, lots of location hopping this chapter since everyone is trying to do something different to fix everything. No, the Kiara and the younger children shouldn't have run off, but they were successful in getting permission to at least see Elsa. And yes, they would have been more successful if Kiara wasn't quite so abrasive and pushy, too, but Daisy doesn't know English (why would she?). So yes, communication issues when your lead spokesperson is Kiara, who's kind of rude even though she means well.**

 **Elsa and Rapunzel have successfully gotten someone to realize what's really going on; now let's see if their new (still nameless to them) ally will be able to help. At this point, the _real_ government did authorize Elsa's capture, obviously, but they're not the ones that kidnapped Rapunzel. Elsa knows this and is trying to take advantage of the glaring mistake the terrorists made in leaving evidence on the "moving picture maker", as she calls it. She knows the loyal employees don't want to actually hurt her, even if they don't entirely think she is human. And, of course, at this point, Elsa is willing to let the bad guys be scared of her, because their plan relies on it.**

 **Get ready for a big surprise-for both Elsa and the others-next chapter!:)**

 **Next chapter coming soon:)**

 **P.S. And I'll see if I can get my blog's address on here this time... (without the spaces:))**


	41. Chapter 41

**A/N: Thanks to everyone who's followed/favorited and/or is reading but not reviewing:)**

 **FluffyKitten-I figure that Kristoff probably would feel like a brother to Elsa eventually. She's kind of like a bossy older sister, lol.:P And bossy or not, siblings WILL try to protect each other. I have a little sister, and _I'll_ boss her around, but anyone else, well...they better watch out if they bother her.:) That's just it-those men _are_ cowardly. They know Elsa is stronger than they are even if they won't admit it, and people like that will hurt others to try to "keep them in line". Kind of like any other bully in school or anywhere else...just the stakes are higher.:P And, of course, they don't like that someone like Elsa, who's just a young woman, is stronger than they are, either. No promises, but a happy ending is gearing up (again) :)**

 **IndyGirl89-Well, Elsa should not trust her 100%, but she and Rapunzel don't have much choice at the moment. They'll be fine:)**

 **Elsa Tomago-I PMed you, so I won't make you reread the same thing here:)**

 **moohamquest-Linnae is very similar personality-wise to little Elsa, and little Elsa is, you know, 8. So Linnae isn't exactly the most mature in the world.:P I'm glad you're enjoying the story:)**

 **On to the story!**

ARENDELLE

"Miss Anna, you have a visitor," Kai told Anna that evening during dinner. "I don't know why he's here, but it's the American president."

Anna instantly jumped up from the table, meal forgotten. If the president was here, it probably had something to do with Elsa. Maybe he brought Elsa with him, Anna thought hopefully. "I'm coming to the Great Hall right now then. He's probably here about Elsa, I bet."

Once Anna was on the dais in the Great Hall, she had to keep herself from asking a bunch of things about where Elsa was and what exactly was happening to her. She bit her lip and brushed a wisp of hair behind her ear and just said, "I'm assuming you're here 'cause of something having to do with E-Queen Elsa." Anna made sure to use her big sister's title; even if Elsa was being held prisoner somewhere, she was still the queen. So there.

"Yes, Princess Anna. I received a frantic call from one of the personnel where she is being held that the place is full of government enemies. Evidently your sister was able to ID those she thought were loyal and those that were not after explaining what was going on…she told the lady that gave me the call to check the 'moving picture maker'-security camera-when her story wasn't believed initially."

Anna frowned. "What was on the camera thingie that made your employee believe her?"

"I was getting to that. Princess, I did authorize your sister's capture, but she was not to be physically harmed in any way, and I had nothing to do with Princess Rapunzel's abduction. As near as I can tell, Queen Elsa accidentally let out some snowflakes while she was asleep, and the terrorists were so frightened by it that they beat her up. That Coronian princess-I believe she's your cousin?-healed her, though."

Anna balled her hands into fists, her blue-green eyes clouded with tears. "Elsa didn't defend herself?" she asked in a small voice. _Elsa was probably scared and had a bad dream or something, and then she woke up to people that wanted to hurt her. Is she okay now? She has to be. Elsa, please be all right._ Then, in her very best 'queen' voice, Anna added, "You should release my sister simply based on that. You didn't hold up your end of the deal. It's not Queen Elsa's fault you have bad people in your country. At all. Those people are the same ones that poisoned her in the first place and caused her to make all the mess with her magic. They should pay, not her." There. That sounded reasonable, didn't it?

"She still poses a potential danger to the public," came the evasive reply.

"Well, whatever you did to her that you figured would remove or suppress her magic or whatever obviously doesn't work. Keeping my big sister locked up in some lab facility thing isn't really controlling her. She's letting you do it because she wants to protect Arendelle," Anna pointed out. _There is no way to physically keep Elsa from using her magic unless she's injured somehow. I know that. And even if her hands are hurt, she can use her thoughts to direct her powers anyways._ A sudden thought struck her. Maybe he really didn't expect to control Elsa's magic and wanted something else entirely. "Look, what do you really want from Queen Elsa? Tell me that, and then maybe she or I can negotiate from there."

"We're working on a way to make weapons of some kind from the…magic, but so far everything is negative. It's impossible to extract the anomalies from her blood, and tests cannot identify what the so-called "magic" itself is composed of. Magnified under a microscope her blood looks normal aside from these strange blue sparks in it. And they are not a separate kind of cell-they are imbued within normal cells. They should separate, but they won't. Mixed with any normal human blood it congeals and won't mix. I could go on and on…I suppose the only fact discovered is that your sister can never donate blood or have a blood transfusion. And-"

"My sister has magic," Anna interrupted huffily. "It isn't a science thing, contrary to what you want to think." _Or Elsa herself, for that matter. She tries to make her magic fit with what science laws she knows too…_

"There is no such thing as magic. Magic is merely science that we don't understand."

Anna's scowl grew deeper. "Then Elsa's magic is still just that-magic. Even by your logic," she said firmly. "Quit treating her like a…a specimen or something! She's just a human girl, like me." She honestly wanted to yell that it was stupid and unfair too, but she didn't. That would not help her get Elsa back home safely.

"Humans don't have weird abilities that appear supernatural to any ordinary person. They just don't. Are there more individuals out there like your sister and your cousin? If so, where are they?"

Anna merely shrugged. "I don't know. Maybe they're keeping their powers a secret so people like you don't stick them in some lab thing. None of that is any concern of mine. I just wanna know what you want from Queen Elsa-or my cousin, for that matter. You aren't gonna get any usable magic from Elsa 'cause it's hers."

The president was silent for a moment. Maybe the princess was right. The fact that the queen had not fought back despite clearly being able to do so made him think that perhaps there was no point in holding her prisoner anyways. It didn't make her more or less potentially dangerous, after all. "The unseasonable winter weather caused significant damage across my country," he said carefully.

"You want Arendelle to pay for the damages," Anna stated, knowing quite well that was the issue. _We don't have money for that! We'd be ruined. What do I say? What would Elsa say?_

"Most people in my country-specifically all the young kids-know it was a mistake, however. They are not angry with her."

Anna had a crazy idea run through her head, and she bit her lip and shifted her weight from one foot to the other nervously. Elsa would be horrified if she heard Anna's idea, but…it just might work. _But can Elsa handle it? She hates being the center of attention. And yet…if it let her come home completely free, I think she'd do it, wouldn't she?_ "Would they pay to see her?" Anna asked hopefully. "Like a show or something?"

"I hardly think we need see more ice and snow over everything. What on earth are you talking about?"

Anna's voice became more animated, and she began gesturing excitedly. "No, no, no, not Elsa's magic. A concert!" She could see Kai shaking his head frantically, but she ignored him. This could work! It really could! "My big sister can sing really, really good-well, I mean-and people could pay for tickets and all the money can go for fixing all the damage."

Kai coughed politely and just said, "Excuse me for interrupting, princess, but you _know_ Her Majesty does not sing in front of people, let alone thousands." He actually thought Anna's ridiculous-sounding idea could work, but he was worried how Elsa might react in front of a huge crowd like that when she knew how much was on the line. The last thing they needed was for Elsa to panic and make a power mistake.

"I bet Elsa would rather sing in public than be locked away," Anna pointed out. She glanced at the president and added, "Excuse us for a minute, I'll be right back." Then she tugged Kai out of the Great Hall and shut the door behind them. "Kai, Elsa's stronger now. You know she is. She could do it. I know it sounds absolutely crazy, but…"

"Miss Anna, if she messes up even one time, if she blanks or panics on a stage somewhere…" Kai shook his head. "We don't even know if anyone in their country would pay for an event like that. The other thing, princess, is that she's been kept in whatever place they put her in for nearly a week now. She's probably more than a little stressed. We can't expect her to carry the entire plan, knowing full well if she messes up, we're all toast." He paused before adding, "Forgetting any of that, what on earth were you expecting your sister to sing?"

"Her let-it-go song?" Anna offered. "I bet Elsa knows loads of the songs we have in songbooks in the library, too." She felt her eyes beginning to tear up, and she bit her lip hard. "I just want Elsa home safe, and I thought if all the little kids liked her they'd convince their parents to take them to see her, and…I don't know…"

Kai just hugged the princess tightly. "Miss Anna, nobody will understand anything she's singing," he said quietly. "I can say quite confidently that she doesn't know that song she made up in English."

"But the melody's the same. And I bet she could translate it, too."

* * *

MEANWHILE… IN PHILADELPHIA

"Good grief, Elsa, I hope this works," Rapunzel whispered under her breath.

Elsa bit her lip and stared at the blank wall nervously. The lights were dim now, as their hopefully-trustworthy ally had promised, telling the girls it was time to pretend to go to sleep for the evening. In fifteen minutes, their plan would be underway. Beneath the wristband on her left arm was hidden a small alarm 'clock' of some kind; Elsa wasn't a hundred percent sure how it worked, but it was supposed to vibrate at each time the next part of the plan should begin. She hoped it would actually work as it was supposed to. _Elsa, stay calm. Don't panic. You can't._ "Well, it won't be difficult for me to act my role," Elsa muttered back. _I'm already terrified._

Rapunzel wasn't sure what to say to that; she knew quite well what Elsa meant. The trouble was that the bulk of the plan rested on Elsa. If Elsa messed up in some way, they were all toast. The plan wouldn't even work without Elsa's magic. Elsa would have to act out her very real frightened emotions without letting them actually take over. "You can do it, Elsa," Rapunzel said finally.

"I hope so," came Elsa's shaky reply. _I can do this. Anna would say I could, too._

Precisely fifteen minutes later, Elsa felt a sharp buzz on her wrist, and she instinctively flinched. _Time to put my acting skills to work,_ she thought. If Anna were here, she would probably tell her to pretend she was in a play or something. Maybe that would help. She would be an actress playing a…a…a what? _An alien,_ Elsa could almost hear Anna's gleeful voice. _A weird, pretty green alien from an ice planet!_ That would be a mighty fine joke, playing the very weird thing some of these people thought she was.

With that thought, Elsa began the plan. She had to pretend like she was having a bad dream…that would be believable since she'd technically already done that here once before. _But don't overact, either, Elsa. You have a reputation for trying to hide your emotions. It has to look like you're trying and failing to hide them._ And she had to move quickly enough that nobody would come 'check on her', too. In one quick movement, she acted as if she were losing control and simultaneously set off two blasts of ice, one in her cousin's general direction and one toward the ceiling.

Rapunzel jumped up and backed away, as if she were frightened that Elsa might freeze her, and Elsa found she didn't need to summon fake tears…they were already there. Rather than brush them away, she held out her hand again and sent a second ice blast toward Rapunzel; and a split second later, she took out the security camera up in the corner. Then she constructed an ice statue that looked just like Rapunzel. With any luck, anyone who saw it would think she had frozen Rapunzel solid and so they wouldn't go looking for her. Elsa felt herself shaking slightly all over, and she was grateful when Rapunzel ran over and hugged her close.

"C'mon, Elsa, everything's gone perfectly so far, but our window of time is ticking away," Rapunzel said quietly. "Go on and do your next part. We'll be fine. Remember, we're supposed to meet behind this building under some big tree…I hope there really is just one big tree…"

Elsa nodded and smiled slightly at Rapunzel's comment about the tree; she agreed with that worry a hundred percent.

* * *

 _Stairs at the end of the hall and down one floor,_ Elsa reminded herself a minute later. Now outside the room that had been her living quarters for…well, Elsa wasn't completely sure how long, but she guessed about a week…she felt happy at simply being out of there, despite the fact that the trouble wasn't nearly over yet. Elsa nearly ran into someone, took a second look at him, and instantly froze him in place up to his neck without another thought. That was one of the people that had hurt her when she'd made the snowflakes by accident, she was positive. _I'm not going to stoop to his level. I won't hurt him,_ she thought firmly, and continued her way down the hall, ignoring the angry shouting behind her. Now that one of the bad people knew she was free, he would spread the word, and she had to move quickly. _Freeze his mouth shut, Elsa. Just make sure it's meltable ice, and he'll be free in a few minutes…he'll just be cold in the meantime,_ Elsa's inner voice 'said'. She did not want to get into an actual fight if she didn't absolutely have to.

Elsa made it to the stairs easily with no more incidents, but the second she tried the door to the stairs, she realized it was coded somehow. The door would not open; there were numbered buttons and she didn't know what to do. Would the door shock her or drop something on her if she broke it down or put in the wrong code? Or set off some alarm in the whole building? Elsa bit her lip hard; the time was ticking away quickly and she had to decide what to do. _What do I do?_ She turned back toward the man she had accidentally run into a minute before. He probably had a code thing to get himself on and off this floor, right? Okay then. She would take his. _Except…he might have a gun or something that would let him tell everyone in this place I'm free. The only reason I know he is no threat at the moment is because he was as surprised as I was when I ran into him-I just recovered first._

She broke the hinges instead and slipped out, ignoring the loud _eep!eep!eep!_ noise now blaring through the air. _Please just be making that noise on this floor,_ she thought hopefully, carefully making her way down the stairs. _I don't want a whole building of bad people after me._ Elsa thought about simply icing the stairs, which would slow any potential pursuers down, but she didn't know how Rapunzel and their ally were intending to get out of the building and she didn't want to risk hindering their progress. She yelped when she slipped on some sort of slippery black puddle on one of the metal stairs. _Is that…oil? Why's there oil on the steps?_ "That is so nasty," Elsa muttered to herself as she pulled herself back to her feet. At least she hadn't ended up sitting in it anyways. She would have to wash her hands really, really well once she and the others were out of here.

Elsa didn't run into anyone else until she had broken down the door to get into the main hallway on the floor one down from where she had started. "You promised not to fight back," the terrified employee squeaked. When he dropped his weapon on the floor and kicked it over to her rather than shoot her or call for backup, she kept one hand up in defense position, but moved into a more relaxed stance otherwise. This was one of the young soldiers she'd seen at first back in Arendelle. He wasn't any older than she was and probably was just trying to do his job. "You….guard….this level?" she said in hesitant English, purposely letting more of her natural accent into the words than she ever would otherwise. Usually Elsa did her best to speak other languages as fluently as she possibly could, although she knew she was not nearly as good at matching native accents as Anna was. _I might be letting him know I know some English, but I don't have to let him know how much._

The young man scrambled for some kind of electronic device on his belt and began talking into it, and Elsa instantly froze it solid. "Please, what d'you want?" he asked nervously, and let out a girlish yelp when he found his feet frozen in place, but Elsa had already started down the hall. _What's she doing? She could have killed me and anyone else in this place, but she's been here for a week and done nothing. What's happening now all of a sudden?_ He watched in stunned silence as the Snow Queen made her way down the hall, freezing each door down as she went. She peeked in the first five and seemed to find nothing that interested her (those rooms he knew just held office and lab things), but she let out an ear-piercing scream when looked into the sixth. _What is in there? That's one of the two rooms that I've not been allowed to see into. And…_ His thoughts broke off when she suddenly appeared back in the hallway, her fists sparking with blue magic, her pale face white. He flinched when a streak of magic shot seemingly towards him, but it went way over his head…

…and took out the security camera for the hallway. "What's in that room?" he couldn't help asking, his curiosity having gotten the best of him.

Elsa only stared in shock, her blue eyes filled with tears. _He doesn't know? Well, then maybe…_ She picked him up with her magic and wordlessly plopped him down in the doorway. If he would actually help her, he would offer. And if he did not, she would freeze him in place like she had the bad person upstairs.

"That's a little kid!" came the horrified response. "What's going on here?! There's no way the president authorized that! I heard somethin' funny was going on, but…You fixing to get her out of here or something?"

Elsa dropped him but still kept her guard up. She nodded and headed straight towards the someone that made her scream in the first place. "Katie," she said softly, "remember me? I'm getting you out of here." Elsa hesitantly touched the little girl's shoulder, and Katie flinched but instantly smiled when she saw Elsa.

"I haven't told 'em a thing," Katie said proudly, but she was clearly frightened. She watched in delight as Elsa froze her bonds and easily pulled her free. The last time Katie had seen Elsa, Elsa had looked for all the world like a normal, ordinary girl to anyone that didn't already know her. Now she was clearly Elsa the Snow Queen, and she was rescuing _her,_ Katie. That was awesome in Katie's mind. Although Katie was still scared, she felt special too. Elsa was here, and they were going to get out of here.

"What?" Elsa's pale face scrunched up in both distaste and anger at that comment, and she carefully hugged Katie close. _Katie barely knows me, and she let herself be hurt to keep them from finding out anything she knows about me. Why?!_ "My cousin will heal you the second we're out of here," she promised firmly. She looked up at the young soldier that seemed both horrified and willing to help. "You did not know what this room contained. Which others do you not know about? We will check those," she announced, suddenly quite certain that those would be the rooms where the others were. Elsa just plain didn't care who knew she could speak English any longer; seeing Katie hurt and scared had made her angry. Now she would just fight back. So there.

* * *

Less than five minutes later, Elsa and her nervous new ally-Andrew-had found Diane, Ahmed, Salma, and three others that Elsa quite honestly didn't know, but she figured they were people she'd been seen near in the United States previously or something. All were a bit banged up, but disturbingly enough, poor Katie was the one in the worst shape, and it sickened Elsa that she knew exactly why, too. Katie was a child, and she was the one who knew the most about her and theoretically would be the easiest to 'crack'. Obviously that hadn't worked, but she knew that was how the terrorists had been thinking. "Now we get out of here," Elsa told the little group.

"Put the kid down or we'll open fire," an angry voice announced a moment later.

Elsa did 'put the kid down', but she also stepped in front of Katie and the others protectively. _Time to fight, Elsa,_ she could almost hear Anna say. _You played it nice as long as you could. Now you fight._ Somehow she was not scared…not this time. That voice belonged to the same person that had hurt her hand and tried to take her necklace several days back, she was positive it was. He might be the same one that had hurt Katie, too. Elsa instinctively froze him in place up to his neck; he wouldn't die, but he would be very cold until one of his comrades broke him free. Two more took his place, stepping around him, and Elsa did the same to them…and then the next two after that, too. _I can easily hold position here, but how do I get everyone out safely? We're trapped._ Could they potentially get out through the wall straight outside? Elsa knew they were still five floors up. Allowing ten feet or so per level meant they would have a fifty foot drop to deal with.

 _I can just make a ramp and we'll slide down. And then I'll dissolve it so we can't be followed._ Elsa began carefully working her way back towards the wall. She was just about to blast through the wall to get herself and the others out of there when something that looked like a fireball came out of nowhere and ricocheted off the wall behind Elsa, catching her in the arm. Elsa yelped in pain but managed to hit the fireball before it hurt anyone else. She frowned; rather than instantly disappearing, there was a puff of smoke, and droplets of water spattered the floor. _I've put out fires before and that did not happen. What's going on?_ Elsa stood clutching her burned arm nervously; now nobody was doing anything and the lull made her uneasy. What kind of weapon set off fireballs like that? _Elsa, you have to do something. And make your ice-armor so you won't get hit again, too._

Keeping her eyes on the doorway, Elsa quickly protected herself with her ice-armor and then began blasting a neat circular hole in the wall. She cringed when she heard the building creak; what if it couldn't take big holes drilled in the wall without collapsing?

"You or the others set one toe through that hole and you'll burn," a new voice said.

 _That voice has a slight accent. Sort of like…mine?_ Elsa hesitated and just threw up an ice wall, which she realized she should have done in the first place. She scooped little Katie back up and went to the hole. Sure enough, the dangerous drop awaited them, but Elsa simply created an enclosed slide. "The end is protected with powdery snow. Just go!" she whispered to Diane and the others, sending them all down one at a time. Just as Elsa was about to slide down herself with Katie in her arms, a quiet hissing sound came from behind them, and Elsa bit her lip before shoving off, blocking the top of the slide behind them. Something was very, very wrong; she could sense it in her bones. The burn on her arm pulsed painfully, and she could swear she could feel unnatural heat from something. _Is something on fire? A modern weapon thing of some kind?_

When Elsa stood up after reaching the bottom, she threw up another ice wall behind her little group before facing the others. "Now we find that tree," she said firmly. A second hissing sound came from behind, and Elsa clutched Katie closer.

"Queen Elsa, I think there's another one like you," Diane said, pointing.

Katie hid her face in Elsa's shoulder, having already seen what Diane was pointing at from the angle Elsa was holding her. "We're dead, we're dead," she muttered, clearly terrified. Ordinarily natural ice would not trump fire…would it? Elsa's ice magic probably trumped natural fire, but…if this was more magic, and Elsa did not like to fight…Katie shuddered.

 _Another one like me? What does that mean?_ Then all at once Elsa put the pieces together…the weird fireball, the water droplets, the hissing sounds as the fire went through her ice. Somebody had fire magic! Somebody has fire magic? There's someone else with elemental powers like me? Elsa shoved Katie into Andrew's arms and turned to face a girl that seemed about her own age, perhaps a year or two younger.

The girl held a sparking fireball in one hand, the other held out beside her, much like Elsa herself did when she was using her air currents. She seemed upset and then incredulous as she and Elsa stood off. "I know you," she whispered. The fireball vanished, although she continued holding out her other hand. "You helped me and my brother once."

Elsa tilted her head to one side and frowned, narrowing her eyes. _I did what? She seems familiar, but…I would have remembered a fire mage! I know I would have._ She continued holding up her hand defensively, but the sparkling blue magic swirling around her hand disappeared. "I think I'd have remembered a fire mage," she deadpanned finally.

"I'm Emily," the girl said, as if that explained everything. She hesitated before switching to Norwegian, hoping that would get Elsa to believe her. "It was Halloween. You defended my brother and me from bullies. And you gave me a doll and candy. Ironically enough _you_ were dressed as a fire fairy or something like that." Emily turned and looked up the ice slide behind them. "Get out of here quick as you can. I'll stall."

Memories from fourteen or so years ago flitted through Elsa's mind. She did remember the incident Emily was talking about. It also explained why she was still using her own heat-based version of air currents despite not trying to fight anymore-Emily could not walk. And why she had a slight accent that Elsa recognized, too. "You could come with us," Elsa said before she could stop herself.

Emily's expression grew sad. "I can't. My brother got in with a…not good crowd. I've got to stay with him and get him to change back to the big brother I know. I'm sorry." She disappeared back up the slide without another word.

Elsa heard a quiet, "I'm _really_ sorry I burned you, Pri-Queen Elsa," from somewhere up the slide, and then she and the others were left in silence. Elsa could only stand there in shock momentarily. There was someone else with elemental magic. She had met the someone when she was little and not known. Elsa looked down at the burn on her arm and just blinked at it. Emily couldn't have known how her own magic made her immune to direct magic attacks-it was just a coincidence that the crazily thrown fireball had ricocheted off the wall and hit her that way, but still. There was someone else with elemental magic. There was someone else with elemental magic _like her._ "There's someone else like me," Elsa whispered to no one in particular. "There's someone else like _me._ "

* * *

"But you said we could see E-Queen Elsa," Kiara protested. "Not see the inside of some ol' hotel!"

"Kiara, there is something going on in the facility right now; they can't have visitors," the policeman said patiently. "Your friend is fine. You'll get to see her once everything is cleared safety-wise."

Kiara frowned and crossed her arms. "What's going on? And we didn't bring stuff to stay overnight. We want to see Queen Elsa, that's all, and you said we could," she said stubbornly.

"They've had some sort of security breach. I'm not cleared to give any more information than that." This wasn't really entirely true, but he didn't want to scare the children, either. The policeman paused before offering to get them pizza. All kids liked pizza, didn't they? He really did not want to be in charge of the six unauthorized foreign children any longer. They really weren't being naughty, but still. The youngest girl had been jumping on one of the beds continuously since they had arrived in the hotel suite; the oldest one, Kiara, was just plain bossy; the two redheads that he figured were twins kept trying to convince the other two remaining kids-Daisy and Eliot, he remembered-well, something, he wasn't entirely sure since they weren't debating whatever the topic was in English.

Kiara told the others about the pizza, and they all immediately nodded and grinned. Pizza was yummy.

* * *

AN HOUR LATER…

"I'd like to thank you for what you did, Elsa. You managed to rescue seven captives single-handedly, not including your cousin."

Elsa frowned, not missing that this man was using her name, at least, but he was not using her title. She actually liked being called just by her given name, but she also knew it was rude. And quite honestly, she didn't know what a SWAT team was, but she did recognize that this man and his teammates were supposed to take care of issues like rescuing hostages and things like that. Except, you know, they couldn't do that if they didn't know the captives were there. "It was a group effort," she said modestly after a moment's thought.

"All my men had to do was take the terrorists you had neutralized already," the man pointed out. "Most young women would have panicked in that situation, but you didn't."

Elsa's frown grew deeper. "I do not think being a young woman has anything to do with panicking under pressure," she replied quietly but firmly. She pointed at the woman dressed in the same uniform as the man she was talking to. "You have a woman on your team," Elsa pointed out. "That means she must be able to work in tense situations, too." This earned Elsa a pleased smile from the woman in question.

"I just meant ones that haven't been specifically trained for situations like that. I meant no offense."

Elsa nodded politely; that was acceptable, although it still sort of made her grumpy. She had _not_ been trained for such a thing, and she knew she was not good at fighting situations. For example, if she'd simply created her ice-armor and put up a wall in the first place, she probably could have gotten the others out without ever even having to directly deal with the bad guys, or fire-mage-Emily, whose motivations Elsa still didn't understand.

"Hey, maybe y'all could put in a good word and get Queen Elsa sent home a free person," Andrew suggested.

Elsa tried very hard not to look too excited at that idea; that had not been why she had acted the way she had, but she really did want to go home, too. Katie ran over to her and just grabbed her hand. "She took me to her cousin and she healed me from those bad people hurting me," Katie said, holding Elsa's hand tightly. "She ought to get to go home!"

"You have the literal power to force us to let you return to your home," the SWAT leader said, addressing Elsa. It was half a question and half not.

Elsa wasn't sure how to respond to that. _Anna would tell me to just 'own it' but make it clear that I wouldn't do that._ "I do, yes, but I am not going to do that," she said carefully. "My country is safe in my sister's hands until such time that I might be able to go home."

"And your cousin healed your young friend here but not that burn on your arm?" Now the man seemed puzzled.

"Princess Rapunzel can't heal it," Elsa replied cautiously. Suddenly Elsa felt that she should not mention Emily or the fire magic. The other girl might get into trouble, and Elsa didn't want her to be a target if she could help it. Fire was, after all, by definition, even more volatile and destructive than ice. Emily would be perceived as more dangerous than Elsa herself. _Please just think it has to do with my magic or something. I don't want to lie._

* * *

ARENDELLE

After posing her concert plan to the president, Anna had actually managed to convince him to let Elsa come home fairly easily. This she had done mostly by talking up how powerful Elsa really was, that it was pointless to try to hold her prisoner when she was just letting them do it. And the simple fact that someone that would let bad people hurt her if she thought it would protect others was no public menace.

"I'll have her brought back tomorrow," the president assured the princess finally.

Anna scowled. "Tonight. You get Queen Elsa released _tonight_ , and give her a nice place to stay if you can't arrange a way for her to get here tonight," she said stubbornly.

"You don't really have the right to demand that, princess."

"Do, too. You promised my big sister she wouldn't be harmed, and you failed. So I have _every_ right to demand she can come home tonight!" Anna's usually happy, girlish voice was clearly angry. She drew herself up to her full height and added rather huffily, "You're lucky Queen Elsa is nice and doesn't hold grudges. And you're lucky she's the queen instead of me. Because I would toss you out of here faster than anything otherwise." She saw Kai shaking his head patiently and tried her best to backtrack. "Well, I just want Elsa home, that's all. Sorry," Anna muttered, not really sounding very sorry at all.

To Anna's surprise, the president smiled at her. "I understand. I will make sure she's safe."

 **A/N: And...we're ALMOST to the end:)**

 **If anyone's wondering what incident Elsa and Emily were thinking of, check out chapter 7 of Arendelle Eventyr, "A Fairy and a Kraken". Remember neither of the girls knew the other had magic way back then, hence why they're both so surprised in this chapter. (And why Emily almost calls Elsa ' _Princess_ Elsa' instead of ' _Queen_ Elsa'!:P )**

 **Next chapter coming soon!:)**


	42. Chapter 42

**A/N: Thanks to everyone who's followed/favorited and/or is reading but not reviewing!:)**

 **FluffyKitten-Well, I was trying to go off what would probably happen if people today knew someone like Elsa existed. They would probably act like that.:/ Lol, even Elsa tries to make her magic fit into It's just she understands that magic does exist.:) Katie will be fine; she's free now. I know people like that in the real world probably would do a lot worse than what they did to Katie and Elsa and the others, but I'm not writing those sorts of things, if you get my meaning. So.:P Yep, Emily has appeared before!:) No promises about the concert! Who knows, it might not even happen...*dundundun* :) In any event, yes, Elsa is coming home:)**

 **Elsa Tomago-Yes, he should. And, you are right: lots of things pose a potential danger to the public. The issue here, in his mind, is that Elsa isn't an inanimate object (like a gun) that could be potentially dangerous. She's an intelligent being with her own will and mind that's powerful enough to freeze thousands of people solid from a long distance away if she so chose. She could quite literally take over without much trouble. Of course, we know that Elsa is just a human girl with magic and that she won't do that, but he doesn't. (Also, I'm being mean and dissing my own country's government here, but the U.S. government has authorized some very unethical things-experiments and the like-in the past. Honestly if Elsa were alive in our world, she would probably end up in a government lab for "research" or something. "it's for the greater good" "it could help the military" etc.) I've tried to hint at that issue without actually dealing with it, because I'm not doing that to Elsa, absolutely not. Emily didn't use her powers during that past incident for the same reason Elsa didn't, she thought she wasn't supposed to. I'll write more about Emily eventually:) Elsa's going to make it home this chapter!:)**

 **Olivia O'Neil-Yep!:) Elsa knew her family was safe, so she was more at ease trying to get herself and her friends out, even though she was still nervous. And yes, finding someone else with elemental magic means a LOT to her. Elsa has grown up her whole life thinking there isn't anyone else like her, and sure, Emily might not be the _same_ , but she does have elemental magic, just like Elsa...and she's a powerful natural mage, too. And you're right-Elsa won't like Anna's singing idea, but right now she just wants to go home and be left alone, so she won't make much of a fuss about it:)**

 **IndyGirl89-They're all mostly okay:) I mean, Emily burned Elsa's arm, but Elsa is fine, she's not upset or hurt badly. Rapunzel can heal everyone else, so they're fine, too.**

 **Can't stand Rule-Magic rules have to exist or the story-verse makes no sense. If you don't like my magic rules, that's fine, but there have to be SOME kind of limits.**

 **On to the story!:) (I am SO sorry for the super late chapter! I was having trouble with the last part of this chapter-you'll see why-and I've been sick and have a ton of schoolwork.:P)**

ARENDELLE

Anna couldn't sleep that night, even though Olaf had repeatedly told her that Elsa was all right. "But I know she's all right! I can sense her feelings," Olaf tried to reassure the princess, but Anna wasn't having it. She wanted Elsa back, and she wanted Elsa back now. Olaf tried to pat her arm reassuringly, but Anna just put a pillow over her head.

"Are you sure Elsa's all right? She's not upset at all?" Anna asked, her voice muffled in the pillows.

Olaf was quiet for a moment at that question. "Elsa misses you," he said finally. That wasn't something he could sense from Elsa herself; he just knew it was true. He didn't tell Anna that Elsa had been upset before-she just wasn't upset now. "Can we plan Elsa's birthday party?"

Anna sat up and just hugged the little snowman close. "Okay. I can't sleep anyway."

* * *

PHILADELPHIA

"I have orders to tell you that we can make an effort to get you home tonight, or go arrange for a hotel to stay for the night," the SWAT leader told Elsa.

Elsa didn't hesitate, and she couldn't keep a happy smile from spreading across her face. "I would like to go home, please," she said, but then frowned. "What is the catch? I do not believe that I would be randomly allowed to go home unless there is some caveat." _Don't get excited yet, Elsa._

"This message says that your sister has arranged something-I don't know what it is exactly. But you can go back to your country now."

 _Thank you_ ever _so much_ , Elsa couldn't help thinking, but she didn't say anything. If Anna had arranged something that got her free, that was kind of worrying, but she wouldn't know what the something was until she got home. "What about little Katie and everyone else?" she asked. Katie seemed to be all right now, but she was staying right by Elsa's side, clearly still nervous. "I want to make sure they are all safe."

"Katie's parents have already been contacted, and transportation will be arranged for all of them."

Elsa nodded and gave Katie a hug. "See, you can go home now," she said quietly. "The bad people are gone."

Katie nodded but still stayed where she was. "What if they come back? I want to stay with you. My parents couldn't find me," she mumbled. "Can we all come live in Arendelle? And my best friend too? She's probably wondering where I am." She blinked and hid behind Elsa when she saw the reporters coming toward them. "You're gonna be on TV, Elsa."

"What?!" Elsa was not at all pleased by this turn of events; all she wanted was to go home unnoticed. _A TV is the television thing that you play moving pictures on_ , Elsa remembered. She didn't want to be the center of attention, and she was tired of holding it together in front of everyone. She just wanted to be at home, in her own room, in Arendelle, and curl up and go to sleep. Still, maybe she could repair some of the damage she had made to her reputation by making all the mess with her magic before. That would be good. Katie was tugging on her arm, repeating the question about coming to live in her country. "You would have to learn a new language," Elsa said softly so only Katie could hear.

"I don't care. You know my language. So I can learn yours," Katie replied, clearly pleased with that idea.

This made Elsa smile. "Katie, I don't think your parents want to move and start over in a new country, but I would be happy to have you visit," she told Katie. Elsa flinched when one of the reporters addressed her. The portable spotlight things were disorienting to her, and she didn't catch whatever was said. "Jeg beklager, vil du gjenta det behage?" she said without thinking; then realized what she'd said. Elsa shook her head, feeling her cheeks turning red. "I'm sorry, would you repeat it, please?" she asked again. _Not a good start, Elsa. Don't you mix up your languages again_ , Elsa mentally scolded herself. If Anna had done that, she would probably pretend she had done it on purpose, but Elsa wasn't sure she could do that.

"It's ok, Elsa," Katie whispered beside her.

"You're the legendary Snow Queen?" the reporter said again, and held the mike out to Elsa, who figuratively froze for a second before just nodding.

"Does that device amplify our voices?" Elsa heard herself ask, and instantly realized she must have asked a silly question when everyone began laughing good-naturedly. Now everyone that was probably watching what was going on at home on their television things would have seen her make two mistakes. She sighed. "I would prefer not to be interviewed at the moment," Elsa said politely, hoping the people would just leave, although she figured they would not.

To her surprise, rather than leaving or asking her more questions, the reporter said, "Could we see a bit of controlled ice if you'd rather not talk?" He actually sounded rather curious rather than worried or frightened.

"You… _want_ to see my magic?" Elsa asked, utterly surprised. When she received a chorus of yeses, she smiled and backed up as she tried to think of what she could do that would just look pretty and not threatening in any way. _Anna would tell me to show them my snowflake._ She held out her signature snowflake in one hand; then transferred control to both hands and let the snowflake grow bigger and bigger until it was a good twenty feet wide, floating and sparkling above everyone's heads. Then she dissolved it and made two icy prisms, holding them up to the too-bright spotlight things, making rainbows dance around everyone. Elsa spotted Emily in the shadows a little ways away with someone she figured was Emily's brother, and beamed when the fire mage gave her two thumbs up. _What is Emily doing? I thought she said she had to take care of her brother or something…_

* * *

ARENDELLE…

"We have to find some stuff for Elsa to sing," Anna explained to Kristoff, who just stared at the princess dubiously.

"First, I thought we were planning a birthday party. And second, I don't think Elsa is going to like your concert plan," Kristoff pointed out.

Anna rolled her eyes. "You sound just like Kai. And Mom. And Gerda. Elsa can do it. I believe in her. You guys should too. We have to get Elsa to believe in herself. She's really, really good at singing!"

"And we all know she doesn't like people listening to her sing, too. Anna, what if-I know it's a really small chance, but still-what if Elsa freaks on stage? And how about the fact that we all know she's going to need some downtime once she gets home? You're going to throw the responsibility of a concert that will cost Arendelle money we don't have if she messes up?" Kristoff signed and ran a hand through his hair. "And I wish you'd kick that dirty crook of a prince out of the country. Hans might have changed, but to be honest, I'm worried for your sister. She's too naïve and innocently nice for her own good."

Anna crossed her arms and put her head down on the piano. "I'd have executed him if I had the authority to like Elsa does," she muttered. "He likes Elsa and acts like he has a right to since he claims he's changed." Anna looked up at Kristoff, her blue-green eyes filled with tears. "All I see when I look at him is that awful, awful look on his face when he was about to kill Elsa last year. He wasn't even the least bit sorry for what he was doing. He was _happy_ about it. How can he claim he's changed when he was going to kill someone like Elsa in cold blood? His stupid ol' sword would've literally chopped her in half!" She could still remember seeing Elsa crumpled in a heap on the frozen fjord, feeling terrified that she might not reach her big sister in time to save her.

Kristoff just hugged Anna close. Part of him wanted to kiss her to try to make her feel better, but now was not the right time for that. He was not going to take advantage of her that way, so there. Anna would ask for a kiss if she wanted it. "The guy would have killed you if you hadn't…frozen solid right that second," he pointed out.

"I didn't care. I couldn't let Elsa die like that, thinking nobody loved her!" Anna's tears streamed down her cheeks faster and faster, and she abruptly pulled herself away from Kristoff and ran down the hall to Elsa's room and just flung herself onto the bed, burying her face in Elsa's pillows. She was tired of filling in for Elsa, but mostly she just wanted Elsa back. What if Elsa was physically all right but was all upset again? What if she wasn't ok, or something happened as she tried to get home? What if that horrid ol' Hans tried to hurt her again? _I just want Elsa back, and I want everything to calm down and just be…normal. Elsa has to be ok. She just has to._

* * *

"How d'you say 'good-bye', Elsa?" Katie asked. Rather than 'arranging transportation', Elsa had decided to just ask Linnae to come get her-it would be faster and she could go home by herself, too. Well, with Rapunzel, but still.

"Adjø," Elsa said. She smiled as Katie repeated the word back to her. The little girl's pronunciation was a bit off, but Elsa knew matching sounds that weren't in your native language was kind of hard, at least in her opinion, so she just repeated the word herself and didn't correct Katie otherwise.

Katie tried again and just gave Elsa a hug. "I want you t' come back soon," Katie told her.

Elsa honestly never wanted to come back again, but she didn't say so. That was rude and she might make Katie upset. "Maybe you can come visit instead."

"I hope so!" Katie could tell Elsa just wanted to go home, so she backed up and waved as Elsa and Rapunzel climbed up on Linnae's back. She shouted good-bye and kept waving until she couldn't see the ice-dragon anymore. Katie laughed and spun around when she felt a flurry of snowflakes around her. " _Adjø_ , thank you, Elsa!" she shouted.

* * *

ARENDELLE

Elsa was so happy to see Arendelle again that she cried when the castle first came into view for her and Rapunzel. _I'm home. I don't care what I have to do that Anna set up, I don't. As long as she didn't sacrifice Arendelle itself in any way._ "I'm so happy to be home," she whispered to Rapunzel.

Rapunzel just gave Elsa a comforting squeeze and didn't say anything. Elsa dissolved the ice bubble still protecting her home, and Linnae landed in the courtyard. Elsa suddenly felt as if she might be dreaming. Had she and Rapunzel really gotten everyone out of that building and been able to come home? Had she really met someone else with elemental magic like her? Elsa instinctively touched the burn on her arm. It still hurt. It was real. _Elsa, stop being ridiculous. You know everything that happened was real._

"Let's just go inside," Rapunzel said brightly, slipping her arm around Elsa's shoulders. Elsa seemed happy enough, but she was being awfully quiet, even for her.

* * *

A tired-looking Kai met them at the door, but his expression brightened when he saw Elsa and Rapunzel. "Your sister will be delighted to see you, Miss Elsa, and you too, Princess Rapunzel. Can I get either of you anything?" _They look all right…just tired. But it is late, so maybe they just need a good night's sleep_.

Elsa shook her head and didn't say anything, but she gave Kai a hug. Kai cared about her, he called her by her given name, and he didn't think she wasn't human, either.

"No, thank you. I think we'll just go to sleep," Rapunzel said, stifling a yawn. "Thanks for meeting us at the door!" She trotted off down the hall, figuring Elsa was following her.

Kai was tempted to tell Elsa about Anna's concert plan, but he decided not to. She looked exhausted, and he did not like how Elsa wasn't saying anything, either. "Miss Elsa, are you all right?" Kai asked gently. "I can see you're physically in one piece-I mean inside."

Elsa considered the question for a moment. Yes, she was all right. She was home, and those bad people were not here. "I'm okay. I'm just tired, and I'm happy to be home," she said softly. "Is Anna still awake by any chance? I don't want to wake her up to bother with me." _I want to talk to her, but I won't wake her up to do so._

Kai frowned. "The princess hasn't been sleeping well since you've been gone. She misses you, Miss Elsa. You are not a bother," he stated in as firm a voice as he could muster. Luckily he didn't have to say anything more; just then Anna came running into the entryway, nearly bowling Elsa over.

"Rapunzel said you were here! I ran as fast as I could!" Anna exclaimed happily. She hugged Elsa tightly and just squeezed her close. _Elsa's back! She's back, and she's not hurt. Well, not bad, anyways._ Anna had seen the bandage on Elsa's arm and wanted to know what had happened, but the important part was that Elsa was back and that she wasn't badly hurt. _Wait a minute. Elsa had Rapunzel with her. Why's her arm still hurt then?_

Elsa had been determined not to cry when she saw Anna, but that went out the window the second Anna hugged her. She hesitantly hugged Anna back, tears trickling down her cheeks. _Elsa, stop it. Anna will think there's something wrong with you. You held it together when you were getting out of that building. Stop crying._ Elsa was doubly frustrated with herself because she didn't understand why she was crying.

Anna felt something wet on her shoulder and instantly knew what it was. Elsa didn't feel particularly cold to the touch, but she was crying and clutching Anna as if something might take her away again. _I knew it. I just knew it. Elsa's going to be all upset again. This stupid mess undid everything and-_ Anna's thoughts broke off when she heard Elsa's voice.

"You rescued me," Elsa whispered. "You got them to let me go. I wanted to come home _so much_. I…I didn't panic, though. Well, not too much-I made myself sick once, but…" Elsa's voice trailed off as she pulled away from Anna, clutching her little sister's hand tightly. "It doesn't matter. Never mind. I'm just so, so happy to be home. I'm sorry I started crying like that, I just…I don't know. But I'm okay. I promise." She gave Anna a genuine smile and began heading toward the stairs, tugging Anna behind her for once instead of the other way around.

Anna grinned as she followed Elsa. Maybe Elsa really was just tired and happy to be home. _Except…I didn't "rescue" Elsa. She got back on her own, and she saved a bunch of other people in the process. All I did was convince that president that Elsa isn't a public menace._ Anna watched Elsa touch the button to work the ice-elevator, and the two of them went up to the second floor.

Elsa didn't say anything aloud, but she was smiling, clearly contented at the moment. All she could think was that she was back at home and Anna was here and her American friends were safe and her family here was safe too. Everything was okay now. _And I think I actually do feel okay. I'm not scared or anything._

* * *

Elsa flopped down on her bed gratefully the minute she and Anna got to her room. This bed was much, much softer than the cot she had been sleeping on for however long she'd been gone. And it smelled like home, like the minty soap they always used to wash things, rather than yucky disinfectant. She buried her face in the pillows and hugged her birthday dolls from last year close. Elsa abruptly sat up a minute later, her blue eyes slightly worried. "Will you…will you stay? Please, Anna?" she asked hesitantly. _I don't want to be by myself…I mean, I'd be okay, but I'd feel a bit lonely…_

"Of course I'll stay!" Anna assured her. _Elsa's all right. She has to be. Please don't be all sad and lonely-upset again, Elsa. It's fine, you're at home now_. Anna wasn't entirely sure what to think about Elsa's request; sure, both of them loved having mini-sleepovers, but still. _She hasn't been home for over a week. Of course she wants me to stay with her the first time she's going to sleep here after all that. It's nothing_ , Anna thought suddenly. _I'd do the same thing!_ With that logic, she curled up under the covers and just tossed one arm around Elsa, who almost instantly relaxed. "Elsa, you know what else?"

"What?" Elsa's quiet voice sounded awfully tired all of a sudden, although she was clearly happy now.

"It's after midnight. You got back in time for your birthday," Anna told her. "Tomorrow-now-today is your birthday." Elsa tensed up for a moment but then just scooted closer to Anna. Anna felt Elsa grow a bit cooler than usual, and she gave her big sister a comforting squeeze. "That's s'posed to be a _good_ thing, Elsa."

Elsa didn't reply for awhile. Then she just said, "I thought I missed it." _I made it home for my birthday?_

"Well, you didn't. Happy birthday, Elsa." Anna decided she would tell her sleepy sister about the concert thing in the morning.

* * *

"Aunt Idun, Dad, Elsa's here too," Rapunzel said down the hall. "I thought you'd want to know." She yawned and flumped herself back into bed in Anna's room. Although Rapunzel kind of wanted to be with her cousins rather than by herself, she figured Elsa might want to have her little sister all to herself. _Elsa really, really missed Anna, I know she did, even if she didn't say so._

Thomas gave his daughter a hug and sat down next to her, and Idun immediately went to Elsa's room. "Are you and your cousin really all right?" he asked quietly. "We were all so worried about you two."

Rapunzel yawned and just shrugged. "Yep, I'm good. Just really tired," she replied truthfully. "It's just…I think Elsa's ok, but she's been so quiet!"

"She's always quieter than you or Anna, though," Thomas said, frowning.

"Quiet even for her," Rapunzel insisted. "Those creepy people didn't treat us like humans, and I think it was worse for Elsa, because she knew she couldn't fight back-not at first, anyways-without risking everyone's safety here. They called us 'it', and some of the creepy people-not the government ones-hurt Elsa because she made snowflakes in her sleep. They were scared of her, I think." She paused before adding, "Oh, and we met an actual fire mage! And, get this, Elsa had met her before! Elsa defended her and her brother from bullies when they were little or something. That made Elsa happy."

Thomas sighed. "You and Elsa had each other at least, thank goodness," he said after a moment. He could tell Rapunzel was merely tired; she seemed like her usual self, really. Elsa should be all right too, he figured, once she had had a good night's sleep.

* * *

DOWN THE HALL…

Both of her daughters were sound asleep when Idun walked silently into Elsa's room. _They're safe. At home where they belong_ , she couldn't help thinking. Idun gently stroked Elsa's hair and then Anna's. Anna, who always slept like a log, didn't stir, but Elsa almost instantly opened her eyes and blinked up at her mother sleepily. "Mama?" _Why's Mama in Arendelle? Maybe I'm dreaming. No, you aren't, Elsa, she's sitting right there, you goof._

"I'm sorry, Elsa, I didn't mean to wake you up. I just wanted to see you."

Elsa couldn't help feeling a bit surprised at the tone in her mother's voice. Idun actually sounded very, very worried about her. _Elsa, you're being ridiculous. You know Mama loves you. Of course she was worried._ Still, Elsa scooted away from Anna, who grumbled in her sleep at the movement, and hugged her mother tightly. "You came for me?" she asked curiously, still uncertain as to why Idun was there in the first place.

"Anna sent for Rapunzel's parents and us. We were trying to plan a way to get you and Rapunzel back, but it turns out we didn't have to do that." Idun frowned at the bandage on Elsa's arm; she seemed fine otherwise, but if Rapunzel had been with her, she shouldn't be hurt at all. "What happened to your arm, and how come your cousin didn't heal it?" she asked.

To her mother's surprise, Elsa actually smiled. "Rapunzel can't heal things caused by magic, remember? There's a fire mage named Emily. She didn't burn me on purpose exactly…her fireball sort of ricocheted and hit me…" This wasn't completely true, but it wasn't false, either. "But Mama, there's another elemental mage! Like me." Elsa's voice was quiet, and she seemed to be suddenly very focused on her hands. "There's someone else like me," she murmured. _I'm not the only one. I wasn't defective or a freak, Mama. Just…rare, I suppose._

Idun did not particularly want to think about the idea that there was a fire mage of the same power level as Elsa. That was kind of disturbing to her, since at least ice in of itself wasn't volatile even though it could be dangerous. But she was happy that Elsa had met someone else like herself. It was obvious that it had made Elsa very happy. _It probably made her feel less…alone_ , Idun realized. Her heart clenched as she thought about how she might feel if she were Elsa. She hugged Elsa close. "I'm glad, Elsa. I'm glad it made you happy."

Elsa actually laughed a bit as she replied, "Me too."

Idun pulled away and looked Elsa right in the face, keeping her hands on the girl's shoulders. "Elsa, did any of those terrorist people hurt you?" she asked sternly, although she was unsure she wanted to hear the answer. _She should have been compensated in some way if that's the case, and I have to know if she's all right. Elsa does seem fine, though…_

Elsa hesitated, unsure what to say about that. "They couldn't hurt me where it matters," she said after a moment. _I'm fine. I got upset a bit while I was there, but I think anyone would. I didn't completely lose it, and I don't feel all…not right now, either._

"They did hurt you then."

"No, Mama, I mean it. They may have slapped me around a few times, but Rapunzel healed me, and they could not hurt me here," Elsa said softly, holding her hands to her heart. "I knew Anna would try to help, that everyone here at home was safe, and that Anna still loved me, and they could not take the knowledge of those things away from me, no matter what they did to me." She paused, suddenly realizing something else. "And I think…I think maybe mean words only hurt as much as you let them. Those bad people are nothing to me, so they cannot hurt me, either. I may have felt frightened in that moment, but I'm okay now."

Idun could tell that Elsa wasn't just saying things to keep her mother from worrying about her; she genuinely believed what she was saying. "I'm very happy that you're all right," she told Elsa, giving her another hug. "I'll leave so you can go back to sleep."

Elsa stifled a yawn as she curled back up under the covers. "Thank you."

* * *

The next morning after breakfast, Elsa found something in the library that surprised her, something she greatly disliked. _This was the caveat Anna agreed to, to get me freed?! Me singing some concert?! What was she thinking? Nobody would pay to see me, and I hate singing in public, and…_ She scowled and made a face at Anna, who was sitting on the sofa. "Anna, when were you going to tell me about this?" Elsa asked, holding out the paper with Anna's scrawled notes all over it. "What else did you do while I was gone that I should know about?"

Anna jumped to her feet and grabbed the paper. "I forgot-I was gonna tell you last night, but you were so tired. I didn't want you to not sleep because of it. I'm sorry," she said quickly. "Let's see, other stuff…Kristoff interviewed the guards like you wanted. We fired one and didn't replace him…uh…I tried to plan your birthday party some. It's tentatively planned for this weekend. I don't think there's anything else…" Her voice trailed off. Elsa looked mad, but she had her arms wrapped around her middle like she did when she was upset or nervous. "Elsa?"

"I can't sing in public. I can't," came Elsa's tense reply. She hesitated, unsure what to say. She knew Anna had just been trying to come up something that wouldn't hurt Arendelle money-wise and get Elsa herself free, but she didn't understand why or how Anna would have come up with this idea. _I promised myself I wouldn't care what Anna had planned as long as it didn't hurt Arendelle itself. So there._ "What if I blank? Or nobody shows up?" she asked. Elsa clasped her hands together, much as she used to do when she couldn't control her powers, but now it was just because she was really, really worried.

"You won't blank. I believe in you, and you should too," Anna said firmly. "And people will too show up. If anything, the children will convince their parents to come at the very least."

"I'm not even very good!" Elsa protested.

"Yes, you are. You sound pretty. I like hearing you sing, and so will everyone else," Anna told her in a voice that said there was no room for argument. "Their president wants you to sing their national anthem. Like, as a peace-showing thing. And you can sing your let-it-go song, and we'll see what else you'd want to pick from these songbooks."

Now Elsa just looked indignant. She lifted her chin and straightened her back, and for the first time in her life, Anna saw a slight trace of superiority in her sister's face. "I am not American. I am from Arendelle. That is an awfully presumptuous request. Especially after everything that has happened."

Anna was more than a little surprised at Elsa's reaction. "I didn't think it was any big deal. It's just a song…"

But Elsa held her ground. "It is _not_ 'just a song'. I might be old-fashioned, but it's just the principle of the thing. That is so rude." Elsa wasn't even sure why it made her so angry. She loved her country, and for some reason this felt like a subtle slight to Arendelle somehow. She was _not_ singing another country's national anthem at some concert she was being half-forced into doing. "It just feels…wrong," she said in a more agreeable tone. "I mean…I don't know. But I can't do that. And," Elsa added suddenly, "I actually think Papa would agree."

"Maybe you could sing ours too," Anna suggested. _I actually kind of get what Elsa's saying, but…_ "Then it would just look like we made an alliance or something."

Elsa seemed to relax at hearing this suggestion. "Okay. May I see the music, please?"

"Of course!" Anna quickly handed Elsa the music. "I looked at it already-it seems like a pretty song to me."

* * *

A few minutes later, Elsa discovered there was another reason she didn't want to sing that. It was hard, and Anna kept telling her that her accent was off, too. "No, Anna, this is not the same as me singing my 'let-it-go song', as you keep calling it! The next thing I know, you'll want me to translate that!" Elsa exclaimed.

Anna looked a bit sheepish. "Good grief, you're so good with translating stuff that yes, I did kind of think you might do that," she admitted.

Elsa sighed and ran her fingers through her hair in frustration. "It's not as simple as just translating the words exactly. There won't be the right number of syllables per line, and the meter will be off. I'd have to find other phrases that mean roughly the same thing that fit the melody. Translating songs is a big pain." You can't get mad at Anna. She got you home. You owe her…well, everything…

"Oh." Anna hadn't really thought about that before, but she knew Elsa was right. "Well, you don't have to translate it. They'll still enjoy the melody." She gave Elsa a hug and waited for her to start singing again. Anna loved getting to hear Elsa sing; usually the older girl would only do that when she thought no one was listening. Maybe that was one good thing about the concert thing, even if it was kind of selfish.

"Am I allowed to transpose this?" Elsa asked, frowning. "I don't like singing in this key."

"I don't see why not." Anna remembered something else she'd done, and flipped through her scribbled notes for the poems she'd found and written down. Maybe Elsa could make up music to them. "Could you come up with a melody to match some of these?"

Elsa looked much more interested all of a sudden. Writing-or at least making up-music was much more appealing to her than learning a song she didn't even particularly want to sing. "These are really pretty. I think I'd like to make up music for these anyways, concert or not. May I write on this?" Elsa asked, gesturing at the paper.

"Sure." Anna poked Elsa until she scooted over on the piano bench to make room for Anna.

Elsa began tapping out the meter and experimenting on the piano, humming the words to herself every so often. Rather than find staff paper, she carefully wrote in the chords above the words. Nobody else had to sing the melody besides herself, so she would just remember it and try to write it down later. Elsa knew actually writing out music was tedious and time-consuming. They didn't have time for that.

"Elsa, what's the six-threes and six-fours and four-twos and whatever else you're putting?" Anna asked.

"The chord inversions. Didn't Papa make you study music theory some?" Elsa showed Anna what the symbols and abbreviations meant by playing the chords on the piano. "See, six-three is first inversion. Six-four is second inversion. Four-two is a seventh chord in third inversion. That one's probably the hardest to remember-at least it is for me."

Anna shrugged. "I didn't like theory. It's boring. And you don't need chords as much on the violin. It was fun to play double-stops and chords sometimes though."

Elsa gave Anna a lopsided smile. "I like music theory. It's like math for music."

"Figures. Stinker."

"Stinker yourself!"

* * *

Daisy and the other children were dropped off in the courtyard just after lunch, much to Elsa's relief. Luckily they all seemed fine, although Anikka was very worried about something. She tugged Elsa's arm until the older girl followed her. "I lost Grand Pabbie's crystal thingie," she whispered nervously. "The others don't know 'bout it, neither."

"It's 'either', and a power crystal?" Elsa asked, not quite understanding. Why would Grand Pabbie have let Anikka and the other children take a power crystal with them into a foreign country where magic didn't seem to be accepted well?

"No, a…a magic exploder thing." Anikka paused, remembering what Grand Pabbie had told her. "Was s'posed to give it t' you if the 'time wasn't right' to set it off. I lost it!"

Elsa frowned and just picked the little girl up. The last thing they needed was for some weird magic explosive to go off or be found. They didn't even know exactly what Pabbie's troll magic explosive did. _Okay, Elsa, don't panic. Be logical._ The thing couldn't have been too dangerous or Grand Pabbie wouldn't have given it to little Anikka. "Where and when was the last time you saw or had it?"

"Last night. Before I went t' bed."

"And it was gone in the morning?" Elsa asked, just to clarify.

"Nooo, before I went t' bed," Anikka said.

"It was already missing before you went to bed? Why didn't you ask Kiara or any of the others to help you find it?"

"'Cause Kiara was already mad 'cause Grand Pabbie gave it t' me an' I was kinda mad too and showed it off," Anikka said, hiding her face in Elsa's shoulder. "Please don't be mad, Elsa."

Elsa bit her lip. "I'm not mad, Anikka. I'm _scared_ ," she said truthfully. "What if that policeman that was watching you all figured out that it was magic and took it when you weren't paying attention? What if it goes off by accident? If something else horrible happens that has anything remotely to do with magic, I think we all know I'll be blamed for it." _Elsa, be quiet. You'll scare Anikka and make her feel worse._

"But it's not ice magic," Anikka said, puzzled.

"No, but you're one of my country's citizens and I'm supposed to be responsible," Elsa told her. She didn't add that it was mostly just the idea of magic that put the blame on her, not the fact that she was the queen. "We'll just have to pay Grand Pabbie a visit. He can at least tell us what that thing he gave you will do if it is set off."

* * *

SEVERAL HOURS LATER…

"It is not an explosive in the way you think, Queen Elsa," Pabbie told a very worried Elsa once she had explained the problem. "It will not destroy anything, nor hurt anyone."

Elsa frowned. "What sort of explosive doesn't destroy anything? That doesn't make one bit of sense. What does it do?"

"It erases and alters memories on a major scale, but only those memories of non-mages and only about magic. It does not harm anyone. If you or Anikka had set it off while you were away, it also would have let me know to hide Arendelle from much of the world, much like your ancestor Ingrid had me do." Grand Pabbie sighed.

"Ingrid's ice-pane diary mentioned something similar. It also said this…cloaking procedure made all the trolls go to sleep until the next ice mage was born," Elsa said uncomfortably. _Why on earth would Grand Pabbie have given a thing like that to Anikka?_

"You are correct."

"Grand Pabbie, I don't mean to be accusatory or sound biased, but I haven't had the best outcome from troll advice in the past. This makes absolutely no sense to me whatsoever. Why on earth would you give something like that to a little girl to take into a foreign country that doesn't even believe in magic for the most part?!" Elsa felt very frustrated, and her tone matched that. She didn't feel scared anymore; she was mad. "I'm certainly no magic expert, but that's…that is just downright ridiculous and idiotic."

"To protect you," Pabbie said flatly.

"To protect me? Like my father protecting me by locking me away?" Elsa asked bitterly. She was tempted to just turn around and go home, but she knew that was just the angry bit of her talking. She needed more information if she wanted to fix this by herself. "If that's the case, why didn't you just 'hide' Arendelle and its neighbors long ago?" Elsa frowned and glanced down at her braced leg as she realized something else. "You could have done this last fall and Anna and I wouldn't have been left missing for six weeks. I wouldn't have hurt my leg. And you could have done it the second we knew those terrorists started going after magic. Et cetera. There is something odd going on here that is wrong and unfair to a lot of people, me included." _This is ridiculous! What else is going on that none of us know about?_ Elsa stepped backwards and held Anikka close, catching something she didn't like in the old rock troll's expression, but she didn't apologize for her words, either.

"You speak of things you neither know nor understand. Watch your words, girl."

Elsa flinched, but she didn't freak out or back down like her old self would have done. "Grand Pabbie, I'm sorry, but something is wrong. You are right-I do not know or understand. But I do know when something is wrong. I'd like to know _why_ you chose to do as you did," she said carefully. _Be careful, Elsa. You may be immune to troll magic, but Anikka and the rest of your country's citizens are not._

Grand Pabbie abruptly seemed to return to his usual demeanor. "Queen Elsa, do you really want us to meddle with human business every time something goes wrong? If I and the other trolls did that, no human would have his or her rightful memories, and also, there is only so much magic we have direct access to. You know the power crystals keep us alive, but if we use too much of our own magic, we fall into a deep sleep. You, as a natural mage, feel sick if you do the same. If you push past that, you will pass out. The further depleted your magic store is, the longer it will take to recover."

"So troll magic is like mine and Rapunzel's?" Elsa asked curiously. "How do you choose when to use your own magic, then?"

"It is not. Yours is elemental. Your cousin's is light-based. Elemental magic, especially fire and ice, is much, much stronger than any other. A light mage can be stronger than a purely elemental one, depending on how you look at it, but most light mages merely have a single facet of said category of magic. Princess Rapunzel heals, and she could learn to use it create light directly on a small scale, but she won't be able to use it for anything else." Pabbie paused, his instinctive reaction to Elsa's heated words having disappeared. "Elsa, I have seen many mages in my life, but very few masters. You must accept who you are- _all_ of you."

Elsa sighed. "I thought I did," she muttered. "I feel fine, much better than before."

"Queen Elsa, it is not so simple as what you are thinking. It is not accepting that you have magic, or that you still feel hurt sometimes, or that you have a weak leg. You have to accept what you call 'just plain Elsa' for who she is and actually love her, not tolerate her. You have to accept your dark side as well-and control it."

"Dark-me wanted to hurt people!" Elsa protested. "That is not me!" _But…that sounds like what Kristoff said. That I could use my dark side for good._

"Dark Elsa wants to be powerful so no one can ever say she is not good enough again. She knows she is powerful and embraces that. She is still hurting, and that pain makes her angry. Those things are not inherently evil," the old troll told her. "You are not willing to let your magic run free because you are frightened of what you are capable of."

Elsa stiffened and balled her hands into fists. "I came here to learn about that troll magic explosive, not whatever is wrong with the way I handle my magic," she said firmly. _I can't let my magic do whatever it wants to. Maybe when I'm alone on the North Mountain, but even then, I can't let it go freeze things thousands of miles away from me._

"Very well. Queen Elsa, one of the reasons I allowed Anikka to take that with her was something slightly selfish and simple on my part: at this point, you are strong enough to wake all the trolls up if I had cloaked Arendelle and its neighbors again."

"When Jade stole those power crystals and all the trolls became sick, I did revive all of you, but you said it was temporary, and besides that, I collapsed," Elsa remembered. "It sounds to me like this explosive thing would be on a much larger scale than that."

"You are stronger now, for one thing, and I did not say that doing such a thing would have no effect on you," Grand Pabbie said.

Anikka had been quiet the whole time, not really understanding the discussion, but now she spoke up. "I don't want Elsa t' do somethin' that's gonna hurt her," she stated, holding Elsa's hand tightly. "Not fair."

Elsa squeezed Anikka's hand back, partly to reassure herself and partly for Anikka. "Anikka has a point. I don't particularly want to do something that will hurt me either unless I absolutely have to," she said, trying to force a smile. "I'd do so if need be, but not unnecessarily."

"This would not be unnecessarily."

 _Yes, it would,_ Elsa couldn't help thinking. "Are you able to locate the explosive, or better yet, disable it somehow?" she asked finally.

"It is outside Arendelle."

Elsa's blue eyes grew sharp. "Grand Pabbie, please cease the word games. We don't have time for that. I know it is outside Arendelle, in the United States, to be specific! If you can disable it, please do so. Or I will figure out how on my own. Anna will help me." She stiffened, sensing something not quite right in her surroundings. _My magic knows something is wrong,_ she thought uncomfortably. On instinct, she pushed Anikka away and made an impenetrable ice bubble around her. A second later, Elsa felt the ground under her shift and split, like a fault during an earthquake might. _Arendelle doesn't have earthquakes. What is going on?_

In a second, Elsa had iced the ground immediately around her, her magic again sensing that something was not quite right, and not just because of the magically-induced earthquake, either. Something actually felt…bad beneath her. She stumbled but didn't fall. "Grand Pabbie, what are you trying to do?!" she demanded, frustrated. _I feel more confused now than before we came!_ Elsa found herself moving into her instinctive defensive stance, hands up, one foot forward, one foot back. Whatever the old troll had hidden in the Valley of the Living Rock was not good, and Elsa's magic knew it. It tingled in her bones.

"It is time," she heard Grand Pabbie's voice intone. Elsa noticed that all of the other trolls were sitting in a large circle around the valley in tiers, like she, Grand Pabbie, and Anikka were in the center of an arena.

"I don't understand!" Elsa wailed, looking down at the jagged mirror that seemed to have appeared out of nowhere. "What is that mirror thing?! That's what you were hiding? Is that why the magic earthquake happened?"

Anikka just looked at Elsa fearfully from inside her icy bubble of protection. "Elsa, I wanna go home," she whimpered. "That mirror thing is bad! It's like in that 'tory Niko read t' us, I just know it! Don't look in it!"

But Elsa had already done that. She tried to turn to Anikka, but realized she couldn't. The reflection in the mirror flickered and shimmered. She saw her normal present-day self, a happy little-girl Elsa, a frightened Elsa that was a bit older, a clearly depressed Elsa that seemed only a bit younger than her real self, an angry little-girl Elsa, a present-day Elsa in warrior gear that glared disdainfully at her, a smirking present-day Elsa sitting on an icy throne in her ice palace, and many, many others... _Wait a second…_ Real-Elsa narrowed her eyes at the flickering, changing Elsas in the mirror. _Anikka is right. There is something bad and…untrue here. Some of the mirror-Elsas represent moments that have never happened. What is this thing?_

The mirror Elsas seemed to settle on the two that disturbed their real counterpart the most: the final two. "Grand Pabbie," Elsa said, struggling to keep her voice calm, "please get rid of the mirror. It scares me, and I don't understand what's going on or what I'm supposed to do." The depressed mirror-Elsa blinked back at her; then flickered to the frightened young Elsa. _Elsa, calm down. Those Elsas aren't real. You know that._

"Only you can do that," Pabbie said. "You must fight the mirror, Elsa."

"Why?! You pulled it out!" Elsa shouted, balling her hands into fists.

Warrior-Elsa in the mirror flickered back.

"You may choose one ally," Grand Pabbie continued. "I do not know how many versions of you that you see, so you must do this on your own. You cannot, however, choose your normal self. Choose wisely."

"An ally for what, exactly?" Elsa scowled at the young frightened Elsa in the mirror. _I'll certainly not choose you_ , Elsa thought. _Or you_ , Elsa 'told' the depressed mirror-Elsa. _Actually, I do not like any of the Elsas I see except happy little-girl me. But I'm supposed to fight somehow. Little-girl me wouldn't have wanted to do that unless she was mad and trying to protect Anna_. "What exactly am I supposed to do?"

"You must defeat your virtual selves either in straight magic fights, or talk them down so they surrender-ie., join your side. They will merge to your normal self's reflection at that point. You may use both tactics at once if you choose," Pabbie said.

Elsa bit her lip. "What happens if I lose?" she asked quietly. The mirror-Elsa that she knew was from when Jade had trapped her in that cave flickered into view. _I've got to calm down. I'm freaking myself out._

"The troll magic explosive is set off."

"What?!"

But Grand Pabbie was quiet. A girl troll, Bulda, waddled up to him. "You're too hard on her. She's still just a human girl. You know she isn't an ice master yet," Bulda scolded. "Sure, she should practice with the mirror, but not with that on the line! It'll just stress her out. She can't fight if she's mad or scared."

"She needs to learn to do so. Not the fighting, but dealing with it." Grand Pabbie's rocky face crinkled into a smile. "Bulda, you need not worry. Queen Elsa may lose today, but she is powerful enough to help reverse our explosive if she chooses to. She also does not know that our explosive does not _have_ to be set off if she loses."

Bulda frowned as she watched Elsa, who was still staring into the mirror, her expression tense but clearly worried and a bit angry. "I remember the last time a natural mage fought the mirror. If Elsa loses, she's not going to be in any condition to assist in reversing that. She'll have to rest because her own magic will be all depleted. Pabbie, don't set it off. She'll be devastated."

Grand Pabbie said nothing. Bulda was technically right, but it also wouldn't take long for Elsa to recover, either-just a few days at most. He also knew about the concert thing, and he felt that it would not be a good idea for Elsa to do that. No, this was better.

Elsa tried to think carefully about what she was trying to do, even though she still didn't quite understand. If she was supposed to pick a single initial ally, but as she 'defeated' each reflection of herself, they would be her allies as well, she shouldn't pick the most helpful one at first. _I should pick the one that would be the most difficult to beat, then._ "I pick warrior-Elsa as my ally," she said shakily, unsure if she was doing what she was supposed to do. Almost instantly warrior-Elsa grinned at her, pleased, and she felt a pat on the shoulder. She shuddered and reached to touch the mirror. It felt like an ordinary mirror, although she also sensed the ancient and very strong magic within it as well. _This is so weird. And creepy._ "Grand Pabbie," she called, "what happens if I shoot ice towards the mirror? I don't want to make yet another mess."

"You will not make a mess. It does not work that way," Pabbie said, and went silent.

Elsa sighed. She did not trust the trolls one bit, not after this stunt. The happy little Elsa appeared in the mirror again, grinned, and began throwing snowballs at her. Real-Elsa jumped in surprise, but then laughed. "You're supposed to be on my side," she said aloud.

 _Really? Are you sure you want me?_

Elsa tensed. It was like her own inner voice; reflection-Elsa had not spoken aloud, and that disoriented her. She tilted her head to one side in confusion. _Yes, you're the only version of me I actually like_ , she thought.

Reflection-little-Elsa nodded, smiled happily, and melded into normal-Elsa's reflection.

Elsa bit her lip. This had less to do with fighting and more to do with dealing with her feelings. That was why that silly troll had made her do this, wasn't it? She sighed.

 **A/N: Okay, so I'll try to explain the mirror better. It's sort of like a prism in that it separates all of the facets-plus _possible_ versions- of the mage in question. So, for Elsa, a possible version of herself is the warrior ice mage. If Elsa had not realized that she would have to fight warrior-Elsa, it would have been near impossible for her to beat that reflection. Remember, Bulda is right: Elsa CAN'T beat the mirror at this point. She is not an ice master. She can come close, but she can't win. The mirror is a test for mages wanting to be masters. It has jagged edges for a reason that I will address next chapter.:)**

 **As for Grand Pabbie, yes, he's kind of being a pill. He's trying to teach Elsa more about her magic, and, as a troll, he doesn't quite understand Elsa completely, even though he's so old and has seen many humans. Just..wait.:)**

 **Next chapter coming soon, and we're gearing up for the ending:)**


	43. Chapter 43

**A/N: Thanks to everyone who's followed/favorited and/or is reading but not reviewing:)**

 **FluffyKitten-Glad you enjoyed it!:) Yeah, Elsa wasn't prepared for an interview and probably wouldn't do very well with it anyway, but I figured that was kind of inevitable.:P I tried to make it clear that Elsa is indeed okay-she just got, as you said, all emotional when she first got home. She's happy and relieved and grateful to be somewhere at least most people actually treat her like, you know, a human girl. And, of course, I tried to point out the little things she missed, like her pillows, for example.:P I have actually not read Harry Potter, lol. The mirror is slightly inspired by the mirror in the original fairy tale, but it's really quite different.:) Wait and see about the troll explosive...**

 **Elsa Tomago-Yep, everyone's out of that place now!:) Exactly-they just want to be together, it doesn't mean Elsa is all upset again. She and Anna just want to spend time together.:) We will see more of Emily!:) The mirror DOES NOT cast a spell on natural mages. I'll try to make it clearer in this chapter. I was trying to stick with what Elsa knows, mostly, which of course is very little. More about the mirror in this chapter, and I agree Pabbie should just leave Elsa alone. Part of the trouble is that the trolls don't understand humans very well (this should be clearer at the end of this chapter).**

 **Olivia O'Neil-Lol, it just kind of...happened. Had to have the last major "issue" before everything's a-okay at the end.:) Plus this is bringing a l-o-n-g plot device/story-verse-world issue that I've had in mind almost since I started the series full circle, with Ingrid and everything. We know already Ingrid was never an ice master, obviously, but I had to bring the troll explosive into play to force our MCs to investigate Arendelle's history quickly, and wrap up some other issues, too, regarding the trolls, natural mages, and the world all the characters live in. At this point Elsa cannot beat the mirror no matter what she does.**

 **IndyGirl89-The mirror in "my" storyverse is a nod to the original fairy tale, but it isn't the same.:)**

 **On to the story!**

 _I can't do this. I'm not ready-I need help. What would Anna do?_

 _Elsa, you can't panic. If you mess up, everyone else around you will be affected…badly. You can't give up._

 _I_ can't _do this! I'm not an ice master! I don't know what I'm doing and I'm scared._

 _Pay attention, Elsa. You have to stay on your toes, or you'll probably die._

 _I want to go home._

* * *

"Kristoff, Elsa said she and Anikka were just going to find out about some necklace Grand Pabbie had given Anikka that she lost," Anna said worriedly. "They should be back by now! Elsa just got back last night-I want her safe at home!"

Kristoff frowned. "Necklace? What necklace?"

"I don't know, Elsa didn't say. Something about a special crystal that was a troll weapon?" Anna shrugged. "I really don't know."

 _Grand Pabbie wouldn't have given_ that _to a little kid, would he?_ "Did she mention the word 'explosive' in any way?" Kristoff asked.

Anna figuratively froze. _Kristoff knows something_. "No, but she was being kind of evasive about it and wouldn't go into detail…" she trailed off.

"I think Elsa may need some help. If that 'necklace' is what I think it is, we need to find it. Before someone else does," Kristoff said in a worried tone. "If it gets set off, it could be very bad for all of us. If you'd be willing, take that girl Meri and Kiara on Linnae to wherever the little kids were staying in the United States. It's probably there. I'll go check on Elsa if you want me to."

"But I don't even know what to look for! And I want to make sure my big sister is all right," Anna protested. "It'll take you hours to get there with your wagon."

"Grand Pabbie won't hurt her. My English isn't anywhere near good enough to try to 'pass'. Yours is," Kristoff pointed out.

Anna bit her lip hard, trying to decide what to do. What if she got into trouble? Elsa would not be there to help. And she felt like something was very wrong, she wasn't sure why. _Maybe I'm just being paranoid._ "Ok. Fine. But you have to find Elsa and take super good care of her 'til I get back. Don't let her do anything stupid."

Kristoff raised one eyebrow. "I can't tell her what to do. She's the queen. And she's stubborn. Like you. If she believes she's doing the right thing, she won't change her mind no matter what I say. I don't particularly want to be turned into a popsicle."

"Oh, pooh! You know Elsa won't do any such thing. Well, she might, like, freeze your feet to the floor or drop snow on you or something, but that's it." Anna scowled as she realized just what else Kristoff had said. "I am not either stubborn!" she exclaimed indignantly.

Kristoff laughed and hugged a rather grumpy Anna close. "Being stubborn isn't a bad thing," he said firmly. Kristoff gave Anna a kiss, which she eagerly returned…

…and then giggled, knowing exactly what Elsa would say if she saw them right then. "Elsa would be all mad right this second and be like 'Anna, you have to wait!' or something," Anna said, still laughing. "And I bet her cheeks would be all red and she'd make that funny face she makes when she's irritated."

"We are engaged," Kristoff pointed out, but he knew Anna was right. Elsa wouldn't make them stop, but she would probably be a bit huffy about it, too.

Anna's giggles disappeared a moment later. "Kristoff, once we do get married-whenever that might be-will you mind if I still have sleepovers with Elsa sometimes?" Her blue-green eyes began welling with tears as she added, "I don't want her to think I'm abandoning her or something. I…I know that's part of the reason why she made a stink about, you know, us at first. She wouldn't say so, but she was scared of being left all alone…again."

Kristoff awkwardly stroked Anna's hair and just hugged her again. Anna's question hadn't exactly been out of nowhere, but it was still kind of…awkward to talk about, to say the least. While he had gotten used to being around the royal family, he still sometimes felt out of place or like he didn't belong. _Anna didn't have to ask that,_ he realized. _But she's actually…asking, all the same._ "You have sleepovers with Elsa as often as you want," he said quietly. "You know this part already, but…I don't love Elsa like I do you, but I do care about her. At first that was simply because she's your sister and I know you love her a great deal. I started caring about Elsa for just herself when we were all in the cellar during that big storm last summer. You had set up that mini surprise party, remember?"

Anna nodded. "Sure. Elsa loved it, too!"

"Yeah, but I also remember you gave her those silly lace gloves because you were trying to get her to associate the idea with something good, and-"

"And Elsa had a really bad panic attack instead," Anna muttered. _Elsa's so much better now. I'm so proud of her._

Kristoff sighed. "Yes, and I remember realizing that you two's parents must have treated her like crap or something. Or abandoned her, I didn't know. I didn't think that because she freaked out-I think anybody can get like that-but because of the actual why. And because, right after she felt ok again, she asked for you to hold her." He hesitated, not entirely sure how to explain. "Anna, the trolls took me in when I was a kid and I had nobody but Sven. When I realized I wasn't the only one-that somebody else had probably actually had it worse-it made me make a personal promise to myself. If I ever saw another kid in trouble, I was going to defend them. Because I can and because it's the right thing to do."

Anna plopped down on the grass under the tree in the gardens beside Kristoff and just leaned on his shoulder. She was quiet for a few seconds, not entirely sure what to say to that. Somehow it had never really sunk into her mind that Kristoff had once had a human family and that he hadn't always lived with the trolls. Kristoff never talked about his childhood before… _Before he was eight_ , Anna thought suddenly. "But Elsa isn't a kid," she said finally, although she knew that wasn't particularly helpful.

"No, but she may as well be. She's a genius eight- or nine-year-old stuck in a young adult's body. That's the way her feelings work, because she tried to get rid of them for so long. This sort of thing is why we need to get rid of Hans."

"She's not stupid!"

"Anna, she is far too nice. The fact that the guy isn't dead proves it. In any event, my point is just that while I have no attraction toward Elsa in…in that way, I do care about her, and I'll take as good care of her as I possibly can," Kristoff promised. "Come on, we should probably get moving."

Anna allowed Kristoff to help her to her feet and then abruptly scowled. "Are you sure you don't like-like Elsa? 'Cause she _is_ pretty," she said flatly.

Kristoff looked Anna right in the face, his brown eyes meeting her blue-green ones straight on. "Yes, I am completely sure. You're right, Elsa is pretty. I can recognize that without thinking of her that way. My eyes are only for you, I promise." He hugged Anna once more and gave her a kiss. "And if a guy ever tells you he can't see a pretty girl and keep his thoughts together, he is lying. If he really loves his partner, it will have no effect on him whatsoever. Seriously, Anna, you think Elsa is pretty. Do you like her like that?"

"Ew, no way, that's nasty!" Anna yelped, shuddering. "She's my sister! Good grief, that is so icky! Gross!"

"Well, she feels like a sibling to me, too," Kristoff pointed out. "So yes, that idea is very disgusting."

"Okay. That makes sense."

* * *

VALLEY OF THE LIVING ROCK…

"Grand Pabbie, don't you dare set that explosive off!" Kristoff shouted a few hours later. "Anna, Meri, and Kiara have gone to get it. It'll be fine." He glanced at Elsa, who was half-conscious, crumpled in front of the mirror but still trying to fight, and frowned. "And I thought that mirror was a legend! Get rid of it! I know darn well Elsa didn't want to do that!"

"Queen Elsa needs to be pushed. She does not seem to want to try on her own," Grand Pabbie said. "She is fine."

Kristoff shook his head. "I know y'all have tests for the young trolls to earn their own crystals and that's cool with everyone, but that" he pointed at Elsa and the mirror, "is NOT 'fine'. Elsa is a human, not a troll. She's crying and hurt." He paused, thinking of something else. "In the 'legend' of the mirror you yourself told me, the mage is able to admit defeat one he or she has gotten past a certain point and is physically unable to fight anymore. Why hasn't Elsa done that yet?" _I know Elsa wouldn't have voluntarily wanted to do that in the first place. What's going on?_

Bulda waddled up, her usually cheerful face twisted into a frown. "She thinks losing will make the troll magic explosive go off," she said quietly.

"Well then tell her the truth!" Kristoff exclaimed. "Grand Pabbie, I know Elsa. She's not going to give up if she believes that's on the line. You aren't really going to set it off, are you?" Kristoff glanced back at Elsa. I promised Anna I would take care of Elsa until she got back. What am I supposed to do?

Grand Pabbie nodded seriously. "It would be for the best. All those people outside Arendelle that treat magic like it does not exist and that it is science. Arendelle will be in danger once the next monarch takes the throne. Better if they have no memory of it at all."

"What about everyone else? That fire mage Elsa met? We all know magic is rare, but it's all over the world. There's no point in trying to hide it. We humans are curious. Somebody'll just rediscover it again," Kristoff pointed out. "Also, right now Anna and Kiara are looking for that explosive. They'll be affected. What is Elsa going to think when her sister and friend come back with no memory of magic? If they get back at all, considering they'll then be scared of Linnae since she's, you know, an ice dragon."

"I shall wait until they have returned, and make it so that it only affects those outside Arendelle's-and its immediate neighbors'-borders," Grand Pabbie said finally. "I do not want Queen Elsa doing that concert. I sense that something bad will come of it."

Kristoff sighed. "Grand Pabbie, I respect you a great deal, but I _really_ think that's a mistake. Elsa isn't going to be happy with you once she finds out the truth. She may not be vindictive, but she's not going to be any too eager to help wake all the trolls back up…" He jumped when a heard a sickening crack from Elsa's direction. The mirror was still standing, but a jagged crack zigzagged across one corner, frost from Elsa's ice hissing along the crack before being absorbed into the mirror. Elsa was curled up in front of the mirror, her hand still extended toward the mirror even though she had finally passed out. _Elsa must have come awfully close to beating the mirror…_

Grand Pabbie nodded in approval. "Next time Queen Elsa might win. The piece she cracked will be hers once she becomes an ice master."

Kristoff huffed in frustration and just ran over to Elsa as Grand Pabbie put the mirror back far underground where it belonged when no one was fighting it. He shook Elsa's shoulder gently, but she didn't respond. "Bulda, can you help her?" he called.

Bulda turned herself into a boulder and rolled over willingly, but she knew there wouldn't really be much anyone-human or troll-could do. "Elsa has to recover on her own, but we can try to help anyway." She frowned. "I have never seen someone as far from mastering their abilities as she is get that far," Bulda said quietly. "A half hour or so more, and she probably would have had her mirror piece in her hand. I imagine she was fighting the evil version of herself at the end there. Everyone has one, and they seem to be the hardest, because they will not only smack talk you verbally, they will pummel you fighting-wise as well."

"Will she be all right, you know, inside after this?" Kristoff asked.

"Sure. There was no one she cares about doing the smack talk. She may be terrified of attempting the mirror again, and be very angry at us trolls, but she'll be fine. Trust me." Bulda smiled reassuringly. "The test is designed that way on purpose, I think." She took off her own crystal necklace and put it around Elsa's neck. "There. We all know Elsa's magic rejects other magical intrusions, but she's so depleted magic-wise right now that that should help refresh it faster since those won't intrude on her magic directly. I shall be fine without it temporarily."

Kristoff frowned when Bulda began pulling Elsa toward one of the dugout troll homes. "Bulda, you used to do that to me when I was a kid. Humans don't like getting yanked around by the arm," he said carefully. "We aren't as sturdy as rock trolls."

Bulda actually just looked confused, and Kristoff shook his head. "Never mind. Where do you want her?" He carefully scooped Elsa up and put her down where Bulda showed him, on the soft moss in the dugout.

"You get Grand Pabbie and make Elsa some of our best tea," Bulda said as she tried to shoo Kristoff out. "I shall take care of her like she was mine to keep."

 _That's what I was worried about_ , Kristoff thought good-naturedly. He knew Bulda loved him and Sven 'like they were hers to keep', and she would still do things like trying to get him to dig tunnels like the trolls and the like. The trolls were family to him, but there were certain things they just didn't seem to understand. He jumped when Bulda flung something at him, saying he needed to fix it. "Bulda, please! I don't particularly want Grand Pabbie with Elsa right now, Elsa isn't going to like our tea, and I'm not meddling with her brace. It's hers!"

Bulda waved him away and pushed him out. "The metal is bent, and her leg is hurt. And whoever heard of not liking our tea?! It's delicious, and always helpful after a failed magic challenge. Get Grand Pabbie, Kristoff. Go on now."

"Bulda," Kristoff said patiently, "Elsa's leg was already 'hurt'. Please make sure the rest of her is all right."

"No, it's bent where it isn't supposed to be. One of her reflections, most likely her evil one, targeted her leg. I saw it. She has good defensive moves, but many of them won't work if her opponent can get through her impenetrable ice, which, of course, her own powers can." Bulda frowned. "She managed to copy something she saw her reflection do-turning into ice-but it wasn't enough because it wasn't the right thing to do just then."

Now Kristoff was just confused. "Turned into ice?"

Bulda nodded. "Yes, if you are fighting and wish to conceal yourself, if you are an elemental mage like Elsa, you can turn into the natural form of your magic. Rather like shapeshifting. But if you don't switch out of it quickly enough, you are in trouble. My guess is that her evil self's reflection tricked her into trying it. So once Elsa did that and took a hit while in that form, when she changed back she was left with an injury."

"Broken bones?" Kristoff asked, slightly horrified even though he wasn't surprised. Fighting that stupid mirror could kill someone if they refused to give up like Elsa had. _The one exception to mages being immune to their own magic, and it can kill them…_

"Oh, yes, but they won't take long to heal, especially for Elsa, considering how powerful her magic is. Just a couple weeks more or less," Bulda said, not particularly concerned. The idea of what could happen fighting the mirror didn't faze her at all; her issue was that Elsa hadn't done so voluntarily and the whole thing with letting her believe a major explosive would be set off if she lost…when it was literally impossible for her to win right now. "Now, out. I will take care of her."

* * *

Elsa woke up slowly. The first thing she remembered was that she had been fighting that awful mirror and just…collapsed. _I heard a crack right before I passed out._ Maybe _I beat it?_ she thought hopefully. She felt something uncomfortably warm on her neck and chest, and tried to reach to see what it was, but she couldn't move. _Where am I? I feel something soft under me. What happened? Did I mess up? And why can't I move?_ Elsa could feel herself beginning to breathe too fast; it was terrifying to her to be unable to move, she ached all over, and there was something wrong with her magic. It was still there, but it felt like…like trying to get the last drop of water out of a canteen or something. And her left leg _hurt_.

"You're safe, Elsa," she heard an unfamiliar but reassuring female voice say. "Don't worry about the mirror. It's over. Are you all right?"

 _No! No, I'm scared._ Elsa tried to get the word out, but it wasn't working. She struggled to open her eyes when she felt something rough gently lifting her head. _A troll? Am I still in the Valley of the Living Rock? Where's Anikka?_

"Kristoff made you some tea. It should help you feel better faster," the voice said.

"Might make your magic feel better, but you might think it tastes bad. It's an acquired taste," Elsa heard a different voice say. That voice was Kristoff's, she knew. She didn't know why he would have come to check on her, but she knew he wouldn't let anything happen to Anikka or her if he could help it. Elsa relaxed, but then coughed and gagged at the taste of the troll tea. _That is disgusting! How can the trolls or Kristoff, for that matter, drink that?!_

"I told you she wouldn't like it!" Kristoff said. "Come on, at least wait until she can drink it voluntarily. Give Elsa some water or something, and then I'm taking her back to the castle like I promised Anna I would."

 _Oh. So Anna sent him to get me. That makes sense._ Elsa felt cool water trickle down her throat, and she swallowed gratefully. A few more sips, and she found she could open her eyes with some effort. She was lying on some sort of soft mossy bed inside a dugout. It probably belonged to the girl troll that was trying to take care of her, she guessed. "Th…" she started to try to say 'thank you', but just that bit of movement had exhausted her enough that she felt like she might fall asleep right then.

Bulda smiled and patted Elsa's head a bit too hard, making the girl wince. "Good, you woke up! You're welcome," she said contentedly. "I'm Bulda. Just so you know, losing to the mirror does _not_ make that explosive go off. Also, you did lose, but you came very close to winning." Bulda saw Elsa's brow furrow, and she knew Elsa was probably angry, but at least she would know the truth. "Kristoff, I told the younger trolls to make it comfortable in the back of your wagon. You should take her and Anikka home. She should heal better somewhere she feels safe." That was definitely not in the Valley of the Living Rock.

"Anikka, you keep an eye on Elsa, all right?" Kristoff frowned as he glanced in the back of his wagon. True to Bulda's word, it looked rather comfortable and cozy in there now, a mixture of moss and all the blankets he usually kept there just in case. But parts of the way back were bumpy, and he was worried about jostling Elsa's leg.

"I keep Elsa safe," Anikka said proudly, and flopped down next to Elsa, her little arms hugging her tightly.

"All righty then…"

* * *

As Sven pulled the wagon back, Elsa felt herself beginning to wake up more, and she could stay conscious for a bit longer each time before dozing off or passing out again. Her leg still hurt-a lot-and her body was still achy and sick-feeling from her magic being so depleted, but she did feel better. At least she wasn't stuck in front of that horrible mirror trying to win an impossible battle because she thought losing meant that a world-changing explosive would be set off. It made her angry that Grand Pabbie had lied about that. _Why? What did he get out of it? Did he really want me to fight that mirror? Is it that important to the trolls that I try to become an ice master? That doesn't make any sense._

The dark night sky above her twinkled with stars, and Elsa contented herself with looking for constellations while she was awake. Kristoff would turn around every few minutes and ask Anikka if they were all right, and Anikka kept hugging her, even though she couldn't hug the little girl back yet.

By the time they finally got back to the castle, Elsa was deeply asleep, and Anikka had dozed off beside her. Kristoff unhitched Sven from the wagon and told him to watch the girls while he went and got help. "It's a long story," he told Gerda at the door. "Short version is that Elsa overdid it with her magic and she's completely exhausted."

Gerda frowned as she followed Kristoff outside. "What on earth was Miss Elsa doing that that happened?"

"There's a mirror to test natural mages for being masters, and Grand Pabbie kind of coerced her into fighting it…you can't beat it unless you are a master, and of course Elsa isn't, so…" Kristoff wasn't entirely sure how to explain. "They're both asleep."

"Well, give me Miss Elsa. I'll take her upstairs," Gerda started to say; then cut herself off when a cool breeze went by and Linnae landed with Anna, Meri, and Kiara on her back.

"Success!" Anna exclaimed, holding the troll magic explosive out to Gerda and Kristoff. "Kiara remembered what room they stayed in, and we just claimed to have accidentally left a fancy piece of jewelry behind. It worked, too! The stupid thing had fallen behind the headboard of one of the beds, it turned out, and…" She trailed off when she realized just what-no, _who_ -was in Kristoff's wagon. "Kristoff, what's happened to Elsa? You promised you'd take care of her!" In seconds she had handed the troll magic explosive to Gerda and scrambled up into the back of Kristoff's sled. "Elsa?"

Elsa blinked up at her and smiled a bit, but didn't move or try to say anything. _Anna's here. We must be at home now_ , she thought in relief.

"Are you all right?"

"Anna, she's exhausted and worn out magic-wise, and she's got a busted leg. Don't just-"

Anna quickly pulled Elsa close and picked her up.

"-pick her up," Kristoff finished. He sighed. Of course that was what Anna had done. At least Elsa didn't seem particularly perturbed; she'd let out a quiet pained yelp, but she didn't seem upset. Anikka still hadn't woken up. "It happened with magic, though-Elsa's magic-so Bulda told me it would heal in just a couple weeks, Anna," he added, trying to reassure her.

But Anna wasn't having it; she sent Kristoff a scathing look and marched inside with Elsa in her arms. " _You_ were s'posed to take care of her, and you let her be hurt," she said huffily.

Gerda shook her head. "Don't worry, Mr. Bjorgman. She's just worried about her sister, that's all. Come back tomorrow and I'm sure everything will be fine. I'll take little Anikka inside."

* * *

"An…Anna, I….I'm…f…fine," Elsa tried her best to reassure Anna, but she knew it probably wouldn't work, considering she could still barely talk. _That girl troll Bulda said me losing didn't automatically make the explosive go off,_ Elsa reminded herself. _It's okay. You can think about this tomorrow, Elsa. Just go to sleep..._ "Jus'…t…tired," she mumbled, her eyes drifting shut again as Anna helped her into bed.

"I can see that," Anna told her. She wanted to ask Elsa exactly what had happened, but it was clear Elsa couldn't do that tonight-she could barely talk. _Maybe she'll be better in the morning._ Anna gently slipped a pillow under Elsa's injured leg before climbing into bed next to her. Then she hopped out again, thinking that she'd probably move around and end up kicking Elsa or something. _But I want to stay with Elsa. I don't want her by herself._

"You…stay?" Elsa asked hopefully. "P…please?"

Anna frowned. So Elsa wasn't asleep. It just seemed like she was. "Elsa, I don't want to kick you or something. How about if I sleep in the big ol' comfy chair in the corner?" she offered.

Elsa's face scrunched up at that, clearly not happy with that suggestion. If Anna wasn't going to sleep in a proper bed, she wanted Anna to go sleep in her own room, then. She didn't want Anna sleeping in a chair because of her.

"Ok, what about this then…you stay there, well, you have to, but never mind that, I just mean I'll be right back," Anna said quickly. She ran off down the hall to her room and came back with an armful of more pillows. "Here…and here," Anna said, happy with her idea. "And here."

Elsa opened her eyes again and just watched curiously as Anna tucked enough pillows around her that she felt like she was in a cocoon of marshmallows. She still wasn't quite sure why Anna was so worried about hurting her, but she couldn't really bring herself to mind, either. Not after that horrible afternoon. Elsa was positive she had never used that much magic in her life, and the entire time she'd thought she had quite literally the entire world's memories on the line…and that had been a lie. When she thought about it now, it made her want to scream and throw icicles at something. _And I can't even do that_ , Elsa thought in frustration. _I went through all that trouble and hurt myself for absolutely nothing!_

"Much better," Anna decided. She pulled Elsa's hand out from the pillow cocoon and gave her a gentle squeeze. "G'night, Elsa."

"'Night, An…Anna."

* * *

Elsa woke up in the morning to Gerda trying to give her something to drink. "Miss Elsa, it's just water. I don't know if I'm thinking correctly, but you have ice magic. Ice is solid water. You need to help replace all the water you lost using so much magic yesterday," Gerda explained.

Elsa tried to take the cup herself, but her arms were too weak still, and she would have dropped it if Gerda hadn't been helping her. At least she didn't feel quite as achy and 'sick' as she had the night before, and she could move again, even if she still felt like a wet noodle. "Thank you."

"How's your leg feeling?" Gerda asked, searching Elsa's face for any sign that she was trying to hide how she really felt.

"Better, but…s…still hurts." That was the truth, even if she was kind of minimizing how much it hurt. Elsa knew she was safe around Anna and Gerda, so she felt calm now. Already she could feel her magic trying its best to refresh itself and the rest of her as well. _What am I going to do about that concert thing? I can barely talk right now, let alone sing and try to put on a show. And I don't even really know what I did to my leg, either._ "D'you know…what's…wrong with it…ex…exactly?" Elsa asked, hoping Gerda would know.

Gerda frowned. Elsa didn't know? Then again, she had been so tired the night before, so maybe it just hadn't quite registered to her. "It's broken, Miss Elsa, but I've been told that because magic did it, it'll heal in just a couple of weeks," she said carefully. She caught a glimpse of panic in Elsa's eyes and quickly added, "And don't you worry about that silly concert thing. It can either wait, or we'll figure something else out."

"Not in…two days," Elsa pointed out. Anna had explained what was supposed to happen; she and Anna should be in and out within less than twenty-four hours if everything went according to plan. Someone was supposed to come pick her and Anna up in two days, the concert would be that evening, and then they would go home. But even if the rest of her felt back to normal by then, her leg wouldn't be healed enough for her to try to put any weight on it.

"You'll have a mighty fine excuse for not dancing at your birthday party, Miss Elsa," Gerda said, trying to make Elsa laugh.

Elsa actually giggled at that. That was true. She still didn't want to have some big party at all, but at least she wouldn't have to bother with people trying to invite her to dance. Maybe she could get out of attending altogether. That would be good. Anna could socialize with everyone and everyone would be happy. Nobody would really miss her, would they? It wasn't like she was much of a conversationalist at such events anyway. Elsa bit her lip when she spotted her mother in the doorway. _Mama, please don't fuss over me_. Gerda might have been taking care of her, but she wasn't being all fussy, either.

"Is Elsa all right?" Idun asked Gerda. "I just heard part of what happened yesterday. Why didn't anyone tell me?"

"Oh, she's fine," Gerda said quickly, even though Elsa was not really 'fine' yet. "Mr. Bjorgman didn't bring Anikka and Miss Elsa back until late last night, and you had already retired for the evening. I thought it was better to simply let it be until morning."

"I wish to be informed of what is going on with my daughter." Idun was glad to see that Elsa didn't seem particularly upset; she looked tired, but that was it. At least it doesn't look like Elsa's frightened or something. She might be hurt-again-but she's all right. "What happened exactly, Elsa?"

Elsa scowled. "Grand Pabbie's inane…l…logic happened, that's…what," she said as forcefully as she could. She felt her exhausted magic stirring inside her weakly, and the sensation just made her feel all the more angry. Grand Pabbie might have meant well, but it wasn't fair. _I hate lying so much. And this was about something big, not just 'oh sure, I totally didn't eat the last piece of chocolate' or something._

Idun frowned and looked to Gerda for more information. "What is that supposed to mean? What did those trolls do to Elsa?"

Gerda sighed. "I think you may want to ask Miss Elsa to explain once she feels stronger, but from what I know, she was forced into fighting some kind of magic mirror, she lost because she's not an 'ice master', and it wore her out. I didn't quite understand. I'm not sure how a mirror could have physically injured her," she said.

Elsa gave Gerda a thank-you look, even though she really did not want to try to explain what had happened to her mother. The only person she intended to tell everything to was Anna. She squinted at one of the cuts on her arm from the afternoon before. _It looks way more healed than it should…it's almost gone_ , Elsa thought in surprise. She tentatively tried to make her snowflake in one hand, and while the snowflake appeared for a few seconds, she dropped her hand involuntarily, and the snowflake vanished. _Okay, not yet, Elsa. Try again later. It's okay, you're at home now._

"Miss Elsa, please don't try that yet. We want you to get better as quickly as possible, and that means you rest, magic included," Gerda told her. "I'll leave the water on your nightstand. There are a few sweet pastries for you and your sister whenever you want them here too, on this plate. I'll leave so you can rest."

"Okay."

* * *

That afternoon, Anna was playing chess with Elsa when they heard an unfamiliar knock on the doorframe. Anna instantly scowled and jumped up, toppling the chessboard. "Anna!" Elsa protested, trying to remember where their pieces had been.

But Anna was paying no attention. "What is _he_ doing up here?" Anna spat at the guard as she pointed at Hans. "Get him out of the castle at once, if you please!"

"Princess Anna, he was practically causing a mob at the castle gates. They want him out of Arendelle. I figured it was better to just let him in so he'd shut up and the people wouldn't be going crazy," the guard said apologetically. "He came up here without permission, and claims he wants to talk to the queen."

"Well, she isn't having visitors at the moment, and certainly not him. He has no right to be up here. Out, out, out!" To Hans, Anna added, "You are trespassing in private quarters. What makes you think you can just come waltzing up here and want to talk to my sister?"

"If he wishes to speak with me, he can do so from there," Elsa spoke up. She still felt too weak to try to get up, but at least she could talk again without tiring herself out. With both Anna and the guard there, she felt safe enough even though she couldn't really defend herself at the moment if need be. Elsa's blue eyes darkened as Hans stepped partway through the doorway. " _Out._ You do not put one toe in my room," she said quietly but firmly.

"I don't want to hurt you, E-Queen Elsa," Hans said, but he pulled his foot back.

"I don't care. It's my room."

Anna balled her hands into fists when Hans held out a small bouquet of flowers. "Hans, my sister does not need your stupid flowers. That's totally inappropriate!" she exclaimed.

Hans was unapologetic. "Kiara said she was hurt. Flowers are an acceptable get-well gift."

 _Not from you_ , Anna thought, but she knew Hans was technically right. Elsa would probably have loads and loads of flowers if everyone knew she was injured. "Whatever," she muttered.

"I daresay red roses are rarely used as get-well gifts," Elsa deadpanned. She paused, letting that statement stay in the air for a moment before continuing. "Hans, you know I cannot accept those. It wouldn't be fair to either you or me." _What do I say? This is so awkward. I don't want to be mean, but I just want him to go away…and stay away._

"Look, can't you give me a chance? I've changed, Elsa. I promise."

The guard gave Hans shoulder a rough shake. "Will you pay her proper respect?! You're lucky you get to speak with Queen Elsa!"

Elsa shook her head. "I gave you my final word on that, Hans. _No_. You had a chance, with Anna, and you wasted it. You hurt her. I've forgiven you for what you did to me, but I can't trust you. Please leave. You are dismissed." She looked to Anna and said, "Do you remember where your chess pieces were? Let's finish our game." There. That would make it clear that she was done with that conversation.

* * *

Anna quickly shut the door and went back over to Elsa; then thought Hans might come back and barge in or something and went to lock the door. "Elsa, I know you hate locking your door, but I don't want him trying to come back," she told Elsa.

"Why did he do that?" Elsa was looking down at her hands clasped in her lap, her pale cheeks pink in embarrassment about the whole thing. She wasn't even properly dressed, for goodness sakes. It wasn't like her blue nightgown showed anything inappropriate-technically it covered _more_ than her ice-dress did-but still. "He wanted to come _in my room_!"

"You know why, sis. The stupid guy likes you and doesn't want to accept 'no' for an answer," Anna said, hugging Elsa close. "Don't worry about it."

"And he saw me like this!"

Now Anna couldn't help giggling. "Good grief, Elsa, it's not like he could see anything, you stinker. You're all covered up. More than your ice-dress you like so much," Anna pointed out.

"But it's my nightgown! What if he gets mad at me and decides to tell people other…things were going on, just to get back at me for saying no?" She clasped her hands together nervously. Elsa _really_ did not want a rumor like that getting out. That would be horrible.

"Elsa, who's going to believe him? You have two witnesses-me and the guard-and besides, that guard also just said a ton of people were making a big stink and want him out of Arendelle entirely. If he claimed something like that they would probably think he, you know, forced himself on you or something, which wouldn't be your fault at all. And anyways, they'd probably lynch him, happily, too, if they had the chance." Anna frowned, noticing Elsa looked like she was getting tired again. "Maybe you ought to sleep some more. You're way better than last night, but you still need lots of rest, Elsa."

Elsa seemed to accept this and let Anna tuck the covers around her again, but then she spoke up again a few minutes later. "What do you think I'm supposed to do about that concert thing?"

"Postpone it, duh. Elsa, there's just no way you can do it 'til your leg heals. We'd probably be able to rig up something for you to lean on or something like that, but it'd hurt like crazy and make it worse. You seem way stronger than even this morning, but you also need more time to rest and take it easy, too." Anna reached and gave Elsa's hand a reassuring squeeze. "I think it's pretty cool how fast all these scratches and cuts are healing, sis. I wish I could do that."

Elsa laughed at that. "I think it's just because my own magic did it, in a way-my awful reflections in that mirror test thing. If it were some other powers, it wouldn't do that. Like when Emily accidentally burned my arm-it's healing, but not faster than normal, either." She paused before adding, "And it would be really rude of me to just not let their president know I cannot come as planned. I wouldn't be holding up my end of the deal. I…I don't want to have to go back to that lab place." _Elsa, just be quiet. Don't bother Anna with that_.

Anna made a face and crossed her arms. "Don't worry, Elsa, that is NOT going to happen. I'll make sure of it. And I know it's not really Kristoff's fault you got hurt, but I'm still mad about it all the same. Would…would you mind telling me what happened? I still don't quite get it. Silly ol' Grand Pabbie made you fight your own reflection in some mirror test thing?"

"Do you remember the troll-mirror in that fairy tale Papa read us when we were little?" Elsa asked quietly. She had been mulling this over practically all day, wondering how she was going to explain the whole thing to Anna. Anikka's warning not to look at it, that it was like the 'mirror in that 'tory Niko read t' us!' was probably the simplest way to explain it, even though the real mirror wasn't really the same.

"Yeah, but Grand Pabbie isn't evil like the troll in the story. And obviously the mirror didn't make you only see the bad in everything or whatever," Anna pointed out.

"Well, he has a powerful magic mirror to test natural mages for being masters that he keeps hidden far underground. Anna, it freaked me out. You know I don't like being powerful enough to do some of the things my magic can do, but I also did _not_ like being around magic that I could easily sense was far more powerful than mine." Elsa paused and bit her lip, trying to think how to explain herself. "When I looked in the mirror, there were all these different…versions of, well, me. Like a little eight-year-old me, teenage depressed me, lots of others from moments I know aren't true. I guess it's all meant to be the _possible_ facets of yourself, not just random moments that happened. I still don't quite understand it all myself, but it had just as much to do with accepting yourself as mastering your magic. You're allowed to talk to your reflection-selves, and it's just…odd." She shuddered, remembering how she had quite literally felt like she was fighting for her life against the evil Elsa's reflection. It had seemed to just go on and on. _I was in way over my head-I had absolutely no idea what I was doing_. "I collapsed before the evil Elsa even showed up," Elsa said softly. "If I hadn't believed everyone's memories were on the line, I…I would have given up. I just felt so exhausted."

"Considering that the test ended once you passed out, you could have given up, and it wouldn't have hurt anybody…" Anna's voice trailed off as she realized what that meant. Grand Pabbie had pretty much tricked Elsa into a situation that put her life in danger, simply because Elsa refused to give up since she'd thought everyone else was going to be affected. "Elsa, do you remember how your leg got hurt? Like when exactly it happened?"

Elsa nodded and bit her lip. "The evil-me did it. I'd already collapsed-I just couldn't stand up anymore. Evil-me had transformed herself into solid ice a few seconds before. I…I felt sort of panicked already, and I don't know what made me do it, but I tried the same thing, which was an inane move since I didn't know what I was doing. I heard-felt, thought, rather-'Just what I hoped you'd do, you pitiful thing. Why have you not surrendered yet? You know you're going to lose. You'll never be as powerful as me'. It was just all so…disorienting." She took a deep breath, her blue eyes clouded with angry tears. _I was so stupid. So…just stupid. I don't know what else to call it._ "The evil-me kept on talking, literally everything I've done or chosen to do is just wrong. She-it, I suppose-ended up saying something that I would never be able to defeat her because my leg puts me at a disadvantage. I can't remember the exact words.

"My mind was staying a few steps behind everything since I was already all worn out by that point, and by the time I processed that the evil-me was aiming at my leg, I couldn't block the attack or get out of ice-form or otherwise get out of the way in time. It felt like slow motion, like swimming in molasses or something like that. And then it took a few seconds for it to hurt, too. I can't really remember much after that, just flashes of things, and that I couldn't give up or lose because everyone else would pay for me being too weak to defeat that horrid mirror. Everything was all dizzy and spinning…" Elsa was visibly crying now, but she actually felt better telling Anna about it, even though she was tense all over again. She felt Anna's warm arms around her, helping her sit up and hugging her close, and she quickly relaxed, even though the movement had made sharp pain shoot up her broken leg. _I'm safe at home. Nobody's hurt...well, except me, and that doesn't matter. And nobody lost their memories, even though I lost. It's okay. Really._

"I'm sorry, Elsa, I didn't mean to make you cry," Anna apologized. She was more angry than anything about what had happened now after hearing Elsa's explanation. _Why did Grand Pabbie make Elsa do that? He had to have known she would react the way she did…_ Anna could tell Elsa wasn't really that upset-she seemed more worried about what could have happened than traumatized from what had really happened. Already Elsa was no longer crying; she was just slumped in Anna's arms, half asleep after giving her little speech to Anna. "Elsa…d'you realize it sounds like you were able to keep fighting and defending yourself after you collapsed, _sitting down_? I think that's pretty impressive, you know."

"Would have been better if that Grand Pabbie had told me the truth," Elsa mumbled sleepily. She was going to have some words with that dumb troll once she had recovered, so there. "Anna, when I get up, I'd like to read the rest of Ingrid's ice-diary panes. There is information in them that we should know, I'm positive."

* * *

While Elsa slept, Anna and Rapunzel fetched all of Ingrid's ice-diary panes from the attic and brought them down to Elsa's room. "I feel like there's some big mystery in our history in here," Anna told Rapunzel. "Elsa's right. We have to read these. Well, Elsa has to, anyways."

Rapunzel was about to reply when Kristoff came running toward them, clearly distraught about something. "Anna, you've got to get Elsa, quick! I was outside brushing Sven and we saw this eerie pink glow from the direction of the Valley of the Living Rock, and it's not going straight up into the sky-it's coming toward, like, Arendelle proper. I think Grand Pabbie is setting off that troll magic explosive. If it gets here before we figure out what to do, we're all in trouble…except Rapunzel and Elsa."

Anna frowned. "What do you think Elsa's going to be able to do? She's better, but she's still all worn out, and what about her leg?"

"I don't know, but I do know she's the only one that might be able to reverse it. Get her to numb her leg with her magic or something. She can't walk on it anyway. We need Elsa!" Kristoff finally just pushed past the incredulous princesses and knocked loudly on Elsa's door before walking in. Ordinarily he would never, ever go in there without express permission, but these were extenuating circumstances. "Elsa, Queen Elsa? We all need your help."

* * *

"No, Elsa, Bulda told you the truth," Kristoff said firmly when Elsa's immediate response to hearing what was going on was that it was her fault for losing. "This is NOT because you lost to that mirror. Grand Pabbie is _choosing_ to set the explosive off. It isn't your fault."

Elsa wasn't sure what she could do; she did feel much, much better than before, and she managed to numb her leg with her magic, but just that one thing seemed to tire her out again. How then could she try to stop Grand Pabbie's explosive? "Anna, I want you to go with Kristoff, find Gerda and Kai and have them shut all the castle windows and seal any openings you can find anywhere. _Stay indoors._ Maybe that will help. Rapunzel, since the two of us are safe, we'll have to be the ones to try to actually do something about this. We can ride Linnae." She took a deep breath, trying to calm herself down. _Don't think about what might happen, Elsa. Just…don't. And don't incite panic, either. Wait second…_ "Anna, where's that little necklace Grand Pabbie gave to Anikka? You said you gave it to Gerda."

"She said she put it in the pocket of one of those heavy winter dresses you never wear anymore so's nobody would find it," Anna said.

Elsa started to try to get up, only for Rapunzel to push her back against the pillows. "Rapunzel, let me up. We might be able to use that thing to stop what Grand Pabbie is doing!" she protested.

"Yeah and even if he does it won't _hurt_ anyone. You getting up hurts someone-you! I know you made it so your leg didn't hurt anymore with your magic, but you still can't walk on it," Rapunzel said firmly. "Let Anna find it. And…see, there it is." She quickly handed the small reddish-pink crystal necklace to Elsa.

Unfortunately there were no hints as to what Elsa or anyone could do with it to stop what Grand Pabbie was doing, other than the fact that the thing was glowing and shaking. Elsa balled her hands into fists and scrunched her eyes shut. Kristoff and Anna had left to do what she'd told them to do, leaving her and Rapunzel alone. _I'm scared. What am I supposed to do?_ If her magic felt replenished to full strength, she would just try encasing the crystal in ice, but she wasn't sure she could even do that. _Wait a minute…Grand Pabbie mentioned something that I was strong enough to help wake all the trolls up if that explosive was set off. Well, I quite honestly can't bring myself to want to do that, but if I can do that, then I should be able to stop the explosive in the first place if my magic wasn't all tired out. But ice magic isn't anything like troll magic. Rapunzel's magic should help, too. If we could get Emily here… So…_ "I think I have an idea, but I need to ask Kristoff something since he knows some things about magic. Rapunzel, could I bother you to take me downstairs?"

* * *

But Kristoff frowned and shook his head when Elsa explained her logic. "I don't think Rapunzel's healing magic will help. We need more elemental-based magic to counter Grand Pabbie's. Or rather, more magic that can be actively used as offense rather than defense. That fire mage Emily could certainly help, though."

Elsa bit her lip and closed her eyes, forcing herself to stay calm so she could think. She didn't really know Emily, but she couldn't really think of another option, either. Emily was a natural mage like her. Linnae would be able to contact Emily, then. _But Linnae sending Emily a message will probably just freak her out. I know it would freak me out…_ "I'm going to ask Linnae to send Emily a message. Perhaps she will come help. If not, we're no worse off than before anyways," Elsa said finally.

 **A/N: Okay, so, hopefully the mirror makes more sense now. I tried writing more of Elsa actually fighting the mirror, but it was unintelligible even to me, and I wrote it. Since it was mostly based in Elsa's thoughts and yet not, it just didn't make sense. And of course, as it went on, things weren't clear to her, either, so... So you guys get Elsa's explanation of her experience to Anna instead.:)**

 **Yes, Arendelle's citizens REALLY don't like Hans and want him gone.:P And yes, he likes Elsa, and no, she will never, EVER have anything to do with him.**

 **So Elsa is kind of out of commission at the moment since she can't walk and her magic is all depleted, but she's on the right track with her ideas...we shall see if they work.:)**

 **Next chapter coming soon!**


	44. Chapter 44

**A/N: Thanks to everyone who's followed/favorited and/or is reading but not reviewing!:)**

 **Elsa Tomago, raven678, IndyGirl89-I PMed you, so I won't make you reread the same thing here!**

 **FluffyKitten-Yep, I should:P Same here. It kind of irritated me a bit that Kristoff and Elsa didn't seem to get along all that well on Once Upon a Time-it's two years after the Thaw there and I would've thought they'd be more brother and sister by that point. Well, OUAT Elsa had the bossy big sister part down pat, haha. XD No, you're right, Anna's 'ew, that's gross!' comment was a not-very-subtle poke at how ridiculously stupid that pairing is. They're SISTERS, thank you very much. If Pabbie had done what he did to someone else that wasn't as willing to put themselves in danger for others, it wouldn't have been so bad, but Elsa just freaked and pushed herself and her magic way too far. The trolls sort of need Elsa to become a master, but not really. She's very powerful, even for a natural mage, and Pabbie knows there are other mages out there that aren't so nice. The trolls aren't going to tell Elsa or any other human this, but Elsa could protect them if need be. Although, she's going to be frustrated and angry with them now, so... Nope, Hans has no chance whatsoever with Elsa.:P**

 **Olivia O'Neil-Ingrid's diary doesn't show up yet...I was planning to cover that this chapter, but it got too long, so that's next chapter. I think there will be two more chapters after this one. I think.:)**

 **GeekGirl2-Just keep in mind the trolls don't understand humans completely.:P And yes, you have a point, they certainly didn't thank Elsa very well for what she did for them before...**

 **On to the story! (By the way, I've bumped the rating up to T, which I probably should have done ages ago, but something almost happens this chapter that _definitely_ bumps the rating up, so. T now.:))**

 _The girl Emily is frightened. She thinks she is imagining things_ , Linnae 'told' Elsa. _She has replied but does not understand that she did so._

"Tell Emily that you're the dragon that carried Rapunzel and me home across the water," Elsa said quickly. She and Rapunzel were sitting on the steps leading to the front door of the castle. "That was probably all over their television device things." She instinctively bit at a fingernail, hoping beyond hope that Emily would understand and be willing to come…and if she did agree, that the fire mage would get to Arendelle in time to help. Because Elsa's magic was still depleted, she didn't dare try to send Linnae to get Emily and come back, because she wouldn't be able to message Linnae very well. Even receiving Linnae's messages when the dragon was right in front of her was using bits of magic she couldn't afford to use. Elsa could feel her injured leg starting to hurt again; the magic she'd used to numb it was wearing off, and that worried her. "Wait…Linnae, tell Rapunzel your replies from now on, not me. Then Rapunzel can just tell me verbally." There. That would help.

Linnae nodded agreeably and nuzzled Elsa's shoulder.

"Linnae says that Emily said, 'I think I understand now, but how can I get there? Planes do not fly to Arendelle'," Rapunzel told Elsa.

Elsa sighed and closed her eyes. "Emily is like me. She can use her own air currents to get here. Tell her you'll meet her partway, Linnae."

 _I shall not have a fire mage ride me! I do not wish to melt!_ came Linnae's indignant reply. The dragon turned around and flicked her tail at Elsa, clearly huffy.

"I told you to send Rapunzel your replies, Linnae," Elsa scolded. "And Emily clearly can control her magic. She's not going to hurt you. She's just a girl…like me." Elsa looked down at her pale hands clasped in her lap, thinking of Emily's dark skin. Even though she knew it was a ridiculous thing to think of right that second, Elsa thought she wished _she_ had dark skin like Emily's. Emily probably never got sunburned!

"Linnae says she'll go, but only if you come too," Rapunzel informed Elsa. "She also says that Emily says she doesn't want to have to rely on her air currents to get around."

Elsa frowned and glanced at her broken leg awkwardly stretched in front of her. There was no way she would be able to ride Linnae, and quite honestly, she still felt too weak to trust herself to actually hold on in the first place. And she didn't want to leave Arendelle if there was the remote chance she could do something to help. _Calm down, Elsa. You can't panic. Emily is willing to help…she's just hesitant, and that's completely understandable._

"Elsa, Emily is willing to come and Linnae is willing to go to get her if Linnae brings me along," Rapunzel said after a minute, giving her worried cousin's arm a reassuring squeeze. "I know you don't want to leave Arendelle."

Elsa shook her head and then nodded, but she didn't say anything. _I'm useless right now. Why did Grand Pabbie do what he did? Did he make me fight the mirror on purpose because he knew I wouldn't be strong enough to do anything to stop him afterwards? Arendelle is my country; it's_ my _job to protect it. And I can't do a thing._

 _And if everyone loses their memories of magic, Anna won't want you anymore once she finds out about your powers, Elsa._

 _Shut up. Even if that happened, Anna wouldn't do that. She'd probably just be really, really surprised-again-and wouldn't mind at all._

The tears didn't fall until Rapunzel and Linnae were out of sight.

* * *

"We did everything you said, Elsa!" Anna said as she ran outside a minute later. She figured Rapunzel and Linnae had gone to get help since Elsa was sitting on the steps by herself, but that didn't explain why Elsa seemed so upset. Maybe the stress of everything had finally gotten to her. That was probably it. Anna wordlessly picked Elsa up and just carried her back inside. Elsa didn't make a fuss; she buried her face in her little sister's shoulder.

But she did stop crying.

"Kristoff said that whoever's in possession of that weird crystal thing Pabbie gave to Anikka will be able to keep their memories even if the explosive reaches them," Anna said quietly. "You know, so's if Anikka had set it off, she would have been safe." She showed Elsa the glowing crystal hanging around her neck. "He said I should be the one to hold on to it. For you."

Elsa didn't smile, but she couldn't deny that that somehow made her feel better…much better. Then she felt bad because she thought that was kind of selfish on her part.

"Everybody scrunched into the cellar-or the wine cellar-'cept me, the bad guys still in the dungeon, and a few of the guards. They all understand what might happen, though," Anna told her. "I thought everyone might be safer there. I also sent a dozen guards to tell everyone to get indoors and remain there 'til you or I say it's safe."

Olaf waddled up to the sisters and plopped down beside them. "I am safe, Elsa. We should link everyone together with magic," he said matter-of-factly. "Elsa, you love everyone." The little snowman stared up at Elsa earnestly, a hundred percent sure that depleted magic or not, Elsa could still help because she loved her people.

 _Link everyone together with magic…? What's that supposed to mean?_ "Olaf, I don't understand. I can't share my magic. Especially right now-I don't have access to any to share, even if I knew how. I can barely make my snowflake," Elsa said quietly.

Anna slipped her hand into Elsa's. Despite the fact that Elsa's magic was still badly depleted, her hand was still cooler than usual, and Anna hugged her tightly. "Don't be scared, Elsa. We'll all be fine, I just know it."

Elsa suddenly tried to stand up, and Anna held her still. "Anna, stop it! I…I've got an idea! My…m-my magic water! I have bottles and bottles of it hidden in the dungeon! Maybe not enough for everyone, but we have to try!" For the first time since she had found out that the stupid troll explosive had been set off, Elsa let herself have a bit of hope that everything really would turn out okay. She just had to get to her people that lived closest to the troll valley first, and dose as many people as possible with her magic water before Emily got back with Rapunzel and Linnae. Maybe, with help, she could actually do this.

* * *

A few minutes later, Anna was in front of the old dungeon cell with Elsa and Olaf. "Door's locked and I don't see the key," she told Elsa.

Elsa's blue eyes twinkled. "The key is inside. I froze the door shut on the inside so nobody could get in." _Now melt the barrier, Elsa. You can do it._ Elsa took a deep breath and held out shaky hands, trying to dissolve the ice barrier on the other side of the door. "Try…try it now," she whispered after a moment. Quite honestly, Elsa felt like she might pass out again, but she shook her head hard and managed to stay awake.

Anna gasped in amazement when she pushed the door open with her foot. This was the first time she'd seen this place since Elsa had redecorated her old place of confinement. The cell-aside from the door-was completely unrecognizable. Delicate, pretty, translucent, filmy icy curtains even hid the barred window. The entire cell sparkled. It looked as if Elsa had made this place into a cozy room to retreat to-and experiment in. Anna noticed some odd-looking ice things in one corner laden with thin wires and other tiny things; they almost looked like some sort of electrical thing like she'd seen months ago in that underground hideout. She carefully set Elsa down on the snow-covered 'bed' that previously had just been a slab of stone, trying to be extra careful of her broken leg. "Good grief, Elsa, this looks like you've been experimenting down here," Anna commented.

Elsa just gave Anna a lopsided smile. She would explain what she'd done to this place later. "Bottles are in th' corner," she said, trying to point. "Please…please hurry."

"All right, I see 'em, Elsa," Anna said quickly. "You want to ride out towards the homes closest to the troll valley first, right?"

Elsa nodded. "But…but leave me here," she said softly. "Just…just a burden." _Stop it, Elsa. Stop feeling bad for yourself like that. You're helping. But carrying you with her will not help Anna get the magic water to the people. So you stay behind. Now get yourself together._

Anna glanced from the bottles of water to Elsa and back again. She knew Elsa was right, that taking Elsa with her would only slow her down, but she just didn't want to leave Elsa behind. _I've got to be logical. That's what Elsa would want me to do._ "Ok," she said finally. Anna gave Elsa one last hug before pulling the ice-cart filled with bottles of magic water towards the door. "Olaf, you stay with Elsa."

"I'll be fine," Elsa told her sister, trying her best to sit up straight and look stronger than she felt. "I'll…I'll try t' make more while…while you're gone. Since that…that won't be…be enough for everyone, I don't think…"

* * *

It wasn't until Elsa heard suspicious noises from down the corridor about ten minutes later that Elsa realized she should have asked Anna to take her to either the actual cellar or the wine cellar with everyone else. But Elsa's focus had been on trying to help everyone else, and it had simply not crossed her mind to go hide with the others. Now she and Olaf were in the most remote part of the castle with several criminals only a few doors away, ones that would probably _love_ to hurt her. And there were no guards down here now, and she couldn't defend herself. Elsa glared at the single bottle of water she'd managed to make. That had used up the last bit of energy she had. Try as she might, Elsa just couldn't get her magic to do anything now but make a few tiny snowflakes, and she felt like her senses weren't quite as sharp as they should be.

"We're going to have visitors," Olaf said cheerfully. "They look happy," he added, peeking out into the corridor. His usual happy-go-lucky expression vanished when he saw the sneer on one of the men's faces. Those people were bad, and they were after Elsa. Olaf ran over to Elsa as fast as his stubby legs would carry him and tugged at her arm. "Elsa, Elsa, the visitors are happy, but not for nice things!" he blurted.

Elsa could feel herself shaking all over, but she didn't cry. _I have to hold it together-I have to think. And fast._ "Olaf, just…just shut the door," she whispered. She tried to sit up and only made it halfway before collapsing on her back. _I will not give those people the satisfaction of panicking. I won't._ Olaf wouldn't be able to hold that door shut for more than a few seconds at best. If only she could just freeze the stupid door shut! _Maybe I can…?_ Elsa closed her eyes and concentrated as hard as she could on summoning ice to simply block that door. She felt her magic doing its best to do what she wanted, but when she opened her eyes, she could easily both sense and feel that the ice now on the door was too thin and weak to do much good. _Just like you, Elsa,_ she thought to herself.

 _I'm just postponing the inevitable. They are going to get in here and even if I try, I won't even be able to scream for help. I have to think of something else._ Elsa bit her lip and glanced around the small cell-now-turned-room. There had to be something in here she and Olaf could use. Already she could hear angry voices and something slamming against the door. She probably only had seconds to think of what to do. The pieces of the tossed-aside failed circuit and computer project she'd been experimenting with (with help from one of the books she and Kai had bought previously) didn't work, but one could be a good shield if she could hold on to it. _Which I can't-I'd probably just drop it because I'm too weak to do anything._ The bag of books could knock someone out if it hit them in the head just right, but again, she wouldn't be able to do that.

The ice on the door cracked ominously.

 _Anna would try to talk out of it,_ Elsa thought frantically. From the words she could hear, she could tell they didn't 'just' want to kill her…they wanted to hurt her. _I need help, and fast. Linnae, please hurry._

An instant later, Linnae's message shot back: _Elsa, we are coming as fast as we can. Is something else wrong? You sound terrified._

 _I am terrified!_ Elsa struggled to control her own breathing as she messaged Linnae one last time. _Not enough magic to reply again. Went to castle dungeon; gave Anna something to help others. Left. Can't defend myself-bad people after me. Need help n-_

Linnae felt Elsa's message abruptly cut off, and she flapped her wings and flew even faster, Rapunzel and Emily clinging to her back. _Elsa needs our help. She and Anna were working on something to help everyone else. She is in the castle dungeon_ , Linnae 'told' Rapunzel. _She says there are 'bad people' after her. Elsa's message cut off after that._

Rapunzel quickly relayed that information to Emily, who just bit her lip and flicked a few of her beaded braids out of her face. "Linnae, don't worry about us hanging on. Fly faster," Emily said urgently. Although she really didn't know Elsa well, she knew quite well what the ice mage's cryptic message most likely meant. If Elsa's magic was depleted, she not only wouldn't be able to access her ice much, if at all…she also would be too weak physically to try to do much to defend herself the way any ordinary person would. Goodness knew Emily had purposely done that with her own fire magic multiple times in an effort to increase her internal magic 'store' for next time, much to her brother's frustration. She could just hear his voice now, ' _Emily, you can't do that! If someone realizes what you have…And I don't have time to take care of you afterwards. Just be our heating system in the winter, all right?_ ' Emily had a feeling that there was more to her abilities than she knew, especially now that she'd met the literal opposite of herself, right down to the way she and Elsa looked.

She wondered if Elsa had an identifying mark on the back of her neck the way she did. Emily could remember the first time she'd seen it in a mirror reflection, a tiny, nearly imperceptible flame that she knew represented her magic, no matter what her brother said about it just being a birthmark. Maybe it _was_ a birthmark, one that represented her powers! Emily decided she hoped Elsa had one too, maybe a snowflake.

* * *

ARENDELLE

 _Olaf is getting help. Olaf is getting help_ , Elsa told herself. The second the door had flown open, Olaf had shouted to Elsa that he was getting help, somehow knowing that he and Elsa were not going to be able to take care of things themselves. Elsa had nodded and continued sending her message to Linnae; then been easily knocked to the floor, her concentration on the message abruptly cut off. If she could just keep these men talking until help arrived, everything would be fine. _What do I say? I know Anna would start babbling to confuse them, but…I don't know what to do._ Elsa knew she probably looked a terrified mess crumpled on the floor, and that also made her angry. Weak or not, she was determined not to let these people know how frightened she really was. "Get out of here," Elsa ordered in the strongest voice she could muster. "Or I'll…I'll sic my…my dragon on you."

She received a kick in the leg for her efforts. Elsa instinctively yelped in pain, but she didn't cry.

"We know that freaky creature of yours is nowhere near here. You and your sister talked a lot, you know," one said meaningfully.

"We just want to have some fun with you after you put us down here and rescued that princess-Anna, is it?" said another.

"You know Anna's name quite…quite well already," Elsa replied disdainfully, struggling to hide the tremor in her voice. _They know there's no one coming for me until Olaf gets back_ , Elsa thought. _I've got to do something myself. But what? What am I supposed to do? Conceal, don't feel. Now would be a good time to do that, Elsa. Don't let them know you're scared._

When one stepped closer, close enough to touch, she stuck out her arm, making the man trip and fall. Elsa struggled to sit up and just scooted backwards on instinct, unsure what to do. They laughed when she simply collapsed on her back again, and Elsa wished she could just throw them all in the fjord. Not kill them, just make them think there were sharks in the water or something, even though she knew quite well that there were not. _I can't do a thing. I wish Linnae or Anna or someone would get down here now. I'm scared. I can't get up and run; I can't even do what Kristoff told Anna and me to do if we ever got in this situation._

Elsa spotted her failed computer-circuit experiment just out of reach, and a new idea came to her. It would hurt her leg, but if she could just curl up underneath and inside one of the boxy looking pieces right next to her, maybe she could hide like that until help came. _I just have to get one of them to kick it over. It'll fall right where I want it._ Before she could say or do anything, Elsa felt painful pressure on her hands, and she struggled to pull herself free. She could feel tears filling her eyes, and she tried to blink them away. _I am_ not _going to make them happy by letting them see me cry. I won't. I won't cry even if nobody comes_ , she promised herself. _And you can't give up, Elsa. Anna would want you to fight with everything you've got unless you're unconscious. You know that._ With that thought, Elsa managed to hook her good leg around one of the icy pieces of her experiment, and it landed directly across one of the men's feet, knocking another over in the process.

Pain flashed across her face a second later, but this time it just seemed to give her a bit more strength, and she let her body grow deathly cold all over, not nearly as much as if she'd done that when her magic was at full strength, but it was enough to make the one pinning her hands let go. _Please hurry up_ , Elsa thought desperately. Once they recovered, they were going to be even more angry than they were before.

The last thing Elsa knew was something pressed to her neck, choking her.

* * *

It was really only less than fifteen seconds later when Kristoff and several guards rushed in, Olaf trailing behind them. "Get your hands off her!" Kristoff yelled. While the guards secured the others, Kristoff went after the one that had been practically on top of poor Elsa. Kristoff knew they had gotten there in time before any of them had managed to really do anything, but right then he didn't care. He slammed the man against the wall and easily held him there, choking him the same way the guy had been doing to Elsa. "You like how that feels?" Kristoff practically growled. "Can't handle her when she's at full power, so you go after her when she's down. Absolutely despicable!"

When the man began begging for Kristoff to let him go, Kristoff did just that and then punched him as hard as he could. "That's for hitting the queen. You leave her and every other girl you meet alone," he ordered. He was tempted to beat him-and the others-up some more, just to show them how it felt when you weren't the stronger party in a fight, but decided he wouldn't stoop to their level. Kristoff awkwardly apologized to the guards and then just stared in surprise around the cell-turned-room. Elsa might have been nearly completely out of commission, but she had obviously put up a fight. There was splintered ice around the door, evidence of Elsa's weak barrier breaking, and now that he was thinking about it, even when he had first gotten there, one of the men had had his feet pinned in place and had been trying to get the ice Elsa had knocked onto him off.

"Where should we take Queen Elsa?" one of the guards asked Kristoff.

Kristoff sighed and tried to think what Anna or Elsa would want him to do. "I don't know. She needs a doctor. I guess we can take her back to the cellar?" he suggested awkwardly, not entirely understanding why one of the guards would ask him such a thing.

"Elsa wants t…to make sure you are all…all safe," Elsa deadpanned. Her voice sounded raspy, and it hurt to talk, but she managed a genuine smile. She turned red when she realized her dress was hanging off one shoulder, and she tried to pull it back where it belonged. "I…I…I'm sorry," she whispered; then her eyes fluttered shut again.

"They didn't do anything," Kristoff said quickly. "Promise. You defended yourself enough until help arrived." He just nodded when one of the guards came back to say the criminals were re-secured in their cell, now chained, and the key was NOT within reach now. Then he carefully scooped Elsa up. She let out a quiet pained sound but didn't wake up completely. "Let's just go back to the cellar…cellars."

* * *

Gerda actually smiled once she'd heard what had happened and seen Elsa. "That silly ice-dress of hers is what saved her! The fabric won't rip," she said, gently stroking Elsa's hair. "Those horrible people couldn't get it off." She frowned when Elsa reached for her own throat, as if she were trying to get hands that weren't there to let go. "Miss Elsa, you're safe. I know it's probably sore, but nobody's choking you anymore."

Elsa recognized Gerda's voice and tried to relax, but her throat hurt, her hands hurt, and her leg hurt. And something on her shoulder stung. _I'm safe. Olaf brought help back in time. It's okay. I was useless to help stop the explosive anyway. It doesn't matter._ She opened her eyes to see Gerda sitting beside her and Anikka just staring at her, her brown eyes wide. "I'm…I'm okay," Elsa told Anikka.

"Don't talk. I told Mr. Bjorgman to get Dr. Raske from the wine cellar, Miss Elsa. We'll get you taken care of, and when your cousin gets back, she can heal most of it," Gerda said gently.

"No, th…the 'splosive, have to…t-to stop it. Need…need all the magic…" Elsa winced and had to stop talking, but she actually felt better and more alert now. She involuntarily flinched when Linnae sent her an unexpected message: _We are here, Elsa. You would not reply! Are you all right?_

 _I am fine_ , Elsa managed to reply, but she knew she was not going to be able to send her dragon any more messages right then. She wondered if Anna was doing okay with the magic water distribution, and if that stupid explosive had reached them yet. If it had, then their precautions of blocking off all openings and hiding out in the cellars were working.

"All right, after that, then," Gerda told Elsa. She really wanted to just pick Elsa up and hold her tight, but she didn't want to risk hurting her further. All Gerda could think of was what would have inevitably happened if Elsa hadn't managed to keep her wits together.

"I have to help Rapunzel and Emily," Elsa whispered matter-of-factly, so quietly Gerda could barely hear her. _I have a tiny bit of magic still left I can use, I know I do._

"Miss Elsa, you can't. You can barely move. You've done everything you possibly could," Gerda said firmly. She could see tears filling Elsa's worried blue eyes, and she wasn't sure what to say to make Elsa feel better. It was clear the young queen wasn't panicking, but she was very upset all the same. And knowing Elsa, she was definitely not crying from pain, either.

"I wanna help!"

Gerda finally just gently pulled Elsa close when she began trying to get up and push Dr. Raske away. "Miss Elsa, you listen to me. You cannot go help your friends stop that explosive. You cannot get up by yourself. You're not strong enough right now," she told Elsa, looking her right in the eyes. "None of us want you hurting yourself worse. You did your job already. And stop talking. I'll not have you hurting yourself somehow."

Elsa seemed to completely deflate, and she didn't try to protest any further, about trying to help or anything else. Deep inside she knew Gerda was right, but she still just wanted to help all the same. And she just didn't want Dr. Raske anywhere near her, if she was completely honest with herself. _Stop it, Elsa. Dr. Raske isn't going to hurt you. He just wants to help._

 _I know. I still don't want him near me. So there. But I'm not going to make a fuss. I'm okay._

* * *

"What do you mean, why do I have beads in my hair?" Emily asked Anna slightly indignantly. "Because I want to, same as why you do whatever you like with your hair. And never mind that, what do I need to do?" Linnae had spotted Anna giving out the magic water and landed since she knew Elsa was all right; Anna had immediately asked about Emily's beaded braids, which Emily had taken slight offense to, but she knew the princess hadn't meant anything by it.

"I don't know! You're the natural fire mage-I was hoping you would know," Anna said hesitantly. The eerie pink glow was directly overhead now, mixing with the sunset, and heading downwards and toward the fjord. If they didn't do something, it would get outside Arendelle. Giving each citizen only a few drops of Elsa's magic water meant that Anna had managed-with some word of mouth help-to get at least most of Arendelle's people immune to the troll magic bearing down on them. But unless they did something fast, everyone outside Arendelle would be in trouble. "Rapunzel, take Linnae to Corona and tell everyone to get indoors and seal everything up, like Elsa had everyone at the castle do," Anna said suddenly. "Your mom is still there, even if Uncle Thomas is here. But Linnae, take me and Emily to the troll valley first."

Rapunzel went pale in fright, but she nodded and climbed back on the ice dragon's back.

"And Netta, you make sure everyone here gets indoors," Anna added, pushing the ice-cart toward her. "I know Elsa would trust you, so I will, too."

Netta blushed and dropped a curtsy, but she nodded seriously. "Of course, Princess Anna. I shall do as you say."

* * *

VALLEY OF THE LIVING ROCK

Even though she knew she would get in trouble for it, Bulda had stubbornly rolled herself into a boulder, refusing to help Pabbie with the explosive. She could not stop him from setting it off, but she would not help with it, either. All she could think of was everything she knew the royal sisters had done over the last year. And Elsa, struggling to beat that mirror when she knew she physically couldn't. And Anna saving her sister's life out on the fjord the summer before. Maybe the rest of the world shouldn't know about magic, but Arendelle should. Corona, too. And, by extension, their immediate neighbors, too. Bulda unrolled when she sensed more magic in the valley. There was Elsa's ice dragon, Princess Anna, Princess Rapunzel, and another girl Bulda didn't recognize. The only thing Bulda could sense about the other girl was that she had magic of her own. _Fire powers,_ Bulda thought in surprise. _And she's near Elsa's age._

Also, Anna had the troll explosive crystal necklace Grand Pabbie had originally given to Anikka. Bulda grinned. The girls had figured out that the necklace protected its holder, probably from Kristoff, Bulda guessed. "I cannot stop him but I shall not help," she told Anna earnestly.

Anna smiled slightly and nodded. "Can you tell us what Emily can do to stop it? She's a natural fire mage, so Elsa and I thought she could help." Anna thought about Elsa sitting in that redecorated cell all alone with Olaf and hoped she was all right, and tried to push those thoughts away. Elsa had to be ok. She just had to.

Bulda glanced at Emily and then Rapunzel. "Those two can both help. Rapunzel less so, but she can still help. You'll need every bit of magic you have," she said seriously. "You must be directly in the way. Emily, you shoot fire directly at our troll magic. Preferably pure fire magic, not just fire, but mere fire will still help. Rapunzel, you hold your hands out and sing, as I know you do not know how to do anything else. It will not hurt, but you'll quickly become tired. Don't give up until every bit of the pink from our magic vanishes," Bulda said quickly. "Anna, you and Linnae return to the castle. It isn't safe for either of you here, Linnae because she's a life construct and you because you are not a mage. Go home and take care of your sister. I don't have anywhere near the abilities Grand Pabbie does, but I do know she needs you. She's frightened about something. I'm pretty sure she is all right, though."

"Pretty sure? Not a hundred percent sure?" Anna asked worriedly.

"I'm sorry, Anna," Bulda said quietly. "I don't know anything else. Come back for your friends in two hours or so. It will be over one way or the other by then."

* * *

BACK AT THE CASTLE…

Anna took Linnae into the castle and asked her to block the entrance while she slipped into the cellar. After seeing clear signs of some sort of fight in Elsa's little experiment-and-retreat room in the dungeon, she was terrified someone had kidnapped Elsa and taken her somewhere, but after having Linnae frighten one of the criminals into telling her what had happened, Anna knew where Elsa was.

And then they had all stared blankly at her a minute later as pink wisps of troll magic filtered through the barred cell window, stuttering that dragons didn't exist. The troll magic had affected them, and Anna, because of the necklace, still had her real memories.

Now Anna slipped into the cellar, not knowing what she would find. To her surprise, everyone was just fine memory-wise. Elsa's quick thinking to hide everyone and seal openings if at all possible had worked. Anna was fairly certain that the only places in the castle that were unsafe were the dungeon and attic, most likely. But Elsa herself was definitely not fine; she looked a bit frightened, just like Bulda had said, and she was hurt. Anna was fairly sure she recognized signs that somebody had been trying to choke her-there were bruises and scratch marks on Elsa's neck. _I wish I hadn't left Elsa alone. This is my fault. I should've made her come down here before I left with the magic water._

"Anna," Elsa said happily when she spotted her little sister, despite the definite instructions from both Gerda and Dr. Raske that she shouldn't talk for awhile. All of a sudden she felt more cozy in the cellar than trapped, even though it was cramped. Nobody down here wanted to hurt her, and if Anna was back then the water must have worked. Now they all just had to wait it out. Elsa wanted to give Anna a hug, but she didn't, keeping her hands hidden under the blanket Gerda had draped over her. _I'm not telling Anna exactly what happened. With any luck I'll just ask Rapunzel to fix me before Anna ever sees what else is wrong with me._

"She's not supposed to talk," Gerda said firmly, giving Elsa a pointed look.

Anna didn't care; she just wanted to make sure Elsa felt safe and get that frightened expression off her face. She plopped down next to Elsa, took the blanket Gerda handed her, and just curled up beside Elsa, tossing one arm around her.

Elsa bit her lip and moved her hands away, but she said nothing. She was not going to tell Anna any of it. She just wouldn't.

"You're hurt worse than you're letting on," Anna said abruptly, narrowing her eyes at Elsa. "What did those horrid creeps do to you?"

Elsa pretended she was asleep.

Anna scowled, knowing quite well that Elsa was not either asleep.

"They wanted to, you know…do things," Kristoff whispered in Anna's ear. "But they didn't. I laid one of them out and Elsa herself did put up a fight." He ignored the angry look Elsa was giving him. "You know Anna would've made you tell eventually," Kristoff pointed out.

A tiny nod from Elsa. She knew that was true, but she still didn't want to even think about it anymore. If she'd just been able to throw up a strong ice barrier, something insanely easy for her when she wasn't so weak and tired, the whole thing wouldn't have been a problem at all. _Good grief, I could have easily fought all of them by myself if I had to, if my magic wasn't all worn out._

"They still hurt her," Anna muttered angrily. She was suddenly very glad those people had lost their memories of magic. Served them right. "And Rapunzel will probably be tired, just like Elsa, when she and Emily get back. She won't be able to heal Elsa."

"She will in a day or so, Anna, maybe even tomorrow. Elsa will be fine-she's strong. She wasn't even bawling or freaking out or anything when the guards and I got to her after Olaf told us what was going on," Kristoff said.

Now Elsa actually smiled a bit. "That's 'cause I wasn't conscious," she deadpanned in a raspy whisper. "Trust me, I was _terrified_."

"Nope, you hadn't been bawling or freaking out before that," Kristoff told her seriously. "I know you weren't. You might've been scared, but you kept your head. And I know you'd been fighting back as much as you could."

Elsa just looked completely confused. "How d'you know?"

"Well, for one thing, there was a big piece of ice on one guy's feet. There was also a broken ice barrier around the door. Those scratch marks on your neck are from you trying to get choking hands away. You probably scratched the stupid guy up too. One was complaining you tripped him. And the one I punched was fussing that you'd made yourself cold or something." Kristoff's brown eyes sparkled devilishly as he added, "They're big cowards and scared of you. When you are back to normal, I say you ought to go down there and scare them some more."

"They also lost their memories of magic, so that would a double good idea," Anna said with great satisfaction. She carefully helped Elsa sit up, keeping her arm around the older girl's shoulders. Anna frowned when she saw Elsa's hands, but she didn't say anything, even when Elsa hid them under the blanket.

"She already saw 'em, Elsa," Kristoff said quietly. "Those scumbags should be the embarrassed ones, not you."

Elsa just bit her lip. It didn't matter right that minute since she couldn't use her magic much anyway until it replenished itself, but she still hated things on her hands and wrists all the same. She knew whoever had gone after her had probably pinned her hands on purpose just in case she could use her magic on them-and because theoretically she couldn't fight back if they were hurt-but somehow it still bothered her. Why had those men wanted to do that anyway? Were they _that_ angry at her? "Maybe it's my fault," she whispered finally.

Anna made a face and just held Elsa closer. "Why on earth would you think such a thing?!"

"My ice-dress." Elsa dipped her head, her cheeks red in embarrassment. She could feel tears filling her eyes, and she didn't try to make them go away. Anna and Kristoff wouldn't pick on her; she knew they wouldn't.

"That dress of yours is what saved you," Gerda jumped in. "It won't rip and therefore won't come off. Why do you think there are all those marks on your shoulder? Besides, Miss Elsa, people like that would have tried such despicable things no matter what you were wearing. You could've been wearing an ugly sack and it wouldn't matter. And stop talking, please. I'll not have you hurting yourself."

Now that Gerda had pointed it out, Elsa did remember her dress hanging off her shoulder and trying to pull it back where it belonged. She pressed herself closer to Anna. Anna would hold her and Anna wouldn't let anyone hurt her any more. Elsa was suddenly very, very glad that her mother had ended up hiding out in the wine cellar, not in here. She couldn't deal with anyone being all fussy right then. Elsa was very glad everyone else in the cellar wasn't bothering her. _I know it's probably because they don't know what to say, but I'm glad all the same._

Anna smiled when Elsa finally began to relax. She knew the older girl was just falling asleep, but she was delighted that Elsa felt safe and calm enough to do that. They stayed right where they were until it was time for Anna to go back to the Valley of the Living Rock to get Rapunzel and Emily.

* * *

"Elsa, no, you can't come! You're hurt," Anna said again when it was time for her to go get the other mages at the troll valley. "Stay here with Gerda and everyone else. I'll be right back. I promise."

"But I feel better now," Elsa protested. Her throat was still sore, but she felt quite a bit stronger-she could easily sit up by herself now-and even if it did hurt, she could talk without making herself tired.

"You can't use your magic and you have a broken leg and Linnae can't carry four older girls," Anna said firmly. "You stay here. Anikka, you have my permission to sit on her if she tries to leave," she added, only half teasing.

Anikka unsuccessfully stifled a giggle. "I not want t' sit on Elsa. Might hurt."

Elsa sighed, knowing Anna was right. Quite honestly, her leg hurt an awful lot, more than it had in the first place. She hadn't screamed or anything when Dr. Raske reset it, but she had kind of maybe cried…just a teeny bit. Elsa was very glad Anna had not been there. And she was positive that it hadn't just been her leg that hurt; her magic did too. It was trying to help mend her, she just knew it. "Just hurry back," she said after a moment.

Anna hugged her one last time before leaving. "I will. I promise."

Elsa refused to sleep until Linnae had returned with Anna, Emily, and Rapunzel, and she gazed at the cellar door hopefully when she heard it open. Sure enough, there was Anna, and she was grinning. "We're back! I helped Rapunzel and Emily upstairs already. They're really, really exhausted, but the stupid explosive is gone. I think Netta and some of our other citizens realized what your water does, Elsa, 'cause they also helped. I also talked to Bulda for a few seconds-she says we defeated the explosive, but Arendelle and its neighbors are cloaked from the rest of the world. But," she paused before finishing, "everyone-including those outside the magic cloak bubble thing-still have their memories. We did it, Elsa. We really, really did it." She hugged Elsa close. _And everyone's at least sort of all right_ , Anna thought, thinking of Elsa's injuries and how utterly exhausted Emily and Rapunzel were. _We'll just have to rest and stuff for a couple days._

"The United States flying machine won't be able to find us," Elsa pointed out, but even Elsa couldn't keep from smiling. That they could deal with. Probably mages like her and Emily could get in and out, just not anyone else.

"I already thought of that on the way back from the Valley of the Living Rock. We can send a written message. Linnae can deliver it. If they don't believe the message, then they'll be the ones stupidly coming to look for Arendelle and they won't be able to, and then they'll have to believe it," Anna explained. "Then, once you're all better, you can pay them a visit yourself and follow through with the concert."

"That…actually sounds good," Elsa said hesitantly. I know what I'm doing while I get better. I'm going to read Ingrid's ice-pane diary. "Let's go upstairs."

* * *

Nobody woke up early the next morning, not even Elsa. There were soft rays of sunlight shining into Elsa's room when she woke up, and she was delighted to find that her magic felt much, much better from a good night's sleep. It still wasn't quite back to normal, but Elsa knew if her hands and wrist weren't injured, she would easily be able to do whatever she wanted with her magic as long as she didn't overdo it. As it was, she couldn't help closing her eyes and letting the ice flow to her fingertips. It tingled pleasantly, cool and refreshing, even though she didn't try to let it out, knowing it would just hurt.

Elsa felt whole again. That awful sensation of her magic being depleted so much that her stomach hurt and she felt like there was a piece of her missing was gone. _I am never letting that happen again. Never, ever._

She smiled.

Just as an experiment, Elsa stayed still and just concentrated hard, staring at a single spot above her on the ceiling. A sloppy swirl of ice crackled there and then turned to frost before turning back to ice. Elsa frowned. That had not been what she wanted. She wasn't good at purely using only her thoughts to direct her magic, and the raw and inexperienced appearance of what had shown up on the ceiling proved that. The awkward ice swirl did, however, disappear when she closed her eyes and willed it to.

Elsa began giggling a minute later when she tried to make it snow on the snoring Anna beside her. "I'm sorry, Anna, I didn't mean to do that," she apologized.

Anna huffed and sneezed sleepily as she threw the pile of powdery snow back on Elsa, who quite honestly did not look very sorry at all. "Stinker! What was that for?!" Anna protested. Then, all of a sudden she remembered everything from the day before, and she bolted upright. Elsa was hurt and the night before she still hadn't been strong enough to do much of anything with her magic. Even if Elsa felt stronger now magic-wise, Anna knew both of her sister's hands were injured, too. And Anna had just thrown all that snow on her. "Oh, good grief, Elsa, I'm so sorry! I don't know how you did that in the first place, but-"

"Anna, it's fine," Elsa interrupted, awkwardly managing to swipe the snow out of her face with a bandaged hand. "I'm okay." It still hurt some to talk, and she knew her voice still sounded funny, but Elsa was so happy that her magic was at least mostly replenished that she didn't care. Besides, they had managed to stop that stupid troll magic explosive. Yes, Elsa was quite contented at the moment. Her blue eyes twinkled mischievously as another pile of snow dropped right on Anna's head, this time entirely on purpose.

"Elsa!" Anna yelped. "It's cold! Quit that!"

Elsa only grinned at her. "Make me, then."

"I can't, and you know it," Anna protested. If Elsa hadn't been hurt, Anna would probably just sit on her and tickle her until she begged for mercy, but obviously Anna was not going to do that now.

Elsa's smile just grew wider. She knew quite well that Anna wasn't going to do a thing, no matter if she dumped a hundred piles of snow on her.

"You quit that! You are enjoying this far too much," Anna informed her grumpily, but she really wasn't that mad, even though she was scowling. _I don't like Elsa teasing me, but at least she's happy, and she obviously feels better, too._ When Elsa's smile abruptly vanished, Anna tried to backtrack. "Never mind, I just…I don't know. I don't like being woken up to snow being dumped on me, but I'm glad you're happy."

The smile didn't reappear. "I'm sorry." Elsa hadn't wanted to make Anna mad at her. Before she could make herself any more upset about that, she felt Anna helping her sit up and just hugging her. Anna wouldn't hug her if she was mad.

"Don't apologize. Just…don't. Elsa, I'm not mad at you. I promise. Please don't make yourself all upset again." Anna gently pushed her sister's hands away when Elsa tried to hug her back. "You're still hurt, sis, so just sit still. I'll go get us something to eat. I'm starving." She paused before adding, "And quit talking, too."

"I still sound funny, don't I?" Elsa frowned as she gestured at her throat. "It still hurts, too." She shuddered, remembering how she had felt just before blacking out. _I was probably shaking, I was so scared. I know those men didn't…do anything, but I still feel…I don't know. I'm being stupid. Nothing happened._

Anna gave Elsa's arm a reassuring squeeze, not liking that frightened, disgusted expression on Elsa's face. "It just sounds like you've been sick or something," she said quietly, although she was somehow quite sure that a raspy voice was not what was really bothering Elsa. "What's really wrong?"

Elsa just looked down at herself, then glanced at Anna, her blue eyes filled with tears. "I feel dirty. I'm not stupid, Anna. I know what they were after. What did I do? Why?" _I must have done something. I can't believe that they were that mad at me to make them be like that._

"Kristoff told me they didn't do anything?" Anna hesitantly reached for Elsa and just pulled her close. Elsa wasn't shaking or otherwise panicking, but she was cold, and she seemed very…little all of a sudden. Anna didn't say anything else, waiting for Elsa to answer.

"They didn't," Elsa confirmed a few seconds later.

 _Thank goodness. I don't know what I would do otherwise_ , Anna thought. "Elsa, you didn't 'do' anything. It's _not_ your fault those creeps went after you like that," she said firmly. "You know why they went after you. It's because you stopped them from hurting me before."

"I can't even _have_ a baby!"

Anna's expression darkened, and she suddenly just wanted to go down to the dungeon and beat up every single one of those…those horrid she-didn't-know-whats. Did Elsa seriously think that those men had wanted a baby? _She can't possibly think that. She just doesn't understand why else they would want to hurt her like that_ , Anna realized. "Elsa, I'll sit here and listen as long as you need me to, but you're _not_ 'dirty'. I get why you feel like that, but you didn't do anything wrong. I shouldn't have left you alone with just Olaf in the first place. And the key to their cell shouldn't have been left where they could figure out how to get it."

Elsa didn't say anything right away, but she seemed to relax, and she wasn't so cold for Anna to hold anymore. _I know Anna is right. But I still feel all weird about it._ "Thank you for not saying I was being dumb or something," she whispered.

Anna just hugged her tighter in response and said nothing. Elsa would be fine. She just needed someone to keep telling her that she hadn't done anything wrong. After all, just before their serious discussion, Elsa had been clearly happy dumping snow on her little sister.

* * *

"Rapunzel, it'll just make you have to rest even longer," Elsa protested just after lunchtime. "I can wait."

Rapunzel shook her head. "No, I told Dad to bring you in here so I could heal you," she said firmly. "I can't heal your leg, but the rest of it I can."

Elsa looked to Uncle Thomas for help, but he shook his head. "Elsa, Rapunzel and I discussed this before I brought you in here. It's obvious that magic replenishes itself much faster than you're going to heal naturally. It won't cause my daughter pain to rest and sleep a bit longer. You, on the other hand, are hurting whether you tell anyone or not."

"I'm okay. Really," Elsa insisted again. _I know how depleted magic feels. It feels awful. I don't want Rapunzel making herself feel like that more just because of me._

As if she were reading her cousin's thoughts, Rapunzel said, "My magic isn't anywhere near as depleted as yours was. Also I won't need much magic to heal you, either." She hesitated before adding, "Elsa, after the whole mess with the explosive was over yesterday, I'm convinced you could have really, _really_ hurt yourself and made yourself sick forcing yourself to do what you did with your magic. Mine might work different since it isn't elemental like yours or Emily's, but…I don't know. My magic just…up and quit after awhile. I still felt it, but I couldn't force it out. Elsa," she said again, "you were risking your life with that mirror. Your magic knows your body's limits. I'm 99.9999% sure you pushed way past that."

Elsa was quiet as Uncle Thomas gently set her down beside her cousin. _I had to. I just…I couldn't let everyone else pay just because I was too weak to help._ "I thought I had to save everyone," she whispered.

"You forget that you have value too, Elsa," Thomas said quietly. "I won't pretend to know how your or anyone else's magic works, but nobody would have blamed you if you had quit fighting sooner. In general a queen shouldn't have to fight herself in the first place."

Elsa looked indignant. "I had to do my best! I love Arendelle, and it's _my_ job to protect my country!"

Thomas looked Elsa right in the eyes. "Yes, Elsa, it is, but you also have a country full of people that love you, not just as their queen. They love _you_ , too. Not just the mature, dignified queen you try to show them at all times, but the sweet young girl they know was abused as a child. Do you really think that no one would have supported and helped you right away, and not as a last-ditch effort like it ended up being? I left the castle earlier today to see how everyone was faring. And you know what I heard over and over? 'Why didn't Queen Elsa ask us for help sooner? We would have been at her side instantly!' They really love you, Elsa. I do, however, admire and understand how you're willing to sacrifice everything for your people."

"They're not angry because now they're all stuck with water powers temporarily?" Elsa just hung her head, not quite believing what her uncle was telling her. Her country's citizens couldn't possibly love her after all the trouble since her coronation. At least when her daddy had been king, Arendelle had been a peaceful, sleepy country. Now, with her as reigning monarch, Arendelle was suddenly thrust into all kinds of problems, all because of her magic.

"On the contrary, they are fascinated, and delighted that they helped stop that troll explosive. I heard many people wanting to know if you were all right. Many of them are looking forward to seeing you at your birthday party. Now please let Rapunzel heal you."

Elsa sat quietly and didn't make any more fuss, and she was glad to see that while her cousin did look tired afterward, she was still alert and didn't look like she felt sick or anything. Elsa hugged Rapunzel tightly and just said thank-you before eagerly making her signature snowflake first in one hand, then the other. Then she tentatively touched her throat and smiled when it didn't hurt anymore. "I don't sound like a frog anymore," she announced happily.

Thomas hugged his niece and daughter close.

 **A/N: Okay, now you know why I bumped the rating up, even though Elsa is okay. I tried to focus on Elsa herself and her thoughts, nothing else. I'm sure everyone knows this already, but the reason they went after her is exactly what Anna said: because she stopped them from hurting Anna a bunch of chapters ago. And, by the way, yes, it's possible to black out in as little as ten seconds if somebody chokes you a certain way.**

 **See, Elsa's emergency magic water came in handy!^_^ Yes, she intended them to be for far in the future originally, but they needed it. So she'll just have to make a new store of it.:)**

 **Next chapter: Ingrid's diary (finally) , and Elsa and Emily experiment with their magic a bit, among other things.:)**


	45. Chapter 45

**A/N: Thanks to everyone who's followed/favorited and/or is reading but not reviewing:)**

 **Elsa Tomago & Olivia O'Neil-I PMed you so I won't make you reread the same thing here:)**

 **FluffyKitten-Yes, I agree-that's really scary for Elsa, because it'd make her feel very alone all over again.:/ Nope, impossible, unless...well, let's just say a crazy rabbit-hole thing that would involve a LOT of trouble and be quite costly:P Elsa might be scared the first time she goes back to her remodeled cell-room, but the incident won't ruin it for her, either:) Thank you, Kristoff is the most difficult of the main Frozen canon characters for me to write, so that means a lot.:) Ah, yeah, I felt I really had to bump the rating up, even though Elsa is okay.:P Too clear what would have happened if Elsa had panicked or no one came to help in time.:/**

 **badbloodkiller1-Yep, the kids too:) I'll touch on the 'everyone now has water powers temporarily' thing next chapter:)**

 **IndyGirl89-I'll be closing a few loose ends this chapter.:) Pabbie made a huge mistake: he's completely lost Elsa's trust, and it's going to take an awful awful lot to regain it, if ever.**

 **raven678-The keys (in my mind) were hanging on the wall in the corridor outside the cell. With no guards around and multiple people in the cell, they managed to get ahold of them through the bars. And yes, Elsa was able to fend for herself for awhile even without full access to her magic.:) She knows it wasn't her fault, but she just doesn't understand how anyone could want to do that to her unless she did something wrong.:/ Don't worry, Anna will talk to her lots, and while Elsa might be scared going back there at first, she'll be fine. One thing that will help is simply knowing she can defend herself again (hence her private promise to herself that she was never going to let her magic get depleted so badly again last chapter). (And no, I've never been through anything like that-I wrote it as a reminder that it's NOT the victim's fault, AT ALL, and because plotwise, Elsa needed something to prod her into confronting Grand Pabbie about what he did.) Yes, the townspeople really do care about Elsa, and I thought it was good for Elsa to know that.:)**

 **DodgersGirl-Thank you!:) I'm glad you liked the mirror, and as you know already, I did PM.^_^ :)**

 **On to the story! [Sorry for the crazy long length of this chapter by the way. The end was where I wanted this chapter to end, and I cut out some scenes I felt were unnecessary to tell the story, but it's still really long.:P]**

Anna slipped down to the armory and then the dungeon the second Uncle Thomas had taken Elsa over to Rapunzel's guest room, knowing Elsa would be safe with him and her cousin. Besides, she'd told her uncle in no uncertain terms, do _not_ leave Elsa alone. Now she was standing in front of the cell that held those criminals, and the two guards there were trying to convince her to just go back upstairs. "I want to talk to 'em," Anna said firmly.

"You needn't concern yourself with such riffraff, Princess Anna," one said. (Anna remembered this guard's name was Erik.)

"If my sister didn't expressly order that I can't, then you have to let me," Anna replied, trying to look taller and older than she really was.

Erik and the other guard exchanged looks. The princess was right, but neither of them wanted to let her anywhere near the same men that had tried to assault Queen Elsa. Then Erik noticed something else: Anna's eyes were bright with tears, but she just looked angry. And there was a suspicious lump in her skirt, like she had something hidden in her pocket. "Princess Anna, you're carrying firearms," Erik said quietly. "I don't think you merely want to talk to the prisoners."

Anna didn't deny it. "And? They tried to…to-to do awful, awful things to my big sister!" she blurted, all semblance of mature, calm, grown-up Anna gone.

"And I know your sister won't want you or anyone else…executing them, at least not without a fair trial," Erik replied, wording himself carefully. Quite honestly, he would shoot those men himself in a second if ordered to do so, but he wouldn't do it without Elsa's permission to do so. _Except she's not going to order that. I know she won't._

"Elsa isn't going to sentence them to death," Anna muttered, knowing she was right. "She won't sentence stupid Hans to death after all the rotten things he's done, not even for hurting _me_. There's no way she'll do it 'just' because they hurt her."

"Pardon me for speaking out of turn, but Her Majesty should maybe rethink her position on capital punishment," the other guard jumped in. He guided Anna down the corridor and spoke in a whisper so that the criminals could not hear him. "I respect Queen Elsa and shall be honored to serve under her rule as long as I live, but she's let a weak spot show to all criminals out there with that merciful heart of hers. They have no fear of death because they know she won't execute them, no matter what…and then, on top of that, she spoils her prisoners and I know she isn't trying to. The dungeon is not supposed to be comfortable, and these lowlifes are getting actual meals and whatnot. Such a waste of money, and if anyone realizes that prisoners are getting good, if simple, food and a roof over their heads, well…the dungeon will look mighty comfortable to poor or homeless folk." The guard paused before adding hesitantly, "There is no way she'll listen to me or any of her other guards, but she might listen to you, Princess Anna."

Anna sighed and shook her head. "If I go upstairs and tell Elsa any of that, she's just going to give me some spiel that they're human too and that they have rights too."

Erik walked over to join them, keeping one eye on the cell he and the other guard were supposed to be guarding. "Princess Anna, I heard the last bit of what you just said, and I've got to say, I saw the situation yesterday. A group of men trying to assault a helpless young woman is completely unforgivable. They forfeited any 'human rights' they had. Especially when said young woman is our queen. Automatic death penalty in my mind."

"My sister is not helpless!"

Erik just looked the princess right in the face and shook his head. "When she's so exhausted from trying to protect all of our brains from some weird magic thing that she can barely move, and has a busted leg, she's helpless. She's lucky someone got to her in time. I am not trying to criticize her; anyone would be helpless if they were in her place right then in that condition, trained soldiers included. My point is simply that people willing to assault someone that can't fight back-at least not very well-has no automatic rights whatsoever. They are sick cowards. I heard the rubbish they were saying-they had full intentions of hurting her, _badly_ , and then killing her. There are witnesses. You and your sister don't have to prove a thing."

"Not that Queen Elsa would have to prove anything anyway, as she possesses absolute power, but there is no question whatsoever."

For once Anna was quiet. She honestly agreed with the guards, but she was a hundred percent sure that Elsa would not. Elsa was probably more angry with Grand Pabbie than the captured terrorists that had wanted to hurt and kill her, simply because the old troll had directly put everyone else in danger, not 'just' her. "Erik, I know Elsa knows you, at least sort of. Could you, I don't know, come with me to talk to her about this? Oh, and Elsa isn't going to come check on the prisoners, I know she won't. So make sure they don't get so much food. Like maybe just bread and water or something. I don't care what you do to them otherwise. And I still want to talk to 'em before I go back upstairs."

* * *

When Anna came back upstairs a few minutes later, she found Elsa sitting at her desk working. True to his word, Uncle Thomas hadn't left her alone; he was sitting in the comfy chair in the corner reading. "Uncle Thomas, why'd you let Elsa start work again so soon? She oughta be resting! I know Rapunzel healed her, but she couldn't have fixed Elsa's leg, and-"

Thomas gave the worried princess a reassuring smile. "She's just doing some paperwork and replying to letters, Anna. That isn't going to hurt her leg further. Elsa is the queen; she has her normal everyday responsibilities to take care of. And, Elsa, you promised you would retire early tonight, didn't you?"

"Begrudgingly," came Elsa's slightly grumpy reply. "And I promised I would go to bed, not that I would go to sleep." _I'll just work in bed if I need to._ While she didn't mind her uncle staying in the room while she was working, she did mind the reason he was there…because nobody trusted her to take care of herself properly. Uncle Thomas had made her mother leave the room when Idun had started being overly fussy, though. Elsa had finally just given her mother a hug and said she needed quiet. "Anna! You made me blot my letter!" she scolded when Anna bumped her arm. "And what's so funny?"

"That letter! I would love to be taller than you. Maybe people would think I was older and more mature," Anna said, grinning. "Ooh, and I just thought of something that'd make me taller…I'll be right back."

Elsa opened her mouth to reply, but Anna had already run out. "Uncle Thomas, what do you think she's doing now? I suppose at least Anna isn't fussing because I'm not sleeping or something anymore," she quipped, shaking her head.

"From what I know of Anna, I would guess she's coming back with stilts or different shoes," Thomas told her.

Sure enough, a few minutes later Anna teetered in, her blue-green eyes twinkling with mischief. "Oh, looky, Elsa, I grew," she teased. Anna stuck out one foot, showing Elsa the ridiculously high heeled shoes she'd found in her closet.

Elsa giggled as Anna practically fell onto the bed. "Anna, take off those heels before you fall and break your neck. You can't even walk in them," she said between giggles.

Anna kind of wanted to see how tall she was next to Elsa now, but she didn't want to make Elsa get up since her leg was hurt. She was surprised when Elsa stood up without Anna asking and gestured for her little sister to come. "Elsa, sit down, you don't have to…"

"I know. But I also know you're dying to know how tall you are with those silly shoes," Elsa told her. She laughed as she dropped a pile of snow on Anna for patting her on the head like a little kid. "That's what you get for that, _little_ sister dear," she teased. Elsa frowned when she noticed Anna's knuckles were bruised and bleeding a bit. "Anna, your hand looks like you've been punching something too much. What were you doing?"

Anna did not look sorry as she scrambled to her feet, kicking the silly shoes aside. "Just…taking care of something," she said vaguely, waving off Elsa's concern. She helped Elsa sit back down and get settled again with her injured leg propped up, hoping Elsa wouldn't ask any more about it, although Anna was very sure Elsa was not going to drop it.

Elsa's gaze was sharp. "You know what I think? I think that you went down to the dungeon while Rapunzel healed me because you knew I wouldn't let you. And I think you gifted those…those men your famous punch you gave Hans last summer," she said quietly. "Or worse."

"They were going to do a lot worse to you than a few punches! I wish you'd have them executed!" Anna blurted.

"Anna, you can't just go beat up people because you're angry!" Elsa protested. "I'm fine. The danger is over. And…and it was just me. It's not like they were after you or Rapunzel or something. I will not have people killed on my account."

Anna narrowed her eyes, suddenly realizing something else about Elsa right then. "You put on daytime clothes, prob'ly after Rapunzel healed you, I guess. And you aren't wearing your ice-dress. Or any ice-dress, for that matter. Why?" Honestly Anna thought Elsa looked fine in her outfit, but those were _not_ Elsa's usual clothes. In fact Anna was fairly sure it was something she'd seen Elsa wearing before the Great Thaw…just the older girl wasn't wearing the jacket that went with it, or gloves.

Elsa seemed to be suddenly _very_ focused on the paperwork on her desk. "My ice-dress is, um…too fancy." _Seriously, Elsa? That's the best you could come up with? Anna isn't going to believe that._

"You said you hated a lot of those other clothes, Elsa, because you didn't feel like you in them. If you just want some casual clothes, you can borrow one of my summer dresses if you want. Or get you a blue one or something. I've never, ever heard boo out of you that your ice-dress was 'too fancy'," Anna pointed out. "That's the dumbest excuse ever." She bit her lip a second later; Elsa looked like she might cry. "I didn't say YOU were dumb. Just that excuse," she added, hugging the older girl tightly.

"Elsa, if this has to do with what I think it does, you're wrong," Thomas said after a moment. "Your ice-dress, scandalous or not, doesn't have anything to do with what that scum wanted to do to you." He stood up and gave his niece's shoulder a reassuring squeeze before heading for the door. "I think you need some one-on-one girl talk with your sister right now, so I'm leaving. I'll be in the library if anyone wants me."

* * *

Anna grew concerned when Elsa remained quiet and said nothing. She didn't seem frightened, and she didn't feel cold, but Anna knew she was unhappy. Elsa just stayed stock still, her chin resting on Anna's shoulder, not returning Anna's hug but not pulling away, either. "Elsa, do you really think those creeps' actions are your fault?" Anna asked finally, pulling away so she could look Elsa in the face.

Elsa hesitated and just clasped her hands together uncertainly. "I…I don't know. Mama and Papa think my ice-dress is scandalous. Did I ask for it somehow? I…I mean…I don't…I didn't…I just…I guess I just mean that if I can do something to prevent…that…I want to do it. Even if that means I shouldn't wear my favorite dress. I think?" _That doesn't even make any sense, Elsa. Get yourself together._

"Those stupid creeps did not go after you because of your dress, Elsa," Anna said firmly. "Like Gerda told you-you could've been wearing an ugly sack and they'd still act like that. I don't care what outfit you wear, sis, that's your business. But I'll not have you thinking you can't wear what you want because it's somehow your fault stupid creeps want to hurt you like that. They're sickos, Elsa." All the more Anna wished Erik had let her shoot those horrid people. _Doing that won't fix Elsa's thoughts, though. I can't undo what almost happened._

"Anna, I'm not pretty. So it must have been the dress," Elsa insisted, much to Anna's frustration.

Anna huffed and gently scooped Elsa up and carried her over to the full-length mirror. "What's that I see in the mirror, then?"

All Elsa saw was the same girl in the mirror she always had, the one that needed her little sister to lean on…quite literally at the moment, too, Elsa thought, since she couldn't put any weight on her injured leg yet. "I just see the same old me, same as always," she muttered, shuddering. The last time she'd looked directly into a mirror had been that horrible mirror test thing.

"Elsa, I know you don't understand it, but you are pretty. You look dramatic and exotic. Forgetting that, though, those men went after you because they're cruel and they wanted to hurt you because you kept them from hurting me. And they just wanted to use you. That's all there is to it. Do you understand that? And," Anna added as an afterthought with a scowl, "they didn't want to make a baby, either."

Elsa gave Anna a lopsided smile at that. "I know that, Anna," she said softly. "I'm sorry. I think maybe I know there isn't really anything I could have done to prevent that, but I'm hoping there is because it really, really scared me and I'm terrified it could happen again and next time nobody would get there in time. Does…does that make sense?" She hesitated before continuing, "And what if they assaulted some other girl in the future once they're free? I don't want someone else to feel like that. It was _horrible_."

Anna thought for a minute before replying. _Well, at least Elsa actually acknowledges that it's not her fault. That's good._ "First, that actually does make sense, and second…maybe they shouldn't get to go free, ever, Elsa? Did you think of that? You're well within your rights to have them executed, y'know," she said carefully.

"Anna, I'm 'within my rights' to grab a random thug out of an alley and have him or her executed, too. It doesn't make it right," Elsa said firmly. "I will not be a tyrant. I'm not a…a monster!"

"They're guilty of attempted murder and regicide, Elsa, not to mention the…other…thing they wanted to do to you. They're hardly just random thieves or something."

"I'm not worth multiple lives, Anna!"

Anna gripped her sister's shoulders so tightly Elsa winced. "Don't you dare say that you aren't worth it. Just _don't_. What about the specific one that physically went after you? How about executing just him, as an example to the others?" she suggested, somehow knowing Elsa's reaction before she said a word.

"He still didn't actually do it. I'm here, I'm fine, I'm not dead. I don't think it's right," Elsa insisted. "He scared me, but he didn't get to actually…do anything."

"Elsa, it hurt you to talk, you had bruises and scratches on your neck, you had both hands injured and wrapped up-I assume something was probably broken-and bruises all over your face. He may not have done you-know-what, but he still hurt you. Bad. And I know you think I didn't notice, but I know your leg must have been reinjured, because the splints and bandages aren't the same as before. Which also means you probably had to have it reset. Which hurts like crazy." Anna paused before finishing, "All of which is just to say if you don't do something about those creeps, _I_ will, and I don't care what you say!"

"Anna, please, I'm not w-"

"Stop it! Elsa, stop it! Now! Stop saying you aren't worth stuff!" Anna wailed, clutching Elsa's hands tightly. Tears were running down the younger girl's cheeks, and the whole thing made her want to scream.

"It isn't 'stuff'. I am not worth someone else's life, Anna, and you are not going to change my mind on that. Who am I to decide the value of a person's life? It isn't my decision," Elsa replied, struggling to remain calm. _Anna, please understand. Please._

 _You are too worth someone else's life, Elsa. Especially when the 'other life' in question is just a horrid creep._ "So you think it's wrong to kill people in self-defense?" Anna demanded.

"No, I don't think so, but this isn't self-defense and you know it. They are locked up in the dungeon. So now killing them would be revenge."

"Elsa, you are technically spending Arendelle's tax money to feed them, which is a waste. How do you think your public would react if they knew you were doing that? And," Anna added, thinking of another reason her sister might be more likely to listen to, "you could be spending that money on something else. Like helping all the children like you said you wanted to awhile back."

Elsa hesitated. Anna did have a point; it _was_ a waste to do that, but… "I…I actually agree that it's a waste, but I…I just can't, Anna. What if they could change in the future? What if they regret what they did? Shouldn't they get a second chance, like you gave me?" she whispered.

Anna was so frustrated right then she wanted to scream and smack that train of thought right out of Elsa's head. "You've never, ever done-or attempted-anything nearly as rotten as what those men tried to do to you. Not even your dark self. How dare you compare yourself to people like that?! Elsa, I talked to them-and yes, I punched 'em, too. They don't remember your magic, true, but they certainly remember trying to hurt you. They laughed. They thought it was _funny_. I asked if they were sorry for what they did, and one said, 'Sure, I'm sorry we didn't finish'. And…and they called you a really mean name! So yes! Yes I punched them and I don't care!" She picked Elsa up and plopped down in the comfy chair in the corner of Elsa's room, clutching her big sister close. _Elsa's okay. She might be being all stupid about wanting to 'give them a chance', but she's okay,_ Anna reminded herself. _And she might be a bit scared still, but at least she isn't freaking out and having a panic attack or something._

"Well…at least they only hurt me. That ol' Grand Pabbie nearly hurt everyone! Quite honestly, I'm far more angry with him than those men in the dungeon," Elsa replied. _And I'm safe. Anna is holding me and she won't let anyone hurt me again. And I can use my magic now, so I can defend myself, too._ She hesitated before continuing carefully. "I…need some answers from him as to why he did that, Anna. I don't understand why Grand Pabbie lied to me. I don't understand why he felt he had to set off that explosive in the first place. I need to know. If you'd be willing, I'd like you to come with me, but not actually come into the valley. I…I don't want to go by myself, but I don't trust those trolls at all, all the more so after what happened."

Anna gave Elsa a comforting squeeze. "I don't want you anywhere near the trolls, Elsa, not after what Grand Pabbie made you do with the weird mirror thing," she said firmly. "Hey, wait a minute. You couldn't defend yourself when those horrid creeps went after you because of Grand Pabbie! Because he made you fight the mirror! All of it…ALL OF IT, was his fault!"

Elsa didn't say anything about the last bit of what Anna had said, since she couldn't help agreeing. "Anna, I need some answers. I have to go talk to him," she said quietly. "I'll be fine."

* * *

"I don't know how I can thank and repay you for helping us," Elsa told Emily shortly before dinnertime. "Thank you so much for being willing to come."

Emily's dark brown eyes gleamed as she sat up and just crossed her arms. "Firstly, your guest rooms in this castle are ten times more comfortable than my brother's and my apartment in the States. Secondly, I still consider myself a citizen of Arendelle, even if I haven't lived here since I was seven. Thirdly, I know just how you can thank and repay me," she said, smiling even as she dropped her head politely at the queen.

Elsa was puzzled by Emily's countenance. The fire mage acted like she was about to demand something silly or ridiculous, and yet she was clearly trying to be polite, too. She just stayed quiet, waiting for Emily to explain since she didn't know what to say. When Emily said nothing, Elsa finally just asked, "What might that be? Also, you can just call me Elsa." It didn't feel right to her to let Emily call her by her title, even though she didn't know Emily very well. Not when Emily was the first and only person she had met with elemental magic like hers.

"Well, there are five things. One, I want to experiment with my magic and yours. A friendly fight, maybe, once we practice." Emily quickly backtracked when Elsa began shaking her head, her blue eyes scrunched shut. "Not like that weird mirror thing I heard about. We can just stop if either of us are tired in any way."

"O…okay," Elsa forced herself to say.

"And two…" Emily pushed her hair to the side and showed Elsa her flame 'birthmark' on her neck. "Do you have something like that, too?" Emily asked hopefully. "I've known it was from my magic since I first knew it was there when I was a kid. I thought you might, too."

Elsa bit her lip. I have no idea. "I don't know," she admitted after a moment. "I didn't know natural mages had identifying birthmarks like that." _And I'm so pale you probably can't see it if I do have one._ Elsa let Emily look, and was inexplicably disappointed when the other girl shook her head.

"You don't. At least not in the same place," Emily said, disappointed. "Maybe you have one somewhere else? Wait a second…" she grinned and nodded, "you _do_ have one! It's a tiny snowflake. Not quite in the same spot-yours is a bit off to one side. You just can barely see it because your skin is so…"

"You can say it. Pale," Elsa said, giggling. Somehow the idea that she had something else that was the same as someone else that had to do with her magic just made her so happy. Emily was an elemental mage, just like her. "What…what are the other three things?"

Emily's grin morphed into a scowl, but Elsa knew the other girl wasn't angry with her, so this did not bother her. "You already know I can't walk, Q-Elsa. I don't want to rely on my air currents all the time to get around while I'm here. It's so awkward and tiring. So-"

"Emily, I'll bet you can make a wheelchair," Elsa said, instantly knowing what Emily needed. "Does your magic feel…tired still?"

"Yes, some, but since your water gave all those citizens water powers, you saved your cousin and me from being stuck in bed with no magic access for who knows how long." Emily summoned a small flame in her hand and frowned. "How can fire make something solid that won't burn someone else when they touch it?"

Elsa created a small piece of ice that was merely cool to the touch and handed it to Emily. "The fire equivalent of this," she said simply.

"It barely feels like ice! Could be glass, almost," Emily said incredulously. "But that still doesn't explain how fire can make something solid. By definition, fire isn't solid…"

"Obsidian," Elsa replied, her blue eyes twinkling excitedly.

"What?! I'm not an earth or rock mage, or whatever would control that!" Emily protested. "Obsidian is solidified lava!"

Elsa nodded. "Yes, but as my little sister has told me many times, this is magic we're talking about. Ice can't make fabric, but I can make ice-dresses. Ice isn't impenetrable, but mine can be. We can both alter the temperature. That is not directly ice or fire. You probably can't produce natural obsidian, but I'll bet you can make fire and force it to a solidified form." She hesitated before adding, "Please don't think I'm a magic expert, because I am the farthest thing from it."

 _Elsa makes water, but she's not a hydrokinetic. So she can only make less of it. Maybe pyrokinetics like me can make lava to the same extent?_ Like Elsa had done the first time she had created water, Emily struggled to produce even a little bit of lava. Elsa immediately cooled it before it could ruin the floor or the furniture, leaving a small piece of shiny black rock behind…that looked exactly like the obsidian Emily had seen in books.

The girls grinned at each other.

"Try solid fire," Elsa urged excitedly. She was nearly clapping her hands in excitement. As it was, she dropped her crutches and plopped down in a haphazard large pile of snow. This was awesome to her. She couldn't wait to experiment more with their magic. Who knew what they could do with ice magic and fire magic put together?!

"Fire isn't solid," Emily insisted.

"You have to will it to be that way," Elsa said, completely sure that she was right. "Like, just think that you want it solid in a particular shape. And…and don't burn the floor. Gerda will have a fit."

Emily laughed. "My fire won't burn anything unless I want it to. It'll be warm where it's been, but don't worry about that. I just couldn't control that lava bit because it's not my…normal production." Using Elsa's advice, making solid fire was easy, much to her surprise. In seconds she was sitting in the wheelchair she'd just made. "It feels like a fiery throne or something," she commented, laughing.

"It looks like one, too," Elsa replied, smiling. "May I…may I touch it?" she asked hesitantly.

"I did drop its surface temperature as much as I could, but I think it's still going to be too hot for you," Emily warned. "You're naturally cooler than ordinary people, and I'll bet you're sensitive to heat, just like I'm sensitive to cold."

Sure enough, Elsa yelped and jerked her hand away, even though it hadn't really been hot enough to actually burn her. "It's not burning hot, but it's too hot for me to touch. And probably uncomfortably so for normal people," she said, making an ice cube in her hand to get rid of the nasty hot feeling.

"Why do you think that we're not normal?" Emily asked suddenly, looking Elsa right in the eyes. "Why does 'ordinary' have to be the only 'normal'?"

"Emily, look at what we're doing. Bending rules of physics and creating magical fire and ice out of nothing!" Elsa exclaimed. While she didn't feel nearly as 'bad' or 'defective' as she had for much of her life, somehow Elsa still couldn't quite get rid of that mindset completely. She knew it was okay to be different, but a bit of her still wanted to throw those cruel descriptions in her face again. Those words just couldn't hurt her anywhere near as much anymore.

"Maybe natural mages are normal and everybody else is weird and abnormal," Emily suggested, shrugging. "Maybe people are just scared of what they don't understand, because they don't take the time to understand, and there are stupid creatures like the rock trolls trying to take people's memories. Elsa," she paused, unsure what to make of her new friend's countenance, "what happened to you that took the _real_ magic away?" Emily's voice was suddenly quiet. "I mean the magic that kind of just comes with the knowledge of knowing that you have amazing abilities seemingly nobody else does."

Elsa didn't reply immediately; she made her way over to the window and just stared outside. _How am I supposed to respond to that? I'm not explaining myself to a girl I barely know, even if she is like me._ "Did you see the moving picture with Anna and me in it?" she asked finally.

"Well sure, but that's just a movie. Obviously it's not all true. Your mom is here, and I heard her talking about your dad being in Weselton."

"The rest of it is true," Elsa answered, hoping with all her heart that Emily wouldn't laugh at her or something. She pasted that neutral expression on her face before turning around, refusing to let Emily see her cry…or look like she might.

"You're making your animated self's conceal-don't-feel face," Emily said quietly. She paused again, suddenly realizing exactly what the problem was, something that was completely glossed over in the movie. "Elsa, your parents abused you, didn't they." It wasn't a question.

Elsa stiffened all over. Could everyone just automatically see that there was something bad enough wrong with her that they would jump to that conclusion? "My parents did the best they could," she said firmly.

"That doesn't mean they didn't abuse you, all the same. My brother loves me, I know he does, but when he gets drunk, he sometimes hits me. Do you think that counts as abuse?" Emily asked, crossing her arms. "People can abuse you even if they care about you. Also making a little girl wear gloves to hide part of who she is, is just cruel." _No wonder Elsa doesn't have 'the real magic' anymore._ "You've probably got social anxiety from being isolated from people for who knows how long, too. Which does not mean there's something wrong with you, it just is."

"I can talk to people just fine!" _No, you can't, Elsa. You're fine with a few people, but you hate social situations and they always make you nervous. You still want to get out of attending your own birthday party._

Emily shook her head and tried to give Elsa a reassuring smile. "I believe you. You can have social anxiety and appear perfectly fine in public. That just means you've learned how to deal with it. How do you feel about this big birthday bash I've been hearing about?"

Elsa sighed and decided to just tell the truth. "I hate it. I was thinking about trying to use my leg to get out of attending. It's not like anyone would miss talking to me. At my coronation ball last year, I could barely keep up with a conversation-I kept waiting too long trying to figure out what to say. Most people seemed nice and understanding about it, but one lady was angry. She told me she'd had better conversations with her pet dog. I was mortified." Thinking about the incident now made Elsa cringe in embarrassment.

"Oh, good grief, that's terrible!" Emily felt horrible for laughing, but she couldn't help it. Luckily Elsa wasn't perturbed at all; her pale cheeks were a bit pink, but she was smiling. "I'm so sorry for laughing, I just…seriously, I'm sorry. I hope you punished her somehow for saying something that mean! By the way, speaking of that…I never told you the other two things I wanted."

Elsa just looked at her expectantly.

"I want permission to _visit_ those criminals that went after you like that," Emily said pointedly. She tossed a fireball from hand to hand, clearly angry. The fireball grew bigger, and Elsa's eyes went wide. "Yes, anger and hate affect my ability to control my magic. And?" Emily asked. She dissolved the fireball and leaned back in her chair, crossing her arms again.

"What do you want to do to them?" Elsa asked hesitantly, not entirely sure she wanted to know.

"Elsa, what do you care? They wanted to do something that, in my opinion, is one of the absolute worst things one person can do to another. I'd have them executed if I were you," Emily spat, hot orange sparks flashing from her fists.

Elsa flinched back. "I don't want to kill them, and I'll not have you or anyone else go down there to beat them up, either," she said firmly. "My little sister already tried to convince me to have them…executed…"

"Your guards probably already have beaten them up. And I agree with your sister. They should be executed. Waste of money and unsafe for everyone if they're ever released. The other thing I wanted was to help find these three little boys' older sister. My brother found them abandoned in an alley back in the United States. We don't have room for them in our apartment," Emily explained.

 _Could it be?! Meri said she had three little brothers…_ "What is the older sister's name?" Elsa asked, not quite daring to hope that it would be this easy to find Meri's younger siblings.

"I think…Mel? Meri? Something like that."

Elsa smiled. "I think I've already found her."

* * *

After reading Ingrid's ice pane diary late into the night (in bed, since she had promised to 'retire early'), Elsa had decided privately that she would go talk to Grand Pabbie alone, even though the idea of going back to the Valley of the Living Rock alone frightened her. It was clear to Elsa that while Ingrid had made a mess of things herself, the trolls were not innocent, either…except she wasn't sure if the trolls had helped or harmed things. In any event Arendelle's history would have been much different if Ingrid and Grand Pabbie had not done the things they had. _I'll just take Linnae with me_ , Elsa decided.

So, early the next morning, Elsa slipped out of the castle unnoticed. "Linnae, I need your help getting to the troll valley," she told her dragon, who was rather acting like a guard dog out in the courtyard.

Linnae just stared at her quizzically and blinked her icy eyes lazily. _That is a very bad idea, Elsa. You have a broken leg. Go back to bed._

"No," Elsa said firmly. "I need to talk to Grand Pabbie. My magic feels much better now, and I'll have you with me. We'll be fine. Please, Linnae. I don't want to put any non-mages in danger by bringing Anna or something. I can go by myself with my air currents, but I'd really rather not do that…"

Linnae huffed in disapproval, but she carefully picked Elsa up in her mouth and took off toward the troll valley, knowing Elsa wouldn't be able to ride on her back, at least not without making her leg hurt more than it probably already did. _I will freeze those stupid troll creatures if they hurt you, Elsa_ , the dragon informed her.

* * *

VALLEY OF THE LIVING ROCK

"You surprise me," were Pabbie's first words when Elsa and Linnae landed. "I did not think you would dare come here again."

"The Valley of the Living Rock lies well within Arendelle's borders," Elsa responded. " _My_ country. Not yours. Grand Pabbie, you had no right to set off that explosive whatsoever." Elsa's voice was quiet and unthreatening, but she stood as tall as she could with Linnae at her side. Thinking of what Anna had told her the day before, she'd pulled out her green flowered ice-dress she had made around Anna's birthday six months before; but she had carefully braided and pinned up her hair and made an icy crown that matched the one she had tossed away when she'd run off to the North Mountain the summer before. She wanted to feel-and look-like both the Snow Queen and Arendelle's ruler. "I want to know why you acted as you did."

"You were not supposed to be able to stop us, Queen Elsa," Pabbie said slowly.

"I had help, thank goodness. Pabbie, did you coerce me into fighting that mirror thing so I wouldn't be strong enough to fight back when you set off that explosive?" Elsa asked, carefully keeping her voice neutral. "Please tell me the truth. I know about what happened with Ingrid. Were you afraid I might act as she did?"

The old troll slowly shook his head. "You have something your ancestor did not, something more powerful than you know. Queen Elsa, there have been many natural mages, but very few can make life constructs. Even fewer are pure of heart like you. Never lose that, my child."

 _Elsa is not your child_. Linnae wrapped one wing around Elsa as if protecting her.

Elsa ignored all this and just waited expectantly for Grand Pabbie to continue.

"I have told you this before-you are the most powerful mage I have ever seen. You have far more potential than you give yourself credit for. You do not practice mastering your magic. I felt you needed a push. I knew you would not do your best fighting the mirror, let alone do so voluntarily, unless you had something to fight for," Grand Pabbie said truthfully. "That something was the people's memories."

"Grand Pabbie, you know I am not an ice master. It's physically impossible for me to beat that test or whatever it is right now," Elsa pointed out. _I still don't understand. Why does he care so much whether I become an ice master or not? And that still doesn't explain why he went ahead and set off the explosive when he didn't have to._

"Yet you tried anyway. You didn't just give up immediately, even though you thought it was an impossible battle."

Elsa's gaze was sharp, and she could feel frustrated ice tingling in her fingertips, but she didn't lose control. "Pabbie, you had to have known I would react that way. I ended up insanely exhausted with a broken leg, and I couldn't defend myself when people...attacked me. All for no reason, just because you decided it's your business what I do with my powers." She hesitated before adding, "And none of this explains why, after all that, you still chose to set off that explosive when you didn't have to." Elsa frowned at the honest expression of confusion on Pabbie's face.

"There is always exhaustion and potential injuries with a magic test. No big deal. I should, however, have instructed Kristoff to make sure you were not left alone until you could easily access your abilities again. For that I am sorry."

"I was left alone because Anna and I were trying to figure out a plan to stop _your_ explosive! Anna would never, ever have left me by myself otherwise!" Elsa understood that for whatever reason, the trolls found it acceptable to get hurt doing magic tests. Fine. But that didn't excuse the lying. "And Grand Pabbie, you lied to me. You're right, I wouldn't have voluntarily chosen to fight that mirror. But that is my decision." Elsa hesitated again before continuing quietly, "You may be centuries-maybe even more-older than I am, but this" she held out her snowflake, "this is _mine_. I'm not perfect-nowhere near it. But let me make my own mistakes, please. If that means I don't become an ice master, so be it. All I want is to keep my country safe. It's my _job_." _And…and it's terrifying to me that everyone…everyone, including Anna, could have potentially lost their memories of what makes me…me. Even though I know that's selfish._

"You just turned twenty-two. You are not old enough to understand, Queen Elsa." Pabbie's voice was quiet; he could tell Elsa was actually angry, and scared, too. "Also, your job is not the only thing that worries you."

Elsa bit her lip hard. She suddenly wished she had Anna there with her. Anna would hold her hand and make her feel better, too. _Stop it, Elsa. You came alone on purpose, because you didn't want to risk Anna's safety. Get it together._ "I'm sorry it scares me that everyone, including Anna, could have lost their memories of what makes me, well…me," she deadpanned, her eyes sharp. "And, Grand Pabbie, I do not think you completely understand humans in general, no matter how old you are. Maybe trying to hide magic from humans is why some normal people are scared of it…maybe why some mages are scared of what they can do, why they can't control it properly. Ingrid nearly ruined Arendelle because of her magic-and because of just plain bad decisions. I think you and her may have done the best thing you could at the time, by erasing everyone's memories and cloaking Arendelle to prevent war and Arendelle being absorbed, but I am _not_ her. And the world is different now. All except for our little corner of the Earth."

The old troll shook his head. "Arendelle and its neighbors are not the only…different corners of Earth, Queen Elsa. There are others. More natural mages like you and Emily. Other countries like yours."

"You mean more…cloaked ones hidden by magic? If they're hidden by magic, how do you know they exist? And what are they?" Elsa didn't understand, and it was unnerving to her that she didn't understand.

"Yes and no. For one, have you heard of Atlantis?"

"Of course. A legendary island that sunk into the sea."

"Atlantis is not lengendary, and it did not sink into the sea. Merpeople live there. Do you know what most ordinary humans would do if they ever found a mermaid or merman?" Pabbie looked Elsa right in the eyes.

Elsa looked down at the ground and just nodded slowly. _Worse than whatever they might have wanted to do with me in that laboratory place._ "Probably experiment on them," she whispered. Her blue eyes were bright with tears as she asked hopefully, "Do any mermaids live in the fjord?"

"No, my child, I am sorry," Pabbie told her gently. "But I see you do understand. The other thing is complicated. Queen Elsa, there are…other trolls, outside your lands, who are not good. Once upon a time, eons ago, there was a worldwide flood. All but two of my kind and two of the white trolls died."

Elsa was skeptical of this. "You are literally rocks. How does a flood kill rocks? And what are 'white trolls'? And I find it hard to believe that this is the flood mentioned in Genesis, but I can't imagine what else you could be referring to."

"You catch on fast. A flood directly cannot kill rocks, of course, but rocks do erode and break. They can shatter." Grand Pabbie's rocky face crinkled into a smile as he added, "The white trolls live in Dover. Now do you understand their name?"

 _Dover? As in the Strait of Dover with the white cliffs?_ Elsa had seen illustrations of that in a book before, but she was still hesitant to believe anything Grand Pabbie told her. "I suppose that means they can hide there because they blend in with the cliffs. What does that have to do with anything, however?"

"They hold a grudge on us for being entrusted with the mirror and the magic book you once borrowed. Right now they cannot find us because of the cloak around Arendelle. Their abilities are different from ours. They steal magic, Queen Elsa, because they are saving it up to wipe out all other magic once and for all, so that they will be the only ones who possess and control it."

Elsa shook her head and balled her hands into fists. "And _you_ wanted to steal everyone's memories!" she nearly shouted. "How do I know all this is even true? And at least stealing magic doesn't change who someone is!"

"Yet you said you were scared of everyone forgetting what made you you. You were right, you know."

"Grand Pabbie, stop with the cryptic statements. I have no idea who or what entrusted you with that awful mirror or the magic book. I have no idea why someone powerful who would lie to a weaker individual to make them do something would be entrusted with those things. I don't understand any of it. But I don't care what feud you have with these other trolls, if they even exist. You are not meddling with me or my family or anyone in this country if I can help it any more." Tears were streaming down Elsa's cheeks, but her voice was strong. "I _am_ 'too young to understand', but I will not let you hurt us again. It's not right to steal innocent people's memories." She abruptly stiffened when something else crossed her mind, and without thinking, she tried to take a step forward, only to crumple to the ground because of her injured leg. "You can see bits of the future and can tell bits of what is going on in the present. You knew how Papa treated me. And…and you didn't do anything." Elsa felt Linnae's wings wrapping around her, pulling her close and hiding her in an icy cocoon, but she didn't try to make the dragon let her go. She just cried. _Anna was too little to do anything, and Gerda didn't have the authority to. But Grand Pabbie could have done something. Told Papa something before we even left the Valley of the Living Rock. Sent him a message. Anything._

"Everything happens for a reason."

Elsa's heart clenched at that comment, but she didn't reply. Curled up and shaking against Linnae's wing, her leg throbbing from trying to put weight on it, she felt like the terrified little eight-year-old from long before, when she'd been here the very first time. She could remember asking about Anna remembering her powers. The hologram vision thing Grand Pabbie had shown her. Hiding her face in her daddy's jacket. Her father's words about closing the gates. Pabbie saying nothing to stop that course of action. The old troll hadn't even said it wasn't a good idea to do that, let alone stopped it. _I don't want 'everything happens for a reason' to be the explanation. It can't be. Why?_

 _Except…even if Pabbie had said something, Papa wouldn't have listened to him. I know he wouldn't. And…and Someone told me I had to come back, because I had a job to do. I didn't hurt anymore there. I'm not going to be all…damaged inside forever. I don't have to talk to or be around Grand Pabbie, but I shouldn't get all distraught over this, either. It's okay. I'm okay._ Without even trying to get up, she 'told' Linnae, _Tell Grand Pabbie we're leaving, and not to expect me to come to him for help again._

* * *

Anna still wasn't even awake when Elsa arrived home, and Elsa just awkwardly climbed onto Anna's bed beside her and just hugged her close. She wouldn't wake her little sister up, but she just didn't want to be alone, either. Anna was there; she was solid, not a dream; and she had always tried to help. _Even when we were little, she tried to help me. Anna would have spoken up. Good grief, she tried to speak up for me even when she didn't know what was wrong with me._

When Anna woke up a little while later, she didn't understand why Elsa was there, but she didn't mind, either. She just gently pushed Elsa's arm aside and sat up; then frowned when she realized Elsa wasn't just asleep, but crying, too. "Elsa, wake up. I don't know what's wrong, but whatever it is is ok. I promise," Anna said quietly. Elsa tried to reach for Anna's hand, and rather than taking it, Anna just tugged her to a sitting position and held her tightly.

Elsa let out a frightened whimper, but she quickly relaxed, remembering where she was. She'd fallen asleep in Anna's room and ended up having a bad dream, and now Anna was holding her. _I didn't lose control, at least not a lot_ , she realized. Elsa could feel that she was probably quite a bit cooler than normal, but it obviously hadn't been enough that Anna needed to put a blanket around her to be able to touch her safely. And there was no ice or snow on the bed or the floor, just frost on her hands and a few snowflakes floating around her. "Thank you, Anna," she whispered.

"You're welcome, but I want to know what happened that made you upset like that," Anna told her. "Hey, wait a minute. You got dressed already. You weren't in here until after going someplace this morning, were you? And I bet I know where, too!" Anna held her closer and scowled. "I told you I didn't want you anywhere near those trolls, Elsa!"

"Don't worry. I am never going there again if I can help it." Elsa quickly told Anna everything Grand Pabbie had said. "And, right before I left with Linnae, he said Emily and I were important. That we had to master our abilities. Anna, I don't understand…I don't understand any of it. I don't even know if Grand Pabbie was telling me the truth and not some tall tale. I'm scared," she admitted shakily. "I…I almost hope he _was_ lying. I always wished either that I were normal or that there were more people like me, but if he was telling the truth, there are evil magical creatures and humans out there somewhere. I don't know how to deal with that…" She paused and took a deep breath to try to calm herself down. "I couldn't even beat that mirror, Anna. What if there is some bad natural mage out there that is a master? Or-"

"Elsa," Anna interrupted, the real truth dawning on her, "what Grand Pabbie did to you-us-was wrong, but I don't think he was telling you a tall tale this morning." She continued slowly, "I don't know for sure, of course, but I think…I think you and Emily might be so-called 'destined' to save magic somehow. It's not an accident that you and her once met as kids and have now run into each other again."

"If that's true, then I don't even have any control over my future!"

Anna hugged the older girl close as a shudder ran through her body. _You're going to be ok, Elsa, I'll make sure of it._ "Yes, you do, sis. I don't believe in fate one bit, so I bet if you and Emily choose not to do whatever it is you're 'supposed' to do, then either something horrible will happen or, most likely, someone else will take your place. You know, kind of like how you're in that magic book, but we found out your name would disappear from it if you sat around and did nothing." Anna gave Elsa's hand a reassuring squeeze as she added, "I imagine Grand Pabbie has tried to get other natural mages to fix whatever is going on with those white trolls for hundreds, maybe even thousands, of years and it's never worked out, and now he's trying again with you and Emily, that's all."

"I don't want to save the world's magic or whatever else. I just want to be a normal girl and spend the rest of my life here in Arendelle with you and the rest of my friends and family," Elsa mumbled, biting her lip again. _Get yourself together, Elsa. Just…stop it. Seriously._

Anna hopped up and grabbed a handkerchief from a drawer and handed it to Elsa. "You're biting your lip so hard it's bleeding," she scolded. "Elsa, should you decide not to become an ice master and just stay here at home taking care of Arendelle, I'll support you. If you want to go and take over the whole continent-as long as you're being nice, of course-I'll support you. I promise I will support you no matter what you do. I know Ingrid didn't have that support, but you do. I love you so much, and you have a country full of citizens that do, too."

"Well, you and everyone else shouldn't," Elsa said softly. "All I do is complicate things. If all those things Grand Pabbie said are true, then that's true all the more. Maybe…maybe you shouldn't have saved me last summer. You should have just…let me d-die. Then maybe Arendelle wouldn't be having so much trouble with different things all the time. You could have been queen and nobody would have bothered Arendelle anymore. The Great Freeze would've just eventually faded into legend, along with the dangerous and terrified Snow Queen, and that would be that."

"I won't apologize for saving your life, Elsa," Anna told her firmly. She tried to look Elsa in the eyes, but the older girl wouldn't meet her gaze, and Elsa seemed to be shaking all over, like she was trying not to cry. Anna scrunched her eyes shut and just hugged Elsa tightly. _If I was in Elsa's place, I suppose I'd think the same thing…all Elsa can see right now is that she grew up hurting for so long and then 'caused' a bunch of crazy things to happen. She doesn't understand because she doesn't see any point to any of it, so she thinks it would have been better for everyone, including herself, if she wasn't here. Wait a minute…_ Anna abruptly pushed Elsa away and took her by the hands. "Elsa, you're not suicidal again…are you?" she asked hesitantly.

Elsa's cheeks turned pink in embarrassment, but she immediately shook her head. "No. Just thinking of a cynical what-if," she answered truthfully. "Besides, even if I did feel like that again, which I don't, I promised you I wouldn't try that again." Elsa followed Anna's gaze to the small scar on her left wrist, and she instinctively jerked that arm away. "Quit staring at it! Please."

"I'm sorry, Elsa, I'm just worried about you," Anna apologized quickly. "I don't know what I would do without you. You might still be hurting and frightened sometimes, but you help _me_. I don't want you to ever, ever think that you shouldn't exist because you 'cause problems'. I don't want you to be hurting any more, inside," she pressed Elsa's hand to her heart, "or out," she nodded at Elsa's broken leg. "You've been through so much, and I'm going to make sure nothing else horrible happens to you. If you do go on some quest to save the world's magic eventually, we're going to make you so strong it won't even be a quest in the first place. And if you just stay home and govern Arendelle like you want? Well, then you'll have me and Gerda and your friends and everyone else right there with you."

Elsa gave Anna a lopsided smile. Suddenly everything that had been scaring her about…well, everything, didn't seem to matter anymore. Ice master or not, she was in full control of her magic now, at least most of the time; and she had her baby sister with her. She thought of what Jade had done to her and Anna those months before, and while the memory still made her shudder, it no longer frightened her. Anna would never, ever purposely hurt her or get rid of her…or even want to get rid of her. So there. She had to admit she was still a bit frightened about those men trying to hurt her, but otherwise she felt fine. And, well…if what Grand Pabbie had said was true, then she wanted all of the rest of the story, and Anna would help her. She reached for Anna and just gave her a grateful hug. "Thank you. For everything." _For fixing me_ , she finished mentally.

 _I'm glad you feel better, Elsa_ , Anna thought, but she just squeezed Elsa back and said nothing.

"Ingrid froze Arendelle just like I did, but she also killed her husband and her best friend. I wish she had had someone like you, Anna, that would have known how to help her," Elsa said after a moment. "And-"

"From what you told me last night, she also wasn't allowed to marry the man she really loved. She had to marry somebody else, and the somebody else liked her friend, not her. They all caused a scandal, Elsa. That's kind of Ingrid's fault, at least indirectly, and it has NOTHING to do with magic she couldn't control. She should have married Stormr if that was who she really loved, not Dominic, even if Dominic was a nice person. And if she really felt like it was her job as queen to marry Dominic, she should've stayed away from Stormr. Her friend Celeritas ended up paying the price for the mess she made with that. None of that has anything to do with magic, or the whole crazy plan she eventually made with the trolls with erasing everyone's memories and stuff." Anna wasn't sure what to tell Elsa, but she was determined not to let her sister think that she was like Ingrid, because in Anna's mind, Elsa wasn't. Ingrid may have honestly been trying to do the right things, but she'd also made a few (costly) selfish decisions along the way, and far too many well-meaning wrong ones.

Elsa nodded and smiled just a bit. "I suppose so."

"Enough about all that history and destiny stuff, then," Anna said, her blue-green eyes sparkling excitedly, "although I suppose what I'm gonna show you is still a bit history-y. I am so excited for your birthday party! Look at this, Elsa!" Anna hopped up and ran over to her closet and shoved several dresses aside before yanking out two garment bags. "I was going to wait 'til the morning of the party to show you, but Gerda told me yesterday that I should show you ahead of time so we could make sure your bunad fit. They're both sooo pretty-yours and mine both. Gerda went and dug around in the attic to see if there might be some design to base them off of, but all she found were some old pencil sketches in a small box. So there were no color hints. I wanted yours to be ice-blue, but Gerda thought we should use purple and green, like our flag."

"And I say she was right," Elsa said firmly, but she looked happy. "Which one's mine?" she asked. This question was instantly answered as Anna pushed one garment bag into her arms and ran off behind a screen with her own.

"You try yours on, Elsa!" Anna called from behind the screen. "I won't come out 'til you say I can, 'kay? Good grief, Elsa, I'm so excited. Can we have a chocolate fountain? And krumkaker? Loads and loads of it? And maybe-oh, never mind, I oughta let you pick what we're eating since it's your birthday, not mine, and…"

Elsa giggled at her little sister's ongoing chatter. While she honestly wasn't looking forward to the party- _at all_ -it was nice to be talking about something normal like a birthday party, and it made her happy to hear Anna's excitement. "Anna, you can pick all of the food for all I care, as long as it's not something nasty you know I hate. Just…please don't get over the top, that's all," she replied. "Okay?" Then she yelped when something-probably Anna-crashed into the entire screen and knocked the whole thing over. "Anna! How did you even do that?! And go away! I'm not dressed yet!"

Anna's instinctive reaction was to fuss about being told 'go away', but Elsa was clutching her ice-dress against her chest and looking genuinely upset, so she just stood the screen back up and went back behind it. "Sorry, I just kind of…fell into it," she apologized from behind the screen again. Anna bounced on her toes as she waited for Elsa.

"I know-it's okay, Anna, really. Just…give me a minute…" Elsa's voice trailed off.

Anna heard rustling and a muffled yelp, and she had to resist going to help. "Are you all right?"

"Yes, I just almost fell 'cause of my leg, that's all. Almost done. You can come out now, though. I have the blouse and skirt on, and I'm lacing up the bodice now…okay, I'm done." Elsa was smiling now, even at the 'other' Elsa in Anna's mirror. _I actually look…nice, for once. Maybe a bit too pale because of the dark purple, but okay otherwise._ Elsa's smile grew bigger when Anna appeared in the mirror's reflection beside her. "I think Gerda picked colors perfectly," she said softly. "And, I'm glad they go together but aren't identical, too!"

Anna laughed. With her in green with purple trim, and Elsa in purple with green trim, they matched, in Anna's opinion, and she was delighted that Elsa actually looked happy in something other than her ice-dresses. She grinned when Elsa handed her something. "Gerda said you'd probably do that," Anna said, giggling.

"I thought something might be up when there was no sølje with mine, so I made one." Elsa's smile disappeared as another thought popped into her head. "What about our parents?"

"Oh, don't worry about them, Elsa. They know what they're supposed to wear," Anna said quickly. She reached for Elsa's hand and gave her a reassuring squeeze. _I'm not telling Elsa they may or may not be there, no way am I doing that. She's happy now._

 **A/N: Yeah, not sure what to do with the creeps in the dungeon to be honest. If anyone has a logical solution/argument to kill them off (ie., that will convince Elsa to execute them or get another character to kill them without permission), please tell me. It IS a waste of money/space/etc, and yet I cannot see Elsa willingly ordering capital punishment. So.**

 **As for the trolls, Pabbie's crazy things that Elsa wasn't quite sure were true ARE true.:) Expanded story-verse possibilities, much? ^_^**

 **Emily and Elsa will continue experimenting with their magic, obviously; Elsa (because of Emily) has found Meri's brothers; and some more about Ingrid. I didn't go into too much detail because I want to finish Ingrid's story in 'No Escape' and it would spoil the whole story, but there's the basics of what happened.**

 **I don't know enough about _bunader_ to write a lot of details about Anna's and Elsa's clothes at the very end, so please just look up some real pictures and use your imagination.:) I am not going to risk writing the wrong details and make it all inaccurate, because I hate mistakes like that.:P**

 **Next (maybe last?) chapter coming soon!**


	46. Chapter 46

**A/N: Thanks to everyone who's followed/favorited and/or is reading but not reviewing:)**

 **A special thanks to Olivia O'Neil, Elsa Tomago, FluffyKitten, and raven678 for help with figuring out how to get rid of those criminals. And, Madi from the AG forum, I don't know if you'll see this or not, but thank you for helping with character reactions after the fact!:)**

 **Olivia O'Neil-Thank you for your input!^_^ I used a mixture of your ideas, mine, and others:)**

 **FluffyKitten-Yeah, Elsa especially hates the idea of executing anyone because she's tried so hard NOT to hurt anyone for so long. Lol, yes, Anna was teasing Elsa a little.;) Elsa doesn't really consider herself short or anything, but she doesn't want Anna taller than she is, haha. But she's still up for Anna's teasing since Anna wasn't being mean to her.:) You have a point-Elsa's statement that she will not go to Pabbie for help might not have been the best thing to say aloud.:P It won't come into play in this story, but it might in the future...*dundundun***

 **GeekGirl2-Elsa won't purposely hurt the trolls, but she may not be so eager to help them again if it risks her own safety, which she usually wouldn't put before saving others. And she will probably never trust him again, not that she did completely in the first place.:P**

 **Elsa Tomago-Thank you for the idea about the nightmare-that does indeed happen. And actually, your other ideas too, for that matter:)**

 **IndyGirl89-Anna is helpful for Elsa because she listens and tries to help, too. And, of course, Elsa actually trusts her, unlike a lot of other people.:P**

 **raven678-You're right, Elsa does know it wasn't her fault; she's just shaken up.:/ There will be more Emily next chapter! I mean, there's a tiny bit of her in this one, but not much.:P Elsa was just upset Emily immediately jumped to that conclusion, not so much that she knew, if that makes sense. Elsa will still have the concert, but it won't be officially in this story because I'm ending it at her birthday party, and that's in just a couple days. She's doing the concert AFTER her leg heals:P And yes, about 12-year-old Elsa's story. Exactly. Elsa knows that now, and that's made her upset.:/**

 **On to the story!**

"Miss Elsa, you really should consider what we are to do with those men in the dungeon," Kai said that evening. "I know you are merely trying to be fair and just, but you have a tendency to be far too lenient with your sentencing. Also, that disgraced prince has a letter for you. I said I would give it to you, but I told him he was not welcome within the castle walls, too."

Elsa scowled as she closed her book and opened the letter. "I told him I was not interested," she muttered. She had been quite content sitting on a sofa in the library, happily reading a book. Kiara and Rapunzel were playing with Anikka and Eliot on the floor; and Anna and Kristoff were playing a game of team chess against Emily and Meri. Elsa was happy to read by herself, since she still felt included with the two chess teams asking her for pointers now and then. That arrangement was perfect to her. "Oh, good grief," Elsa said to herself once she'd speed-read part of the letter.

Anna hopped up and giggled as she read over Elsa's shoulder. "I don't know whether to laugh or be disturbed at this," she announced. "Gimme it, Elsa. Can I read the whole thing?"

"I don't care, to be honest. Is he trying to be funny, or trying to be dramatic and failing? 'Turquoise orbs'?! That sounds like an ornament for a Christmas tree! And I don't like being called cute, either." Elsa shook her head. "I _really_ hope he was trying to be humorous and failing miserably. If he's serious…I think he has rocks in his head. In any event, it does not matter…I'll just ignore it. Sorry, what did you say, Anikka?"

"Your kitty won't play with us! Kolfinnia keeps moving!" Anikka held up the offending cat to Elsa, who laughed and took Kolfinnia and just held her close.

"He says he hopes your leg heals quickly because he wants to dance with you. And…" Anna's voice trailed off, and her amused expression morphed into a scowl. "I'll kill him for writing this," she nearly growled. Anna sighed as she looked up at Elsa. Elsa was just holding Kofinnia on her lap, trying to show Anikka that she should be gentle with the cat, and it was obvious to Anna that Elsa had completely moved on from the dumb letter. "Kristoff, look at this," Anna whispered, pointing at a few offending lines in the letter.

"So? She doesn't care, Anna. She probably didn't even notice what he said. Look, she's moved on already-she's perfectly fine." Kristoff nodded towards Elsa, who was now holding both Anikka and the cat.

"But…but he used some…not entirely innocent language. Not nasty stuff, it sounds like he's trying to be romantic, but…he implied he wants _children_ with her!" Anna's voice was quiet, but she was fuming. After what had almost happened to Elsa, that letter made her even angrier than she might have been otherwise.

Emily let out a snort half-disguised as a cough. "Don't think Elsa needs a guy for that. It looks to me she's already a mother," she pointed out, gesturing at little Anikka, who was now standing beside Elsa asking if she could please try to hold the kitty again.

"I hear you talking about me," Elsa deadpanned from her spot on the sofa, but she didn't look irritated or mad, just slightly amused. The amused expression disappeared as she gazed straight at her little sister. "Anna, you don't need to worry about the letter. I've told that man repeatedly that I am not interested, so I can ignore it without being rude. It's okay, really. Don't worry about it." She winced and tensed up when Anikka half-sat on her injured leg. "Anikka, please get off. _Now._ That hurts," she said quietly.

Anikka immediately hopped up and just gave the older girl a hug. "Really, really sorry. When's it gonna not hurt anymore? Soon?" she asked hopefully. "I want t' dance with you. At the party thingie!"

Elsa sighed and didn't say anything for a moment, since she honestly didn't know exactly, but also knew quite well she was not going to be doing any dancing of any kind at that party. "Awhile longer yet, but it's all right. You'll have to ask someone else to dance with you, okay?" _I can't dance anyway…_

"I don't wanna dance with someone else."

"Well, then you are going to be disappointed. I'm sorry, Anikka. Broken bones don't heal in just a few days, even considering magic rules. And," Elsa added, giving the little girl a lopsided smile, "before you ask, Rapunzel cannot heal it. Magic limits and rules." She looked up to see Kai standing in front of her, looking rather too serious for her liking. "Anikka, go back and play with Eliot. Be nice to the kitty. Kai, is something wrong?"

"Yes, Queen Elsa, there is. I should like to request an important meeting with you and your sister and her fiancée immediately, if you would be willing." Kai usually wasn't quite so formal with Elsa, but he was hoping that that might make her realize he was being quite serious. "I've already asked Gerda to send your mother and uncle, and Erik up here."

Elsa sighed but nodded. She knew exactly what this was about. "If everyone but Anna and Kristoff could please leave the library for now, that would be much appreciated."

* * *

"I just can't condone killing them," Elsa repeated for what felt to her like the umpteenth time a few minutes later. "Erik, you and Kristoff rescued me in time before they…did anything."

"Queen Elsa, that is hardly the point," Erik told her. "The fact is that they assaulted a helpless innocent with intent to molest and kill her, pardon my bluntness. Two innocents if we count what you stopped them from trying to do to the princess. Yes, Princess Anna explained what happened. They were not even 'just' trying to steal money from you or something."

"But both my sister and I are fine," Elsa pointed out frustratingly.

"Well, if you read your lessons properly, Elsa, you'd remember that intent matters," Anna said huffily. "The point is that if Olaf _hadn't_ managed to get help fast enough, if you _hadn't_ come to help me, we would both be dead. Which makes what they attempted treason, which ALWAYS means the right to inv…invoke the death penalty."

"They are not citizens of Arendelle, so they can't commit treason, because Arendelle isn't their country. And Anna, I told you before, just because I have the right to invoke the death penalty doesn't mean it's right to do so." Elsa met her little impromptu council's gaze straight on, but she was wringing her hands nervously, and she could feel her magic growing agitated. There were uncomfortable icy butterflies in her stomach. _What am I supposed to do? I don't want to be responsible for taking people's lives. That isn't right._ "Don't they deserve a second chance?" _You gave me a second chance, Anna._

"This was, like, probably their umpteenth chance, Elsa. They're terrorists in their own country," Kristoff said. "I may not know much about laws and such, but I do know that letting them live is dangerous to the public and a waste of money. What if they somehow escape again? You can't even have them work off the cost of their food because it's not safe to have them out of the dungeon. They could try to hurt or kill someone again." Knowing telling Elsa her own safety was in danger was not going to convince her of a single thing, Kristoff decided to pull out the only trump card he knew Elsa would listen to. "Those men going after Anna the first time was not your fault, but if you let them live and they somehow hurt her or another girl again, it _will_ be partly your fault. You're supposed to be the protector of our realm to the best of your ability. Right now that means eliminating the threat."

Elsa couldn't help cringing at that statement. Somewhere deep inside, her inner dark streak rather _wanted_ to order the death sentence, and that fact actually scared her. Executing someone couldn't possibly be right…could it? She still remembered only too well the awful terror of knowing _exactly_ what those men had wanted to do to her and feeling absolutely helpless to stop it. She'd refused to give them the satisfaction of making her beg for them to stop and go away, knowing it wouldn't have done any good whatsoever, but inside her mind had been begging and screaming in fear. And it wasn't exactly the same feelings that accompanied those panic attacks, either…it was something else that she couldn't quite name or explain, similar but definitely not the same. Mostly because she had been a hundred percent aware of what was going on around her, unlike when she had a panic attack and wasn't completely aware of reality around her, at least not properly. _I can't risk another girl having to feel like that and nobody getting to her in time. Especially Anna. It's just...what if they could change? Like Hans is still be full of himself and I can never trust him, but I know he isn't the same man that tried to kill Anna and me last year, either._

"Elsa, you don't have to execute them yourself," Thomas spoke up suddenly, his voice gentle. "Nor do you even have to be present when the deed is done."

"If someone doesn't have the guts to deliver the sentence themselves, she shouldn't order it in the first place," Elsa said firmly. That was something she felt very strongly about for some reason, and she wasn't really sure why. It just felt wrong to her to order a sentence she wouldn't carry out personally.

Thomas nodded. "Yes, the reigning monarch delivering the death blow is actually a popular tradition, Elsa, especially for crimes against the Crown, but it isn't law in any way. You know that."

"It should be law. I don't think it's right to order someone else to do something I wouldn't do myself. Especially something like that." Elsa had her arms wrapped around her middle now, hugging herself, but she sat up straight and didn't flinch or cry. "Maybe I could just send them back to the United States to be tried as terrorists there…"

"You can't, Elsa. They can't get out of our borders without magic because of Pabbie's cloaking procedure, and the _last_ things we or any other country need are criminals with magic," Kristoff said quickly.

Elsa sighed again and said nothing. That was true. No way was she sending those men anywhere with temporary water powers. No way.

"We don't have to torture them to get rid of 'em, Queen Elsa," Erik added. "There are…humane methods. Not that they deserve even that, but…"

Anna said what Elsa was thinking. "How do we know whether it's humane or not when nobody lives to tell the tale?" She sounded more curious than disturbed. Elsa shuddered beside her, and Anna put one arm around her and gave her a hug.

Both Erik and Kai stifled a chuckle. "Erik didn't say it would cause _no_ pain, princess," Kai told her. "He just means we don't have to burn them alive or something. If careful, a person being hanged will die almost instantly, for example. Goodness, your sister could probably kill them instantly with her magic if she so chose."

Elsa shook her head hard. The idea of using her magic to kill others, even if it was a richly-deserved death sentence, was abhorrent to her. If she did that she would probably never allow herself to live down what she had done. Not after hurting her precious little sister twice. _But using your powers to execute dangerous criminals isn't the same, Elsa. That isn't losing control or anything of the sort,_ a tiny darkly logical thought informed her. _You could easily knock them out instantly first and they wouldn't even feel it. Or an icicle to the heart would do it._ "We could have them stand trial in front of a jury," Elsa said, feeling shaky at her own thoughts. "To give them a chance."

Erik frowned at the young queen. "What chance, my queen? There is nothing they can argue that will make any sane jury say they aren't guilty."

Knowing Elsa's reasoning for suggesting trial by jury, Kai put in, "Also, they _will_ end up with a worse punishment than you want them to. Your jury will be loyal to the Crown, and most likely, they would love to sentence people like that to a fate worse than death before actually executing them. And, quite frankly, they would deserve it, too."

"Elsa, how about we put it to a vote? Right now?" Idun suggested, giving her daughter's cold hand a gentle squeeze.

Elsa jerked her hand away, her blue eyes bright with unshed tears. "What good would that be? I think we all know exactly how a vote like that would come out. Six to one, in favor of execution. _Maybe_ five to two, since you haven't said anything until now, Mama. In any event, it wouldn't matter. You have all made it very clear what you think," she said flatly. "This discussion is over, at least for now." _Keep it together, Elsa. You cannot cry or none of them will take you seriously at all._

 _I…I know what needs to be done and I just can't do it._

 _I can't._

* * *

Anna debated between following Elsa and leaving her be for less than a minute before hopping up and running out into the hall to find her. That wasn't difficult, since Elsa hadn't made it to her room yet. "Don't worry, Elsa, I didn't follow you to fuss at you for leaving. I just want to make sure you're ok," she said quickly. Without waiting for a reply, Anna just picked Elsa up, crutches and all, and carried her the rest of the way to her room.

Elsa didn't say anything until Anna had put her down on her bed. "You know I could have gotten here on my own," she said, giving Anna a lopsided smile.

"I know, but I also know your leg still hurts a lot, even if you won't say so, and it looked like you were having trouble. So. I helped," Anna said simply, plopping down beside her. She hesitated for a moment before continuing with what she wanted to say. "Elsa, you know what I'd do if I were in your shoes right now. And what I think you SHOULD do. But I'm sorry for pushing you and getting everyone to gang up on you like we did. I love you so much, and I just don't want people that want to hurt you like that around anymore. That's…that's all. I won't talk about it anymore tonight, I promise."

Elsa was quiet for a minute before simply saying, "Anna, I can't in good conscience go down to the dungeon and kill multiple people. It just feels so _wrong_." She looked up at Anna hesitantly and added, her voice shaky, "Doesn't that make me just as bad as they are? To take their lives away like that?"

"Of course not. Remember what Kristoff told you? That you're supposed to be the 'protector of our realm'?" Anna paused before continuing, "And Uncle Thomas was right. You don't have to do it yourself, or be present, for that matter."

But Elsa shook her head firmly. "It's not right to order the death sentence and not carry it out yourself. I just…I _know_ what I should do, and I _can't_." _I spent so long trying_ not _to hurt anyone, and now I'm supposed to voluntarily?_ "I've already hurt you twice, and nearly did a third time when dark-me was in control. I…I would have killed those Weselton guards in my ice palace last year if Hans, of all people, hadn't stopped me…" _And, speaking of Hans, it isn't fair to those criminals in the dungeon now if they get executed and Hans didn't for a similar crime…_ "And dark-me wanted to just obliterate all of the bad people in the world with no remorse whatsoever."

Elsa involuntarily flinched, her expression pained, when she heard Anna's quiet matter-of-fact question. "What?"

"I said, is there some bit of you that actually _wants_ to give them the death sentence, and you're scared by that?" Anna repeated in the same quiet voice. She took Elsa by the hands and just held them reassuringly, trying to help the older girl stay calm and explain how she felt. _It's all right, Elsa. Really. Nobody could possibly blame you for that if I'm guessing right._

"Yes…no…I don't know," was Elsa's stammered response. "I don't know _at all_! The fact that everyone is telling me to listen to something that sounds absolutely horrible that dark-me would happily do scares me. Dark-me almost hurt _you!_ She's awful, awful, awful! I don't want to be like that! How can my dark streak be right? Shouldn't that automatically mean it's the wrong thing to do? And then there's the rest of me screaming that killing someone, even a just execution, is horrible and wrong and I'm a terrible person for even considering it. They're human beings too, even if they attempted something horrible." Elsa's blue eyes filled with tears as she touched one hand to her neck. "And yet…I remember when that one man was choking me and I couldn't do a thing to make him stop. Anna, I was _so scared_. I tried to pull his hands away and I couldn't and I couldn't breathe and everything just…went black. I…I d-don't want anyone else to feel helpless and terrified like that! Or even risk it! They almost hurt you, too!"

Anna just pulled Elsa close and hugged her tightly. This was the first she had heard any details about what had happened directly from Elsa, and it made her feel sick. "They are never going to hurt you again, Elsa. I _promise_ ," she said fervently. Right then, Anna made herself a promise too: if Elsa would not order the death sentence, _she_ was going to do it herself, no matter what Elsa said. So there. Elsa seemed to have mostly calmed herself down already, but she was clutching Anna's arm and wouldn't let go. "What d'you want me to do?" Anna asked softly.

"Nothing. I'll be fine." Elsa hesitated and took a deep breath before adding, "Well, just…would you…maybe…stay with me tonight? Please?" _I know I'm supposed to be better now and I know I can be fine on my own, but I just don't want to be alone._

"Of course. I'll go put on my nightclothes and come right back." Anna made sure her voice stayed light, even though she was rather worried about Elsa. _I am not going to make her feel 'not strong enough' for wanting someone to stay with her. So there._

Instantly Elsa relaxed and she gave Anna a genuine smile. "Thank you very, very much."

* * *

 _She was lying somewhere dark and uncomfortable. She felt glued to the floor._

 _…can't move…Olaf, get help. please. …don't understand…_

 _"Elsa, help!"_

 _What is Anna doing here? I'm sorry, Anna, I_ can't move _! Elsa tried to speak up, but something seemed to be preventing her from making any noise._

 _"See, I told you she's pathetic. Pretty, but pathetic. She's not going to do a thing."_

 _I would if I could just_ do _something! Anna, please understand. I'm right here, and I…I…what is going on?_

 _My ice isn't working. And…and something hurts really, really bad._

 _"Don't hurt Elsa!"_

 _"Fine, take her place, then."_

 _No! No, Anna, don't do that! Please don't. Please…_

 _I still can't make a sound. I can't even scream._

 _… …_

 _"So weak, Elsa. You should have killed us when you had the chance. Now we'll take care of you, too."_

Elsa woke up screaming a few seconds later.

* * *

"Elsa! Elsa, it's all right. Please wake up, Elsa, please wake up!" Anna had woken up almost instantly because the room had gotten so cold, but Elsa wasn't waking up easily, and that scared her. Elsa rarely had nightmares anymore; sure, it happened sometimes, which Anna thought was normal, but not like this. Usually she would wake up crying, not screaming like that. It sounded like someone or something was torturing her. Shivering in the frigid room, Anna quickly lit the kerosene lamp on the nightstand and went to get all the blankets from the high shelf in Elsa's closet. _Maybe lots of warmth will help now, just like before. 'Sides, I'm freezing._ Anna wrapped one of the blankets around herself like a cape before putting the other three around Elsa. "Shh, whatever it was wasn't and isn't real," she said quietly.

"No…Anna…Anna's _dead_. I couldn't…I couldn't do anything!" Elsa was still only half-awake, and she tried to push Anna away, not really believing that her little sister was really there and in one piece; but Anna refused to move. Elsa felt something soft tucked into her tense, frost-covered arms, and calmed a bit when she saw the two dolls Anna had given her the summer before. _Anna's…okay? I'm safe? In my room?_

"Elsa, you're safe. I'm safe. Nobody killed me or hurt you," Anna assured her. She frowned when the older girl flinched and cringed away from her touch, as if she were scared something might hurt her again. "It's just me, Anna," she said softly. Anna made sure both hands were where Elsa could see them, holding them up but not actually touching her. "Is it all right to hold you?"

Elsa slowly nodded, her big blue eyes haunted. _Elsa, it's just Anna. That…that horrible, awful thing was a dream. Not real._ She still didn't relax, but Anna felt warm, and the weight of the blankets felt soft and reassuring to her. _Anna is right here. She's safe. We're both safe. So there._

Once she was sure Elsa wasn't going to panic at being touched, Anna gently pulled her close, making sure to be careful of Elsa's broken leg. Anna was actually quite sure what her sister's nightmare had been about, and she didn't ask, deciding to just wait for Elsa to talk on her own. "See, Elsa, we're both fine. No nasty creeps. Just us in here and our friends and family in nearby rooms."

Elsa gave a shuddering sigh and burrowed deeper into the nice warm blankets until all Anna could see was a bit of platinum hair peeking out. _Thank you, Anna. My leg really, really hurts right now, but I'm okay. I think._ Elsa's racing heart slowed, and she closed her eyes as she tried her best to relax. _We're fine. It was just a dream. An, awful, awful one, but a dream all the same._

 _Elsa, that won't be 'just a dream' if you don't do something about it,_ a little voice prodded. _Do you want something like that to actually happen? Or even risk it?_ "Anna?"

"I'm right here, Elsa," Anna said quickly.

"Death sentence," came Elsa's shaky but firm reply.

"Ok." Anna was more than a little concerned just what Elsa's pessimistic mind had come up with that had made her decide that all of a sudden, but she honestly wasn't sure she wanted to know. _I should try to get Elsa to talk. That usually helps her feel better._ "Do you want to talk about it?"

"You were there. You took my place, all for nothing because then they hurt me anyway." _Anna is right here, and we are both fine. It didn't happen. It didn't._ Elsa suddenly grew aware that it was still freezing cold in her room, and she struggled to return the temperature back to normal. _She didn't even mention I lost control and made the temperature like this. Anna's shivering._ That thought, that she was the cause of making Anna cold again, just made the temperature drop back down, and she tried to pull away. "Anna, you have to leave, I…I can calm down by myself. I d-don't want to risk hurting you again," Elsa said softly.

Anna let her sister pull away but tugged her back when the older girl tried to stand up. "You come back here, Elsa. You can't walk right now. I won't touch you if you don't want me to, but I am _not_ leaving," she said firmly. "I know you can calm down by yourself, but I also know you'll feel better much faster if someone helps. And if your powers were going to hurt me, they would have done it already. Like when you were screaming and not even awake yet. So there."

Elsa's pale cheeks turned red in embarrassment, but she nodded and curled back up under the covers, putting all the blankets Anna had wrapped around her in a pile between her and Anna. _There. Maybe that will help. And…what if someone else besides Anna heard me? Although…I suppose everyone knows already that I have nightmares sometimes. And Anna told me that was normal._ The temperature slowly reverted back to normal, but Elsa knew there were tiny snowflakes floating around her, and those wouldn't go away. "I…I don't know why, but the snowflakes won't l-leave," she whispered. _And my leg hurts really, really badly. I wish it would stop._

"That's all right. They're just snowflakes." Anna held out one hand questioningly, and she smiled when Elsa nodded to say it was all right to touch her. Elsa was slightly cooler than normal, but she wasn't too cold to touch anymore. "See, Elsa? You aren't even all cold anymore. The snowflakes can stay. They aren't hurting anything."

"They did…that! They _hurt_ you and I couldn't do anything. You tried to call me for help and I didn't do anything. They were hurting me and you took my place. You _died_ right in front of me! I couldn't move, I…I-I couldn't even say anything!"

Anna's stomach turned when she realized just what Elsa meant. _Good grief, Elsa, when you have a nightmare, you really have a horrible one,_ she thought bitterly. "It didn't happen. See, I'm fine, and so are you. No creeps doing unimaginable horrid things to us," she told her. Anna hugged Elsa again, frowning at the way the older girl's hair was sticking to the back of her neck. _You must have been really, really scared if it made you get all sweaty when it was so cold in here,_ Anna thought, but she didn't tell Elsa that.

"It must not be unimaginable considering my pessimistic self just dreamed it," Elsa deadpanned. She felt mostly okay again, and she was very relieved to see that the snowflakes she hadn't been able to get rid of were gone now. _I'm…actually okay now. But I know one thing: I will not risk that actually happening for real._

Anna didn't think that was the least bit funny, but she was delighted that her older sister's deadpan snark was back. Besides, the upset snowflakes were gone. "Let's try to get you back to sleep without any more horrid nightmares," she mumbled, half to Elsa and half to herself.

"I second that," Elsa replied sleepily. Now that she felt completely calm again, she was also exhausted, and she was quickly drifting back to sleep. "Thank…y'…Anna. For…helping."

"You don't have to say thank you for that, Elsa."

* * *

Elsa had no intentions of making a public spectacle of the criminals in the dungeon, but early the next morning, she still wrote up exactly what they were accused-and guilty-of, and then jerked Anna awake. "Anna, if I'm going to do this, I need to do it before I lose my nerve. Can…can you please come with me?"

Anna didn't wake up immediately, but once she realized what Elsa wanted, she was up in a flash. "I'm surprised you didn't change your mind, but I'm glad you decided on what I think is the right thing to do," she told Elsa. "And…you're wearing _that_?"

Elsa looked down at her steel blue long-sleeve dress and nodded. It was one of the ones Anna referred to as 'stuffy', and it covered her from neck to toes, but Elsa just didn't want those men to see her in her ice-dress again. "Yes," she said shortly, "and I'll change later, because I'll get too hot. But not right now."

"You pinned your hair up," Anna pointed out (rather accusingly, Elsa thought).

"Maybe I want it up."

"You do not. Here, Elsa, put this on instead," Anna said, pulling Elsa's silvery white ice-dress out of her closet.

Elsa looked horrified at that suggestion. "I most certainly will not! Come on, Anna, please just come on. I have the papers all written out already. I just want to get this over with."

Anna scowled. "They'll think they really hurt you inside if you show up in what you're wearing. And I'm not going to have that. At least put on your cobalt blue ice-dress or something. Please? Better yet, just put on your usual ice-dress. You like saying things without saying anything aloud. Well, do it now, and make sure the message is 'You didn't succeed in hurting me and I'm executing you because it's the right thing to do for everyone', not 'You scared me and I'm executing you so you don't hurt me again'."

"They did scare me," Elsa muttered, looking away. "That awful, awful dream is what changed my mind. Being helpless to protect you, let alone myself, was just horrible. I won't have that happen to you or anyone else just because I didn't have the guts to eliminate the threat." _I won't. I just won't._

* * *

"I'll…be fine, Anna. Just please stay right there. It…won't take long." Elsa had first wanted Anna to come with her, but she didn't want Anna to watch. "Kai and Kristoff and the guards will be with me. It'll be perfectly safe."

Kristoff nodded. "I'll do it myself if I think she's in danger, Anna, I promise."

Anna hesitated but then nodded and leaned against the wall leading into the Great Hall. "All right. I'll stay here. But if you take too long, I'm following you."

Elsa took a deep breath before nodding, keeping the papers she'd written up clutched in her fist. _They're getting all wrinkled, Elsa, calm down._

 _I don't want to do this._

 _Elsa, you have to. You have to protect Anna and everyone else. You're not doing anything wrong._

 _Yes, I am! Killing people is wrong!_

 _Shut up. You're not going to…to torture them. It'll be all over in a second._

Elsa's thoughts raced as she made her way to the dais. Although only the criminals, the guards holding them, and Kristoff and Kai were there; she felt like the whole world was staring at her. She felt Kai giving her shoulder a gentle squeeze, asking in a whisper if she was okay, and she just shook her head. _No, I'm not okay. I feel sick._

"Miss Elsa, you know you can still change your mind and let one of the guards carry out your orders," Kai told her quietly. "Nobody will think any less of you for it."

"No, I have to do this myself. I have to." Elsa's pale face was clearly determined, but she also looked upset and frightened. Her gaze fell on the man that had tried to choke her, and he looked back steadily, not appearing sorry at all. _He doesn't even look a little bit sorry and guilty for what he did. The others don't either._ Only two of them looked even remotely worried. Elsa took a deep breath before glancing down at her paper and then saying, "You are charged with a direct attack on the Crown, and two counts of assault with intent to molest and then murder the victim. How do you plead?" _Don't break down, Elsa. You can't. It'll all be over in a few minutes. You know they'll probably say 'guilty' because they're not sorry for what they did and will be happy to claim it._

"Not guilty."

"WHAT?!" Kristoff growled, making everyone jump. "I was there! I saw you practically on top of her! You would've done who knows what if nobody had gotten there in time!" He turned to Elsa, face red in anger. "El-Queen Elsa, why bother with the formality? We all know they are guilty! Just…do it and be done with it."

"What do you think she's going to do, mountain man? Kill us?"

Kristoff only crossed his arms. "Exactly," he shot back, hoping beyond hope that Elsa wouldn't back out at the last minute.

Elsa was still sitting perfectly straight on her throne, but she was fiddling with her skirt nervously, and she was tense all over. "I sentence you to death for the crimes just described. Do you have any last words?" Elsa could feel her voice shake, and that just made her feel worse. _Come on, Elsa, hold it together. You have to._

"You can't just do that! We demand a trial-a trial by jury!"

"She can and she just did," Kai said firmly. "The reigning monarch of Arendelle has absolute power. She could sentence you to the most painful end known to man and it would be completely legal." He glanced toward Elsa, but she had shrunk back in her seat like she wanted to disappear, and there were a few tiny snowflakes floating around her.

The temperature, however, had not dropped.

Kai went on, staring the criminals directly in their faces, "If Queen Elsa grants you the right to a trial by jury, you will receive the same sentence and it will most certainly not be quick. She is the only one in this room who cares a whit whether you live or die. The rest of us would quite eagerly give you the same attitude you gave her, without the sick fantasies, that is. I do not know what you think you are accomplishing here. This country loves its queen and nobody will stand for you treating her or any other member of the royal family like you did. Now, Her Majesty has asked if you have any last words. Answer her."

"Or any family you would like to write to," came Elsa's quiet voice. She involuntarily flinched when she heard the only reply. " _Nobody_ would enjoy that, and you know it. You wanted to kill me. I never, ever did anything to make you want to hurt me that way, except for rescuing my little sister from you," she added.

"You sure didn't fight back much."

Erik backhanded the man so hard he stumbled backwards. "The queen was injured and exhausted, you idiot! Without easy access to her powers, she was just-pardon me, Queen Elsa-a little slip of a girl. What do you think she was supposed to be able to do against multiple people twice as big as she is? In any event, it seems to me she defended herself enough that you lot were unsuccessful in…doing the unthinkable before help arrived. You are the weak ones, not her. Maybe you should be deeply insulted that a young woman defended herself from all of you without her magic." He looked up at Elsa and just said, "Queen Elsa, do just get on with it before I do it myself. This riffraff doesn't have anything useful to say."

Elsa nodded and held out her paper to Kai wordlessly. She would have her witnesses sign it first. All too soon for Elsa, that was done, and all that was left was to carry out her words. _Elsa, just…just do it. Let your dark side handle it. She can do this. She's strong enough. An icicle to the heart will do the job instantly._ Elsa could feel her hands shaking, and she just wanted to sink through the floor. Or run out of the room. Or just…disappear.

"We shall be honored to carry out your sentence, Queen Elsa," Erik said, sensing that something was wrong. He honestly didn't understand why Elsa was so hesitant, but he also knew she had decided she wanted to do the deed herself.

"No, I…all the guards step back." Once she was sure all the guards were out of the way, Elsa let the first icicle fly and just scrunched her eyes shut, cringing back in her seat. _Now do the others, Elsa. Then you can go get Anna and try to forget about this whole thing._ She gasped when she peeked up at what she'd done-the icicle had gone right _through_ her instantly-dead target and was embedded in the opposite wall. Before she could really process what she was seeing, she quickly sent the other icicles flying before she could rethink what she was doing. That paper had her signature on it and she had witnesses and she had given her word to Anna; she could not and would not back out now.

Elsa didn't think she would ever forget the look of pure terror in her assailant's eyes the instant he had realized what was about to happen…a second before the icicle claimed his life. She blanched as she stared in horror at the dead bodies lying on the floor. After the first icicle had gone clear across the room, she had been careful not to let that happen again; she did not not not want bloody holes all over the wall as a reminder of this. No, now she just had a sickening image seared in her head of all of those criminals lying on the floor with _her_ ice sticking out of their chests. Elsa felt like her head was spinning, but she couldn't tear her eyes away. _What have I done?_

"Men, get the corpses out of here. Now," Kai ordered the guards quickly, purposely moving directly in front of Elsa. "One of you make sure the princess doesn't see this. I know Queen Elsa doesn't want that." He turned his attention to Kristoff and just jerked his head toward Elsa. _You take care of her._

Kristoff nodded and headed for Elsa. "You did good, you know. How about we go find Anna?" he said quietly. Kristoff tried to help Elsa stand up, but she jerked away, wrapping her arms around her middle.

"I killed them!" she whispered, sounding completely horrified and surprised. "The…the _holes_ …I…I'm not squeamish, but…"

"Hey, they didn't suffer, Elsa. They dropped instantly." Kristoff honestly wouldn't have cared if they had suffered before dying, but he knew telling Elsa that wouldn't help. "You saw how they reacted when you tried to give them a chance to talk. They weren't sorry, didn't even admit they had done anything wrong. You did the right thing."

Tears filled Elsa's blue eyes and trickled down her cheeks as she buried her face in her hands. _I spent so long trying not to hurt anyone with my magic and now I purposely killed multiple people. And it was…easy. Too easy. It literally took less than five seconds. And those men, horrible as they are…were…they have families. What will they think? They won't even know what happened._ Elsa could see the guards taking the dead criminals out of the Great Hall, and it made her feel sick and horrible. "What have I d-done?"

"The right thing," Kristoff said firmly. He felt awkward trying to help Elsa, and he wished Anna would run in and help instead. Was he supposed to just pick her up and take her out of the Great Hall, or was he supposed to talk to her and let her leave on her own?

 _I'm going to be sick._ "I…I have to get out of here," she muttered, struggling to stand up. Elsa's good leg buckled under her, making her lose her balance, and she would have fallen if Kristoff hadn't caught her. "I'm sorry! I'm really, really sorry!"

Kristoff frowned and just uncertainly gave her a quick hug, not understanding why she was trying to apologize. "Will you please ask Anna to come?" Kristoff asked Kai. "I have no idea what I should do here…" It didn't feel right to him to be giving Elsa a hug, and yet he was quite certain that that was exactly what Elsa needed right then. The young ice mage was shaking like a leaf and she looked pale, even for her. "Elsa, I don't know what you want me to do."

"I need Anna…please? I-I'm going to be sick. Get away from me!"

Kai shook his head and just pushed Kristoff aside. "Young man, don't be ridiculous. We just need to get her out of here," he said firmly, scooping Elsa up before she could protest. "Open the door, please." He carried Elsa out of the Great Hall and deposited her next to Anna, who was arguing with the guard that was keeping her from going into the Great Hall in the first place. "Miss Anna, you and your fiancée take your sister upstairs and make her lie down. Clear her head. I will help the guards clean up down here."

"Elsa, it's all right, really. Don't feel bad for throwing up," Anna told Elsa again as she carefully settled the older girl on her bed a few minutes later. "It's not your fault, and it was just the floor downstairs anyways, not a carpet or rug. Kristoff, go out in the hall for a minute please. I wanna get Elsa out of that uncomfortable dress and she won't want you in here, obviously."

Elsa didn't resist, her mind still focused on the previous events of the morning. She knew Anna would not hurt her and so she didn't care. "They're dead, Anna, because of me," she whispered. _Elsa, stop it. Stop it stop it stop it. You did what you had to do, remember?_

"They are not. They're dead because of their own actions, not yours." Anna dropped Elsa's dress right there on the floor and then hesitated, not quite sure what to do. _I'll just let Elsa change when she gets up by herself later,_ Anna decided. She knew Elsa didn't like putting her 'normal clothes' chemise under her ice-dresses, of course, and she was not going to invade her sister's privacy, so there. "You lay down, Elsa. Kai said I should make you lie down so you can clear your head some."

"I _killed_ them!" Elsa buried her face in her hands again, and she wished she hadn't let everyone talk her into agreeing to the whole thing. Except…it hadn't been everyone else. It had been that horrible dream, and that thought just made her feel worse. _I let my fear control me again. What have I done? And I can't even undo what I did this morning._

 _You shouldn't want to undo what you did this morning, Elsa. You didn't want them to hurt Anna, did you?_

Anna gently tucked Elsa under the covers and gave her shoulder a squeeze. "You didn't kill them. You executed them, fair and just. Would you like me to undo your hair? Nobody wants to sleep on hairpins."

 _That's the same thing,_ Elsa thought, but she just nodded and lay still while Anna let her hair loose from its bun. She could feel tears burning in her eyes again, her pulse racing, and she scrunched her eyes shut, trying not to let them fall. _I…I feel horrible. I don't even know why I feel so bad about this. I know I did the right thing. They weren't even sorry._ "He looked so scared, Anna. The leader, I suppose, the one that tried to choke me. He probably felt the same way I did when he tried to hurt me. He thought I wouldn't do it," she said softly. "Right before, he and the others had been saying…things. He didn't think I'd do it. And…and I killed him!"

"Oh, Elsa…" Anna had no idea what to say to that, let alone understand why Elsa was so upset. Those creeps SHOULD feel scared after hurting Elsa like that, in her opinion. She looked up when she heard a light knock on the door. "Yeah, you can come back now, Kristoff," Anna called. "She's upset because she says one of them looked scared right…before. Because he didn't think she would follow through with it. When's Elsa going to be ok again?"

Elsa just stared at the wall and didn't react. Kristoff frowned. "Just give her a chance. It's not like she's a battle-hardened soldier or something." He paused and tugged Anna out into the hall for a moment. "Anna, Elsa told you to stay out of the Great Hall for a reason. She didn't want you to see, and I don't think it was because she didn't want you to see _her_."

Anna glanced back into her sister's room, frowning. _She didn't want me to see those stupid creeps killed. Or, most likely, the…aftermath…_ "Um…just how did Elsa execute 'em?" she whispered.

"I'm not telling you that, Anna. You can ask her yourself if you want to know. I'll just say it was instant. My point is she saw multiple people lying dead from her own hand." Kristoff didn't add about the icicle flying clear across the whole hall. "I imagine that image is pretty stuck in her head right now, especially since she's tried so long _not_ to hurt anyone. It's not nice to see such a thing in any circumstances, even if you _are_ used to such sights, and she's just, you know…Elsa."

Anna's blue-green eyes were filled with tears, not for the dead criminals but for Elsa. "What am I supposed to do?" _I think Elsa knows she did the right thing, but she's still hurting and upset about it._

"I don't know. I just thought you ought to know why she's all shocked like that. Maybe we could take her somewhere later…?"

"Like a picnic? Maybe we could take Anikka out to the pool or something. Oh wait, that won't work, not with Elsa's leg hurt…but I could take her out to the gardens. I'll just carry her." With that idea solidified in her mind, Anna stood on her tiptoes to give Kristoff a thank-you kiss. "Thank you so much!" Then she ran back over to Elsa.

Elsa flinched when she felt something touch her, but she relaxed when she realized it was just Anna. At least Anna and everyone else…and okay, her…were safe. "Anna?"

"Right here. Here, I'll read to you, all right?" Anna helped Elsa sit up partway leaning against the pillows and just wrapped one arm around her; then reached for the book lying on the nightstand. "Really, Elsa?! You're reading an ol' science physics book for fun?"

Elsa didn't smile, but she relaxed further and leaned against Anna's shoulder. She felt Anna squeeze her reassuringly, and her eyes inexplicably teared up again. _What is wrong with me? Anna is right here. She understands. She's not picking on me for caring about those…those awful men. She doesn't think I'm stupid. She's teasing me about my book, just like she would any other time._

"Do you want me to read?"

 _Yes._ Elsa nodded but didn't say anything. She brushed her hair out of her face and turned the page to where she had left off. _Right there, Anna, okay?_

"All right." Although Anna was not particularly interested in Elsa's book, if Elsa wanted her to read, then she was going to read. So there. At least she didn't seem to be outright crying anymore. 'Force is an influence tending to change the motion of a body or produce motion or stress in a stationary body. The magnitude of such an influence is often calculated by multiplying...' Elsa, you probably know all this already, you stinker!"

Elsa didn't reply, but she smiled a bit. That was kind of true, but not completely. It wasn't like she had the whole book memorized or anything!

Anna continued reading for awhile and then closed the book. Elsa was half asleep, and she didn't seem tense or anything anymore. "We're going to eat lunch outside in the gardens, Elsa. Would you like to go out there now? We could make flower chains and climb trees and stuff."

Elsa giggled, much to Anna's surprise, and just pointed at her injured leg. _I don't think I am going to be doing any tree climbing, Anna, but thank you for helping me feel a little better._

Anna had realized just what she had suggested right before Elsa's amused reaction and had been inwardly smacking herself for doing that-what if Elsa had gotten upset?-but now she grinned. Then she realized Elsa still hadn't said anything aloud, and she made a face. "Elsa, why won't you talk?" she asked quietly.

A tiny shrug. _I don't know._

"Well, I'm still going to talk to you anyways. Do you want to go outside now?"

* * *

Elsa was surprised when Erik stopped her and Anna in the entrance hall. "Queen Elsa, may I have a moment to speak with you?" Erik asked, glancing pointedly at the princess. Anna got the message, but she only stepped right outside, leaving the doors open. At Elsa's quizzical look, the guard just said, "I think we all know you did not wish for the princess to witness the executions earlier, that's all."

Elsa just waited politely and didn't reply beyond a small nod.

"We have our own debriefing sessions should someone have to carry out an unpleasant duty. This we did this morning after you left. You must talk to someone, my queen, or it'll eat you up inside. If you'll pardon my saying so, I know you haven't done that. You're already not talking." Erik hesitated, seeing a growing expression of irritation and embarrassment on the young queen's face despite her efforts not to react. "Please don't think I'm merely telling you this because you're some weak pansy girl or something, because we all know that isn't true. I've seen grown men, trained soldiers, react the exact same way you did this morning, right down to retching afterward. You can't let it get you down. You carried out your duty, nothing more."

Elsa turned bright red at the mention of her losing her stomach earlier and bit her lip hard, but she managed to hold Erik's gaze without ending up looking at the floor or something similar. "I made my sister stay out of the Great Hall for a reason," she whispered after a long silence. _I will not burden her with those awful images or how doing that made me feel so horrible. I did that enough already when I was still all…weirded out earlier._

"Nobody's suggesting you talk to Princess Anna," Erik said quickly. "Talk to someone that was there. Kai, your sister's fiancée, me or one of the other guards. Anyone will do. I can assure you that none of my comrades would think less of you for it. Rather, we are all impressed you had the backbone to do what needed to be done. Especially since, well, we all know you hate hurting others and are quite honestly far too merciful sometimes. Just…please consider it. You have thousands of subjects in Arendelle that need you."

"I'll not force someone else to hear me rehash…that," Elsa said firmly, her voice stronger.

"That's why you should talk to someone that was there. They will have already seen everything." When Elsa nodded, Erik bowed politely to take his leave, but then added with a scowl, "Also, Queen Elsa, I beg of you, please banish that ex-prince, or execute him too for all I care. He's been harassing several of us asking how to get a castle job."

This made Elsa frown. "No worries. That will not happen. Thank you for your concern about my welfare," she said quietly.

* * *

"Sooo, Elsa, what was that all about?" Anna asked awhile later after they had been sitting outside in the gardens under a big shady tree for awhile. "Does Erik like you or something? Isn't he kind of just a bit old for you?"

"It wasn't like that," Elsa said firmly. "He was just telling me I should talk to someone about this morning so I'm not all…like I was earlier permanently," she finished finally. Elsa thought she already felt a little better, but she still didn't feel much like talking, if she was honest with herself. Selfishly, she wanted to talk to Anna about the whole thing, not anyone else, but she was determined not to get those same awful images in her little sister's head if she didn't have to. Elsa yanked a blade of grass and just fiddled with it, not quite sure what to say.

"You can talk to me," Anna said matter-of-factly.

"Absolutely not. I made you stay out for a reason. So there." Elsa frowned and tossed her unsuccessful flower chain aside. The thing kept falling apart on her, and while she knew she could just use bits of ice or frost to hold it together, she wanted to make it stay together without her magic. Like Anna's.

Anna decided not to say anything more about it, and she went back to working on the flower crown she was making for Elsa. She tried it on her own head to make sure it was the right size before putting it on Elsa. "You look like a forest nymph or something. Or maybe an angel with a flower halo." Instead of smiling as Anna had hoped, Elsa's blue eyes clouded over and she turned away. "Elsa, what's wrong?"

"Those awful men didn't go to heaven, so…" Elsa's voice trailed off. "I basically sentenced them to eternal torture!"

"No you didn't, Elsa. They sentenced themselves by doing what they did. That's the same thing that would've happened when they died whether you executed them now or not," Anna pointed out. "Not your fault one bit."

"Maybe when you die that's it and there's nothing else," Elsa mumbled to herself, even though she knew for a fact that wasn't true.

"Good grief, Elsa, what a miserable thought that would be!" Anna exclaimed, hugging her older sister tightly. "I seem to remember you yourself saying last Christmas when you got so sick that you went somewhere you didn't hurt anymore. Even eighteen-year-old-you…would she have…attempted suicide if death was it and there was…nothing after?"

"Yes," Elsa said shortly, "because I wanted everything to stop hurting and to stop being such a burden, and nothing wouldn't hurt and nothing wouldn't be a burden, either." She hesitated before continuing shakily, "I d-don't even know what eighteen-year-old Elsa thought was going t-to happen to her."

Anna pulled away and just took Elsa by the hands. "You didn't believe you'd go to heaven?" she asked, immediately regretting that question. Elsa's blue eyes were bright with unshed tears; it was clear to Anna that this discussion was dredging up painful memories for the older girl. She looked very small and helpless all of a sudden, and it made Anna's heart ache. "It's all right, Elsa-you don't have to answer that," Anna said quickly.

But Elsa just shook her head and turned partway around, still clutching Anna's hands but refusing to meet her eyes. "How could I believe that? I didn't deserve it-I hurt you. And I had long since abandoned the notion that God could love someone l-like me. I believed He came and died for everyone so they could be saved, but I…I just didn't include stupid me," she whispered. "I guess I hoped that's where I would go, but I didn't really 'believe' it, because I thought Elsa was this awful person that didn't deserve any better but wanted something better all the same. I don't know. That girl was in a really, really bad place then and she couldn't function properly mentally or emotionally…at all. I'm not sure how to explain it. Like…I felt so terribly lonely that it hurt, but I was terrified of being anywhere near anyone. That doesn't make sense. I wanted hugs _so much,_ but I couldn't have any because I was dangerous. Things like that. I _still_ don't understand why horrible things happen if God loves us. He has a funny way of showing it, I think." Elsa managed to give Anna a lopsided smile and scooted closer. "I'm glad I have you for a sister. You listen to my cynical talk and I _know_ you love me just the way I am, even if I'm still a bit…messed up."

 _Oh Elsa…_ Anna was glad Elsa was willing to talk about this sort of thing now (she knew Elsa most certainly would not have not all that long ago), but it made her want to cry all the same.

"Anna?"

"What is it? It's all right to say whatever it is," Anna told her firmly.

"I…I suppose I just wanted to say I think I _know_ I did the right thing this morning, but I still feel horrible about it. Like it feels so wrong to be even a little bit relieved they're gone, that they can't hurt you or me or anyone else. Does that make sense?" Elsa didn't mention the sickening images still stuck in her head; she would talk to Kai about that later.

To Elsa's surprise, Anna immediately nodded. "That's just your sensitive heart, Elsa. I won't pretend to care those creeps are dead-maybe I'd think differently if I'd been the one to actually do it, but I just can't care. Not after what they tried to do to you. But I understand." She smiled when Elsa relaxed and seemed a bit happier. _We're all going to be fine._

* * *

"E…Elsa, can I talk to you?" Nikoleta asked a little while later. She had seemingly run up out of nowhere. "Gerda told me you were out here, that's how I found you."

Elsa looked up from where Anna was showing her how to make her flower chain stay together. "Of course. You didn't have to ask that," Elsa told her friend, patting the grass beside her.

Nikoleta's cheeks were pink, and she was half bouncing on her toes as she knelt beside Elsa, her smile wide. "I…you know how I wasn't here last night?"

"Yes, actually. I almost asked Eliot where you were, but I didn't think it was any of my business." Elsa suddenly realized she thought she knew exactly where her friend had been. Nikoleta's expression reminded her of how Anna sometimes looked after spending time with Kristoff.

"Well, I was with Espen, and we went and got a really late dinner and then we went walking down by the fjord for ages before coming back here. I…we…we came out here in the gardens and, well, he kissed me and stuff, Elsa!" Nikoleta was blushing fiercely, but she was clearly excited.

Elsa did not particularly want to talk about the 'and stuff'. Or kissing, for that matter. "You were out _all_ night?" she asked curiously.

"Not _all_ night, but really, really late. I'll finish my duties extra fast today since I slept way late by accident…Elsa, are you mad?" Nikoleta asked, sounding worried.

"No, but someone could have seen you and Espen out in the gardens doing who knows what in the middle of the night!" Elsa exclaimed. She hesitated before adding quietly, "Just…make sure he won't hurt you. I…it's none of my business, but I don't want you hurt." _Elsa, stop it. You sound paranoid. You know Espen won't hurt Nikoleta._ "I'm glad you're happy, though."

Nikoleta sat back on her heels, frowning. "Espen isn't like those nasty men that went after you," she said firmly, feeling quite certain that had something to do with Elsa's words. "But I'll be careful."

"Elsa, how come you're all right with Niko hanging out with her significant other at night and you won't let me do that?" Anna asked, only half-teasing. "She's younger than me, too!"

"It's none of my business what Niko is doing as long as I'm not knowingly letting her be in danger. You, on the other hand, are my little sister. That makes it my business."

"Does not!" Anna was indignant. That was not either Elsa's business. Not if she didn't think Nikoleta's love life was her business, too.

"I think Elsa's just being a big sister, Anna," Nikoleta pointed out. "And, she didn't say she was all right with what I was doing, either."

Anna was scowling now. "If I did what you did, I'd probably have a bed full of ice for a week and Kristoff's sled would mysteriously disappear or something!"

"Let's talk about something else," Elsa said abruptly.

* * *

Kristoff brought a picnic basket out to the sisters a little after lunchtime, Anikka and Olaf tagging along beside him. "Anikka keeps saying she wants to go swimming with you. I already told her you can't, Elsa, but she keeps asking anyway. Gerda made sandwiches and put some sliced watermelon in as a treat. I've never had it before, but it sure looks good. Gerda said we were supposed to let you have most of it."

Elsa's blue eyes immediately brightened. She loved watermelon, but it was a delicacy and she had only had it a few times in her life. "It tastes even better than it looks! And," she looked at Anikka, "maybe Anna or Kristoff will go in the pool with you, okay? You know I can't go swimming right now. I'd probably sink like a rock."

Olaf waddled over and carefully patted Elsa's foot. "Ice floats," he said matter-of-factly.

Anna grinned. "Olaf's right! Being in the water might even make your leg feel a little better, Elsa. You could just seal it with ice so you don't get the splints wet, like you did last summer when you broke your arm and we still went swimming in the fjord," she suggested. "Good grief, Elsa, you have gotten hurt about five hundred times since then, it seems like," Anna added with a frown. "And it's been barely a year!"

"Only four hundred and ninety-nine," Elsa quipped. Elsa's joking tone disappeared when she realized Anna wasn't joking…she was upset. She reached for Anna's hand and just gave her a gentle squeeze. "Anna, it's okay. _I'm_ okay. Obviously I hate being injured nearly every time something else crazy happens, but I have you. You always take care of me 'til I'm better, and then you keep doing so anyways," she said quietly.

Anna's frown didn't disappear. Even after Elsa's broken leg healed, she would still need her brace, at least for awhile longer…something that Anna still sort of blamed herself for, since Elsa had originally hurt her leg saving Anna. _But it doesn't bother Elsa anymore, I know it doesn't. She might feel self-conscious sometimes, but it doesn't scare her or make her upset. So there._

"Anna? Are you okay?" Elsa's voice was clearly concerned as she laid a cool hand on her little sister's arm.

Anna took one look at Elsa's concerned expression and just burst into tears. "How can you even _ask_ that, Elsa?! I should be asking _you_ that, not the other way around!" She felt Elsa trying to tug her closer, and Anna realized their positions were reversed from earlier. Now Elsa was trying to make her feel better rather than her trying to make Elsa feel better.

"I ask that because you are my little sister and I want to make sure you're all right," Elsa said firmly. Somehow trying to comfort Anna made Elsa herself feel better too. _See, Elsa, you can do good things. Just because you had to do something horrible earlier doesn't mean you're like those criminals,_ a little voice reminded her. _And…I think it's okay to feel disturbed about it, too, as long as I don't blame myself for the whole thing. That doesn't make me stupid or out of control or too merciful or too uncaring. It's actually okay._ "Anna, let's have our lunch Gerda fixed for us. That will make all of us feel better."

Anna smiled a bit when Elsa reached for a slice of watermelon and handed it to her. "And then we can go swimming, too."

"Okay."

 **A/N: I had a ton of trouble with this chapter, because I don't think executing people should be taken lightly, but it's also necessary sometimes, too. And I didn't want poor Elsa getting herself all upset all over again. I tried to make it clear the whole thing disturbs her to the core, but that she's fundamentally okay (ie., even though she got all weirded out right after she executed them, she was still able to think her thoughts at the very end of the chapter). Please let me know what you think.**

 **For whoever's reading Snowflake Sun, I'm sorry for the crazy long wait. I had so much trouble with this chapter that I didn't have time to finish the next chapter.:P**

 **Last chapter coming soon!**


	47. Chapter 47

**A/N: Thanks to everyone who's followed/favorited and/or is reading but not reviewing.:)**

 **TheWriterGirl14-Cool, I didn't know you had an account:) Yeah, Elsa will be okay, but she's still all shaken up about it.:/ As for Erik, he's nice and loyal to Elsa (and does like her, too), but I'm not pairing them together, either. He knows she's not interested and isn't going to push it. Eh, don't worry about Hans. He's just annoying Elsa at this point, lol. He will be returning to the Southern Isles with Kiara. I'm glad you liked the chapter!:)**

 **Elsa Tomago-Thank you for helping:) Yes, Elsa knows she did the right thing...she's just still upset about it.:/**

 **IndyGirl89-Elsa might be a bit shaken/upset about it for awhile, but she'll be fine.:) She does know she did the right thing; she just still feels bad about it.:/**

 **Sorry for the crazy long wait for this chapter!:/ On to the story!:)**

"Seriously, it's fine, Q-Elsa," Emily repeated for the fifth or sixth time that afternoon. "And are you sure you're ok with just being called 'Elsa'? I don't mind using your title, obviously."

Elsa was standing about fifteen or twenty feet away from the fire mage, Anna supporting her so she wouldn't risk falling. She folded her hands close against her chest and shook her head. "I am not doing this! One mistake and I could kill you. If _you_ make a mistake, you could incinerate Anna," she pointed out firmly, her mind flitting to what she'd had to do just that morning. She did _not_ want to even remotely risk hurting Emily or Anna, let alone kill either of them.

"Well, I trust you and myself not to," Emily said matter-of-factly. "Ready…"

Elsa screamed and instinctively threw one hand out when a large fireball came hurtling towards her and Anna, scrunching her eyes shut and twisting sideways sharply, attempting to shield Anna with her own body as she tried to shove the younger girl away, half-expecting the horrible pain of a burn to hit her all over. _Wait…I'm…okay?_ Breathing hard, she glanced at Anna with wide eyes. "Anna, you're okay?" she asked hopefully. There was an ice bubble around the two of them, and a wet splotch on the ground right outside of it where her ice blast had connected with Emily's fireball.

"Yeah, just…startled," Anna replied after a moment. She sent her best laser eyes at Emily. "That was really stupid, even by my risk-taking standards! What if Elsa's magic's defensive instincts hadn't made the ice bubble? She doesn't like fighting, Emily. Her immediate reaction was to get in front of me! What if her powers _hadn't_ reacted on instinct? She would have got nasty burns all over her! And…and you scared her!"

To her credit, Emily was apologetic. "I just wanted Elsa to see that she could magic-spar with me without hurting me, you, or herself. I didn't mean to scare you, Elsa, and I'm sorry," she said sincerely. "I won't do it again. Promise."

"It's fine, just…don't do that again," Elsa answered, forcing a smile. Even though she knew Emily hadn't meant any harm and that she and Anna were fine, her heart was still racing. And she guessed that her shaky hand must be chilly to touch since Anna yelped at the contact, even though she didn't pull away. "I don't think I want to do this right now, though. But I am not angry," Elsa assured Emily quickly. She had firmly decided right then and there that she was NOT going to do any 'magic-sparring' with Emily with anyone else present. Elsa was quite sure that the fire mage was probably near the same power level she was-or close to it anyways-and she did not want any sort of weird reaction from magical fire and ice interacting with one another to hurt Anna or anyone else. That was something neither she nor Emily could know or control. Besides, Elsa still felt shaken by the events of that morning, and she just didn't want to do anything remotely violent with her magic.

Anna was still rather mad, but since Elsa appeared fine, she decided not to make a fuss. "Maybe you guys could, you know, do something smaller? Like see if or how long it takes for magic fire to melt magic impenetrable ice. Or if Elsa's magic can neutralize the fireballs without leaving water droplets behind. Just do a little bit at a time and make it more experiment-y instead of like fighting or whatever," she suggested.

Emily opened her mouth to reply and caught Elsa's eyes briefly. _I don't understand why, but she doesn't want to do this right now. She's just being polite._ "Elsa, could you guys maybe, I don't know, show me around the castle grounds or something instead?" she asked lightly. "Maybe go in the pool I keep hearing about?"

"That sounds perfect," Elsa replied slightly too quickly. Even though she had already gone swimming with Anna earlier, that sounded like a _much_ better alternative to her.

* * *

An hour later, the three of them were flopped in the soft grass outside the pool after going swimming, Elsa purposely staying under a tree in the shade. "I am not getting any more sunburned today than I probably already did," Elsa said good-naturedly when Emily and Anna wanted her to join them lying directly in the afternoon sun. She knew she was probably already a little burnt (her arms looked pink), and she'd tried to be careful and stay in the shade. Elsa had already swiped her little sister's wide-brimmed hat, and she had wrapped herself up in an ice-towel, too. "Actually, Anna, you are going to get sunburned, too. Not as bad as I would, but you're still going to burn."

"I never burn in the sun," Emily said unhelpfully.

Anna scowled. She rather wished she had either chocolate-brown skin like Emily's or milky-white skin like Elsa's…neither of which was going to happen, obviously. "Gimme back my hat then, Elsa."

"No, I like it." Elsa closed her eyes and pretended to be napping.

Anna giggled and quietly scrambled over to Elsa so she could tickle her nose with the end of her braid. Then she started to tickle Elsa's neck instead when the older girl wrinkled her nose but pretended not to notice otherwise. This time Elsa's blue eyes shot open and she bolted upright, scooting backwards against the tree trunk, the hat they'd been teasing each other about left forgotten on the grass. "Elsa, what'd I do?!" Anna asked in surprise. "What did I do wrong?"

Elsa continued staring at something only she could see and then just scrunched her eyes shut in embarrassment a minute later, her hand still touching her neck, the other clutching a fistful of grass. _Good grief, Elsa, it was just Anna. You_ knew _that. Why did you react like that?_ "I'm sorry, Anna," she murmured finally.

"What did I do that startled you so much?" Anna asked, tentatively giving Elsa's tense hand a squeeze.

"You touched her neck," Emily said from her spot in the sun.

"I've tickled Elsa loads of times and it didn't scare her like that!" Anna protested. "Maybe she'd flinch or something if she wasn't expecting it at all, but that would have been, like, a year ago or something, when she just started learning how to control her magic." _Except…those stupid creeps tried to strangle her. It would make sense if touching her neck made her react like that._ "Oh," she muttered angrily, knowing that was exactly why Elsa had done that.

"Yeah. 'Oh'," Emily replied flatly.

"I am right here," Elsa said, not liking being discussed when she was right there. She grabbed Anna's hand and took a deep breath before putting her little sister's hand flat on her neck right where that man had choked her before. _See, it's just Anna. Not anyone trying to hurt me like that again. Just Anna. Just Anna. So there._

Anna made a face and tugged her hand away so she could just give Elsa a hug instead. "Elsa, you quit that. You're scaring yourself-you're freezing," she scolded.

"I was trying to…to…" Elsa searched for the right word, "desensitize myself so I wouldn't react like that again."

"That's a nice idea, but you don't do that in one sitting RIGHT AFTER the thing that bothers you happens," Emily said, still lying in the sun. Since she just didn't know Elsa all that well yet, she didn't want to intrude on the ice mage's personal space, especially seeing how Elsa had just reacted to Anna, of all people. "And you don't do it all at once, either. Also, Anna practically tackled you in the pool earlier and you gave her a piggyback ride. She was holding onto your neck then and you were fine. You just don't want to be touched there without expecting it, which is, you know, normal."

Elsa raised one eyebrow in a 'seriously, really?' expression. "Yes, everyone half-panics and thinks about someone choking them when their little sister tickles them," she deadpanned. "I don't think so." Elsa knew she hadn't _really_ panicked-she knew only too well what those attacks felt like, and what had just happened wasn't anywhere near as bad-but she couldn't think of another word to use, either. "Let's talk about something else."

"Ok." Without missing a beat, the fire mage asked, "Have you ever thought about trying to find more people with magic? Where all the fascination with elemental powers in fiction comes from?"

"Most of the stories I've read that have characters with magic in them are the villains. Especially if they are female," Elsa said quietly. "This is fun when you are six. Not so much when you are a pseudo-adult attempting to maintain your reputation and be taken seriously for your mind, not because people think you might turn them into ice statues. It's bad enough that I look like some little kid."

"I'd think you could use the ice statue thing to keep idiots in line, even if you had no intentions of being some evil tyrant," Emily pointed out. She didn't add that she thought Elsa could probably be rather slinky and use that to her advantage too if she wanted to. "You don't look like a little kid to me, either."

"Okay, if you didn't know I just turned twenty-two, how old would you guess I was?" Elsa asked.

Emily shrugged. "I don't know. It'd depend what I saw you doing. You have this weird way of looking way older and way younger at the same time. Who cares? You're nice and you evidently take great care of Arendelle. If you ever get a significant other, they will be very lucky. Not that it's weird if you don't," she finished quickly, "because it isn't."

Anna glanced from Emily to Elsa and back again. "Have you got somebody back home?" she asked abruptly.

"Yeah, why?"

"I thought you were hitting on her," Anna said, crossing her arms. "Elsa doesn't need _more_ people bugging her about that. I mean, at least you aren't a former creep like Hans, but still."

Emily laughed at that. "Nope, I do think you're cute, Elsa, but I'm not after you or anything," she answered, directing her reply at Elsa even though Anna had been the one who had brought it up originally.

Elsa turned red, still hating being referred to as 'cute' even though Emily was not Hans. Then again, maybe this 'cute' thing was something people said about people they thought were handsome or attractive or something. She _had_ heard Nikoleta call Espen 'cute', and Anna called Kristoff 'cute' sometimes, too. But she still thought it was stupid. A cat like Kolfinnia was cute. Little Anikka was cute. If people called _her_ cute, she felt like they were saying she looked like a child. This thing about calling people you found attractive cute made no sense to her. "Do…do either of you mind if your significant other calls you that?" she asked finally.

"What?"

"Cute."

Emily and Anna exchanged glances and just shrugged. "No. Why?"

"Nothing." Maybe she was just weird.

There was a short silence, and then Anna asked Emily about her 'special someone' back home. "We go to the movies pretty much every week, and we go out to dinner sometimes. My brother doesn't like it," Emily explained. "Not because I'm going out with someone, but because she's-" She cut herself off.

Anna poked Elsa's arm. "Sounds like Elsa when I go out with Kristoff," she said, giggling.

"I do not," Elsa responded indignantly.

"Liar! Your face gets all scrunched up and you act like he's never going to bring me back," Anna teased, making an exaggerated version of Elsa's disapproving expression.

 _That's because there's still a tiny part of me that's terrified of losing you entirely because of him, even though he's nice,_ Elsa thought, but she managed a smile and said nothing. She was grateful when Anna just squeezed her hand and dropped the topic.

* * *

That night, Anna trotted into Elsa's room, the old diary Elsa had given her clutched in her hand. "Hey, Elsa, can I read…what are you thinking so hard about?"

Elsa was sitting in the window seat gazing outside at the summer night, a gentle snowfall cooling the air in her room. She didn't seem upset, so Anna knew the snow wasn't because Elsa's emotions were getting the best of her again; she was making it snow on purpose. "I was thinking it would be nice if Emily's special someone could go to that stupid party with her tomorrow, and Salma and Ahmed and Katie, too…" She paused. "It'd be weird to have Linnae go get all of them, wouldn't it?"

Anna smiled and pulled a chair up near her sister. "I think it would be all right as long as you don't expect them all to automatically be able to come since it's such short notice." She hesitated before continuing, "Elsa, you _do_ realize Emily's 'special someone' is a girl, right?"

"Sure, so?"

"So not everyone is going to be all right with that. Didn't you catch what she started to say about her own brother earlier? That sort of 'tude would probably be worse here," Anna said carefully.

Elsa was still staring at her blankly, not understanding what the problem was. "Why is this a problem? I remember when I was still rather little, maybe twelve, if that, I asked Gerda about these sorts of things. She told me it was all normal and you were born that way, that you didn't choose who you liked or didn't like. Then she told me that people use the Bible to be cruel to others sometimes, but that she didn't think that was right and she didn't believe God would approve of such behavior, and that I shouldn't act like that when I was a grown-up." She looked down at her hands and finished in a whisper, "I asked if it was like me being born with my powers. She said yes. I never, ever questioned it again, because I would not treat someone else badly for something they couldn't change."

Anna could see tears glistening in Elsa's eyes, and one trickled down her cheek before Anna could wipe them away or give her a hug. She could picture little twelve-year-old Elsa curiously asking Gerda questions even though she was frightened, and it made Anna herself upset. "Elsa, I don't care if Emily has a girlfriend either, but I just thought you might not have realized that you could be putting Emily in an awkward situation without meaning to."

"I'm the queen, and I say it's none of anyone's business!"

"You can keep people from outright bullying her, but you can't keep them from gossiping or avoiding her," Anna said flatly.

"Maybe they just need to talk about it! Emily is no different from anyone else. And you _know_ there are people just like her right here in Arendelle, too. Don't tell me there aren't!" Elsa was angry now. "Why is this even a discussion? We may as well be saying nobody with brown eyes or red hair can come or something. That's how asinine it is!"

"Hey, I have red hair! Well, sort of."

"Exactly my point." Elsa crossed her arms and stared Anna right in the face. "I will tell Emily that she may run into more prejudice here than she does where she's been living, and I'll ask her if she'd still like her significant other to come anyways. Then I will make sure to tell her I won't put up with any nonsense if someone makes a stink, too. But I'm not going to not invite someone because people are prejudiced." She briefly paused before adding, "Besides, people will probably just assume they're friends anyway, I'll bet."

"On another topic…" Anna remembered why she had come to Elsa's room in the first place. She held out Elsa's old diary and flipped near the back to a page with ' _The Littlest Elemental'_ written at the top in a younger Elsa's neat handwriting. "I know I promised I wouldn't read this, and I swear I haven't, but…may I? Please? That sounds like the title to a really, really good story!"

Elsa took the diary and just sighed as she stared down at the page. She clearly remembered writing that story, and she still didn't really want Anna or anyone else to read it. _What are you so afraid of, Elsa? Anna won't think you were stupid or anything. She might even, heaven forbid, think it's a good story._ "I…Anna, it's not what you think. It's not a fairy tale. Not like you're thinking," she said quietly. Elsa was tempted to just rip those pages out of her old diary and just toss them out, but a bit of her knew it was just a part of her past and throwing away tangible evidence wouldn't erase it. Little twelve-year-old Elsa had been rather proud of that awful story, if she could call the emotion she had felt then that. And it had let her get a bit of her out-of-control emotions out on paper, too.

"I'd still like to read it, even if just out of pure curiosity, Elsa," Anna told her. "I won't keep bugging you about it, but I would like to read it."

"Okay," Elsa said abruptly, handing the diary back to Anna and wrapping her arms around her middle. "But you…you have t-to read it here," she said softly.

 _She's scared of my reaction but wants to know what it is,_ Anna thought. "Can I read it out loud?"

"No!"

* * *

A LITTLE WHILE LATER…

"What on earth, Elsa?! You practically killed off the best character, and you _did_ kill off my second-favorite!" Anna exploded the second she was done. "And you let the worst one have the happiest ending! What'd you let Solfrid live for?! You should've killed her off instead of leaving poor Liv in a condition where she couldn't even communicate and killing off Embla entirely. Although at least I suppose you let Embla be happy after she died, since you turned her into the tree of her namesake and it seems like she's sort of like Liv's…guardian angel, kind of…?" Anna saw a flash of pain across Elsa's face, and she glanced from the diary to Elsa and back again in horror. _Wait a second…_ "Am I…Embla?" she asked hesitantly.

Elsa buried her face in her hands and burst into tears. "I…I sh-shouldn't have l-let you read that stupid thing," she mumbled. She felt Anna tugging at her arm, but she tensed up and jerked herself away. _Elsa, get it together. The stupid story is a decade old. It doesn't matter. Just stop it._

Anna finally just picked Elsa up and held her close. She didn't even try to say anything; she just hugged the older girl and let her cry. Anna knew Elsa knew she was perfectly safe-she was just hurting, and didn't like her deepest thoughts and imagination being exposed.

 _It's okay. At least now I don't have to worry about Anna reading it and not telling me she did. It's just a silly story a depressed little girl wrote, that's all._ Elsa found herself tucked under the covers in bed when she opened her eyes. Anna was sitting right beside her, holding one hand tightly. Elsa relaxed. Anna was not looking at her with that awful expression of pity; she just looked concerned, like she wanted to make sure Elsa was okay.

"Why did you choose to end the story that way, Elsa?" Anna asked simply, hoping talking about it might help (and ok, satisfy her own questions, too). But mostly help. "You could have at least killed Liv and turned her into a stream flowing beside Embla's tree or something. Made it so they knew the other was all right. Well, their souls or whatever, anyways, since they'd still be, you know, dead."

Elsa gave Anna a sad smile. "I think you already know why the story ended like that," she said quietly. "If Embla, the earth elemental, was sort of you, and water elemental Liv was responsible in a roundabout sort of way for her 'death'…" Elsa's voice trailed off.

Anna said nothing, forcing the older girl to continue.

"Liv was me," Elsa admitted after an awkward moment of silence. "Not completely, but…"

"You took _everything_ away from her. Her job as an elemental, her best friend, most of her abilities…she can't even move by herself at the end, and she can't think right, either. There's not even anyone to take care of her. You leave it in such a way that it sounds like she's going to die all alone eventually, never finding out that the tree she's left under every day is her friend. Elsa, you…you just…" Anna was struggling not to cry, and she wished she could go back in time and give the sad little girl that had written this a hug whether she would accept one or not. "And then you give that mean Solfrid a happy ending, since she always hated Liv anyway. Why doesn't the air elemental ever do anything to help? You didn't even name her. She just floats around and watches stuff happen."

Elsa's expression tensed. "Mama never did anything t-to help," she mumbled, closing her eyes again as tears threatened to fall. "The air elemental was Mama."

The 'oh, _crap_ ' moment hit Anna like a ton of bricks. _That means Solfrid represented Dad to her. Oh, Elsa…_ "I think you should give all these characters a new ending," Anna said finally. "Least of all poor Liv. If you really want your fairy tale to have a tragic ending, at least do the kind with a trace of hope or something. Or make it bittersweet. Like maybe the air elemental comes to Liv at the end here and tells her her name and says she can't heal Liv's broken body and mind in the physical realm, but she can transform her into a stream beside Embla's tree so they can communicate and be happy again. Then you could either end it there or have Solfrid regretting what she's done and apologizing to Embla's tree and Liv's stream or something. There, ta-da, much better ending. How's that?" Anna paused before continuing, "You know, Elsa, the story itself, just as a story on its own, is really good. It just needs a less horribly depressing ending, that's all. But it's really good."

"I think…I think I actually like that." Elsa sat up and just hugged Anna as tightly as she could. She could feel tears running down her cheeks again, but this time she felt at peace. That old story didn't hurt anymore, and she was no longer embarrassed by it. Anna was right. By itself, without the associations it went with for her, the story was nothing to be ashamed of. She should give her childhood characters better endings. "I should rewrite that ending with yours. Liv's name is literally life. She deserves a better ending than that load of horribleness twelve-year-old me gave her. I thought I was being so ironic giving her that ending considering her name's meaning."

Anna laughed. "I'll bet! I'm glad you let me read your story, Elsa. It means a lot to me that you were willing to trust me enough to do that."

"Me, too. About letting you read it. I'm glad I let you read it. I…I hadn't thought about that stupid thing in ages, but it feels so nice to have some closure for it all the same, if that makes sense?" Elsa hesitated before continuing, "I mean, it…I don't know. It's like you helped fix a bit of me I had forgotten was broken."

"Stinker! You are _not_ broken!"

"Twelve-year-old me definitely was."

"She was just hurting, Elsa. Give yourself a break. Writing a depressing story wasn't wrong, even if I hate thinking about little-you punishing the character she considered her alter ego like that." Anna paused before continuing, "And I'm sorry little-me was so mean to you sometimes. I…if I _had_ been allowed to see you when we were nine and twelve, I might have still fussed at you for 'ignoring' me, but I know I would have understood and tried to help, even at nine. I just wanted you back."

Elsa's shoulders tensed again, and she pulled the covers over her face so Anna could not see her. "You wouldn't have wanted m-me back then," she whispered. "At one point I…I got so bad I wouldn't…couldn't…even talk to Gerda. If you'd seen me, you'd have just been angry and left me all a-alone again since you would have assumed I was ignoring you."

Anna was quiet for a moment, unsure what to say to that. "What do you mean you couldn't talk to Gerda?" she asked finally, yanking the comforter away from Elsa's face so she could see her again. "And I would _not_ have left you all alone again. Little kid me probably would have fussed at you for awhile and then realized you were hurting and just wanted to give you hugs. But I wouldn't have abandoned you!"

Elsa gave Anna a lopsided smile. "I wish you _had_ gotten into my room somehow and fussed at me and tried to fix me then. Gerda tried so hard to help, but I…I think I needed you."

"No, you needed Mom and Dad to treat you properly," Anna said huffily, "and I still want to know what you meant when you said you couldn't talk to Gerda."

Elsa sighed. "You know how we were trying to talk to each other underwater in the pool earlier and it's impossible? Like that, except picture being able to hear someone talking to you and being half zoned out even when you genuinely want to answer. Locked inside in another way." She shuddered, her blue eyes vacant. "I don't know what was wrong with me, really. I wasn't eating, and I never knew one girl had so many tears inside her. Gerda told me later that that was the only time I ever actually scared her. She was worried I had totally lost it and I remember she fussed at Papa to make Dr. Raske check me."

"What did Dad say?"

"That I was being stubborn," Elsa answered softly. "I didn't know it then, but the _only_ reason I 'snapped out of it' was because Gerda loving and taking care of me made my magic 'calm down', if you could even call it that. If…if I hadn't had her, I don't know what would have happened."

Anna scowled and squeezed Elsa's hand hard. "You wrote that story after all that, didn't you? That…feeling of being locked in…I knew you wrote Liv's thoughts of what happened to her a little too well for a twelve-year-old! You used YOUR thoughts to write hers."

Elsa shrugged but didn't reply verbally. There was nothing to say, really. In any event it did not matter to her any longer. Anna was right there, and she could control her magic now. "Anna, I…I know it's selfish, but I almost wish Papa wouldn't come tomorrow. What if I do or say something wrong again?" She sat up and just stared down at her snowflake floating above her palm. "I don't want a repeat of last year. Especially in front of Papa."

"Come on, sis, you _know_ that's not going to happen," Anna pointed out. "And he might just dance with Mom most of the time. He never would admit it, but I know Dad likes to dance."

"I _think_ it's not going to happen. I _hope_ it's not going to happen. But I don't _know_ it." Elsa was still staring intently at the little sparkling snowflake, as if that might confirm to her that she would not panic and lose control again like the year before. "I can confidently say I won't freeze everything again, but I can see myself panicking and leaving ice patches behind or having to leave the party because my magic wants out or something else like that," she admitted reluctantly.

Anna plopped her hand over Elsa's, the one making the snowflake, without warning, making her yelp.

"I could have hurt your hand just now, Anna! Don't _do_ that!" Elsa sounded horrified.

"You stinker, look at what your magic just did!" Anna said, poking her sister's arm. Elsa's magic had automatically morphed the signature snowflake into harmless frost and sparks of pure magic on her hand and wrist, not channeling even a tiny bit of it into Anna's not-immune-to-magic skin.

Elsa just stared down at her hand incredulously, not quite believing what she was seeing. _Anna touched me right when I was channeling magic, and it didn't hurt her. I didn't even consciously do that…_ "I…"

"Elsa, your magic wants to help. It _wants_ to do what you want it to. I think it's more in tune with 'just plain Elsa' now, because you like it better now and so it likes you better in return. It 'knows' you want to protect me and everyone else." Anna paused before continuing, "If you _do_ make a mistake at the party tomorrow, it's not going to hurt anyone."

Elsa's shoulders hunched to her ears and she didn't meet Anna's eyes. "It's still embarrassing. I think everyone knows my powers are linked to my emotions. What are they going to think if I have a little anxiety flurry following me around or I leave ice on the floor?" Her voice was so quiet Anna struggled to hear her. _I sound ridiculous. I should just shut up._

"You know you're not going to have snowflakes floating around you the whole time, you goof. Although I have a solution for that if you're worried about it. It's summer. It's hot. Make it gently snowing in the whole ballroom from the get-go, and put some ice decorations on the tablecloths and stuff. Then nobody would notice should you get anxious enough that you have snowflakes floating around you." Anna was glad that Elsa seemed to perk up at that idea. "And, you're the queen, yes, but you're human. Humans make mistakes. Nobody will laugh at you or think you're stupid if you make a little mistake."

"And I don't like big parties like this anyways. What if I say something wrong or freeze up in the middle of a conversation? What if I feel like I'm going to have one of those panic attacks and I can't get out of the room in time?" _Elsa, stop it. Stop, stop, stop._

Anna wasn't sure what to say to that, since she knew that was a very real possibility for Elsa. Elsa was fine talking to friends or family, and she was all right in public too, really, but Anna knew that extended periods of socializing was exhausting for Elsa and made her nervous to boot. If Anna was honest with herself, she was quite sure Elsa probably _would_ freeze up and not know what to say at least once at the party, although she didn't think Elsa would panic, either. "I think that if that happens you should just laugh it off and not worry about saying something silly or freezing up," she said finally. "Nobody says the right stuff ALL the time. You don't have to be perfect."

"The queen is supposed to appear perfect in public," Elsa said stiffly. "And I hate making mistakes in public, verbally or otherwise. I feel like everyone's staring at me and inwardly laughing or something. Like 'Oh, look at the weird magic girl that can't even hold a conversation properly!'" She scowled when Anna just barely stifled a giggle. "See, even you're laughing!"

"Not _at_ you," Anna said quickly. "You just deadpanned that. It was funny. And untrue. You're not a 'weird magic girl that can't even hold a conversation properly', but never mind that. Elsa, you're freaking yourself out for no reason and making it worse by overthinking everything and assuming everything will go wrong."

"That's easy for you to say! You like big social events like parties. I don't. And people just automatically like you. You're like a…a people magnet."

"They like you, too," Anna said firmly. "You need to stop assuming other people think of you the way you think of yourself, because it's just not true. Look, think about it this way. If you were a random guest at the birthday party tomorrow and Queen Elsa made a little mistake-say she stutters when she replies to you and then leaves a bit of ice on the floor but is friendly otherwise-what would you think?"

"That she was scared for some unexplainable reason." Elsa was still tense, and she kept her arms wrapped around her middle even though she managed to hold Anna's gaze.

"Well yeah, but you wouldn't think she's incompetent or laugh at her. You'd be like, 'Oh, the queen's human, she made a mistake, big deal'. Everyone already knows you have magic, Elsa, and they like you fine. If you don't make a big deal out of it, neither will anyone else. And really, I don't think you'll panic. You've gotten way, way better about that," Anna assured her. "If you feel overwhelmed, I think you know to just retreat off by yourself for a few minutes, and that's fine."

Elsa fiddled with the end of her braid uncomfortably. _I do know to do that, but I don't want to have to._ "I just want to be okay with the whole thing like you. I don't like having to do special things to simply cope with something everyone else finds fun. It makes me feel like a…a namby-pamby weakling or something. Does…does that make sense?"

Anna was quiet after that, not quite sure what a good response would be. "I think if you asked Kristoff what he thought of big social events he wouldn't sound much different from you. Do you think he's a 'namby-pamby weakling'?"

"Of course not. But he isn't _scared_ of them! He just doesn't like them." Elsa was still twisting her braid around her finger, her eyes not quite meeting Anna's.

"I think you'd be surprised, Elsa. Tomorrow you ask him why he started talking for Sven when he was a kid. I'll tell him you're going to so's he won't think the question's out of nowhere. Here, let's try something. First you lay down," Anna said, pushing the older girl back against the pillows. " 'Kay, now close your eyes and put your hand on your tummy and think about breathing really deep and slow. Now think about you being confident and happy at your party. Not necessarily talking to people, maybe eating chocolate-covered fruit or krumkaker or something."

Elsa's expression scrunched up for a moment, but then she relaxed.

"Okay, somebody you don't know just walked up to you and wished you a happy birthday. What are you going to say?"

"I turn red because I have a mouthful of chocolate and I'm _desperately_ hoping you'll pop up and save me!" Even now, Elsa's pale cheeks were tinged pink, although she decided to go along with Anna's scenario a bit longer.

"Nope," Anna said, popping the 'p', "I'm dancing. _You_ have to do or say something, and blushing doesn't count. Elsa, think about it. Eating is normal at a party. What would be a reasonable reaction?"

"Maybe…nod politely and try to hurry up and swallow so I can say thank you?"

Anna gave Elsa's hand a squeeze. "Sure. Then you could also offer the person one of the chocolates or say you like something they are wearing or something. Here's a harder one. Say one of those stereotypical fussy older ladies asks if your leg is ok and what happened. What are you going to say about that?"

Elsa blinked up at Anna and made a face. "My first thought would be why would anyone ask if a _broken_ leg was _okay_. That, by definition, means it's not okay," she pointed out, much to Anna's frustration.

"Oh pooh. You know what I meant. Close your eyes again!"

Elsa complied, but she said nothing for awhile. "I suppose I'd just say it was fine. I have no idea what I'd say if someone asked what happened, though. I can't very well explain about that awful mirror test thing." _Good grief, it's a good thing Anna is trying to help me with this now, or I'd be in big trouble tomorrow._ "I can't just say it was an accident, either. I said that when I had to start wearing that brace and people asked what happened…"

"Then say you don't wish to discuss it and change the subject. Let's come up with some good discussion topics for you, too. And some jokes, so's you can just say one of those if you don't know what to talk about," Anna told her.

"I don't think I'm a comedienne…I don't want to stand up and tell jokes," Elsa said firmly, shaking her head hard.

"Tell me a joke, then. You deadpan things all the time. You should be great at telling jokes."

"Well…" Elsa smiled as a silly riddle popped into her head. "Did you hear about the girl whose temperature is absolute zero?"

Anna raised her eyebrows in surprise. _Wha…?_ "No…"

"She's 0K." Elsa delivered her reply, hoping Anna would at least get it, but she just looked confused. "You know…the Kelvin scale? Zero Kelvin is absolute zero, so 0K…like okay…never mind, it's not funny. I don't want to crack jokes about cold temperatures anyways."

"Try a different one, Elsa! That can't be the only joke you know," Anna said encouragingly, although somehow she was quite sure whatever Elsa was going to say was probably not going to be all that funny.

"I read this one awhile ago…Two atoms are walking down a street. One atom says to the other, 'I think I lost an electron!' The other says, 'Are you sure?' 'Yes, I'm positive!'" Elsa yelped when Anna suddenly threw a pillow at her. "Not funny?"

"That was terrible! You got that from one of those books you've been reading-I know so 'cause you told me about atoms and whatnot!" Anna actually thought it was pretty funny, although she didn't think anyone else would, most likely, if anything simply because they wouldn't get it.

"And entropy isn't what it used to be. What's the integral of (1/cabin)d(cabin)?" Elsa honestly had no intentions whatsoever of telling any of her jokes at her birthday party, but she thought telling them to Anna was great fun. She was giggling herself now. "A natural log cabin!"

" _No calculus jokes!_ " Anna squealed, smacking Elsa with a pillow again. "Those don't count!" She squealed again when Elsa dropped a bit of snow down her back. What she really wanted to do was tickle Elsa until she begged for mercy, but after Elsa's reaction to that earlier, Anna was not going to do that to her again. So she attacked the older girl with pillows instead.

"It's not like you have any better ones! Quit it with the pillows!" Elsa let out a pained yelp when she tumbled right off the bed, but she was still laughing. She froze when she heard a scolding voice from the doorway. _Why am I worried? Anna and I were just teasing each other. That's fine. So there._

"Anna, what on earth are you thinking?!" Uncle Thomas's worried but not angry voice said. "And you were fussing at me for letting Elsa work on paperwork before." He shook his head as he watched Anna help her injured sibling back into bed. "I could hear you two all the way down the hall. I'm happy to see both of you happy, but please be a bit more careful. I won't bother asking what was so uproariously funny." _They're still practically children. Those two should have the chance to act ridiculous as long as it doesn't harm anything._

Elsa's leg still hurt from her tumble off the bed, but she was smiling. "Anna was trying to help me be…not awkward for the party tomorrow, and somehow that segued into me telling Anna silly jokes, that's all," she explained.

"Nerdy jokes," Anna corrected. "She told me the absolute _worst_ calculus joke!"

Thomas chuckled. "Well, that's fine, but still…be a bit more careful. Elsa, if that leg doesn't heal right, it's going to be painful to walk, magic or not," he told her seriously. "I won't fuss at you about it, but you need to take it easy and be more careful. Do something else to tease each other besides beating each other up with pillows and the like, all right?"

Elsa was very glad it was just Uncle Thomas and not her mother that had come to see what was going on, because Uncle Thomas was logically concerned and just wanted her to stop doing things that risked hurting herself further without making a huge fuss about it. "Okay. I…thank you. For caring and not…making an issue out of it," she said awkwardly.

 _That's what I was supposed to do, Elsa,_ Thomas thought, but he didn't tell Elsa this. "You just take care of yourself. Anna, you make sure she does, because she'll do most anything if she thinks you want her to."

Anna put her arm around Elsa and just hugged her tightly. "I will. I promise."

* * *

Elsa woke up in the wee hours of the morning trembling, feeling sweaty all over despite the chill in the air. _Get it together, Elsa. You're fine. And you aren't a monster for executing those criminals, either._ She wished the image of the one man's terrified expression right before she had taken his life would go away. This time the dream hadn't been Anna or her being hurt…it was re-watching that same moment of executing them over and over and Anna watching her do it. Elsa buried her face in the pillows and just clutched the two dolls Anna had given her the year before. "It's over, it's over. Over, over, over," she muttered to herself.

Anna didn't wake up completely, but even in her half-asleep state, she recognized that Elsa was upset, and she hugged her close. "Elsa…it…ok. Safe," Anna mumbled sleepily.

Elsa jumped when Anna snored right near her ear, but somehow the ordinarily irritating noise helped ground her and calm her down, and she drifted back to sleep. She slept peacefully the rest of the night.

* * *

True to her word, Anna took Elsa out to the stables in the morning. "You wait out here for a minute, Elsa. I'm just going to tell Kristoff what you're going to do, 'kay?"

"Anna, it's okay. I don't want to bother him. Maybe he doesn't want to…" Elsa trailed off, realizing Anna had already run off, "talk about it," she finished to herself. _This is ridiculous. I should not be making Anna bother_ her _fiancée to talk to me just because he might be helpful. That's rude and mean._

"You can help brush Sven while you guys talk," Anna said cheerfully a minute later, nudging Elsa into the stables. "Kristoff, you take extra good care of her for me!" She darted off toward the castle, leaving Elsa and Kristoff staring awkwardly at each other.

"I'm sorry, Kristoff, I should just go," Elsa said after a few seconds of silence aside from Sven chomping on a carrot. "I-"

"No, it's all right, really. I just…wasn't expecting Anna to run in here and basically say I'm supposed to be giving the queen emotional therapy this morning so she doesn't ice everyone out at her own birthday party. Here. If you want." Kristoff handed Elsa a brush so she could help brush Sven's fur.

Elsa hesitated at first, slightly worried the big reindeer might kick her by accident or something. _Please don't step on me,_ she begged mentally, but Sven just snuffled at her dress and stood still otherwise.

"He won't push you or anything, Elsa. He knows you're injured," Kristoff told her. "You be nice to her and show her why talking works, Sven," he told the reindeer, patting him on the head. "Seriously, Elsa, just try it. Tell him something you won't even tell Anna. Tell him anything. Sven won't mind, and he won't blab to anyone, either, will you, buddy?"

Sven shook his head. "No, won't even tell smelly old Kristoff," Kristoff said in the deeper voice he used as 'Sven'.

Elsa actually stifled a giggle. She still thought talking for a reindeer was kind of weird and silly, but there was no denying it was funny, and besides, Sven did quite honestly look like he was listening.

"I'll go and get some water so I can give Sven a bath. Then you can talk in peace without me overhearing you. I'll knock loudly before coming back in. You don't even have to talk for Sven if you don't want to." Kristoff still felt odd trying to help Elsa, but it was nice that Anna would trust him to try to help her. And it was nice that Elsa hadn't fled at the suggestion that she talk to Sven, too. She _had_ started laughing, but she hadn't been laughing _at_ him, either.

"Okay." Elsa waited until she was sure Kristoff was gone before saying anything to the friendly reindeer. "I…I don't know what I'm doing, and I feel ridiculous," she whispered, hesitantly petting Sven's soft fur rather than brushing him, since she figured Kristoff would end up doing that all over again after Sven's bath.

Sven looked slightly insulted, but he just nuzzled Elsa's hand. He didn't know Elsa all that well, but he could tell the girl was nervous and just needed a good listener. Besides, she was hurt. Hurt people needed to be taken care of.

Elsa yelped when Sven began nudging her toward the soft piles of clean straw on one side of the stall, but somehow she wasn't scared. Sven didn't look like he was going crazy, and wasn't shoving her. He did, however, push her into the straw and then began snuffling at her broken leg. "Don't, don't do that!" She was surprised when Sven actually _listened_ and lay down beside her, his head half on her lap. Elsa smiled a bit and hesitantly laid her hand on the reindeer's head. _Does Sven actually understand me?_ she found herself thinking. _Oh, come on, Elsa, that's impossible. He's a reindeer. But…_ "I…I still feel silly, but…this is nice. Anna and Kristoff seem to think talking might help."

Sven just blinked at her.

 _Why not? Sven won't laugh at me if I say something stupid, after all._ "I'm scared I might…mess up at the…party this evening," she mumbled almost inaudibly. "I know it's illogical, but…and I don't…want to go. I wish I hadn't planned it. Even if Anna and most everyone else will probably enjoy it. I'm tempted to…conveniently get sick so I don't have to go. Or claim my leg hurts too much, so I can't go." Elsa sighed as she glanced at her leg, which really was still sore, but not nearly enough that it would make her stay in bed or anything. Mostly she was just tired of it already. "Kristoff said I should talk about something I wouldn't even tell Anna about…"

The reindeer looked at her expectantly, but he didn't snort or get up or anything else.

Elsa scrunched her eyes shut and tried to concentrate on the texture of Sven's soft fur under her sensitive fingers. "I…I still feel horrible from those awful men attacking me like that…almost worse because I k-killed them," she muttered.

 _Executed them, not just 'killed them',_ a little voice reminded her. Sven lifted his head and gently nudged Elsa's neck. Elsa instinctively flinched before wrapping her arms around Sven and burying her face in his furry neck. Although she could feel tears trickling down her cheeks, she didn't feel particularly bad right that second. Sven smelled funny, but he was solid and furry and he was not going to judge her or hurt her for what had happened.

"Anna told me it wasn't my fault, and I do believe her, but it still made me feel like it was all the same. They said as much, too." Elsa remembered her guards' reactions to the criminals' words, and suddenly she didn't feel so weird about it anymore. Her guards were men, and they did not think like that. Erik was older than she was, but some of the others were about her age, or at least close to it. If anyone thought the incident was her fault, it should be them. But they _never_ treated her like that, and she couldn't remember any of them ever eyeing her weirdly, either, whether they were anywhere near her age or not. Well, she could remember a couple of them looking at her, but not creepily. And Kristoff never did that. He would gawk at Anna sometimes, but he didn't even look at Anna all creepy like that, and they were _engaged_.

Elsa decided that the creepy people were the weird ones, not her.

"'S ok to come in?" she heard Kristoff call as he knocked loudly.

"Yes!" Elsa called back.

Kristoff grinned when he saw Elsa sitting in the straw with Sven beside her. She looked rather out of place in her ice-dress, trying to sit up straight and look more 'queenly', but she was smiling now and despite the funny sitting-up-straight thing, she looked mostly relaxed, too. "I told you Sven makes a good listener."

"Anna said I should…ask you why you started talking _for_ him?" Elsa's quiet voice was curious but hesitant, as if she were unsure she should ask that question.

Kristoff hesitated. He actually didn't mind if Elsa knew; it wasn't like she was a blabbermouth by any stretch of the imagination, but he also knew Elsa was still very perturbed with the trolls. Telling Elsa that Bulda had told him to have conversations with Sven when he was a scared child to help him converse with others better probably would not go over well. Elsa might even get mad for all he knew. "I didn't talk much as a kid. Being ignored and the like. Sven helped," he said carefully.

Elsa struggled to her feet…well foot, at the moment, her blue eyes slightly suspicious. "You're leaving something out. Did those trolls tell eight-year-old you to do it?" Elsa's voice had a slight edge to it now. She sounded disgusted.

 _Should've known she would guess…_ "Elsa, it was Bulda's idea, not Grand Pabbie's. Bulda's the one that tried to take care of you right after the stupid mirror test, remember? She didn't support what Pabbie did." Kristoff hated to badmouth the old troll, but he had gone over and over it in his head, and the fact was that he had caused Elsa nothing but trouble. He wanted to be angry at her for holding a bit of a grudge, but he just couldn't. Trying to set off that explosive had been wrong, if well-intentioned, and forcing someone to undergo that mirror test by telling them a lie was wrong, too. Kristoff almost felt like the incident was partly his fault, considering Anna had trusted him to protect her sister, and he had failed. "I'm sorry for…what happened with the trolls," he said awkwardly. "Anna trusted me to protect you, and I failed."

"Don't be sorry, Kristoff. It was not your fault," Elsa said firmly. She shook her head ruefully as she continued, "You'd think I'd be able to protect myself. But no, _myself_ is what broke my leg. Evil-me." Elsa sighed and added, "Never mind that. I'm sorry for snapping at you. You can tell Bulda I am grateful to her next time you see her. _Only_ Bulda. I have no wish to converse with Grand Pabbie or any of the others again." _Ever. I am not going back to the Valley of the Living Rock for advice anymore. I just…can't._

Kristoff wasn't sure what to say to that. "Elsa, I…I don't know how to put this. I don't think what Grand Pabbie did was right, but…just…I don't know. You don't want to get on his bad side, and he's not all bad. That's just all you've seen. And, like…the trolls don't understand humans, really. Like they honestly think getting injured during a magic test is normal. They used to try to get me to burrow tunnels with the kid trolls when I was younger. They really don't understand…"

Elsa's blue eyes flashed dangerously. "If Pabbie ever, _ever_ tries to hurt _anyone_ in my country, _especially_ Anna, he will have to deal with me personally. And he told me something he shouldn't have," she said darkly, holding her head high. "I am not scared of him. I'm scared of a lot of other things, but that old troll isn't one of them."

"What did he tell you?" Kristoff was unnerved by the abrupt change in the young queen's demeanor, although he thought he saw hurt tears gathering in her eyes even through the anger. He did not address this.

"Assuming he was telling the truth about the flood wiping out all but two of the rock trolls, I know how trolls die," Elsa said softly, "and, if he hurt or killed Anna somehow, well…" she let her words trail off, letting her meaning known only too easily. She forced a smile when she saw Anna standing in the doorway. _How much of that did Anna just hear?_

Anna had indeed overheard what Elsa had said about Grand Pabbie, and the idea that her sweet older sister had a plan to kill the old troll if he ever hurt someone she loved scared her. This was the same girl that had been so distraught over executing those criminals that had outright tried to molest and kill her. "Elsa, promise me you won't hurt Grand Pabbie if he ever hurt or killed me for whatever reason," she begged, putting her hands on Elsa's shoulders.

"No. I promise if _anyone_ ever kills you and I cannot stop it, that person is a dead man…or creature, as the case may be." Elsa's voice was too calm for that statement, although her mind and heart was anything but. _And then I'd make sure Arendelle was safe before getting rid of me, too,_ she added mentally. She glanced at Kristoff, her gaze unwavering. "And if you think _I_ will ever do the unimaginable-like if I were poisoned somehow like before-promise me you won't hesitate. Kill me."

Kristoff blanched. "I'll do nothing of the sort. In that situation, I might knock you out or shoot to incapacitate, but I'm not going to kill you, Elsa. That's not the same thing as killing a murderer and you know it. And Grand Pabbie would never kill Anna."

Anna frowned as she glanced from Kristoff to Elsa and back again. "Kristoff, you were supposed to help Elsa be ok with needing to have 'coping skill' thingies, not get her all mad at the trolls again," she scolded. "Although I guess it's my fault since I knew talking for Sven was originally Bulda's idea, and…ugh." She threw her hands up in frustration and then just hugged both Kristoff and Elsa as tightly as she could. "Never mind that. Let's just get ready for the party. There's still all kinds of last-minute stuff to do. Elsa, you can just rest and take a break. It's YOUR birthday party, after all."

"Anna, there isn't anything else to do. You set everything up for me already." Elsa sighed. "I think I will go work on some paperwork for a few hours." _I want as much quiet time as I can get before having to spend hours at that party this evening._

"That's not resting!" Anna protested. "Or taking a break!"

Elsa shrugged and gave her a lopsided smile. "It's more restful for me than going to a party," she said truthfully. "Not to mention it really has to be done anyways." She didn't exactly _like_ paperwork, but it was something she knew how to do and it did not make her nervous. Besides, it gave her an excuse to want peace and quiet because she was working. _And,_ she thought to herself, _it's something I think I am actually good at._

* * *

Elsa was jerked out of her train of thought awhile later when she heard shouting out in the hall. She sighed and closed her eyes when she realized just who was shouting. _Mama and Papa are arguing again. They don't sound horribly mad, but…_

"I thought the girls would be down at the docks!" Agdar exclaimed, genuinely sounding hurt.

"Agdar, I told you, they didn't know for sure that you were coming in the first place! Elsa shouldn't be out right now anyway!" Idun's voice sounded frustrated.

"Why ever not?"

Elsa was already headed for her door. "Papa, I'm sorry I was not there, but I didn't kn-"

Agdar took one look at her and frowned. "What happened this time?" he asked, his voice much softer than it had been just seconds before. "Go sit down, Elsa. You shouldn't even be attending a party tonight." Although Agdar still was not a big fan of hugs in general, he was quite sure that Elsa probably really, really wanted one, and so he hugged her rather abruptly before pulling away.

Elsa was surprised, but the gesture, however awkward, made her smile. _Papa hugged me! Without me even asking!_ she thought happily. She instinctively flinched when her father touched her temple lightly, asking where that scar had come from. "I…don't know?" she said honestly. Elsa was not a fan of staring at herself in the mirror, so she hadn't noticed any mark on her face, but surely Anna or Gerda or someone would have told her or at least noticed. _Wait…that's where I knocked myself out with my magic when dark-me was in control because of that serum thing. That's what it's from, whatever it is._ "I think it might be from when dark-me made all that mess. I may have, well…knocked myself out so I wouldn't cause any more problems or danger."

"You did _what_?" Agdar suddenly wished he hadn't asked. It was clear Elsa hadn't even noticed it, and she seemed more worried about how he would react than anything else. He patted her shoulder and then pushed her toward the comfy chair in the corner. "Go sit. You've probably been working too much."

"Quit snapping at her. The last few days have _not_ been good!" Idun had honestly wanted to spend more time with her daughter than she had been, but she'd figured it would be better to just let Elsa alone, since it was clear that being around either of her parents for too long made her tense. This made Idun upset, but she felt like she couldn't really blame Elsa for it, either.

"What happened?"

"Well, for one, several prisoners in the dungeon-"

"Mama." Elsa's voice was quiet but firm. "I'll…I'll say it. I was, um…attacked while my magic was all tired out, and I couldn't defend myself," she said simply, trying to be as vague as she could while still telling the truth.

Agdar frowned, not liking Elsa's this-is-the-truth-but-I'm-not-really-saying-everything tone. _Who would have done that, and why?_ "I hope you punished them for such behavior," he said after a moment. "Where are these people now? I'll give them a piece of my mind!"

Elsa cringed at that. _He doesn't even suspect what I did. What if Papa thinks I wasn't justified in executing them? What if he's…scared of me again because I did it with my ice? What if…_

"Well, Elsa, where are they?"

"I…I…" Elsa felt her magic tingling in her fingers, and her stomach felt tight. She looked down at the floor and then just closed her eyes. _He's going to find out sooner or later. It may as well be from me._ "Th-they are d-dead," she stuttered finally, and then just clumsily backed away and slammed her door shut. Elsa plopped herself right where she was on the floor before she could slip or fall, and she covered her face with ice-cold hands, snowflakes floating around her again. _Don't break down, Elsa, don't, don't, don't. And stop thinking about that man's expression right before you killed him._ She could hear loud knocking on her door, but she ignored it.

Elsa did, however, notice when something touched her shoulder, and she instinctively flinched. "I'm sorry, I-"

"Elsa, stop it. Stop apologizing this instant," Agdar ordered, but his expression was gentle despite the harsh tone. He brushed a stray wisp of hair out of her face and forced a smile. "You didn't do anything wrong, _Queen_ Elsa," Agdar said quietly, purposely stressing the title. "Not only are you legally in the right, it sounds to me like you merely did your duty to prevent these people from hurting anyone else. That's a good thing." He paused before adding, "I know I treated you poorly in the past, but do not let that make you think whatever happens is your fault somehow. You're a good girl, Elsa, and while I may still dislike that magic of yours, I do trust you. You have good judgment, and I know you would never execute people needlessly."

Elsa was silent for a minute, but then she just whispered, "Thank you," and nodded. She was still unused to compliments of any kind from Agdar, and just didn't know how to react. Her daddy had outright said he trusted her despite her magic, and the fact that he actually sounded sincere in saying that made her heart leap for joy. He would probably never really like or accept her magic, but she didn't need that to be happy. Anna accepted her magic, and that was enough. She could not _make_ her daddy like or accept her magic, and she knew now that was not her problem. _I'm actually okay with that now,_ Elsa thought in surprise. _I still wish Papa would, but it doesn't make me so…hurt anymore that he does not._

* * *

Elsa wished Meri would stay for the party, but after offering her a ride on Linnae back to her brothers, she was eager to leave, although she grinned and gave Elsa a small package before doing so, saying she needed the things in the package no longer and that they might be of use to Elsa. In return, Elsa gave Meri a dose of magic water so she could get out of the magic cloaking Arendelle and its neighbors from the rest of the world. "Here is a bit extra should you ever wish to visit at some point in the future," Elsa said with a smile. "Do not let anyone know you have it."

Meri nodded. "I know there's something you aren't sharing, but I won't ask," she said bluntly. The older girl's expression let her know all too easily that there was SOMETHING about the future she knew already that she was not sharing. "You've been a great help to me. You found my brothers…!"

"Well, Emily found them, not me. She just told me about them," Elsa pointed out, but Meri was having none of it.

"Maybe so, but you could've killed me when you first met me, and you didn't. You helped instead." Meri hesitated before looking down at the tiny bottle of magic water in her hand and holding it back out to Elsa. "I…as much as I want this, I don't think I should take it," she said slowly. "You looked way too worried about me potentially letting somebody know I have it. That means it's dangerous for both of us for me to have it."

Elsa was silent for a moment as she mulled over what Meri had just said. Should she tell the redhead what that old troll had told her? About more lands like hers that were hidden by magic from the rest of the world? About the whole…disturbing…ice master thing? If she didn't give Meri the magic water, she would probably never see her again. Earlier she'd realized she really couldn't find Salma and Ahmed or Katie and her parents, either. Even with Linnae's help, she had no way to track them down without knowing their location ahead of time. _I wish I had given them contact crystals or something…_ "If I don't let you take it, I'll never see you again," she said finally, her voice cracking at the end. "I still don't know you very well, but I do consider you a friend."

"And you actually _care_ that much about that?" Meri asked incredulously. Although Meri had rather grown fond of Elsa, who she'd originally thought was just a prissy young ruler who happened to have ice powers, she was surprised that Elsa would call her a friend. Meri did, however, have absolutely zero patience for Elsa's tears. "It's not worth _crying_ over!"

Elsa looked away, her blue eyes still bright with tears. "I apologize for being emotional. I don't want to lose anyone else. I cannot find little Katie or anyone else I know in the States either," she said softly. _Meri's right, though,_ a little voice reminded her. _You have to protect everyone even when it hurts. Right now that means not sending magic outside Arendelle where it could potentially be stolen or studied, or cause panic._

"Why not use your powers to find your friends? And, now that I'm thinking about it, how's it dangerous for me to have your magic water? You could just save the day easily if something weird happened."

"I can't use it to find people. Or, at the very least, I don't know how," Elsa replied truthfully. "Meri, I know it doesn't seem like it sometimes, but my magic does have limits. You know the general bit of how I hurt my leg. I could not pass that odd mirror test for 'masters'. All I did was get myself exhausted and injured…and then couldn't defend myself from those criminals, either. I'm still just a human girl that can be hurt by conventional means if my opponent is smart or I'm weakened somehow."

Meri looked Elsa right in the face. "You need to learn how to fight and defend yourself by conventional means, then, queen or not. I'm no magic expert, obviously, but…I don't know. I think it's your fate to do something awesome. It's not a coincidence that you and other mages are the only ones that can get in and out of this cloaking thing. And if I'm right, well…hey, have you ever seen the _Star Wars_ movies? Meri laughed when Elsa just stared at her, clearly not understanding. "I guess not, there's no way you would have. Never mind." _She would probably be a Jedi master or something in that world. And dark-Elsa would definitely be a Sith lord._ "I just mean, I think you have a special place in the world, and it's not just being queen of Arendelle, either. Maybe do some research with that fire mage Emily. I think she's special too. There have to be more like you and her."

Elsa decided to share part of Grand Pabbie's words. "That troll said there are more lands like Arendelle. Ones hidden from the world because of magic," she said quickly.

Meri's eyes danced excitedly. "Well, then there's your answer. There _are_ more mages out there! You just need to figure out where and how many and what you are supposed to do." She smiled and climbed on Linnae's back. "And become an ice master!"

* * *

AT THE PARTY THAT EVENING…

"I will find her. I'm sure she's just running a bit late," Anna told everyone in the ballroom that evening. Elsa was supposed to have arrived about ten minutes before, and she hadn't shown up. Anna was fairly certain that Elsa wasn't in trouble and just didn't want to come to her own party…and was probably hoping no one would notice she was missing.

Anna tried to look elegant as she walked out of the ballroom, but the second she was at the stairs, she ran up as fast as she could and headed straight for Elsa's room. The room was spotless and not all covered with ice or snow, but Elsa was nowhere to be seen. "Elsa, where are you?" Anna mumbled to herself as she ran down the hall to her own room. There was a slight draft, which Anna took to be a sign that Elsa was somewhere nearby, but she had to be hiding because Anna couldn't see her. Anna bit her lip and looked in her messy closet and then under the bed.

No Elsa.

"Elsa, I know you're here somewhere," Anna called aloud. It was colder near one wall, and Anna suddenly remembered something. The entrance into the secret passages was right behind that wall. _Maybe Elsa crawled in there? I'll never be able to find her! I don't know those passages nearly as well as she does…wait, it doesn't matter. Elsa couldn't have got too far in there with her leg hurt. If she's in there she's probably right inside the entrance._ It took Anna a few minutes to remember how to open the entrance the way Elsa had shown her, but soon the 'door' slid up. Sure enough, there was Elsa just inside the entrance, one arm curled across her tummy, her other hand leaving frost on the floor beside her. "Elsa, it's all right. You'll do fine and-"

"I got sick," Elsa interrupted, her voice barely a whisper. "I was getting ready, and I just…" Elsa's voice trailed off, and she looked up at Anna hesitantly, her cheeks pink in embarrassment. _I'm sorry. I really was going to come down when I was supposed to._

Anna ran to close and lock her room's door before coming back and kneeling next to her sister. Elsa was dressed in her purple and green outfit that coordinated with Anna's, but her hair was loose and falling in her eyes, as if she'd run off and hid in the middle of getting ready, which Anna knew was exactly what had happened. "Elsa, it's all right," Anna said again, reaching for Elsa and giving her a hug. "Did you just get scared thinking about the party or what?"

Elsa shrugged and tried her best to relax. Although she had not actually panicked, she could feel her heart racing and her stomach still felt like it was doing flip flops. "I don't know. I was getting ready and I just kept picturing all the things that might go wrong and I…I threw up. I d-don't feel well," she admitted reluctantly. She felt like there was a knot in her tummy with magic swirling and tumbling around it, and her head ached. And her broken leg was in agony because her magic was all agitated. Elsa scrunched her eyes shut and clung to Anna, not knowing what to do. _Elsa, you are being ridiculous. Don't ruin the evening for everyone else just because you're scared._

"Elsa, I know you're scared right now, but you are not going to lose control or mess up everything or hurt anyone. You're letting me hold you right this second and you aren't hurting me or losing control beyond some snowflakes. And nobody in that ballroom downstairs is going to laugh at you if you freeze up and don't know what to say or something. They wouldn't laugh if they saw you right this second, for that matter." Anna didn't say anything about Elsa's death grip on her arm; she just squeezed her closer.

"I _know_ that, but I still got scared," Elsa spat. She sounded absolutely disgusted, and Anna knew she was more angry at herself than Anna. "I thought, 'Elsa, you know nothing will happen. You _know_ that!', but it didn't help. I just…I don't know." She bit her lip as she pulled away and added, "And I know it sounds petty, but my leg really, really hurts right now. It feels like all the upset magic went and settled there and is making it pulse and burn and explode like…like lightning or something." Elsa had no idea how to describe it, but that in of itself scared her. She could feel herself breathing too fast, and it wasn't entirely because she was frightened and upset, either. Anna had already helped her calm down, at least mostly.

Anna frowned. She could help Elsa calm down, but she honestly sounded at least mostly calm now and her leg still hurt. Anna could not fix that. _If Elsa is trying to describe her pain, it must be really, really bad. She usually claims there's nothing wrong…_ "Why'd you come here to hide?" she said finally, trying to just get Elsa's mind off her leg.

Now Elsa smiled. "Because I didn't want anyone to find me, but I didn't want to worry you, either. I knew you'd find me here at least fairly quickly once you saw that I wasn't in my room. Let's…let's go to the party." She winced as Anna helped her out of the entrance into the passages, but she honestly felt much better now, aside from her leg still hurting. Elsa sat still on Anna's bed while Anna quickly fixed her hair. "Just don't do anything eccentric to it, Anna," she deadpanned.

Anna giggled. "I'm just doing a little braid over the top, clipping it on the side, and leaving the rest loose. It'll look pretty and will just take a minute." She paused before adding, "And I'll stay right next to you the whole time at the party so's you don't have to talk to anybody unless you want to."

Elsa did not really want to leave her hair down, but she didn't say anything about it. She looked down at her hands and clasped them together tightly in her lap. "I will be okay. You don't have to do that. I know you were looking forward to dancing, especially with Kristoff."

Anna just looked at her quizzically. Elsa did not _look_ okay. She was doing her nervous hand-clasping thing, and Anna could tell that Elsa's leg was still hurting her, despite her efforts to hide that. "I can dance with him anytime, and he doesn't like dancing anyways. And besides I want to help you be happy at your own birthday party!"

"I don't want to mess up your evening! It makes me happy that you'd be willing to do that, but I'm not worth-"

"You know what, Elsa?" Anna started indignantly, "That's not your decision! It's _my_ time, and I say you are worth it. You are not going to tell me what is or isn't worth my time. You think I'm worth letting doing what I want with my time?" Anna frowned, thinking that phrase didn't really make much sense but not knowing how else to say it. "Ok, that sounds awkward, but you know what I mean."

Elsa smiled a tiny bit and nodded. "Of course you have value to do what you please with your own time, but…" she paused, trying to figure out how to explain what she wanted to say, "but the _only_ reason this inane party is happening is because you deserve a party without me ruining it by losing control or getting sick. That and after everything that's happened I wanted to give all the people a fancy event to enjoy. I may hate big parties, but I know most people don't. My point is if I wasn't going to be there, you would be flitting about socializing and dancing and having a grand time, not stuck with a shy wallflower that quite honestly couldn't dance even if she wanted to. Does…does that make sense?" _Anna, please understand…_

Anna carefully helped Elsa stand up and just gave her a winning smile. "I'll still be having a grand time _with_ being 'stuck with a shy wallflower'," she said firmly. "Come on, Elsa. I'm going to make sure you have fun, too."

"Are you sure I at least look okay?" Elsa asked. "No dust or anything from sitting in the passages?"

Anna brushed the one bit of dust she could see off Elsa's shoulder and then just looked critically at her for a moment. "Wait a minute. You look fine, but I do have one idea. Hold on." She dug around in a drawer and pulled out some green and purple ribbon that matched Elsa's dress. "You just stay still, 'kay? And close your eyes!"

Elsa heard rustling as Anna moved about, felt something tickle her cheek as Anna most likely tied a ribbon in her hair, and then heard more rustling and a horrid scraping sound. "What are you doing?"

"Moving the mirror. Don't open your eyes yet!" Anna darted back beside her sister and stood beside her before telling her to open her eyes. "Ok, now!"

Elsa stared at herself and Anna in the mirror for a few seconds and then couldn't help smiling. _I actually look okay. I don't look stupid or anything, and Anna looks pretty. I'll be fine at the party-I have Anna with me_. "I'm still nervous, but I don't feel ill or headache-y anymore."

Anna just hugged her close _._ "I'm glad."

 **A/N: So Anna finally got to read little Elsa's story.:)**

 **And...yeah, Elsa's dark streak made a tiny appearance. She is dead serious...if someone (especially Pabbie) ever kills Anna and she can't do anything about it, she will find them and kill them...and then get rid of herself, too.**

 **There's going to be a (sort of big?) reveal next chapter, so while this story will end on a happy note and not a real cliffhanger, there will be some hints as to what will happen in the future for Elsa and everyone else.:)**

 **Yep, there's ONE more chapter. I have finished the story, though, so the real last chapter will be up next Thursday (or maybe even this Saturday if I get impatientXD). :)**


	48. Chapter 48

**A/N: Thanks to everyone who followed/favorited and/or is reading but not reviewing:)**

 **Olivia O'Neil-I'm glad you liked it!:) Yeah, Agdar is treating Elsa much better now. He might still be awkward and snap at her sometimes, but he does care about her.:)**

 **Elsa Tomago-Elsa probably shouldn't have let Anna be there when she and Emily were trying to experiment with their magic, but in my mind Anna had really really wanted to watch and besides, Elsa's broken leg hasn't healed yet, so she needed _someone_ to help her if she's going to be experimenting with her magic. Therefore Anna was helping her.:) Argh, Elsa's "The Littlest Elemental" story was actually one I made up a long while back, wrote down...and then deleted because I hated it. Yeah. Blech. I was very glad it was useful for this story, though.:) I am highly tempted to write it out with Anna's ending...:P Elsa isn't suicidal at this point; she's mostly okay now, but deep inside she knows she can't live without Anna, and yes, that's what I thought too-she literally _needs_ Anna to survive. I can't see Anna killing herself if something happened to Elsa (I think she would probably go on a vengeance raid and then quiet down and probably name her child after Elsa or something and tell the kid e.v.e.r.y.t.h.i.n.g. about Elsa), but...yeah. I'm glad you liked the chapter:)**

 **IndyGirl89-I tried to show that Elsa is much more willing to be open about things now, a year after the Great Thaw. She might still get all upset and freak out (ie., making herself sick because she's so anxious), but she told Anna about it and didn't run off up the North Mountain. She just hid in the passages, knowing Anna would find her fairly quickly.:P That's what I figured-Sven can't tattle on Elsa, and he won't accidentally say something upsetting, either. :))**

 **On to the LAST CHAPTER~eee, I can't believe it! ^_^**

"Still all right?" Anna whispered to Elsa so only she would hear. Per Elsa's idea, no one was on the dais tonight. ("It's awfully presumptuous to sit up there at my own birthday party," had been Elsa's exact words, which Anna thought was technically true but no one would think that except for Elsa herself.) Tables were set up along the walls, leaving the middle open for dancing. Instead of the royal family, the dais simply held the decorations Anna had had made for the party and two large detailed sculptures Elsa had made-one of Arendelle castle and the other of the ice palace.

Elsa nodded, and she was not feigning being okay for Anna's sake, not this time. If she was honest with herself, there was still a small knot in her stomach and her magic was definitely not calm-she could feel it stirring about nervously just under her skin-but she was fine. There were no snowflakes floating around her and she did not feel like she was about to panic, either. _I can't believe I'm actually at a party and not feeling all panicky. I don't feel great, but I'm okay. I really am fine._ She had purposely chosen a small table in a corner, and that helped, too, since she didn't have to be directly in the spotlight up on that dais the whole time. This table was only big enough for four, but only she, Anna, and Gerda were sitting there. "Gerda, I'm so, so glad Anna convinced you to take the evening off entirely," Elsa said, smiling.

Gerda frowned and shook her head. "It isn't proper for your old servant to be sitting at the table at your-the queen's!-birthday party," she said firmly. The only thing that had talked her into this was when Anna had said that Elsa would enjoy herself more with an older adult that she trusted sitting at 'her' table. It was clear to Gerda that Anna had been right; Elsa's smile told her that. But she still didn't like it. She knew both royal sisters had meant this whole event to be an event for everyone and that they wanted to mingle with their people, but still.

"It is perfectly proper," Elsa said confidently, holding her head high. "And you are not just an old servant. You took-and take-care of me, and Anna, for that matter, far beyond what duty would call for."

"Miss Elsa, what must your parents think?" Gerda asked, shaking her head. "A royal's birthday celebration with everyone in the country invited? There isn't even enough room and many people are outdoors in the courtyard. Look, it's packed in here."

Elsa's cheeks turned pink. "I didn't think anywhere near this many people would show up," she said honestly, which made both Anna and Gerda frown. "And my parents are dancing. I see them over there."

"Good grief, Elsa, lots of people were probably dying to get to attend a party at the castle. A party for YOUR birthday just made that idea even more awesome, you stinker." Anna made a face, not liking how Elsa seemed to think that people didn't like her enough to bother coming. "See, there's a couple more people coming over here right now!"

Elsa immediately recognized the people as Netta and a man she guessed was her husband, and she relaxed. Netta didn't make her nervous since she at least sort of knew her. She wished Netta had brought her baby Eva, because then she would just hold the baby-now a young toddler most likely-if Netta would let her.

"Wonderful party, Queen Elsa, Princess Anna! If Eva were a little older, she would love it too," Netta said. "Also, having magic, even temporarily, is quite the experience! We were delighted to be able to help stop that…explosive…magic thing…oh, I don't know what to call it."

"Exactly what you said: an explosive magic thing," Elsa deadpanned, only half joking. In her mind, that was exactly what the troll magic explosive was. She started to push her chair away from the table to stand up, but Anna tugged her back. "Anna, stop it. I am being rude," she whispered sharply. "Let me up!"

Netta frowned. "Pardon me, but I do not think you're being rude, Queen Elsa. We all know you were injured trying to protect everyone, and you are the queen besides," she pointed out.

"Netta and I brought you a gift," Netta's husband said, bowing politely before holding out a small package carefully wrapped in brown paper to Elsa.

Elsa wasn't sure whether to open her present right then or not until Anna poked her excitedly telling her to open it. Inside was a silver bracelet with her name engraved on it. Arendelle's crocus and a tiny snowflake were etched on either side of her name. _This looks expensive…they must have spent far too much money on me…why?_ "It's lovely, but you should not have bought me anything," she said quietly.

"Nonsense. We'll get out of the way. Looks like you have lots of other people that would love to speak with you," Netta said, eyeing the line of people behind her that had seemingly formed instantaneously. "I told you she would like it," Elsa heard Netta say to her husband as she walked away.

Elsa inwardly groaned when she saw all the people that she _knew_ just wanted to talk to her, and she was grateful for Anna's reassuring grip on her hand under the table. _I should let Anna go dance or something…_ She relaxed a little when she realized that a good number of the people were just children, or children with their parents.

"Can I have some more magic?" the freckle-faced little boy next in line with his parents asked excitedly. His father nudged him disapprovingly.

"Please excuse him, Queen Elsa. He's been playing with that water magic for days and was very disappointed that it appeared to have gone as of this morning. He's been causing all sorts of mischief with it, too!" The father sounded frustrated, but not disturbed or frightened.

Elsa was relieved to see no traces of fear in either the father's or the child's eyes, and she smiled. In a few seconds she had a tiny bottle containing a bit of magic water in her hand, and she handed it to the father. "Perhaps as a special treat after chores or school," she suggested. To the little boy she said, "I think your daddy might be more likely to let you have it if you don't go about causing mischief!"

"I left buckets of water over all the doors," the boy informed her gleefully. "It fell on Papa, and my teacher at school, and all my friends!"

Elsa's blue eyes twinkled at that; it reminded her of dropping snow on Anna or Kai or Gerda or something when she was little. She _still_ did that to Anna sometimes! "Maybe save it for a bully instead," she said knowingly.

The father sent his son over to get more food and then sighed. "Queen Elsa, why did you tell him that? I was hoping you might convince him not to do such things at all!"

"Well…" Elsa hesitated and looked down at her own hands for a moment before replying. "Can you honestly tell me there is no one you wanted to dump water on while you had the temporary water powers?" she asked finally. "Whether it be as a prank on someone you love, or someone irritating, or someone downright mean?"

"She dumps snow all over me sometimes," Anna piped in, which made Elsa's cheeks turn pink, "and thinks it's the greatest joke ever."

The father laughed and then bowed politely. "I think both you and Princess Anna answered the question!"

* * *

With Anna's help, Elsa didn't freeze up or panic once as she talked to all of those people in line. Whenever Anna sensed that Elsa was unsure what to say, she just jumped in herself, giving her shy older sister a moment to gather her thoughts. The children kept asking for more temporary magic, and except for one mother that seemed actually angry and said 'absolutely not!', Elsa fulfilled all of the children's requests. Anna grew worried when she realized Elsa's soft spot for making the children of Arendelle happy was making her tired. It took Elsa longer to make the water each time, and when she did, her hands were shaky. "Elsa, you need to stop. You promised yourself you wouldn't deplete your magic too much again," Anna whispered. "You know making water makes you tired way, way faster than making ice or snow."

Elsa had honestly already thought of that, but with Anna and Gerda beside her, the idea that she was depleting her magic didn't scare her anymore. And besides, she loved seeing the little kids' excited expressions when she gave them their little presents. "It's not fair to give some of the children something they want and not others," she whispered back.

"Tell them the truth. They'll understand."

Elsa didn't listen; she gave the next little girl and the twins after her more magic water too. Anna scowled. When the next child came up, she spoke up before Elsa had the chance. "Elsa isn't giving out any more water. She's tired," Anna said firmly.

"C'n I just have a teeny bit?" the child asked hopefully, undeterred by her parents' mortified expressions.

The child's mother shook her head. "No, you can't. You're old enough to know better. You can see Queen Elsa is tired," the woman told her disappointed daughter. "I'm sorry, Queen Elsa. She just loved having magic like you for a few days. Quite honestly, so did her father and I."

Elsa's blue eyes grew big in surprise. _They liked having magic? They weren't…mad at me for making everyone be stuck with magic for a little while…?_

"I do wish you had asked your people for help much, much sooner, Queen Elsa," the father said. "All but a scant few would have been honored to do so. I get the feeling you think Arendelle's citizens like and support you because they have to rather than because they want to. That isn't true."

Elsa could only stare at him in shock, and she had no idea what to say. "Well, I…I…thank y-you," she stuttered awkwardly. _Seriously, Elsa? You sound ridiculous. Get it together!_

"We like you," the man continued, paying no mind to Elsa's awkward stuttering, "because we know you care about everyone and will do anything to protect this country. You also let us have a glimpse at the very normal young woman behind the dignified queen aura on occasion. That makes you human and it lets us know you're trustworthy. Princess Anna, you should be proud to have someone like her for a sister."

Anna beamed and impulsively hugged a very startled Elsa tightly. "I _am_ proud of Elsa," she said happily. "She's the bestest sister anyone could ever ask for."

* * *

Though Elsa was tired, multiple people's statements that they loved her and Anna and that she should have asked for help sooner made her feel calm enough that she told Anna to go dance if she wanted to. Anna hesitated at first, but Elsa didn't seem to be pretending to be ok, so she hopped up and went to find Kristoff. "I'll come back every few minutes, Elsa," she promised. Elsa also told Gerda she could leave her too, but Gerda refused to leave.

"No, Miss Elsa, I shall stay right where I am. You gave me the evening off and I want to stay here," Gerda told her firmly. She was slightly worried that with all of the people in the castle, at least one wouldn't mean well, and she didn't want to leave Elsa alone with no one guarding her. Of course Elsa could protect herself now, and there were a few guards on duty patrolling the ballroom and halls, but someone could still sneak up on her or something. _Not that I would be much help if someone tried to hurt her, but…_

Elsa sighed. She was grateful for Gerda's company, but she wanted her surrogate mother to have some fun for herself instead of what amounted to babysitting her. The long, long line of people finally seemed to have dispersed, drifting toward some kind of kerfuffle in the opposite corner near the dais. Elsa tried to see, but there were too many people and she couldn't. "Gerda, can you see what's going on?" she asked curiously. "They sound angry!"

Gerda frowned. "My closest guess is that we have a mischief maker," she said, pointing at the little procession coming toward them. "A very wet mischief maker, I might add…"

Elsa stifled a giggle with her hand. There was a very disgusted Kristoff holding a soaking wet Hans by the collar. Several scowling children crowded behind them holding balls of magic water, and Anna looked like she was about to punch Hans. "That man had to have known he would not be welcome here," she said, shaking her head. The scene was so ridiculous to her.

"Elsa, he says he wants to talk to you because you didn't reply to his letter," Kristoff spat.

Elsa stood up with Gerda's help and just stared at Hans incredulously. "And I have already told you no," she said firmly. "Hans, you need to leave me alone. Stop harassing me. And stop asking my guards for a job, too!" It was hard for her to be actually angry at him right that second because the scene was still hilarious to her, but she wished he would get the message and just go away. "Everyone, back to your business. I will take care of this. Kristoff, let go of his collar."

The people (and Kristoff) looked disappointed, but they did listen.

But while Hans did look contrite, he still looked at her hopefully and tried to give her a sincere winning smile despite looking like he had just gone swimming. "El-Queen Elsa, might you consider just one dance or something similar?" he asked hopefully. "Then I promise I will leave you alone if you still want nothing to do with me. Well, I might send more letters…"

"Does it seriously look like I could dance with you, even if I wanted to, which I most definitely do not?" Elsa deadpanned. "Hans, I have a broken leg, in case you forgot."

Hans did at least have the decency to blush. His stubborn dream girl probably thought he was an idiot on top of wanting nothing to do with him. Of course Elsa could not dance with him or anyone else right now. _At least she doesn't look angry, I guess._ Elsa honestly looked like she was about to crack up laughing. "I'm sorry. That was insensitive."

"That should be easy for you, considering you tried to kill her last year," Anna informed him, scowling.

"Anna, he didn't mean any harm. Be quiet," Elsa said firmly. "That being said, Hans, I've told you multiple times I am not interested. Please let me be. You are making yourself look ridiculous. Go back to the Southern Isles with Kiara and try to repair things with your family. You claim to be a changed man. Prove it to your sister and your country, not me."

Hans's shoulders slumped, but he sighed and nodded. Then he straightened up and bowed. "I will come back for that dance, Queen Elsa," he said quietly. Before anyone could say anything in response, he reached to kiss Elsa's hand.

Elsa yelped and jerked her hand away before he could do that, nearly losing her balance. She suddenly wanted to go wash her hand about ten times and scrub it hard. _Elsa, that's a polite thing to do sometimes. It's okay. Stop freaking out because he touched you._

 _He didn't just touch me, he tried to_ kiss _me! Even if it was just my hand._

 _Stop it anyway. Don't you dare make a scene, Elsa._ Elsa felt herself trembling slightly all over, and she held her hand protectively against her chest, not wanting him to touch her again. "You need to leave. Now," she ordered as firmly as she could.

"I just-"

Kristoff stepped between Elsa and Hans and just glared at the shorter man. "You heard her. Get out of here," Kristoff said. "And don't you dare put a single finger on her ever again!"

Hans was honestly confused, not understanding why Elsa would have reacted like she did even if she didn't want anything to do with him. _She was scared, not just disgusted._ "I meant no harm. Tell her I apologize," he said quickly, and then he fled before Kristoff popped him in the nose.

Anna dashed after him, and no one tried to stop her, much to her relief. She trusted Gerda and Kristoff to make sure Elsa was ok and that she didn't come after her.

"I'd want to scrub my skin off," Kristoff said to Elsa, trying to get her to smile. He didn't think she was freaking out, but her eyes were big and round and she looked disgusted. When Elsa didn't react, Kristoff frowned. "Elsa, he's a stupid blockhead and I get why you don't want him touching you-or kissing your hand-but he's gone. Don't let somebody like him make you upset. You should've let me toss him out on his butt and all those kids dump more water on him."

Elsa sat back down at the table and scrubbed her hand with snow until it was nearly raw. _Much better. Just…ugh. I don't want anyone else touching me like that._ Then she folded her hands in her lap and glanced up at Kristoff. "I should have just let that man be embarrassed," she said flatly.

Kristoff grinned as he looked toward the doorway, where Anna was running back, clearly pleased about something. "I think Anna may have done just that for you," he said, pointing. "I should have just popped him in the nose before."

"I popped him in the nose," Anna informed them. She flexed a sore fist and then just hugged Elsa close. "I'm sorry I didn't, I don't know, get in the way or something," she whispered in Elsa's ear. Anna was glad Elsa seemed fine now, but she was still angry. "My issue is that he knew what happened with those creeps that tried to hurt her, and he still tried to do that without asking first," she said, directing her words at Kristoff. "It seems he overheard things the guards said and probably lots of people know what happened." She felt Elsa stiffen in her arms, and she was quick to reassure her. "No, Elsa, don't think whatever it is you're thinking. Nobody's going to say it to your face because it's rumors, but from what I understand, everyone is glad you executed them."

"How can anyone be glad I killed people?" Elsa asked softly, her words barely audible in the noisy ballroom. She was grateful for everyone understanding why she had acted as she did, but _glad_? That she could not understand.

"Because they like you, you stinker! They don't want you hurt, and if someone does do that, that someone deserves whatever worst punishment they can get." Anna scowled at the hand Elsa had scrubbed so hard, but she didn't fuss at Elsa for it, since quite honestly she probably would have done the same thing. She did, however, give Elsa's hand a squeeze. Anna was relieved when Elsa squeezed her hand back. The older girl still didn't look happy, but she didn't look upset anymore, either.

"It's probably not so much that they're glad you killed people but that they're glad they're gone and can't hurt you or Anna again," Kristoff put in. "I know that's true for me. Also, I, um, got you a sort of birthday present. But don't get too excited. Anna put it on your desk, though, because you probably don't want to-and shouldn't-let all these people see it."

Elsa was intrigued by this. _Kristoff got me a present and Anna knows what it is and put it in my room?_ "What is it?" she asked curiously. "Why shouldn't I open it here?"

Anna's eyes sparkled excitedly. "Because it's a secret! I've already seen it, though. The secret part isn't really a birthday present, though. The birthday present part is up in your room with the secret part."

Elsa sighed and leaned back in her seat. Not only had she already had quite enough of the party, now she just wanted to go see what this present was all about. After convincing Anna to go dance with Kristoff, Elsa took the chance to slip out of the ballroom. Gerda wasn't happy about that, saying that everyone would miss her, but she knew the young queen was probably tired on top of wanting to see that present. "My leg hurts. I want to go lie down," she protested. This was true, but Elsa wouldn't have left 'just' for that, and Gerda knew it.

"Miss Elsa, I believe that it hurts and you want to go lie down, but I do not believe that is even slightly the reason you want to leave," Gerda said, but she went with Elsa all the same.

* * *

Because Elsa trusted Gerda, she didn't mind Gerda staying in the room while she opened Kristoff's (and probably Anna's) present. The letter tucked beneath the string holding the package closed caught her attention first; the envelope simply had 'Elsa' written on it in Kristoff's blocky handwriting. When Elsa opened it and began to read, she smiled and happy tears filled her eyes. ' _Dear Elsa, I'm writing this together with Anna, so please excuse any odd spellings from me or inkblots from her. Thank you for not instantly deciding to keep Anna from seeing me. I'll be honest, I wasn't sure about you at first last year, seeing how you froze her. Actually, I wasn't sure about Anna, either. She was annoying and pushy and altogether too perky! You can be annoying too, but-_ ' The writing abruptly switched to Anna's here. ' _Don't listen to him, Elsa. You aren't annoying. What he means is that we're really happy together and you are one of the few humans he's decided he likes besides me.'_

Elsa giggled. She could easily picture Anna and Kristoff working on this letter together, and both of them good-naturedly fussing at the other. The writing switched back to Kristoff's, ' _All right, I suppose she's right. Your parents are not on that list, by the way. Neither were…mine. There is no excuse for turning little kids into genius nervous wrecks or naïve lovable goofs that think you can marry someone you just met. Sorry, Elsa. You do a great job anyways, and I think both you and Anna are way better than last year._

 _Anna again! I think we're way better than last year, too, Elsa. Although I don't think you're a nervous wreck. That's mean. I guess I might still be a 'naïve lovable goof' sometimes, though. Thanks a lot, Kristoff-not! It doesn't matter, though. I love you lots and lots, Elsa, nervous wreck or not. Back to Kristoff now…_

 _By the way, Elsa, I know you'll think the 'secret' part is from the trolls, and technically it is, but it was my idea to give it to you. Grand Pabbie didn't even want to at first. I said it was the least he could do after that whole mirror incident. The non-secret part is just something stupid, I guess, but Anna said you would like it. She helped with the paint._

 _~Kristoff_

 _P.S. It still feels a little odd to just call you 'Elsa', but Anna says you wouldn't want it any other way, so. Elsa._

Elsa had first been angry that the secret thing had been from the trolls, but then she thought if it was something Pabbie hadn't wanted her to have, it was probably something she _should_ have. Besides, she knew Kristoff didn't mean her any harm, and Anna seemed to think whatever it was was okay, so she thought it was probably fine. She untied the string holding the brown paper that wrapped the package, and a wooden sculpture of sorts plopped into her lap. "Gerda, look!" she exclaimed a second later. Elsa set it up on her desk and just stared at it. There stood a miniature version of her and Anna smiling back at her. The wooden Elsa and Anna didn't look like they were posing for some formal painting or other artwork either; they were ice-skating and it looked like Kristoff had captured them right as Anna was about to lose her balance and Elsa was helping her. Though it was only about a foot tall or so, Elsa thought it was awfully detailed. The paint too for that matter. "It must have taken them ages to make this," she said softly.

"Well, I know Mr. Bjorgman likes carving things, so he may have started it awhile ago and decided to paint it and add more details later." Gerda chuckled as she looked closer at the sculpture. "He even got Miss Anna's and your expressions right."

"If he can carve like this, he should make commissioned ones and sell them," Elsa said. "I mean…" She paused when she heard a knock on her door. "Gerda, please go see who-wait, never mind. It's Anna. And she barged in," Elsa deadpanned.

"You disappeared!" Anna scolded. "I knew you came up here, but still! I brought Kristoff, too, so he could see what you thought of your present. I helped paint it," she said proudly. "Although Kristoff did most of the itty bitty details. See, I smudged my eye. After that he wouldn't let me do any more of the little bits. I did the larger sections, though."

Elsa laughed. "I think it's perfect just the way it is. Kristoff, you didn't have to waste who knows how long making something this nice for me, either. You should make commissioned carvings and sell them instead."

Kristoff wrinkled his nose. "Then it wouldn't be fun anymore. I've made some toy animals and donated 'em to the orphanage before, but that's it. That one is the largest one I've ever made-that's not an ice sculpture, that is. I usually just make small ones. They aren't that good anyway."

"I beg to differ. You managed to make both Anna and me look like we were moving and you happened to catch one moment of it. The bodies don't look stiff or weirdly proportioned, and you made detailed faces, too. And you, Anna…I know you said you smudged the eye, but it still looks nice. Maybe you should paint some more too!" Elsa gave both of them a lopsided smile. "I have no idea how to carve anything, but I've tried drawing people before, and I can't. Not well, anyways. I can just imagine how hard it is to make three-dimensional art of people."

Anna grinned. "You can make three-dimensional art of people in a second with your magic!"

"That doesn't count!" Elsa protested, but she was laughing. "Anna, would you please set it up on top of my dresser? I might put it in the library, but I want it in here for now." She frowned as she reached for the antique-looking small scroll that still lay in the brown paper her actual present had been wrapped up in. _Okay, here goes nothing._

And the scroll dropped to the floor seconds later.

* * *

Everyone was awkwardly silent. Elsa felt like she could hear every tiny sound…a floorboard creaking, fabric rustling, her own breathing. She fancied she could her herself _blinking_. "I…are you sure I'm one of them?" Elsa asked finally, breaking the silence.

Kristoff looked her right in the eyes. "At this point, yes. I'd forgotten about that 'legend' for the longest time. I remembered it while I was taking you and Anikka back home to the castle after the mirror test. If the old magic mirror was real, I realized Grand Pabbie's other stories he told to entertain me and the kid trolls were probably either true or partly true. But this legend isn't a legend…it's a sort of prophecy of sorts. Not like we all think of a prophecy in a fairy tale, though."

Elsa just shifted in her chair uncomfortably. She did not want to be in a prophecy, and quite honestly the idea made her skin crawl. "What if I don't want to go along with this whole destiny thing? Maybe I just don't want to have anything to do with it! What happens if I refuse?"

"That's just it. This 'legend' doesn't force you to do a thing. Did you read the whole thing? There are other natural mages, other people like you. At any one point in human history after the flood, there's been one person who could, you know, fulfill this and fix everything. But either they don't know or they've refused or the power has gone to their head. You don't _have_ to do this, Elsa. But I thought you at least deserved to know about it." Kristoff glanced at Gerda and then back at Elsa. "You trust Gerda. Read it aloud to her and see what she thinks."

Elsa picked up the scroll and just looked down at it miserably. " _'On Earth did appear a natural mage of pure heart,_

 _Able to withstand Dover's dart._

 _Willing to sacrifice self for all,_

 _Despite the impossibility of it at all._

 _The League of Seven the mage shall assemble_

 _Otherwise magic in the world will crumble._

 _Though the cost be vast,_

 _The pain shall soon pass._

 _A loved one's demise may be inevitable,_

 _But vengeance only leads to trouble._

 _Lives have been stolen, yes 'tis true,_

 _And a master's fury derived from love should be rued.'_ " Elsa's expression crumpled, and she pointed at Anna with one hand and slammed the old scroll on her desk with the other. "She _dies_! I'm not having anything to do with this! I won't!" she blurted. Elsa banged her fist on the desk for emphasis, angry tendrils of frost slipping unheeded from her hand. She noticed but didn't care. Elsa was just about to shout at Kristoff as to why on earth he would think this was even remotely a good idea when she felt Anna's warm arms just helping her stand up and hugging her tightly. _Anna's right here. I don't have to do this. So there._

"Elsa, shh. Quit taking everything so…face-value-y. You ought to know by now that Grand Pabbie is anything but literal and straightforward." Anna squeezed Elsa tighter, wishing the older girl would stop trembling. She could tell Elsa was angry, but more than that she was just plain frightened. "Kristoff and I already looked at that scroll, him way more than I did. It doesn't say 'Anna is going to die', Elsa. It says 'a loved one's demise may be inevitable'. Not 'will be'…' _may be_ '. Also, 'a loved one' could be lots of people, not just me, you stinker."

"Then why does it say 'lives have been stolen'?" Elsa shot back, her cold hands clutching Anna's for dear life. _It's too coincidental. I told Kristoff before that I would kill someone if they killed Anna and I could not stop it…_

Kristoff answered this time. "Number one, as Anna pointed out to me, 'lives' is plural. 'A loved one' is singular. It's referring to a different thing or incident entirely, at the very least. Also, someone's life could be stolen from him or her without killing them," he said quietly.

Elsa frowned, not understanding, but then realization hit her. She remembered a horrible nightmare she had had a few times as a teenager after her parents had put her in the dungeon those two times during storms. Elsa could still recall with great clarity waking up from those dreams thinking she was trapped in the dungeon and then being very, very relieved she was really just in the gilded cage of her room. _If I had grown up locked down there, that would have been stealing my life. Good grief, if I'm honest with myself, I…I still feel like Papa sort of stole something from me._

 _Elsa, that's ridiculous. Just stop it. He tried his best._

 _I know. But still._ "I…I think those white trolls Grand Pabbie told me about that steal magic have other people like me trapped somehow," she whispered finally.

"That's the conclusion I came to, too," Anna told her. "I don't know how, though…"

Elsa looked down at her hands and then back at Anna. _If our logic is right, they're incapacitated from fighting back somehow._ "I do. So do you. And I'm going to help. But first, I am going to make sure you are safe. I won't risk your safety, and I want more information."

"Miss Elsa, you might want to consider also that your new friend Emily may be the leader of this 'League of Seven'. Perhaps she's the natural mage in the poem," Gerda said hesitantly. Part of her didn't even want Elsa to take on this role at all. She worried either Elsa herself or Anna would end up horrendously injured or dead. They didn't deserve any more dangerous situations, ever. Not to mention Elsa's penchant for always putting herself in danger and then ending up hurt even if she did succeed in saving everyone she was trying to rescue.

"If I may say so, I don't think it's Elsa's friend. Emily might be a member of the League of Seven, but I don't think she's the leader. The poem says 'willing to sacrifice self for all, despite the impossibility of it at all'. Lousy rhyming, but…" Kristoff paused and pointed at Elsa's leg. "That proves it's Elsa. She's already shown she's willing to sacrifice herself for the good of everyone when she tried so hard to beat the mirror when she knew she couldn't. She technically did it a bunch of other times too, but since this is related directly with magic and trolls, I think it's the mirror test incident that really counts."

"Every time Miss Elsa goes on one of these…adventures, she succeeds in whatever it is but ends up hurt in the process! I am fully confident that she could do whatever this saving magic thing is, but she is just going to end up hurt again, and we could all lose Miss Anna, too," Gerda protested. Though the girls were not hers, she loved them like they were her own daughters, and she couldn't stand willingly supporting the idea of sending them on some crazy-sounding mission they all knew little about.

Elsa's statement of, "I don't care what happens to me as long as Anna is safe," didn't reassure any of them, least of all Gerda.

Gerda just stared at her for a good ten seconds before replying. "You do care, Miss Elsa. Otherwise you wouldn't have made an effort to defend yourself when those men tried to assault you," she said quietly. "I also know you'll say you did it 'because Anna would want me to', but I know part of it was also a girl defending herself because she knew she didn't deserve that." Gerda shooed both Anna and Kristoff out, saying that they should go back to the party and come back later.

Elsa, who had honestly forgotten all about the party downstairs, nodded. "But I want one last hug first, Anna, please."

* * *

A FEW MINUTES LATER…

Now in bed, happy nobody had suggested she go back downstairs to her own party, Elsa looked up at Gerda quizzically. "I'm grateful you're always been so understanding to me, but just…why?"

Gerda frowned. _I thought Elsa was over that. She's seemed so much better recently, aside from those people hurting her._ She answered carefully. "Why do you think, Miss Elsa?"

"I don't know! I wouldn't ask if I knew," came Elsa's slightly grumpy response, but she wasn't really mad. She just didn't like it when Gerda tried to use some psychology thing on her.

"Just think for a minute."

There was a short silence before Elsa said a bit shakily, "Because you…love me?" Her eyes felt hot, and she blinked several times to ward off tears. _Elsa, of course that's why. Don't be ridiculous. And don't cry. Not only_ should _you be better now, you_ are _better now_. "Wait, that doesn't make sense, because it's possible to love someone and still not really be understanding…"

Gerda gently brushed a bit of hair out of Elsa's face and just smiled at her. "I do love you, Miss Elsa, very much actually, but as for being understanding…I've known you since you were born. I remember little toddler you being so happy with her magic and just being a sweet little girl, even if you were mischievous sometimes. I saw you grow up. You could have turned out differently-in a bad way, like that Hans-but you didn't. You might still have issues, but I still see the same Elsa Grieg I saw twenty-one-well, twenty-two now!-years ago."

Elsa thought maybe she wasn't quite so 'sweet' as Gerda thought, considering she had firmly decided she would permanently get rid of someone that was successful in killing Anna if that ever, ever happened. "I killed those men, Gerda. And if someone ever does that to Anna…" she trailed off. Gerda would know what she meant.

"You did your duty, nothing more," Gerda said firmly. "That doesn't make you a bad person. As for executing someone for killing your little sister, that would be justified as well. Just…Miss Elsa, do be careful it doesn't turn to revenge. I saw dark-Elsa. She was certainly not evil, but she was dangerous. Do you understand that?"

Elsa nodded. "Dark-Elsa is like an…a very, very angry normal me, maybe."

Gerda took Elsa by the hands and looked her straight in the face. "I don't believe that's completely true, Miss Elsa. I've seen normal you angry. You can be…unnerving when you're angry, but it's not the same. I'm no magic expert, of course, but I know you. And I see how much you love Arendelle and the people in it, especially Anna. If you decide to go on this odd mission thing from that poem, don't let the real you change. Don't be fooled by thinking dark-Elsa is needed. I know you used that dark streak to be able to follow through with what needed to be done with those executions, and that's fine."

"But don't let it ever truly be in charge," Elsa finished. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath before opening her mouth to say something else, but Gerda answered before she could do so.

"Yes, but also, don't let it be in charge, do something you'll regret, and then 'get rid of' yourself to somehow atone for it. I know how you think."

"Gerda, I…that's not the only reason my dark streak can't be in control," Elsa said quietly. "I don't know how to explain this, but that power…it…it feels good. My magic loved it when that serum poisoned me because dark-me was willing to throw around my magic willy-nilly. I hated worrying I might hurt Anna and things like that, but…my magic…my ice…it felt so _alive_. It was completely happy with me. It made me feel strong, invincible, like I could do anything. I could feel it in my bones." She looked down at her hands as she added, "I didn't feel like a weak, scared little girl anymore. And I know that sounds awful…" _Gerda won't think of me the same way anymore. What if she's scared of me?_

 _That's ridiculous. She wouldn't do that, Elsa. You know that. Anna didn't think that when you explained it to her, either. They love you, no matter what._

Gerda thought for a minute before replying, knowing whatever she said would be important. "I think that sounds human, Miss Elsa. I also think that your magic doesn't need your dark self to be happy with you," she said gently. "What does it feel like right now?"

Elsa mulled that over and then just shrugged. "It's just there. Just…pleasant coolness. I do know it's…more attuned with what I want it to do than before, even not all that long ago. Its automatic reactions are more reliably helpful now." Another moment's thought, and she went on, "I think it likes me better now than, say, six months ago, because I like it better too. And even though it hurt really, really badly earlier this evening because of it when I felt so anxious about that party, I think it's trying to help heal my leg faster. I don't know how, but I'm sure of it."

"See, that proves it. You don't need any dark self for your powers to 'be happy with you'. I'll bet you can feel that alive, invincible sensation you described without it, too." Gerda gave her a hug, and was happy to see that Elsa was smiling again.

"I have to become an ice master." _And protect my country and Anna, and save magic...eventually. I can do it as long as I have help._ "And use that power to protect everyone…including the missing mages like me."

 _Anna will help me take care of everything._

 **the end...**

 **...for now!**

 **A/N: Yeah, I'm a rotten poet. I spent so long on that stupid legend/prophecy thing...I started it literally months ago, lol, and I'm still not 100% satisfied with it, but...yeah. I guess the trolls are going to be bad at poetry in my story-verse. XD**

 **Okay, so this epically long story is over, but there will be more in the saga about Elsa and her family and friends!:) I suppose this is obvious since I pretty much dropped a bomb near the end, but I wanted it to end here, with Elsa's birthday and her being mostly relaxed and happy, and sort of confident that she can pull off everything she needs to do. Elsa still doesn't like social events, but she can handle them now. She's not perfect when it comes to her magic (and probably never will be since she is after all, human and makes mistakes), but she can control it and she no longer wants her powers to go away. She may not love them, but she's okay with being different, especially since she now knows there are other people like her. And she's willing to do what has to be done at this point-I don't think Elsa would have been able to deal with a lot of the stuff that happened in this story back in, say, The Coming Storm. So she's stronger now, both inside and physically with her powers themselves. It's been one year since the Great Thaw at this point, one crazy year.:)**

 **Now I will say this: The next story will be mostly fluff combined with some mystery sleuthing. Elsa, as we all know, needs to become an ice master or be very close to it before trying to take on any white trolls. I say 'mostly fluff' because there will be one epic fail in there at some point near the beginning.:)**

 **After that story I think there will be one more and my series will end. At this point the saga can end in a couple of ways...I'm not sure which I will use yet. Hence why the legend/prophecy is a little unclear as to what the final outcome will be!:)**

 **Thank you to everyone who has read and reviewed this story. Thank you for sticking with me when I wrote too many depressing scenes...seriously, it means a lot. You guys don't deserve a dragging plotline just because I have issues. Not sure what to say here, but really, seriously...thank you. I want to especially thank those of you that have gently pointed out problem(s) with my writing-you know who you are!:)**

 **And to none other than Miss Elsa herself, I'm sorry for sticking you in so many rotten situations and such! I swear you're my favorite character all the same:P**

 **This is MantaI-305Apollo'sChariot signing off for now, over and out!**

 **P.S. I am currently writing another story about little Elsa, Snowflake Sun. I'd love it if you checked it out.:)**

 **P.P.S. If you haven't watched the trailer for the Christmas special...ahhhh, you are SO missing out! It looks so cute:) (and I love love love Elsa's new dress! She looks like she's wearing a night sky or something. Also the coloring and fabric looks EXACTLY how I pictured the cobalt blue dress with the flutter sleeves Elsa has in my story-verse. The neckline isn't the same, of course, but the fabric is exactly as I pictured:))**


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